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Nivedita: Welcome to Floating Questions, the podcast where curiosity leads, we follow, and stories unfold. My name's Rui, simply asking questions. Shall we begin?

Rui: 

Rui: Hi Nividita. How are you today?

Nivedita: Rui, I'm doing good. By the way, you can call me Nivi.

Rui: Okay, I'll call you that, but I definitely want to make sure that I can pronounce your first name the full version, 

Nivedita: that's so thoughtful. Thank you. most of the times people just, like, hey, Niv. Or, hey, Nivi. So, thanks for asking that. 

Rui: Can I make a little bit weird joke?

Nivedita: Go ahead.

Rui: your first name literally can be shortened into NVIDIA, the stock ticker. 

Nivedita: You know, actually, my friends do call me that. Some of my friends, they call me N. V. D. [00:01:00] or N. V. D. R. these friends are from India. It's not that they have a problem in calling my name or pronouncing it. They do it intentionally. 

Rui: I'm glad I'm not the first person to say that, especially as a non Indian person.

Rui: thank you for being the first ever female guest on my podcast. I'm so, so happy that you're here and really honored to have you, sharing your stories 

Nivedita: Actually, thank you for having me and I'm really looking forward to our conversation. 

Rui: just to share a little bit story of how Nivi and I connected. Uh, actually it was your boyfriend who reached out to me on LinkedIn after I posted it. I'm really thankful that he came across that post and this is the type of serendipity that I'm hoping for.

Nivedita: I am so thankful to him, uh, and not just for this podcast that I'm here, but in general that I met you, like, I love that our frequency just matched right there, [00:02:00] uh, and yes, I'm grateful for him, everything that he does for me. 

Rui: Okay, well, um, why don't we start with a self intro?

Nivedita: hi, I am Nivedita, uh, Nivi. I'm a silicon architect at Meta, where I'm currently working on different aspects of AR glasses. Hardware. I'm a hardware engineer. in my past life, I was a rocket scientist at Indian Space Research Organization, where I worked on digital system of space satellites.

Nivedita: I grew up in Lucknow, India, um, which is city of Nawabs, so royalty. and I'm a big time foodie, so I love trying new cuisines, um, exploring new things. I would say in everything, like in sports, in food, in technology, That's all about me.

Rui: I'm sure there's so much more about you than the short intro that you [00:03:00] just gave. Um, so let's dive into it. Let me start from a very naive question. Can you explain to me a little bit more about what do you do exactly as a silicon architect?

Nivedita: Sure. For people who are not familiar with VR and AR. VR is like you put on the headset and then you would just enter a different world, whereas AR is you are in your world. And then we add a little bit of more reality to your world and it's an augmented reality.

Nivedita: So as a Silicon architect, we, design the specifications. I'm a compression architect. and these are the application that these AR glasses will be used in. So then what kind of compression algorithm do we need? let's say there are multiple, Pipelines or engines in AR glasses architecture like display, graphics, camera vision. then based on the application required, we come up with [00:04:00] compression algorithms that meet the requirements and specifications to make the product a better version.

Nivedita: Mm

Rui: Um, help me understand a little bit more about what compression that you really do

Nivedita: me understand connected the dots a little bit better.

Nivedita: now that Orion is out there. I'm very proud to share that. That was my first product that I worked at Meta. They are world's first full fledged AR glasses. So it has a lot of camera sensors right on the front. these camera sensors capture Whatever you are looking at. so then when the camera sensors capture the data, that data cannot be processed, it will require a lot of memory, a lot of compute. So before processing or, forwarding it to another engine, we compress the data. This is just one basic example of image compression, and we have a lot of compression, engines in different parts of AR glasses.

Rui: So [00:05:00] the processing layer, I presume lives on a virtual, machine somewhere. That's not on the hardware embedded with the glasses. 

Nivedita: It's both. based on the complexity of the data that we want to process, it's, it's divided. So that is the beauty that Silicon Architects and the entire hardware team brings, right?

Nivedita: including all the features on so many small chips, Least power consumption and least memory requirement. that's very hard.

Rui: That's very cool. Let me take another step back How is the Meta Ray-ban, glasses, different from the Orion glasses that you worked on.

