Two for the Culture
Two for the Culture is brought to you be Steven Rey and Justin Devonte. This is the podcast for the ages! Both Steve and Justin has been friends for over a decade plus and will give you a genuine approach on news and culture with humor and love. I promise this will be one of your favorite podcasts that you will not get enough of!
Two for the Culture
Anthony Joshua's Fatal Car Accident & The Truth About Working for Your Lover
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Holidays, Family, And Work Grind
SPEAKER_00And we are back with another episode of Two for the Culture. I'm Justin Devante. I'm Stephen Ray. Yes, sir. We're back. Back. How you feeling? Feeling great. Feeling good. I got you.
SPEAKER_02What you uh, how was how's Christmas?
SPEAKER_00Christmas was cool. You know, once you get older, it's really about serving serving other people. That's just essentially how it goes. You know, yeah, you your money just comes out. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Any money, any money that comes in gets quickly taken away. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. By everybody, yeah, like it's gonna be kids that be asking about stuff that come over at Christmas that you even think about, you know, but like PS5. And then that's immediately no. But yeah. I was like, oh shoot, I did need to give my nephew something. So uh huh. But you know, they're gonna come in true fashion and send the uh, you know, the request cash app. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02So I guess I'm glad I I saw my family on Thanksgiving.
SPEAKER_00Right, yeah, yeah. So they they sent the they sent 50 bucks. Well, like one uh sent it early that morning, and then the other one just now sent it today. He's like, dang, I forgot to hit him up for that. Yeah, yeah. Oh my god. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dang or hidden leaks. Yeah, exactly exactly. Yeah, but nonetheless, I had the 50 aside set for him. Oh I figured he'll be around the corner sooner or later. That's so funny. Yeah, yeah. So um, but yeah, so it was it was cool though. You know, I got to chill for a little bit. Um what you mean? Like with family, like day off, you know, chill because um Thanksgiving and um Christmas is the only days that we have that we're like officially not working. Right. Like any other day we are, you know, turn of course not 24-7, but um we're working every day unless it's those two days. Yeah. So of course I'll I'll have days off, but you know, somebody else will be working.
SPEAKER_02So not um uh uh Veterans Day, whatever. Exactly.
SPEAKER_00Those things business center is open every day. So I don't fuck with Martin Luther Kingdom. Uh I mean Martin Luther Kingdom. You're saying Ford doesn't fuck with Martin Luther Kingdom. No. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, um, so we're open every day of the week, um, except for Christmas and Thanksgiving. And then right next day we're going. So New Year's, we'll be working, I'll be working for New Year's, New Year's Eve.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah, it definitely seemed, I mean, uh uh when I was younger, it definitely was like, damn, they got us working on these days and this. But when you get older, it's just like, you know, I'll
Mom As Creator And Being Appreciated
SPEAKER_02catch y'all tomorrow. I'll catch you when I get off work. You know, you know how this goes. That's uh my mom and my dad always say, ah, damn, I gotta I gotta edit my mom video. I forgot she's trying to be an influencer now.
SPEAKER_00I got you. Jeez. And uh are you able to give her feedback and like, hey, you know what, you need to re-record this one. I ain't gonna do that. You just let her have fun. Okay, you know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_02I feel like that's that's that's the the um the main thing that I enjoy about uh uh uh uh her wanting to like hop into that space. She's just having fun, you know what I'm saying? And then um, you know, she's just getting older, like my whole family, you know, your parents and all that, everybody's getting older or whatever. And you could just tell people just want to have fun, you know. So I I'm really happy to see how excited she is with that. You know, she's she be calling me now. I don't even be knowing it, but like her sister be on the line, or my aunt, like both of them just be talking, and then uh uh uh my aunt she watches all of my content, like everything, you know. It is sometimes it's like you sure you want to see like this type of content, da da da. But uh, but but to sum it up, you know, I I'm really happy. First of all, this coffee is hidden. Yeah, I I can feel it. But um she she just having fun, man. It's just really cool to see um your parents or your people just like enjoy themselves, right? Yeah, because I've been doing it for I don't know how long, you know, it's in the ups and downs, but like I thoroughly enjoy what I do. It's fun, it's funny. Uh there's a smile on my face. So I would love if other people around me are feeling that, whatever it may be. I I may not ever laugh at it or ever really get it, but as long as they laughing and shit, like that's that's what it's about. And it's she's doing something similar to what you're doing? Or uh she should. She'll surf, but no, she's um she's just starting out uh uh right now. She just it's kind of like doing covers.
SPEAKER_00Like singing.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, like lip singing. Like lip singing, um like Whitney Houston, Diana Ross, stuff like that. She's gonna evolve from that, but that's just the first things that she wanted to do.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_02Well, that's what she lets you do. It's all good. Right. It's all good.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, so no, that's act that is cool. That's something that she's finding a hobby within herself. So it sounds like your dad won't be in any of those videos. Hell no. I got you.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. She uh I I think he just doesn't get it, you know. But I you know, it was a lot that he didn't get about me either. So I I I just love the environment of people allowing you to and what does he get?
SPEAKER_00Like when you say the whole thing, yeah, like having joy out of it or what?
SPEAKER_02Um just like like picture picture like before. Um Well, I I don't know the dynamic because I'm not really there when you know they're talking about all this stuff, but it just seems like my mom thinks like something is funny or whatever, and then he just like doesn't get the joke. Okay, I got I got you. Yeah, okay. So, but I mean that was the kind of the same thing with me too. I used to put my dad in my videos, and then after it came out, he's just like, I didn't know you were gonna curse that much.
