Two for the Culture
Two for the Culture is brought to you be Steven Rey and Justin Devonte. This is the podcast for the ages! Both Steve and Justin has been friends for over a decade plus and will give you a genuine approach on news and culture with humor and love. I promise this will be one of your favorite podcasts that you will not get enough of!
Two for the Culture
Cougars, Waffle House, And Clarity
We go out for a “chill” night and come back with clarity about exes, momentum, social confidence, and the grind that keeps creative work alive. We talk cues at the bar, what recognition really means, and why losing motion costs more than any tab.
• recap of the night across Melrose, Bar Sovereign, Broadway
• running into an ex and realizing the chapter is closed
• reading solo drinkers, groups, and intent in loud rooms
• rejection as a rep and building social confidence
• reputation management at regular spots
• being recognized, networking, and real-world momentum
• the hidden labor behind podcasting and content
• balancing full-time work, creative goals, and energy
• virality vs consistency and how to keep motion
• age gaps, boundaries, and parental discomfort
• choosing happiness and taking craft seriously
And we are back with another episode of Two for the Culture. I'm Justin Devante. Stephen Ray. And we are back. Yeah. How you feeling? I'm doing good, man. We had a good time yesterday. We had a great time yesterday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I really enjoyed it. I'm glad we got out because uh it's always I always want to get out during the my three-day weekends that I have, like I have today off Monday. And so I try to fill want to fill that in with something, but typically it doesn't always go. But I want to make that a thing if we can't. Yeah, because that was a really good time. Yeah, I'm I'm good. I'm I'm good. I I don't even think well, I know I didn't spend too much money, I don't think. Um it was enough. Okay. Yeah. Well, I mean yours was different because you had like your Uber Eats order. Uh yeah, yeah. What do you mean? Like that, um, the Waffle House order. Waffle House, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's like$50 for Waffle House. It's like absurd. Yeah. Yeah. Did you even eat some of Yeah, I finished it. Okay, good. Cause I was like, yeah, it looked like a lot of food was left.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Um I'm going on a fast, but like I I'm gonna do it tomorrow. Oh, okay. The fast. Yeah, because I I went to sleep, I don't know, eight, nine this morning. I don't know how I even did that. You want to do a quick recap of yesterday?
SPEAKER_00:Uh uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So uh what's the first thing that we did? Um, so we linked up, you know. I was trying to be like uh somewhat healthy and bring like organic wine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think that really mattered at the end of the night. That's not how it got because I thought it was gonna be like, hey, chill, you know, we'll go to Melrose and maybe stop at another bar, but that's kind of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's yeah. So I thought it was gonna be very chill. Like, man, I'm gonna spend like 30 bucks, you know, like 50 at the most. And I think I still did maybe around there. I don't know. But yeah, so got there, yeah, finished the bottle because it was like$13 for like organic wine. Um, so we finished that, and then so it had a good bus going. Yeah, so then we moved the bus. Yeah, so we start start at Melrose uh Billards, which is like the cheapest bar you're gonna find around. Yeah, yeah. And you know, it's it's a cool little vibe, not too much. It's like a healthy, busy, yeah, um, yeah, where they got darts, they got pool, um, things along those lines, like TVs, you can watch the game. So, yeah, so we had just a kilo water, like double. Yeah, uh, so we had that and finished, then we went to bar start. Because what was your plans? My plans for the night, yeah, yeah. Like, what did you have in mind? Because you text me, like, hey, we you know, we still hanging or something like that.
SPEAKER_03:Or yeah, I was like 50-50 going out, yeah. But at the same time, I knew I I haven't been outside. Uh like I told you, sometimes like I'm just locked in here. Um so sometimes I just need like different energy and stuff. So that night I thought that if you went, I was just like, all right, I'm gonna just I'm gonna just go. Just because I felt like I needed it. Um so I felt like we were just gonna go there and maybe end up at Duco's again.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Cause you know, Duco's really shuts down early on Sunday. So I that was never in my plan. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah. Well, um, yeah, I just figured it was probably just gonna be like one one place, maybe two. But just how it usually is, as soon as I'm outside, then it's just like it's whatever. So yeah, we uh yeah, we went there, then we went to um where we go after that, to the the the uh the place that that I was like this same place.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, Bar Sovereign. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, so parked there, you know, it was like$12 for two hours, which is I think that's a reasonable price for parking. Yeah. So I wasn't mad at that, but yeah, so we went into Bar Sovereign, and then the first, you know, we first get out, and then it goes back into our latest episode to where you say, where are you capping?
SPEAKER_03:Oh yeah, that that was too funny. Yeah, actually, yeah, you can Oh yeah, right.
SPEAKER_00:So, so just to recap from a previous episode, we had a port uh I talked to you about, hey, if you meet your ex in the grocery store, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, how would that conversation go? How would you feel? Would your heart stop? Yada yada. And um, I was like, hey, would you you know go and take him to dinner? And then so I said that uh I didn't really we didn't really talk about if my heart would stop or how would I feel, but you know, I was like, Yeah, I would treat him to dinner, you know, yeah. So we stumble upon, we get out of the car, then we see my ex-girlfriend of mine, right? Um, which is you know, my eyes, I was like, that looks like her, but my eyes aren't as good as it used to be. Uh-huh. So yeah, so I was like, Yeah, I think that's her, you know. And then um, so we walk up and we chat for a little bit, and then you and then we kind of went our separate ways, which is cool to see her. I'm glad, you know. She still seems very much her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like in my eyes, I would have thought there was, you know, like a mature version of her. You know what I mean? Like that not now that she has a child, you know that it yeah, yeah, yeah. So she has a child um who's probably maybe a little bit older than yours. Maybe I'm a s I'm trying to do the math in my head. I think it's relatively around. Um y'all have similar ages and children. So um, you know, I thought it was gonna be like a grown-up version of her, but it felt I don't know what was your vibe, but it felt like it was very much the same person.
SPEAKER_03:Um I I I was I mean, we you we didn't really have much to go on, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I I think the place of where it was and all that, we probably didn't look any different either. Probably so, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was a hoodie on and yeah, true.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I think that's m somewhat unfair, but you know, it was like I guess the weed smoke and all that stuff. Yeah, yeah. It's like okay. Yeah, yeah. She was definitely rolled. Yeah. Yeah, so I guess that's that's a very unfair, and I'm sure there's a lot of things she's going on. I have no idea. But uh, yeah, so yeah, I want to kind of scratch that from the record, because that is true. That is kind of unfair to say, like, hey, she looks like the same person at 21, and that's very much not fair to her. Yeah, um, but yeah, so you're right.
