Two for the Culture
Two for the Culture is brought to you be Steven Rey and Justin Devonte. This is the podcast for the ages! Both Steve and Justin has been friends for over a decade plus and will give you a genuine approach on news and culture with humor and love. I promise this will be one of your favorite podcasts that you will not get enough of!
Two for the Culture
Real Friends Check You When You're Tripping
We dive into the power of showing up and how consistency has been key to building our podcast. The simple act of committing to record week after week has created a foundation for growth that fancy equipment never could.
• Just showing up is the most pivotal thing you can do in pursuing any goal
• The podcast has grown through consistent commitment rather than perfect production
• Vulnerability in relationships includes financial honesty, which many men struggle with
• Having friends who check you when you're wrong is essential for personal growth
• Yes-men are often created when we punish people for giving honest feedback
• Love letters and grand gestures feel empty when daily actions don't match the words
• Creating safety in relationships allows both partners to be their authentic selves
• Women feel most comfortable being vulnerable when they feel both physically and financially secure
Keep showing up for the things that matter to you. Consistency beats perfection every time.
And we are back for two for the culture. I'm Justin Devante. I'm Steven Ray. Yes, sir. We're back. How you feeling? I feel good, man.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Come on. Like shout out to the toasting. Greatness. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To greatness. Yeah. That's not good enough. Okay. To showing up on the podcast. Okay, there you go.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, oh, I'm tripping. My bad big out. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:We definitely be showing up.
SPEAKER_01:For sure. Yeah, yeah. We're a little bit delayed because I've been, you know, running a cold lately. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:No, I told my homie that too. About um just showing up, bro. Just showing up is like the best thing you can do.
SPEAKER_01:I got you.
SPEAKER_00:And what was that in regards to? Um, you know, you know, um, uh uh, we were talking about like like I don't know, life in general, and he did not just like give all his business out, but like he he he's just trying to there are certain people that like don't take steps and not to say like he don't or whatever, but I'm I'm giving a broader uh uh visual of like what the whole conversation was about. And certain people in life they don't they don't necessarily like take that chance or that that thing to it could be a dream, it could be uh a feeling, uh uh intuition of like, man, I I really need to get into this or that or whatever. And or a fitness. I need I need to get you know, like get fit and all this type of shit. And um I was just giving some advice and it just really made me think about um myself and where I am at today, and just showing up is like the biggest, most pivotal thing that I've done. And like even with us, and that that that came up too, like the podcast. And it was somebody else, and I was like giving advice to. And like, you know, I got a camera, I got this this this stupid ass mic, this da-da-da-da. Like, what's your advice on starting a podcast? You know, and then like you know, if you remember when we started, the big the most important thing was making it to the next week. Like it ain't this, it ain't this, the the the camera, the light, the the is can we meet on Monday? And then, you know, now we got to the point where it's like, what time are you ready versus do you want to do the podcast today? Yeah, right. Yeah, right. Yeah, and it's like that's so it's so important, bro. Like we couldn't we couldn't have made it here. I know it's not, it's not, we're we're not like where we're gonna be yet, and we're not like where we started, but it's like just show up, bro.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, for sure. And I yeah, and everything else is gonna come with it as long as long as you know, because we continue to get better, um, the production and understanding repetition, yeah, it's now it's now it's a habit. Right. Um, and I think that you know, the uh viewership and you'll see like even though it's not like big growth, you still see small growth. Yeah, you see people tuning in on a weekly basis. Um, so I I totally agree. Um, even because I was like, you was like in the beginning, like, dude, where's the you know, where's the TikTok numbers come from? Because we get like three views. I was like, hey, yeah, I'm with you. I don't see, yeah, I don't see the like evolution in it. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. And then, you know, now we're getting a lot more view count. And I was like, okay, now this makes more sense. Um, because the soulmate ones, uh, the soulmate, uh, I feel like that was a that was a good clip that was like um yeah, yeah, yeah, that went up, at least for uh TikTok.
SPEAKER_00:I I don't even know. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Well, like compared to our numbers on TikTok, it went up. It's not like it's like uh your view number count, but it's yeah, yeah, yeah, right. But I'm just saying for our small TikTok, it it actually you know what's funny, and not not to diminish anything you just said.
SPEAKER_00:So let me start off with that, not to diminish anything what you said. I don't be liking when my friends do that. What? They be like, it ain't your numbers. I don't be liking it because y'all don't be knowing, nigga, like zero to 50 views is great, like even me with quote the numbers. It's like I'm looking at this like, bruh, like we had zero views last week. Now we got like 700.
SPEAKER_01:That's a thing. Yeah, yeah, I I understand, yeah. GQ me soda. No, it's all about perspective though, it's what really what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah. So I'm saying, hey, it's not it's not what the view count that you know you're used to seeing, yeah. But it is traction and it is growth, is what I was saying. So I was I wasn't trying to diminish what we were. No, no, no, no.
SPEAKER_00:Like that that's why I started off with that that I'm not trying to diminish what you're saying, because I completely get it. It's just like, um, again, like I'm me, so I don't I don't know. I don't know what it's like to even see who I am on the outside or my you know, the the the growth or the views or the what I don't even know what it's like to see that. But um, yeah, like I that that happens a lot for me now. It's just like it ain't your numbers.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But it what is it a flyer or something?
