Episode 63: Why Clutter Feels So Mentally Exhausting: The Reset Every Overwhelmed Woman Needs with The Reset Brunette

Episode Description:

This week, Christina and T sit down with Briana Bazail, creator of The Reset Brunette, for a conversation that goes far beyond organizing.

Together, they unpack the emotional weight of clutter, the invisible mental load women carry, and why so many moms feel overwhelmed in their own homes. From burnout and identity shifts to practical systems that actually work, this episode explores how resetting your space can help you reconnect with yourself again.

Because sometimes it’s not really about the mess. It’s about everything the mess represents.

In this episode, they discuss:
• why clutter affects mental health
• decision fatigue and reducing overwhelm
• organizing for your real life, not old versions of yourself
• systems that work for busy moms and families
• how childhood responsibility shapes adulthood
• teaching kids to contribute to the home
• the connection between peace, identity, and your environment
• realistic resets that make everyday life feel lighter

💗 Pink Spotlight

Each week, we highlight a moment, product, or practice that’s bringing us joy:

T: Mint & Lily birthstone bracelets gifted by her sister for Mother’s Day featuring meaningful family birthstones.

Christina: Colleen Rothschild Ritual Body Oil, a deeply hydrating body oil that helped soothe and moisturize skin after a little too much Florida sun.

Briana: The idea of “resetting” not just your home, but also friendships, routines, pressure, and anything no longer serving your peace.

Connect with Briana: @resetbrunette

🌸 Things We Mentioned

• Folding board Briana uses to maximize drawer and closet space (use code BRI20 for 20% off)

• The RealReal

• VVA Pickup

• Trashie

• ThredUp

This Week’s Sponsor

This week’s episode is sponsored by Ellen Piccolo, founder of The Homemaker.

Ellen is an interior designer focused on creating homes that are both beautiful and functional for the season of life you’re in. In her Pretty in Pink Again episode, she shared insight on designing spaces that evolve with motherhood, routines, and real life, while still feeling elevated and intentional.

Listen to Ellen’s full episode here.

Instagram: @thehomemakerdesignco

Website: www.thehomemakerct.com

Love the Episode?

If this episode resonated, it would mean so much if you took a moment to follow, rate, and review Pretty in Pink Again. It helps us grow, reach more women, and continue having these conversations that matter.

You can also follow along on Instagram @prettyinpinkagain @kristinabontempo and @christinatarabishy for more behind-the-scenes, clips, and everything we’re building beyond the mic. 💗