SPEAKER_00Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_02Well, he's so he's critiquing the video, kind of critiquing, kind of like, you sure you want to do you sure, you sure? You know, um that that's just what I feel is kind of happening. Uh I'm not I'm not fully sure, but like I said, man, as long as the environment is like just do you get get that creativity out. Fuck it. Right. Yeah. So I'm I'm happy for yeah, no, like I I have to edit the video stuff.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, no, that's just more work. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I don't even want to say that because it's my mom, but I'm like, no, all right, I'm going to for sure let you know that I'm doing more work. Yeah, there's no way around it. Yeah. Right, right, right. Because if you just think it's easy, then it's no appreciation there. Well, you know, I'm working hard to make you happy.
SPEAKER_02Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00So if you're just thinking like, oh, he he got the time, he got all day, you know, it'll take him 10 seconds. Yeah, then you're not gonna appreciate what I'm actually doing for you. So yeah, I'm gonna let you know.
SPEAKER_02That's just me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah. Maybe look like a star.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because then I if I'm on the other side of it, I'll feel bad without giving that appreciation. You know what I mean? Right, right, right, right, right, right, right. So, so I want that like, dang, you've been working this hard and didn't tell me, I would have kept it easy. I thought, you know, you had plenty of time. Yeah, yeah. So it's just people are more considerate when they actually know what's going on. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's a fact. That's a fact.
SPEAKER_00And it feels better, you know, when you're actually appreciated versus you if I mean we take that in our own relationship. Picture how much um the person you date or may date, how much they're like, you know what? I really appreciate everything you do. I'm great that I have a boyfriend like you, husband like you. I couldn't ask for anything better. Like for you to complete, you know, to do something to help fuel your mom's passion. Yeah, there's like no other son can really feel that shoe for real.
SPEAKER_02Facts, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. So that appreciates you as a son, like, you know, hey, I my son is cold at this. Yeah, you know what I mean? But if she thinks that it's not a big deal or it's easy, then there's less appreciation, less consideration there.
SPEAKER_02Facts. No, sorry, yeah. I I I I do feel um it's cool to I mean also even give people that inspiration as well. Um that feels good too, to to to see other people like around you just like, you know, um, not necessarily like feed off of you, but um you're inspiring others, you know, to do their own thing and stuff like that.
SPEAKER_00I think what makes uh what makes you talented, not only outside of your creative mind, is that you make it look easy. Like people don't know how that's actually a talent. Yeah,
Talent, Ease, And Mastery
SPEAKER_00yeah. You think so? I think so. Yeah, yeah. When it's clean and it looks good and it seems seamless, that's that's a talent.
SPEAKER_02Like how easy shit be looking.
SPEAKER_00Exactly. And we when we was watching that game when we was at that um that one place, I was like, bruh, these guys are cold because look how fluid they are.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And you know it's difficult. You know, picking up a ball dribbling between your legs is how difficult it is and how easy they make it look, like anybody could do it. Yeah, that's how cold you are.
SPEAKER_02I I can see, I appreciate that. Yeah, no, I can see that. I can see that. Yeah, uh I'm um well when I compare it to that, the first person I thought of was like D Rose in his prime. And it was just like oh my god, I was like, this nigga's amazing. Like, and nobody else can move like this for some reason. Or Steph Curry, he's not even human for real.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, like even when the Rubik's cubes, if you didn't have any idea what a Rubik's cube was, if you saw like a master do it and just start flicking, and oh all you're doing is matching the colors with each block, yeah. But until you pick it up and do it and be like, oh no, this is actually hard as hell. I don't even get it. Trash, trash.
SPEAKER_02I don't think I ever solved it by myself. No, I'd have to I used to go on the website, the Rubisky some Rubicy website, and you input the colors on the block and it tells you which way to go until you you you finally have it. I think the most I've ever done was like two sides by myself.
SPEAKER_00Isso yeah, used to do those. Um she married now, ain't it? Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02I saw it on the uh on um online.
SPEAKER_00Oh, that's dope. Congratulations.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I think I mean, that's really cool.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's absolutely amazing.
SPEAKER_02That's crazy. Yeah, people get married out here.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I love you. I would love to be, yeah, yeah, yeah. If it was my time, I'll be at I'll be here for it. But yeah, hey, I'm not not rushing it. But nah. Uh, but yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, she was cold with the Rubicie, so anytime I see one, I remember her doing it, you know. Or whatever. Yeah. It's fire. Um, but yeah, so
Tragic News About Anthony Joshua
SPEAKER_00you want to get into it? Yeah, you got some stuff? You know, I'm always kind of leading the topic, but if you got anything.
SPEAKER_02Well, did you hear about dude uh today? The the dude who broke his jaw, broke uh what's his name, jaw? Joshua. What's this nigga name?
SPEAKER_00Uh, you talking about um Josh Jake Bondy Joshua. Anthony Joshua, yeah. What about him?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, uh he was in Nigeria and uh he got into a car crash. And um uh uh he was like pulled out of the car like from a bunch of people out there. And then you could he first of all it was like uh at least 20 young men with 20 20 like young niggas, like boys, like with their phones out like this. Okay. I mean, naturally, yeah, but um he was like being dragged out the car like this. He was like, ah two people passed away. Um his uh it says his uh his close friend and his coach. This nigga just won the thing, yeah. So like both them niggas died.
SPEAKER_00Dang, how that like how that happened? Was it head on collision?
SPEAKER_02Um, I don't know. I I'm not really sure. Uh I don't have it in the tab right now, but um it was a terrible accident for sure. Yeah, so I don't know how this man survived that shit.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because I think he may be part Nigerian or something like that.
SPEAKER_02That would make sense.
SPEAKER_00I think I'll have to look it up. I think but uh this is my first time hearing it. You know, I don't really know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, like just happened either this morning or um yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Because all you know, all I have is YouTube right now.
SPEAKER_02Oh, uh-huh. Um so survives horrific crash in Nigeria, they killed two, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, well that's uh that's extreme. It's uh I know he's British, but hold on, let me see. Anthony Joshua. Is he Nigerian? Um yeah, I guess I can't find it that quick. They just give him uh okay, maybe maybe I think he is like some some somewhere down the line of his ancestry. But no, that is actually very crazy. I can only imagine you coming, you know, visiting family or having a little fun. I mean, that shows you how life can end just a split second.
