Two for the Culture
Two for the Culture is brought to you be Steven Rey and Justin Devonte. This is the podcast for the ages! Both Steve and Justin has been friends for over a decade plus and will give you a genuine approach on news and culture with humor and love. I promise this will be one of your favorite podcasts that you will not get enough of!
Two for the Culture
Soulmates, Trust, and the Ethics of Love
Justin and Stephen explore profound life questions while reflecting on fear, truth, and relationships in this thought-provoking conversation.
• What we would do if we woke up with no fear tomorrow
• The desire to know absolute truth to life's biggest questions
• Whether soulmates exist and in what forms
• The ethics of leaving someone for another person
• Trust and the importance of actions matching words in relationships
• Whether humans are naturally good or naturally selfish
• What legacy we want to leave behind
• How exposure to violence in media affects society
If you enjoy these conversations, make sure to follow Two for the Culture wherever you get your podcasts.
And we are back with another episode of Two for the Culture. I'm Justin Devante.
Speaker 2:I'm Stephen Ray.
Speaker 1:Yes, sir, and we are back. I think we got a great show lined up for everyone here, so I'm excited. I'm excited too, man. All right, all right, let's get it for sure. How was your weekend?
Speaker 2:The weekend was good, man. I've really just been super locked in. Yeah, you know um. Yeah, you know um, I I don't I don't even know what provoked it, but just just really wanted to reach a new level with everything. So it's just another one of them spurts. So I'm like man, fuck everything, I gotta get it. So, uh, yeah, what about you?
Speaker 1:um, it was cool this weekend, just always just working you know, the same old, same old.
Speaker 1:It was a good weekend, you know. Uh, yeah, it's always. You know, I love to talk to people about, like different perspectives, what they got going on in their lives. You know interests and you know it's it keeps it interesting because, of course, it's a new individual for the most part, every single time. Yeah, exactly so you get to hear about people's lives and you know, of course, I'm saying the same old things that I've said a million times over, like are you from here?
Speaker 2:what do you do? Can you sit in the back seat?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, yeah, so that you know it keeps it interesting and lively and um, and it allows me to be educated a little bit more like when you hear different perspectives. So I mean I enjoy. I enjoyed it, I had a good weekend, it was fun.
Speaker 2:It's funny, I think on the last episode we were talking about spirituality and religion, you were saying something about the commandments and, randomly enough which is why I read this shit For me it's supernatural it just lines up Today. Which is why I read this shit, cause it's like for me it's like supernatural. That shit just lines up today Literally, cause I'm an Exodus right now. So today, literally, it was on the part of the 10 commandments. That was like literally, the, the, the, the verse of the day. Yeah, okay, that was crazy.
Speaker 2:I was like dang, it's like damn, it would be the day of the podcast that I would read this, because it was the last podcast that you said something about like the Ten Commandments and stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I can't remember what I said, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:We got to review it, but yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, understood. Hey, you want to just hop right into it? Yeah. Okay, you know I can go first. You have some.
Speaker 2:I'll go first this time. I'll go first this time, so all right. So if tomorrow you woke up with no fear, what is the first thing you'd do?
Speaker 1:If I woke up with no fear.
Speaker 2:No fear about anything.
Speaker 1:No fear about anything. What would I do? I would, but I still got my mind and my logic right. Yeah, so I just didn't have any fear. I still got my mind and my logic right, you know. Yeah, so I just didn't have any fear. That's a very interesting question, because I'm waking up as me, so I know I still have obligations.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that's very tough to also say. Is that how much? Because I do worry about others, like, what would that look like if I?
Speaker 2:because I you just didn't give a fuck, you just burned the house down and moved to paris. No, of course not.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would never like intentionally hurt somebody, but I still imagine I would still have love yeah so I would have love for a person to where I still do my daily obligations so I don't think much would really change outside of like my daily habits, but I would say I'm sure I'll take stronger risks oh, yeah, yeah exactly so I don't think my daily uh habits would change too much yeah, um that's a good one, yeah, yeah but.
Speaker 1:I know, I would take a bigger risk in terms of like, put myself out more. Like you know, we always have that fear of rejection, and so I would want to make you know, I mean, so I would do that, like I would probably be more of a person who, uh, you know, sell itself, brand itself. I'm not, I'm not really photogenic, so I'll probably, you know, put more of my brand out there. Yeah, and so I would probably, it would probably be more of that line. So I would probably see the difference.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that was a good one. Yeah, yeah. What about you? If I, tomorrow, I woke up with no fear, the first thing I'd do, you know? I kind of say I believe I would say the same. I wish you didn't go first, because I wouldn't have heard that. Yeah, but like yeah, that makes a lot more sense, even for me. You know, like shit, I could just walk into this building and just shake, do what Kanye did, and just not give a fuck.
Speaker 2:Just walk in here, go to the floor when the boss at Poor floor All right, and then just you know that, moving with no fear at all. I think that that's something we all should do a little bit more of actually. Yeah, that was pretty good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think to keep on further diving a little bit deep into that it's like I also care about others than what they think. Yeah, and I wish I had less of that. Yeah, yeah, I, I truly do, because I think about that a little bit more than I feel like the next person should yeah, and that I hold on a little bit more tighter to that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah that that has, uh well, I wouldn't say, slowed me down a little bit. But um, you know, like with my content and stuff it's like out there and like if I and I'm hopping in these scenes with the actual person, so sometimes like I could go a little further, but I'm like if I meet them, I want them to kind of like me a little bit. So I might not say a certain thing, that might be hilarious, but yeah, I can agree with that, for sure that was a good one.