Transcript

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I'm Christina. And I'm team. And this is the pretty and Pink again podcast where motherhood meets rediscovery. Today's guest is someone we've been following and loving because she's not only talking about organizing, she's talking about resetting your life. Brianna Bazile is the creator behind the Reset Brunette, and what we love about her content is that it's not about perfection or aesthetic bins. It's about getting yourself out of overwhelm and creating a space that actually supports you and your family. Because so many of us probably feel like we're drowning, not just in stuff, but in everything, and this episode will for sure inspire you to do something about it. Guys, this one's so good. Last week, when she came, she left, and I immediately started, like, going drawer by drawer. There we go. Like, little by little. I already caught the bug. You are in for a real treat. Welcome, Brianna. Oh, I'm so happy you're here I've always wanted to do this. The Reset Brunette. I'm so happy. I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having me. So fun to have you here. Were you always a tidy person growing up? Reset Brunette, Brianna, teenager were you tidy and organized? Depends who you ask. I'm sure- Okay if my mother was here- We asked your mother she'd be like she had- What would she say? phases. But I will say that this all started because of my mom. My mom is the most type A- organized. Like recently we sent in all of our home videos to get digitized. Those tapes, it was like 1997, Brianna's first bubble bath. Oh, she had everything, like- Brianna's first laugh. Oh. Joshua's third grade play- I'm so jealous where he fell. Everything was so- Okay so type A. She also just instilled in us very early on you make your bed every morning. If your space is tidy, your life is tidy. That's true. Everything that I am in terms of this business is 'cause of my mom, so shout out to Suzy. She's also come with me to a bunch of projects where I need an assistant. Yeah. And I'm like, "I know who to call." You need her eye. And she comes and she will totally just transform the space with me, but she's amazing. But that's from a very young age, it was her who was like, when your space at home is clear, your mind is clear- It's so true and you're just able to function in all the other aspects of your life, it is so true. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right, so Suzy. Yeah. Bring it in. So Suzy, yeah, and I do think that I was pretty o- my friends would come over and I'd be like, "Sorry for the mess," and it was, like, a sweater on the bed. I was very tidy. And do you enjoy doing this? Is it something- I do You do. You love it. I really do. You get a thrill out of it. Yes, and it's like- 'Cause I find it so daunting, so I'm like this is... But it is probably also because I'm not extremely organized, so it becomes more of a project. But I think when you're organized, to your point- For sure it makes everything. Then it's putting stuff away is easy because everything has a place- Yes and you don't have to wor- Yes it doesn't become a project. Yes, exactly, and I think it is overwhelming in general. Overwhelming is a perfect word. And also, like, when it's your own stuff, it's emotional too. 100%. Even my own stuff I need a second eye to be like- Talk to me about why I don't wanna let this sweater go, that it has holes in it, but I just love it so much. Like, when it's your own stuff, it's just like overwhelming. It's emotional. But when I go into somebody else's, I'm not like tied to any of this, and I'm seeing it with fresh eyes, so you're like, "This is where my jeans go." And I'm like- "Have you thought about putting them here?" Or you're wearing this a lot. Like, why is this not in your prime real estate of your closet? Why?" It's just I'm coming in with fresh eyes but I, it is very emotional and like overwhelming when you do it on your own. That's totally normal to think, 'cause I also think that way. Before you meet with a client- Yeah what is the client's homework? Do you make them do any type of purging before you get there, or are you then involved in the- how do you get the whole- vibe of what you're working with? So no homework. No homework. I don't want... So because this process can be very overwhelming, I don't want to add like another layer to that. Basically, my approach to helping a client out with let's take a closet or something, I get there, I basically ask them to send me pictures beforehand so I can see the space. I never recommend when you're doing it on your own to d- to buy a bunch of bins and all these materials before you do like an edit of your space. But because I've done it so much, I'm like, "I know we're gonna need this amount of hangers. I know we're gonna need like this, and if not, we'll return it." But like beforehand, a lot of people need help purging, so like- I will help them through that. If you can do that on your own, that's the only, homework I'd re- I would say like we'll move along the process faster if you're able to do some editing on your own beforehand. But sometimes that's like the hard part for people. So no homework, and really, like the first thing I do when I get there is like, "What does your, like everyday look like? What does your lifestyle look like? Not what it was. Not what you want it to be. Tell me about your day." Yeah. What are you doing today? What are you doing today? Are you- What are you wearing the most? Exactly. Are you doing, are you like an Uber for your kids, right? Are you just like dropping off and picking up and dropping off and picking up, and then you're like every so often you get to go on date night. Maybe your gown shouldn't be like front and center even though they're like the most beautiful gowns in the world. Yeah. Maybe they need to be in like displayed, but not in again your prime real estate area, right? Or like I love displaying the beautiful Christian Louboutin shoes. Of course. But I don't think you're wearing that to like soccer. Maybe. It clouds the mind. It clouds the mind and it helps- Genetically it it contributes to decision fatigue when you see those things, like mixed in. And I like that you used- Yes the phrase, who you were. Or you- Or who you want to be or who you want to be. Or who you want to be. Because sometimes- Yeah those beautiful things or those things that, remind you of things- Yes you're like, "I want those there"- Yes but they really do cloud. Yes. And they take up, I like, again, the word, the real estate. Yes. The, where it's no, you should be going in and everything should be simple. Yeah. We're talking in terms of closets, right? Yeah. And like your clothing. But it's, it's- But even everything with it exactly. Everything. Everything. Exactly. If it overcomplicates your life, it's, not working with you, it's probably working against you. That's true. Or closets, for females the biggest thing that you get called to do? I would say that's the biggest thing. I would then say it's, playrooms. Or the kids' areas, kids' rooms that turn into playrooms. Yep. And then after that I would say it's a mix of different areas. Sometimes it's the kitchen pantry. Sometimes it's the garage, where it just becomes like a storage unit at this point of just, different phases of your life- that just gets, thrown in there- 'cause it's the ugly part of the house. But I would say closets is, the number one. And then it, honestly, once that happens you realize- You're hooked how good this feels. Oh, it's addictive. Most of my clients are, repeat clients. I could totally see that. For different sections. For different sections. And I will say, too, it's funny 'cause, usually the husbands are like, "Why are we bringing this chick in?" "Why are we doing this?" And then I leave, and they're like- Ooh "Hey, so my h- my wife is so happy." Yeah. "When can you be back?" Or they're like, "Hey do you think you can maybe do my section of, my closet?" Yeah. I'm sure with a closet, though that's probably a s- a situation where you can come in and you get everything really tidy and organized and in a good place. And then I'm sure seasonally, or after, I don't know after a certain period of time something might, things might not fit again, or you need to get- rid of things, and trends come and go. Like- Yeah but that's probably something that you can do every once in a while. But I'm sure- things like the pantry, the kids' rooms- Yeah like, where stuff just needs to come and go so quickly- Yeah and it's like- And when you have multiple people- Yes accessing it. Yes. Like- I'm curious, you said a lot of your customers are repeat. When you walk back into a house that you've done- And maybe you're doing a new space. Yeah. What do the other s- What does the space that the reset brunette has s- put her stamp on- Do you check it? What does it look, what does it look like six months later? Because I'll tell you what, one unsuccessful Friday night out for me, and my closet- That's it. We're done. I'm the same way. We're done. We're done. I'm done. We're done. I'm the same way too. Yeah, like- The floor is clear. I have nothing to wear. I'm bloated. I'm fat. Yeah. Ugh, forget it. Yeah. There's nothing there. No, there's nothing here for me. Clothes on the ground again. Yes. It's so funny, 'cause I feel like a police, like when I walk back in- I'm like, "There's-" What happened? "law enforcement's back." Yes. But it's funny 'cause, I'll usually... My repeat clients, I'll start on a new section when I come back usually. The project is never to do "Oh my God, this is complete..." It's never been that. "My closet needs you to come in and completely redo it again." It's never been that. Because- Oh, maybe just some editing or some help again. Exactly. A little touch-up. Or "Hey..." Exactly. Yeah. "I thought I made-" Because why? Because we put systems in place that support that lifestyle, her lifestyle, his lifes- lifestyle. Okay. Even the pantry. We're putting systems in place that support the current lifestyle. So the great part is that when I come back, we focus on a new section. But then we're like, "Hey, let's do little refreshes," which is I like to do my play on the Rs. So we'll come back and refresh those areas. But it's so easy, and it's so simple. It really only takes, an hour to okay we have a new bag. Where does the bag go, right? Or we're traveling a lot this month, so or we've been traveling a lot, or we haven't been traveling the suitcase doesn't need to be here. Or maybe it does need to be here, and we need to find a spot for that. But the refreshes end up being less time-consuming because there's already a home for everything. I think that's a really good point because you said it before w- with the husbands and when, you're coming to this decision to have someone come in, and you're like, "This is an investment," right? A lot of things are an investment. Exactly. And sometimes you might think that it will fix things for a short term. Temporarily. But you're saying that a lot of the times it ends up helping with the systems in the home, and this is something that has longevity yes, exactly. That's really nice to hear. And really the system should support you over time, right? Think about- where you are today and, honestly, where you will be in a year from now. A lot of parents are like, "I'm pregnant. I have to move everything around." "I had this nursery that you came and you organized, and basically now we're moving rooms, and now this is gonna be a new room." Or "Hey, I set up this entire playroom," "and my kids no longer play with XYZ. Now it's Barbies and Legos- and Minecraft." And it's okay we have the bins. We need to change the labels. So those things are the goal is to have a system that moves with you over time versus having to constantly re-up your life and change the whole thing from scratch. And that's an example of a system. Yes. Can you give a couple other like specific- Yeah examples of- systems that you see work for a lot of your clients- Yeah that are like middle-aged women, young kids- For sure that you implement for the family. For sure. So I like the idea of having like a playroom with a lot of cubes and bins. And so I think having those staple products in your house and being able to rearrange them for whatever the season of life is. So that example of changing out the bin labels for toys that are now, what we're playing with now for the kids. Another thing in the closet I see a lot of is bins again, but it's oh, seasonal stuff, right? So I'm switching in and out all the time, so I have this bin. Sometimes it's for scarves, and then it's for bathing suits. So it's stuff like that where it's like I have this bin that stays, but it's just a matter of changing a label clip and where it takes 30 seconds of my day versus all right, I'm taking out a drawer that has all my scarves and all my tights, and now I'm gonna replace it with my bikinis. And while you're doing those switches too, the important part is editing it, right? Good part, so it's like I didn't wear it this season. So like- Oh, so smart I'm probably gonna part with this. Where do you put the off-season stuff? Usually in a bin, So that's the thing too, like- So maybe not a pretty bin, maybe like a storage bin? Something storage. When we talk about primary estate- that's always gonna be like anything that's eye level. And then it moves into the low level where you're not having to get a ladder, but it's not at eye level, so like things could get lost. But so nothing that you're using every day should be at the bottom or at the top. It should be like in this mid-range where it's like easily accessible. Oh, I see. After, then it's what are the things that I'm not using all the time? So think about your purses, right? Like you're maybe having your one or two that's like your everyday purse, but then you have this cute clutch that you wanna wear for like happy hour. You have, I don't know, this bag that I'm taking for a beach vacation- with a straw bag. Those are the things that probably go up at the top. Same thing with like dust bags, like a bin. So all of the dust bags, I like to either like stuff it in the purse that it goes with, or I have a little bin where it's all my travel cubes. Like my travel cubes, my dust bags, all those things. So when I'm going to go travel, and I think about your lifestyle, like you're going to go travel, I'm going to grab the travel cube, I'm gonna go to this one bin every single time versus like- Where's that dust bag for that specific pair of- Also the dust bag for the purse and the shoes that it came with go in the travel- All the, all, exactly 'cause that's when you'd be using it. That's a really good point. Jesus. Yes, exact- Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Jesus. And then your low- Your low. Yeah, right? And s- 'cause mine are, like, in the box that the shoe came in- and the box is up top. You think I'm ever getting up top- No If you're thinking about what you would use this for- make it easier for when you actually go- That makes sense and do that thing. Yep. And then your low section is maybe it's the high boots that you're gonna wear every so often. But it's I want them easily accessible. I like to put shoes at the floor. I don't like to put bags on the floor. But you know- It's bad luck. Yeah. There you go. Exactly. But yeah, if you're able to have a system that supports you over time, those things inside the bins, those things inside the belt container those things might change, but the system doesn't change. I see. So it's like you're moving through life, you're getting a new belt, you're getting a new bag, new shoes, new food, right? Maybe you're not having oatmeal anymore. Maybe you're having something else, but the container stays. The items in those containers change. I understand. And they should just support you over time as your- Okay seasons change. And I'm sure it's just habits too, so if you're used to everything going back in the home that it now has, it's just easier to keep up with that, and it's also- I use the word addictive because I'm sure once everything is in place, that feeling- Everything in its section you don't want the, you don't wanna go back, yeah. You're like, "Oh, that must feel so relieving to come in- Yes