#24 - Jane's Lived Experience

In this heartfelt episode of the School Can't Experience Podcast, host Leisa Reichelt is joined by Jane, a School Can’t parent. 

Jane shares her journey with her son Johnny, who was diagnosed with ADHD and autism, and the struggles they faced within the school system. Despite a series of setbacks, Jane's advocacy led to finding a supportive educational environment where Johnny is now thriving. 

00:00 Welcome to the School Can't Experience Podcast

00:52 Jane's Introduction and Family Background

01:27 Early School Challenges and ADHD Diagnosis

04:35 Struggles with Medication and School Environment

06:55 Transition to Year One and Autism Diagnosis

10:17 Year Two: Escalating Challenges and Seeking Solutions

18:57 Finding the Right School and Transitioning

21:35 Johnny's Progress and Thriving in the New School

27:56 Reflections and Advice for Other Parents

31:44 Closing Remarks and Resources

Recommended Resources

• NeuroWild on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/neurowild_
• NeuroWild on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/NeuroWild-100087870753308/

Transcript

Leisa Reichelt: 0:05

Hello and welcome to the School Can't Experience podcast. I'm Leisa Reichelt, and this podcast is brought to you by the School Can't Australia community. Caring for a young person who's struggling to attend school can be a stressful and isolating experience, but you are not alone. Thousands of parents across Australia and many more around the world face similar challenges and experiences every day. It might be a good idea to have a box of tissues handy today, as we are joined by a School Can't mum, we are calling Jane. Jane has two young boys, one of whom is neurodiverse and has been through a pretty stressful School Can't experience. Through some very active advocacy, Jane was able to secure a more suitable school environment for her son, but not without some pretty difficult experiences along the way. I hope you enjoy Jane's story. Hello Jane and thank you so much for joining us for our podcast today.

Jane: 0:55

Thank you, Leisa, for having me.

Leisa Reichelt: 0:57

We are really interested in hearing the journey that you've been on with your School Can't experience, Jane. So why don't you get us started by just telling us a little bit about yourself, your family, what what context do we need to understand?.

Jane: 1:13

So we live on the northern beaches. I've got two beautiful boys, an 8-year-old and a 6-year-old. We live an active life. and, our eldest has got ADHD, Autism and anxiety.

Leisa Reichelt: 1:26

So if we wanted to start at the beginning of this story, where do you think the beginning is?

Jane: 1:32

Johnny had struggles at preschool, in staying regulated for the full day. I was really lucky. Preschool had a strong understanding of neurodiversity and they used to take him away for his own quiet zones. He used to go and sit with one of the educators, in an afternoon and do puzzles. Just have a bit of downtime really, because he wasn't able to sit during story time, he was disruptive. So that amazing that they had that initiative to do that, and that got us through really preschool that they were doing that proactively. He would sometimes have a rest, so he'd go into the, the more junior room and have rest because that's what he needed to get through the day it was so overwhelming for him. sensory overload, being in preschool with lots of screaming children. And that's where it sort of started. We went to a pediatrician and we sat down and she had Duplo. He sat there so quietly making the most amazing Duplo creation. And we walked out. She thought, I don't think he's got ADHD. If he had ADHD, he couldn't walk in here and, and create that. He's been quiet. He's listening to you. No. So we don't think he has a diagnosis. So we walked away and go, oh, okay, well, all right. He's just a, it's just something that they see at preschool, we need to try to support him around that. And then we went to kindie and first parent teacher, I think I left in tears because he was really struggling. Like he was just very disruptive. He wasn't understanding social cues. He was coming home very dysregulated and it was, the whole experience was incredibly overwhelming for him and us. So that's when we went, okay, we need to get the follow up. So we got a psychologist to do the proper testing, and then he came back with your ADHD hyperactive, um, which wasn't a surprise to be honest by the time you go through that process, all the questionnaires and the reporting. By the end of it, you kind of know that, that that's the way it's gonna,

Leisa Reichelt: 3:32

Was he having trouble going to school like in kindy

Jane: 3:36

No, he didn't and I think, it was just him by himself. His younger brother was at preschool, so it was just the two of us. He got time with me to regulate. We used to ride his bike to school. I used to say to him, this is actually the best part of my day. It was actually great. We live right near the school. How lucky are we? He can ride his bike to school, you know? yeah. So no, no real issues really going to school. Was more than happy to go.

