“Sweet Turns N2 Smoke Quickly”

The rush feels real, the signals look right, and then—almost without warning—the sweetness turns to smoke. We’ve both been there, and today we name the pattern, map the exits, and show how to stop returning to what keeps burning you. Using the burning building as a vivid metaphor, we unpack why chemistry can hijack your senses, how flattery imitates care, and why nostalgia, comfort, and low self-esteem make “one more time” feel inevitable. Together, we separate lust from love in practical terms, so you can tell the difference between a spark that warms and a fire that consumes.

We talk honestly about red flags we rationalize, the years lost to relationships that had no purpose, and the real cost of staying: peace, time, and self-respect. You’ll hear how validation cravings blur judgment, why comfort is a counterfeit safety, and how to reclaim clarity with simple, repeatable moves. We share the mantra “your worth is non-negotiable” and ground it in action—boundary-setting, no-contact windows, rescue routines that replace old rituals, and a written plan for the moment the alarms go off. If your heart keeps defending danger, this is your mandated evacuation notice.

There’s hope on the other side of smoke. We offer language, tools, and lived experience—addiction, relapse, escape, and recovery—to help you step out with strength. Expect withdrawal, expect nostalgia, and expect to win anyway. Press play to learn how to trust what the signs are telling you, use your inner fire extinguisher, and choose a steady life built on peace, purpose, and self-worth. If this conversation speaks to you, subscribe, share it with someone who needs the exit map, and leave a review to help others find their way out.

