“The Danger of Daydreaming”

One quiet danger can undo a loud victory: letting your mind drift back to what once destroyed you. We’re talking to survivors who overcame the attack, left the toxic relationship, put down the bottle, or walked away from the chaos and still feel that subtle pull to return. When daydreaming turns into rumination, cravings, or nostalgia, it’s not harmless. It can become a relapse risk.

We unpack what it means to “keep your mind” in unhealthy spaces and why that threatens your current peace. You’ll hear us connect the dots between thoughts and behavior: replaying an ex can lead to that text, rehearsing a craving can lead to that drive, and looping old words can poison your confidence even when nobody else hears them. We name the “mental loop” for what it is, a repeat track that holds you captive until you interrupt it on purpose.

We also get practical about emotional healing and relapse prevention with one hard but necessary tool: boundaries. Sometimes that means a no contact rule with the person, the place, the setup, or even family voices that keep feeding lies about your worth. Our mantra stays the same: how to survive the flame when what attracts you burns. If you’re ready to protect your peace and fight for your healing, subscribe, share this with a survivor, and leave a review so more people can find the help they need.

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Transcript

You Are A Survivor

SPEAKER_01 0:01

You are a survivor. You. Yeah, I'm talking to you. You're a survivor. You survived attacks. You've overcome. You made it through the struggle. You came out on top. You are a survivor. Unfortunately, there are many survivors who are who are at risk of relapse. A survivor at risk of relapse. You're at risk of relapse. The danger is in when you begin to daydream. It's when daydreaming becomes dangerous. You're a survivor. You're at risk of relapse because daydreaming has become dangerous. We're gonna get into that today. I am your host, Dr. Lydia Michelle Young. I'm here with my co-host, mentor, formation life coach, intercessor Janine Nicole is here in the building. Today is Wednesday. It is Wednesday, it is the middle of the week. And many of you know that we refer to Wednesday, the middle of the week, as midweek refreshing fire, where we share words with you, phrases with you, ideas with you, insight, wisdom, knowledge uh with you, uh to refreshen you, to give you a fresh feeling about your life, of refreshing, a fresh start, a fresh idea, uh a new beginning. Um, and so not only to refreshen you, um, but also to provide words to you to remind you of your worth. We want to add value to your life, not just for a moment of life change, but a change that will last you for the rest of your life. Uh, thank you for listening into Sweet Fire, the podcast here where our mantra is how to survive the flame when what attracts you burns. Again, this this session is dedicated to survivors who are at risk of relapse. Come on, intercessor, jump in.

SPEAKER_00 2:21

Good evening, everyone. Yes, thank you for tuning in and listening to Sweet Fire the podcast survivors, survivors in danger of relapse because of the daydreaming. I like that. That is good in danger

When Daydreaming Becomes Dangerous

SPEAKER_00 2:40

of relapse because of the daydreaming, spending too much time, too much investing too much of cognitive energy on something that means you no good, can cause harm to you, can distract you, and get you off course of fulfilling your destiny because your destiny is attached to your worth, right? But that the the danger in in the daydreaming, right? You know, to keeping our minds in areas that mean us no good, areas that exhaust us, drain us of strength, drain us of, you know, just focusing on our purpose, keeping us completely, utterly distracted, thereby keeping us off course. The dangers of daydreaming, I I love it. I'm looking forward to to jumping into. I know I kind of started a little bit, but I'm definitely looking forward to diving even a little further.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Let's dive in. Let's dive in a little further. So you said something very significant, uh, had me to think it even more, a little more deeper. Uh, when you said keeping our minds uh in areas, right? You said keeping that that's the key word, keeping our minds in areas that mean us no good, that are unhealthy, right? Keeping our minds in areas, in other words, locking our minds up in areas, in thoughts, in arenas, in places, in spaces uh uh which are not healthy for us, uh resting our minds, right, holding us captive, arresting our minds, holding us captive in a space, in a place that is not meant, that is not intended for us. So when we do that, we are actually threatening our current peace. If you are finding yourself daydreaming uh about your ex, about that relationship, the toxicity, um, if you're recovering, you know, alcoholic, if you find yourself daydreaming about going to the store, buying a bottle, going, you know, to uh to a place, a joint as they call them, where people are uh participating, partaking of, engaging. It's okay to go out and have a good time, but be mindful of your environment, be mindful of the setup, be mindful of the trick, be mindful of the trap that you may uh uh uh find yourself have fallen in because you lack discernment, because you didn't uh think with a solid thought. So, what what am I getting at? I'm saying a lot, but what I'm getting at is when we daydream and we're now we're at risk of relapse because we spend too much time, too much energy in our thoughts thinking about things, uh, people, places which are unhealthy for us, we threaten our current peace. Not only that, we are at the risk of pulling ourselves back into the cycle. Come on.