Speaker 1:You got any others?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So if you could know the absolute truth to one question in life, what would you ask? I would ask, if I could, I would ask let's do this one thing just for just for clips or whatever, like when I, I mean, they're watching this and seeing this in real time it doesn't matter. But when we do this, like let's try to say the question before we say the answer, you know what?
Speaker 2:I'm saying, for instance, I just asked uh, if you could know the absolute truth to one question like what would you ask, like you say, if I could know the absolute truth?
Speaker 1:so just hold that shit clips and you know what I'm saying I got you just just just something to throw out there. I'm learning this too. I appreciate that, thank you.
Speaker 2:What was the question?
Speaker 1:If I could know the absolute truth. What was one question I would ask? I'm trying to find a way to ask the question. I know around and I'll just say the thing Um, I would ask God to give me the answer to how I should give his believers or his non believers you know what I mean. Like I would try to like, like yeah.
Speaker 1:Like how should I give the answer that you're real to non-believers? You know what I mean. Like it would be like the absolute truth, to where I could give the thing that would make it abundantly clear, if that makes sense. Because it's one question. So I mean I have a million no thanks. Yeah. So if I had to kind of put it, because I was like, hey, did you know John F kennedy? Really, you know what?
Speaker 2:I mean, yeah, it's the moon landing reel exactly, so I could.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm like dang, that would be a waste of a question, because that's only one thing, damn who's gonna believe this? Yeah, exactly yeah. So I would be like hey, how can I you ask, reveal yourselves in that question. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I feel like that's not going to happen Again. I'm in Exodus right now, right, bruh. And then you know Moses led everybody out of Egypt, or whatever. And then you know that whole thing and, for some reason, like God kept showing over and over, like he's God, like the different plagues and all that stuff that he showed.
Speaker 2:and then, once they got hungry, it was just like yo, like I don't, is is they just needed more confirmation, basically, and moses like dog like y'all just saw everything, yeah like and the only thing that kind of got them to, because I just got to the commandments right and the only thing was like a whole bunch of like lightning and fire and this and that and all that you know. So I feel like there has to constantly be for now this is my opinion, but I feel like there has to constantly be huge visual representation. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Of like this, this ain't magic. Yeah, I see what you're saying, like it's constant affirmation, not affirmation yeah, of like this, this ain't magic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I see what you're saying, like it's constant affirmation not affirmation, just like, like they can see.
Speaker 2:Yeah, this is this crazy. We're in the middle of the sea and you know this shit split like I think, I think something's going on here.
Speaker 1:I don't see no non-believer believing until like some crazy, some crazy even if they might be like well, you know science yeah, yeah, yeah, I I just did, because otherwise they'll be like all right, what's the next lotto number, dollar number tickets.
Speaker 2:So just oh facts.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, I was like okay, so, but I'm asking him the absolute. So he's all knowing, all you know, all-powerful, so that's one. Otherwise I'd be like, all right, lotto question. What's the lotto numbers?
Speaker 2:real quick. Yeah, so.
Speaker 1:I can come up or run it up real quick, yeah, yeah. So it would be something, but I feel like that would be a too easy one.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1:Because mine's a little bit more deeper and longer lasting, but I like these short fire ones.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:I think mine. What was your question? What was your answer? I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:If I could know the absolute truth to one question in life, it would be to ask God why are we here? Oh, okay. Yeah, I think that would. That would say a lot. Yeah, that would. I've always wanted to know that yeah like. What is where we?
Speaker 1:what are we here for?
Speaker 1:yeah, all right oh god, that's a nice, that's a nice little creation for being bored shit out here I mean, yeah, like painters paint, you know yeah so it's like, yeah, why did you do that thing? I just like to do it you know, so it could always be just that simple I mean, I guess, yeah, maybe I. Okay, I like your line of questions. Yeah, for sure, all right, you got it. Oh, I got it okay all right, so I think we've answered this question before, but this I like to do leading questions it's a leading it's a real question.
Speaker 1:I want to ask um, but do you believe in soulmates?
Speaker 2:um yes I knew that was going to be your answer yeah, the only reason that I, I, I, um, stumbled with that was just because it's a different way that I take it nowadays. At first I was like, oh, there's only one soulmate period. But I don't, I don't think so anymore. I think it may be multiple, multiple, different types, even like just me and you being friends. It's not like a, a romantic thing, but like a certain type of connection that's uh, so that they have like different versions of, of, of the words, for it is something make some, I don't know I I didn't get that deep into it, but I play.
Speaker 1:There are different versions and different types and I feel like you was going lean turds, soulmates and I? I feel like there's, so my answer is more so no, because there's so many people out here in this world and there's so many people that can fit the box that you want that.
Speaker 2:That's why I literally said, or expanded on it yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:So that's why I'll be like, nah, I don't. But because sometimes you can tell like, hey, this person actually may be right for me and you can kind of tell when they're not, and um, and some are easier than others. You People don't truly reveal themselves and it's not unlike some men. Let's just intent that they don't reveal themselves.