SPEAKER_03:But um, but yeah, so yeah, so I was like, no, no, no, no, do what you say. Yeah, but yeah, I think that was plan, but yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But you said that, like, hey, you didn't treat her to dinner, and I'm like, there was no opportunity, the conversation never led that. So if there was like, hey, like a long conversation, then maybe could have got there. Uh-huh. But um, but yeah, I would have held to that if that's how it went. But it was very much, hey, how you doing? Nice seeing you. How's the family? Yeah, and that was very much it.
SPEAKER_03:I feel like how that went was exactly how I saw any situation like that happening. Yeah, it's just boom, you see them out of nowhere. What the fuck? Do you go through that first five minutes and then yeah, you catch up real quick, and then you just move on.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I I I agree. It just depends on the ex, right? Yeah. So I don't anticipate me feeling that way because that that felt like a friend. Yeah. More so than it felt like somebody who I did love and love very hard. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, yeah. That, you know, there was a lot of trauma built in that and how I handled relationships going forward, how mature, you know, how much that was a lesson for me. Like, none of that was like built into our interaction. Like, yeah, yeah. It was just very like it was like, hey, you know, it's great seeing you, you know, yeah. And it was that. So I didn't have none of what I used to kind of hold against her a little bit there anymore. Yeah, but yeah, but my more recent one, I don't think that that would that feeling would have been there.
SPEAKER_03:I very much like a friend thing, no, not at all.
SPEAKER_00:Because yeah, soon exactly, very much so. I totally agree. So yeah, so I when I pictured all like thinking about her, like I still maybe picture like if I was to see her, maybe my something may trigger in my mind. Uh huh. But it that didn't happen. Yeah, yeah. So it was so it was very interesting to see. Um, but I know if I was to see my recent one, my recent ex-girlfriend, it would probably be like, yeah, yeah, like maybe my heart would stop a little bit. Maybe I would, you know what I mean? Like I'll act like I didn't, or maybe I would, I don't know. You know what I mean? There's a lot of things because you know, in I think it would be probably like a game. Like if she says hey, I'll say hey, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, yeah. So that was that kind of start off, and you know, when her her little sister, who we was all close with each other to a certain degree, so I would have loved to have seen her. Like, hey, how things going? Not you know what I mean. You're grown now, you know. So I was kind of excited for that, but I didn't get to see how she was doing. Um but I did ask, like, hey, how's so and so? I don't know if you remember that. Yeah, no, um, but it would have been it would have been great to see the family. I would have loved that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just see everybody because you haven't seen them in such a like I said, it felt like a long last long last friend. Yeah, exactly. That you haven't seen in a while, which was I like that.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Um, yeah, but yeah, so um that was how it started. So it was it was a good start tonight, I felt.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Um yeah, we um yeah, we just sat here talking for a second, boom, then we went to um inside Bar Sovereign. Which yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is very hard, then we went in there.
SPEAKER_00:Which is I'm sure it's probably popular on Friday and Saturday, but I've known it to be packed more than what a bar around that area should on a Sunday.
SPEAKER_03:Oh yeah, I did not know that. Yeah, yeah. So it's crazy. Right, right. Yeah, it took me back to like club days or something. It's just so packed. I knew as soon as we walked in, I'm like, I don't know how this is gonna work. I think I said that. But yeah. Then uh then we walked to up the the the street to to Broadway to some random place.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so we went to AJ's a good time bar, which was like um one of those whole for it to be Broadway, like the hole in spot, a hole in the wall of Broadway, essentially. Because you're like, bro, where's the cheap drinks here? I was like, this is the best you're gonna get, you know. Yeah, yeah. To where I think they still have like baloney sandwiches and stuff like that and chips.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, I definitely looked out, yeah. I didn't see uh too much of a me. Yeah, but uh that was cool. That was cool, and then we came back and then actually spaced it.
SPEAKER_00:Let's slow down a little bit. We got got into got into the bar, uh, just took got a drink real quick. But you know, I mean, uh there's two things. One is a cougar, like cougars. I don't know if you was paying attention like I was, uh, but you know, when do you look okay? So when you when you check the scene and you look like there's one thing even at the Melrose spot, there's like a single girl at the bar. She was next to me though. So I didn't even know. Yeah, right, right. So for that, does that trigger anything to you? What do you mean?
SPEAKER_01:Like, I hate cougars.
SPEAKER_00:What do you mean? No, no. Um so I'm talking about, so let's bring it back to Melrose real quick. Right, right, right. So she wasn't a cougar, she looked maybe around our age, I would assume. But she was she went to the bar by herself and was she was chilling by herself. If you were attracted to her, would that signal anything in your mind? Like, hey, it's a Sunday night, she's by herself, she's drinking by herself.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, I mean, if there's any woman, um I'm fucking anything. Well, uh if there, yeah, but if it's uh a nice woman or whatever, I am slightly judging, like off-rip. Okay, yeah. I I don't know why or where that comes from, but I just don't see the woman that I want to be with at a bar like that by herself, you know, just like getting a drink. I just I I don't I don't think my woman is there. Okay, yeah, but you're not you're not looking for a relationship either. Right. Yeah, I'm saying like if I was like long term, that's why I said judging a little bit, because I'm like, mm-hmm, like I don't know if I quite like that. But um or at least like the the type of place, you know what I'm saying? Like the the the bar sovereign. I could see or or Ducos or something, I could see a girl like going there like for the vibe, whatever, maybe get a bite to eat and dip. But we're talking about them bar bars, like you just hear grown white men, yeah, like those type of bars. Yeah, and you just chilling by yourself ordering it. If you order a beer, oh my god. Okay, you know, that's that's that's crazy. I'm still gonna talk to you though.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. So does does never never fall in that category, or is that like between Duco's and uh Merro's?
SPEAKER_03:Um yeah, never never is is it's still sort of that spot. Usually girls go out together, yeah, yeah. You know, so it yeah, it's just one of my things. If I see a woman at a bar, it depends. It depends on the bar too, because I went to Jeff Ruby's and there was a um Jeff Ruby's, those who don't know, it's like a very upscale type of place. Everybody dresses up when they go there. Um it's a steakhouse. Steakhouse. Yeah. They play Frank Sinatra. Yeah, that I think Steakhouse tells you kind of everything you need to know about the bar you're in. Right, right, right. So I, you know, I seen I saw a woman there before, um, just by herself, and it was a different vibe. So I guess it depends on the bar. But um Yeah, if there's a girl sitting there, yeah, no, I would definitely say something for sure.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I I guess I'm trying to if you're putting yourself in her shoes as best you can, you're analyzing the situation. What do you think she's searching for? Um because uh and I'll paint the scene a little bit more. She was not talking to the bartender like she knew him. So so it wasn't there, hey, my friend works here.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:You're by yourself.