Leisa Reichelt: 4:02

But being there was really difficult for him.

Jane: 4:05

Yeah. And obviously the work, as it gets more demanding as they move into the years, then I think that's where it starts to, the wheels start to come off unfortunately, in the school environment when they cannot sit still anymore and focus and become disruptive, and it's obviously for teachers, they notice it very quickly and they pick up on it and have those conversations with parents proactively now, compared to previous years.

Leisa Reichelt: 4:31

So it was identified that he was ADHD and he's in kindie,

Jane: 4:35

We went back to the pediatrician and said, hi, we have a diagnosis, and straight away she said Ritalin and I just in tears, Like really, this is a strong medication? And she said, well, Ritalin is the most researched medication. it's probably one of the safest medications. So, okay. And we walked down and, yeah, we did trial him on it on a very small dose and then increased it. Quite quickly, his kindie teacher, said that she had noticed a huge difference. He was able to focus, he was able to interact with other kids, which to me was amazing. He wasn't sitting outside from the group as much. so there was a, yeah, it was instant improvement, which was great. as most, people that have put their kids on Ritalin will know the side effects. he starts losing weight, stops eating, and also the afternoons were horrible. And I wasn't given anything to support him in the afternoons, which I went on for too long. With horrible afternoons of complete meltdowns, destructive behavior. My little one was three at the time. It was just really horrible. I wish I was better supported there with, how's he gonna be after school when that Ritalin wears off? Because that was brutal. That was kind of kindergarten for us. Welcome to schooling.

Leisa Reichelt: 5:51

Were you working through this as well, Jane.

Jane: 5:54

Yes, I was. I was working. My company was very understanding and flexible, and I was very honest about what I was going through, which was great to have that support. but still it's a huge mental burden that no one really understands unless you've actually been through it. You don't understand, the strain what you, the constant, like your mind is constantly trying to just make things better and what can I do? What can I do here? Or you know, you just, yeah, it does, consume your mind. And then there's also, with any diagnoses, there's a little bit of embarrassment I suppose, or like you're not quite sure. I'm in a place of acceptance now, which is great. I'm much more open, but that's taken me a good few years to get there. But when he first got that diagnosis, I wasn't, shouting at the roofs telling everybody. I thought, that's his own private information. I don't want anyone to judge me or him because he does have ADHD, I just want him to just be like every other kid. So at the end of kindy, the school asked to meet with us again and they had concerns around him reading social cues and not able to focus in the classroom, being a bit detached from the rest of the class. So when they did group activities, he wasn't really able to participate, and when they did wider activities, he wasn't able to participate. They encouraged us to go and seek an autism diagnosis. So, we went and did that quite quickly because if he was autistic, they wanted to get the funding from the Department of Education so that they could support him rolling into year one.'cause without that funding, they wouldn't be able to get an SLSA to give him that one-on-one support that he needed to learn to read and write. So, we got the autism diagnosis, somewhat devastating to be honest, because I just didn't know what it meant. I didn't really know a lot about autism, the whole thing was so confusing in terms of where does he sit, what's his future like? How does it look? It was just a lot, yeah, I think I took week off work, just to kind of just sit with it and, um, yeah, it was, it was a lot. It was a lot. At least the school could support him because they only know what they know. So going to year one, he had a great SLSA who was able to help him with his reading and writing and he built a connection with her. She was fantastic. He used to talk about her fondly. He had a really good year. he had good friends. He was still riding his bike to school. There was no, I don't wanna go to school. He generally liked school. The school was making some adjustments for him, so he didn't like doing dance. He found that particularly sensory. So there were adjustments that were made there that he could, go along, have a go, Johnny. But if it's too much, you can go and sit in another classroom or at the back. They were starting to understand his profile of being autistic and how that impacted him at school. I had flexibility around if he was at the athletics carnival, I could pick him up and take him home or things like that. So that was great that I started to kind of, I was, I was given that flexibility to support him where needed. And they were the same in the school environment as much as they could.