SPEAKER_01:No, I'm listening.
SPEAKER_00:No, I know I'm just I'm looking at you. Uh but yeah, yeah, yeah. That that that is a thing. And I I say that to say, you know, in case it's somebody listening that that feels that way, like, you know, my my my my view count or my sales or my it's cool, but it ain't like your or it ain't like whoever's dog, like us growing this thing, and and I'll be telling you, I'll be like, bro, we got eight views. Yeah, right. Yeah, I'm like, bro, we got eight people sitting in for an hour, like watching us. Is that not crazy?
SPEAKER_01:I mean, that's not impressive to me, but yeah, yeah. Like impressive, and I'm just saying that's coming from my old podcast too. Facts, facts, facts because from here we have um, because we didn't ever really do video until the end, which was our downfall um for a lot of different reasons. Um, but but we had a very strong podcast following on a weekly basis from tune in from different parts of the country. Yeah, so it would that the podcast was very, very strong. It was like a word of mouth. We had and it just it just grew just the podcast itself. Yeah, but it we never put the video in place, and if we did that, it would have probably been a lot bigger. So I I saw what we can do, and I and I heard feedback from a lot of different people on the podcast and how much they enjoyed it. So, so when I see that, like, yeah, that's not, you know, I I've been there before, I guess is what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And and so eight people is is like that's a stark contrast to where I was in the past. Yeah, yeah. And I I saw those numbers correctly.
SPEAKER_00:It's different. It's like, I don't know, like like audio, like you can do that while you work in. Yeah. But video is like, I'm watching these niggas. Yeah, yeah. Like I'm I'm sitting down, I'm watching. But I get I get exactly what you say. Cause I do, I do, I I do listen to I only listen to Theo Vaughn, to be honest. Like the only podcast that I really yeah, if I type in podcast, Theo Vaughn is like the first one. But um I'll listen to him sort of in the background while I'm doing busy work. So like for to for people to do that for us is like crazy. And also to to to piggyback on what you said, um what you did with that last podcast was like literally I knew this would work. What do you mean? What like y'all made it say how many episodes? 50 something?
SPEAKER_01:Way uh way more than that. Way more than that. Yeah, because we did like two years close to two years? I think so. I know we did more than a year for sure.
SPEAKER_00:All right, well, either way. Yeah, right, right, right. When I saw like episode 52 or shit like that, I was like, damn, like these folks like really, you know, and um uh uh I I I just knew your part in it and like how you showed up every day. Right. And I knew this would work. Right. Because like you know, me online, you can see it. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Whether you you you again like my friends and all that, the content ain't for y'all, it ain't for my family, you know, it's it's just a side thing that I'm you know, Steven is here, but like race is it's it's a side thing. And it's not for y'all, but like I know y'all see it. Yeah, and me showing up all the time, I felt like that plus you, and like uh uh knowing the last podcast that you you you were a part of and all that, and how you showed up and all that, I knew this would work.
SPEAKER_01:So, yeah, and that's one of the things to where um that's I agree with you, is that you take uh you have a lot of the skills that I don't have that that makes it great because the last podcast, it was I had to learn everything, yeah. Yeah, like me, like starting off with the podcast, how do you record? What devices you use, yeah, purchasing the equipment, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:All this would be learning how to edit, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So all of it, like it was it was great for the time because I was fascinated. Yeah, and then I was like, oh my goodness, I want to learn. Oh, I'm learning how to edit, I'm learning a new skill, you know, and I had the time for it. So all of that was like very like excited to do. Um even the time to where I was like trying to figure out how to video edit and do all this stuff, all of that was exciting at one point. Now it's it's learning something. It's like, oh, it's like it's more of an undertaking trying to learn it all. Right, right, right. Um but so you take a lot of heavy lifting that I was like, okay, I can bring off the you know the the podcast stuff. I have the equipment, I have the the know-how to clip it down to what I needed to, um, at least the podcast form. But you know, I didn't have that, you know, that uh that co you know that co-star that I could throw the ball to like hey he got this, I got this. Yeah, we should have it should have always been uh a collective effort, even if one person, I was like, I don't mind doing the heavy lifting, but I can't be the only, you know, I was like, bruh, I'm the only camel here lifting up all the everybody's weight, you know what I mean? Yeah, and it's just it just came very and it just it just it was just just too bearing, and I just eventually got too it was just too much. Yeah, so and then everybody else had their own lives and then their own life changes, right? So it was eventually gonna wear out anyway because I didn't have the enough taking to at the end we start to work to video record. Um, but I was like, let me just learn how to do it and put it out there to the universe. Um, but there's yeah, we it could have been uh different things. Um a lot of it was on some of it was on me. Um so I you know I always try to hold myself accountable of the things that could have been different for sure. But no, yeah, I think this works great for absolutely no for sure.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, but I think after here we'll we'll talk about that after to expand and all that type.
SPEAKER_01:And another thing that works, because what I was um one of my concerns about doing the podcast was like how much can you really dive in on? Yeah, because you're you're uh you're a certain degree separated for some of the topics that we talked about before. Absolutely, yeah, yeah. It was like, hey, you can't really go in to talk about this one celebrity because you may meet them one day.