SPEAKER_02That is wild. Yeah, I definitely thought that. I'm like, bro, this nigga just won. That was uh a very monumental um accomplishment for your life, and then like just like that, just like it he could have just been gone as well. Easily that's fucking crazy. Absolutely, and I I feel like it probably wasn't even I mean, I I don't know. I don't know the situation or or how it happened, but it it just seemed like it I don't know. For some reason, I I just feel like it wasn't like them wilding out. Like these are grown men, these ain't like I mean the people that that that was in the car, I guess, with him. It doesn't seem like they be wilding like that, like going 100 miles per hour and like that and shit like that. So I don't know what happened, but either way, that is uh very tragic.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely. He says brother.
SPEAKER_02Uh-uh.
SPEAKER_00Friend and uh coach coach, yeah. Yeah, I mean, they're damn near your brother if they're traveling with you. That's family for sure. Yeah, no. Um hearts go out to Anthony Joshua. We'll be praying for you. Hopefully,
Car Crashes, Near Misses, And Insurance
SPEAKER_00everything. Um, you get the healing that you need, definitely. Um, just yeah, so it's just crazy to hear for sure.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, no, that's wild as hell. Have you ever been in a car crash?
SPEAKER_00Car accident, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Like a bad one. Um, oh my god, this shit could have been I mean it hurt my back.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, but you know, I mean, this I've had near misses for sure. Yeah, that's several near misses that could have ended terribly. Uh yeah, had you know, texting and driving looking away when I was younger. Well, yeah, and you know, I I still have be distracted driving, but nonetheless, yeah, this one this one girl, she was like, Hey, Justin, you know, look at the road. And then that so I had to scrr. Otherwise, we would have been rear-ended them folks and would have been dead for sure. That was in the focus. Yeah. So so that that near me stands out. Otherwise, it's been like little stuff, yeah, yeah. That's not even that really big of a deal. Um, so yeah, no, I um I I don't see myself ever like going crazy in a car accident. Have you been in a car accident though?
SPEAKER_02Uh yeah. But nothing, nothing bad, nothing bad. The only thing that ever scared me was when I was doing too much. And I was coming from a high school game in my dad's car. And yeah, I think I said this before, but uh um um um uh there was another friend who left the game as well, and they were in their car, I was in mine, and then we kind of like slightly raced. It was like on a highway, and I remember my homies was in the car. It was like two of my best friends, one of the list, and um I hit 100 miles per hour, where I was about to hit 100 miles per hour, something like that, and the car slightly jerked. Like it was so slight, it was like a little left or a little right, or some shit like that. And I thought that if that shit were to happen again, this shit is just it's gonna be all bad. Like it was, it was it was so slight of a jerk, but I knew that if that shit ever like happened again, the car probably would have turned right or and it probably would have spun and starts flipping or some shit. And that shit scared the fuck out of me. So I'll never be the person that's like doing too much on the highway.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. And not only that, yeah, we're a lot older now, so yeah, that going fast ain't really that fun like it used to be. You know, yeah, yeah. We just season you like, hey, y'all got it. You know what I mean? Facts.
SPEAKER_02So I don't even want to be in a car with a nigga doing it.
SPEAKER_00That and that was exactly what I was about to bring up, is like I don't even like to drive in people's cars that don't got insurance.
SPEAKER_02Uh uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Everybody got a run.
SPEAKER_00Oh no, not even that. I'm just saying, like, if somebody hits you, then you gotta hope they have insurance. Otherwise, your injuries are not gonna be taken care of. Uh-huh. They don't have medical payments, which is like a policy attached to um people who, if you get in an accident, you have insurance. So uninsured motorist coverage is absolutely essential to have when you have insurance policy and uh medical payments. So if you ain't gotten that, if we get in a bad car accident, rather it's not you could be the one who gets rear ended. I gotta hope you rely on them to have insurance for it. Otherwise, I'm gonna be asked out on my medical bills.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I'm cool. I get that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. So I would yeah, I would like to drive like sometimes like bro, I'll drive myself. You know what I mean? Yeah, or I'll take an Uber.