Speaker 1:It's just the ease of it. And then so comfortability, and then you try to trust that person a little bit more and be a little bit more vulnerable and you're like, okay, I'm glad you gave me that part of you, but that part of you is actually not for me. Yeah, and so that may take a little bit longer to understand and grasp and some people may not get it, but that was, I didn't think I was going to go there. If a girl leaves her man for you, um, would you, um, feel a part of you, feel like she would do the same to you? Yes, okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't think I would. Uh, I know for a fact that I wouldn't trust that situation.
Speaker 1:But what if she's your soulmate and she recognized you as her soulmate and not necessarily him and uh-huh? So would would that, I guess, now bringing that to you? How would you feel?
Speaker 2:um like she comes, and I would just I mean hypothetically, just to, to, to, to piggyback off you. I would assume I would feel the same. Like damn, like this girl is.
Speaker 2:Leave your man for me. Maybe it depends on how she does it. Maybe it depends on how she does it. Maybe, like Because in my head, when you said leave your man for me, I'm thinking, like she meets me, boom, oh, she likes me. I'm the shiny new toy and fuck this relationship, I'm gonna go to him. I'm not gonna feel secure in that and I don't. Yeah, I wouldn't feel secure in that, so I wouldn't even see myself, first of all, like I would be in the middle of them being together, and then I would damn her be obligated to get with her in a way yeah, I mean if she's not obligated but that's the feeling that I would be giving off.
Speaker 2:It's like you know you leave your man, you gonna get with me. Yeah, I don't see me saying that, you know okay, okay, so so there's no. So if she has a boyfriend, you're not giving her any energy I mean, if she gives me energy, you know I I wouldn't go too far with that you know like if, if, if.
Speaker 2:I'm assuming we have some type of connection and we kind of realized this can go further. But the whole leaving your man for another to me like it's so many work husbands out there- yeah, that do that you know I'm saying I you can kind of. You've worked many places you know, have you seen that a lot exactly it's like I kind of side-eye that whole thing in general.
Speaker 2:I've seen it many times Girl goes to work, the work husband treating her like you know she's second-guessing her relationship. That shit happened to me, you know. It's like I just don't really like that you know, so it wouldn't make me feel amazing. I told you like I'm, so it wouldn't make me feel amazing. I told you like I'm super big on karma for me and you know that's one of them things where I feel like that's gonna come back on me yeah, um, I, I totally understand exactly where you're coming from.
Speaker 1:Let's make that clear. And I, in most cases, I lean on that side. Yeah, um, I don't take that stance, um, because if it feels right and if it feels right, it feels right. And um work husbands yeah, there are real things. But also, in a lot of cases, I can see where that man at home is not doing his job.
Speaker 2:We all can.
Speaker 1:Right and I feel like, hey, that person may not be right for that woman, or vice versa. There's truth to that.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So it's not like hey, he's a nasty guy for doing this thing. It's like hey, we also share a connection and. I enjoy my time with you. So, like I said, it's not like hey, there is a point to where it's like Brad, you like, you kind of foul a little bit that there's that world. But also, if you really like that person then and you naturally gravitate to that person, it's hard to to just shy away from that too I can understand that too I can't understand that.
Speaker 2:Um, I can understand it more if it's like, clearly, y'all not supposed to be together like he.
Speaker 2:He's a domestic abuser, that's you know, just something. That's insane. It's like bray, y'all shouldn't be together. I could, I could understand it more if it's like that. But if it's like a okay, dude and y'all just don't, you know, y'all don't, don't, don't mesh as much as we do, then you know you got a decision to make on yourself. Like I don't want, I don't want to be a part of the decision making process of you breaking up with your guy. I should be outside of that. You should do that yourself To me. You should do that yourself. And then you know, if that opens up, then I'll try harder. But yeah, I see more of the foul side to that situation.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I mean because it is out of bounds. Yeah, yeah, I mean because it is out of bounds. So, yeah, I don't want to. I feel like there can be. There's always a layer of black and white, but there's also living in the gray and, yes, that is a foul person for stepping out of bounds knowing they're in a relationship. But we all have relationship, we all have energy, we all have connections. Some people are meant to be for others.
Speaker 1:That's why I talk about soulmates, the fact that is it less foul if they wind up breaking up and those two people got together and they had a long-lasting relationship where the other relationship was on the brink of disaster. Yeah, so how foul really was it? They was actually meant to be together. That person just was kind of in the way of that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I can see that.
Speaker 1:But it's different if you're married because y'all made an oath to God and that's a lifetime commitment. That's super. Yeah, that's a level. But when y'all both technically single, you're just in a relationship like not even an oath commitment. Y'all just have a boundary that say, hey, we're together, we're going to be exclusive.
Speaker 2:But you know how would you feel if you were dating this girl and you thought she was your soulmate that's sort of the same thing that you're saying and then thought she was so make that a. That's sort of the same thing that you're saying. And then it comes out later that um, uh, uh, well, you are. You already gave your your spill on that, so let's say the same exact thing, but she didn't tell you that she was actually married to the man. How would you feel?
Speaker 1:then she was married to him. Yeah, as in like you said.
Speaker 2:You know we might be have a connection that might be better than your person and da da, da butda. But you didn't know this at first. But when it came down almost to that time frame of like her breaking up, moving on, da-da-da, she actually was married.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would say I thought it was her boyfriend, but she actually married.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but she's like I'm signing the divorce papers today.
Speaker 1:And, first of all, you're not my soulmate if you're going to completely lie to me. Yeah, you're lying to me actively.
Speaker 2:She lying to him.
Speaker 1:She was lying to him talking to you anyway, so I don't know what she's lying to him about. You, nigga, like I mean. So Work was great, that's it.