SPEAKER_00:I might meet them, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so I was like, yeah, I was like, and then even me talking about it can be a representation of you.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so I appreciate that. Yeah, I really appreciate you even thinking about that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. So I was like, I I don't know what because we used to go in, you know. You're talking about I'm like, I am Yeah, you're like I'm gonna leave it alone, you know. But trying to just give an arm on this conversation, and I still and I still would do that, but you know, you still keep it in mind. Uh and but a lot of it, a lot of our conversation you will too. It's gonna happen. Yeah, and a lot of our conversation now is just more um, it's not just on a specific like news topic. Yeah, it's just like talking about life. Like I got a bunch of questions um about life.
SPEAKER_00:All right, well, yes, you know what that was for us, yeah. That was clearly for us. I I I fuck with you, bro. Uh love you I love you too, bro.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, I got you. I didn't I didn't know if you was gonna be able to say it like some men can't, like just hell no. Uh okay, I got you.
SPEAKER_00:I uh yeah, for sure, bro. You damn you yeah, out of my my my friends, you're you're definitely in the top for if you haven't realized.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. No, I uh same likewise. Uh yeah, that's that's okay.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. You know, you gonna cheers again? Yeah, yeah, yeah. To us.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, exactly. Cheers to friends, friendship. All right, let's get into it. So I feel like you know, we already talked, we're already kind of talking about it a little bit. It's vulnerability. Okay. Um, so this in terms of a partner. Right. Um, I got several questions on it. How long does do you think it takes you to be open up and to be vulnerable with the partner? Do you feel like it just depends on the person? Like, like in terms of hey, I can talk to you. Is there maybe certain partner or somebody you're talking to or you meet, like, I feel like I can truly open up to you. Do you feel that ever?
SPEAKER_00:I I feel yeah. That's that's usually the only type of people that I end up speaking to for a while.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, I'm gonna stop you real quick.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:All right, compare your um your two last relationships. Yeah. The one that was public and the one that was not that I'm for more familiar with. Okay. So one was a public relationship. How long, if you don't mind talking about, how long did it take you to be vulnerable with her? Because she was very popular when you first started talking to her. Was it hard to be vulnerable with her in the beginning?
SPEAKER_00:Um was it hard to be vulnerable with her? No, no, no, like anybody I'm in a relationship with, to even get to a relationship with me, I mean it was probably a bit easier. But well, whatever. Even to get into a relationship, um it takes a lot for me to do that. And to be in a relationship with anyone, vulnerability is a part of that. So yeah, no. Like it wasn't, it wasn't hard for me to be vulnerable. It wasn't hard for me to be vulnerable with her. Um it did take some time. For sure, though.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, like um, yeah, like did she ever know your true circumstances? Uh like in terms of like um I'm gonna stop you.
SPEAKER_00:I'm gonna stop you. Okay. Yeah, no, you was about to you was about to go in.
SPEAKER_01:No, no, no, I don't think I was gonna go in. Like you was a broke nigga.
SPEAKER_00:You was broke. Did you tell him?
SPEAKER_01:Okay, you know me better than I thought you did.
SPEAKER_00:I was trying to see how you was gonna say it, but I was just like, save it. Like, let me let me do it for you.
SPEAKER_01:I got you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm talking about in the beginning. This is all in the beginning. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Nigga, seeing that girl, man, dog. First of all, I mean, you know, you know, she's Courtney now. And I'll I'll say this, whatever. Yeah. Clearly, we've been drinking. But um, yeah. Um at the time she was hurt, baby. Yeah, right, right, right. Yeah. Um yeah. Yeah, hell no. Why am I lead with that?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, this is like why I'm gonna leave with that. Yeah, because it's all about vo well, yeah, that's that's too much. Like, of course, you like because I I think we all have that in in us as men. We gotta get back on track. Yeah, no, but we all have that as men, like, hey, should um because okay, so more than 50% of us don't have enough for savings. Um and so that's a lot of men, and uh it's more than 50%. It's majority of people don't have yeah, have a savings or enough for savings or pay enough to pay their bills for the next month. Yeah, yeah. So there's a medi income. We're all paycheck to paycheck for the most part. Yeah. Um, so that being said, um that that's gonna be true for a lot of men. It's definitely gonna be true for uh a lot of black men because if that's the average, black people, it's just the average is uh have it the worst. Yeah, so um so so uh where was I going with this? Uh I don't know, me being broken. Yeah, okay. No, no, that's not right. That's not that's not wrong. Yeah, yeah. But so a lot of us don't have it, and we there's a conversation that we don't like we necessarily don't we don't need to ever I don't think we're ever gonna lead to it, but we're also there's a proud element to it as well. To whereas like hey proud element, what do you mean? Like, like I made it through it. I can't yeah, yeah. I'm going to push through even though I don't got it. And and I and I have that a lot in me too.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, yeah, it's so silly in a bottle.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, because I'll even speak on myself. There's a lot of times I don't got it at all. You know, and I'm like, I gotta, you know, there's this, you know, date night that's expected, you know, things are, you know, I have more money than I thought I was gonna that I thought I was gonna have, or less money, and I still gotta act like everything's cool and okay. Um, even though I hate that this, you know, that this bill's coming. But I said I was gonna do it, so we're here now. Um, but now it's more to be like, hey, I'm only hurting myself, because it was a conversation that um I had with my girlfriend. Um this was like we had broke up and we was like getting kind of things back together, and it was a point element. I was just like, let me be honest about the um what was going on during this time. Yeah. And I was like, you know, when we had tripped that to take that trip to DC, um like that was pretty much all my savings, yada yada. I did that for you, you know, and um and it was an element of like I don't care. Like that that was not however I said it didn't penetrate like I thought it would. Yeah, yeah. And I and so because I was like, now I had this job. This was when we I was still doing interviews and process, and I still wanted to be make this special because we had talked about it before, and