SPEAKER_00 5:51

Yeah, yeah. Because when when we we all have daydream, it doesn't matter, you know, your age bracket, your age group, we all have daydream. We still, you know, daydream uh uh to this day, but it's the danger of when we spend, we take our we allow our thoughts to go into an arena that is not healthy, right? An arena where it's it's nothing but a bunch of the atmosphere, it's toxic. When we find ourselves daydreaming on those, you know, uh again, what uh a doctor just said, daydreaming if you're an alcoholic, daydreaming about you know, uh um alcoholic beverages, if you're a recovering addict, daydreaming about the narcotic that you were once addicted to, if you were in a toxic, abusive relationship, in any type of relationship where there was toxicity, but we allow our minds to just stay on that X, stay on the experiences of you know what we had in that toxic relationship. Anytime we allow our minds to go into places, into arena, arenas, into veins, into areas

From Thoughts To Risky Actions

SPEAKER_00 7:10

that mean us no good, and we just keep our thoughts on that, it becomes dangerous because what happens? We start, you know, we begin, we find ourselves acting out according to what we have been thinking, according to what we have been rehearsing. We find ourselves picking up that phone, texting that ex, picking up that phone, putting in a phone call to that ex, getting into the car and going to that liquor store, getting into the car and driving to that corner to get that drug because we know that drug dealer deals on that street, right? Any time that we spend so much of our energy in unhealthy places, we allow the opportunity to react, to react to that which we have been spending so much time rehearsing. And many of us, I'm getting ready to hand it back over to you, Doctor, but many of us can relate to what I'm getting ready to say right now. Sometimes when we allow our minds to just stay engaged, actively engaged in an unhealthy area, and then somebody tried to engage us in a conversation at that time that we are in an unhealthy area in our minds. How many of us can relate to being guilty of snapping on that person that has absolutely nothing at all to do with what we have been thinking about? Right, right, the power of the thought, even when it's not spoken, right?

SPEAKER_01 8:49

The power of the thought. Uh, because where what your mind is fixated on, that's where your feet will lead you to. Right. Your mind will lead your feet to that place. Right. Your mind will lead you to that place. Um, so yeah, that that that's that's a powerful thought. And so when you we talk about keeping our minds being arrested or our minds being locked into a place when we're spending so much energy, the energy of our thoughts in a place uh unhealthy for

Mental Loops And What They Manifest

SPEAKER_01 9:18

us. Um what's happening is uh now we're in a mental loop. Right. A mental loop. If anyone any of you out there know any about anything about music and recording, um, when we loop the music, it means it plays continuously. Yeah. Like a hula hoop. It's round, it goes around and around and over and over and over. And what we're really doing when we're in a mental loop is we're playing over and over in our minds certain words. It plays over and it's like rolling a word over and over in your mind, rolling a situation, an experience, an incident, uh, a love affair, um, you know, part of your journey when you roll it over and over and over, when it when it's allowed to roll over and over and over and over. Have any of you ever been in that situation? And I some of you are, I can see that so clearly. That's why this topic has uh came to surface today, where you found yourself just sitting, or you know, or driving, or whatever you're doing, you're in a room and there's noise, but you can't hear what's going on. Why? Because you're in a mental loop, you're surrounded by people, you're surrounded by people, there's a television going on, there's music playing, there's a crowd, you're surrounded by, but you're in a mental loop where your mind is going in a circle where your mind is arrested because you're daydreaming, you're stuck in a certain my goodness, when our thoughts are stuck now. If it's positive, I can see that you know, some things are gonna manifest, things will come to fruition, but we're talking about staying away from the negative start, the negative thought, excuse me. Uh cleaning our minds, sweeping through our minds uh from the toxic relationship, sweeping through our minds from the thoughts that try to bombard us. This this came to my mind, and and and a lot of you have heard this is this text. It says, the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy. So by any means of necessary, when when the enemy is able to captivate or arrest our minds, jump in on the end of that. When the enemy is able to captivate or arrest our minds, what happens, intercessor?