and see everything organized," and then it helps with the decision fatigue. Or just mental organization and removing mental clutter because you're like, "I know where- For sure everything is." A lot of the times I'm sitting there, and when I have to then go prepare myself to leave, I'm like, "I don't even know where these things are." Sometimes m- in my mind, the to-do is to find the things that- Find the things I need for the next thing. That's so an- Especially when you're going through a travel that's so infuriating. So if everything was just had a place and I knew mentally where it was, imagine that one line item could just come off of my mind. Yes, and most of the time too you're living in a house with a lot of other people. Or a lot of people are coming in and out. There's a lot of nannies, housekeeping. There's a lot of users. Yes. There's a lot of users in the house. Yeah. Yeah. And it should be a system that's not- vague enough for people to be like, "Does this go here?" Like kid snacks. Okay, great. So like the, the- the Instacart comes in and all your kids' snacks are here. And like I know that goes there every time. And then your kids know where that goes, so like- And you do that by labels. Yes, labeling. Label everything. Label everything. And, and- Just with an old-fashioned Sharpie or like a label maker, or what are you doing? So you can do it however you want. I love a label maker because it's clean- and it's easy- and they make them really compact now. Yeah. So like you can really just keep it in the pantry. You can keep it, in- Wow in an office stationary area, in your room. That could be a part of your system is the label maker lives in the pantry. Li- lives in the pantry. Yeah. Then you take out- Exactly. Yep, take it out. Next year, iPhone. Yep. Exactly. Also, like clear bins I love because you can see in them. But if, you, you prefer just like a more clean aesthetic where like you have a rattan bin or like a different material, you have, you can put like a label clip on it, and then basically put the label on it, and you can do it with a Sharpie, a dry erase marker. You could do it however. You don't need a label maker. But if you label things, it's no longer just a bin, which ends up then being a catch-all- That's true 'cause then it ends up being clutter again, 'cause then you're like, "Why is the pasta in here and also my kids' socks?" That's what- Do you know what I mean? is happening right now at my house. So- That's a really good point. Nothing. 'Cause even my pantry, I have roll-out bins so I try to put like the pasta and the rice together, but because there's not a label- Yes it's it becomes whatever else goes in there- Exactly goes in there. And you're like, it might as well just say carbs. Exactly. Just carbs. It's just things that like I should- Carbs. Yeah. It's too open-ended when there's not- Yes a label on it. It, there's- it's so vague- where it's okay, everything that's not over there should just come in here. And then that ends up being a pile, which leads to decision fatigue, because decision fatigue is a bunch of micro decisions that are never made. It's just piles. Like- I hate that word. If I hear that word one more time, I'm gonna scream. Yeah. I just- Yeah, I hate it I hate it because I feel like it's just used constantly because- it's just everywhere. Yeah. Because to your point, like- Yeah just all of these little thoughts, like my- Like- brain looks like my pantry. For sure. It never finishes. It's just like- Yeah it's just like micro decisions- that are never made, and all of those things are just like clutter in your mind. And there's such a huge correlation from your space not being clear to your mind not being clear. Clutter raises cortisol, especially in women. There is like a direct correlation in that. So- That's why you're so chill You have little ones at home That's why I'm so chill. That's why you're so chill. Yeah, no, the inside of my brain is like a monkey clapping cymbals, like- at all times. It's Guys, you don't even understand. I hope- No that our Instagram clip shows this. Brianna just came in here. She's got fully- Cool, calm, and collected brown hair. Yep. She's just super chill, sitting back- Pure perfection. Tia and I did our episode- And I'm like, "Dang it" a couple weeks ago about the behind-the-scenes of our podcast- Oh my gosh and maybe we could use a little reset brunette in our life. I'm... Oh my gosh, that'd be amazing. Are you kidding me? We need a lot of reset brunette. But everything in here is so tidy, too. There wouldn't be anything to do. But- actually, I, not to go off on a tangent, but after last week, Christine and I had a hell of a day. We did. And it started over a phone charging block that we couldn't find. Find. Because one of my kids stole it for his room, and we couldn't charge my computer- and we couldn't record. Like- Oh my gosh the snowball effect of just- It's so true, right? not having a place to keep the charging blocks. And remember we said, "And then a label would help," if we knew this charging block is- And a label. Christina said- Yes "Christina, you have to label the Pippa stuff, like Pippa office. Your kids won't touch it if it says- Pippa office." "It'll work." Or even if they do- Cannot then we know to get it back. Oh, my gosh. And then we're not like, "What?" So that probably helps- Caught red-handed in every- "See that this is labeled, and it's in your room." Oh. Yes. Yes. Or now we know to return it, 'cause we don't know if it's... We don't know if it's open-ended. But I... Oh my gosh, I was so mad. I was like, "Vincy, where is my charging block?" He's "Right here, Mom. I was using it for my phone," or whatever. I'm like- Yeah "Great. I couldn't work today because of you." You're like- "Thanks." So anyway, so I did a little- So funny reset with him. I made him help me. There you go. And I put them in this little thing right here. There you go. That's where it goes. So now we have a bin. That's where they go. Now we have a space- There you go for- Exactly the chargers. Yeah. It's as simple as that. Yeah. We were- You know, I'm sure that's something that everybody fi- Yeah. Everyone's fighting over cords and- So everybody has a charger thief in their family. Yeah, exactly. That's what it is. Everybody's done. Do you have other s- good suggestions for charging systems? So I love- Other than just running to CVS every time I can't find one. Have a lot of charger thieves in my family, too, and I think everybody does. Charger thieves. Charger thieves. Love it. Yeah. I do think so. And I am probably a perpetrator when it comes to the chargers, especially with my parents. There's something about... Because it's like they do have everything at all times. And I'm an adult, but I also am like, "It... You have a charger." "Do you have a charger?" "Can I have that?" But my- I go grocery shopping in my parents' pantry all the time. Yeah. I'm almost 40 years old. I'm not too proud to admit that. Yeah, of course. So every time... And my family's in Miami, and so whenever I go down, I'm always forgetting a charger, of course. But my mom knows me at this point, and she's like- She always has an extra Oh, no, she labels everything She's "This is mine." So each cord has like a tape around it that says like Mom's- There you go Stop Dad's- Yep Brianna's. So I'm like, but then it's like I'm physically charging my phone and it says Mom on it, and I'm like- So you can't steal that. Yeah, so then you can't feel weird about it. Yeah. But no, but it's I would say first of all, make sure that they work before they're put into like the dreaded charger bin. But then two things, I think label it with a piece of tape. Very easy. Initials, or like what it's used for- so that and then they have these which again, you can use a rubber band, but they do have s- like a rubber or silicone zip tie where the chargers stay together because then you run into a bin that's just like chargers like this. Chargers all connected, but label what it is and then keep it together. Yeah, you can wind it up and then put- Yes zip tie it almost and then keep it labeled. Rubber band. Yep. Yep. Do anything that you... you don't even need to get... A lot of the things too, it's like organizing, there's such a consumer like, "Buy this bin. It's gonna save your life. This hanger is going to save so much space." You actually don't need a lot. Yes, it's c- it's gorgeous to have the purse display and the belt display, but you really don't need a lot. A lot of this can be done with just what you have. It doesn't need to be aesthetic. No. It- it will still serve the same purpose- Yeah and probably make you feel the same if it's just done. Put a piece of painters tape- around the charger- and put your initials on it. Grab a rubber band and keep your charger together. Yes, it's so much fun ordering things on Amazon and getting all the latest and greatest. No, but then you just have more stuff that you don't know where to put. That's the point. Yeah. 'Cause sometimes I, I can't even tell you how many times I've had something and I'm like, "I'm just gonna throw it away 'cause I don't even know where to put it." You're like, "I don't know where it goes to." I'm just, I don't know what this is. Extra screws. I don't know where it goes to. What does it go to? We don't have a home for it. I'm throwing it away, and then my husband will be like, "Did you just throw- Where was the- something away?" Yeah. And I'm like, "Yeah." And he's "I..." My husband is he i- insanely organized. Like almost to the point- Oh, amazing where it's like annoying 'cause I'm like, "Why are you so perfect, and I'm like a mess? How do you cohabitate with me?" It's always, but it's always that's makes the best couple. It's like- There's always one one is like Type A- Yeah and then the other one is like Type B, and that's like what makes the perfect team. Yeah. He comes home from work, we have lockers when you walk in the shoe room. Beautiful. There's six lockers. His locker has a little dish in it, and he puts his ring, his watch, his wallet. He has an extra charger, a pen and that's it. Does he want a job? He- And my- I'm like- cubby has I don't know, my ski boots in it, and it's Ap- it's May. Yep. Sweetie, you know I hate skiing. Yeah. It just doesn't- I know even make sense. I know, but I- So maybe if I'm in real estate. Yeah, you don't even need those. No. You don't even ski. Of course I don't, but like- Yeah that's my problem. He's "I built you- Yeah all of this stuff," 'cause he's also a builder. He's "I built you all this stuff so this problem wouldn't happen. I can do it. The kids can do it. Why can't you?" I'm like, "I don't know." He's "I don't know." So what do you do, then, with somebody like me, who's just a naturally messy person? I don't know if I'm always in a rush or I'm careless- Yeah or I just don't know where to put it- Yeah so I just stick it there. But do you if you have systems in place, do you then follow them? Maybe. I don't know. Okay, two- I don't know if I've ever had a system in place, then. 'Cause, yeah, so maybe you need to- maybe that's the problem start from the ground. To your point. I I know I'm a mess- I don't think I've ever had a system but then if I have a system in place, I can follow it. So- I just don't wanna put the system in place. Correct. Okay. Yes. So I actually think that people are not inherently messy. I have a lot of clients who are like, "I'm a mess, I'm a mess," and I'm like, "I just don't think you have a system that supports your current lifestyle." Meaning, so when you get home from work what are the things that you're doing? What what do you do the second you got home, you get home from work? Pee. Take the dog out. Okay. Then somehow I find a random shoe and I pick it up that the dog had eaten. Yep. Then I get a snack, then I run and grab my kids. Okay. Then I run up here. Okay. Then I get a phone call and I'm scrolling on Instagram. For example first thing you do when you get home you should have an area for your keys and your wallet and your bag. Everything should go in that same exact zone. That drop zone. Okay. That's what, yeah. So make a routine. Come in and go- Exactly to that one area. Everything has its place- Okay and then you know where it is when you leave the house again to go get the k- get the kids. Okay. Your dog leash or whatever you have to take the dog out should also be- Also right there should also be right there, or at least in a place where, like, all the dog stuff is, and it should be hanging, and it should be ready for you. You shouldn't have to be, like, shuffling through bins to find that one thing. Okay. Then from there what did you say you do af- right after that, you or scrolling? Then, I don't know. I'm just saying then I probably get distracted, is my point. Oh, the shoe, right? Yeah, then I find the shoe- the shoe that the dog eats, right? that the dog ate. That shoe there should be, and again it's, it, I find a lot of times that shoes go in your room with your closet and all your stuff. But there is a little section maybe in the garage or maybe, like- in the front where it has, like- shoes. So I have a love-hate relationship with that because- That's awful I do feel like then the shoes start piling. They do. And then you have like- 'Cause then they're like piling Then you never make it back to the room. Then, yeah. Then you never make it back. Then you have shoes in two places. Yes. So I actually- I always need the shoes wherever those other shoes are too. Yes. Exactly. I'll be like going to get dressed- Yeah, like let's- Exactly talk about this let's talk about this exactly. So for example, like then you have just like another piece of clutter in your- room. And then also then let's say you have a basket. You're not touching the shoes at the bottom. No. So like then you just have a pile of dirty shoes, right in the front of your house, which is where you walk in, and like immediately you're hit with clutter. Immediately. But what I do is like maybe it's a system where the shoes are covered. Maybe it's like a place where one of those drawers where like you can put the shoes and then you can close it- that you don't see a bunch of shoes. Or maybe it's a s- it's a tiny bin where like the second the shoes come up, you have to take them back, right? It's almost like a notification for you to be like, "Oh, the shoes are piling up again." Then they go to their place. 