Speaker 2:Work was great's it.
Speaker 1:Work was great, that's the truth she's talking to you the whole time. She's the reason, you're the reason she didn't quit. Yeah, like You're giving a vague Like scenario.
Speaker 2:She's giving a vague scenario To her man.
Speaker 1:So yeah, so I, I gotta know what in the In the realm of what's happening In their own situation. She is, I gotta know what in the realm of what's happening in their own situation, Like, if I'm enjoying my time, I'm not gonna be. I ain't the guy that's gonna be like we need to run off together. I just don't see me ever doing that Just pack your bags.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly Like we actually meant for each other. I'm not that type of Like that's a cut blocker world. You're the soulmate guy, you know what I mean. I'm, I'm, you're the soulmate guy, you know. So I'm not going to do that, so so, but I'll play the game that you're giving me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, in that saying, if you're actually saying, hey, this is, this is actually my husband, I'd like, when you've been spending me this whole time, you're a liar, that's a huge character issue, like yeah, and that's, that's the outcome and I don't play about the oath commitment to God and now you're breaking that up for it. Nah, we're not doing that yeah, yeah so cause now you gotta bring that back home into our relationship? No, I'm not so that one. That's not. I'm not going for that. Yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't fuck with that shit either. Okay, I'll be too. I'll be too bad if somebody lied to me and they were married. Yeah, oh my god, that's like that's. You're not supposed to do that, bro, at all absolutely not get killed off of that absolutely, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So I and when I'm asking this question, what my vision? I'm picturing two people outside of necessarily us Like, like if I see somebody at work who's in a relationship and they're talking to somebody who's single and they're having a, they're getting close with each other and sometimes you can see it and be like'all are, you know, completing each other's sentences. Y'all have a high electric energy with each other. Y'all get to know each. Y'all know each other. Well, she's talking, even though it's pillow talking, and that's a line of she's talking about the relationship y'all actually deserve each other. Yeah, so I can see that and you know, I understand you don't want to break your man's heart, but you're not feeling him the way you're feeling him.
Speaker 2:I get what you're saying.
Speaker 1:I may say it and just being real, the guy in me doesn't want to be that. You know what I mean like. I still want to keep it P and be like you know, but I think and that's why I try to be where I was leaning to before about like I'll respect it if you tell me you want to talk to other people Is because that line I just want to keep honesty in where we're at Like I'll respect it more if you're just like hey, you know what the spice level ain't there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah and you know I'm starting to look elsewhere. Give me the opportunity to step up a little bit more, like, hey, you know what, let me do more, you know. Or I can be like you know, what. That's way more than what I can do, hey, he.
Speaker 2:I don't want With the wind girl.
Speaker 1:Hey, I don't want to step on nothing y'all got going, because also that spares me, because I can maybe that energy. I'm not willing to step up for you, but I may be able to step up for somebody else because I like them more.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. That is a thing.
Speaker 1:So it's fair. It's like, hey, I just want an opportunity to get the chance. I don't like to being, you know, somebody doing things behind my back and I'm keeping a p and you actually. No, I didn't really care to be in this relationship, it was just I couldn't find a way to, you know, break it to you like you could have always did that. I've gave you every opportunity. I made that abundantly clear. I've I've talked about like I'm looking you know how do you want to play this Relationship, are you? Do you want to Talk to others? Do you Want to just talk? Do you want to Break up and just talk? You know, I mean and keep An open mind. I'm always. I'd rather you bring it to me and instead Of keeping it and just doing the side thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah yeah, because that's like it's hard to come back from that once I find out that that's the case.
Speaker 3:Yeah, but just give me an opportunity to take a chance.
Speaker 1:Because I'm human, I understand One. I see it in other people. And then what do you think? I don't see a pretty girl when he walks in the room, Like I don't see anybody who has good energy. Yeah like I'm completely blind to it. No, I get it, so can see if, if it can happen to me, it can damn sure happen to you yeah yeah, I'm fair in that way.
Speaker 2:I think the main reason of why, um, the main reason of, you know, even if I did so quote have this amazing connection with this girl who has a man, excuse me, I just always think about, there's always somebody like prettier, has more money, taller, better certain things than, um, someone else. So just because I'm coming in your life, right, right, like this, I feel like all right if we having something, and then there's another guy that can possibly come in and he's hitting marks that I'm not hitting, it's just like I'm going to look at what you did with your guy and that would make me feel like insecure about you, so I wouldn't even mess with that yeah, everybody's their own individual.
Speaker 1:If you're, if you're, if that's what you're looking for, then she, I think she, in time she can, she's going to truly reveal herself to you.
Speaker 2:If she's like hey, I'm looking for a guy with a check, she's going no no, I'm just saying like for me to to in that pocket of time, I would be fulfilling something that I will be filling a void. So to me, I'm looking at what you're doing with me as a red flag.
Speaker 1:I mean, I think that's fair to analyze it that way, but a connection is a connection yeah.
Speaker 2:I still feel like it could happen.
Speaker 1:Still could happen, still after yeah, I mean, yes, they can get bored, for sure, and they can get tired of you and you vice versa, yeah, yeah, I mean, and all all those things are possibility, but that's what taking risk is about, like that, and I and I'm saying that because that's in any relationship you're doing that Any, regardless if they have a boyfriend or not. You're taking a risk with that single person too.
