Bridger of Worlds
The Bridger of Worlds podcast is an in-depth walkthrough between the world of matter and world of spirit. I struggled with porn addiction for close to fifteen years, and all of this led me to discovering some very crucial and beautiful things about not only the physicality of my existence, but the spirituality of it as well. Since then, I‘ve been building bridges that have served me in feeling more whole and well-integrated. I’ve now made it my mission to share with you whatever it is I’ve learned.
Themes, topics and healing modalities such as spiritual embodiment, psychosomatic practices, Shadow Work, Masculine/Feminine energetics, conscious sexuality and archetypal meanings are brought to the forefront in order to raise awareness around what is out of sight because it is only from there that new life can ever emerge.
The greatest paradox of the human condition is to live amongst duality as we seek unity. This is a podcast honoring both and in doing so, creating the loving connections and honest-to-raw conversations we so desire in our lifetimes.
Bridger of Worlds
Exploring the Archetypes: Masculine and Feminine Dynamics in Pornography
In this insightful episode of the Bridger of Worlds Podcast, host Ioannis Kokkinos continues the deep dive into porn addiction recovery, exploring the archetypal dynamics behind pornography. Building on the previous episode, Ioannis unpacks how masculine and feminine energies, sexual trauma, and the need for emotional safety influence compulsive sexual behavior and addiction.
He discusses how performers in porn often represent distorted aspects of the light and dark masculine and feminine, and how these archetypes unconsciously mirror unresolved childhood trauma and unmet needs. Ioannis shares deeply personal insights from his own healing journey, describing his recovery from porn addiction as a modern rite of passage for men.
This episode is essential listening for anyone interested in conscious sexuality, sacred intimacy, addiction healing, and the spiritual dimensions of sex. Ioannis emphasizes the importance of consent, communication, and emotional presence in real relationships—and how pornography often presents a dangerous illusion of these values.
Hi everyone. Welcome to another episode of the Bridger Worlds podcast. I'm your host, Ioannis Kokkinos. Thank you so much for joining me. If you're on YouTube watching, thank you for tuning in and if you're on one of the podcast platforms, thank you for tuning in as a well.
Exploring the Island of Crete
So as you can see, I'm coming at you from a new space.
I've moved for the summer, for the summer season here in Greece. So I'm actually located on the island of Crete, and I couldn't be more excited because this is an island that I did visit about 15, 16 years ago, but it is the biggest island in Greece. And I definitely did not have enough time back then to explore the island as I wanted to. And it feels like this year, this season is going to be a season filled with exploration. So, um, this is why you see a new background. This is my new living space and I do believe that me being here will obviously lend its energy into the upcoming episodes of this podcast. As I mentioned in some previous episodes, it is very important to work with the energy of the land that we visit.
And Crete is very, very potent. It's filled with so much energy and life. And wilderness. So stay tuned for that. Today I will not be talking about Crete or anything like that, but I did want to mention why my space looks different.
Recap of Previous Episode on Porn Addiction
Um, but I do want to bounce off of the previous episode, of course. So last week I talked about a bit of an introduction to porn addiction. I think I touched bits and pieces around, you know, what porn addiction can mean for somebody, what it may look like,
the psychology, the archetypal meanings, I mean. Really surface level stuff. I really did scratch the surface with a few, uh, tidbits here and there. So I want to keep building on this topic, on this subject matter that is considered taboo and is not talked about enough.
Archetypal Meanings in Pornography
So today I really want to talk about the archetypal meanings of what a porn performer could represent, right? So I talked about how our masculine energy identifies with the dominant figure in pornography and our feminine energy identifies with the submissive figure in pornography. So I wanna elaborate on this because I think it is so important to perhaps name a reason why we are so drawn to pornography, why some of us become addicted. Because I did mention that a lot of people watch porn, but it doesn't necessarily mean they become addicted. It really has to do with what is unconscious within ourselves, because when we are dealing with sexuality, when we are dealing with themes of sex and intimacy and connection, we are also looking at our wounds and traumas around love, intimacy, and connecting with another person in this manner.
So safety, of course, takes precedence above all else in intimacy. There could be a reason for such a strong pull toward pornography is the fact that someone may not feel safe in connecting with another in this way. In this manner.
Someone may not feel safe inside their body. Someone may not feel safe with their animal nature. Someone may not feel safe with this inner fire, right? There, an array of reasons why someone may become addicted to pornography. And of course we'll be bringing in and tying in my personal experience.
The Importance of Safety in Intimacy
And so today I think I will be focusing on safety and that connection to the archetypal experience when it comes to the masculine and the feminine. Because the feminine above all else needs to feel safe, right? No matter what gender we identify with, no matter what biological sex we are. Man, woman, non-binary.
We all have a masculine polarity and we all have a feminine polarity within ourselves and the feminine above all else before she can do anything else is to feel safe.
So in heterosexual encounters, right? When men and women come together, man is supposed to take on the masculine symbol, and woman is supposed to take on the feminine symbol. Here, this means that man is meant to establish safety for the feminine to express herself and then the union, the sexual union, the divine union can occur. Now, this can also happen amongst homosexual encounters, right? The feminine, as I talked about in the previous episode, represents this dance represents the connection of two entities coming together.