SPEAKER_02I uh uh one time when I was younger, I didn't have insurance yet, but a car wasn't in my name yet. It was something like that to where I knew I didn't have insurance, and I tried to park the car in this very tight, in this very tight like space. And I hit some dude's car, and it was just me in the parking lot. And I knew if I went in, I was like, hey, anybody in this white, whatever, then I could have like handled it like that. That was the only time ever in my life. I'm like, bro, I ain't got insurance, I ain't got this. I'm gonna just give it to God. And I left. Okay, but it wasn't noticeable. It was if he came outside, be like, man, what the fuck? That was the only time I ever did that. But um, yeah, so that that's why I said that earlier. Cause I'm pretty sure people people do that all the time. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, no insurance, they hit a car, it's just flee.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and I'm just gonna be mad that I gotta wait for you if I hit your car. You know, like I gotta wait outside for them to come out.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. No, I would I would have walked in. I mean nowadays, yeah, I I would've walked in and like handled that. Uh But uh I'll probably just leave it a note. Hey bro, you called me. I just hit your shit. That's actually a good idea. But no, no, no. I knew the people that was in it. I think I knew whose car was. I think. Or I had a I had an idea. Oh, yeah. I can't remember. I can't remember fully. But I thought I thought I had an idea of it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Either way. Yeah, it car accidents are just so easy to have to. Right. Like, you know, I mean when we see them all the time. Like whether it's raining, hydroplaning is easy to do. See people spawned. I was in a wreck.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I was in a wreck one time in Houston.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so um there is a specific time to this wasn't a car accident, but you know, you have those electric scooters that be downtown and everywhere. Um, so this is before it was like Mad Max, before they actually had some type of red uh regulations on them. So you can go damn near haul last
Scooters, City Risk, And Safety Tradeoffs
SPEAKER_00with 30, 40 miles per hour on those scooters. Damn. Yeah, fast. So like I would see people tumble over them all the time. Definitely when they first implemented them. Oh yeah, yeah. So you so people don't even got a feel for them. I just got like these visuals in my head. Oh, like, no, I'm just saying, like, it was natural for me to see people stumble and fall all the time.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, yeah. On them.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, yeah. So um they had that's why they had to like the city was like, we're getting rid of these if y'all don't put some type of regulations on those. Okay. Because we're getting a high uptick in ER visits because of these. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. They got a own department.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So uh another one. Yeah, exactly. Scooter. Scooter. Uh so I remember one time I was about to make a left um at the light, the scooter went right past me. And I was like, there's no way I could have seen him ever.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I was like, I'm going to kill somebody. Right. And it's just gonna be what it is. Yeah. Because there's no way I can stop that. Yeah, because as a scooter, they're pedestrianslash vehicle. Right. So they can operate in either either mode. Essentially. That's that's how they treat treat the rules. I don't know the exact regulation. I'm sure they have to act like a vehicle or be a bike lane or something. But they they're pedestrian slash vehicle. So they'll either be in your lane, be on the sidewalk, and and they go super fast. At that time, they go a little bit slower now. But uh at the time, they went super fast. I was like, I'm just gonna hit these guys and it's gonna be what it is.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. But I don't think have I almost hit somebody, I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, you got something?
SPEAKER_00Um keep going. Yeah, because I'm trying to find a way to pivot.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Um, let's, let's, let's, let's see here. What's
Petty Dealbreakers And Dating Self-Awareness
SPEAKER_02the pettiest reason that you stopped talking to somebody?
SPEAKER_00The pettiest reason why I stopped talking to her. Uh do you have one in mind?
SPEAKER_02While I actually this girl recently texted me. And now that now that I think about it, I think I did stop talking to her for some petty ass reason. Like college, like way, way, way back then. What did she do?
SPEAKER_00Like when you say stop talking, you're talking about like as a friend or relationship?
SPEAKER_02I mean like like you trying to get down or what did she do? It was like I think I didn't like the way she put on her lipstick. It was like weird. And then, yeah, yeah. I don't know if that's a petty reason.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I mean, uh yeah.
SPEAKER_02Maybe I could have said something, but I just left it alone.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I have to look up the word petty now that you're saying that, but that's like a a very shallow reason.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, it's a shallow reason. Yeah, I didn't like it. I was like, what are you doing?
SPEAKER_00Um Okay, yeah, I guess that's yeah.
SPEAKER_02Cause it wasn't like how girls sometimes put it over the lips. Like oh like if their lips are right here, they put it if they extend the maybe it maybe. But it was under.
SPEAKER_00Oh, so she didn't get the full lip? Yeah. Okay, you could have corrected her on that. But so she came over multiple times. Petty means something of little important importance or significance. Describes a person who focused excessively on minor details, shows a narrow-minded, mean, or ungenerous attitude. It can also refer to something or secondary rank. Yeah, like like her. So I guess it's Pinky is too long. Yeah. You know.
SPEAKER_02You probably did.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Because yeah, you you didn't have a girlfriend for a very long time. So I think yeah, you probably stopped talking to people for these petty ass reasons.
SPEAKER_00Um, I mean, I I'm trying to think of I can start naming things or why I stopped talking to people. Uh but you know, then the things that are coming in my mind aren't like petty. Like I want black kids. Yeah. So yeah, so I don't so me talking to a white woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So exactly. So is that petty? I don't know.
SPEAKER_02And definitely if I let you know that. He's standing on business.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. Now that I'm out of relationship with like love is love. If I love you, bruh, yeah, I'm not even, you know what I mean? If you're the one, you the one. But um, but for a for a very long time that was the case. And I, you know, and I was very, I wasn't leaving the door open for um a lot of women.
SPEAKER_02Um your ex wrote a book about you, what would the title be?
SPEAKER_00If um Damn I lost a good one.
SPEAKER_02Mine would be this nigga. No, I don't know what would mine be. Hmm.
SPEAKER_00Um so I I feel like that's more of saying how would you think your exes feel about you? Facts. Okay, and so you go. Uh just name name one. You don't have to say some chat, yeah.
SPEAKER_02There's a chapter.
SPEAKER_00You don't have to say the one, but talk about how one ex feels about you.
SPEAKER_02Um you think? Oh, I I don't know. I don't think any of my exes like not fuck with me or whatever. So what would if an ex wrote a book about you, what would the title be?
SPEAKER_00Okay, so I so uh how about we do this?
SPEAKER_02So say there's a chapter in there that says this nigga though, for sure.
SPEAKER_00So say if just pick pick one of your exes. Right, right, right, and they were having a truthful, honest relationship about the girl you're uh um to the girl you're talking to, about you. Uh huh. What do you think they would say?
SPEAKER_02I don't even like the setup for real. Um what would they say about me to the new girl? And this is based off of I think they would be nice. They wouldn't say they wouldn't say anything bad. Just knowing how they all operate. So pick one and how would it be. I think they would say, like, you know, he's he's great. He's um I feel like they would speak highly. You know, like he's great. He they I think they would leave all their other stuff to telling their friends and stuff about that.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so they wouldn't be. I said honest, if they were being honest to him about like, hey, this is me not being emotional,
How Exes See You And Honest Reviews
SPEAKER_00emotional. This is how I took the relationship as, and things you should look forward to or things you should uh I should warn you about.