'Cause then it's like I can't see the bin now, or I can't see, the shoes are coming out of the rack that's in the garage. So it's stuff like that where it's like you have to have a system that supports your lifestyle- Okay and make that routine, right? So it's okay, I wasn't able to put the shoes in right when I got home 'cause I have to go pick up the kids. But when I get back, before I go to sleep, all of these shoes have to go back to their home because I know that tomorrow when I get home, then those- They'll just pile on other shoes are gonna do the same thing. Okay. And then we're gonna do the same... So it's almost, it's about a system that supports your lifestyle and rou- and a routine- that really should also support your lifestyle. Do you find that then people have to change their routine, or do you find that it just works in tandem? She just a- she just asked my routine and made a system around the routine, right? Do you try to do that most? Yes. Okay. So e- exactly. Tell me what you're wearing, tell me what you're doing, tell me what your pain points are right now. Is it because the shoes don't have a place, which is why you're having to constantly like hound shoes up is because the shoes don't currently fit? Maybe it's like you have too many shoes right now. Yeah. Just, like that's the other thing too. Like I- Oh, yeah, maybe- sometimes it's less about I need a new bin or like I need a new system. It's maybe less- Maybe you need less stuff maybe you need less stuff. Yeah. Yeah. And- And I think that's why it's so- Good point helpful to have someone else do it for you because you see all of the clutter and all of the Instagram tips on how to make everything organized, but if it doesn't actually work with your lifestyle, you might be seeing how it works with someone else's lifestyle. Yeah. And then you're trying to adapt or adopt that. Yes. And then it, and then that's why it's not working. Even if you do have a system in place- Good point it's someone else's system- Yes and not your system built for what you actually do and how your home is laid out and how many kids you have and- all of these things. It's- No it's different. So every single space that I've ever done- All of it looks different. It's customized. There has never been a closet, and I can t- I can 100 tell you there's never been a closet, a pantry, a garage that has looked identical from the one before. If we did all of our closets today, yours and mine would look completely different because- We should do that our lifestyles are different. Yeah. We should do that. Yes. Yeah. And even, like, all my stuff on Instagram you can see sometimes I fold the jeans, sometimes I hang them. Sometimes- sometimes the leggings are rolled and sometimes they're stacked or sometimes... it just, it depends on how much you have. It depends how often you're reaching for it. But it's so centered around your lifestyle that I don't think anyone's messy. I think that you just don't have a good system that supports- your lifestyle. If you're taking the kids and you're getting a snack is that snack that you're reaching for at eye level, and is it easy for you to just grab and go? Or is it in a box instead of being in a container right- Or is it- just having the- in a glass jar that looks pretty but- That I have to- It's not functional bend down and let my kids- climb up on the counter and grab it? Exactly. The stuff that's- K- yeah in the glass jar- Even- is gonna expire. Exactly Even for kids' stuff I don't have kids yet, but I work with so many moms, and I also always grew up with small kids around me. Like, all my cousins. My youngest cousin, who is basically my niece, is 23 years younger than me. And like, all my first cousins are, have always been babies as I grew up, so I feel like I was always around kids. And what I learned is that, like, when you start setting up systems early on- they start to build their routine around their systems. And so what I've learned is, let's take a playroom. Those labels that we put on, if your kids aren't reading, it's a picture of a Barbie. Or it's a picture of a Lego, so that they know that, "My Legos go back here, and I can't take something else out." That's another thing that Susie taught me, is that one toy at a time. You're only playing with one toy at a time, and if not, you put it you put, you pick it up, you put it back- Put it away in the section. Ugh. But if they are reading, then it, maybe it is a fun label where, they're practicing. Yeah, you see the picture on it or a few different- Exactly pictures on the label. Exactly. And they're associating that, okay, when everything is back in its place they feel calmer. Yeah. They do. And you're also, you're- And it's fun you're, your game. Your household- Yeah is al- exactly. Yeah. It becomes a game, right? It's fun. So that's where Susie Homemaker came from. Yes. Your mom, she was the original. She's, the founder- Literally of this brand for real. She, I cannot- It's just I'm the face of it, but she's probably, the brains behind it. Yeah. You gotta, sh- should be interviewing Susie. she instilled that in us very young, and I am a firm believer that when you have a system that your kids are also able to follow. Also, that's the thing too, like- Maybe the system is really easy for, you and your husband or you to follow, but because they can't reach the snacks or, maybe you don't want them to reach the snacks. Every parent is different, right? And depending on, like, how the, how old the kids are. I have a client who's her three-year-old daughter, she doesn't want her to get the snacks- all the time- because she's going to be eating snacks all day and cookies all day. But then my nine-year-old's client, or my nine-year-old's mom- Yeah who's the client- He's your client too? Yeah, he's my client too. I get there and he's like- "What are you here for?" Yeah. Huh? Put the snack drawer where I can reach it. Some guidance, suggestion from the- Yeah. He's like- Yeah. But sometimes the snacks should be accessible for,\ the nine-year-old who's maybe packing his snacks in the morning, right? Kitchen drawers. I always love a drawer that, the kids can reach so that they can be in charge of getting their plates out. Things that instill responsibility in them. I love doing that for parents because I do think that they're like, "Wait, that's one less thing I have to do." Yeah. My kids can reach the dishwasher, right? They can put it now away. There's no excuse that you can't put it in the tall cabinet 'cause they can't reach it and whatever. Like- Everything is at your level. Yeah. Everything is at your level. All right. I'm gonna talk through a couple of systems- Yes that aren't working for my children. And I'm gonna see- Please tell us if you can jump in. Please. So there's a hamper in the bathroom. Yep. Okay. The clothes somehow end up on the ground next to the hamper. Do you have a suggestion for a better system there for a 13 and 10-year-old boy? So let's see. I think that no iPad for a week. No, I'm just kidding. They're like, "Take everything from them." The consequence. Yeah. Yeah. For every sock out of the hamper- Yeah is a half hour off the iPad. Oh my God, it's like a mom tax. Yeah. Yeah wait, I like that. I like that a lot. Yes. Today's episode is brought to you by Ellen Piccolo, founder of The Connecticut Homemaker. Ellen doesn't just design beautiful spat- spaces. She creates homes that actually function for real life. Think mud rooms that can handle the chaos, kitchens that flow with your day, and systems that make everything feel just a little bit easier. It is not about perfection. It is about creating a space that supports you in every season of your life. From toddlers to busy teens, busy mornings to slow nights, your home should evolve with you. Home should feel like a place where you walk in and exhale, but for so many of us, it becomes a space where we're constantly trying to keep up with instead of one that supports us. That's where Ellen Piccolo comes in. As the founder of The Homemaker, Ellen approaches design differently, blending elevated aesthetics with thoughtful, intentional function. Every space is considered, every detail has purpose. From refined livable kitchens to beautiful integrated storage that disappears into the design, she creates homes that feel effortless as they are functional, because true luxury isn't just how a home looks, it's how it is lived in. You can find Ellen Piccolo at The Homemaker on Instagram and tell her Pretty in Pink Again sent you. So- So what are some systems- What does the hamper look like? It's just a big black abyss. It's actually a black hamper in the bathroom. Yeah. Just put your dirty clothes in it. Yeah. So do we think that either the hamper is not working for them? Or do we think that they think it's an o- like, do what are you- Like an option? Yeah. Is it... i'm curious what they think about the hamper. So if it's right next to it, like- Yeah what do we, what- they're getting there, but it's not going in i'm curious, I'm actually if I would probably ask your sons. I'd be like why aren't you throwing it in there?" Okay. Is it that is it full? You feel like it, it's towering over and so it falls out? Or is it that you don't know it's supposed to go in here? Tell me what that thing is. Or is it because sometimes I put clean clothes in the hamper folded, and then I put them in their room. Okay. Yeah. So I'm like, do you think that it's, like- okay, so maybe ask them. Maybe ask them. Okay. Yeah, so this is right here, and this is for this. Do you know that? Okay. All right. Or, like, where are you getting... So I guess the bathroom, like, where are you getting undressed? It should be there. Yeah. That's why it's there. Exactly. You gotta get undressed, take a shower- Yeah in your bathroom. So I think that might be user error, not your- Okay not your error. Okay. Yeah. I think that might be system approved. Okay. I think it might be. System approved. Okay, another question is socks and shoes for kids. I don't like the kids to- and I know you're the same way. Oh, the socks are so hard. Wear their shoes in the house. Yes. Yeah. Yes. I like them to take their shoes off at the door- Yeah and leave them in the garage, 'cause I think that they're- Yeah my kids are gross. Somehow we never end up with socks. Yes. 'Cause, like- That is- the socks live upstairs- That's a very relatable problem in their room. And the so- and there's the rest of their shoes live upstairs in their room. Yes. Yeah. So- We're the same way, so this guy, maybe this could be universal so where would you suggest- Oh a sock situation? Yeah. Because typically socks- Yeah go in the room, and then- Yeah I'm running upstairs- Yes to the room for socks. Like- When we're trying to leave. Yeah. That's a good point. Yes. It's almost like shoes are annoying, 'cause there's two different spots for them. I know we've talked about, a lot about shoes. No. But it's- But think about your lifestyle. No, this is terrible. Yeah. I would really keep a bin of socks next to the shoes. Okay. And if you don't want socks everywhere, I would do a closed bin, and I would do a bin that's pretty that looks like decor. I love functional storage, but like- So just keep a closed bin of socks in the shoe room or in the mud room or whatever. If your pain point is that you don't wanna keep going up and down and up and down- Yeah and up and down, then you need to change the system. And that's applies for everything. If something is not working for your lifestyle, I'm... I preach about it doesn't have to be perfect. It has to be functional first. And then after, maybe you can figure out is there a way to make this a little prettier, right? People are coming into this section of the home all the time. I walk in, this is the first thing I see. But maybe it's a beautiful bin- Yeah that also functions as storage. Those coffee tables that have a hidden storage underneath it, that it looks like decor, but it actually operates more functionally for you. But I would keep, right? And don't keep all of them down there, but keep- keep some socks up there. Yeah, you need some socks or some socks- Sort of like hair stations for girls in the morning or for kids. Yeah. I, there's so many times where there's a station upstairs in their bathroom, and then there's a section downstairs for moms in the morning in their bathroom at the downstairs powder room. And it's a drawer, and it's a little clear acrylic drawer of all their hair ties and all their bows- Right and a little thing, a little travel thing of gel And so that you're not like, "Oh my gosh, I have to run upstairs back to do the hair." There's like a hair station downstairs and a hair station upstairs so you could have two. Now, if you're in a one story h- And it's like a miniature one, 'cause it's just- Exactly for like- Exactly. You don't need- okay, while you're eating your cereal today before school, we'll do a little touch-up or whatever. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. So same thing with the socks. Some socks for each kid- maybe go downstairs, some go upstairs. Exactly. So it's just the system- Exactly that has to get put in place. Exactly. Yep. And like yours might look different than mine. Or like someone might be in a first floor or just one story- Yeah that like doesn't need to have- but that's not your situation- so like it needs to change with you sort of thing. Seems so simple, but it's like when you're in the moment, you're like- I know, you're like, "Oh my gosh" why is this so frustrating? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. What else, T? 'Cause that was a, I feel like that was a relatable one. I'm sure other people feel the same way with the socks. We started doing like teeth brushing downstairs in the powder room. Same. We, but we, and then that's another one where we have a double. We have a tooth- Because- A toothbrush for each kids downstairs do you know how many times I'm like, "Did you brush your teeth?" Yeah. "Nope." And then if they go back upstairs, we're late for school. Really? They're never gonna see their face again. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's done. So we just, we brush our teeth right here. Yeah, might as well just go back to sleep. Yeah. Yeah. They're not going to. That's it. That's it. It's done. We're done. Yeah, so that's a good point. So that's a good system that works, to have two. Maybe we'll ping it to you then. What are some other things that you've implemented- Yeah that you're like, this, it was a pain point from the mom or the dad- Yeah or the kids. Yeah. So we decided to just simply move it in the home. Yeah. I've noticed this with people who have kids. Because a lot of the times, too, it's like adults are just gonna go upstairs, right? But even then, like sometimes there's like a little stash of deodorant and a little mini perfume in the bathroom downstairs, and like everyone has a shelf, right? So like the kids have a shelf, or the kids have a drawer- and the parents have a drawer. And I would say like everything that like, a- and also, like I have a little kit in my car of a little mini deodorant, like a little, like Tide To Go stick, but it's those things that you're on the go, and if there's something that is gonna throw me off my system or throw me off of my day, that is gonna go in the little- The running away from home bag? Yes. The running away from home bag. I love one of those. Yes. And it's clear, maybe it's a toiletry bag in the powder room. Maybe it's not even a full system that's gonna take, 'cause then it takes some storage away, too, for like real, for the guest bath- bathrooms. Everyone's doesn't have just like a, so much space that like you can just have an extra drawer dedicated for this person. But maybe it's literally a toiletry bag that's filled with the kids' toothbrush- a few hair ties and a few bows. A little travel toiletry gel. Maybe it's a travel toothbrush as well, for the last minute things. But basically, like creating a little bag or a drawer or a shelf that supports the last minute- checklist items before leaving the house. That could really derail your morning. Yeah, or if your- routine changes for some reason that day and you're like, "We're running late, and now I don't have time to run back upstairs," and you're running around. Yeah. And so it's like maybe you keep an emergency, like these are the things that we are always- Tampons, pads. Yes. Like I have to run upstairs. We're always running. And, and- Yes like I forgot. You know what I mean? Like I'm gonna get my period today. Yeah. Oh my God, I have to- Yeah. Yeah. It can add another 15 minutes up to your day. But if you just- Exactly had it with you in the car- Right Exactly where you're going. A little stash of Advil, like a little, anything- Yeah like that where it's like it's just nice to have those things on hand because it- could really just put a, put an extra five minutes here on your day, which like your schedule's already tight. I guess if you feel like you have kids that put clothes next to a hamper- Yeah like how do you organize a teenager, yeah. Yeah. Like how do you create a really, a long-term system for a teenager? Are you putting things that are hanging so it's easier for them to rehang their clothes? Are you having mom do it? It's really hard to balance- Yeah that because- Yeah also I've noticed with my kids getting a little older, like they want things their way. Their way. They don't want me coming in there. They want their privacy. Of course. But also, the baseball uniform needs to be in the blue section, or I'm gonna be getting a phone call. "Where's my uniform?" Yeah. So like it also has to be my way. Yeah. Yeah. So how do you blend those two- Yeah when you're organ- when you're helping a mom organize their kids? I think first and foremost, the kids have to have a sense of responsibility for the things- Yeah that are theirs, and I'm a firm believer in that 'cause I grew up that way. And so if I didn't have my- said thank you. 