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Transcript

From Sweet To Smoke

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Sweet can turn to smoke quick. Sweet can turn to smoke quick, quickly. Uh in the in a s with the snap of a finger, with the blink of an eye. What appears to be sweet, what appears to taste sweet, what feels sweet, what smells sweet, what sounds sweet, what looks sweet, it can turn to smoke quickly. It can turn to smoke quickly. Many relationships, they start off sweet, but they end in smoke. In other words, there's uh where uh that that relationship, that that thing, that fire that was kindled, it begins to fade, it begins to dwindle. Um, that person disappears. There's no longer that intimate connection. Um, they're not interested in you, or you're not interested in them uh like you were in the beginning. And so sweet can turn to smoke very quickly. Uh, we've been talking about this, and um, we are here just to uh uh help you to remind you that your word is non-negotiable. When we say sweet fire, sweet fire the podcast, again, our mantra being how to survive the flame when what attracts you burns. I'm gonna repeat that how to survive the flame when what attracts you burns. We're here uh uh to remind you of your worth. We are here to help you to understand um that you are worth it, your worth is non-negotiable. Oh my goodness. Will you say that with me? It's always good when we have a reinforcement, of course, behind what we say. When more than one person uh agrees, but when we have more than one, we have two that can agree and say your worth is non-negotiable. All right, I'm your host, Dr. Lydia Michelle Young. I'm here with my co-host, none other than Intercessor Janine Nicole. We're here in the studio, uh, and we want to share with you. We're picking up uh where we left off on last week, talking about that burning building being a metaphor for a relationship that has no purpose, a relationship that is not intended for your life, that that addictive relationship. That addictive relationship. I like how it uh began. First of all, good evening, everyone, and thank you for tuning in to another episode of Sweet Fire the podcast. I like uh how it began. Um how sweet sweet can turn into smoke very quickly. Sweet can turn into smoke very quickly, and I know for myself, I can definitely relate to that as well as many others out there. You know, you you start off in a relationship, it just seems so exciting, it seems so fun, it's brand new, you're getting to know one another, and then before you know it, that sweetness of that of the newness of that relationship, it just turns into smoke. It's like, what happened? What if the excitement, you know, go? How come I don't like to be around this person as much? How come I don't, you know, I'm not upset if I if if they don't call me like they used to call? You know, I I'm able to just be comfortable with spending the weekend by myself. I'm no longer, you know, trying to make the plans to go over here, go over there to spend time with that one for an entire weekend. Why? Because it has turned into smoke, and it can happen so quickly. It can happen so quickly that sweetness turned into smoke. But you know what I found out in my life? I was the one that that kept going back. I was the one that kept going back. I needed to see one more time, I needed to touch one more time, I needed to feel, I needed to hear, I needed to smell, I needed to taste one more time. I needed this, I needed it one more time. Or can I say one last time? Right because we talked about that. There's many who wanted to go back one more time, they wanted to re-enter the burning building that they had the opportunity to escape. They wanted to, they had a desire. The desire was so strong that they made up in their minds, they contemplated, but they decided to return to that burning building, to that relationship, to that situation, to that addictive habit, to that drug addiction, to that alcoholism, to that deception, to the lies, to the jealousy, to the give me, help me, to they decided to return to that place, to that point, to that position in their life where they were caused much pain, where they were very disappointed, where they were abused, where they were mistreated, where they were overlooked, where they were talked down at, where they were called names, where they were ignored. Many people decide to return because the senses are hijacked. Right. The senses are hijacked. It's it's at that moment when we allow weakness to take the lead. Now you jump in on that. Yeah, the weakness to take the lead. I I like what preceded that also. The senses are hijacked. Right. That's exactly why. That's why you know a relationship can go from uh uh to being sweet to smoky very quickly. Why? It was because the senses were hijacked, you know, and when those senses are hijacked, people oftentimes confuse that with being love. And it's not love, right? You know, your senses were hijacked. That person looked good to you, that person smelled good to you, that person's voice was alluring, that person spoke those words to keep drawing you in. That person had the right amount of finances to fund, you know, the fun. You know, the senses were hijacked, and it's when those senses are hijacked, that's the cause, the root cause of what you know, uh what causes that relationship to immediately go from sweet to smoky. And that's why so many people, Doctor, they they can fuse, you know, those emotions for love. And that's not love. Right, absolutely, and that's not love. And while you were talking, I was hearing the word lust. Right. Because I mean it can easily be mistrescrewed, it can easily be mistaken, the sound of that of the voice can, you know, it's like our ears being hijacked. We're hearing, and it sounds right, and it sounds good, but it it's not what it sounds like. It's not what it appears to be. We talked about the force behind the eyes, the force behind the touch that comes to trap us, that comes to distract us, that comes to detour us, that comes to get us caught up in a way that really where our lives are in danger, our hearts are in danger, our minds are in danger, our soul, our very soul is in danger. Why? Because there's a hijacking that has gone on with our senses. It may feel good, but is it love or am I just am I attracted to the lust? Right. I can I can't, I just can't get enough. And that's what that's the danger in it. And when we do that, we are creating a cost that our hearts, a cost that our minds, our souls, our well-being, uh, a cost that we cannot afford to pay. Right. We can't afford that. We can't afford what it cost. And as you were speaking, as you were speaking, you know, uh um, just because a person says what you want to hear, just because a person says what you want to hear, it doesn't necessarily mean that you're in love with them. It's artificial, it's artificial. They're just saying what you are wanting to hear. You know, a lot of people, um, and I I can speak from experience, you know, when you are one who deals with low self-esteem, when you deal with insecurities, right? And then somebody comes along and they're saying what you've been wanting to hear, you know, for so many years, that oftentimes get confused as being, you know, love. And it's not love. You know, your soul was longing for somebody to come and validate you. That doesn't mean that it's love. Right. You know, and this is again the importance because, you know, like we talked about when we kicked off this series, um, you know, the answer on uh how to avoid, how to stay away from the burning building is to find your worth, to value you. You know, and and a lot of people, unfortunately, they look for another to