SPEAKER_03:It sounds sad.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. It sounds like in my head, you're either it's either two things. It's either like you do this often, or may or maybe every now and then, whatever. Or you're having a sad day today, and you're here and you know, this is the the the most thing that you can think of to do to probably feel better. Like this did the girl next to me, did she look kind of sad a little bit?
SPEAKER_00:No, I think so I so that's how you analyze it. I think it was like I'm looking for a male interaction.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, okay. Well, that's how I'm sorry out there, too.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:So that's how I perceived it as I yeah, okay, I I can see that too. Um, which I've dealt with before. Like I said, uh uh uh the place uh um the they used to have a bar here, and yeah. But you're talking about like the prostitute, yeah. Okay next to me and I'm like Oh, you know, you're you're clearly uh prompting me to pay for something that you want, or you you're you're you're fishing for me.
SPEAKER_00:Right, yeah. So that one, you know, I don't think she was a prostitute though. Yeah, the girl next to me. Yeah, but yeah, because yeah, yeah, male interaction, you're a prostitution. I'm not putting that in the same category. You're you're selling yourself in the the both ways, you know, like figuratively and literally, you're selling yourself to somebody so I don't put that in the male interaction. She probably, if a girl was willing to pay, she will pay. You know what I mean? Uh-huh. She would probably go for it, I'm sure, because she left with a guy and a girl.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, facts.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. So if a girl is putting, but she knows men got it, and that's probably the odds of her chances are higher. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:So um, yeah, because I'm not gonna do that. I want to do that one day. What's that? Just just just just just for the story. What? Just for the books, go to uh a bar and then um say how much or more?
SPEAKER_00:Uh yeah, yeah like yeah, yeah. Hey, 200 for me. Yeah, yeah. That's that's funny that you said that because I I've never did that. Right. But does that? Well, what I was gonna I mean, somebody, I'm sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you know, no, yeah, not that I've seen like a male kind of hold themselves out, like unless it was like a maybe a homosexual. You see that I probably see run into that more than oh okay, maybe yeah, yeah. So what the story I was gonna say was when I was Ubering one time, and you know, there was this um it was this drunk group. I picked them up from what's that game place that we up up down. Uh-huh. Yeah, so I picked them up from there, and then you know, she was like, You're hot, yada yada. And then um, but she was lit. Yeah. So as I'm as I'm driving, we finally get to her um her spot. She her and her friends, I guess, stay in uh one of the high rises downtown, and she's like, I'm a nurse, I make a hundred dollars an hour. Oh yeah, yeah exactly. Yeah, that's because I was like, hey, you know, I need to work, it's kind of how I spin it. Um, because one, there's a couple things why I do that. And she was cute. Um, but there's several reasons why I do it. One, definitely when I was doing Uber full time at the time, I didn't I don't want to lose my job over some coochie. Like, if you're drunk, then I don't wanna um yeah, that they regret it the next day, then you know what I mean? Then I get a charge on me that I didn't expect. So if I'm sober, you're lit, then I'm gonna push it off. I'll be like, yeah, you know, I gotta drive. I'll I'll be it'll be like a nice rejection. Yeah. Um, but then um she pulls out her debit card, yeah, and then she's like, Well, how much does it cost to get you um, you know, to stop driving, essentially. Yeah, and she put her card on my front seat, and then I'm like, Yeah, uh what I said is you can keep that because that's I didn't this is how I thought in my mind, I don't know what I said. I know I gave it back to her. Uh huh. And I was well, I was like, that's prostitution. I'd rather hang with you for free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not how I move. Yeah, um, but that was I guess my closest interaction of you know, paying for my time. Yeah, but you know, it was splattering, but at the same time, I also know that you're lit. Oh, fact, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, and and then as always, I'll just like exchange numbers, you know, and then like if this is something you want to hang out maybe later on or something like that, then that'll make me feel better. Um, so I've had some that was probably the one to where it was like, hey, I'm giving you cash. I'll I I'll hear that sometimes, but it would never be that obvious that you want to have sex, yeah. Like, you know, like hey, you know, hey, we can pay for you to stop driving, we just want to hang. Yeah, I've had like similar to that, but it was never like hey, I think these people want to have sex with me. She she was clearly obvious, uh-huh. And then you get other things like that. Like, I remember this bandy student. She she was like, Hey, you know, you know, we come inside my dorm. I was like, Justin's not coming to anybody's dorm room, you know what I mean? This is like two years ago, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like, no, because I was like, I'm way I'm in my 30s. You know, I'm not going to somebody's dorm room. Yeah, that's like that just sounds hella whack to me. Cause you got security, you gotta check in. She was cute. Like, it's some some of the girls be fine for real. Yeah, it's not like it's like you know, it's hard to look at.
SPEAKER_03:You do gotta check in.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, like yeah, yeah. I'm just I'm just remembering my time at being in a dorm. I'm like, you gotta check a grown man in, like, bruh. I'm yeah. Yeah, yeah. But like, yeah, the girls that are typically not ugly. You know what I mean? Some are like, yeah, I'm good, but most of the time they're straight. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Man, there were some baddies at the place last night. They were? It was dark. So maybe a little credit to it may it may not have um well, not to say anything negative, but no, they they was they was out. They was definitely out. I was like, oh my god.
SPEAKER_00:And and maybe and I speak to myself, like how do like when there's a a baddish group, how do you you properly, you know, mingle yourself in that? In there?
SPEAKER_03:Um have I done that? I'm pretty sure I have. Um, I don't know, that shit trial and error. It could be it could be something as simple as you pick the one you like and just go for it. Or two, it could be just something that's random as you bump into them on accident.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, but I'm just saying, like, if it's two, it's easier. But if it's three to five, like, that's when it kind of makes it really tough, and I I'm kind of out. Like, I don't know how to fall in because if they're all fine and like, hey, you picked the one that has a boyfriend, you can't go to like exactly.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, that's why I say it's a decision. Yeah, it's a decision you have to make. Yeah, so what y'all got going on?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so my my game is well, um, I'll just go here, go here again. Just hey, let me actually put time in so they can see a recurring face, so they can build familiarity. There we go. Um, to where now it makes it easier, like, hey, we see you here all the time. What's your name? Yada yada. And that's kind of how I move when it comes to situations like that. So it's never like this first piercing interaction, and definitely with bartenders. Like, that's like, okay, there's one I like or I go for, then they work here, so I'm no I'm gonna probably see them again, so I'll just kind of keep going. Yeah, yeah. I I can see that.
