Fostering Futures℠
The California Association of Health and Education Linked Professions is excited to introduce you to Fostering Futures℠ a podcast that brings you high-quality, research-based content designed to inspire and educate. Each episode is crafted with care, drawing on the knowledge of credible experts, parents, and community members to ensure both trustworthiness and depth.
Our mission is to engage and expand our audience by delivering thought-provoking material that focuses on key areas crucial to the development and well-being of all youth. Through our discussions, we aim to provide insights that are not only relevant but also transformative.
Join us as we explore innovative approaches in special education, Social Emotional Well-Being, and Community. Be ready to be apart of a community committed to making a positive impact.
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Fostering Futures℠
Foster Youth Series EP 3 - From Grief to Grace: A Foster Parent’s Calling
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In this episode, Athena Cordero sits down with Maria Bamba, a foster parent whose journey began through a family crisis and evolved into a lifelong calling. What started as stepping in to care for her nieces during an emergency became a five‑year journey of fostering teen girls, navigating trauma, building structure, and creating a home rooted in faith, love, and accountability.
Maria shares the deeply personal story that led her to fostering from her sister’s medical emergency, to becoming a single foster parent, to later walking through profound grief after the loss of her son. Rather than turning away, Maria leaned into service, using her pain to fuel purpose. Through county resources, counseling, education support, and unwavering commitment, she helped her girls heal, thrive academically, and envision futures they once couldn’t see.
The conversation explores what foster youth truly need to succeed: consistency, expectations, compassion, structure, and someone who refuses to give up on them. Maria also shares her long‑term vision building a ranch‑style foster environment with animals, gardens, and emotional‑support systems and how healing can flow both ways between caregiver and child.
This episode is a powerful reminder that fostering isn’t just about providing shelter, it’s about restoring dignity, building identity, and believing in potential.
Highlights
- The difference between foster care and kinship placement.
- How Maria became a foster parent during COVID while working full‑time.
- Supporting teens through trauma, grief, and academic challenges.
- County resources: counseling, tutoring, social workers, and parent support.
- How faith, structure, and communication anchor Maria’s home.
- Why teens in foster care need more structure, not less.
- The healing relationship between caregiver and child.
- Animals as emotional support and responsibility‑building tools.
- Maria’s vision for a ranch‑based foster care model.
- Why foster parents need ongoing peer support beyond training classes.
Key Takeaways
- Trauma doesn’t define a child; environment and belief do.
- Teens in foster care are at a pivotal crossroads and need stability now.
- Structure, accountability, and love can coexist.
- Healing is mutual. Foster children often help caregivers heal, too.
- Foster parents need real‑world mentorship, not just certification classes.
- Long‑term vision and consistency change outcomes.
- Foster care is not charity, it’s legacy work.
Thanks for listening! Follow us on Facebook and Instagram | www.cahelp.org | podcast@cahelp.org
00:00:09 Intro
The relentless pursuit of whatever works in the life of a child.
00:00:18 Athena Cordero
Welcome to Fostering Futures with CAHELP, a podcast dedicated to our relentless pursuit of whatever works in the life of a child.
00:00:26 Athena Cordero
I'm your host, Athena Cordero, inviting you to join me and countless others as we share our unique perspectives and expertise in the world of special education, behavioral health, social-emotional well-being, and community.
00:00:39 Athena Cordero
Follow us on Buzzsprout, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts.
00:00:44 Athena Cordero
Welcome to Fostering Futures.
00:00:46 Athena Cordero
I'm Athena, and today I'm talking to Maria Bamba.
00:00:51 Athena Cordero
And we're going to talk about being a foster parent.
00:00:55 Athena Cordero
that process, the heart you have to have for that kind of dedication and some interesting things that you want to do in the future as a foster parent.
00:01:05 Athena Cordero
But before we get into that, can you please just tell us a little bit more about who you are?
00:01:12 Maria Bamba
Okay, good morning.
00:01:12 Athena Cordero
Good morning.
00:01:14 Maria Bamba
My name is Maria Bamba and I am a foster parent and I have been also kinship.
00:01:22 Maria Bamba
So I have been a foster parent for the last five years.
00:01:25 Athena Cordero
Okay, so right off, and I want you to know, Maria, I'm very curious about this.
00:01:29 Athena Cordero
I've never been a foster parent, so I have a lot I'm trying to learn.
00:01:33 Athena Cordero
When you say a foster parent and kinship, what's the difference?
00:01:36 Athena Cordero
Can you tell us?
00:01:37 Maria Bamba
Yes, so kinship is when you're related to the child.
00:01:41 Athena Cordero
Okay, perfect.
00:01:42 Maria Bamba
But in my case, the children, they did not know me.
00:01:46 Athena Cordero
So it's kind of related, but they didn't know who you were.
00:01:49 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:01:50 Maria Bamba
Right, so I kind of
00:01:52 Maria Bamba
lean more towards fostering because it's actually, kinships when you really know the child.
00:01:56 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:01:57 Maria Bamba
But there's a blood relation.
00:01:58 Athena Cordero
Gotcha.
00:01:59 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:01:59 Athena Cordero
Thank you.
00:02:00 Maria Bamba
You're welcome.
00:02:01 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:02:01 Athena Cordero
So in your experience then as a foster parent and then also with the kinship connection, can you tell me how that, how your experience as a foster parent even came about?
00:02:14 Athena Cordero
Like when did that start for you?
00:02:16 Maria Bamba
Oh, that's a very interesting story.
00:02:18 Athena Cordero
I'm ready.