'Cause also your job is to create like independent kids, and I'm, I don't have kids, but my parents did that and- It's clearly served you so well. You said it from the beginning. When it's instilled from the beginning, it's, it makes it easier. It's like becomes- Yeah part of your DNA. And- You take pride in your belongings. Yeah. Yes. And I- Which is nice I will say it all the time, but I think if everybody had my parents nobody would ever doubt themselves. Really from the very beginning instilled a sense of responsibility in me- Yeah things. And if I didn't follow through with those things, there were consequences. For example I grew up dancing competitively all my life. And so my mom was like, "Did you pack your bag? 'Cause that's your responsibility. It's not mine. That is your responsibility." And if I didn't have my tights- That was on you I had to reap the consequences at my ballet teacher was, "You have to sit out of class." Susie needs to come with me to- Yeah, she needs to come on this podcast Susie- To dance? Susie's gonna have a grandchild today, maybe. Yeah. And so I'm like, "Oh, this grandchild's gonna start folding-" Because first one clothes next week." Because I am also a dance- First one. Oh, she is. Oh my gosh. Oh, that's so exciting. That's the call we're waiting for right now. Congratulations. That's the call we're waiting for, yeah. I'm actually on a flight right after this. We are currently waiting for a call right now for- what is- Yes, my first nephew for your nephew. Blood related- Yes 'cause I do have other nieces and nephews from my fiance. And so- Yeah so I already have five. But on your side of the family and I have two of my little cousins- That's so exciting who are basically my nephews. So I have seven wedding children. But this is your brother's. Yeah. This is my brother, my only sibling- Yeah first baby. First baby, and first baby from this side. Aw. That's so exciting. Yes. So we're super excited- Yeah, so we're ha- we have her phone out in case- Yes in case there's a call that comes through. I'm waiting- That's so exciting I'm waiting for Josh and Christy's call. So exciting. That is really exciting. By the time- So exciting this airs, I'm sure the baby- Yes will be born. Oh my gosh. We were saying that- My mom so your mom taught you how to take responsibility- Yeah for your things at a young age. And I think that was really the root of why I think systems are so important- and why I think instilling that responsibility in kids at a young age is really important, is because I think that when you do that, I think, first of all, it allows parents to not feel constantly overwhelmed. You already have to manage your own schedule. Managing other children's schedules, I can't imagine how hard it is, and I know that point will come in my life. But I see it's your stuff. It's your working schedule. It's your social relationships. It's your actual relationship. It's your kids' now relationships. It's a household. It's your social life. It's everything. It's a household. What can I offload? It's having your own personal assistants. Your kids should have that responsibility of, my room is my space. And I feel like that was ingrained in me very early on because I knew that- If I didn't have that, I would let my team down. I would let myself down. If I forgot that one thing it wasn't mom and dad's responsibility, it was my responsibility because I had to reap the consequences, and sometimes I did. What was, a consequence, if you don't mind me asking? A consequence for me? 'Cause this is also now a parenting podcast. I also think she's- So talking about consequence of, she then had to take ownership of that. So if, you forgot your tights, you forgot your tights. Oh, that's on you. That's the consequence. That's- It's like a natural one it's like a double, it's like a double meaning of the word- Oh, I see where it's yeah, there's a consequence of yeah- So I- they might take something away from you- 'cause you didn't do the responsibility. And hey, it took one time- oh, actually, I'll give you a a real example that I still, it's I lose sleep over it, too, 'cause I- Yes, tell us because I'm like, oh, my... So I was competing and I, this was like a 100 person dance. Wow. It was like the big production- Yeah dance. Yeah, the big ensemble production. Yeah. And I forgot a very important, accessory to my costume, which means nobody could wear it. Ugh. 'Cause everybody has to look the same. That feeling. Everyone has to look the same. Oh, yeah. So- Ugh the conversation I had to have with my dance- Like, my stomach dropped 'Cause then my mom's "I'm not telling her. You forgot your backpack. You're in charge of packing your clothes." Ooh. So I had to tail between my legs. I was like, "Miss Jill, I forgot my backpack." And she's "Okay." And my mom, it was funny, too, 'cause my mom always had a really great relationship with my t- dance teacher. And she was like, "I'm so sorry." Yeah. Like- It's on her, though "Hey, this is the..." And, but my dance teacher was like, "She's gotta learn." Yeah. What- She's gotta learn how old were you, may I ask? Yeah, I was, at this point, I was probably in eighth grade. Okay. So- But this had already been part of your responsibility. But this was already, and hey, I never forgot anything again. It's so int- interesting- I never forgot anything again 'cause I think we talk about, this- So there was no shaming involved. Your mom didn't have to berate you. No. She had already set- She never did she already had, she already set the ground rules. You are responsible- Yeah for this. You knew that. Going into it, you were prepped. You forgot. Yes. The consequence was that embarrassment that probably took one- Yeah the whole dance to recover and guess what? She probably was mortified, too, 'cause then she was like- Yeah. Oh, no She had to follow through. Yeah, but she- And then she's "Oh, my gosh" yeah, she had to follow through. And I'm sure in her head she's probably "Am I a bad mom?" Was that too much? W- like- No and then at the end she's "But you never forgot anything again." Yeah. And you were you took so much liberty in packing your stuff then it made you... You know what I mean? Even today, I'm like, I have, I go through all my checklists before I go on a trip or before I do something big. Yeah. And it's not to mean I don't make mistakes, but she let me make calculated mistakes that allowed me to have, responsibility over my life and my consequences- that really fed into what I do today for people. I- So it's like building a system that, This is, your son. If- what sport is he playing right now? He plays every sport. Every sport, so I'm sure there's- I do it and that's a thing, right? There's so many different uniforms that you have to keep track of. There's so many different balls and, equipment that are so important to each sport. And none of it really bleeds into one another. There needs to be a bin for baseball. There needs to be a bin for s- hockey th- and that, that do not bleed. If it's just sports, your hockey puck is gonna be with your baseball hat, and that doesn't go together. But your son should feel responsibility over the fact that, if he doesn't have this item he... If he doesn't bring his sunglasses to, to baseball, he's not gonna see the ball. He's- and he has to deal with that, right? Yeah. Mom and Dad are not gonna come and save the day. Yeah. I think that our generation is taking on a lot of responsibility- We're saving the day where, yes, always. We're saving the day. You're saving the day. We're saving the day. And I think that it's- And that's a lot on you you think that it's serving everybody to- No, we're not take on all the- she- yeah she is, we're always saying, "Show me- What we wanna strive a 20-something list- We always say this that is a product of- this type of parenting." Here we have it right here. Here is our specimen. Yeah. Yes. Easy. The opposite- We're doing it wrong 'cause we're s- yes, we're doing it wrong. 'Cause we have fantastic- I don't think you're doing it wrong. I think you're also doing it because- There's room for a lot of improvement because- And there's also, it's like- Yes we don't need to take on more. That's what I'm talking about we need to edit- You already do- so much. You are in charge of everything. I've signed you up. I have the schedule. I'm taking you there. I got you here. Yes, we're chauffeuring you. I do, like- your job is- That's amazing. Yes you have to come with the bag packed. Yeah. 'Cause my son plays squash. I'll pick him up from school with a snack- Yep and the squash bag because he can't bring it to school. Of course. So now his learned behavior is Mom has the squash bag. But,, he could maybe pack it- and make sure he has everything in it. Yeah. Because do you know how many times I've gotten a call from him, "Where are my goggles? I don't have my goggles. Where's my racket? I don't have my racket." Yeah. Or, "Can you s- Instacart me a mouth guard to the hockey rink? I forgot my mouth guard." Yeah, then you say, "No." "They won't let me," whatever. And then I'm like, oh, my God he's a player. I can't let the team down. But you can. Of course. I think that's the point. But that's the point. I think I need him- i think if I let- him sit out one game- yes. And I think- it was the same for grades, right? Yeah. It was, dance meant so much to me, and my mom wasn't afraid to say "Your grades are slipping. You're not going." And she was- She meant it she meant it. Yeah. And it was like, oh, she's bluffing. I'm gonna call her bluff until I didn't go to that one practice that I still... i'm literally, like- We're gonna book Suzy on this podcast. Oh. Like she needs to just come on and chat about parenting. And did Suzy work- Yes out of the house? What did she do? So she worked in pharmaceutical sales all her life, so today she does something slightly different, and she works with like insurance companies to make sure that the medication gets passed through. She does amazing, beautiful things to make sure medicine is covered. Wow. Shout out Suzy. Yeah. I love her so much. Wow. But but- You can tell and my dad was a teacher. And who also was like the best with kids too. Like every summer he had off, like we didn't go to camp, like we were at Camp Dad. Camp Dad. Oh, what a good blend. Camp Dad. And so yeah, it was amazing. My mom was the breadwinner our whole life, and that was really inspiring because like I had a mom who like, she did everything. She was traveling for work. And a, again, like my dad held it down, and my dad was like, that's my woman." My dad also is like a product of like really strong work ethic as well. So the two of them just made a really great team. But my mom was a hard worker, and that was, I think, really inspiring too, 'cause it was like, I wanna be like my mom. Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing to hear. Sometimes the overarching theme of what this episode was gonna be, and it was about luxury organization coming in, and you realize that it's not luxury. It's like an essential part of being- a person- and a f- and a family member, yes. It's not a luxury. It's something that instills responsibility for the kids, confidence then from those kids- Yes 'cause they feel like they have their shit together. Yeah. Totally. Taking pride in that. Independence. Yes, taking pride in your work- and like taking pride in being a part of the family and the o- overall- Yeah organization of being a family member. It goes so far beyond that. And a lot of the times we have these conversations that we think are gonna be about something, and then it ends up opening up a whole- Something else. We asked you how we could build systems for our kids, and part of your answer was how your mom taught you to build these systems. And still responsibility. Yeah. And still responsibility. Yeah. So I think it's very much applicable to this conversation. Yes, for sure. I know, 'cause you have a bunch- Yeah of moms listening to this right now who are- I know wondering the same thing, which, I'm sure they're like, "You don't have a kid." And I'm like I really, that's the thing too, like I feel like it's so hard for me to stand on like these things 'cause I'm like, I have never been in your shoe- shoes yet. But you were a kid. You were the kid. But you were a kid. I was the kid- Yes who had- You have that point of view the most respect for my mom because- Yes I do feel like she really instilled, like all of those things like like dominoed effect for me. It was like she instilled responsibility. I had to reap the consequences of not following through with those responsibilities. She had systems in place where you know- Make your bed every morning- Yeah 'cause you're gonna feel like you come home to a hotel. Which there's nothing better than spending a whole day out and about. Even on vacation, think about it, you're like at the beach, at Disney, like you're doing all these things. And again, I can't imagine how much those things are amplified when you have kids to take care of on those things, right? It's like not a vacation for you, I'm sure. But then you go home, and then you go to the hotel, and it's like a housekeeper was just here. Oh my gosh. My bed's made. Your mom glamorized things even before that was, like, a thing. Yeah. 'Cause you know how that's a thing now to like, romanticize things- yeah glamorize things- yeah to make you enjoy cooking dinner or making the bed- Of the mundane tasks and she used it even back then for you. Yeah. Yeah, and I guess I think the biggest thing about my new profession- 'cause I didn't do this until last year. Yeah. This is so new. What were you doing before here? I was working in market research, which I loved. And honestly it, I had the best of both worlds. I was working remotely, which allowed me the flexibility to, be able to organize after work or on the weekends. So you're doing this as a side project? Yes. Yeah. Yes, and it actually, I was like, "How am I gonna pay for this wedding, that is coming up- very soon?" And I was like, "How can I start making extra cash on the side?" Which turned into, a profession that I feel so fulfilled in. In the beginning, very much so I was like I loved organizing, and I loved the feeling of after, right? And that, but I thought that was so personal to me. I thought it was just, my OCD shouting and was like, "Yay," "I'm so happy for you." But then family members were moving houses, and they were like, "I need help." It's such a daunting task- to, move from one house to another. Either you're upgrading or you're downgrading, and it's just, you're used to having this one thing in this place, and now you have to figure out a new place for it. When it's your own stuff it's different. It's emotional. But then I would help in these big sort of seasons of life. And the feeling that I got from seeing somebody go from "Oh my gosh," "I have one less thing to do." Or I would have never been able to figure out how to fit all this stuff here. Oh my gosh. Like, It was like one thing that I got off their plate, and it wasn't about the physical of it, it was the mental. It was like- Yeah, you're like changing a life. It sounds so silly- It was like- But you really are. Yeah. I think so much about this brand has really been like this is not about the physical of it, right? I guess on the surface- it is, it's a beautiful closet, but it's much more than that because I think of my life, I'm thinking about this as I speak, so if it's stupid you can cut it. But I'm like a Roomba. So like I'm out in the world and I'm like picking up dust, which I guess is could be tasks or like I'm picking up all these different things from people, and like problems, and like I'm trying to problem solve. And like I'm going about all these little nooks and crannies of my day. And then I go home, and then I'm on my charging dock and I'm like recharging- for the day. But if I, if my home is like not in a space where I can recharge and feel like I'm taking a load off, it's like the dock isn't charged into the wall. It's not plugged in, and I'm just sitting in the dock. I'm sitting in like this battery-operated machine, but I'm not being charged. I'm not re- able to recharge. I think the idea is like you're like out and you already have so much that you're worried about. You have so many different schedules that you're balancing. You have your work. You have your relationships. You have your friendships. You have your all these things. But then you go home, and your home is sh- is supposed to be this like sanctuary for you, and it's supposed to be the place where you can gather and be with your kids or do nothing. Like scroll. Do- Yeah do anything. But like especially for women, it's like you're thinking about a million things at once. Even when you're fully sitting down or like relaxing, you're like, "I have to do like my annual skin screen." I have to book this appointment. I have to order like this thing." And you're never fully able to relax if your home doesn't support your current- Yes lifestyle. It's so true. So I think it actually became less about the physical and more about how fulfilled I felt when like I was able to take off like a load off of somebody. It's so important. It's a true reset. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. And then it- it's like- Oh every time I leave a house I feel good. I feel really good. 'Cause you're charged. Yes. You're leaving feeling charged, and you're- What a beautiful metaphor that's, it's a great analogy. You just came up with that on the- I did live right there, Roomba? I did. Okay. Sponsor me. Jesus. Yes. Oh my God, Roomba. That was amazing. Yes. Tag Roomba. It's honestly so true, though, because we've been circling this whole theme the whole time we've been talking, just about how- it's so important to feel like that. Yes. And you don't wanna go home to your house that then drains you further and makes you more stressed out. Yes. Yes, exactly. And again, like, when your space is clear- so is your mind. It really is. And I think that, if everyone in the household can feel responsible of contributing to this clear, clean space- then everything follows. It's like a domino effect, the last thing you wanna be doing when you get home is looking at this closet that you can't even find what you need to wear tomorrow. It's just not, it's not supporting your lifestyle. I saw this quote that said something about just reframing your mind and how you wake up and don't say, "I have to," you say, "I get to." Yeah. And I think that's kind of part of this. Yes. Like, when I'm doing these mundane task, like organizing, it's easy for me to just be like, "Ugh, this is so annoying. I hate doing this stuff." Yeah. And then I have to try to be like, "No, this is, going to help me. I get to do this." Yes. Yes. It's going to make me feel better. And then you see the reels where it's like people go halfway through their closet. They get,, this burst of energy to clean, and then they're, like, sitting in the mess, like changing of the heart. Yes. And you're like, no, you just literally have to get it done because- Yes It lightens you so much when you do that and allow yourself the time to do it. Yes. And it feels like a chore, but it's one of those things that pays off so much- Yes when you do it. Yes, exactly. And I think that is feels really daunting for somebody to do, especially on their own, which is, like, how I love- Why these businesses are, that make a lot of sense. Exactly. But I also think that, if you're not... And also, it this isn't, this is totally a luxury thing, right? Not everyone has the means to have,, an organizer come in and do that. And but I think that you have to start small so that you build momentum, right? Start with a drawer. Start with something like a jewelry box, like something embarrassingly small. My job is okay, I come in, and I totally do this complete overhaul of your closet or your pantry where everything comes out. Like- you don't have to do all of that at that time. Do it, do the top shelf of your pantry. Then you move to the next one. Then you move to the next one. 30 minutes a day will change the whole game for you too. So it is something- that you can do on your own for sure, as we know. 100%. And I liked even your tips before about not even having to go out and get all of the aesthetics things- Yeah 'cause sometimes those are expensive. I go to buy an organizer thing on Amazon, and I'm like, everything is $50. How- And you're like, for me to organize my pantry, it's gonna be $50- Yes. Yes a pantry shelf. Yes. What? All of that is a luxury. It's a luxury. It's a luxury. But you're saying that you can do some of these things- Yes, 100% with very bare minimal- With what you have yes, with what you have. Like- With what you have already. Yes. You can spend $0- And keep your systems organized you can totally do it Right the world of, that we're in wants you to believe that you have to have all of these things Aesthetic of course. And of- w- who doesn't love a gorgeous, all of the, your containers are completely matching? Who doesn't love that? That's beautiful. But I understand that not everyone has the luxury to do that, so you can work totally with what you have. And we're striving for the feeling, and you don't need the feeling- Yes with all of the- It doesn't cost money to get the feeling Yes, exactly. It doesn't cost money to get the feeling. Exactly. Exactly. True. So true. 100%. You don't need to spend a million dollars on containers. Containers are very expensive. They're very expensive, and they add up, too, right? 'Cause it's a $7 container times 100. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so say you have the means, right? And you're like, "This is a worthwhile investment for my family." Yes. And this is something everyone's gonna get on board with, and they want to hire an organizer, you specifically. Take us through that process. What are some of the- Yeah packages that you offer? So basically, the first thing is a, I'll do a consultation, and that's usually a virtual consultation where, you can find that on my website, or you can find it on my Instagram. It's in my bio. It's a, 30-minute consultation, completely free. But basically, I require you to walk me through your space. And from there, I get a good understanding of, like, how big the area is and how much stuff you have, although I never really can tell unless I'm, like, there and actually taking things out. Yeah. But it's a really great start. And then if I need, measurements or any of that stuff I'll get that from the client after. But basically, we walk through what's working and what's not working. And I'm really able to learn what is frustrating the area and what is frustrating you and what is not working with your kids. And I also learn how many people live in your house right now. What are your everyday activities? What does your lifestyle look like? And I'm, like, diagnosing a problem. I'm like, is this a too many things in the house problem? Is this just the system's not really supporting the lifestyle? Are there piles everywhere? I could tell right off the bat- Sort of what the problem is. Is it, do we have a messy partner? Is it the kids don't have enough responsibility? What is the thing? And then from there, depending on how many areas, how big the size, I'll recommend like three packages. I do like a 10-hour, a 25-hour, a 50-hour. It's funny, 'cause like a lot of the times it's always like a medium. It's always like a 25-hour. Sometimes 50, because it does take a long time to do it thoughtfully. Yeah. And I like to make sure that at the end when I leave, I, everything's labeled. Everything has a home. I would hate to leave it like halfway. But so once we lock in, a package, then those hours are yours, and y- And does that include like materials, like the organizational materials too, or is that separate? So that's separate. And what I'll do is I'll send over a custom list. So like your list would look different than your list. There's always like my staples, like- yeah I'm like, I really love like a felt hanger because- they, prevent the clothes from slipping off, and they also are skinny and slim, so they take up less space. There's like a bunch of staple product materials that I'll send over to everybody and you mentioned that like your bags are a problem right now. This is what I would recommend for this problem. From there, they'll check off how many things that they want me to order. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like, Nothing's ever ordered without approval. Some people are like, "I want everything." "I wanna spend... I wanna really go in on this, and I'm, we're gonna do $1,000 in materials," right? And it's "Okay, great. This is it." Some people are like, "I want the bare minimum." "I want whatever's gonna make it look-" Or, "I wanna use what I have." beautiful." Yeah. Try, yeah. "I wanna use what I have." I wanna invest more in your time. Absolutely. I'll be like, I recommend maybe like this... out of this list, if you're gonna do one thing, it's gonna be this, right? I would really recommend- you do this. But materials are like at face cost too. I'm not making any profit on that. But basically from there I will order everything to your house, and sometimes we'll order a little bit more, and we'll return whatever we don't use and then, nobody's charged for that. But basically, those hours are yours, and so we'll get to work. So ev- first thing is like everything comes out. Everything comes out, we go through everything. That's the only time that I require a client to be with me- is through the first like like edit of what the area that we're doing. After that, I know it can get overwhelming, so I'm always like- Now you leave "Go to a coffee shop." So that's when you like literally go and you're saying, "Okay, this stays, this go..." You're going through- Yes sorting. Some people- some people do a purge before- which again like- And maybe on that virtual call, if you think their problem is they have too much stuff- It's like you go through it then you could probably gently say- Try to go through it "I think this is where your problem is." Yes, exactly. "You have too much stuff." So why don't you get started there? And I'll sort of probe almost like for them to come to that conclusion too. And again, like once you're on like a roll of "Okay, I'm donating this I'm maybe keeping this," right? Like, why do we have four lemon juicers, right? Maybe we need one. Maybe we need two. Like how often are you squeezing your lemons? I don't know. Sounds weird. Sounds like that's happened to you before. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm actually pulling from experience. Exactly. Yeah. So but basically what I'll do is, I help go through that purge process. I also... This is maybe more for a closet, but I have five different piles. I have a trash, donate, sell, maybe keep. Ooh, okay. So basically- that's more than I would have thought. But the maybe- That's interesting is my favorite because I don't want people to run into decision fatigue so early on. Yeah. So basically if it's not a keep and it's not a toss, it's a maybe. When you see at the end, and I'm like, "Leave it there until either tomorrow if we're coming back tomorrow," or if it's we'll get to it at the end of the day, everything should be so quick, right? Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. From there, we look at the maybe pile. If it's to the roof, it's okay, I can definitely part with some of these things now. Or it's wait, I actually... maybe the pile's so low that it's like maybe I could keep this, and I'm like I'll revisit it. No, then you see everything that you have. Yeah. Yeah. You see everything you're keeping. You're seeing everything that you're donating, and you're like, okay. So that visual- is really helpful for them to understand but then from there I'm like, "Whatever you would normally be doing today, go do that. Go do that thing. Go get a glass of wine. Go do something for yourself. You're investing in this, which is going to bring you mental clarity. Go do something that's not here in this environment of clutter. From there is when I start putting all the things... it's a big game of Tetris. It's like I'm using all the things that they told me about their lifestyle to make sure that I'm building a system that supports their lifestyle, and then at the same time I'm categorizing. So it's okay, this is more loungewear. This is more, work wear. I think a lot of the reason where it becomes really emotional for people is because there was a version of you that, like- Ugh this system did support, right? Maybe you worked before COVID in the office every day- and so your prime real estate was dedicated to your blazers or to your work wear, versus now it's actually why do, why am I reaching at the top shelf for all my loungewear? Or my elevated loungewear, where I use this every day to, to pick up the kids, or this is what I'm in most of the time. So I think part of it is you're acknowledging the fact that you're not in the season of life anymore. The college crop tops- It's hard, yeah it's I wore this when I met my husband. Yeah. And it's okay, maybe you can keep the crop top- Right but like, get rid of the other crop tops, that you know that you're not wearing. No shame to crop tops, though. But it's like sort of those things where it's if I get rid of this, I'm acknowledging that I'm no longer in this season- Yes of life. It's so hard to do that. So emotional. It's so emotional. And you feel guilty, 'cause you're like- I spent money on this. Yeah. I wore this here. It was gifted to me. My mom gave me this sweater, and it's I haven't worn it in 10 years. Yeah. So it's I think there's so much guilt, which makes it emotional. So clutte- clutter is not physical thing. It's not the physical thing that's clutter. It's like the mail that I have to open but that I haven't really gotten to yet, 'cause I still have some time to get to it. It's the, the returns that I need to go make. Everyone has a returns stash. I have screenshots of QR codes in my camera roll. But it's that's what's happening during the reset. And then every so often, if the client isn't there, I'll send like progress pictures or questions too. Yeah. I'm like, "Hey, we're a little bit tight in this space here. Do you mind if we sometimes they're like, "I'd really like it to be in that one space." If not, it's like no I don't use that at all. We can totally put it in a bin, or we can to- whatever." And then I love to do just like a big reveal at the... I'm like- ...,"Move that, bye." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And and so they come and basically see the final, and it's really it feels like an emotional thing too for them. And the texts that I receive after, it's like, "I had fun getting dressed today." "I had so much fun- That's awesome shopping my closet." Shopping my closet. And everything feels like it's new. Yeah. Yeah. Shopping your closet "I hadn't seen this in so long and I actually love it, and I just couldn't find it." Or, it's "I came home from picking up my, my girls from dance, and I put everything back where I know it goes- Where it belongs and I was able to watch a show." I was able to do that one one checklist item that you had, and then I'm like, "Cool." And she's "So when can you come back- I know to do the garage?" Right. They're like, "When can you come?" 