Speaker 2:OK, yeah, they can be. I thought you were saying yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so. So even if this if you're both coming together single, she can be tired of you later on, just like if she was in a relationship.
Speaker 4:Yeah, so that's Might as well. She got a nigga yeah.
Speaker 1:If you want to break it down like that, fine, yeah, but I'm I, like I said, I stand on my mind, is going to go there too.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But also I am going to feel like, hey, we're all individual and we all offer something different because we have our own unique experience, experiences, personalities, perspectives, and we can. We can maybe clash together because and and it's not you're taking a risk, she's taking a risk on you, yada, yada, yeah, yeah. So, but that's always a conversation you can have with her and say, hey, I do love you, but this thing it's, you know, I just want some validation yeah like you're breaking up with the man for me, and how?
Speaker 1:how do I know you won't do this to me? So there's a question you can and just leave it there. What's she going? To say I would never, who knows, but if you don't ask the question, so like Well, lies got to come out after that. Maybe, but you're looking at her, you're analyzing, like that's a damn lie, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Or she'd be like you know what I would leave your ass. I knew it. You want Chick-fil-A.
Speaker 1:I don't know what the answer is, but she's going to be like sometimes it's not about the answer itself, it's about how you answer it.
Speaker 2:How you react.
Speaker 1:How the answer is. You know answer it. How you react like, how, how the answer is you're like you know, there's just something about you, you know like, and however it's like, I don't even get it. And then you're like okay, I, it's the feeling that you get you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So it's not really just like, hey, I don't know, you know what I mean, and just keep it pushing like no, that don't really make me feel good yeah, yeah or like I love you, or you can see something generic, like you're just saying that yeah, yeah, but if there's like I don't know what it is with you, it's just a connection that we got together, I've never felt anything like this, and she could maybe say that simply or plain. But it's really how should they say it? And now you, how the connection. You feel she could be absolutely lying, but you don't. I mean, you can never. True. If somebody's lying, it's hard to really, you know, to there's a level of trust that you got to be invulnerable because anybody or anybody can lie to you at any moment and you, there's a level of trust to that regardless. And you, vice versa, I'm not sure. I'm sure you there's. You haven't said the truth 100% of the time ever.
Speaker 1:Yeah of course so yeah, yeah, I'm sure you lied to your girlfriend about something whether it's small or not. Yeah, yeah, so absolutely yeah yeah, okay, so I like the discussion of where we're at um. Would you leave a girl for another if you feel like she's the?
Speaker 2:one no no, I wouldn't break up with somebody to get with somebody else I don't see me doing that because you know I was in a relationship a long-term relationship and then you know there's ups and downs with that. There are times where you just don't really like your person. And then you might see somebody else pretty, or y'all might have a conversation or like they're, you know, super cool. You're like, damn, I wonder what that would be like if I would have met them at another time. But that shit eats me. I'm just like not a F boy at heart.
Speaker 2:Like I can't, I can't do it. It's just something about going back to your person and seeing them like messed up over something that you've done. I'd rather stick it out with that person, or or not stick it out, but like completely in things, and then you know, if know, if that happens later, sure, but I'm not breaking up with somebody to get with somebody. Yeah, I'm not doing that.
Speaker 1:Would you do that? I'm with you. Um, I think that, uh, this time is like you. What you mentioned is like dang. You know, if I would had had been with Yadda Yadda, then maybe there could be a future. And you know, my rule is like, I don't do numbers or Instagram or anything like that. We're exchanging, because it's just not. You'll get caught. Get caught, no, no, no. I don't want to put myself in a temptation.
Speaker 1:Error, so it's like hey, I'll leave it where it's at right at this moment. Yeah, yeah, uh, so I'm, I'll, I'll lean toward that and I'll take the l's, like you know what, but, like I said, I'm not a soulmate guy. Yeah, so I think there's for every one of those that I like dang that was.
Speaker 2:She seemed like a great person there's another person who's going to come along. Yeah, yeah, I do agree with that.
Speaker 1:There are a lot of a lot of people out there. So whatever is meant to ha, like, I don't always like what. What is meant to be is meant to be is like that's the like, that's like the most obvious thing. I don't want to just generically say that, but there is truth into like, hey, I'm what. If I'm supposed to be here, then I am, and if that person comes along again magically, then it may be meant to be yeah yeah, exactly, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, uh, I think we both kind of land there and I think we both would have said yeah, because I just feel like and you said F-boy, like living in that F-boy world. I think that's very black and white too because, I wouldn't consider that necessarily an F-boy move. If you're breaking up with somebody to be with somebody else, I think the F-boy comes in is when you're hiding. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah exactly.
Speaker 1:And hiding the information. That's where the F-boy comes along. But I think that yes, it's mean to a, but I think that yes, it's it's mean to assert it's.
Speaker 3:I don't even think it's mean I think it's just being real we're not meant to be. Yeah, exactly, it's not meant to be.
Speaker 1:It's a hard truth yeah yeah, and and that's where I think us men get caught up in is that we don't want to break the other person's heart mm-hmm but deep down they know it too, and in the the longer that y'all together you're not doing her a favor as well.
Speaker 2:Facts she could be with yeah, it's like you could find somebody who's really meant for you, and I understand.