00:02:19 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:02:19 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:02:20 Maria Bamba
So about five years ago, my sister had a brain aneurysm.
00:02:26 Maria Bamba
And she was estranged, actually.
00:02:30 Maria Bamba
And she had two girls.
00:02:32 Maria Bamba
And so she was paralyzed on one whole side of her body.
00:02:36 Maria Bamba
So my first inclination was, I need to get those kids.
00:02:43 Maria Bamba
I didn't want them to go to foster care.
00:02:46 Maria Bamba
And so
00:02:48 Maria Bamba
I started to have a really good relationship with the father.
00:02:51 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:02:52 Maria Bamba
So that I could see them.
00:02:53 Maria Bamba
And we just happened to be going through COVID at the time.
00:02:57 Athena Cordero
Oh, right.
00:02:57 Athena Cordero
Five years ago.
00:02:57 Maria Bamba
Five years ago.
00:02:58 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:02:58 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:02:59 Maria Bamba
And I started to...
00:03:03 Maria Bamba
see the children more often.
00:03:05 Maria Bamba
And so when we went into COVID, I offered to take the girls so that I had a home, internet, and I was a school district employee.
00:03:14 Maria Bamba
So I was able to keep an eye on the kids a lot.
00:03:17 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:03:17 Maria Bamba
Better to help the father.
00:03:18 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:03:19 Maria Bamba
But it turned out to be something even worse, actually.
00:03:24 Maria Bamba
So the girls ended up going into foster care.
00:03:29 Maria Bamba
because of a situation they had in their home.
00:03:32 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:03:32 Maria Bamba
And so I didn't want them to go anywhere else.
00:03:35 Maria Bamba
So I said, what do I need to do to become a foster parent?
00:03:38 Athena Cordero
Yeah, and how old were they at the time?
00:03:41 Maria Bamba
11 and 13.
00:03:44 Athena Cordero
So like middle school age?
00:03:45 Maria Bamba
Middle school age.
00:03:46 Athena Cordero
Yeah, which is already an interesting time of life.
00:03:50 Maria Bamba
Oh, absolutely.
00:03:50 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:03:51 Maria Bamba
Adolescence.
00:03:52 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:03:53 Athena Cordero
Okay, so
00:03:54 Athena Cordero
You decided I want to do this and now you're starting from scratch, right?
00:03:57 Athena Cordero
Like what's the process?
00:03:58 Athena Cordero
So what was that like?
00:04:00 Maria Bamba
The process was juggling A full-time career and wanting to be a foster parent at the same time on my own.
00:04:06 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:04:06 Maria Bamba
So being a single parent, it was a challenge, but I had motivation, you know?
00:04:12 Maria Bamba
And the more that I got into it, the classes and how to become a foster parent and the resources and being informed, I realized it wasn't as hard as I thought.
00:04:22 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:04:24 Maria Bamba
For one, I'm a very family-oriented person, so taking in kids is like feeding another mouthful is not a big deal.
00:04:31 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:04:32 Maria Bamba
And I come from a big family, so it was just real easy.
00:04:37 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:04:38 Maria Bamba
It's not as hard as what people think.
00:04:40 Athena Cordero
So, well, you say that,
00:04:42 Athena Cordero
And not everyone comes from that initial place of big family, keep the family, together.
00:04:50 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:04:51 Athena Cordero
The values you.
00:04:53 Athena Cordero
not everyone comes from that in the beginning that has to sit with people sometimes.
00:04:58 Athena Cordero
Right.
00:04:59 Athena Cordero
So, I mean, that says a lot about who you are and your heart to want to even think about it like that from jump, right?
00:05:04 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:05:05 Athena Cordero
And so I respect that.
00:05:07 Maria Bamba
Thank you.
00:05:08 Athena Cordero
Okay, so
00:05:09 Athena Cordero
You go through this process, you take the classes, and then you get, what is it, like certified?
00:05:14 Athena Cordero
You get a license?
00:05:14 Athena Cordero
How does that work?
00:05:15 Maria Bamba
You get your certificate for each of the classes that you complete, and there's a minimal amount of hours that you have to take in order to get your certification.
00:05:26 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:05:26 Maria Bamba
And you also have to do first aid.
00:05:29 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:05:30 Maria Bamba
And so you have to be CPR first aid certified as well.
00:05:34 Maria Bamba
And so I got that as well.
00:05:36 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:05:37 Maria Bamba
And
00:05:38 Maria Bamba
And then I took the girls and had them in counseling.
00:05:45 Maria Bamba
Like I said, I used all the resources that the county offered.
00:05:49 Maria Bamba
And so it has helped me tremendously with them.
00:05:53 Athena Cordero
Can you give me an idea of what resources the county offers or that you became, you know, aware of at the time?
00:06:01 Athena Cordero
The counseling, of course, and then what else maybe did they have?
00:06:04 Maria Bamba
Grief.
00:06:05 Maria Bamba
So not only
00:06:07 Maria Bamba
The county actually and and I was never really aware before and it's not really Publicized as you would think it is.
00:06:14 Maria Bamba
Yeah I mean only if you were going to become a foster parent and getting into something like that Would you realize that they actually had those kind of resources, but the resources the kids first of all come from trauma, okay, and so
00:06:30 Maria Bamba
Trauma has to be treated, right?
00:06:33 Maria Bamba
I mean, it takes a lot of patience, but I'm not a counselor.
00:06:37 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:06:38 Maria Bamba
And I'm not a psychiatrist.
00:06:39 Maria Bamba
So I use the resources for the children to start getting and helping them heal and taking those kind of, well, they came and saw the children actually.