Leisa Reichelt: 9:04

It does sound as though the school is doing everything right

Jane: 9:08

Absolutely. They were great. They really were. They really were. And I think the connections was the big thing. The teacher was very experienced and she had realistic expectations of him and his learning capacity, which I think is a huge thing

Leisa Reichelt: 9:23

Hmm.

Jane: 9:24

He probably wasn't treated like everybody else, but he still felt like everybody else,

Leisa Reichelt: 9:28

Yeah.

Jane: 9:28

He was building his confidence up with the SLSA and she had experience of neurodiversity and children who were dyslexic. So she's come from a place of deep understanding as well, which I think was really lucky to have someone like that.

Leisa Reichelt: 9:41

And just being able to personalize what his experience was like there to what he needed.

Jane: 9:47

Absolutely. Yeah. I felt very supported in year one and I felt like he was kind of, know, we knew the diagnoses. And he was being medicated and he was supported as best he could. then we had some outside therapies to help as well, like occupational therapy. So I think we were doing everything at that stage to help and support him. as he's growing and developing.

Leisa Reichelt: 10:09

I feel like there is a dramatic plot twist coming soon

Jane: 10:13

Yes, there is

Leisa Reichelt: 10:16

What happens next?

Jane: 10:18

The end of year one. I was, so excited because my littlest was starting kindergarten and Johnny was gonna be in year three. And I was like, no more childcare fees one school drop off, one pickup. This is gonna be awesome.

Leisa Reichelt: 10:32

Mm-hmm.

Jane: 10:33

and it did not go that way at all. He did not cope with the new teacher, the new class. That fear of being at school happened instantly and he pretty much, from day one, he didn't wanna be dropped off and he screamed they took him into a classroom and I could hear him scream Even my little kindie boy could hear his brother screaming from the classroom next door, which is horrible.

Leisa Reichelt: 11:01

That's awful.

Jane: 11:02

He was distraught to go to school and it happened very fast We didn't know what to do. The school didn't know what to do. I think he settled in the first couple of weeks. I think he, he managed to sort of settle after he had this sort of, emotional response to me going, obviously this, you know, a separation anxiety. He kind of did calm down and I think they managed to keep him in school, for the day. But then it just, it just, it ended up him running after me, out the school gates, him screaming, them trying to hold him back. It was quite traumatic. My husband tried to drop him off. Same thing happened. He just looked like a ghost as well. Like he was just, his little face was like fear and terror. When I think about it now, I think, oh, you poor little thing. We didn't know what to say to him. We were just standing there looking at him like he's, he's a weirdo, to be honest. That's what I think about it Now we are looking at him like, you're a weirdo. The teachers didn't really know what to say. We sort of stood there with him waiting for him to kind of go off with the teacher. We were like, come on Johnny, come on. You go for the teacher. Come on mate. And then the teachers would throw in things like, you know, your mummy will get in trouble if you don't go to school It's just like horrible I think now that those things were said to him like, just horrible.

Leisa Reichelt: 12:23

it is such a common story though, right? So many kids are hearing this.

Jane: 12:27

It's not fair to put that on the shoulders of a little kid. I think hindsight's a beautiful thing, but we should not have responded in that way. And I think in some instances when he ran off, the teachers were like, you know, mummy's gotta go to work. I'm busy. Teachers even said, I'm busy. You've gotta go to school. And nothing was working. so, we ended up meeting with the school and then agreed that we could try and drop him at the office. Which wasn't really that great either.'cause I think about it now'cause there's lots of people in the office.

Leisa Reichelt: 12:57

Mm.

Jane: 12:58

Probably the worst place to drop him off. But

Leisa Reichelt: 13:00

Mm.