SPEAKER_02I don't think they would, I don't think they would go into detail, but I think it would be more so like you know, um I don't know how he is now, but uh probably like say all the good things or whatever, and then say, you know, he does have his things, and you know, um like I said, I don't know how he is now, but I just think it'll be a positive conversation. I don't know. Yeah, I I I I've never I've never given uh anything that would like come back to haunt me type shit. Okay.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so in other words, if your exes were single, you pretty much have a door in if you wanted to. No, I didn't say that. Okay, because I mean I mean you you're such a great guy. Like what would they be missing? Why would they not want to come back?
SPEAKER_02Right, that's too funny. Nah, nah, I I I doubt that. But um, you know, like relationships run their course, so you know, I I think I think somewhat highly about um uh uh uh uh a few of my exes, but I I know for a fact I couldn't like be with them just because of everything that you know we went through and shit. They could be somebody new now, but I'm still left with what I went through with you and shit like that. And I'm pretty sure that's kind of the same thing with them, which is why I said I don't think they would say anything bad because they know like the great qualities of me. And it is what years pass now. My last relationship was like a year ago. So yeah, I've had I I didn't get like terrible reviews for real. And if I ever did get a terrible review, then it would be it would be by someone who wasn't their best either. Like we both could we both could be spitting, you know, like when when it comes to that. So it's usually like leveled out um well when it comes to that. So I don't think I don't think they would say anything crazy. You think they would uh uh what was your what's your take on that?
SPEAKER_00Um about me or what my ex was saying.
SPEAKER_02Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00Um I think sh she wouldn't be as h I know based off what what you're saying is however you're saying that you think the ex will be about you, I know she wouldn't probably speak that highly of me. Really? If she was being honest with her and her her views, I don't think so. Um because um I think she she well, she didn't see it the way I saw it. So if if that's if that's the case, I can think a lot of things about myself and think of me as a high, you know, as high character, high moral values. That may she may agree with that, but um she's also gonna of course see it through her own lens. And when I'm pointing out the things, that's she doesn't see what I'm describing. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, so yeah, so it's one thing I can come off as a I'm using just saying something, but I can you can I can say, hey, this is an opportunity for you to fix whatever mistake. You can look at me as an asshole for that. It's just how the perception goes. Um, so I could do what I felt was right, and I could carry a lot of those things I felt right into a different relationship, and they may look at it like actually, you handle this great, but just given the person, I don't I don't I don't think I handled it the way she saw fit. So that for that therefore I feel like she she would be like, you know, hey, Justin is very particular. That's true. Yeah, there's true element. I feel like I'm a lot more easygoing than how people perceive me, but that's true. You know, Justin is stubborn. That is very true. There's no there's no way around that. Um, and then also when like the thing when I remember like meeting her family, and there's like, you know, they ask me, What do you like about Pamela? I say the beautiful, nice things, you know, have like aww, type of thing. And then it's like, what do you like about Justin? You know, he was cool. Exactly. Like, it was to it
Single Vs Relationship: Accountability Mirrors
SPEAKER_00was like silent to where I was like, you know what, like, you know, it ain't about it, you know what I mean? So I'm just like moving on. So I know there wouldn't be if that's the case, then uh I don't think there will be enough like um prose about me. Because you can't come up on uh on the spot then. Yeah, exactly. So I doubt you can say something I think smart, moral character, loves God, goes to church, you know. I don't even think taking care of her my family, even though I do that, will probably be on her list. Because she, like I said, she doesn't see the same way I do. Um, so but yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay, no, I I I can see that. Um, yeah, uh yeah, it's just different perspectives, I guess, for everybody. Yeah, I don't think I don't know. Uh I've had that too, to sit down like with a parent. It's like, so what do you like about my daughter? That puss. Oh my god. The way she threw it back, man. I like this guy. Yeah. I thought of that looking at that. Oh my god. Uh high-fiving with the dad and shit. Yeah. That's too fucking funny. Um, no, no, no, no. I thought about that shit uh the other day though. Just being in relationships and shit. Like, I really like being single right now, but also I'm not gonna get better at relationships until I'm in a relationship. Right. Like, I thought about that the other day. I'm like, damn, I kind of want to be in something so I can get better at being that. I think I told you before, like, when you're single for so long, you get really, really, really good at being single. But you don't get good at being in a relationship. But when you're in a relationship, it's way more uh uh factors and there's way more sides to yourself that you you really gotta tighten up and all that to even like have and in in and and um uh sustain uh actual relationships. It's sort of a different you um with different challenges and shit like that because it's a big ass mirror in front of you. Um I thought about that the other day. I'm like, damn, like I do love being single, but also I'm not getting better at being in a relationship. So uh I thought about that. It was just something that was on my mind.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, yeah, practice makes perfect, and the more times you you're working on something, the better you get. Yeah. Um, yeah, I mean, yeah, sing, yeah, yeah. Single, but I mean, you also gotta pay attention to and look at successful relationships. And or or even even failing relationship, you look like I recognize I would have never thought that had I not seen that from somebody else, that I definitely don't want my partner to participate in X. Like, yeah, I know that you know, now that I've seen you know several women out until 3 a.m. You know, for whatever reason, I don't want my partner to do that. Yeah, yeah. For safety reasons, or you feel like that opens up a more gateway of you know deceit or whatever. Um, so you so either you it's through experience, you're learning it from somebody else. Yeah. And that's really kind of the only way you got to know for real.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, I definitely thought about that. Because it's um, yeah, I don't even know uh when I think about it like that, I don't even know what I need to work on relationship-wise. There's no way to know that unless I'm in a relationship.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and that was what I was kind of saying. The good things about being in a relationship is you it's really you having a a coach or a uh workout partner, the person that's gonna look at you and say, Hey, we need to get this together. Like the the things that you saw as a flaw, that person can very well see it in its true form. Facts. Like, like, bro, you waking up again late, you know what I mean? Oh, like, oh my god. Yeah, yeah. They do not fuck with that shit. Yeah, and you may hate to hear it. Yeah, yeah, but you know deep down, like I hate that she saw that in me. You know what I mean? But it is something I need to fix. Yeah, yeah. Because you first of all, you don't want because it it feels like it's devaluing you in a way. Uh yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, oh, you do this, you smoke blacks? Yeah. Oh, uh you're disgusting. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so exactly.