00:06:51 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:06:51 Maria Bamba
But those kind of, they can either go to the school or they can come to your home.
00:06:55 Athena Cordero
And how'd the girls take to that?
00:07:00 Maria Bamba
I think at first they were very, very timid.
00:07:04 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:07:04 Athena Cordero
And I mean, that makes sense.
00:07:05 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:07:06 Maria Bamba
Trauma is a thing and getting and just informing them that it's okay to talk to them.
00:07:12 Athena Cordero
And you did that for them before they started?
00:07:15 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:07:15 Athena Cordero
Oh, that's awesome.
00:07:16 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:07:16 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:07:17 Maria Bamba
You have to kind of encourage them.
00:07:18 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:07:19 Maria Bamba
You know, they're scared.
00:07:20 Athena Cordero
Yeah, of course.
00:07:20 Maria Bamba
You know, and it's a new environment.
00:07:23 Maria Bamba
They weren't very friendly in the beginning and people made them nervous.
00:07:28 Maria Bamba
So that took a while.
00:07:31 Maria Bamba
But like I said, the counseling helped.
00:07:34 Maria Bamba
One of them was struggling in school.
00:07:36 Maria Bamba
So we used the resources through the county for them to have tutoring as well.
00:07:41 Athena Cordero
Good.
00:07:41 Maria Bamba
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
00:07:42 Athena Cordero
That's really good.
00:07:44 Maria Bamba
And there was also a support group for the parents.
00:07:50 Maria Bamba
So when the child was receiving services for counseling, they also offer for
00:07:58 Maria Bamba
you as the parent to have services also, how are you doing, checking up on you.
00:08:03 Maria Bamba
And it was actually, it's been a very good support group, so it helped me a lot.
00:08:07 Athena Cordero
That's awesome.
00:08:08 Maria Bamba
Oh yeah.
00:08:09 Athena Cordero
I mean, and it does make sense for both parent and child or children to receive the support.
00:08:15 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:08:16 Athena Cordero
Yeah, I can see how that will go a long way.
00:08:18 Athena Cordero
Okay, so counseling, tutoring, support for the parent, any other resource you remember?
00:08:25 Maria Bamba
The social workers.
00:08:26 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:08:27 Maria Bamba
The social workers are a great source of support.
00:08:31 Maria Bamba
Granted that they have a big caseload and they are really busy, but I encourage people not to get too discouraged because they will and what they are capable of doing and helping you is great.
00:08:42 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:08:43 Maria Bamba
You know, but you have to, you have to let them know what you need.
00:08:46 Athena Cordero
Right.
00:08:47 Maria Bamba
You know, you have-?
00:08:47 Athena Cordero
Which is not always easy for folks to say what they need or even talk about,
00:08:53 Athena Cordero
what difficult thing they might be going through.
00:08:56 Athena Cordero
That takes a lot too.
00:08:57 Maria Bamba
Oh yes, of course it is.
00:09:00 Maria Bamba
Faith has also been a big part of the children.
00:09:03 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:09:05 Maria Bamba
My kids, my girls, actually, I have three of them.
00:09:09 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:09:10 Maria Bamba
So my girls are, they know how to do the rosary.
00:09:14 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:09:15 Maria Bamba
And church is a thing.
00:09:17 Maria Bamba
So
00:09:19 Maria Bamba
It's just me and the girls.
00:09:21 Maria Bamba
And I ended up, because of this experience, I left my career actually and decided to do this full-time.
00:09:31 Maria Bamba
So I ended up opening up a business and my goal, ultimate goal is to have a group home.
00:09:40 Athena Cordero
Wow, okay, so let me just, I'll try to take it in.
00:09:44 Athena Cordero
Okay, so you've got your two,
00:09:47 Athena Cordero
nieces, right?
00:09:48 Athena Cordero
Okay, 11 and 13 at the time.
00:09:51 Maria Bamba
At the time.
00:09:52 Athena Cordero
You take advantage of these awesome resources through the county.
00:09:55 Athena Cordero
And then so how long, how long are you?
00:09:58 Athena Cordero
Are they?
00:09:59 Athena Cordero
Were they?
00:09:59 Athena Cordero
Are they still with you?
00:10:00 Maria Bamba
Yes, absolutely.
00:10:01 Maria Bamba
And they're straight A students.
00:10:03 Athena Cordero
Oh my gosh, that's a high five.
00:10:05 Athena Cordero
High five to both of them.
00:10:06 Athena Cordero
And to you?
00:10:08 Maria Bamba
And I also have a foster.
00:10:09 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:10:10 Maria Bamba
A foster daughter.
00:10:11 Athena Cordero
Okay, so that's how you have the three.
00:10:12 Athena Cordero
Sorry, I have three, yes.
00:10:13 Athena Cordero
Okay, so your two nieces and then a foster daughter.
00:10:16 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:10:17 Athena Cordero
And how old is foster daughter?
00:10:18 Maria Bamba
She just turned 16.
00:10:20 Athena Cordero
Okay, so you've got teenagers.
00:10:22 Maria Bamba
Oh, yeah.
00:10:22 Athena Cordero
All teenagers right now, all girls.
00:10:24 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:10:26 Maria Bamba
I know, right there.
00:10:28 Maria Bamba
Yeah, it is.
00:10:29 Maria Bamba
It has been, but I have to tell you that it's been a rewarding experience.
00:10:36 Athena Cordero
Tell me a little bit about that.
00:10:37 Maria Bamba
So I decided to take this full time and go bigger, you know, take on more girls because I can, I tested the water and
00:10:48 Maria Bamba
The older ones helped me with the younger ones.