Speaker 1:I want to make this thing work too, but, honestly, we can see the writing on the wall that this ain't working.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's definitely something that I had to learn too, for sure. Trying to overly commit and bruh, the house is burning. Yeah, yeah, it's like hey, we'll just stay right here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and then time will reveal itself and if that person finds another, even if you don't't, you're like hey, I, we did each other a favor. You found somebody, now you can move on, or y'all may come back together again. You're like you know what? I needed time to grow, and I got that time to myself, to what I need, and it may, may come back yeah, so I should just sign up to Temptation Island. Yeah, that would probably be terrible.
Speaker 2:And then be like you know what Threesome is my only Exactly? Yeah, I have no regrets. Yeah, I have no regrets. Yeah, yeah, oh my.
Speaker 1:God, yeah, that's crazy, and sometimes that's what you need too.
Speaker 1:A threesome, no, no, that's hilarious no I think that it's a level of uh, like everybody has their own, like some people need that. I don't think I necessarily need to break somebody's heart to realize I'm, I'm the, the person who's doing wrong, you know. But some people is like, hey, I'm actually a dirt bag and I didn't know that until now and she's the best woman for me and hopefully I can save this thing. Yeah, and some people need that and it could work out best. Because I hear it so many times Like you know, I cheated, I broke her heart. I never want to do that again. Yeah, yeah and that sometimes is necessary.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So it just just depends on the person. I don't think I need to see her face. I have the idea of what will happen if I do this action.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And so I, the long lack, the long lasting heartbreak or the torment she will feel, I can already feel it. Yeah, so why do the thing?
Speaker 2:just to get in that real quick feel I can already feel it, yeah, so why do the thing? Just to get in that real quick?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, even though as a man, you were like bro, yeah, I would definitely, but you would also know I, I feel it. It's like hey, there's a consequence to my action and I know me, I'm gonna feel, I'm like, I feel guilty about little things I do okay, let alone actually cheating and lying. I must, I gotta, I gotta feel clear in my mind.
Speaker 2:Yeah yep, no, I'm definitely like, as you know, like, yeah, I'm definitely, I just can't. It's, it always comes back, right, like I, I would assume it's just for the whatever, whoever I'm supposed to be like in this life, like you know, um, but that right any, any time I do something, it always comes back. And whether it's actually on me to tell the truth, just because mentally I cannot look at my person and I'm doing them wrong, I just I cannot do that Right?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I think that I mean, and that's fair, and do you think that you would have? Did you always know that from the beginning or did you see? You saw it in real time and like, yep, I needed to see that and I can't do that anymore Growing up.
Speaker 2:It started in high school. It started in like ninth, yeah, somewhere between like right after high school, yeah, right after high school. Yeah, right after high school. Uh, anytime I would like lie or something. There was a this. This is what I'm saying. Like it's just, it doesn't even make sense. Like there was a time, one time there was this girl that, um, I met at the club. I used to go to the club, wow but, um, I met.
Speaker 2:I met her at the club. This is like 20, I was like 20 maybe, and I think I was trying to dodge her to meet up with someone else and, um, and it was, and I did not that I did stuff like this all the time. I didn't do stuff like that all the time at all, but this is this one time I tried to dodge this girl to meet up with uh, with someone else. And I swear to god, I went to this apartment, this new apartment, um, in uh, by university, by the University of Memphis, and on the floor of where I was going to meet the other girl. Why is the girl allowed to? On the floor, going to the elevator? She's right there. She hit me with one of those. Yeah, she just saw me and she was like, hmm, what are you doing over here? I?
Speaker 2:um changed my mind like you know it's just random situations where I'm not even in control of how I'm getting caught in stuff yeah it don't matter what I do. So you know, after random stuff like that and growing up and seeing stuff like that, I just realized it's just not in my cards to be like a liar and to do that. It's always going to come back to me.
Speaker 1:So, yeah it's just not in me to do that I'm with you Because you know, trust to me is, of course, obviously a big deal. I just want to because, since I freely talk and I am somewhat of an open book, I don't give myself to everybody and just a book for everybody to read. There's some things I have closed off but a lot of things I free, because I'd rather you get to know me very quickly. But the things I get nervous about and scared of when it comes to love is being worried about psychopaths and sociopaths, and I was just looking up the definitions between the two so I could try to get them right, but they damn near seem like you know what I mean like brother and sisters of each other.
Speaker 1:So psychopath lack guilt, remorse, empathy. That's crazy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Pretending to feel emotions, oh, inability to form true emotional attachments. Yeah, okay, so this is a little bit. Yeah, tend to be, tend to be successful. So, yeah, I can see it. I mean he's a psychopath. Dishonesty, manipulative behavior, narcissism and superficial charm Okay, and sociopath lack of remorse. But guilt and empathy may be present in some cases. So some emotions are felt, raised, but are shallow and fleeting Okay. May form close attachments to one or few individuals, so it's like a softer form of psychopath.
Speaker 1:And then consistent irresponsibility and repeated violations of law, constant lying and deception, aggressive and reckless behavior. Uh-huh, yeah, so you know? Um, I think it's. It seems like, yes, sociopaths are just kind of like emotional and they, they're more narcissistic. Well, I mean, psychopaths are just, you know, clearly just narcissistic in behavior because they're lying, they don't, their inability to form true emotional attachments, yeah, yeah, so I know I'm not a psychopath. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sociopath too is like repeated violations of law, constantly lying and deception. So, yeah, like sociopath, psychopathic behavior is what I kind of try to like, to like. Hey, are you just saying the thing?