SPEAKER_00So it's like it's putting a stain on your name because you having some type of character trait or whatever.
SPEAKER_02Um, yeah, so it's a big uh a way bigger form of accountability for sure.
SPEAKER_00It's really putting a mirror to your face and they see you. Yeah, yeah, for real.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Because I mean, see you way more than you see yourselves. Oh, facts. Because I mean, how many times you you're in a camera for a living? How many angles, how many, like, hey, I do this weird twitch. Yeah. Or like I look a little sassy when I see this thing. Yeah, but they see the whole view of you the whole time you're here. So they see all the mannerisms that you may not even see in yourself. Facts. Yeah. Yeah. And over long, yeah. So that's only you're only really going to be. I think that's the greatest part about relationships, and how if you have a really successful uh one who can communicates well and who's and that's somebody you trust to go with the information, I think that's also um, and pardon me if I'm going on a rant. But I think that's also what is hurts men as well, is that we also don't have a relationship to where we fully give them all that trust because of how they look at us too. So like if you you know, you can't tell your wife, I'm scared. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. You can't like it, but sometimes you'll have you'll see that wife that you'll be in the video, he's macho man up, and bruh, the wife is like, Brad, don't, I know you. Don't even, don't even try to fight him. Oh, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, it puts you away, like, I don't want you to go through that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So uh, so but and that's the type of trust that you should, you know, that you having your wife to where she's like, hey, I know you're gonna get your ass kicked, and I love you anyway.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
Vulnerability, Trust, And Sharing Stress
SPEAKER_00You know what I mean? So to to to actually have that uh communication to where you can give them the full, like, hey, I'm a little nervous about doing this speech. You know, all right, well, let's practice some more. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, hey, this wasn't as bad as you said it was, you know what I mean? So, and I think that as men, and I know I have this for sure, is to where you don't want your doubt and fears to express that so they can be like less confident in you.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, in your decision making. It's um It kind of is the the energy is transferred. Yeah. I remember I saw a clip. It was this dude talking to his wife, and he was like, It's only so far that I'll go of telling you everything just because it's supposed to be. I don't know if it's supposed to be, but most of the stress is supposed to be on me because I can handle it. And if I sit here tell you we I didn't make as much money this month as I did last entrepreneur type shit. If I ain't make as much as last month than this month, then you you're probably gonna be like worried a little bit. And then now I'm in a house, and like you could have if I didn't tell you that, then you would have been like the same person, which is like uplifting and this, this, and that. But if I if I if I put some of my stress on you, it makes the environment um more stressful. Absolutely. So yeah, I do see that too. Um, and I saw it, yeah, I absolutely saw it in uh many other relationships. Yeah. Uh so that's that's kind of like a I don't know. I mean, it makes sense, but it's also like, damn, like you can't fully well. I mean, I there I'm pretty sure there are many other women out there that that that that the husband can you know confide and and and have those conversations with them. But I do feel there is a sense of a certain type of energy needs to be like controlled in terms of stress from the man's side. And yeah, absolutely a part of holding the house down in a way.
SPEAKER_00For sure. I I totally agree. And you seeing that is a um uh I feel that totally because it reminds me of like when you talk about absolute trust. I know I'm just kind of segue a little bit. When I was watching football, we have a uh I'm a Green Bay Packers fan. We have our quarterback too, our second string quarterback is uh Malik Willis. And when he's out there, he's doing a great job. Like, I fully trust him at quarterback. Whether we lose, win or lose the game, I fully believe in weak Malik Willis' ability to um push us forward. And that's the same type of trust I want my wife to have in me. Like, hey, regardless, hey, I know you have the ability to fail, and I know you're gonna make mistakes, but I fully believe for you to get the job done.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00So even if we're going through this rough patch, you're telling me about it. All right, I know you can push through it. You know what I mean? All right, you got to Uber 10 more hours uh during the week. All right, you know what I mean? Hey, do you do you need some help finding a solution? Uh we can tackle this together. And you know what I mean? So if having the absolute trust to where it's like, hey, I know we can go bankrupt, but I know your ability, your ambition, and you want to see your kids eat. So I know you're gonna push through it and you're gonna do what you gotta do, and you ain't gonna do nothing stupid or jump out the window for it. Right. You know, so so having that, and and I'm sure there's a lot of people who do have it. Yeah, but uh, but also there's a lot of women who make a lot more than men now too. So that's not even you know, some of the same scenarios that we're talking about, we may not even run run up against because our wives may be making just as much as we do.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. No, it's definitely important choosing the right the right partner.
SPEAKER_00And speaking, would you have a problem with that if you're if your wife was uh making more than you? Making more? Oh like say if you okay, let's let's let's break it down or step back a little bit. Is um so say if you got a um a girlfriend, or not even girlfriend, you're dating somebody, she takes an interest in you, you take interest in her, and she but she makes five hundred thousand dollars a year. Is that too intimidating for you?
SPEAKER_02Uh I wouldn't say it's intimidating. Um you know, just just being I feel like innately, I do want to be able to um uh uh get all the basics and shit, like you know, just providing um you know uh uh uh like housing and just just the like like even if she made that money, I still would want our life to just just being honest. I I still would love to have the chance to be the person that's providing um like the basics of the lifestyle in a way. So even if she did make 500,000, let's say she made 500,000 and I made 200,000. Or I I make 200,000 and she makes like 700.
Money Gaps, Power Dynamics, And Pride
SPEAKER_02So like she could still keep her money and shit, but how about let's let's do that?