Jane: 13:00

was what they thought would be good. And then the teacher, the SLSA, would come and meet him, and take him through. That was somewhat fraudulent because we had changes in SLSAs on different days. And that was the change in that was not great. He really was adamant he did not wanna go to the classroom. So they used to just sort of take him up into their learning support room, or they would walk around the veggie patch with him. Or, they took away all of the demands, I suppose. and just tried to get him in to school. but yeah, he sometimes would run off to find me I even had to sit at the office, so I had to sit at the office while he was at school we got to a point where he would go for an hour and I would sit in the office for the full hour. And he, he, he wouldn't really engage much work but we didn't really know at this stage. I just thought at least he's going for an hour every day. It made it somewhat easier for me because at least for his brother, they were both getting dressed and going to school. How do I explain to his brother who's just started kindergarten, that your brother's not going to school?

Leisa Reichelt: 14:08

Yeah.

Jane: 14:09

in some ways its easier that I had, at least he went, even if it was for an hour and came home.

Leisa Reichelt: 14:17

Yeah, and I think there's often, that kind of framing of it as the exposure therapy as well, isn't it? Like if you stop coming, it'll be harder to come back as long as you keep coming, you'll see it's easy and fine, and then you'll be able to do more. It's like, no.

Jane: 14:31

And I did have that advice at one point, like at least just get to go for an hour every day. But I think it

Leisa Reichelt: 14:36

Yeah.

Jane: 14:37

too much in the end.

Leisa Reichelt: 14:38

I had the same with my son. They'd say, get him in whenever you can, And I was like, I'd take him in at lunch for chess club, or they had a therapy dog there once a week and he'd go in and see the therapy dog and then come home. And I'm just like, what is this doing for us?

Jane: 14:52

I know It was somewhat pointless in the end, probably. I think it, gave him a level of distrust in the education system. They were trying to just. send out different SLSAs to see if that would work, send his teacher out to see if that would work.

Leisa Reichelt: 15:07

Hmm.

Jane: 15:07

oh, you don't have to wear your school uniform. We did try lots of different things, but it just didn't, it didn't

Leisa Reichelt: 15:13

Yeah.

Jane: 15:14

and there was one day that, They had, he'd run off a learning support teacher and I could hear him screaming. And I ran in and I sort of grabbed him out and I said, this is not working. This is not working for my child. I'm taking you home. I got in the car with him and he was like, I'm sorry, mummy. said, don't

Leisa Reichelt: 15:29

Hmm.

Jane: 15:30

Don't be sorry at all. this is not the right environment for you. mummy's doing her best to find the right environment for you, but this is not the right environment So do not apologize. There is a school out there for you. I just haven't found it yet. I hadn't found it yet. I was doing lots of research, but I just hadn't found it yet. I didn't want him to feel bad about himself because he couldn't do it.

Leisa Reichelt: 15:53

It's wonderful that you were able to say that to him in that moment.

Jane: 15:56

Yeah. I think, I was just a bit numb throughout the whole I was stressed because I was trying to work I did say to him sometimes, and I feel guilty about it now, but I've gotta go to work, and my mum and dad, his grandparents helped out a lot and picked him up and dropped him off so that I could continue working. I only worked three days a week, but, that was the hardest stress, trying to balance the support I needed to give him, and then trying to maintain a job. Just something had to give eventually. And I ended up quitting my job'cause it was just too much. I couldn't mentally turn up to my job. I was at my job on calls with psychologists, with the school. I was doing school tours,

Leisa Reichelt: 16:38

Hmm.

Jane: 16:38

in my days off and things. So I was really busy and it was just too much and I needed to be so in tune with myself to be able to support him. So, giving up work was the only option.

Leisa Reichelt: 16:53

What was that like for you? Were you a career orientated person? Were you like, well, I've got my kids to school now, I can probably focus a bit more on work.

Jane: 17:01

Yeah. I was realistic when he got a diagnosis, I had become realistic that I couldn't work full time. There was a grieving process there because I was ambitious. I worked in marketing and advertising, And going from a full-time job to a part-time job, the types of jobs you go for are a lot lower. They really are less responsibility. So it felt like a bit of a demotion, but I felt like that was the only option to support my son was to be working part-time so I could look after my own mental health because he does have extra needs. Working part-time was the only option. but yeah, giving up my job was heartbreaking.