SPEAKER_03:I I think I don't know, with all that stuff, I I gotten to the point where just like I told you and showed you probably a few times, just you just know the uh a no might happen. So like just being rejected or whatever, it's like that shit scary, but it's a part of it. It's just like, all right, whatever. You know, I I've done that before. There was like a group of girls one time, and I I wanted to talk to one, but it was just like seven of them. It was a coffee shop. And uh in the middle of the day. Yeah, it was in the middle of the day. And I just talked to all of them. You just talk to all of them and you just see how the conversation goes. Because like nine times out of ten, usually anyway, usually it the conversation ain't never as bad as you what you think it is. You know what I'm saying? You might see like seven girls and you're like, uh, I don't know. But then you literally just open it up and talk, and you probably the only dude that uh well, probably not, if they bad. But um, you're probably one of the few that will actually have a conversation with them. You know what I'm saying? And they probably do want to Well I don't know. I can't talk for all women because women show be going to the club and the lounge just be like, ew, man, I don't I'm with my girls tonight. Um it just is what it is. Yeah, it just is what it is. I I just feel like as soon as you just know I might get rejected, fuck it. As soon as I got there, I got better at everything. Like just speaking and uh those scary moments where you just see like all these people. Like, am I gonna actually talk to them?
SPEAKER_00:So what was so I feel like you came in there with as long as I have a good conversation, it was a win. Right? Because you did you get any numbers from that? Did you see?
SPEAKER_03:No, no, no, no, no. Yeah, no, I didn't. Uh I I talked to her for a second, but then her girls like pulled her away, type shit.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, exactly. So I'm saying, like, that's where it's like, hey, I want not just to do it, just to do it. It's more of like, okay, strategically, how am I gonna make this work? What you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_03:I'm I'm I'm more in the middle. I'm more I'm more in the middle because I always feel like no matter what happens, this is gonna make me better the next time. And usually, usually when I do think like that, there is always another moment. And the girl probably even badder, like on the the the the next uh times that I have like interactions like that. So I will like try to have a plan sometimes, you know. If you see somebody, you actually want to speak to them and if it doesn't go right, whatever, at least like I just built up the confidence to you know to want to do it, and then I usually usually after I I I do something like speak to somebody random or whatever, the next time I'm just more aware of how to maneuver through the situation. And I can't ever know how to do that until I just go up there and talk to whoever it is.
SPEAKER_00:Right, yeah. I I agree, like there's natural, like like my nephew, I feel like has natural charisma, but I mean, but you got terms of like who knows how to dribble in between their legs the first time they dribble a ball, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, so of course there's a a certain amount of like re practice, you know. Um, so I I definitely agree there. Um, and then with in terms of like recurring bars, like me keeping going consistently to the same bar, um, then also I want to pick my spot as well because I don't want to be like, hey, you try with them and then you try it over with this group, and then he's like, hey, that's this is his reputation. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you know, I it's also I want to pick my spot. So I want to make sure that I'm not I'm talking to everybody, you know what I mean? Like being cool with everybody, ain't just you, I'm uh you know, I'm I'm looking for. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:You definitely go to the same spots. I thought about that one day. Um I thought about that or uh the place I stay. Like the the bar downstairs. I was like, you know, if I keep going to this, and you know, if there's somebody new every now and then and I have a conversation with them, like what does this look like? A part of that feels weird. It's just like, oh, this is my spot that I that you know I'm saying. Now I know the bartenders, now they know me. And we're like, okay, here you go again. You know, like I don't even want that. I feel like there's too many eyes on you. Uh so I do get what you're saying about like the the the spot thing. I never dealt with that, but there's this movie called Um Damn, I don't I forgot what the movie's called, but uh Ryan Gosling.
SPEAKER_00:Uh like Eat Pray Love or something like that?
SPEAKER_03:Some crazy, stupid love. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and the man went to the same bar every day or weekend or whatever, the same one and just got a new girl every single time and brought her home every single time. And I'm just like, how first of all, you get you you just gotta be him to do that. Um but you have a reputation of just just picking up girls from this one spot. So I wonder how does that help? Does that does that hurt the game a little bit? You know what I'm saying? I I wonder, I wonder. Because I do think about it in terms of I think I told you I used to like a whole bunch of girls posting shit and just say whatever, like on because I thought it was funny, like I'm Ray So Silly. It was like your dinner's ready, you know, just saying it. And then I thought about it one day. I'm like, ah, it's kind of like the bar thing that we're talking about. It's like, no, this nigga be doing this all the time. Like, I don't, I I I feel like my wife is somewhere looking at that and just you know, like I don't think I like this nigga anymore.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and and then not only that is like who you follow. Well, it maybe has has to do with like who you follow and you have to mutually follow each other, but they can see the your likes, yeah, essentially. Yeah, yeah, like your comments, because there's a like a you're a real that you can control, but then there's uh your who your friends liked as well, and you can see that. So if they're seeing that a number of times, you're like, bruh. No, I got called out the before, yeah, which is why I had to stop doing that. Okay, I got you. But but she didn't mind.
SPEAKER_03:No, it was just like uh like first of all, I never went with anybody, so I I'm not um this is this is not like a girlfriend or whatever, but they'll throw a joke out there. It was like, I see you and everybody likes, and then I'm like, uh, okay, yeah. Like it's probably not a good look.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, if she and if she's seeing it, the other people are seeing it as well.
SPEAKER_03:Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:I thought about that too. Um on the night getting recognized or whatever. Like that was I was thinking about that. I think in the past week, in the past couple of days, it's been seven noticeable times. So whatever's happening is happening right now, like with my stuff. But I thought about I'm like, damn, that's that's only the seven who actually said something to me. So like I wonder like how big is it really?
SPEAKER_00:No, I think it's um, I think it's big. I I think regardless of your content, what you're doing right now, I think that they would have probably still recognized you. That's just my outside looking at. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:How? What you mean? Just because I've been in it so long? Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Uh yeah, yeah, you've been in it so long. You had a public relationship, you've been in Royal Star, you've been on um what is that? The big one now? Shade room. Yeah, yeah. The shade room. I feel like, oh, not knowing that all right off the bat. But yeah, the shade room and stuff like that to where it's and then you're on top of the all the stuff that's went viral where you got millions of views and you're across platforms. Yeah, yeah. So I think that's just just you being in the game. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, yeah. Like, you know, uh Brian Scalabrini. Have you heard that name before? Um, he's in bat basketball. He's just he's known as the white mamba, but pretty much he's just he's just like, you know, like the 12th man who's been in the league for a long time, so he's just recognizable. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm not saying I'm not calling you Scalabrini, but I'm just saying there's there's something to like longevity in it. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
SPEAKER_03:For sure. And that does make me feel better about connecting with um connecting with brands and people. Um uh uh uh uh not not necessarily brands, but um just networking, building my confidence up of networking in like establishments. Yeah, so that was cool.