So sex as a symbol is the feminine because it is the dance, it is the change, it is the shift, it is the movement. And the feminine also brings the two single entities together. That is the nature of feminine energy. And the masculine is meant to provide the safety, the container, and the non-judgment.
Now, this is very much a tantric approach, so
Masculine and Feminine Polarities
Men becoming addicted to porn, and of course women are addicted as well. This is an issue with both men and women, but because I'm a man, I wanna speak to the men and I wanna offer some form of insight and understanding based on what it is I learned in my journey.
If men are not feeling safe for whatever reason, whether they've been abused, sexually assaulted, bullied, um, to name a few, right? Like many things can render us not feeling safe, not having been able to have been nurtured or given attention growing up, uh, feeling a form of denial, a form of rejection, right?
It that will tend to lead towards a feeling of non-safety within ourselves, so men can experience this too. I know as men we are meant to provide the safety when it comes to a sexual encounter, right? Like that's the masculine energy above all else. We are meant to provide that safety. But if we are not feeling safe within ourselves, within our own sexual nature, within our own animal nature, then we cannot provide that safety for the sexual union, for the woman, our partner, our counterpart, to express herself in the way that she needs.
So before even man can get there, right, if there's already a feeling of non-safety from childhood, from boyhood, it can be very easy to fall into the trap of needing to watch porn to make up for that feeling of non-safety.
because in pornography I mentioned that it's the wild expression of human nature that is very much emphasized. Now, I've not talked about this yet, right? I've been talking about the masculine and the feminine, but the masculine and the feminine also have two polarities.
Stay with me here because I don't want to lose you. So in all my previous episodes. I basically mentioned that the feminine is the change, is the fluctuation, is the shifts of life. And the masculine is he who provides safety. He who holds non-judgment, he who holds space.
Light and Dark Expressions
Now, if we split the feminine into two threads, we get light feminine and we get dark feminine. Dark here does not mean shadow. Dark is synonymous with wild. If we take the masculine polarity, we get two threads. We get the light masculine, and we get the dark masculine a.k.a, the wild masculine. Again, this does not mean shadow, it means wild.
So when we are watching pornography, all we are witnessing is the wild feminine, the dark feminine, and the wild masculine, the dark masculine. Dark here does not mean bad. Dark means unconscious. It means the unseen. But what did I say in the earlier episodes, where the unconscious resides also lies consciousness, light. We need the dark. We need the wild to get to the light. So when the masculine is establishing safety, is establishing the container is, um, providing non-judgment.
This is actually the light masculine we're talking about. The wild or dark masculine is the is that primal lover that we witness in pornography. Because once the safety is established, the wild can then come through, the wild can be expressed, and this goes for the feminine and the masculine.
That's the light masculine. The light masculine is the witness, is the non-judgment. Once that is established, the wild masculine can come through and the wild feminine can come through.
Now, the difference between the dark and light feminine. For me, the best example to remember the difference here is the myth of Persephone. So I did talk about Pluto and Persephone in my Spring Equinox episode. If you go back to March 20th. I would touch base with that episode 'cause I really go into depth around the symbolism, around the masculine and feminine there.
So basically the myth of Persephone signifies she descends for winter and autumn six months out of the year, and she ascends for spring and summer six months out of the year. So we can basically equate that to Persephone being the dark feminine throughout autumn and winter, and the light feminine through spring and summer. When the feminine is low, when the feminine basically goes underground, goes in the dark, goes in the gestation phase. That is the dark feminine. When the feminine rises to the surface, which also symbolizes elevated emotion, elevated energy, elevated life force. This is the light feminine.
We can very well see the differences between winter and summer. Right? Summer is the culmination, light feminine, and winter is the depreciation, the dark feminine.
So darkness is the wild, is the animal nature because our animal nature is our unconscious nature. So if all of these dynamics within ourselves are not working in synergy or not harmonizing, right? This can lead to an array of complications within our livelihoods.
And this doesn't only speak to intimacy because feminine energy is also related to money, is also related to safety, is also related to how we connect to friends, to family, to partners, to lovers.
The masculine. The non-judgment, which is the light masculine. He who establishes safety, but also witnesses, right?
And the witness is something we need to actually spiritually awaken to. When we spiritually awaken, we've actually encountered, we've experienced our light masculine. Now the dark masculine or the wild masculine is the masculine that actually needs to take care of our day to day mundane reality. So we think of words like providing, defending, protecting, aiming, shooting forward, um, directing, managing.
This is all a part of the dark masculine domain because the masculine is to move forward, is penetrating, right? It's the penetrating force from the energetic perspective. So we can say that basically the light masculine provides the space. And then the dark masculine is able to move forward. So obviously this is very much emphasized in sexual encounters because the wild masculine, is all about penetrating, piercing and breaking through, going through, and the feminine is about receiving that, is about embracing that. It is about surrendering to that.