'Cause then once you get... It's it's like a drug. Yes. Once you get a little taste of organizing, you're like, "I gotta organize everything." And you want it everywhere. You want every space to feel that same way- Yeah. Yeah where you get that feeling. Look at all these Roombas you're charging. Yeah. No. Oh, my God, I'm like- Look at all these little Roombas you're charging. All the Roombas. Yeah, everyone's ch- everyone's gonna get charged- Yeah for sure. I love that analogy in my mind, 'cause I feel that so deeply here. There's some days- Yeah when I'm home and I'm like, "Oh, my God, this is so stressful being here in this house." It's loud, it's messy. Your charging dock is not plugged into the wall then. It's chaotic. The charging dock is lost. My Roomba is- Lost currently in my pantry just chilling there. Your Roomba's dead. It's just there. Dead. It doesn't care. And we also, we talked we've had so many different experts and different facets of life on here, right? Yeah. And we talk a lot about- even how to allocate for things like this, and We say even with a house cleaner, for example, that's like somebody who comes in, and I bet you any mom listening would say they pay for a house cleaner, and within 10 seconds- 10 seconds you feel like your house is a mess again. Yes. And so maybe that's not the best- And that's a palatable expense though. Yes. People, I feel like, have come to accept that expense. You're just like, "Sure." You know what I mean? We need- Yes a house cleaner, and we need these things. And- But this seems more like luxury, like high-end, only like the- For sure most elite get- Right a home organizer. But- And that's, but maybe this is something that you can reallocate something. Yeah. Because this just seems- For sure like we keep coming back to this is something that is, yes, it's a luxury if you think about it this way, but it's so important. Long-term also. It's long-term. It can benefit everybody in the household, especially the mom, or especially the parents. Yeah. It- Not just physically But not, if it, right- It's mental emotionally- It's so mental too. Yeah. And mentally, yes, so it's, I think that there's just ways to make things like this work. Yes. And maybe you have to get strategic with how to do it. Mm-hmm. But if we think of everything being a luxury and unattainable- then you really sometimes alienate yourself from being able to have that- happen for you. For sure. I liked that we talked about ways to make this happen without a professional organizer. Yes. We talked about maybe ways that you can reallocate, because this is something that the whole house can function off of. Yes. So maybe it's a splurge, but it's not a luxury that you don't need, right? Correct. It's something that we could allocate money towards. I think this would be, like, a great gift. Yes. Mother's Day gifts. I had Mother's Day- you're like Mother's Day or the... I could see me and my husband, we've, we don't love physical gifts sometimes. We like to do- An experience an experience. Yeah. And so- This is the ultimate experience this is the ultimate experience we go in on this- Yep for our Christmas gift, and instead of doing, going away or doing some- It's like, why don't we live day to day in a happy place- where everyone feels good? Right. What if this feels like- like- a vacation? Yes. Yes. Let's make our- For sure house feel like a vacation. Yes. Or, maybe you don't need the physical gift, and this is something that you can do instead. Yes. It's it seems like- It's like beautiful, wonderful gift to give you reframe. Yes. Yeah, because I think that this is something that would benefit everybody- Yeah if it's done well. Yeah. And something, like T said that is a long-term thing- Yes that... And I'm sure it also teaches, yes, we were talking about it teaching the kids. I was gonna s- But it's also can probably teach you. It's like a habit that's formed, if you see your closets organized, then maybe you do the kids' closets. Then maybe it's not as aesthetic as yours, but it's like- But you're learning you can use the same. You're learning- Exactly and you can apply it to other aspects of your life. Yes. So- I love when people, I'll leave their houses, and they'll send me a new section that they organized, and they're like, "Look at this." It's "I did it." "I got it." It's so exciting. And I was like- Yeah "I love that." Yeah, great. I love that. 'Cause you know they're gonna come back for the big stuff, you know- For sure or if they need help again. But, like- For sure. Or they're like, "My kids are folding now." And I'm like, "I love that." Yeah. 'Cause then, 'cause they're excited. They're like, "This is so cool. I get a drawer for myself in the pantry." The littles are, yeah. Do you have any tips for folding? Oh, my gosh. So I use a folding board that I love. You don't need that. You can fold regularly. I folded regularly all the time. I got this folding board to just expedite it a little bit, and also- does it make it faster? Or does it just make it perfect? Okay. So it makes it perfect every time- in terms of the, so like- So everything's the same? It's all uniform. Everything's the same, and the same size. So it probably makes it easier to go b- to then organize it back in the space. Yes Okay 'Cause like you, you're, so you're like putting like a frame in your drawers, right? And you're just like, "Okay, so like the divider goes here," right? I love a divider. So now that- 'Cause nothing spills over all the T-shirts are this size, so it makes it easier to go back in. Yes. Okay. And then when everything's the same every time, it makes it easier to comb through the same- so you, you are always using everything in your row of- of clothes. So I do love it. I'll, I have the board like linked in my bio. It's from this organizer who created it in in LA. Her name is Corinne. Shout out to Corinne. We'll link it in our show notes. Yeah, we'll link it for you. Cool. Yeah, she's she's amazing, and she's an organizer in California. She has, this folding board, and she created like a mini one too. I love it. I'm sure that there's many, and I'm sure you can probably grab... I love this one. But yes, to your point, it just, like everyone learns that there's a peace associated with having a system organized and in place and a home for everything, so it just again, trickles into every other aspect- of your life. Yeah. But the perfectly folded shirt is the last step. You have to come up with the system first. Yes. So sometimes I think like you start backwards, or for me, I start backwards. Biggest mistake you can make- You know? is like buying bins first. Ugh. Yeah. Biggest mistake. I, and again, I- 'Cause then you're trying to cram your system into a bin that doesn't even fit. And I always go back to I always s- I'm always like, I'm chronically online at this point. Yep. It's my job. Yeah. And so I feel like when I start seeing the like January resets and everyone's linking their bins and you feel this "Oh, I should be- Yes getting all this stuff to organize- Yes and then to your point, that's a waste. Yes. That's not, because you don't know that's actually gonna work for your drawer- Exactly for your life. Even the dividers, like I require people to send me measurements first, 'cause I'm like I would hate to, or get you a divider that doesn't close- and again, like I recommend the materials before getting to somebody's house- because I know what I'm gonna need. But if you're doing this on your own, I would recommend the first thing you always do is to literally remove everything. Edit. That's like my reset method- Yeah is remove everything- Yep go through everything, edit- and then basically from there you're categorizing everything. You're categorizing, you're putting into like your piles of okay, this is all loungewear again, like this is PJs, whatever. And then your last one is putting it back and like systematizing everything. But it's those three steps that I would say are so important. I would- Do you have a place where you like to donate things to or resell to? Yeah, good point. Sometimes. 'Cause part of your job is- Yeah removing things from people's homes. Yeah. Sometimes if I don't have- a person to give to. Actually, like I have four bags of clothes right now- Yeah for Christina. And if she doesn't want them, like for her daughter- yeah. Yeah I'm going to give them to the Goodwill. Yes. Because I need them out. Yep. Do you have good places t- that you would then- Yeah tell a person like, "Okay, you have these piles." Yes. "They need to get out of your house." Yeah. Otherwise- Where do they go? they're just in the basement- Yeah. In clutter. Yeah. So- do you suggest places? So if it's just donations, I do Goodwill a lot, but I do love it's the VA where they do pickups for you. Okay. And so I love that because it's so convenient because they come and they get it and then they take it, and I don't think they take furniture and stuff. But I'm talking about like household items- Okay and like smaller items. And clothing or- Yes. Okay. Clothing. And they'll take all clothing. But basically it's the VA. They'll come. You can schedule a pickup. Mm-hmm. They'll get everything for you, so you don't even need to put it in your trunk, 'cause also- Wow there's like the trunk saga. Oh, forget it. That's like- We're gonna live in the trunk for the next month. Mine will live in the trunk. Forever. Yeah. Yep. So basically Goodwill, the VA. And then if w- if we're talking about selling- 'cause that's like a whole other thing. So there's The RealReal. Yeah. Which like- Yep I think a lot- I've done that before too. So a lot of people just become a little frustrated because you pay a lot for this, and then the commission structure- You do is- You don't make a lot it's not- very beneficial- unless it's like a shoe or a handbag or something like that- then it is. But- A lot of clothing items don't resell well. No. But no, they don't, and I know that if you do like a Poshmark or something, then you're the load on you- You have to list off everything, and then everything has to sit. And it has to sit. That's the worst. You're not getting it out. That's the worst. So no, e- exactly. And then you have to ship it when it actually sells. And then you have to go and find it. And it was for that. So again, you need a whole system- Whole system for that just for selling stuff. Exactly, which is- 'Cause you need to be organized a lot. You need to know where that is. It has to be pulled. Yes. It has to be- Exactly it's just another pile. It is. Some people are great at that. I personally am not. I'd rather actually just donate it and- Yeah and call it a day. Yeah. The RealReal though, you can schedule pickups- and they'll pick it up for you, which is nice. So at least if you're gonna, if you're, don't wanna go the Poshmark way or a Facebook Marketplace way- you can have somebody come. And then it's just great 'cause they just do everything for you. But the other thing too is that I know that there's a newer company that is around. It's called Rent With Rev, and basically you can shop like influencer closets. And so it's really great because- You can, and I'm probably speaking from a buyer standpoint, but you're able to rent your favorite influencer closets. And but I'm pretty sure that you can also send some of your occasion wear and resort wear to them, and you're also, you're making a continuous commission- Oh, that's nice on those items. Cool. So you're not just getting this, like- Right $8 from like- a Staud dress that- you bought for like- Right 400. All right, so VVA- Yeah is the pickup that you can schedule. Yes. And I think it's the Vietnam Veterans donation pickup partnership. That's the one. Yep. We'll put that in the show notes. Yep. I've also done thredUP before when they send you- Yes, I've done thredUP too Good a giant bag. I send the bag. And then you just throw everything in the bag. Oh. Load it in. That's a great tip, too- Honestly 'cause I just did that I've gotten $130- Amazing from that bag. Amazing. It's worth every penny. Oh, my God, I totally forgot. Th- so there's another one called Trashy. Trashy. Trashy? Okay. T-R-A-S-H-I-E. Okay. This is a donation subscription. They send you a bag, and all you have to do is drop it off at UPS or something. Oh, my gosh. Oh. And I'm pretty sure they recycle a lot of the clothing as well, so it's good for the environment- Yeah and then it's also getting it off your hands without- Great. Oh, I love that. And then I like that- Yes if it, if you have a subscription bag come- Subscription it's a reminder of, like- To do it again d- and it's a reminder of like- That's actually one of my- ..."Okay, here we go" it's one of my favorites. Yes. It's really good. 'Cause that's what I do with thredUP. I actually order several bags at a time. Yes. And I do the recycle option where anything- Yes that they don't want, they just recycle. Yes. And but when I order the bags, I then always have bags because I'll fill them and I get rid of them. Yes. And then I'll always end up having one or two extra. Yes. And then when I'm like, "Okay, I don't know what to do with this stuff," I throw it in the bag and it goes. Throw it in the bag. Exactly. It's in my trunk, but it goes. And that's like- Yeah Trashy, it's $20 for the largest bag that they offer. Yes. Yep. Cool. Yeah. And again, it's, yes, it's another subscription. I think the idea is that it's something that is reminding you that every so often- to get rid of it. Yes, exactly. Yes. To do the edit. And people always ask me "How often do you recommend people go through things?" They're like- That's a good question. How often do you go to Target? If you go to Target once a week, then you need to go through your things once a week, right? Thank you. Exactly. Like- How often- So is it one to one? Is it something comes out? I love a one in, one out- Okay rule to, to maintain it. Yeah, to maintain. But if you're talking about okay, this actually needs some sort of real editing- Yeah I love a good purge. I'm talking everything comes out thing- Yeah six months. Oh, okay. Ooh. Wow. Yeah. That's aggressive. Of an area? But I know. Yeah. Yes, but I know that's unrealistic for a lot of people. Yeah. But what I like to do is 30 minutes a week. Okay. Go through a drawer. Go, I'm talking one tiny drawer. Yeah. It's just about a refresh and everything. It's, it's your hair drawer. It's your makeup drawer. Am I really using all this stuff? Yeah, why do I have five hair- I have five hair dryers. This palette has got to be expired. Why? There's no way. There, there's just no way But I'm talking a little section and 30 minutes is nothing, right? 30 minutes of scrolling time. That's when you can put on a podcast- Right. Right and listen to us- Yeah and then- Exactly and then do a little reset. Put a podcast in your ear. Yes. Shameful plug. Yes. Yeah. No, put a podcast on- That's when I do it and just j- exactly. Yeah. Exactly. The- future you will thank you. And I think that's the key little habits are gonna make your h- like, your life so much- easier the next day. Going- to sleep with a messy kitchen, you're gonna wake up overstimulated already. I know. Yep. So it's every night before I go to sleep, like- You do the reset kitchen, kitchens are wiped. The throw blankets are put away. Yep. And- Future you will thank you and you will wake up to a great day. This is- I love that this was so inspiring on so many levels. I also think that you started this while you were working. We always have- Yes people that are trying to reset, right? Their- Yeah lives, especially- Yeah moms, right? You have kids, and you really rethink your whole world and, where you wanna be spending your time. And- Yeah I c- often get asked about starting something while you currently have something. And- Yes this is also very inspiring that way, too, because you were working full time, and then you also started this business out of something you were passionate about. Yes. So I think that's just very inspirational to anybody listening, that you can take a little something that you like to do- Yeah and make a business out of it. And here you are, and not only are you thriving in this business- Yeah you were able to leave your old business, and- Yeah now this is what you do full time, which is so- I know exciting. I know. You said you started it to pay for your wedding. You're getting married in a few months. I know. I know, it's been the craziest time. And now this is your full-time job. You have a huge social media presence too. This is great. Social media itself is a job. Oh, I'm trying. So good for you. Yes. No, you are. I'm trying so much. It's amazing. Yeah. I'm, I'm trying, and I think that for anyone who's trying to figure out what to do next or something that, like... 