Nivedita: So the meta Ray Ban glasses, RBMs, like we say them are smart glasses, right? they have contextual AI capability in them. They can understand the world around you, and communicate with you and, Do amazing [00:06:00] things like listening to songs, taking pictures, taking videos. My favorite is safety being a woman. It's a very big concern for me. So let's say if I'm wearing my RBMs and they're connected to your phone, right? and if I see anything unusual around me, I don't need to take out my phone You can just say, Hey, call my, call my boyfriend or call my parent Or if somebody is approaching you and you don't feel comfortable, you can just say, Hey man, I'll record a video and upload it on Instagram or something like that.

Nivedita: Whereas Orion, which is the first full fledged AR glasses, it has this amazing capability of you can imagine your real world as a canvas. And it combines the digital world onto your real world. So imagine your actual world is a canvas, you're talking to someone, and then the video is displayed on top of that. So it's right in front of you. You can see the person you're talking [00:07:00] without any smartphone. probably you don't need any smartphone for most of the tasks. And this happens because of the large holographic displays that we have. And on top of that, they have the contextual AI capability as well. So it understands the world around you and provide you all the capabilities that meta RBMs have.

Nivedita: And. It's a three part system, we have AR glasses, we have an EMG wristband uh, and we have a small compute device, puck,

Nivedita: So the EMG band, they track your senses, Like, you can swipe, roll, and all the actions that you do so that it can seamlessly interact with your glasses. So kind of, like a cursor, like your mouse. works. You can tap and it does a few things. And then you have Puck, half the size of your phone, which is a [00:08:00] wireless compute system. meant for doing a lot of processing that cannot be accommodated in glasses. 

Rui: Can I just use one single device without the other two, or I have to use all three?

Nivedita: So there are two configurations. You can use, um, glasses and the EMG band and glasses, EMG band and the puck.

Rui: I see. what was the most challenging, thing that you've worked through?

Nivedita: I think first of all, I was just amazed and mesmerized by this technology and the product that we were building. Most of the work, I don't think I ever found it challenging.

Nivedita: the more I heard about the features that we were working on and the things that we're trying to build, it was always like a wow factor to me. And, and I think that made me love my work a [00:09:00] lot. I think it was an honor to work on something like this. And it was a dream come true kind of a moment.

Rui: I love this answer. a lot of people wouldn't be able to really say I like my job, let alone I love my job, to the point that I don't find anything super challenging because I'm just constantly amazed, and I think that's a fantastic reality for you to be able to live in, and I can relate to some extent, like, despite there's stress at work for me from time to time, But I think I understand what I'm working for, or working towards. And because of that, It's just a game. And it's fun to be able to play that game. And it's a privilege to be able to even be on the board game and be able to do exactly what we do,

Nivedita: Right. and I think, a major part of that is also because of the people that you work with. I am very lucky to be a part of Reality Labs and the people that I work with. [00:10:00] I never felt for a moment that I have this challenge and I have to tackle this by myself. You know, every time I was stuck, I could ask the stupidest question. like, there was never a moment of judgment.

Nivedita: when I joined, I had imposter syndrome because I found myself sitting in a room of some amazing people who have done amazing work. And I was just a college graduate, like master's graduate. And. In the beginning, I would start with Hey, I have a stupid question. And most of my metamates that we like to call, they would be like, Oh, those are the best ones. Bring it on. Having that made me feel so comfortable in my work, uh, that I never found them stupid anymore. 

Rui: Yeah, for sure. Besides the problem space, who you work with and the team, definitely determine the happiness level of the work for sure. Um, but I would say that you probably sell [00:11:00] yourself short a little bit because before your master's degree, you worked for the Space Agency, um, a research organization back in India, which is really, impressive.

Rui: Maybe share a little bit more story about that.

Nivedita: So, I, I grew up in Lucknow, uh, up until my high school I was definitely fascinated by space and the technology, but I never dreamt of that I could become a scientist one day and I could build that. Um, while I was applying for colleges, we my father and I, we were like, okay, let's apply for this college.

Nivedita: and I'm just taking a step back of how this journey started. So, um, in space research organization have a college of themselves. which is Indian Institute of Space Science and Technology, where they only take 150 students per year, um, out of like 180 to 190, 000 applications. [00:12:00] And it's a fully funded scholarship by government of India.