SPEAKER_00:Did you recognize recogniz now uh going back to I got a couple things that we want to talk about from last night, but uh going back to Bar Sovereign, the Vandy, the Vandy guy, do you recognize him? Did you recognize him? You remember the Vandy dude that was like um you're doing better than Yada Yada, the other influencer at the time. You don't rem oh you just was lit then. You don't remember the Vandy dude that came as like, hey, you know, it was me and Lloyd. Um I don't know his name, but I was just saying, do you do you did you recognize him at all? Or do you not even remember the moment?
SPEAKER_03:No, it's coming to me.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:There was a couple different Yeah Yeah, yeah. We were outside, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I forgot for some reason his face ain't showing. Oh, but um, yeah, he did look familiar.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, okay. Yeah, he did look familiar. What what about it? Well, I mean, I would just I was gonna bring up if you don't remember the moment, so me bringing it up now, I would have to say the guy's name, and I know that wouldn't go. Like the cause he mentioned another influencer who's not big who was big during the bandy times that wasn't that's not big now.
SPEAKER_03:Oh my god, yeah. The name popped up in my head.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I was like, I was like, if I have to do all that, then I have to say the name because I didn't think you remember it at all. But now you remember the moment. But him him saying that, yeah. I was just asking, did you remember the guy? Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03:Okay. Um I remember him. He uh he hit me up when uh I was staying with Ken. He was just like, yo, bro, like you kept going. People don't really know you actually OG in this whole thing. And yeah, he was popping. He was he was he was popping.
SPEAKER_00:He was one of the first black um and I was talking about the Vandy's dude, uh the dude from Vandy last night. I was saying, because I never saw his face before. Uh-huh. Um, but he he had a he was like in the know for him to mention that guy, the influencer's name. Oh, right. Yeah, I was like, okay, I was like, did you even know him? Did you know his name?
SPEAKER_03:Oh, yeah. No, I don't I don't know his name.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_03:Um, we had to have hung out a few times. Uh yeah, he does look familiar. I do remember him from Vandy. Oh, okay, I got you. I used to go there like every other weekend sometimes. Uh right, right, right. I understood. Yeah. So no, I I I do remember him. But that was that's that is crazy.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, because you have been in the game for a very long time, even before Instagram. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:This wow. Yeah. That that is why I'm really, really proud of what the where I've taken it thus far and just just just sticking to it. And now I feel like I'm better than I was before. It's it's weird. It's like the my follow, my follower count, like a couple hundred on this platform, a couple hundred on this platform, um it doesn't really change much unless I hit a uh a video that hits like 10 million. Then I'll get like a hundred thousand followers or something. But the videos are all going though. And I can tell it's it's different now than being recognized before, or like when I just got um Ray So Silly popping. It feels now it feels like being recognized instead of not knowing who I am, or even if they don't know who I am, excuse me. Back then it was just like, oh, that's the dude. Um yeah, like that's the dude who da-da-da-da. Now it seems like I'm a family member. It seems like they are like very happy to see me. Right. Yeah, it's completely different. Um it's way different. Uh did you remember last night it was a woman next to you? Yeah, she like grabbed my hand and it was.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I didn't know what she did. I was but I heard her say, yeah, I see you be on the videos or something like that. Yeah, yeah. Was she bigger?
SPEAKER_03:Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it was just the the the the biggest smile from these people now. It's different. It's way different. It feels like I'm at home or something. Like when I when I go out or whatever, it it feels I don't know, it's it's it's just a different feeling now. So yeah, I'm just super appreciative of like everything that's going on. But the the being recognized is 100% going up right now.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. I think that you're in more black places, so I think that's just really kind of has where I was taking before was us like whites, majority white spots. So you ain't you know what I mean. That's not the demographic of where you kind of play in. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, in a way. Yeah, I mean, well, because I I think there's a noticeable difference.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, no, yeah, of being recognized for sure. Right, right. It's still it's still this is reminding me of when I first got popping uh on Race So City. Like, I feel like at this point, me stepping into a a black place is somebody. Yeah, somebody in her knows me.
SPEAKER_00:I and I think I think so too. Like, that's why I was saying before is like in in terms of like influencing, like, and I think this is important. We probably need to do more of that. Um, but it's like you should be in the know about all the influencing spots, you know, like the grand openings to where they're bringing influences out, they're paying for this and that. I was like, that that should be more of your in and know now that you're here in Nashville. Like, um, like the when Snoop Dogg Dre's opening, you know, I don't know if that's a grand opening, it's like, hey, somebody should have, you know, reached out to you. Yeah. So um, because there's a lot of little things, and there's, you know, kind of money to be made out there in that way, at least in the streets of Nashville, let alone your whole, you know, facts, social media. No, facts. Yeah, that's what I meant too.
SPEAKER_03:Like yesterday, just running across people, you know, the the first dude, he was like, yo, hey, bro, like I'm a director. Uh da da da da da da da. And then we like we exchanged numbers and stuff. Yeah, I I I definitely want to be more in the know because I see like I said, my confidence is kind of going up with that, or going to these places and like seeing like it's damn near nine times out of ten, somebody in here knows who I am. Right, yeah, for sure. I'd agree. That's that's that's it's it's very enlightening.
SPEAKER_00:It's crazy. No, that's dope. So, but back to the cougar stuff. Yeah, yeah. So we so we went to AJ's bar. There's like some older older women. I don't know if you saw her kind of like brush up on my my shirt, my jacket. I think I I didn't think you did, but yeah, and I don't think that's your game, so like like you're not interested in that at all. I don't what, in Cougars? Yeah, yeah. If they look nice, okay, okay. I'll just yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, I was like, yeah, I I guess for you as like I'm not gonna entertain them because that's not what you are, you know what I mean? That's not I don't care. Oh, okay, okay. Well, now I know going forward, but yeah, so um, but we was leaving out, and you know, we was kind of on our own mission because with the two-hour parking that I had to pay for, I didn't want to just get out of Bar Sovereign when he's like, hey, the vibe ain't here yet, you know. And I was like, I'm not gonna, you know, yeah, just leave money on the table, just get in and get out. Um, so I was like, let's go downtown. So we walked from downtown, and then um we went back to Bar Sovereign, and that was a better time now that we have yeah, yeah. It's and I think yeah, because one the bartender was super cool, gave us some shots, we drank there, and then we was lit. So that I don't even know how long we stayed, but it couldn't have been pay for those? The two shots? Yeah, no.
SPEAKER_03:I was wondering where they where they came from.