'Cause I, I loved my job, but I don't think I was fulfilled with it. And I don't know the s- You hear that a lot. People light you up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And so it was something that I, again, started on the side because it was, like, an actually for us to make cash just- Yeah for this wedding. Yeah. And the second thing was, like, I realized very quickly how much I was fulfilled by it because it was also- Sort of changing a lot of, and it sounds so silly, like it's a closet that I'm organizing- It's changing lives but it's really changing at least like a me- like, it's taking some sort of mental load off of somebody which felt really fulfilling to me. And it quickly- You're helping someone sort of like grew and- it was so huge for word of mouth and posting on socials and- like really trying to be relatable and- Yeah putting myself out there, too, 'cause I, that's the other thing, too. Putting yourself out on social media is such a crutch for people, too. Even s- even me I'm like, "Oh my gosh," "People are gonna see this." But it's like you have to. You have to do it. You have to do it. You have to put yourself out there. You have to go for it. And there's you see the benefits of it shortly after. Yeah. And it just, I hope it gets people's wheels turning. Obviously if you love organizing- Yes it's like put yourself out there and, like- Yeah you can make some side cash o- about, doing something that- For sure you're good at and that you like doing. But maybe- Yeah if you don't, just get your wheels turning if you're looking to- Yeah make a change, if you want some side cash because the world's expensive. Like- yes there are ways to do this, and people do it. I lo- I just always love having people on- Yeah that talk through that story because it's so interesting- Yeah and very inspiring. I will say I worked towards it very slowly- but surely. And it in my situation it, it propelled very quickly which was amazing. But I started off where I was like I posted on a Facebook moms group and I said, here are some pictures of my friends' closets that I did." So I did a bunch of my friends' closets 'cause I needed content. You to- yep, you took the pictures. So I was like, "Hey- Yep I'm gonna organize my-" The receipts. Then I did my brother and- Yep sister-in-law. Yep. I did my aunt, I did the, her kids. Yep. So I had about five or six areas that I was sharing. That's it was- Yeah just that. That's great. And I posted it on a Facebook moms group and I said, "Hey, I'm launching this business. Here's some of my work. I'm giving out five free closets," right? Wow. And so many moms were like, "As long as you're not a serial killer, please- Yeah come by- Yeah tomorrow." And then there- And I was like, "Great" and then that's word of mouth. And if you are, like, yep. And if you are- that's fine. And then when you come in and rescue a mother- Yes. Yeah you bet your ass she is going to tell every human she knows- She's like- about this "The Rolexes and maybe a few Chanel bags were missing- Yes. but, like- Moms I couldn't even tell- Yeah, you're like, "I don't care" you're such a mess." Yeah. It's like My Friends and Neighbors, the show. Yeah. Yes. I don't know if anybody's watching. I've, of course. Imagine. I know now I'm like, "Oh my God- Yeah I hope people are, like, not thinking that I would do- No oh my gosh. No. No. But it's it's so funny 'cause moms are, like, the backbone of the world. The moms just handle everything, like the ability to multitask- And like even this business, is run by moms. Like my business relies on all of my moms out there who are just like I'm doing so much and I just need help." We need help, yeah. Like it's never that they're not capable. It's that they have so much that they're already doing, and it's like the second I have free time, like this is the last thing I wanna be doing. It's never that they're not capable. It's always like I don't have time to do this well and thoughtfully, and when I do, it's actually I don't wanna do it at all. But that's like I s- I, I did the five free closets and from there it was "Hey, like my sister actually could use your help. Could you help me do this?" And then I was like, I didn't have marketing dollars to like put ads out there or anything. You need it. So I was like, I'm gonna reach out to a flu- a few influencers and, s- exchange for like- a reel or something. Content, yeah. Yep. And that I still do. Every probably like month or so, I try to make a relationship with an influencer. Mm-hmm. And I'm just like, "Hey, I'd love, to do a section of your home." And in exchange for some content that just feels natural. It's whatever you think is gonna land well with your audience, and I'll give, a service in exchange for some social media. And it's really, like, how I've grown my business. And it's- It's so interesting. I appreciate your transparency. I always love hearing that. Totally. Yeah. But it, it wasn't like... I didn't have a bunch of do- Like I started from the ground up. I was like, "I have to"- You started because you were trying to make money. You're a hustler. Yeah. Oh, my God, my- Yeah. Feet hurt so much. I was like, "My back hurts. I've been standing all day." But it was, like, so rewarding, 'cause I was like- Yeah I'm building something important to me. Yeah. And I didn't have here's, $25,000 to put into this business, get a bunch of assistants, get it into branding. I made my logo on Canva. Yeah. I, s- started with all my friends- You can do it and family. Yep. I, did so many free closets in the beginning. That's how the best businesses are made. Yep. Yeah. And I'm like, I hope to, continue to build my social and be able to travel and do this. You said you're growing. You're looking to even hire some people- Yes potentially- Ooh because you're growing so much. Yes. Yes. I'd love to hire an assistant if you're looking. If you're brunette. She- Yes. No. You can be blonde or anything. She can be dirty blonde. Yeah. Yeah, you can be dirty blonde. She can be dirty blonde. You have to wear a wig actually when you're on the job. Willing, willing to color your hair exactly. Reset Blondie, I'm looking for you. Yep, exactly. Yeah. So- Maybe. But yeah, I'd love to, to hire an assistant to help me with projects in Connecticut, in New York. I love it. Yeah. So- I love it. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah. And I also love when people are like T said, open about sharing the ins and outs of their businesses. Absolutely. Because it's, I feel like it's just so helpful and inspiring, and this was such a great conversation. But what we cannot let you go without- No you sharing a pink spotlight. So Christine and I close out every episode- Okay. Yeah, sure with me share a person, place, thing, tip, mantra, experience, anything making your life a little better today. So sometimes we share something- yeah that happened to us. Sometimes we share a product. We always just like- Yeah close out with sharing one thing. So we can let you, like- Sit on that for a second if you want. We can share What about you, T? Why don't you share yours? You have one- I'm sharing a product that my sister got me for Mother's Day. Okay. I have two sisters. My youngest sister, Marissa, just bought a house in October. You would be obsessed with her because she- Yeah like, when she was little, we thought she had, like- She reminds me of her. I thought that we thought she had clinical- Yeah OCD because she had everything- Yeah just right. And my mom went back. My mom was home with me and my middle sister. She worked part-time when, by the time she got to my baby sister, who's 25, 26 now- Yeah she went back to work full-time. So my dad raised her 'cause he worked from home. The best. And my dad is amazing, but he's not like a mom who's does everything for you. Yeah. My dad would just get up, and my sister would have the keys, the phone, everything. "Okay, Dad, it's time to go." Or she's just very responsible. Yeah. So she had us over to her house for Mother's Day. She had a Mother's Day brunch. Her house is perfect. She's so sweet. Nothing is out of order. Oh, I love that. Everything is perfection. The cof- you didn't have to ask her, like- Her new house, too. Oh do you have extra paper? Everything is just perfectly organized. She had a beautiful Mother's Day brunch. Yeah. So she got me, my mom, and my other sister. She got the four of us matching gifts. And- Oh they're these cute bracelets. Oh. Oh my gosh. Birthstones. And they have our birthstones on them. Oh, how beautiful. For the four of us. Isn't that so cute? That is beautiful. That is such a beautiful gift. I know. And I feel like they- Oh my gosh they make a very beautiful gift. So the brand is Mint Lily. Mint Lily. So they make customized gifts. So beautiful. They also sell Mint Lily on Nordstrom. Oh, okay. They, the price point is great. These are $49. Wow. What a great gift and- And it means something, too. Yes. It's like a meaningful- It means something to me. And I like to wear gold jewelry, but I don't usually add color to my jewelry stacks. Yeah. But they're very muted. I think this is a terrific gift to give, like- Beautiful a grandma, a mom- It's so pretty like a sister. Yeah. I could get these and have my own kids' birthstones in them. Yes. Yeah. Oh, I love that. And I just love- What a nice find seeing the four of us. Thank you, Marissa. Oh, I love that. That was a great gift. I know, I'm like, my birthdays are coming up. I'm gonna have a lot of birthdays. We were gonna get tattoos. We were gonna get tattoos. Yeah. And we were gonna do something with circles like, shape filled in based on- Yeah what number and line we are. Oh. But we all chick- we all tur- we all chickened out. And my mom was like, "A tattoo? I don't know, girl." Be like, "You could take the bracelet." Yeah. "Do you feel like a tattoo, girl?" "Do you think I should do it?" Oh my gosh. And my husband was like, "You're gonna get a tattoo? 40 years old, you're gonna get a tattoo again?" Oh. I'm like, "I don't know. Maybe." Yeah, I will. He's "Where are you gonna put it?" I'm like, "On my face. Where do you think I'm gonna put it?" Yeah. On my ass where nobody can see it. Yeah, exactly. So thank you, Marissa, for- so beautiful maybe she should come work for you. Yeah. It sounds like you have a lot of people- Yeah in your family- I have a couple people who'd be really- We have a lot of people lined up. Great but anyways, I digress. Yeah. What's your pink spotlight? Okay, so mine was I went away for f- my 40th birthday trip with some of my girlfriends from college. We're both 40 this year, in case you didn't- We're both turning 40 this year you have to do something big and glamorous. My husband actually was like laughing because he's "Wait a minute. So did you celebrate your 40th birthday earlier?" I don't turn 40 till July, but like it's like the birthday has already started to, it's like- I feel like the birthday is- I'm like, "No, it's the year." It's the year. It's the year. You're like, "We didn't celebrate yet." It's the year. I'm like, "Don't worry, you didn't miss anything." But- Yep yeah, I started ce- celebrating my 40th birthday- I know early. Went away with my college girlfriends, got fried on a boat. Fried. Like I, and I would, I covered myself from head to toe with SPF, and I- I was even like wearing my coverup because I was like, "Oh, I am going to burn." Burn. Burn. Crispy. So I burned every single place I didn't like reapply 77 times. So you had like little So there was just like on the side of my hip, on the lower- Yeah part of my back, right above my like bikini. Oh. Like just the little, crispy. Yeah, like the sensitive part of like your cleavage. Yeah. Just the little nooks and crannies. Just the little nooks and crannies. And I was like, oh, like we were all joking because it was not only just me. Everybody else fried. But I was like the most covered and I still fried. Anyway, I get back home, I'm like, "This is not good." No. And I pulled out a body oil that I had, 'cause I was like, I started moisturizing and nothing would even, I felt like it was just sitting. And I was like, nothing was even working. So I pulled out this body oil from my trusty Colleen Rothschild. I love all of her face stuff. It's like my skincare line. And I had a body oil that I had never tried before, and it's called The Ritual Body Oil, and I applied it- Oh, I've heard of that night and day, just like I just- Yeah kept going over those spots. And first of all, the redness disappeared within maybe- Ooh a day and a half. Thank God. It was like gone. And my skin, no peeling, n- especially on my chest where I was like, "I am definitely gonna peel." Nothing. It was like, it must have been filled with all the good stuff. So I was like, "Okay, this is my pink spotlight." I know. I wonder what the science behind it is, that it didn't- It was just like- have to be like- extra moisturizing Extra moisture yeah. There was also, is it the reishi, r- reishi or reishi mushroom? I think that's for- Oh like inflammation. There was like- Wow a bunch of different things, and I feel like it attacked at like different things. It works. It was like removing the redness, removing the inflammation, removing the itchiness that you get. So another plug for my Colleen Rothschild, 'cause I love their stuff. Yeah. I'm gonna need that. But yeah. I want the link. What about you? You have one to share? I know. Okay. Last but not least. Yes. So I was like, do I go product, or do I go like experience? You can go whatever. I think I'm gonna go- You can do whatever you want experience. Go for it. But so my whole shtick is reset, right? Like reset, reset. If you walk into my house, like beware, you may walk into me like resetting something. But I think when I think about the brand and like what it started definitely as like more like the physical of, removing items in your closet that no longer fit you or that- were in, from a previous season of your life. Or like that sweater that I might wear one day for this one occasion that probably never comes around. But then it slowly developed into me seeing how like it is so much more about resetting your space to reset your mind and reset your energy, and it became much more of an emotional thing that was tied to the brand. So when I think about the reset brunette- I think less about how it is more physical and how it's so much more emotionally and mentally freeing. And so I guess my thing is like reset your space so that you are keeping genuine friendships, genuine systems that work for your lifestyle and that support your lifestyle, and remove the things that don't, and remove the things that add pressure. Especially for women, you have this pressure to be perfect, and I think that comes from a lot of what we see online, and I think that comes, with- A lot of things that we see on the surface from our friends and our communities and stuff when we actually all have similar problems when we come home and we are unable to recharge our mental. And it's because of the environment that we're in. And so my thing is, reset. Keep the genuine friendships, the relationships, the systems, the, the things that only support your mental clarity- Yeah and, release all of the pressures of being perfect and having to live up to this expectation. Because I think a lot of the times women don't need to be perfect. They need the permission to make their life lighter. And so I think ultimately that's what the Reset Brunette has become about. It's resetting- Reset is such a powerful word your life. Yeah. It's resetting your mental and your emotional- Yeah and- I feel like I should be able to use my HSA card for this service- Yes that you're gonna provide me- Yes because it's, like- This is a therapy session so mental. Bill day. Oh my gosh, yes. Pippa's got some free therapy today. So- oh my gosh. Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you for having me. Thank you for being here. I had so much fun. We loved having you here, and we hope to see you in our homes and hopefully some of our local- I would love that Pippas. Yes. And then if you don't- Yes if you're not in Connecticut or you're not local in New York or surrounding areas- Yeah she has a fantastic Instagram account, so you guys can follow. Thank you. Lots of tips and lots of before and afters, and just- Thank you great Instagram presence, so it's exciting to follow there. Can't wait. But can you tell everyone where to find you? Yes. So I am resetbrunette on Instagram. Easy. And I think the... Oh, and on TikTok as well. Mm-hmm. It's, it's about, you know, sort of giving yourself the ability to feel lighter in all of the aspects of your life. I love that. I love that. Well said. We'll end on that note. Yeah. Thank you for being here. Thank you. Oh my gosh, I had so much fun. Yay. And- I'm like, let me see if anybody's having a baby. We- Oh, I know. Yeah. Do we have any update before we close out? No baby? No baby. No baby. Okay. So no baby, but we'll keep our followers- updated- Oh my gosh for social next week. Yeah, like not yet. Not yet. Okay. All right. We will see you all next week. Okay, bye. Bye, everybody. Yay.