you know, that I was going to sleep at charging stations trying to get some rest during in between my work hard, you work hard, yeah, yeah. And you know, um, so now it's a it's a just a tad bit different, but I still have elements of like, you know, I gotta spend this, that, and that. Um, but I didn't say that for a long time and I just kept it in. Yeah, yeah. And then um that became another conversation. But now it's like I'm not I'm only hurting myself, pushing through for what? You know, like I need to be vocal and communicative about how I truly feel. Yeah. Um, because it's only hurting me. So if I can't give you the real reality of my situation because I uh care what you think of me, that's not doing me any favors. Facts. Yeah, yeah. So so that that's why I'm like, of course, it's an element of vulnerable, like, hey, you're in my business too. But there's a reality of like, hey, I don't got it like that. And that's kind of where I'm landing now. It's like, bruh, hey, I'm I'm letting you know I'm pushing through because you want this thing, but I don't got it like that. And I'm not going to pretend anymore. You know what I mean? Because I'm only truly hurting myself. Yeah, facts. Yeah, yeah. Because I'm on at the end of the day, I'm gonna have to pay for this.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. Cause there's emergencies that like there's emergencies that's gonna come around the corner that you're not gonna expect or that you're not gonna be aware of, and that you trying to push through may hey, that tire may pop. You know what I mean? And then you gotta pay an extra couple hundred bucks that you didn't have. Facts. So I gotta be truthful, is like, hey, you know what? Hey, if you don't, if date night is what's keeping us together, then maybe we shouldn't be. Right. Yeah.
unknown:No.
SPEAKER_01:So I was yeah, I was talking about vulnerable, but we can kind of move a little bit past that because Well, hold on, let me go then.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Alright, so uh, first question on chat GPT. Yeah. Uh literally, like either way. Uh do people fall in love with the person or with how the person makes them feel?
SPEAKER_01:Do people fall in love with the person or the person make them feel? Or how they make them feel. I mean, I think they fall in I think they fall in love with the person.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, because how they make you feel is fleeting. I can be, you know, um emotionally abusive too. I mean, like, is that is that a lie though?
SPEAKER_00:Emotionally abusive? Like, like I know that's I know you, but that's a very strong word. Make me abuse.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got you. No, I'm just saying, not me. Like, like my bad. No, I'm just no, no. I'm just saying the person can be emotionally. I'm sorry. But I mean, and this element of truth to everybody, like anybody can be emotionally abusive and say you're not shit. Facts. So, so and and them give a truthful situ of how they see it. Right. Yeah, and yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't have to clear it up for me, by the way. Yeah, yeah. And and and that's so, but that's can be what's deemed emotionally abusive. Like, you know what I mean? I'm not gonna call you the B word, but I'm you know what I mean. They'll be like, hey, how you I'll be sugarcoated enough to wear that's what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. I struggled with that too. Yeah, women. Um, I will say, like, the B word is is very uh unfortunately, I I have said it before, but um that's too let me not like walk off a cliff. But but but but but what I'm saying is is um that that telling people what they are, you know, um it's very hard to do that, like in a nice way.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah right. I mean, because you you it's it's an element of putting them down. Oh god, but if they if if you don't put the mirror to their face, how do they really see? How do you see yourself?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, okay, so that's that's what thank you for clearing it up. Um that is exactly what I'm saying. What I'm saying is is that there are times where people surround themselves with yes men and yes women that could be your friends, that I don't consider you a yes man. You know what I'm saying? And you probably likewise, I don't at all. Yeah, yeah, you probably don't consider me a yes man. And um there are people, and um I've seen it a lot of times with women, um, and probably not men, because I probably uh I'm really good at picking friends and energy that I'm around, so I don't even see that shit. But uh I've seen it where people will they don't even know that they're doing it, but they like have yes people like around them. And then like being that person to be like going back to what I said, like the B word, it's like you're kind of being let me just be me, like you're kind of being a bitch right now, like you know, like that type of shit, sometimes you need to hear that, you know what I'm saying? Uh but but not for me, like saying saying that specifically, but like sometimes you need to hear I don't know, I'm hearing what I'm saying, and I feel like that's a clip that's that's just like go out, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So But I know what I'm saying, yeah, yeah like and I agree, and look, and I can add on to that too. Okay, yeah, because the the so you you're right in the way that you're saying, hey, people put yes men around them and and not really knowing it, and and also people are creating um the the people that may have been no men, yes men too, by by scolding them or punishing them when when when they're actually trying to give you the truth. They're trying to give you the truth, yeah, yeah. So you're you're creating a yes man when you say I'm cutting them off or I ain't talking to them. You know what I mean? You're talking, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So so for example niggas off and be like, I'm only you ghosting to ghost mean.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, or even Actually, the no man loved you. Yeah, exactly. A hundred percent. And you're ghosting the friends that okay, they already you may have not responded, like I hate that what you said to me. They may have checked you when you was tripping, and then you not respond for two months. And they're like, Well, I know that I don't want to create this thing fraction between us because I do love you, so I'm gonna leave it alone. So you you're creating no uh yes man, and and now it's not bettering yourself because I think that we're both open up to criticism. I yeah, we may not love it, but I don't like it at all. Yeah, but like but it's it's essential. You're like, we gotta know when we're trip when we're tripping or doing wrong. Absolutely. How do we grow? How? Yeah, if everybody's saying, hey, you're doing everything right, then you're that's re that's affirmation, that's reassurance, and you're gonna think that you're doing everything right. But they're just that they're saying you're when you do things right, they're clapping on, but when you do things wrong, they don't say anything. So you never get the feedback that you need to make yourself better. And then you wonder why. Oh, why this relationship ended after three months? It must have been them.