Nivedita: So you don't have to think about your housing, your food, your education, everything is funded by them. so that's how, so my father and I, we were like, okay, let's apply for the college. it's very ambitious, but let's do that. So we did that, and I just got in, and it was something none of us Yes, could believe, 

Rui: So, Let me make sure that I heard the numbers correctly. It's a 150 cohort,

Rui: and there is about like 180, 000 students usually apply for that cohort every year.

Nivedita: Uh, right.

Rui: That's crazy. Uh, that's super, super impressive. But like, why did you even choose this space? that's a very niche, You know, college to go to. Were you interested in space even when you were young? Or it is more like [00:13:00] coincidental that you just end up there?

Nivedita: Um, so being an Indian, now the times have definitely changed and they are still changing, but at least like seven to eight years ago or like a decade ago. You either become an engineer or you become a doctor. So that's how things were, or like being an Indian, you also opt for like a third thing, which is civil services.

Nivedita: I was not the brightest person or student in the room. but while I was, wrapping up in my high school, I developed an interest in maths. I was only concerned with, I need to get like a hundred percent in maths and don't care about anything else. So that's how I got interested in studies. 

Nivedita: Um, but my father was like, okay, let's apply to all the colleges in India. And we'll take it wherever you get admit from. So I had never thought of, that I'd want to go to space space. I just had like, okay, I want to learn. That's all I knew. 

Nivedita: So we applied [00:14:00] to a bunch of colleges. Um, but this was the first admit. But then I got into other colleges as well, but then I had made up my mind, like, okay, this is where I want to go. Plus, My father was so happy. Like, you're going to be a scientist. 

Rui: What was the specific specialty that you were studying?

Nivedita: right. So the college, has three specialties. They offer aerospace, which is basically the satellite technology. It's mechanical and the outer structure and the technology related to that. Then the second is avionics, which is basically all the electronic aviation control dynamics and everything. And then third is physical sciences.

Nivedita: Which is everything related to Earth, like astronomy, material sciences. So I went for avionics. And fun fact there, aerospace is actually the first priority of everyone that gets into the university. And you get it on merit basis. [00:15:00] So I got that and I didn't know exactly the importance of three branches.

Nivedita: So the counselor explained to us Oh, aerospace is the first priority everyone goes for. And my father and I were like, okay, we'll also go for aerospace. Sure. Why not? if I'm getting the opportunity to select the best, why not?

Nivedita: And then comes my first day at college, my father and I, we visited the college and then in one room, there are all the aerospace students and then in another there are avionics, And my father notices there are only two girls in the entire room. And that counselor also happens to be there, and he goes back to him and he's like, Hey, there are only two females in the entire class. And he said, I know your daughter is the best. And she got in. And my father's like, No, but I don't want my daughter to be here. then he was [00:16:00] like, what is the female percentage in the other two branches?

Nivedita: And then he's like, Oh, in the avionics like 15 out of 60, 15 females out of 60, And my father's like, okay, she's going to go there. And that's how I ended up in avionics, which I am very grateful for. I love my work that I do. 

Rui: What was your father's reasoning, for not wanting you to be the two females out of the 60 cohort?

Nivedita: So I think his intention was whether I'll be able to settle down We've never lived in an environment of like co ed culture, right?

Nivedita: they were mostly, thinking from how I'll settle down there because my college was in Kerala, which is one of the Southern states of India. And we are from North India. So he was trying from his end to make my life comfortable. That was his way of doing that, I think. Um, but yeah, I think it. ends well, so [00:17:00] I'm happy. that's how my specialty started. 

Rui: so what did you do exactly at the space agency, the research organization?

Nivedita: Right. so all the satellites have different kinds of sensors. um, let's say ChandRuiaan, which I think most of people are familiar with. so ChandRuiaan, let's say had two parts, orbiter and lander. So Orbiter is basically orbits around the moon and captures images of the moon.

Nivedita: And then Lander is basically is a part that lands on the moon and tries to capture data, basically what kind of surroundings are there on the moon. So all the sensors that are involved, let's say the Orbiter, the sensors that are capturing the images, I built the electronics for that, for systems like this.