00:10:51 Maria Bamba
So it wasn't the transition and taking on new girls.
00:10:55 Maria Bamba
And besides the fact that we talk about everything, right?
00:10:59 Maria Bamba
my girls and I, we have discussions.
00:11:02 Maria Bamba
What do you think?
00:11:03 Maria Bamba
You know, I've learned a lot actually from them, just listening to them.
00:11:06 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:11:07 Maria Bamba
And their experiences.
00:11:08 Maria Bamba
So my 16 year old, I have had her for almost six months.
00:11:12 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:11:13 Maria Bamba
And it looks like with her situation, I will have her for another six months.
00:11:18 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:11:19 Maria Bamba
But initially, the reason that I wanted to do this full time was I had a tragedy.
00:11:28 Maria Bamba
a few years ago.
00:11:29 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:11:30 Maria Bamba
My son passed away.
00:11:32 Athena Cordero
Oh, I'm so sorry.
00:11:33 Maria Bamba
And so before he had passed away, though, on my free time from my full-time career, I have a whiteboard inside my closet.
00:11:42 Maria Bamba
And I threw out an idea that I wanted to do a non-profit organization for foster kids that benefited their needs, the ones that the county doesn't take care of.
00:11:52 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:11:53 Maria Bamba
You know, you really don't know the needs of the child until you really have them.
00:11:57 Maria Bamba
So you get the resources that you do get, but there are other needs as well.
00:12:01 Athena Cordero
Of course.
00:12:01 Maria Bamba
And raising teenagers is expensive.
00:12:04 Athena Cordero
I was going to say, even just someone with their own teenagers that they've raised from birth, they were looking for resources.
00:12:10 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:12:10 Maria Bamba
Yeah, absolutely.
00:12:11 Maria Bamba
And
00:12:13 Maria Bamba
So when my son passed away, I was in grief and I decided that it made me relook at things, you know, maybe I need to take a step back.
00:12:28 Maria Bamba
And I started focusing, like I said, I had this idea on a whiteboard and it said,
00:12:34 Maria Bamba
Angels in the Outfield, Foster.
00:12:35 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:12:37 Athena Cordero
That's how you wrote it up there initially.
00:12:38 Maria Bamba
It was, yeah, that's what I wanted the name to be.
00:12:41 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:12:41 Maria Bamba
I loved the movie.
00:12:43 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:12:43 Maria Bamba
Do you remember that?
00:12:44 Maria Bamba
I do remember writing Foster, right?
00:12:46 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:12:46 Maria Bamba
And I had looked it up one day and I found out that it was, there was an Angels in the Outfield, but it was really towards the homeless.
00:12:55 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:12:55 Maria Bamba
So there wasn't one that was dedicated to Foster.
00:12:58 Maria Bamba
And I thought, oh, that's me.
00:12:59 Athena Cordero
There you go, yeah.
00:13:00 Maria Bamba
There you go.
00:13:01 Maria Bamba
So I took that as a sign from God that maybe that's the one.
00:13:04 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:13:05 Maria Bamba
And then I jotted down and did my research of how I would go about it and how I would obtain and make a ranch and grow our own vegetables.
00:13:17 Maria Bamba
And the children are
00:13:19 Maria Bamba
Emotional support animals are very important to these kids.
00:13:22 Maria Bamba
Having something like that where they have something that they get to take care of and they get to love unconditionally and loves them back is such a great tool.
00:13:32 Athena Cordero
You know, I, in what I get to do here with CAHELP, I've had a conversation with someone about, I think it's called, I know I'm gonna say this wrong, but it was equestrian therapy or something like that, where the therapy actually is super helpful.
00:13:48 Athena Cordero
Like never underestimate
00:13:49 Athena Cordero
estimate the benefit of what animals can do as a support.
00:13:54 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:13:55 Athena Cordero
And the way she described it, I hadn't, I had never heard of anything, quite the way she was describing it, but I agree.
00:14:02 Athena Cordero
And so I can see how a ranch style space would be very helpful, especially with kids coming from trauma.
00:14:10 Maria Bamba
Keeping them busy, focusing on what their future's gonna be.
00:14:14 Maria Bamba
And I tell my girls,
00:14:17 Maria Bamba
You go to school and you pretend like you're a horse with blinders on, okay?
00:14:21 Maria Bamba
And you go to school and that's the one goal.
00:14:23 Maria Bamba
Everything on the outside is not what your goal is.
00:14:27 Athena Cordero
Right.
00:14:27 Maria Bamba
And I emphasize them having to work on themselves.
00:14:32 Maria Bamba
Healing was a thing.
00:14:33 Maria Bamba
But in my case, opening up the business and trying to take that forward has been an inspiration because my son was a baseball player.
00:14:43 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:14:44 Maria Bamba
And so it kind of, I needed to push it in gear.
00:14:47 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:14:48 Maria Bamba
As soon as I was, and in a really weird kind of way, the girls are healing me too.
00:14:56 Athena Cordero
Good.
00:14:56 Maria Bamba
So it worked out to where I needed them just as much as they needed.
00:15:00 Athena Cordero
As they needed you.
00:15:00 Athena Cordero
That's beautiful.
00:15:01 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:15:02 Athena Cordero
Do they know that?
00:15:03 Athena Cordero
Do they?
00:15:03 Maria Bamba
They do.
00:15:04 Maria Bamba
And you wanna know what the nice thing is, is most of these kids, you realize that the teenagers are the most,
00:15:13 Maria Bamba
important because from here, they go on to their own lives.