SPEAKER_00Because 200,000 is is successful.
SPEAKER_02Like you saying, like I ain't shit.
SPEAKER_00Like, no, you making 30,000. Oh my god. And she makes 500.
SPEAKER_02If I'm making 30,000 and she making 500, um I don't even see it working unless I don't even see it working unless I am diligently striving as much as I can to get like to next steps to change that situation. I don't even see her being attracted to a guy who's making 30k and just is okay with making 30k. That shit ain't gonna work. But like if I make a 30k and she is making 500, but like I'm you could you could see it on me, like something's gonna change. You know, I I feel like that can eventually work.
SPEAKER_00Um well if she's like, hey, come, I have my own business, you come into that.
SPEAKER_02Ooh, I'll help you. I don't think I could do that.
SPEAKER_00Okay I don't think I could do that. He's like, I'll help you, so you're coming into our business.
SPEAKER_02No. As in, like, I don't need to be on the I don't you don't I don't want my name on nothing, whatever, but like if you need help with something, I'll help you. I don't want, I don't, I don't want to be tied in the business. I don't know. I I got I got reservations about that. Talk about it. Yeah, just like I I just don't like mixing business with super close people. Like I at least right now. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, what is this? What are we doing now? You know what I mean? No, not that not not like that. I did think about that too when I said that. I was like, this nigga gonna know I don't fuck with him for real. But like, um uh uh I I've been in situations where I think it just depends on the partner. I think it just this goes back to what I always be saying. I think it just depends on the partner because I feel like I feel like if we create something together, I could see myself doing that more than you have something going and then now I'm a part of your thing. Okay, yeah, I see that, I see that more. Yeah, so like we build a business together and then you know we're teammates and all that type of shit, cool. Or if I have if I if I'm if I'm uh spearheading something and then you want to help me, I like I I love that you'll you'll you'll benefit from that. But like if she has something going, I'll help, but I I don't see me trying to like be a part of that, you know. Okay, I could still I could still be there every single day with you. I could still be there, but I don't need like if it's my woman, I ain't trying to get a split on your shit and all that. Like I'd rather like push you to do whatever it is that you're doing, just because like that's your shit. Like that's that's something that you made and all that, and you I would love for you to benefit with being with me and it grows or whatever, but I uh personally I don't be wanting nothing for real from my woman. So like I'd rather push you to you grow whatever we can make something together, but I I don't really see me um trying to do I never was like that. I never was like that. So most of the times that the the the girls that I've been with, if they were like dreaming big and super ambitious, I would usually help them and not need a credit on anything. Like even if I helped you with half of the shit that you or or you got with me, then your your potential of everything like double, triple, quadruple, I don't really need nothing from you. I rather know how to do that shit myself. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_02If that makes sense.
SPEAKER_00So so can I push back a little bit? Yeah. Okay, because um I know you really well, uh-huh, and I do agree to what you're saying, but so my thought is and tell me if I'm wrong, I feel like you don't want them to have something over you. Because I I do hear you say, I did this and that for you. Uh-huh. You you've said that you know, several times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So so the only time I've ever You do get you do at you do slightly demand the credit in a sense.
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_00But I feel like if she if she here's here's my thought, yeah, is if she's giving you a check, she like, I paid you. You now you now you saying I did this. No, now you can't say I did this and this for you because she gave you the money to do that and that. You know what I mean? Right. And so she effectively has something over your head that you can't, you know, you can't use that card anymore.
SPEAKER_02The only time I've ever said like I did this and this and this, and the only time I've ever done that was when there is a very blatant conversation. You know, there's a conversation where blatantly my efforts are blatantly diminished. So I don't I don't care about having a check from I don't need it to me, it feels weird. Like to, especially if like you're my girl and like we're we're gonna live life together or some shit.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Or that's the goal. I don't need nothing from from you. I'd rather us both get better. Like I said, you have your thing, or if we do come together and make a business and see how it works, cool. But um the only time I've ever said something like that is when words are said or actions are done to make me know you don't even see what the fuck I just did. Like, why you talking to me like that? You know what I'm saying? Why you um uh uh uh uh uh uh just I I in past relationships, I had conversations with women, and sometimes the way they talk and you would think I ain't never did shit at all. That makes me mad. I got you. Absolutely. It ain't about like you giving me a check or put me on the credit of this business. Yeah, no, just like me and you are in a room together, that's it, and you talk, you talking to me like I didn't do nothing for you.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that I don't fuck with. Because what I'm I'm struggling to understand is that if she said if you're making 30k and she's like, she she believes in your talent, you got get talents, and she says, uh I'll just pay you double to work with me. And he's like, Nah, I can't do that. You know what I mean? Like, like that is a level of stubborn that doesn't really quite make sense. Is that you're you're coming to her fold to boost her business, but you're going to instead work more at a job that's paying you less than what you offered somewhere else, and then work on her business for free after that. Like the math ain't math in the world. I think you're right. I think you're right.
SPEAKER_02Maybe I don't want it's just easier. It's easier to know, you know, you ain't got it just seems transactional. Like, I ain't with no girl to be I I ain't trying to be in a transactional relationship. So maybe that's a thing, because now it'll it makes sense what you're saying, but I I do feel like that puts things in a transactional uh relationship. I don't like the feeling of that.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so let's put it in reverse. You make $500,000 and she's um uh so social media director for her um her law firm or whatever. So she makes $40,000 a year and she just handles the social media. And you'll be like, well, shoot, I have a social media business. Yeah, I'm gonna just pay you double. Yeah, come on board. Exactly. Come on, boy. You're great at what you do.