SPEAKER_00:I was like, oh, I guess Just is just trying to get lit for real. No, like he thought I was a bartender too. I don't know why he did it, but yeah, like you do that more often, whatever you do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just cool, chilling, you know. You tip the guy, I tip him, yeah, yeah. So maybe that was it, but yeah. So he just gave us some shots, and you know, we kind of yeah, so it can be I definitely thought that you you ordered the shots. No, no, yeah. I was like, oh okay. Yeah, I was like, yeah, we're definitely getting lit for real. Yeah, yeah. So that night turned out to be way better than I thought it was gonna be. Oh god, yeah, yeah. Cause I just knew I was gonna be like, maybe I'll probably Uber, you know, we'll get out for a little bit for an hour or two, and then I'll Uber for the rest of the night since I don't gotta work. Yeah, uh, but that's not how that went. Yeah, yeah. I came, I came back to your spot. I immediately passed out, I'm sure.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was after it was after a little bit. Yeah, I don't know, I don't know what energy I had. Yeah, I stayed up. I don't know how that happened.
SPEAKER_00:And I'm more impressed about that. Probably, yeah, yeah. Like how even because when I get drunk, I go to sleep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so for you to be up and like when I'm waking. Up and I'm fully rested and you're still up moving around. I'm like, how do you do that? Like, like, I'm just impressed. That's a hard trait to do. Yeah, like you ain't even ready to go to bed. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:I don't know what happened, bro.
SPEAKER_00:I don't even know what you did do in between that time.
SPEAKER_03:Bruh, I was what was I doing? I was eating some of the time. Um, I was listening to music, and I just didn't know why. I didn't, I didn't know why. I I wasn't asleep. I didn't know, and then I saw the sun start coming up. I was like, oh damn. I was like, this man gonna wake up. But like I said, like fully rested. That shit was too funny. I don't know how I did that. Now, if it uh I think it being tequila has something to do with it, though. Okay. Versus, yeah, if it was brown, it'd be over with. Yeah, those are two different feelings for me. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So I think I think um, either way, that was that was a great night. I'm too fulfilled.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think that's as like I I like that type of night, but I don't want to make it every week. I want it to be like a milest a milestone. Like we did something to accomplish a night like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So I think that that maybe that would be a good way to try to treat ourselves is like, hey, set milestones for ourselves and we cross that, we can do that. Yeah, no, for sure. Yeah, that was, yeah, like actually like I'm good for like a couple weeks.
SPEAKER_03:Right, right. Yeah, especially after Thanksgiving and all that. I I'm just I'm all across the board, just like fulfilled, even with the the race. So sit at the I I'm I'm actually experiencing now the effects or not the the the some of the benefits of everything I've been doing uh in the outside world. So yeah, I'm just taking all that in and and and uh now I just feel like it's it just lock in and kind of take it more serious. Uh, because I do have fun with it, and then I realize uh shit, I'm out here. Like this is time to capitalize on the you know where you're at. Whenever you have motion, it's so hard to get motion back after you lost it. It will take a long ass time. And to have it right now or to have whatever this is, it just it makes me feel like, okay, let's take this serious, you know.
SPEAKER_00:Right. So yeah, because I I agree, and that just reminds me of like how cooking with Kaya was a was a big thing for a little bit, right? Yeah, and so I'm now I see like influencers talk about her and things like you know, it was like you know, essays written about, you know, like hey, what does this mean? Like, uh is this good for the culture, you know, and then so I just hear bigger and back and forth. And now that like if she phased out for uh some time and try to kind of regain that motion and how difficult it is. Yeah, it's not yeah, easy.
SPEAKER_03:I remember I had killed my page before two or three times. Um yeah, that was it, it it isn't the same. It isn't the same. Like it took me a long time to get wherever I'm at right now. So uh yeah, that that that is definitely one thing that I say to anybody, especially your first time, your first time, when you first catch wind, like you have to take that shit like very seriously. Cause as soon as you lose that, you're not new anymore. It's not the trick ain't new. So, you know, whether that's music or this or that, that you know, the one-hit wonders, like you hear them for the first time, or you hear uh anybody, how Drake sounded when he first came out. Um I don't know, you remember like Boss Man D Lo, like you know 1200 for the like it's new, it's a new trick. And then if you don't stay on that shit, then it's it's very difficult, extremely difficult to get that back.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. And you've been staying relevant across platforms for a minute. That is actually very impressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And but that also speaks to the grind, like you've been doing this for so long, you got experience, and it says something to you still love it.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, yeah, facts, yeah, yeah. You cannot get into something long term if I mean you you can't get into something um that doesn't have instant gratification um and not love it, it's over with for you.
SPEAKER_00:Like this, I like I love podcasting. Uh-huh. I may not love the back-end work, you know. Yeah, I I love love very much my realm. Like when I first started in it, it was that the love was like I I'm impressed by myself by how much I loved it in the beginning, to where I'm listening to the whole thing, you know, from front to back. I make a small little edits on each, you know, podcasting, you know, and how much time I put into it. That love quickly diminished when I was like, you know what I mean? Like I was Luka Doncic or LeBron LeBron James in 06, like, hey bruh, I'm carrying this whole shit. You know what I mean? Somebody gotta shoot a three every once in a while. Like, it can't be just the podcast to where y'all in at. We there's you know, there's practice that needs to be happening, you know what I mean? There's a lot of little things to make us bigger because I think our podcast was really, really good. Um, it was just that outside of that, everybody had their own lives, and you know, the the commitment to make it grow wasn't there outside of what I wanted. You know, they had the idea of growth, but they didn't, you know what I mean? They needed a team there, and of course, we don't have the funds for that.
SPEAKER_03:Oh, right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. And there's not a pot that we're all putting in. It's really just kind of me for the most part. I did, you know, if it if I wasn't financing 95% of it, it just kind of wasn't happening. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:No, uh, yeah, with anything, like you really gotta love what it is. Cause yeah, I was surprised too, just seeing y'all's podcast and how long y'all did that for. It was a long time. Yeah, and I don't know anybody who well, maybe Rob, but like I don't know anybody who does that every single week, like over and over and over again for a very long period of time.
SPEAKER_00:Cause I look it back on the thing, you know, now very much hindsight is like it shouldn't have taken us that long to put video out. Uh-huh. Yeah, we should have been doing that from the beginning, but you know, I'm just trying to m do the pot learn the podcast game. And whether that's, you know, finding out how, hey, let's find software on how to put um like where we had the Michael Jordan thing, like or the uh the rook ross where he does a haw. Or I can't even think of what you call him, but like having like little sound bites to where we can click and play. It's like, oh, y'all like that? Let's so let's find something out there, let me iPad, you know, and then figure it out how to put apply it to the podcast. Oh, let's let me find out how to, you know, um click things up and you know, add it in the podcast format and to where I had a rewind, uh rewind button. So it's like a lot of little things that I enjoyed the the nitty and gritty things about it. But then I overall I should have just had it on video and just been able to learn that as well because that could have helped grow. And but then we didn't even really have a social media game attached to it. So I was like, bruh, I gotta do this and that, and we all sharing this joint equally. Like the commitment's not there now. It's a now it's a uh uh before it's like maybe a five to ten hour a week part-time job. This is turning in 20 hours, you know what I mean? Like this is taking so much, and I just need to, you know what I mean? We gotta we gotta love it together, and I think they did. Um, but it was just was when everybody was kind of doing their own thing, it really kind of started once Tate moved to Houston. Now, yeah, yeah, now uh, you know, some of the relationships wasn't as strong as when Tate was there. Yeah, yeah, because he was kind of the bond between me and the other co-hosts, yeah. And I I liked him, you know what I mean, but you know, and so it we and we maintained it for a little bit, but it was just like, hey, we got our own lives.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, but uh did it just kind of like fade out or was it like a decision?