Nivedita: It's not just me. There was a team. build electronics for how to control those sensors. When should the sensors be turned on, turned off? How much [00:18:00] duration should be, should they be on? Because when you build a satellite, like there are power consumption and there are a lot of factors that need to be, um, considered. While building and even during operation. So that was my main work.

Rui: So you have something right now in the space.

Nivedita: Six or seven of them.

Rui: That is a humble brag. I will take it.

Nivedita: Thank you.

Rui: And I love it. when you look into the space thinking there is something out there Because of you that's fantastic

Nivedita: yeah, I think that is something I'll always be proud of myself. like as we speak, there are a couple of satellites that have a small portion of my work. So I'm very proud of that.

Rui: Yeah, for sure. And I love that you own that achievement and then you are proud of yourself because I think Way too often people, uh, [00:19:00] especially minority or woman could shrink from their achievements, and diminish themselves a little bit. Um, maybe just out of the normal humility, but I think at some point you also just need to take the credit and to take the compliment and say, thank you.

Rui: Um, When you were telling the story of how you, embark on the journey of studying space, science, you always mentioned you and your father. So apparently your father is a very significant figure, in your life.

Rui: Can you tell a little bit more, that side of the story, like what was the role that your father was playing in your entire journey?

Nivedita: Oh, where do I start from? Um, so I am the first female, on my father's side to get education, right?

Rui: Entire family history.

Nivedita: entire family history. Yes.

Rui: Wow. Yeah.

Nivedita: Um, so we actually belong to a small village in UP and [00:20:00] my father has seven siblings and out of those eight of them, he gathered some courage, To step outside of the village and make a name for himself.

Nivedita: and his seven siblings are still in, in village and they're doing really good as well there. But my father was the one who worked really hard. It wasn't an easy journey for him, but he worked really hard not to just make a name for himself, but also change our lives. I for a fact know that we weren't financially well initially, 

Nivedita: So even sending me to school and sending my siblings to school, I know that that wasn't easy for him. Uh, and we all belong to a village. So education was never like the most important part of our lives. But my father took a step and he was like, no, my daughters, my son, my [00:21:00] children are going to get education.

Nivedita: So that was one step he took for us. And my family is. a bit of patriarchal, Now it's changing. It has changed a lot, but you can imagine how I am the first female on my father's end to get education and do even like bachelors, right? 

Nivedita: when I got my admit from my college, we lived in Northern part of India and my college was like in the Southern most, So all my relatives were like, how can you even think of sending her there? and it's a coed college.

Nivedita: Are you sure you want to do that? Um, We had also applied to an all girls college, and we went there to enroll me in that college, and while we were there, one of the other girls parents, father, So he and my father were talking and my father was like, Oh, she also got admit [00:22:00] from this other college, which is IST.

Nivedita: It's a space college. And that guy, I'm so thankful to that guy. He said, are you crazy? Why are you even here? Your daughter got into the best college of the country and you're still thinking about getting her into this college because it's an all girls college, my father is from medical background, he was not fully aware of engineering and these colleges. So he was thinking the best for me. Uh, but then After that conversation, everything changed. In fact, my life changed. my father was like, okay, we're going to go back. We're not enrolling here. it was just one day after we had paid my tuition fee. And the college is not refunding that.

Nivedita: But still, my father was like, okay, we're going back. You're not going here. We'll go and we'll take admission there. all my relatives were like are you sure you want to send her? 

Rui: and then my father was like, are you guys crazy?

Nivedita: she is going to become a [00:23:00] scientist and we all should be proud of that. And that's how he just. took that bold step against everyone in my family and my mom was always supportive of me Uh, but sometimes the society gets on your brain like, 

Nivedita: she also had her own doubts Like okay Are you sure you wanna go there? I'm like, yeah, I'm sure. I think that's where I became this rebel person. The more I heard everyone like, oh, you shouldn't go, you cannot go. You know, that you cannot go statement made me like, okay, I want to go here. I think that the entire start of my professional journey, I owe it to my father.