Speaker 1:because it sounds good yeah yeah, because what I have trouble um me is I do trust um until it's broken, but also your actions have to match. Yeah, so like, if you're sending me love letters, which I appreciate, your actions got a match the love letter that you sending me. Otherwise it's useless for you to send me love letters so she got to be smashing on you too.
Speaker 2:What do you mean? No, no, like love love letters.
Speaker 1:It comes like what about 14? No? A love letter can come in different forms, like them saying making, like how special you are to me. You're my light, I glow and you put a smile on my face every time. Yada, yada, like a love letter can come in many forms, and I was just like I want it. It ain't no like.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, I was saying you said that it has to match up like what you're you're you're doing. So I was like she can't be sending you love letters and not smashing. No, that's not what I'm saying. So I'm saying it was a joke yeah yeah, but I got that.
Speaker 1:It was a joke yeah, yeah, but what I was uh just saying was you? Essentially, what I was saying is you can't. You're telling me how much you mean to me, or I mean to you, but I I can't feel that from you. It's like I know that gucci bag means a lot to you, but how you take care of it, you know when you're done using it.
Speaker 1:You put it in a box, you put it in this wooden cage, you make sure you dust it off and clean it, then put it up in a high form so nobody touches it. You can tell me how much I mean to you, but you're, you're yelling you're always upset.
Speaker 1:There's no affection, but you write how I love you so much. I'd be like, yeah, that love letter sounds good when I read it, but I, but when your actions don't align, they're literally just what it is words on a paper yeah and yeah. So and that's how I like. Okay, that's great. I I'm reading the words that you're saying, but in in a weird way it sounds like a lie. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, how do you feel About that? Yeah, I agree with it to an extent. I feel like sometimes people don't even know what they're doing or what they're not doing. I've gotten letters before from people and I'll just like read it and I'll, in front of them, I'll be like thank you. But like in my head I'm like, like you know, this is, this is not really up to par you know right, yeah, this isn't really um fully like real life.
Speaker 1:Right, exactly.
Speaker 2:It's like you're a poet, it's like a halfway take.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're a poet, you know what I mean. You like writing them Because you want to make them feel good, but that's not actually. You don't move like this. Right, that's a fact.
Speaker 2:I got something else. I got two of them. Okay, here's one. I like the second one better. Do you believe humans are naturally good and corrupted by society, or naturally selfish, and like, civilized by society or naturally selfish, and like civilized by society.
Speaker 1:I think there's. I think there's that's. Both are true yes, like yeah, like I mean you could be uh selfish. I mean we have a self preservation about us, like is there's a certain level of selfish if a house is on fire and you know that somebody's in there, I have a possibility of of selfish. If a house is on fire and you know that somebody's in there, I have a possibility of dying. I'm not about to go in and save that person from that fire. Yeah, I mean, that's indeed selfish, but that's understandable.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So I'm saying like do you think like was born evil or do you think he his, his society? You know, I said like people like that, do you think like they just came out the womb, like that, or society kind of like that man that's, you know the.
Speaker 1:what is it? Live long enough to become a villain? Yeah right, I think that that's um, because I hate that, the I have things I can lean on to say that like good is like maybe subjective in a sense, but I guess I got to pick on my sister. It is what it is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so she used to when she was a baby we're a year and a half or so, is that? She used to bite my toes, and she was a baby. I was a baby. She would bite my toes and she was a baby. I was a baby. She would bite my toes and make me cry and run back into her cradle. Where did this just?
Speaker 1:go yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, so yeah and so like as a baby. She don't really. You know what I mean. I don't want to call her an evil person. That's not what she is. Yeah, but nonetheless there's a level of like the origin story. Yeah. Yeah, and then I grew up hating women. No, no, I'm just saying like personality and built in us, yeah, yeah. And so when she did that as a child, you know there's some behaviors that are long lasting.
Speaker 1:Like it's like why would she do that as a child? Like ain't she supposed to be good and nice? It's like nah, that's personalities are bit very quickly and so I it's. So I'm just using that as an example, um, because it's like why would a baby do anything that's mean? So my answer is to be sometimes, yeah. I think that sometimes we behave innately, more than what society thinks we are Like. Yes, does society corrupt us? Most of the time, yes. Is a baby innocent? Yes, most of the time, yes, is a baby innocent? Yes, but I think we, I think that also there's.
Speaker 1:There's also DNA that's passed on, that's built personality-wise, like you're, just like your daddy. So, sometimes you can't help the characteristics you bring to the table, and they happen when they're young too. So if that helps answer the question, I really don't want to be like nah, they born evil. Yeah, yeah, Because to the question I don't really know for real, but I think that our habits are built very quickly and it's not because they just saw it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I agree with the half and half. I don't know if I asked something like this before, but what do you want your legacy to be when people speak your name 100 years from now?
Speaker 1:Somebody who loved his family and somebody who put others before him. And I was like hey, my grandfather actually put us first. Hey, you know, my grandfather actually put us first. He knew that this was bigger than himself yeah, yeah, and so yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:But 100 years from now, do I think that people will scream my name like that? Probably not, but I do, truly, it's bigger than me. So any foundation I can I can build and I can be maybe a step in the whole ladder then okay, I'm all right that I don't have to be elon musk to change the world absolutely. But yeah, I can maybe change my family lineage and at least put that up to trajectory and give it a little bit of boost. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I agree with that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I agree with that I feel like, well, I guess I said 100 years from now. But I used to think about how you know what I do now in this lifetime, and you know, like I wasn't thinking 100, but I was thinking like hundreds of years later, like if you left a mark, you know, like a hundred. I wasn't thinking a hundred, but I was thinking like hundreds of years later, like if you left a mark. You know how they talk about Tesla, like Nikola.