00:15:17 Maria Bamba
And so however you mold them or however you're going to build them, now's that time.
00:15:23 Maria Bamba
And so like the girl that I have now, she has mentioned to me that she's never had structure like that ever, or that someone ever cared that much about her academics.
00:15:35 Maria Bamba
So she is struggling in math.
00:15:38 Maria Bamba
Actually, I'm getting her a tutor.
00:15:40 Maria Bamba
We're in the process.
00:15:41 Maria Bamba
But
00:15:43 Maria Bamba
And I told her that all these, and I encouraged them to play sports as well.
00:15:47 Maria Bamba
Extracurricular activities are great, just so long as they're maintaining their grades.
00:15:50 Athena Cordero
Yes.
00:15:51 Maria Bamba
You know, and so I'm strict, but I'm very loving.
00:15:55 Maria Bamba
You know, my girls don't go anywhere by themselves.
00:16:00 Maria Bamba
Our household, they're mostly homebodies, but that's a good thing.
00:16:05 Maria Bamba
I'd rather them be nerds.
00:16:08 Maria Bamba
and worrying about studies and anything else because their future, they're gonna need it.
00:16:13 Athena Cordero
Yeah, no, definitely.
00:16:14 Athena Cordero
And you say strict, and I grew up with a strict mom, but as you get older, and especially for kids who don't have that and then they receive it, they actually want it.
00:16:27 Athena Cordero
And it isn't, to me, it wasn't so much strict as it was
00:16:31 Athena Cordero
Discipline with love, just really teaching them and then showing them how that's a loving thing rather than not giving them, giving them that structure.
00:16:42 Athena Cordero
So it's to me just awesome that someone 16 can see how it benefits and then see how not having it, you know, the contrast.
00:16:53 Athena Cordero
and enjoying it, actually, because it sounds like it's working for her really well.
00:16:57 Maria Bamba
It is.
00:16:58 Maria Bamba
And like I said, I've been blessed to have girls that they want to be something.
00:17:06 Maria Bamba
They've come from trauma and where they had to struggle in their life and giving them a different perspective on what life could be for them is like the biggest.
00:17:19 Maria Bamba
motivation ever.
00:17:20 Athena Cordero
It's like a different picture, right?
00:17:22 Athena Cordero
Oh, absolutely.
00:17:22 Athena Cordero
A different ending or a different next step or, you know, whatever they see.
00:17:26 Athena Cordero
Can you, because now I'm just so curious about them.
00:17:29 Athena Cordero
So I won't ask, I won't get too deep into it, but if you could share one thing about each of them, maybe something unique or that stands out to you about each of them that we could just get an idea of who they are.
00:17:43 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:17:44 Maria Bamba
My oldest, she is not very,
00:17:49 Maria Bamba
She's academically very smart.
00:17:51 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:17:53 Maria Bamba
But socially, she doesn't really like people so much.
00:17:56 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:17:57 Maria Bamba
But she knows that sometimes she has to come out of her little shell and she'll do that.
00:18:02 Maria Bamba
And then the next thing you know, she's waiting for the time when it's over.
00:18:06 Athena Cordero
Right, But she'll do it.
00:18:07 Athena Cordero
I can identify with that a little.
00:18:09 Maria Bamba
Yeah, well, and we all kind of are like that too.
00:18:12 Athena Cordero
I can see that a little by myself.
00:18:14 Athena Cordero
So I get it.
00:18:14 Athena Cordero
But she does push and do those things.
00:18:18 Athena Cordero
And then, I mean, she's ready to go back, but she will push herself to do it.
00:18:21 Athena Cordero
Right.
00:18:22 Athena Cordero
That's all you can ask for.
00:18:24 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:18:24 Maria Bamba
That's growth.
00:18:25 Maria Bamba
That's actually great for her.
00:18:26 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:18:27 Maria Bamba
And it's taken her a lot.
00:18:29 Maria Bamba
She's the one that's taken the longest to come around.
00:18:32 Maria Bamba
And it's...
00:18:33 Maria Bamba
It's been, it's kind of difficult and it's not easy, but it's not that it's not doable, right?
00:18:41 Maria Bamba
But it's consistency, really encouraging these girls to, you need to come out there, you need to get out there, 'cause my oldest I wanted to mention.
00:18:49 Maria Bamba
is actually in college now.
00:18:51 Maria Bamba
Wow, okay.
00:18:52 Maria Bamba
Yeah, and she's studying to be a veterinarian.
00:18:56 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:18:57 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:18:58 Athena Cordero
That'll be helpful on a ranch.
00:19:00 Maria Bamba
Well, that's the plan.
00:19:01 Maria Bamba
So when I said that we were doing this together, you're really doing this together.
00:19:05 Athena Cordero
That's so cool.
00:19:06 Maria Bamba
Yeah, and my other one, she's graduating this year.
00:19:10 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:19:11 Maria Bamba
She's going into medical.
00:19:13 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:19:14 Maria Bamba
So, and my third,
00:19:16 Maria Bamba
She is undecided, but that's okay.
00:19:19 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:19:19 Maria Bamba
She's still, she's new.
00:19:20 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:19:21 Maria Bamba
And it's gonna take her a while, but she is really, the older ones, she's just kind of like following.
00:19:26 Maria Bamba
It's kind of cute, you know, to watch how the older ones already have the structure.
00:19:30 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:19:31 Maria Bamba
And it's a girl house.