Leisa Reichelt: 17:35

You talked about looking after your mental health. Did you have some strategies for that? What were you doing to help look after yourself?

Jane: 17:42

I don't know if I had much time to be honest.

Leisa Reichelt: 17:44

Hmm.

Jane: 17:45

I think I became a bit introverted throughout this whole thing as I was navigating how to help my child. I was, was preoccupied in how to help my child, and I was mentally exhausted by that and I didn't really have a lot of time for, yeah. I was going through something really intense and deep at that time and that was preoccupying my mind. My husband and I kind of, yeah, just, I think we isolated ourself quite a bit when we went through this. I think we were, embarrassed, disheartened. And we didn't really know what to say to other families. Cause it's really hard thing to have a chitchat about at the school pick up, and picking up my, my youngest child and my oldest is with me because he's gone to school for an hour. Luckily people, didn't really say anything in front of him but I kept a distance because it wasn't no one else's business. We were still navigating things. And at that point we did not have a solution for where my son was gonna go to school. That was really hard. So he was still enrolled at this school. Even though he was going for an hour, had no options.

Leisa Reichelt: 18:46

So Jane, you are at home by yourself, trying to work out what the options might look like. What did you go through? what was the next step?

Jane: 18:57

I did lots of tours in really small schools, so I knew, well, I felt that a small environment would be a place that he would thrive. So I looked at some really, like a small public school up the road, and thought that was a promising option. however, once they found out he had run off in the school grounds, they wouldn't accept him. Which was very disheartening they used the word abscond, which broke my heart. and so that was just absolutely devastating'cause that would've been a really great option for us. We looked into a support class, in the public system, but they're in high demand. So we were told to wait and see when a place comes up and if a place comes up it might not be in your area and the recommendation is to take it. So we missed out, at the end of term three of year two for a spot, but we got one in term four. It was an out of area enrollment. So, we went and had a look at the school and instantly I felt that this would be a great solution for my son. There were other kids, just like my son at the school, they were experienced in inclusive education. The class was gonna be a maximum of six kids. So he would get the attention that he needed. Even though it was 45 minutes away, we took the spot and told him about it. I said, I found you a school. I had a brochure with pictures. And, you know, and he got really excited about that. and slowly, we went, had tours. We took him along to the school to meet the teacher and some of the kids, and it was done really nicely and they managed it really well. The, the transition into that school. They did, you know, I did social stories for him as well this is how you're gonna go to school, and they provide transport for him, so this is what transport's gonna look like. Just really making sure we planned this transition really well, because I don't think we did that previously at his old school. The school was great. They did a one pager on meet your teacher and this is what your teacher likes to eat. These are her hobbies. it was great'cause we really had a great sense of who his teacher would be before he's even met her, you know, and it, they just had an understanding of the importance of connection

Leisa Reichelt: 21:20

Yeah.

Jane: 21:21

it made me feel so humbled that there was somewhere he could go, that he would feel safe. Because they've made the effort to make him feel safe.

Leisa Reichelt: 21:30

Let's talk about Johnny's experience at the school and how that's gone for him.

Jane: 21:35

He's been there for two terms at his new school and he's thriving. He has had a 94% attendance rate. He's happy to go to school. He's participating in, anything and everything He's been accepted into PSSA sport, which is great. He's really, really confident now, The classroom is catered to him. They all have their own desks and they're a lot of space. All their learning is very much focussed around their passions. So all these kids have really strong passions and interests, and that is encouraged There is a lot of flexibility and choice with him going to school. He now has a mainstream class, that he's sort of assigned to, and has a buddy in that mainstream class. And if he's feeling overwhelmed that day, he doesn't feel like going into the mainstream class, but he'd like to see his buddy or his friend, then his friend can come down and see him. That just makes me so happy that they're not pushing him, know, to go into that mainstream class. If he's not up for it and it's too much for him, he can still have the connections with the kids in a different way. So,

Leisa Reichelt: 22:51

Yeah.