SPEAKER_00:No, it fade it out, yeah. And I I I was I was kind of with them too, because then at the time I was like not putting out the podcast as quick as I did, and um, and it just kind of got to a thing to where it just slowed down and we just did our own thing, so it just fizzled out. Um so it didn't have a planned discontinuing, yeah. Um, but no, I yeah, there's a lot of what I loved and a lot of like even I wish some you know co-hosts could come on and talk about it and be a guest, you know. But you know, I think now it's to focus on where I gotta play my part as well by learning new things because I what's been difficult is the of now having a full-time job. With Uber, I could have put my hands in a lot of places and not felt them. But with since I have a full-time job, my business has been uh haven't really been working on that like I should have. And then um then the podcast, I can only have so much time commitment. Like I said, if it's like not Monday or Tuesday, it's probably not gonna be recording this week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So um, so it's just trying to find a healthy balance um with it all because I really do wish I had the same time commitment, and you know, so I gotta revisit my life as a whole and I was like, hey Justin, what do you want to do? Do you want to be in corporate and scale up from there, or do you want to go back to kind of the hustle and bustle and kind of create your own? And you know, as I'm looking through it all, I I love that love having the my own schedule now now. When I look back at it, was that as disciplined as it should have been? No, but there's a lot of things that I loved about it. Like, hey, waking up on your own time. I'm sure you realize that how yeah, how beautiful is because you got your your your own job, but that's very much at your own pace, and it's what you do. So what may take somebody five uh five hours may take you too. Uh yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03:So so no, it's definitely uh it's an amazing feeling. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, being single too. Oh, absolutely, absolutely. Like a lot of a lot of things just lifted up, you know, uh a lot of space and time to kind of figure myself out. Yeah. So that that that does happen it happens often. I I try to I'm able to just like live and also like look in the mirror.
SPEAKER_00:And you know, I like you say I can get up whenever I want and this and that, but um so I think it's at this point is um just kind of get out the debt I'm in, and that's really my what my biggest concern is. Then I can revisit some of the things I want to do. Because yeah, now I I feel, you know, I I still got my 401k, still got my um RA, yada yada. So um that I could live like this and be cool, but it's you know, I gotta visit what's fulfilling and what I love. Yeah, yeah. And so um I very much love this, but it's just like the time commitment is like, dang, I gotta be up in the morning. You know what I mean? So it's it's finding a healthy balance, which which I'm sure we'll get there as long as we still have the idea of wanting to make an Instagram.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, for sure. No, um, like I said, I I love uh I love all this stuff. It's definitely I'm I'm still in it. You know, my mom, my mom, she's trying to be a content creator now. Okay, yeah. Yeah, and how's that going? It hasn't started yet, but I got the files and I'm supposed to be editing all this stuff. So and it it just it just brings me back to what we're talking about because um she was like, oh yeah, you know, like I I I I want to get a whole bunch of views on the first one, and da da da da da. I'm like, man, I'm on year number what, and I'm still trying. So I'm like, I I don't you gotta just love it. As long as you love it, it's it's fine, whatever happens. But you can't really can't go in anything thinking like, all right, this is this shit gonna blow and da da da da. I'm still laying bricks down for my brand and all that. I don't know what year it's on. This this this year if Kai is nine, this is year eight, and that's just for Ray So Silly. That ain't even the rest of the shit that I did before then. So nah, people really gotta like I don't know. Everybody got like dreams and ambitions and all this type of stuff, but I don't think they like love it for real. Or um people don't usually water that because of the responsibilities of really just being on earth for real. Gets in the way of that. But I feel like for me, it just eats at my soul when I don't when I'm only doing things that I don't necessarily love. Yeah, I'm not I'm not a happy person for real. Yeah, now I be in this bitch happy like two days ago, or right right before we uh uh went. I'm in this bitch just laughing. I'm like, I I'm not even laughing at anything. I'm like, I'm I'm like a happy person right now. Like this is totally different from many years of my life. So I I I I hope that for everybody. Like it's it's a very um I don't know, just being happy is sometimes just feels like just a blessing in itself, just to be happy. Right. And do you think that you're um you're what's your mom's niche? I guess that's true. She she's in front of a green screen right now. She's she's just trying, she's just having fun. Um uh uh um like doing covers for songs or like acting like she's Whitney Houston and this or acting like So kind of doing what you're doing. I I'm trying to get her more on that board, because that'd that'll be crazy. I can I can help a lot on that, you know. But she said, she was like, Yeah, you know, I um she just called me the other day uh with her and my aunt. She was like, Yeah, you know, I really like the Whitney Houston one. I think that's my first video. And then my aunt was like, girl, you just she did what I did, what I do, which is like somebody says something on the other side, and then she says something on her side and flips the conversation. And she, I was like, you know, that's probably the route that you want to go with stuff, because this is what I've been doing. She's like, Yeah, but I'm talking about Whitney Houston. She said, uh, you know, you you be you you you try to get like millions of views, but like I want to get billions of views. I was like, clearly I don't know shit. Clearly, I don't know shit. But um, nah, it's it's it's it's all fun. And going back to what we were saying, it's just like that makes people happy. Like she got a job, she got, you know, stuff she got going too, but it's it's something different when I could see she's starting to call me more. And it's just like she wants to talk about this stuff, you know, and you could just you could just hear the smile on the other end of the phone. And like people need that. So yeah. Where are we at? 56.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think we did it.
SPEAKER_03:Um or you got something you want to talk about? I I'm gonna just it's cool.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I mean, I got stuff for you. If you want to keep going, we can go.
SPEAKER_03:Because there's the one I got, but um well, I was just going to uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh well what what what did you have?
SPEAKER_00:Okay, so um so Kamora Lee's daughter. Um, you know, uh do you remember when she was kind of like upset at her dad because her dad wasn't essentially funding her lifestyle? Um and she wasn't giving her any money. Well, now she's dates an older man and like at like over 30 years. And this I don't know if we've ever had that conversation, and this kind of spins off of cougars. But for you as a father, if your 19-year-old daughter comes with uh a 40-year-old man, what are your thoughts on that? And he loved her, he loves her, he l he loves her, treats her well, does well, um, treats her right. Is love love to you?