00:19:33 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:19:34 Maria Bamba
You know, so us girls just kind of rule and we're very strong women and
00:19:40 Maria Bamba
they know that they need to push forward and take advantage of the opportunities that are before them so that they can become something and have, they can take care of their own families someday.
00:19:49 Athena Cordero
What a great, like what a great opportunity to have role models right in front of you, even in a situation where you're in foster care.
00:20:00 Athena Cordero
And I'm speaking specifically about your youngest, to have that right there in front of you, not just, you know,
00:20:10 Athena Cordero
the idea of what could happen, but you're watching it, right?
00:20:13 Athena Cordero
Like you're watching these two older sisters of yours who have been in a situation similar and how it's working for them in front of you every day.
00:20:24 Athena Cordero
That's awesome.
00:20:25 Maria Bamba
Oh, yeah.
00:20:25 Athena Cordero
It's just right in your face, right?
00:20:27 Maria Bamba
And like I said, it isn't easy.
00:20:29 Maria Bamba
We have our moments, but you know that saying, we pray together, we stay together.
00:20:36 Maria Bamba
So we do have our moments and they're girls, teenage girls, and there's drama.
00:20:41 Maria Bamba
I'm about to say that there isn't.
00:20:42 Athena Cordero
Yeah, of course.
00:20:43 Maria Bamba
And with girls, everything is an emotion.
00:20:46 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:20:48 Maria Bamba
And that's what the fuel is.
00:20:51 Maria Bamba
I mean, you get that emotion going and you put it in the right direction and you put those kids, it's like I said, they'll just keep going straight.
00:20:59 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:21:00 Maria Bamba
It's because you put that idea in their mind that you want a better life for yourself.
00:21:06 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:21:06 Maria Bamba
And here's the opportunity.
00:21:08 Athena Cordero
Is that, and I can imagine for you,
00:21:13 Athena Cordero
You had a heart for this in the beginning, it sounds like, but then as the years have gone by, it sounds like they have really just increased.
00:21:22 Athena Cordero
I mean, exponentially your desire to do this.
00:21:26 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:21:26 Maria Bamba
They will, they actually proved it to me that it works.
00:21:30 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:21:30 Maria Bamba
And remember now these girls all, the one common denominator that they all have though, and I believe with all foster trauma, they come from some type of trauma.
00:21:39 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:21:39 Maria Bamba
So when you,
00:21:42 Maria Bamba
get girls that all come from trauma.
00:21:44 Maria Bamba
They may be different stories, but trauma in itself at period.
00:21:49 Maria Bamba
Gotcha.
00:21:50 Maria Bamba
And when you emphasize that,
00:21:54 Maria Bamba
They need to be a little bit more kinder to each other, take care of each other.
00:21:59 Maria Bamba
In my household, the girls have to take care of each other, whether they like it or not.
00:22:04 Maria Bamba
It's the older one's responsibility to take care of the younger ones.
00:22:07 Athena Cordero
That's a great family expectation.
00:22:09 Maria Bamba
No, absolutely.
00:22:10 Maria Bamba
Yeah, I appreciate that.
00:22:11 Maria Bamba
Has to be.
00:22:12 Maria Bamba
And that's the structure, you know, the kids knowing that they have someone that has their back.
00:22:18 Maria Bamba
And knowing when they're going to go, like they want to go to parties.
00:22:21 Maria Bamba
Of course.
00:22:22 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:22:23 Maria Bamba
And they want to have friends come over.
00:22:24 Maria Bamba
I have one coming over tonight, but my rule is I have to meet them first.
00:22:30 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:22:30 Maria Bamba
I need to meet the parents.
00:22:32 Maria Bamba
And then they can spend the night.
00:22:35 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:22:35 Maria Bamba
I really do not like my girls to go spend the night anywhere else.
00:22:39 Maria Bamba
Very protective.
00:22:40 Maria Bamba
That's kind of how I grew up in, yeah.
00:22:42 Maria Bamba
But I don't mind them coming to my home.
00:22:44 Athena Cordero
Exactly.
00:22:44 Maria Bamba
Not at all.
00:22:45 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:22:46 Maria Bamba
And I don't mind having their friends come along.
00:22:49 Maria Bamba
And if they're going to a party, for instance, it's a discussion because it has to be chaperoned.
00:22:55 Maria Bamba
So if my youngest or my middle is going, girl is going, they automatically already know to ask if the other way could go because they're not allowed to go.
00:23:07 Athena Cordero
It's safe, though.
00:23:08 Athena Cordero
I mean, that's a safe way to go.
00:23:10 Maria Bamba
You kind of have to be.
00:23:11 Maria Bamba
Yeah, of course.
00:23:12 Maria Bamba
You can't trust
00:23:13 Maria Bamba
anyone.
00:23:13 Athena Cordero
You can't.
00:23:14 Maria Bamba
But to make them aware and be smart, is the best defense you could actually have.
00:23:20 Athena Cordero
And moving on into their grown lives, I absolutely agree.
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00:24:10 Athena Cordero
So give me maybe just one or two.
00:24:14 Athena Cordero
You said there were some challenges.
00:24:16 Athena Cordero
They're all girls, which that's the case in any house with a lot of girls, right?
00:24:19 Athena Cordero
There's going to be some challenges.
00:24:21 Athena Cordero
and teenage years, what maybe would you say was one of the toughest or could be the toughest challenges?
00:24:31 Maria Bamba
The toughest challenge would be that they all understand each other.
00:24:37 Maria Bamba
Because I think, and that's been my biggest role, is making my older ones
00:24:44 Maria Bamba
understand where the younger one came from to be a little bit more compassionate.
00:24:48 Athena Cordero
Gotcha.