Jane: 22:52

yeah, they just have much more of an understanding of, the importance of, transitions for these kids. an understanding of change as well. These are all things that I'm understanding on a really deep level now through this experience is the importance of, going through the plan and dealing with change. There's things that we can control and there's things that we can't control, which is something that he's learning about now. We can't control everything every day, but we'll do our best to accommodate you as much as possible. So that's where we're at

Leisa Reichelt: 23:26

It must be incredible to see the difference in him between how he was at the beginning of year two and how he is now.

Jane: 23:33

I think people nearly fall over, when I say he's at school and he's thriving. I'm the proudest mum ever that this has worked out for us. I feel incredibly lucky that this has worked out and Johnny is just thriving. He's happy, he's got friends. He's learning. we're really lucky that this has been the right fit for him they've been able to support him.

Leisa Reichelt: 23:55

I'm not sure how much luck's involved because I think you did quite a lot of work, in making this place become available for him?

Jane: 24:03

I had to advocate and write to local MPs because, he wouldn't get into the local school'cause he absconded. I was like. That's just not fair. where's he gonna go to school? So I think if I hadn't have advocated through Department of Education and the local MP, I don't think this spot would've come available in this support class. We could still be waiting, to be honest. We could still be waiting for a spot. the longer we're out, he's just gonna be completely displaced He actually wanted to go back to school, I think that when we didn't have another school for him to go to,'cause I did say to him that your school is not right for you. once we found a school I was genuinely excited about it. I was able to take him on that journey about how awesome is this? This school's gonna be catered for you. You've only got six kids in your class your classroom's massive and you've got a sensory room. They actually pick you up and drop you off to school like that. That in itself, as much as the travel distance is a bit of a pain. is huge for him. I think The other day I was going to school for a parent teacher and I said, Do you like a lift? No, mummy, I'll just go in the car'cause that's what I'm used to.

Leisa Reichelt: 25:08

Bless. Yeah. But that makes total sense, doesn't it?

Jane: 25:11

Makes total sense

Leisa Reichelt: 25:11

I understand that.

Jane: 25:12

He's teaching me all the time. He really likes routine.

Leisa Reichelt: 25:17

Well, it sounds like he's really learning to advocate for himself which is fantastic.

Jane: 25:20

And he has to remind me sometimes that,

Leisa Reichelt: 25:22

yeah. Yeah. I do wanna linger on your advocacy work because it is a really important message. The system won't be proactive on your behalf in a lot of cases You had to make a lot of noise and kick up a stink. That's something that we need to make sure that parents feel comfortable. I don't know if we ever feel comfortable, but they feel as though kicking up a stink is the thing to do. It's not the wrong thing to do. I, I had been so socialized into just trying to fit into the system and that doesn't do our kids any good.

Jane: 25:57

No, it doesn't. You need to speak up, and call people out.

Leisa Reichelt: 26:01

In some instances it feels as though the support classes have this kind of sense that they are designed to support people back into mainstream rather than offer them the ongoing support that they need for as long as they need it it which could potentially be the whole way through.

Jane: 26:16

Yeah. It's interesting that you say that because, we haven't had conversations with Johnny's school about that yet. I think it's because he's come from such a place of trauma that the expectations for him, particularly for term one when he started in the support class was like the goals were to be happy, relaxed, attend school, you know, attend school for a full day. We had really realistic goals for him. And learning, to be honest, wasn't really one of them, particularly in term one. This is a child who's barely been to school for the whole of year two. So the fact that he goes to school gets a uniform on, is amazing. Like we were celebrating that and I didn't really care about the learning to be honest, because I was just so happy that he was happy and he was going to school and he was meeting new kids and he was playing soccer at lunch and he even went to school camp. He went an overnight camp. Like the fact that he felt that safe in doing that is just astounding. We haven't had any conversations at the moment about him transitioning back into mainstream at all because he's still, it's still stepping stones and the school has said to me, we will do things slowly. Please trust, trust us. We don't wanna rush this, which is lovely to hear. And I do trust them.