SPEAKER_00:Gotta be. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Everybody el nobody else says I do wrong.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, bitch. He definitely was crazy.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, exactly. He he did this thing. It's it's it's funny how that happens because they'll nobody's perfect.
SPEAKER_00:The niggas. You know, like this man, she was she sucked, she da da da da. I remember that time you checked me where I was like, I went off. Like I I went in a past relationship. Mm hmm. Yeah. And then you was like, bro, you really like didn't have to do that. And I I knew I didn't. Yeah, right. But like somebody else said it.
SPEAKER_01:Right, right. And you do you do that with me too. Yeah. I think we yeah, yeah, and I don't want to hear it. But it's true. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I may be stuck in my way for the moment, but I think about it like, yeah, that's kind of my yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh but yeah, so I think we have that with each other. It's like something it hurts. Uh my my boy Q has a lot of that too. Um, like it was something, it was it was something small I was tripping about. It was uh I burped and my girl has a strong nose. So he goes, ew. She has a strong nose. I burped. Yeah, yeah. That's totally funny. I tell her as like you like there's a uh on the side note, I was I was watching the YouTube channel. She got a strong nose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's too. Hold on, put a pen in that real quick. On a side note, that there is this lady who uh her husband had Alzheimer's, and uh she could like he went into this Alzheimer's group, and these Alzheimer's smelt like him. Like, yeah, yeah. So she could essentially uh so she was at this Alzheimer's conference, and then she was like uh said to one of the people who was doing the Q ⁇ A, like, why do people with Alzheimer's smell the same? Right? And then he's like, There's no study based off of that, but that's that study you lit. I don't even know if that's really good. That's not me lit. Okay, that's what you're saying. Okay, and so so Alzheimer's people smell the same thing. Okay, bear with me. It's not a lit thing, okay, okay, okay. And uh, like there's a fragrance of smell. Let me keep on I don't I don't know. I said I watched the YouTube channel, I didn't get to ask her any questions, but um so so that question that stuck with her, then he responded to her, and then he's like, all right, um he gave several people with Alzheimer's uh like she had he had her sniff who was in Alzheimer's, and so she smelt them, and out of the ten, she got nine of them right. Yeah. And then not only that, the one the ones she got wrong, huh?
SPEAKER_00:Are all ten of them with Yeah?
SPEAKER_01:So she had like a sniff test, like, okay, like let me put this to the nine of them right.
SPEAKER_00:I'm saying are all ten of them they have Alzheimer's. She was like, Alzheimer's. So let me get the Alzheimer.
SPEAKER_01:No, no, like she was like, it was a group of collective shirts, and she smelled the ones, and 10 of or nine of them, she she out of the ten, she guessed nine.
SPEAKER_00:Right, okay, okay. But then some of them weren't.
SPEAKER_01:Exactly. And then what happened was the one that she got wrong wasn't diagnosed with Alzheimer's yet, but he actually had it. Exactly. So I'm saying that to say as like, bruh, you got you can sniff cancer out of people, you know, because her nose is that strong. But it was she's the one, she needs to be like in the lab or something. Yeah, so yeah, so I was telling that to my my girl, I was telling my boy Q, it's like, you know, she has this was in the beginning of the relationship, and this was sensitive, but I'm being vulnerable. And then she was so I burped and she's like, ew, and that hurt my feelings. That hurt my feelings. I got cancer. Yeah, and then he was like, You're being sensitive, yeah. And I like that is true, yeah, yeah. And and then now that when she doesn't, I don't care, but I'm just saying sometimes we gotta say the thing that goes against like I want you to feel me, but like, nah, bro, you tripping. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so I have luckily I have you and Q and other friends that check me when I'm tripping. Oh, okay. And I I think that a lot of people can't handle that. And they're they just want yes men to surround them because it makes them feel good. But it's not true, truly not to their benefit. And they wonder why things are not going, the relationships they have with other people are not working, and since they have so many yes men in their corner, they don't truly realize it's them. Right.
SPEAKER_00:No, that that is, yeah. Actually, when I think about our conversations and our conversations with other people, our friends, I can tell, I I can understand how you say I'm not a yes man. Yeah, I definitely be like, y'all shouldn't be together. Like, y'all, yeah, yeah, da da da da da da. Yeah, yeah, y'all, da da da da. So um same thing with y'all. Yeah. Okay. Used to do it in the beginning of the podcast. Yeah, you be like, I used to hate that shit, bro. You you used to be like, um you used to preface it with negativity. So you'll say, you'll say, I already know what you're gonna say. But um, do you think you're a good boyfriend? Like, no, no, no. You'll say, you'll say, you'll say like certain things, bruh. Like, bruh, like it, it's it's a certain amount of of of no man that you carry. And which is probably the the the reason why we still friends.