00:24:49 Maria Bamba
You know, but once we talk about it, once I've pointed it out to them, it takes them a while to see it, but then with a little bit of blessing and God's help, it just kind of works out that way.
00:25:03 Maria Bamba
Gotcha.
00:25:04 Maria Bamba
I think because the intention is good.
00:25:05 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:25:06 Maria Bamba
You know, you can't go wrong.
00:25:08 Maria Bamba
if your intention is good, it's going to work itself out.
00:25:11 Maria Bamba
You just have to have a little bit of faith.
00:25:12 Athena Cordero
That's true.
00:25:13 Athena Cordero
I mean, it might be a little bumpy.
00:25:15 Athena Cordero
But if you're always thinking out of love or thinking about the other person, you're right.
00:25:19 Athena Cordero
I mean, you'll get there.
00:25:21 Maria Bamba
Yeah, you'll get there.
00:25:22 Maria Bamba
You just kind of have to have the patience.
00:25:23 Maria Bamba
And sometimes I just let it work itself out.
00:25:25 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:25:26 Maria Bamba
You know, all of them have animals also.
00:25:28 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:25:29 Maria Bamba
Yeah, I just wanted to mention that.
00:25:32 Maria Bamba
helps A lot.
00:25:33 Maria Bamba
And to me, that sounded like a challenge, but okay, tell me how that goes.
00:25:38 Maria Bamba
And the funny thing, this is really funny.
00:25:40 Maria Bamba
The funny thing is my girls, we, everybody walks in the household.
00:25:46 Maria Bamba
So they have to walk the animals.
00:25:48 Maria Bamba
So when they come home from school, they have to go walk their animal.
00:25:50 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:25:52 Maria Bamba
And so everyone's taking their own animal and going on their walks.
00:25:56 Maria Bamba
And so that's their responsibility.
00:25:59 Maria Bamba
But it's really funny because
00:26:02 Maria Bamba
They try to get out of it because they're tired from school.
00:26:04 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:26:05 Maria Bamba
Yeah, I don't want them slide, right?
00:26:06 Maria Bamba
I don't let them slide, you know, the animals need that also.
00:26:09 Maria Bamba
Yeah, you know and and That kind of like when I said about animals being such a really good support system for children You have no idea my younger one the new one that I have the dog fall every animal we've practically got
00:26:26 Maria Bamba
has been one that's followed my kids home.
00:26:29 Maria Bamba
And we keep trying to find them good homes.
00:26:31 Maria Bamba
One time there was even a pig.
00:26:33 Maria Bamba
A pig literally followed my children home.
00:26:38 Maria Bamba
A little bit.
00:26:38 Maria Bamba
It was a pet.
00:26:39 Maria Bamba
It was someone's pet.
00:26:40 Maria Bamba
Yeah, but literally a pig followed my children home.
00:26:44 Maria Bamba
So and actually even when I call a
00:26:50 Maria Bamba
I call SPCA, the ones that are for dogs.
00:26:52 Maria Bamba
Yes, they are actually full.
00:26:54 Maria Bamba
So they know me by first name because the dogs follow my children.
00:26:59 Maria Bamba
That's interesting.
00:27:00 Maria Bamba
Yeah, that's why I need a ranch.
00:27:01 Athena Cordero
What do you do when the pig follows your kid home though?
00:27:04 Athena Cordero
What is that conversation?
00:27:07 Maria Bamba
You got to be kidding me.
00:27:09 Maria Bamba
That's what I said.
00:27:10 Maria Bamba
Exactly.
00:27:11 Maria Bamba
First it's animals.
00:27:12 Maria Bamba
I'm like, no, guys, seriously, we can't have any more animals.
00:27:15 Maria Bamba
And then next thing you know, it's a pig.
00:27:18 Maria Bamba
And I was like, we are on a farm.
00:27:21 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:27:22 Maria Bamba
But like I said, this is where, this is how God works in mysterious ways.
00:27:26 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:27:28 Maria Bamba
My oldest daughter, I have an oldest daughter, and she's actually on her own.
00:27:31 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:27:32 Maria Bamba
She, animal lover, just like her mother.
00:27:34 Maria Bamba
She turned around, found the place, a home, a ranch that they're not going to
00:27:39 Maria Bamba
hurt the pig.
00:27:40 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:27:40 Maria Bamba
That they're actually gonna raise it.
00:27:41 Maria Bamba
The pig will be part of the family.
00:27:43 Maria Bamba
Yes.
00:27:44 Maria Bamba
The pig found a good home.
00:27:45 Athena Cordero
Good.
00:27:45 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:27:46 Athena Cordero
I mean, so, but with the idea of having animals, support animals or taking care of animals, what have you seen change maybe in the girls because they have that responsibility or that care?
00:27:56 Maria Bamba
It's something for them to talk about.
00:27:58 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:27:58 Maria Bamba
To, you know, they compare their animals to each other and they give each other pointers.
00:28:04 Maria Bamba
And it's something that where they can collaborate together, you know what I mean?
00:28:09 Maria Bamba
They can come together and have something to talk about.
00:28:11 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:28:12 Maria Bamba
So, you know, and it's, that's the biggest thing is getting them, when we're gonna go somewhere, oh, they are on their best behavior.
00:28:21 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:28:21 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:28:22 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:28:23 Maria Bamba
And they know me well enough to know that if we're gonna go, if we're not all on the same page, then we're not going.
00:28:31 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:28:31 Maria Bamba
You know?
00:28:33 Maria Bamba
they help each other when it comes to chores.