SPEAKER_02And I I need you here. I think I just trust myself in power. I think that's really what it is. Yeah, yeah. Actually, I think that that's about half of it. Now that I'm talking about it, yeah, I think that's about half of it for me. I trust myself in power more than anybody else. Because like if we're going at it or we're again, depends on your partner, depends on who you're with. But I just feel like I would separate the two. Like, you know what I'm saying, the the relationship and the business. I I I would trust myself more if like my partner or somebody is quote working for me or whatever. I I would treat that situation and that power better. Yeah, like I I don't want I don't ever want to be in a situation where I feel like not only could somebody possibly switch up on me, but they have the power too. Like that that does that doesn't make me feel good. Because even if one, we don't work out, or two, um uh uh uh uh uh uh uh we're we're we're in some type of turbulent part of our relationship or whatever. I think I think I've seen that
Owning Your Story And Not Being A Side Character
SPEAKER_02and I've seen me be affected by that to where I don't like somebody having power over me. I think I think that is what it is. So again, it does depend on who who you with and all that type of shit, but I just trust myself in stressful situations and being the person over certain things. Not like as a uh a control freak or um somebody who just needs power. It's just like I just trust myself as a human being more than my person having some type of like power over me.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. And that's good wording, but how I'm understanding it is that you trust people less. Like instead, you're saying you trust you more, but you really trust people less. Because it because it's you're and and I think that I mean I'm I'm the same way, like don't get this confused at all. Yeah, we in the same boat, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's just showing that vulnerability is is tough. Like, um because for you to say I'm willing to not be in a better s situation just so they don't have control over me. Well, that's not how I looked at it, but say saying, hey, I don't I'm not vulnerable enough or trusting enough to that person to do that with. So my next question to you is that do you have that with anybody? What do you mean? Like that explicit trust to where you can be extremely vulnerable and like a woman? Uh yeah, like like your yeah, yeah, for sure.
SPEAKER_02That I know that I can I'm saying any woman, not no girlfriend, friend, anyone.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I'm trying to think. Relatives, sibling, yeah.
SPEAKER_01I don't know.
SPEAKER_02I don't know. I don't I don't really have a very, very, very strong cause because when I think about what you were talking about earlier, that's a very strong rapport with that person. That's bigger than friend, that's deeper than we just cool. Yeah, I don't think I have that. I feel like the only way I would have that is if it's um possibly like a uh a really, really close family member or somebody I'm dating. Yeah, I I nobody's coming up at the top of my head right now. So uh yeah, and and also to add to the point, um I think I also like I'm a very ambitious person, just like right now, like I'm I'm trying to learn AI and all this stuff. So even if I was a person with 30,000, I still believe in myself enough to I'm I wouldn't be comfortable at 30k. Like just how my brain works, I wouldn't be comfortable at 30k anyway.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_02So like if she's making 500,000, if anything, I want to know how to do that too. Like on my end, even if I do help you, and like we grow this or whatever, but I'm always going to want something for myself just to feel safe like it in my own life, you know. So I I don't because how you worded it, it was like boom, I got 30k and then she got 500. Why would I not double this and make my life better? But to me, how my brain works, I would love to help out or whatever, and we can grow as a couple. And if she's cool enough, you know, she probably is gonna love me just like I love her. So we we both would be straight, but I'm still gonna want to look out for Steve too. So I wouldn't be a I wouldn't be a comfortable 30k guy.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_02I mean, but I would still try to big my shit up too.
SPEAKER_00Right. I mean, for sure. And I agree. Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's probably one of the reasons why she likes you is that she sees the vision in you. Right, right. And sometimes we don't see that in ourselves as well. So like, like you see, like when I'm doing training and stuff like that, it's like you're you know more than what you feel like you do in your head. Yeah, like you're comfortable making decisions. You just gotta now have the terminology and be confident in your yes or no. Um, so I'll see that in them, but they'll be like, I don't know, like I'm out. The floor, it's a little scary. Um, and so I'm sure your your girlfriend, your wife, whatever, is gonna have that same like I I know he he got it, you know, he he can be a dog, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. So I I just look at that situation and it just kinds of I mean, like, I mean, when you know, their woman makes significantly more than them, it doesn't feel right. Yeah, some don't feel right. Yeah, but at the same time, this is this is her business. You want to see her do well, she's willing to pay you more. Um, and it just so some of those are like no-brainer incidents. It's so for it to be like a hard, nah, I ain't doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Seems a little stubbornish, and and that's um where it's like, all right, we we gotta figure out that why a little bit more.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, no, that um, yeah, I think, I think, damn, we had an hour. Damn, but uh, no, I think that uh that that that's what it is. It's it's the power dynamic. And which I I don't I don't ever have a problem with a woman making more.
SPEAKER_00As long as you up there with them.
SPEAKER_02You know, like yeah, or striving to do that, or more, or you know, like both of us could be comfortable. Like I ain't trying to be a part of no girl program. You know, I'm saying I ain't trying to be in I I ain't trying to be a feature in your life. You know what I'm saying? Like that shit don't, I I don't like feeling like that, you know. Like I got my own life too, you know what I'm saying? And usually how things is biblically, it's like, you know, we could both do this together, but like, you know, the the man pursues his purpose and then everything kind of flows from that. Not saying every single relationship can't be like that, but I just I something does not sit well with me being a part of somebody else's story. Like I need my own. So yeah, and I'm so confident in myself, and this shit gonna work one day, otherwise I would have been stopped everything I've been doing. But like I'm so confident in myself, and this shit is going to work one day that I'd love to help other people with their own thing, no matter what heights it is, but I just don't see myself again being a part of um or being being it feels like I'm a character in somebody else's story. Like that, I I I don't like that feeling. Yeah, which I felt that before. Yeah,
Closing Reflections
SPEAKER_02yeah, not a good feeling.
SPEAKER_00Understood. Right. Well, I think we did it, right? Yeah. All right, another good episode. Yeah. Goes by really quickly. Right, what? All right, well, we're two for the culture. We'll be back. We love y'all. We'll be back.