SPEAKER_01:Right, right. And I I feel like what the point that you're getting it there is true to whatever you was like getting to. Oh yeah. Cause yeah, I I I do do that. Um, because I think at the end of the day, it's it's about care. And some people I don't feel the need to do that with. Right. Like you just do that. Yeah, yeah. I don't I don't love I'm not gonna say I was gonna say I don't love you enough, but I don't care to have go make this back and forth thing because you're gonna be you regardless. Regardless. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we, you know, this this relationship, you know, isn't strong enough for that to you probably look at me like I gotta be around you, nigga. Like yeah, yeah, and and and and maybe I may not have the words to penetrate that's light enough for you to carry it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, yeah, and I that'll be too like I don't know the words that besides it being direct, I don't know how to say it to where it can make you think about it a little bit more later on without it hurting, you know what I mean? Right, right. Yeah, and um, so my next question to you is uh do you feel like you need to go to therapy? Cause we I um from my knowledge, we both don't go to therapy.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, no, I don't, I don't, um which is weird, which is very weird for me to like say out loud. No. Um maybe it's because I have I have people around me that I can like speak to and talk to, and I'm I'm I'm at a place with myself that I'm very vulnerable, then I'm like, bro, I can't figure this certain shit out or whatever. I think it's necessary to go to therapy, but only for a certain amount of time. I think as humans, and you know, like I'm I'm on this like scientific type of shit, like when you talk about your traumas too much, you're in a habit of talking about your trauma. I don't believe that is beneficial. I think what's beneficial is talking about it, getting through it, and moving on. When you go to therapy and it's crazy for me to even say this because like I I I was once like a very therapy person, but like I feel like it's very like like like like like moment not monumental, but mo moment momental is that a word? I don't know what you're trying to say. Like a moment. Like it's very like deal with this, move on. Okay. Yeah, I got you. So get in therapy for this thing, move on. Because like when you do that, you're you're creating the habit in your head of like constantly thinking about this thing that traumatized you. I've done that with myself, it's not a good thing. So yeah, right.
SPEAKER_01:Um, and I feel you, and that's my grandmother has it, I feel like has a similar take on that as well. Yeah. Um the only thing that I that I slightly have a slightly different take about is that do you lean on your intuition?
SPEAKER_00:You know I do.
SPEAKER_01:Oh well, yeah, exactly. Right. It was it was a leading question. Um, so yeah, so by leaning on that, a lot of things can be like there's an intuition, then your then your trauma, like your PTSD kicking in. So you may have a similar experience that make you feel away, but you like this don't feel good, but it may be your PTSD and not your intuition. And when you truly don't address the situation, I feel like a lot of people don't know the difference. You see what I'm saying? I can see that. Yeah, yeah. So it's like if you never really fully try to dive into a traumatic experience and heal from it, then you like I, you know, you lash out and be like, dang, where'd that come from? It was like it was an intuition, you know, I felt this thing, and it it was because of you, and like, nah, that seems something traumatic in your past. Yeah, because I I'll be, you know, be talking to people, and you're like, you know, I fit I felt this. This don't feel right. And I'm like, you're cute, you're accusing me of of something. So like my intuition, I'm like, okay, I know exactly what I did, yeah, and I didn't do what you're accusing me of. Right. So either your intuition is full of ish, or this is PTSD. Yeah, because yeah, like how can you accuse me of cheating? I'm using an example. How can you accuse me of cheating when I know I didn't stick my dick in anybody? Right. Like that so I know what I did, so I know your intuition ain't right. So I maybe I did something similar to where the lot your past relationship did that. And and and now you're you're you're taking that traumatic experience and thinking it's this. But I know exactly what I did, so I know that's not either your intuition is completely trash or it's PTSD.
SPEAKER_00:Facts. No, I I definitely get what you're saying on that. Yeah um the intuition is yeah, when it when it comes to stuff like that, I can I can understand exactly what you're saying.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so so as so as like I'm in a place of like, okay, you can accuse me for whatever, but I know what the action that I did for real because I know I was there. Of course, it's my own actions, so I know I didn't do that. So you you're you're automatically telling me, you're automatically telling me this is a PTSD. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like I know what I didn't do, so you can lean on that and feel that way, but I I honestly I it tells me either your intuition trash or your PTSD. So I was like, yeah, so I so I know you need that healing. Yeah, yeah. So I was like I thought about that too.
SPEAKER_00:Like another, yeah, that's that's that's deep. But um yeah, I don't know. That's too deep for the podcast. Is it? I think so. Like, like I think, well, maybe if let's just let's just say they'll never see it. Okay. Let's just say they'll never see it. Nah, we've been drinking. Okay. Nah, yeah. Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_01:Well, if we can put a pin on that, maybe notate it, and maybe we can maybe another podcast we can get your dots together. That's a whole nother thing. Okay, you got an you got another question or topic for the podcast before I guess them.
SPEAKER_00:Um, another one. Let's see.
SPEAKER_01:Uh are you like any mini mini mo in it?