SPEAKER_03:Hell no. Hell no, what? No, I had to no, we're gonna have to talk or something, but I mean she's out of my hands at that point. But I would not be with that. Okay. I don't think I'd be with that. So what's your apprehension about it? Um It just it feels weird. It just feels weird. Okay. Yeah, like if I'm if I'm if if we damn near the same age, I just don't see that I I don't see that sitting well with me at all. Yeah, I feel like I did something wrong. I mean, if you I know I didn't, but I'm saying like if that were to happen, I feel like something in our household wasn't structured right or something. Like, why are you with this this 45-year-old man?
SPEAKER_00:Uh so for me is what if you did everything right and you told her the guidance or like what to look for in a man and that's who he is. Yeah, she found him. Yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Hey, you wanted somebody who loves you, treats you well, respects you, you know, cares for you, is willing to protect, and you know, somebody who's a provider, a leader. Yeah, you didn't say, hey, but he can't be 20 years older than me. You know, yeah, you know what I mean? So she found everything that you described in him. He's just older. Uh-huh. So I'm saying you couldn't have did anything wrong if that's the game you gave her and she abided by that.
SPEAKER_03:I don't see me sitting well with it. I don't see me sitting well with it. Um, even I don't know if you saw this a clip with Blueface and like some new girl that he maybe did a weekend or something that they were together. I don't know. Or if it is his new girl. But it was a clip with him, her, and Blueface's mom outside. And then uh his mom was like, Yeah, I just didn't know. And then the girl's like, uh, oh uh, yeah, the the mom was like, Yeah, I just didn't know. And she was calling me mama and stuff, and then Blueface was like, What's wrong with that? She was like, I didn't know she was 45. And then I'm like, oh, okay, like that's kind of like the same thing that we're talking about. Like the mom is just like, something's weird about this. She's close to my age. I feel like I would this it would be natural to feel like that. Like, do you think you could like you could see that?
SPEAKER_00:I mean, I'm not, I don't have a child, so it's different to put in my shoes. But like I said, if he I can see the it being weird that you have dating uh older individual, somebody who's close in age with me, because it feels like he you're being tricked in a way. Yeah, but yeah, but I'm saying I'm not saying this is like um like of course you're gonna have your first time impressions, but. But I'm just saying, if you know, if all those qualities you know are there. Like this is not saying, hey, what if? I'm saying, hey, according to the scenario, that all the he meets all the great qualities in him. If, if he meets that and I know that for a fact, then I'm cool with it because I you're in good hands. You're in somebody who's going to die for you. Who's who's who's who who is look who's looking out for your best interests. That's that's like for me, like my mom is like, you know, I can that's how I look at it. I was like, I know she's in good hands. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Regardless of everybody else's flaws. It's like, okay, he's he's willing to, you know, make sure she's at her doctor's appointments, taking care of her. He does well, he's ambitious. You know what I mean? Those are good hand qualities that I know that I feel good about. Like, hey, I don't gotta worry about it because somebody else is gonna worry about her just as much as I would. You know.
SPEAKER_03:Okay, I mean it would be a sense of I don't even want to give it credit for real. Like, I I I get exactly what you're saying. It just that trick thing. Like, I kind of don't it's hard, it's hard to say because that though there are so many relationships that's like that, especially in the um in the industry, like uh or even Karuchi, ain't she dating uh Deion Sanders or something? Yeah, yeah. Like it's stuff like that that's always happening. Um, so I can see how it could happen. I just just as a father, yeah, like my little girl, it does feel like she's being tricked in a way.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, and don't you think a young man can trick her?
SPEAKER_03:Yeah, but you gotta learn, baby girl.
SPEAKER_00:No, no, but same way, same way. So what so what so in other words, you're like hating, yes. Oh no, no, no, no, I am okay. That's not where I was going with it. Because I think that we had um we talked about uh I could see myself as somebody younger though. I could not that right, right, right. Yeah, um you remember the conversation we had about like hey, you know, being honest, having those tough conversations, like and how tough they are to have. And so so say if we're in that conversation, like, hey, I have to tell you the truth, as like I like you, but I know I don't see you as my wife. Like, what if you never have that conversation with her? And but hey, I told you that this wasn't, you know, that we just kicking it, you know what I mean? If you have that conversation with her, and or you know, you don't have that like a follow-up, is that tricky? Like, like, for example, I'm gonna make it a little bit more clear. So if you was the father of that child and she she tells you everything about the guy, and um, and then she's hurt when you don't take it any further or you find interest with somebody else and that's who you go with. Do you feel like damn he disrespecting my daughter?
SPEAKER_03:Wait, I'm getting confused.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, people. All right, so let me okay. So say you have let me paint it a little bit more clear because I feel like I can see where you got lost. All right, so you have your daughter. Yes, she's telling you about a man, and that man, um, he's like he they he says, Hey, I do like you, but you know, I'm single, I'm kind of doing my own thing. Um, and then she's then, but y'all doing very relationship things, y'all hanging out a lot, y'all are giving each other, you know, gifts and things like that. Y'all taking each other on dates, and she's telling you all about like, hey, I'm starting to love them, but then you have um that man goes out and dates somebody else and pursues her and has a relationship with her and now they're together. Did that boy trick him, trick your daughter? I don't think so.
SPEAKER_03:If he said if he said that they if he laid it out and said that that's kind of like her fault.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. So yeah, I and I I feel you. I mean, he so and I guess what now that I'm describing that situation, what is trick what is what is your daughter falling for? What is he tricking her to do? It's just a feeling.
SPEAKER_03:It's like it's not it's not necessarily that he is tricking her, but I do know that for the most part older men can get younger women faster because they're more developed and more to whatever. It seems like it's almost like cheating a little bit. You know, I I would rather her to be equally yoked, but um, it just seems like another 20-year difference. That's a whole nother her. Like that's a whole nother 20 years. Um it just feels it's it's something about it just feel I don't have an exact answer, but it's something about it just feels like I don't even know the term for it.
SPEAKER_00:I don't even know the term for it, but it just feels like it's just it that it's something that just does doesn't feel right to you about it. But I mean, okay, so that you can also say that when we talk about the cougar situation. Yeah, it's like okay, they're 20 years old, why do they want a young man?
SPEAKER_03:I ain't gonna marry her. I I mean, I don't know. I haven't stepped into that world, nor did I but goddamn my shit just stopped. Oh, okay. All right, well this is two for the culture. We'll be back.
SPEAKER_00:We'll be back.