Rui: super impressive. And It's kind of remarkable how other people's, passing comment would just make such a huge difference in another person's life. And also, I think in the United States, or in general, Western developed country, [00:24:00] gender equality is a topic that has been talked about for decades, and 

Rui: I'm not saying that there isn't any more problem to be fixed in the U. S. I'm just saying that. The amount of progress made in other places is still not enough for a lot of women, a lot of girls to have the same opportunities, 

Nivedita: I, Agree with you a hundred percent on that. And I feel like it's also a responsibility of us, as women who have made it to somewhere to change that norm, not just for you, for others as well for your upcoming generation. 

Rui: Yeah, a hundred percent. Um, maybe let me pull on the thread about your father a little bit further because while he was such a huge advocate for you throughout this entire journey, the societal pressure or the traditions [00:25:00] still get to him a little bit, get to your mom a little bit, 

Rui: Are there other parts of your journey where you had to find your way?

Nivedita: he has seen all my cousins getting married at 18, And, When I graduated, I was 21 and had the perfect job in India, 

Nivedita: It was the prestigious job, not just the perfect job. it was like, what's next? It's marriage, of course. And I just couldn't understand that. I was like, no, that's where I think my father and me and my entire family, weren't on the same page.

Nivedita: and I wanted to see what's out there. I wanted to learn more. that's was one conversation that never ended on a good note. after I worked at Estro for three, four years, I wanted to see and venture outside of the space industry 

Nivedita: that's when I expressed my, interest of going for higher [00:26:00] studies. and I remember in 2018 or 2017, when I told my parents and they just couldn't take it. They couldn't take two things. A, how can you even think of leaving this job, As a female. This is the best you can do according to society, right? And all my relatives had started bringing like different marriage proposals, and here I am talking about leaving the country and going to US for higher studies.

Nivedita: obviously the societal pressure got to him different people were like, we told you don't send her to college. this is what happened. It's, you did this, you know?

Nivedita: um, what if she marries someone there? I think, that kind of took a toll on him and sometimes I do feel bad about him because he was always there for me. And I have to say, it wasn't easy for my parents to have a child like me, was always creating problems and not like [00:27:00] the perfect and ideal child.

Nivedita: during that time I did explore other opportunities, which were in India, I was like, okay, let me listen to them. Let me explore other options. So I did explore like MBA and other opportunities but I didn't feel interest in those other opportunities.

Nivedita: And that's when I decided, I do want to be in tech and I do want to pursue higher studies. So I applied for master's. I applied to multiple colleges, and I had very limited knowledge. I had no one to guide me. So I applied to whatever I could find 

Nivedita: and I got admit from NC State. That was my first admin that I got. And I was like, okay, I'm going. I flew from India to us in August, 2019. And I told my parents sometimes in April, I got to admit I'm leaving. And up until then, we were not having like [00:28:00] normal conversations. Because they wanted me to start thinking about marriage rather than pursuing higher education. And then when I told them, Okay, this is it. I have this admit and I'm leaving. So let's try to be cordial and happy at least for the next three, four months that we have. It's your choice. And once that happened and my father knew that, okay, nothing can change her mind now. So, he was back in my team and he helped me with all the process he was like, I'm going to fund your education.

Nivedita: And I'm like, no. So I took a loan for everything. and this is something he just cannot accept until date. He's angry at me why didn't you let me fund your education? I was like, no, this is something I want to do on my own. 

Nivedita: So there were a few times when my father and my mother and I, myself, we [00:29:00] were not on the same page, but now they are so proud of me, again, all's well that ends well, 

Rui: I got really emotional while you were talking all about that.

Nivedita: Oh,

Rui: Because I can relate Um,

Nivedita: tell me 

Rui: so many different points. 

Nivedita: yeah, tell me, I would like to know about your journey a little bit. 

Rui: I think my family has always been very supportive of my education, for sure. I remember I told them that I'm going to go to the States when I was 13, because there's a specific thing that I want to pursue, which is I need to figure out who I am and what I want. and I think, uh, US in general would have a little bit more flexibility, um, in academics in college or undergrad for me to really explore different things.

Rui: they didn't really believe that until maybe when I was 16, I was in a normal Chinese high school. Uh, actually that was the best one in my province to prep for the college entrance exam, which is huge thing in China, just like in India. but I made up my [00:30:00] mind that I, I really wanted to explore the world a little bit more.