validate them. They look for another, you know, to uh uh uh to help them identify their worth. Right. And again, that's where the confusion comes in with confusing, you know, uh uh love for confusing lust for love. And you and you said something intercessor about um years. The year years accumulate, years go by. I mean, years, umpteen, if I can say years, years and years and years and years in this type of relationship that was not again intended for you. Right, a relationship that serves your life, no true purpose. None. I mean, years and years and years, and you've seen the red lights from the beginning. You've you run into red lights along the way, you hit dead ends, you come to brick walls, you've been be uh stuck between a rock and a hard place. You've seen all the signs, you've seen the exit signs and ignored them. Right. And and and and you found a way around those dead ends, you found a way around the pit stop. That's why the years have accumulated. Right. Because you can't, uh you, you, there's you you're allowing weakness to take the lead. Right. And we're here to encourage you today, to empower you today. Uh that that, like you said, uh intercessor, I think, I believe it was last week that uh use your fire extinguisher. What does that mean when you're in this metaphor burning building that pertains to addictive uh relational situations, people, relationships, intimacy, drugs, alcoholism. What else are people? Food. I mean, come on. It's alcoholic addictions, yeah. Whatever it may be in your life. I know what my my thing was. So things that I've dealt with in my life, um, relationships, let's just put it out there. I've had some issues with being in intimate relationships, addictive. You know, I allowed God allowed me to escape uh the burning building many times. And and then I decided I just I cannot return. And I but I survived it. And we talked about this as well. Many people don't survive, you know. I've survived drug addiction. I was addicted to crack cocaine, off and on for years. I kept going back to that burning building, to that, you know, it drew me, it called me. I heard it called my name. I chased it. I chased it, you know, but I was able to survive that so that I can sit here today and share with you that you can survive that burning building. You can plan your escape. When you see the red light, you know it means stop. When you hit a dead end, you know that you can't go any further. When you come to a pit stop, you know that's it. When your back is up against the wall. I mean, we we witness a situation, oh, it's so interesting. Um, that a situation where some we can't mention many names, but it was like, here's your wake-up call. This is your wake-up call. Your life was just could have been gone just like that. Not just one party, but both of them. Right. Right? When when you hear your purpose calling, when you hear a voice, or I'm gonna say the voice drawing you, calling you, pulling on you, really trying to rescue you and help you and strengthen you. Again, your fire should fire extinguisher being your strength. I forgot that. Your fire extinguisher, use that, it's the strength that you have within. You're stronger than you know, you're stronger than you believe you. I'm gonna stop right there. Come on, jump in. Yeah, you're stronger than uh you know, um, and hence burning building. Burning building. A burning building is gonna what? It's just gonna go down. A burning building is gonna fall apart, a burning building is doomed to be doomed. You know, a burning building cannot stand. So it and it's it's it's unfortunate because you mention a lot, along with uh everything that you mentioned, why people you know stay in these relationships for umpteen years, it's also that C-word of comfortability, getting so comfortable with being with that connection that you know that you should not be with, that connection that does not value you, that connection that does not, you know, uh uh uh uh uh again value you that doesn't speak up of your worth. You know, people become so comfortable in the toxic relationship. You know, people come become so comfortable in that drug addiction because that drug addiction ignumbs them, you know, for an amount of time. People become so uh uh uh comfortable with that drink because that drink does the same thing. The drink is also a form of a drug. It's numbing, it's a numbing factor. But that's all that numbing factor is also is your burning building, it's going to eventually fall down, it's going to collapse. It's gonna go up in smoke, it's gonna go up in smoke. And when smoke dissipates, what are you gonna see? Nothing but ashes. That's it. That's it. What a waste. I didn't mean to jump in. No, that's it. What a waste. It's it's yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's true. So I'm hearing this, it's true. We have to have a story to tell, so that's why we do have experiences. We have to have a story to tell. A lot of people call them testimonies. Um, we have to have a testimony, we have to have experience so that we can gain strength, so that we can uh, you know, have knowledge and by knowledge, uh apply that by using wisdom, right, you know, to help to not help just to strengthen and better our lives, but to be a help in the earth for other people. So it's true. Uh but there I heard this while we were preparing uh for this, um, that for some of you there is a mandatory evacuation going on in your life. There's a mandatory evacuation going on. I asked the question within myself, why do why do people refuse to evacuate with this mandatory? Right? Why do people choose to to not evacuate when they know they're in danger? Why do people choose to stay when they know that danger is on the rise or when they know that danger is in the vicinity, when they know that their lives are in trouble? Why do they refuse? A lot of people refuse to leave. Yeah. They want to stay. Why? Why do they want to stay? Because of emotional attachment to things, right, to people, to the memories, to the memories. Um in the in the case of relation to lies and deception, and many people think they can survive it. No, I can survive this storm, I can survive this fire, I can survive this relationship. Yes, she's abusive, yes, he's abusive, but I'm surviving, I can survive it. I'm okay. I can change him. I can change her. Yeah. Yeah. And they really believe that they can defend themselves. Some of you really believe that you can defend yourself because you're still here, but the building is burning. And so we want to admonish you today, like we did last week. Yes. Again, hear us clearly. Um, plan your escape. Plan your escape so you can live. Plan your escape to leave so you can live because you're worth it. You are worth it. Don't defend the danger that your heart may be in. Don't defend the danger that your mind, your heart, your life, your body, your everything that's important to you may be in. Don't defend the danger. Don't defend the person. I know it's hard, it's difficult to expose or to tell the truth about some things. And maybe you don't need to speak on it. Maybe you just need to plan. But don't allow weakness uh to pull you back. Don't return to that burning building. And that's all I have. What interesting? Yeah, exactly. Don't return to the burning building, value you like we have said. You know, you are worth it. Love you, love you. That burning building is is soon to come down. That burning building does not value you. That burning building wants to take you out with it. Love you too much to remain in that burning building. Because we do care and we do love you and we appreciate you. Uh be strengthened. Peace be to you, peace be your house, be to your house, and peace be to all you.