SPEAKER_00 11:41

Then he's able to kill, steal, and destroy. When he does that, when I like what you said just a few minutes, a few moments ago, how you touched on the fact when we rehearse what's positive, then the manifestation, right? It eventually comes into fruition. So does it vice versa, and so does it vice versa. Anytime that we manifest, anytime that we are rehearsing the negative, uh, the negative thoughts in our minds, the same is going to happen. It is it's eventually going to manifest, it is eventually going to come into fruition. So this is again, this is why we're uh reiterating the power behind the thought. There is so much power in our minds. Our minds are powerful, and our minds can manifest the positive, or our minds can manifest the negative. So we have to we have to be careful with what we allow to be rehearsed in our minds. And the, you know, the trick, I'm glad you uh brought the enemy, you know, into this, right? Because when we rehearse, when we allow our minds to stay captivated with the negative, when we allow our minds to be in bondage to that which is negative, in essence, we are allowing the devil to use us against us. I'm gonna say that again because that's powerful. When we allow our minds to stay captivated, allow our minds to stay in bondage to that which is negative, we are allowing the enemy to use us against us because the devil knows that eventually the negative thoughts are going to manifest because we're giving those negative thoughts the energy that the negative thoughts need to have a leg to stand on. That is why it is important that we take charge, we take control of what we allow to stay, you know, rehearse in our minds. We need to stay focused on those things that keep us reminded of our worth, those things that you know give that empower us, those things that build up our confidence, the things that are positive, that's what we need to give the energy to. That's what we need to continuously rehearse in our minds.

SPEAKER_01 14:15

That's right, right. Rehearsing the thoughts in our minds. If we give thought to the negative, that's what we give birth to, right? You said when we rehearse in our minds those things that are positive, uh, that plan, that purpose, you know, the direction for our lives, when we rehearse those things, then that's what we'll we'll give birth to. That's what we'll manifest. So when we're rehearsing, when we're in a mental loop, it really means that we're meditating on the memory, we're meditating on the moment, and a lot of times meditating on madness. So we have to be very careful of you know our thought process and how we allow our thoughts to flow, where we allow our thoughts to go. And I really appreciate you know what what you're sharing here about the you know, the mind being captivated and how we, you know, recognize the thoughts of the enemy, you know, in your mind. Recognize the thoughts of the enemy of your soul in your mind. My goodness, I mean that just recognizing the thoughts so that you can, as we say in our fireproof coaching platform, um, so you can refocus, reset, and rebuild.

No Contact Boundaries To Protect Healing

SPEAKER_01 15:32

And so a lot of times, intercessor, uh, as we uh prepare to close out this session, in order to maintain uh emotional health and healing, right? Right, um, uh that that healing that continue because we started off talking to survivors who are in danger of risk of relapse. So, in order to uh maintain your emotional health and healing, uh for that healing uh to take place and to be maintained and be sustained, it's important a lot of times uh for us to uh go into a no contact order or no contact rules, right? Right, no contact approach. Right. What are your thoughts on that?

SPEAKER_00 16:13

Yeah, I'm glad you brought that out because that's where my mind went. Okay, exactly. That is exactly where my mind went because again, we opened up with you know, survivors, right? Each and every one of us, we are survivors, we have survived something, we have survived someone, you know, and in order to maintain that, there has to be no contact orders at times. It really has to be because if you want to maintain, you know, that survivor mode, that survivor lifestyle, right? That's the stamina, the stamina that comes with being a survivor. Sometimes we have to put a no-contact order out there.

SPEAKER_01 16:57

That's it.

SPEAKER_00 16:58

Because you know, there are some of you right now who are tuning in, you have been rehearsing the negative that has been spoken about you throughout your life, those negative words that were spoken that you will never be anybody, you will never amount to anything, you are a loser. All of those negative lies, those negative lies that have been spoken about you and have been spoken over you, you have been rehearsing those, and that is why your healing has not, you know, gone further. You have not progressed in the healing process because you have allowed your mind to rehearse the lies, and we are here on this evening to speak life, to speak the truth over your life. You are a survivor, and rather or not you continue in the survivor mode, it depends on you. We have to rehearse those the truth about who we are, and we have to dismiss the lies. We have got to stop rehearsing those lies, and you may need to put that no contact order in place, and unfortunately, it's the truth of it. Unfortunately, the no contact order a lot of times, who doesn't have to be placed on doctor? But our family. A lot of times, the no contact orders, we must put them into place, implement them over our lives, and they are applicable to our loved ones because sometimes, unfortunately, it is our loved ones that try to speak, you know, lies about who we are, and it's really those closest to us that cause us so much harm.

SPEAKER_01 18:52

That's Bible, too.

SPEAKER_00 18:53

You know, that's Bible. So you may need to put that no uh contact clause into place while you are going through your healing process. And I'm gonna say this as we are preparing to close. We have to become so passionate about our healing, so passionate about who we are that we fight for it. Not literally speaking, you know, hands off, but I'm just saying to where we are, we fight for it. We have to become passionate about that because who else is gonna be as passionate about our healing and our wholeness but us?

SPEAKER_01 19:34

That's it. Fight for it. She said it. You heard it, you heard it loud and clear. You heard it from mentor, uh, intercessor. Fight for it. No more mental loops, no more mental loops. Maintain your survivor survival. Um, don't relapse. Um, keep the strength, stay encouraged, be empowered. Peace be to you, peace be to your house, and peace be to all.