Leisa Reichelt: 27:39

That's a lovely feeling, isn't it, to be able to trust the people who are looking after your kids.

Jane: 27:43

Absolutely. His nervous system state is the priority at the moment. and as I said, the learning will come. when he is in a state of calm and he's relaxed, it will come. So,

Leisa Reichelt: 27:56

Jane, I might transition our closing questions if that's ok. If you could go back in time and tell yourself something about this journey, when do you think you would go back to and what would you say?

Jane: 28:07

Um, Keep going. This is a huge learning experience for your family You'll be okay. Like you just need to keep going and do everything in your power to try and find a better way out. There will be a way it might not look like what you think it will look like. But there will, there will be a way and, and through this whole experience, there's a whole piece of like acceptance of this, of this beautiful child and who they are and that things are gonna be done differently. And that's okay.

Leisa Reichelt: 28:41

That's lovely. If you were going to say something to everyone who is listening who is on their own School Can't journey at the moment, what would you like them to hear and know.

Jane: 28:52

I feel for you. Seek out connection as much as possible with families that are going through a similar experience or have neurodiverse children because I have found amazing support now that I have a son in a support class. I have a friend now who has a child very similar to mine. We've both had to give up work and having that friendship of someone who truly understands what you're going through means the world. It makes you feel like you're not alone because I know that you can feel incredibly alone when you're going through something like this, but I promise you, you'll appreciate things so much more. You'll find deep connections with people that you never thought you could because of what you're going through. And you'll grow because of what you're going through a lot. You won't realize how, um, how much you, you grow through this experience and how much you value life and the simple things because of what you're going through'cause it is incredibly traumatic.

Leisa Reichelt: 29:58

Yes. Yeah. You might not be hitting KPIs at work, but you're growing in a completely different and probably more meaningful way in a lot of respects.

Jane: 30:05

Absolutely. This makes you really step back and look at what you need to value in life and what's important.

Leisa Reichelt: 30:13

Hundred percent. Alright, last one. looking for a resource you've come across in your journey that you've really, really found super helpful. What would you recommend.

Jane: 30:25

I love Em from NeuroWild. She is a autistic, ADHD mum with neurodivergent children. She's an artist and she has the most beautiful visuals that explain neurodiversity, how you might be feeling, sensory pieces, regulation. They're just beautiful and they sometimes help me just to check in with how my child might be feeling. The battery might be running down and she has these beautiful visuals of their battery kind of exhausted at the end of the day. They're just a great education piece as well for parents that aren't too heavy.'Cause this, this land can be very heavy and having something that's a bit more lighthearted can be really refreshing.

Leisa Reichelt: 31:10

Yeah, her work is beautiful. On Instagram and Facebook, I think is where I see it mostly. Yeah. Fantastic. Well, Jane, thank you so much for taking us on this journey. I know you've you've shared a lot with us and it's obviously been a really emotional time in your life as well, and I'm sure lots of other people are are going through or have gone through really similar experiences and I appreciate you really being willing to share with us today.

Jane: 31:38

Thank you, Leisa. I really appreciate it. It's lovely to sit down and look back at the experience.

Leisa Reichelt: 31:44

Well, many thanks to Jane for sharing her story, and here's hoping that Johnny continues to go from strength to strength at school. I've put some links to Jane's resource recommendation, which was Em from Neuro Wild in the episode notes, if you wanna go and check out Em's beautiful illustrations, I've also got links to School Can't Australia, where you'll find loads of helpful School Can't resources, information about the parent peer support community, And also a link to donate so you can show your support. If you have found this podcast helpful please do take a moment to share, subscribe, maybe even give us a rating or review. This really does help us get the podcast in front of more people who have School Can't kids, and who have not yet found our community and all the information we can share. If you would like to share your own lived experience with the community, please drop me an email to schoolcantpodcast@gmail.com. It's a very relaxed process and anyone can do it, and I would love to hear from you. If you are a parent or carer in Australia and you're feeling distressed, please remember you can always call the Parent Helpline in your state. A link with the number to call is in the episode notes. Thank you again for listening, and we will talk again soon. Take care.