Rui: So when I was 16, I brought this up again and, um, it was definitely difficult for them to really accept. and my mom told me now I don't really remember any of that, but They told me, we had multiple family meetings and I finally convinced them, because I told them that I just can't live a life where I can imagine how my life will just pan out exactly based on this traditional path.

Rui: as the years go by, I can understand how difficult this is for my parents emotionally, too. fundamentally, they're loving, they care so much about us and give us a lot as we grow up. And, especially I'm the only kid, so choosing to just leave everything behind, Now I can understand how emotionally difficult it is for them.

Rui: maybe for [00:31:00] me, the most poignant, part of your story is also the part of, how your parents potentially feel throughout your decision. And, I love the fact that we picked our path. I couldn't imagine my life any other way other than the way that it is right now.

Rui: and I'm extremely happy about it, but at the same time, I know that comes with the cost, the cost of, you know, not being with family for a long time. Um, Being away from the loved ones, I think we both had to give up a lot and accept a lot of loss in order to be where we are today. And that's, that's difficult.

Nivedita: Definitely. I, I got emotional. Rui, you were like, you had clarity at 13, what you wanted to do. it's something not everyone has. And you should be proud of yourself. Like, [00:32:00] It's amazing for a 13 year old to know what they want to do and then fight for it.

Nivedita: It's not easy. And again, especially if you're a woman, You're awesome.

Rui: thank you. 

Nivedita: And you rightly said, Rui, I think in hindsight, 

Nivedita: it took them some time to understand our perspective. Sometimes it took longer than we wanted. But I'm so grateful that my parents understood me and, and they came along. and they're very proud of me now. I'm so grateful of that.

Rui: I'm sure they are. for everything that you are able to achieve and chart your own path. 

Rui: my biggest friction with my parents, particularly my dad, came when I was here in the U. S. for undergrad. maybe that's the moment that he really grappled with the fact that I'm just thousands of miles away and doing my own thing and have very different ideas.

Rui: And it was a [00:33:00] very frictional point because he probably just felt helpless



Rui: be able to reach me and to understand me or to even bridge our gaps. And it took me years to really see that and nowadays, try to reconnect back. 

Nivedita: I think that was also one of my parents main concern, they were like, we can't reach out to you. What if something happens to you when you are in us? in hindsight that all the concerns were valid, I think there could have been easier ways of handling that, when I could have used their support but even they didn't know this was the first time they were facing something like this, right?

Rui: Yeah, I feel like maybe the younger version of me would also have the reaction just like you how could you not supportive of this? How could you not understand where I'm at? How could you just not understand me? and also just accept me for who I am.

Rui: [00:34:00] Um,

Nivedita: but it is right. Like now they have that level of confidence, but okay. Whenever my kids go, they'll be fine. so now my brother and my sister, they're just happy. Like you be the experimental child and we'll enjoy everything. Nice. So,

Rui: I have to say Maybe being the stubborn version of us also pushed our parents to grow, too.

Rui: I think my parents actually got married and had me pretty late in that era. my mom had me when she was 28

Rui: or 29, But still, I think a lot of parts of my parents were not mature when they had me. And I think the fact that I'm like so stubborn and force them to maybe even just practice non attachment, 

Rui: And also the fact that I'm here, sometimes they came in and visit me. It will also force them to [00:35:00] really learn the new technology, a new way of interacting with the world. 

Nivedita: Right. now that you mentioned that it hit me actually because my mom had me when she was 19 and my dad was 22. it's been a long journey. 

Rui: Have you always been like this since when you were a kid? Or you grow into the version that is so confident, and unapologetically proud of yourself?

Nivedita: So some part of mine was pretty confident, uh, 

Nivedita: But when I went for my bachelor's education, I got scared. I was very scared because my batch mates everyone had their own skill set. And for the first time in my life, I felt like I don't know anything. I would always think twice [00:36:00] before doing anything. So I became a very submissive version of myself and that's when I met my boyfriend, and this confident version that you're seeing today, I think I owe it to him, some part of that. every time I would doubt myself, he would be the first one to call it out. sometimes we would even get into fights because I would say no. And he would be like, how can you think that you cannot do this? You already are good at it. 

Nivedita: So I grew up with him like a major confident part of me. Grew up because of him. 