Speaker 2:Tesla or Einstein or all these people and I don't know. I just feel like it just matters more while we're here, everything. I feel like everything matters more while we're here, because all this shit is going to be wiped out and I'm not going to remember. We remember Martin Luther King, but like, after a certain amount of years, like that shit is just going to be gone. You know what I'm saying Whatever the next, just gonna be gone. You know I'm saying the whatever the next big thing is.
Speaker 2:You know the ice age, the um that wipes everybody out like brother, the videos I'm doing ain't gonna mean shit you know I'm saying yeah, so I feel like, um, I feel like what you do while you're here is, like the most important thing, not necessarily like what you're trying to leave.
Speaker 1:And people you know die young. Yeah so you know we could be here today, gone tomorrow. Facts. Yeah, so it's like yeah, would I love to have a long strong, lasting impact. Yeah, that would be nice. Yeah, that would be cool. Yeah, yeah. But do I fully expect that to happen? Probably not, but you know I do the best that I can as I know as my life, as it is right now. Facts yeah, it's sort of the same thing how are you feeling?
Speaker 2:Oh, I feel good, okay. We're going to keep going. I think we can. Let me see there okay keep going. I think we can let me see, there's another one here yeah, yeah, I think we did good.
Speaker 2:I really enjoyed the episode. It was. It was fun, he was very engaging and time goes by quick, yeah, yeah. So what do you think about um society and where it is today and how easily it is for something that happened to uh, what's the dude's name that? Just, uh, charlie. Yeah, how easily inaccessible that is to people, and do you? Well, that's my first question.
Speaker 1:So say it one more time.
Speaker 2:I forgot to be honest, yeah, do you think how accessible that type of information, that visual information, is? Do you think or do? You think, or how do you think that affects us as a society? What the fact that you can open up your phone and you can see a dude getting just shot in the neck and bleeding everywhere? Like how do you think that affects the society as a whole? Because you know, like at first it would just be you reading it in the paper. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But now your son, daughter, whoever got an iphone, they open up instagram tick tock, whatever the first day at least. Yeah, that everywhere.
Speaker 1:I mean, um, yeah, do I, am I. You know, I don't want to be like hey br. You know, death is just a natural way of life and it's. I mean, should we be able to pick up a phone and see somebody die? No, but at the same time, we've there's you know, we come across car accidents and things like that that are very gruesome in just our own reality, and then the war is real across car accidents and things like that that are very gruesome and just our own reality.
Speaker 1:And then the war is real. You know world war ii. You know people invading people's country, killing most. You know rape, murder, yada, yada, all the things, above all that thing, you know. All that is reality, so it's just a part of being in reality. And people in Gaza suffer way more you know, so so they're seeing that in real time. So we see somebody get assassinated on TV or on our phone.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's not great but, the reality is that is life too. So you're seeing what all of life and what it presents. So I'm not there, like nobody should ever see that actually, people, it happens all the time. So to to I'm not gonna be the person I'm not gonna be like. Yeah, hey, three-year-old, see this you know what I?
Speaker 1:mean, but that's a conversation that needs to be had at some point, yeah, yeah, so I'm not gonna go my way to show nobody, but if they see it, I was like, hey, this is, we need to talk about this thing, this is a real thing and have a conversation on it, because it's very real, you know, and I yeah, and it's. It's tougher to deal with when it's you know your, your actual father, your husband. Yeah, for that for them to see it is extremely tragic. I wouldn't wish that on nobody as a family, but for somebody who can remove themselves from the situation because they don't have a relationship with that person's family, you can look at it like, hey, we're having a conversation because this could be anybody. Anybody can die from a bullet to the head, so just think about how fickle life is. Make sure we prep uh, I think we also have a degree to life insurance, definitely as adults, adult men in general. So I think that we should always try to at least prep as much as we can for that time yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like it's uh, that that is, that is true, that it is a real thing. I just feel like it's super traumatic to see something like that. It's just like bad energy to see that. You're kind of like inviting that in your home, but when you make the point about Gaza, I'm like damn.
Speaker 2:There are so many other moments in history where people will come in and rape the whole village and wipe out a whole civilization and, you know, kidnap people and all that and they seeing not just one person. Or just like you said with Gaza, they ain't seeing one. They seeing that shit probably ain't nothing to them.
Speaker 1:No more to just wake up and see a dead body. Yeah, I mean. Picture you going outside and you see a lynched black man from the tree oh my god, yeah, you know yeah yeah that's terrifying to see, yeah, yeah, and that you know there's no consequences for the action of killing that man. So there's a lot of traumatizing things, to where it's like, yeah, this is traumatic, but it could be much worse. There's more troubling times that have passed and maybe there's troubling times in the future.
Speaker 1:I'm sure that's going to be the case for others ourselves possibly. I'm not going to say I'm sure, but that's a scenario that may happen, it's humans, yeah, exactly. Yeah exactly. So I also live in that world where it's like, yeah, it's unfortunate that can be anybody, but there's been troubling times that our ancestors have seen Facts, facts, yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm good.
Speaker 1:I'm good too, all right. Well, this is two. For the culture, this is another good one. Hope you all enjoyed it. We'll be back, we'll be, back. Yes, sir.