SPEAKER_00:Oh god.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, I mean, I got stuff, by the way. Well, go ahead, big dog. Okay, I got you. I do. Okay, so I've I was just talking to you about the roller coaster um today. I feel like you got something.
SPEAKER_00:Uh uh, the the second, I don't know. The second one is but but you haven't you haven't dealt with that. I have. Okay. Uh, I'm gonna just read the third one. Didn't even read it yet. Okay. Fuck it. Let's go. Uh do soulmates truth. We talked about soulmates. We did. I'm gonna go with four. Is unconditional love realistic in human relationships, or is it conditional by nature? I mean I think uh-huh. A little bit. No, go ahead and cook real quick. No, no, no, no.
SPEAKER_01:Because unconditional is I think that's um now I'm about to look it up. Unconditional love is showing love for another person without considering how it'll benefit you, or what you would get in return. Okay, okay. I can I think that's very rare. Okay, unconditional love from that's that's not how I interpreted when you first said it. Well, I think that is showing love for another person without considering how it would benefit you. Facts. Or how you would get in return. Facts. I yeah, unconditional love is is real. Like I love my grandmother, I love my mom, unconditional love. We're not talking about that. Okay, well, I'm just saying that means it exists though.
SPEAKER_00:Facts. Okay, yeah, I'm saying like uh uh relationships. Um you're in a relationship, so I don't want to like no blood out there. I I gave I gave let's take her out.
SPEAKER_01:Let's take her out and uh we let's keep her in. So, like for for me, it's this is just therapeutic if if if if somebody ever feels a way about it, is that's a conversation that we'll have. Because like I at this point, I'm like, just be vulnerable and speak your truth because somebody may be going through a similar situation than you, and that is, and I I'm not the person to try like put makeup on a pig, and I talk about my relationship enough to other people, make up on the pig, yeah, yeah, so to where it's like bruh, hey, it is what it is. If maybe me speaking openly, I'm not saying for this, but maybe sometimes speaking openly will make that change, and me speaking up will, yeah, like hey, sometimes you gotta uh it can it can help her her to help. But okay, showing love for another person without considering how to benefit you or you're getting returned, I can say in my relationship that I is it's somewhat conditional. So, and I'll speak for myself and I won't I'll take her out, um, take how she um what she does. But I feel like what I do is conditional because um if I'm doing something for you and you just don't really care about it, then or how how I interpret as you don't care. Um and you may, and I'm I'm saying it, I'm saying it wrong, um you may care about the thing that I do for you, or you may ask me to do this thing, but if it's not um, if you're not showing me the love that I that I should feel, then it makes me not want to do the thing anymore. So for I'm gonna use a completely separate example. If you tell me to take out the trash, and it's not my trash, we don't live together, um, and my tra the trash is 500 yards away. And I that's not my trash. I'm taking out your trash because you asked me to, and I start taking out your trash commonly, and you just don't care. It makes me not want to take out the trash anymore. Okay, yeah, it's like you don't appreciate the thing, the act. So why why would I continue to do it? And that's how I feel about certain things. Now that's very small in comparison to other things, but yeah, yeah, but it's like, okay, I know you want me to do this thing, and actually you need it needs to be done. Or say if the trash is so heavy that you can't take it out yourself, then you should appreciate me being here for to be able to do this thing, right? So, um, and now I'll um I'll say um I'll add on to it a little bit. Because I talked about this to my mom about love letters, and I maybe mentioned love letters to you. Or have I ever talked about love letters? No. Okay. How do you feel about love letters? Because this reminds me of maybe you did. Um I think we have. I think we have because I talked about um love letters.
SPEAKER_00:It just ain't in like get up to the par that I would love for it to be.
SPEAKER_01:Hey, you're so I can write this love letter telling you how much you mean to me and how much important you are in my life and how life-changing. If but it don't if I say that, if I say that to you, but ultimately like like dang, this sounds like I'm gold. But if you're not treating me like gold, then it's it's exactly what the love letter is exactly what it is. It's a love, it's it's it's words on a sheet of paper.
SPEAKER_00:Words on a sheet of paper.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so and that's kind of where I land with it. It's like, okay, oh, that feels great, that sounds good, but if I'm coming home and you're mad, you're upset, and it's like you can miss me if I'm here gone, then that love letter doesn't mean that much to me because you're not honoring the words that you're saying. You know what I mean? Because if if if I've truly feel about this, like like dang, I love my mom. But but if I ain't if I ain't saying like yeah, like you're cussing my mom out, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. I cussing my mom like you suck, you always been terrible, mother. I never appreciate what you done. You you didn't do much for me.
SPEAKER_00:Upload a video. I love my mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, then it's is that that letter doesn't mean much. Facts. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:No, that that has happened with me a few times. Uh and I definitely felt that. It was just like, I don't know. I'm a lover boy, like like as you know, but like I I love love, I love the whole thing. And like, so my my letters be hidden. My letters be like very on point to who you are as a person. And when I be getting letters back, some of them letters just be like, mmm, you ain't you ain't doing that. Like you ain't really like I I think I think you're inspired, like from what I've done. My letters. I think you're inspired from my letters versus like your letters actually meaning certain things. But um yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So I would say that so do you feel like it's like, hey, you're just saying that because I've written you one and you feel the obligation to write me one back, even though you don't really mean it for real.