Nivedita: and my, one of my good qualities is I think if I think about something and if I decide that I wanna do it, then I don't look back. I'm like, okay, I'm doing it. I know I'm gonna fall. I know I'm [00:37:00] gonna fail multiple times. But yes, I've pretty much succeeded in everything that I have decided that I wanted to.

Nivedita: fantastic Maybe let's talk a little bit about, you mentioned like giving back. Especially on, helping other women grow in their career and everything. What are the things that you are currently doing right now?

Nivedita: I started mentoring a lot of women in tech, back in India as well, like every woman that I come across in my family or, in my neighborhood I never hesitate to reach out to them and provide just that one comfort call that, Hey, what are you doing is right.

Nivedita: And I'm there If you ever need someone to talk to also, I found this amazing platform of women tech ambassadors, which is a nonprofit initiative by Google. And I applied for an ambassador, 

Nivedita: I've [00:38:00] hosted. a huge event, international women's day in Vancouver this year. I mentor one on one to women in tech who are like undergrad or we're still trying to figure out how to take the next step I also tried to encourage, a couple of my distant relatives, but then I got pushed back, you know, there's still some part of society where we don't want our daughters. To go to a different path than we've thought of, 

Nivedita: What are the common threats that you are seeing? Whether be it good or, things that you see people just struggle with.

Nivedita: the good thing is women are becoming more aware that they can make their own choices. the challenging thing was that there's always self doubt 

Nivedita: 

Rui: And how do you coach them through this process? what have you seen to be effective [00:39:00] in helping them out?

Nivedita: the one thing that I feel helped me was just questioning them. Like what kind of life do you imagine for yourself, like down the lane, five years, and then just do a reverse, in order to have that life, what should you be doing and when should you be doing that?

Nivedita: And they kind of answer themselves. And then they realize that, okay, I should be emphasizing and prioritizing this more than this. the other thing is, there are already a lot of male allies out there. It's just that in our head, we have created this world where we are supposed to do some certain things, certain ways. when I asked them, how is support from your, let's say partner, Oh, he's, he's great. He's very supportive. Then why are you taking a step [00:40:00] back? everyone has their own journey There is no set of rules that will help you in Becoming successful.

Nivedita: So I think the all you can do is just ask questions and Make them realize that they're already there. They just need to take a step.

Rui: Yeah, for sure. and I probably would say that take a step towards who you are, whether you want to be successful at career or not, or maybe just realize that you actually really want to be a great mom. I think that's a great realization. At the end of the day, be it woman, man, uh, anyone really, it's just all about stepping one step closer to who you are as a person. 

Rui: Right, being a mom in general, if you're not earning or if you don't have a job, is looked down upon, right? But that is one of the toughest jobs. You are shaping a human.

Rui: taking care of a human being and then helping [00:41:00] them grow is huge. at the same time, I feel it's very important to be financially independent. That is one thing I think should happen so that you're not dependent on anyone So you have a choice if anything.

Nivedita: yes exactly

Rui: Yeah, I think that's how my grandpa think. Cause at some point my mom can just quit her job. But I guess my grandpa was the one actually saying, it doesn't really matter how much you make. it doesn't really matter how big of that job is.

Rui: The fact that you have an independent source and you can always rely on that even if you don't ever have the possibility of like getting divorced or anything, that's really important. now, I think about it, my grandparents despite they coming from very small village, somehow both of them are extremely open minded.

Rui: Fascinating to think about this, right? Because when we're talking about [00:42:00] inequality along any dimension, I feel like our closest families and friends shape so much of that. And it's easy for us to really talk about, how, We would like other women to also become more confident and assure of themselves and take that bold and courageous step.

Rui: But the very fact that both of us were born into families that are on average much more supportive than other families of girls. 

Rui: and it was just by coincidence. So, how much of it is, is Really within my control that I can actually push for how much of it really just takes time is something That I don't have a good answer for but we can always try

Nivedita: Yeah, we can always try. I think many times things will not be in your favor, And it's on you how you take it.

Rui: This could be the last episode of [00:43:00] Floating Questions, or it may not be. Either way, I hope you enjoyed flowing along with us today. If you liked our journey, please consider subscribing. Thank you for listening, and may the questions always be with you.