Shadow Work and Pornography
So all of these archetypes, all of these symbols can very much show up when we are watching pornography. If our feminine doesn't feel safe, if our masculine is, let's say, feeling incapacitated or is wounded or is fractured, somebody will probably want to watch hardcore porn because of the overly dominant, the overly empowered masculine figure that is portrayed on screen. For someone who does not feel safe, whether man or woman who want to experience safety, right, because the feminine very much wants to express herself. The feminine wants to transcend the feminine wants to be liberated. The feminines worst nightmare is to be caged in, right? The feminine is all about transcendence. When we think of the Kundalini serpent, rising Shakti, the feminine sexual force, it's meant to be liberated.
It's meant to ascend, but that ascension can only occur with the safety of the masculine. So if we are very suppressed emotionally? If we are very denied, if we feel like we've not been able to express ourselves growing up as children, as teenagers, even as adults. We'll want to witness the feminine literally being liberated and transcended right, which can very much be an image we witness in pornography, right? And obviously we don't know what's going on behind the scenes. We don't know if there's consent or not, but the illusion is there. Whatever the sparkles and the glitter and the sprinkles of pornography depict, it depicts women that are being very much stimulated and activated, which symbolizes transcendence but we rarely experience light feminine and light masculine in pornography, right? We are only experiencing the wild. We're only experiencing, and I won't even say dark. I'm actually going to say shadow masculine and shadow feminine, because the truth is, the reality of pornography is these people don't know each other.
There's barely any communication, probably there's no consent, probably There's no safety established, right? Like we have absolutely no idea what's going on behind the scenes. All we see is like the perfect shot and the perfect angles, so we don't get to experience any of the light feminine and the light masculine.
Sure. All sorts of acting is involved. We may very well see that the women are experiencing a lot of pleasure, but at the end of the day, these are actors, these are performers. So yes, in reality and in truth, men and women can experience full blown like liberation in intimate encounters.
But that needs to happen with the safety, with the communication, with the consent, with the intimacy, with the connection, right? So we don't get to experience any of that in pornography.
So for men who don't feel, let's say safe, first and foremost, because they're not out in the world trying to meet partners, they're not trying to be connecting with real life human beings, right? They're behind a screen. This feels very safe because they're isolated in all their feelings and all their pain and all their shadow.
So. It can be very much an indication that somebody is not feeling safe. To be intimate, to want to have that sort of connection with another, if they are being so enticed by pornography, there can be the aspect of the masculine needing to feel overpowering, which I talked about in the previous episode, right?
If a man's masculine is feeling fractured or wounded or flacid, symbolically speaking, he'll want to experience a very dominating, a very empowered and strong masculine figure in pornography. If someone is very denied, emotion and feeling wise, the porn acting is filled with all sorts of feeling and emotion, right?
It all seems extremely pleasureful and arousing and stimulating. So there's an emphasis on like life force and energy being raised here, but that's actually bullshit. It's not actually happening because they are performing, they are acting. But for someone who is very vulnerable, who is wounded, who doesn't know any better, who thinks that this is, you know, real life sex ed and is feeling very suppressed, emotionally speaking, will want to witness this as part of offering some form of antidote to what is alive in them, right? Like to counteract for whatever is alive in them.
And guess what?
Personal Reflections and Experiences
These were all my reasons of watching pornography, right? So. I didn't feel safe. I wanted to feel like an empowered, strong, masculine man.
I wasn't dealing with my emotions. I wasn't dealing with my grief. I wasn't dealing with my anger, and I didn't know, understand my wild nature. There was no rite of passage to initiate me into this part of myself, which basically represents boy becoming man, but porn in itself, porn addiction, overcoming porn addiction and learning what it is I've learned was the rite of passage in itself.
So I cannot regret anything that I've experienced. it hasn't been easy, but I am here wanting to help as much as I can, I am here teaching now what it is I've learned. So I have to believe that it was so much bigger than me and that it happened for other reasons that I could not have understood or known back then.
Conclusion and Call to Action
So I think I'll leave it here for today. I think that's definitely enough food for thought. Uh, there's definitely more to say. There's more coming as far as porn addiction is concerned and recovery and all sorts of, um, useful information. Again, this is not easy for me. It's not easy to talk about, but it is so time because I was carrying this in secret for a very, very long time, and I have learned on my healing journey that it is by just being honest and open about where we are, what we've been through, and what it is we've learned is really the best, is the most authentic expression of connection and intimacy. So, um, I wouldn't have it any other way.
So if you're on YouTube watching, please hit that like subscribe button. I so appreciate that. Share the content if you so feel called if you feel like somebody needs to hear this or watch this if you're on one of the podcast platforms. Thank you for tuning in. Please share the episode if you feel like somebody needs to hear this.
I will be back next week, of course, with a brand new episode. If you want to hit me up on my socials, I'm on Threads, I'm on Instagram, I'm on Facebook, and I'm on TikTok. You can find those down below if you're on YouTube.
Please connect with me if you want to elaborate on something. If you have a question, please leave a comment. Let's get some conversations going because I think it's really the only way to heal and move forward is by shedding a light on the things we thought that we needed to hide out of shame, guilt, fear, et cetera.
Okay? So as always, please remember that you are the medicine, and I am just the messenger. Take care.