SPEAKER_00:Sometimes, yeah. I gotcha. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They'll definitely be like, it'll definitely be that. It'll definitely be. I and now that I'm thinking about it, like some of them are that. It's like, nah, let me write him something because he definitely changed my day that day, like months or years ago or whatever. Yeah. So let me just say something.
SPEAKER_01:But like I'm reading him like because sometimes I want that, you know, like honey, I'm home and I'm greeted with love and a kiss, like you miss me. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But if I'm going, if I'm coming home and you rolling your eyes, like I still remember for to this day, I had a girl, um um um and I went to work and I came, I got off work and I came to the crib, and she just had a note there. It was like, I'm so proud of you, or something something like that. And the crib was cleaned up, you know what I'm saying? Like the the you know, like people, men when we have women and um they clean the house and d just do whatever, sometimes like we we may overlook certain things that they do. But like the clean was I mean, uh the crib was clean, the everything was like a different vibe as soon as I came back home. And it was very like spick and span. And um there was a note. There was a note right there, and it was like on the desk, and as soon as I sat down, and then she was cooking food, and then she was about to come in as soon as I was about to come uh uh or sit down, really, like from the crib, and in the note it was just like great job today, da da da and then it was salmon, broccoli, right? It was it was normal, it wasn't like anything crazy, and it was just like a plate there, and it was like bruh. I remember that too this day, because it was like being appreciated, bruh, like that that that shit is so monumental for uh uh men, you know, even simply like thank you for doing whatever, you know what I'm saying? Like that shit, it really puts you in a different mindset of what you're doing it for. You know, it's not like um you're doing everything for yourself, but like yeah, it's to to to to come to come home and be appreciated. That shit makes you want to to clock back in tomorrow.
SPEAKER_01:No, I I totally agree. Yeah. Um because and that is because I live by a positive affirmation. Uh-huh. Like that that's the feel. Yeah, it's like you did great today. Yeah, and and it it's it's a lot. And I feel that for feel that like, man, I truly appreciate you. Like, you know, you saved me during this time, you know, or whatever. It doesn't have to be that strong, but it could be something along those lines. Like, yeah, bruh, like that you came in so clutch. Like, I can only imagine when the when people do podcasting be like, bruh, I was about to kill myself, and then you actually came through. That makes you want to keep going. That's fuel, bruh.
SPEAKER_00:Like people say that about my videos, yeah, yeah, exactly. Italy, yeah. Like, hey, bro, I don't know if you understand, but like your videos are medicine. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, wow, like this is like you know, you know me. Like as a side job, like it's like a something that's funny as fuck, and then I just do it, you know. I mean, I'm clearly like dedicated, but but like to be dedicated to something and to I know it's bigger than me. Again, like I'm Steven in real life. That's race or silly, that's not me, you know what I'm saying? And um to get messages and be like, bro, like you you got me out of depression, bro. You you da da da from women. Hey, this was so funny. I was going through something and like you really brightened up my day. Well, throw me some cooch. Throw me some pussy.
SPEAKER_01:No, I'm just I'm just being funny.
SPEAKER_00:No, I'm being funny too. Yeah, yeah. Um, that's too much.
SPEAKER_01:But but no, but that's extra added uh fuel. Um that keeps you going. Yeah. Wow.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and you you appreciate me. Yeah, you appreciate the things I'm doing what like I I'm I'm I'm better showing up tomorrow now. Exactly exactly. Yeah, same with a man. Like the the the the when I had a relationship and I I had a woman and you know coming home and seeing her, like feeling safe, that's the best thing for a man. Come seeing your girl and you know she feels safe. Ooh, that's a different type of thing.
SPEAKER_01:That's actually elaborate on that more. What you mean feel safe?
SPEAKER_00:When she feels uh, when she feels safe, we got about 10 minutes. Yeah, on my on my okay, we can we can wrap it up here. Uh but um but when a woman feels safe, man, that's truly who she is. That that's that inner child. That's Kaya for me. Like that's like those who don't know, like I have a daughter named Kaya, and um when a girl feels safe and she can turn her brain off, that's that's literally who she is, like as a person. And like if she can just be that, that's the best thing for a man. You know, like and to be honest, you have to be that nigga though. You have to, you have to, you know, provide the experience of like you said, like, you know, when you go out, da-da-da, boom, you pay the bill, whatever. But to your girl, bruh, like that is the best thing that they can experience, right? Just like just being safe and just being like taken care of and all that, that is the hype, I feel like. That is the best version of that woman that you're gonna see.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Like when she's safe, oh, you're gonna get exact you're gonna get exactly what you seek from her from the first time you've seen her. And and that's when the bills pass due. Okay, okay, I got you. I got you.
SPEAKER_01:So not it not necessarily safe from it's also not just including safe and protection. Like, I feel safe or protected. It's more it's more of like financially safe. No, both of them. Oh, yeah, okay, I got you. I got you.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, like when they feel safe and protected, you know, yeah, they are literally that soft girl. Just like, uh daddy, I love you. Like that girl, you know what I'm saying? But uh, you know, the bills passed, dude, it's like nigga. Yeah, then it turned to that. Uh, but but you know, women are they best when men are their best.
SPEAKER_01:Understood. I think that was a good closing. That was a great closing. Yeah. All right. Well, this is two for the culture. We'll be back. We'll be back. Yes, sir.