00:28:37 Maria Bamba
I can tell you which ones are my, slackers and the one that's just like, she already knows.
00:28:41 Maria Bamba
We got to get this done.
00:28:43 Maria Bamba
And they've realized that I'm not on them.
00:28:47 Maria Bamba
And it's not as hard as they think it is.
00:28:49 Maria Bamba
I mean, they have their chores that are up on the wall, I mean, on the fridge, I'm sorry.
00:28:54 Maria Bamba
And so they know who does, what, what, dang.
00:28:57 Maria Bamba
and you have to kind of have it like that.
00:29:00 Maria Bamba
way there's no arguments and there's, it's already in black and white.
00:29:03 Maria Bamba
This is what you need to do.
00:29:04 Maria Bamba
That's your responsibility.
00:29:05 Maria Bamba
Now, any deals they make on the side.
00:29:07 Athena Cordero
That's their business.
00:29:08 Maria Bamba
That's their business.
00:29:10 Athena Cordero
But that's good too.
00:29:11 Athena Cordero
Yeah, that's good.
00:29:12 Athena Cordero
I like that the pets, the animals give them common ground because even bringing in a new girl
00:29:20 Athena Cordero
to two that have been with you for a bit is, I would imagine, is a transition, in itself, but to have the animals as a common denominator for them, it can be an icebreaker, I would imagine.
00:29:32 Athena Cordero
Yeah, so I can see how that would be beneficial.
00:29:34 Maria Bamba
Projects at home is a good one too.
00:29:37 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:29:38 Maria Bamba
When I do a project like cleaning out the garage or going through there, we have a spring cleaning and it's a thing where everybody gets in it.
00:29:46 Athena Cordero
All hands on deck.
00:29:47 Maria Bamba
All hands on deck.
00:29:48 Maria Bamba
They have to go through their clothes.
00:29:50 Maria Bamba
We gather and it's a ritual.
00:29:52 Maria Bamba
And then we prepare for winter.
00:29:54 Maria Bamba
So that's another thing that we do.
00:29:56 Maria Bamba
The household runs on everyone's participation.
00:30:00 Athena Cordero
That's so awesome.
00:30:01 Athena Cordero
Maria, as you're explaining this, I mean, I know we're talking about
00:30:04 Athena Cordero
being a foster parent, but you are really just breaking down family dynamics, family roles, relationship, faith, love.
00:30:14 Athena Cordero
In a family, whether you're a foster parent or not, those things are what make the family run and make it successful.
00:30:23 Athena Cordero
Anyone can benefit from hearing this.
00:30:25 Maria Bamba
Oh, absolutely.
00:30:26 Athena Cordero
Especially with, you know, teenagers, because like you said, that's an interesting time of life already.
00:30:32 Athena Cordero
And so I guess right now, what I'm thinking is with your plans to, eventually do this group home.
00:30:40 Maria Bamba
More of like a ranch.
00:30:41 Athena Cordero
A ranch, right?
00:30:42 Maria Bamba
Yeah, because I don't think the group home's gonna take all these animals.
00:30:45 Athena Cordero
I was gonna say.
00:30:46 Maria Bamba
They're attracting the animals, you know, it's about a vibe.
00:30:49 Athena Cordero
If a pig follows the kids home, yeah, the ranch is probably a better idea.
00:30:54 Athena Cordero
What I really want to know from your perspective, your experience,
00:31:01 Athena Cordero
what you think foster kids need the most to thrive, because you did say that they're usually coming from some type of traumatic experience.
00:31:10 Athena Cordero
So I'm imagining that you have a goal or something that you would like to offer, you know, kids coming to you once you do this.
00:31:18 Athena Cordero
And I do believe you'll do it.
00:31:19 Athena Cordero
I could see it in your face.
00:31:21 Maria Bamba
What is I'm almost there, actually.
00:31:23 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:31:23 Athena Cordero
What is the what is the one thing that you're hoping
00:31:27 Athena Cordero
that when they're with you and eventually leave, that they're taking away or that they're getting?
00:31:31 Athena Cordero
Like, what does that look like for you?
00:31:34 Maria Bamba
I'm hoping, actually, that I plan on making this a family business because it already is.
00:31:39 Athena Cordero
It sounds like it.
00:31:40 Maria Bamba
It is.
00:31:41 Maria Bamba
And so basically, I just need them to go get their degrees, come back, and let's make this legitimate in a sense.
00:31:48 Maria Bamba
So the goal is with these girls, like I said, is
00:31:54 Maria Bamba
they're already, I've already put that in their minds where they need to go, right, and what they need to do for themselves.
00:32:02 Maria Bamba
So once they picked their career, it just kind of all fell into place.
00:32:07 Maria Bamba
But granted, I know we have a lot ahead of us.
00:32:10 Athena Cordero
Of course.
00:32:11 Maria Bamba
But I plan on using the county's support and the people that I meet from
00:32:18 Maria Bamba
being in foster care.
00:32:21 Maria Bamba
I would like to eventually do like a group session with just foster parents to be support because I think that's the hardest thing is, foster parents taking in kids that's not theirs.
00:32:34 Maria Bamba
And then when a situation happens, what do they do?
00:32:37 Maria Bamba
I mean, we took all these classes and you would think that prepared you.
00:32:41 Athena Cordero
That's where I was going.
00:32:42 Athena Cordero
Exactly.
00:32:43 Athena Cordero
I'm sorry.
00:32:43 Athena Cordero
Yeah, no, go for it.
00:32:44 Athena Cordero
That's perfect.
00:32:45 Maria Bamba
But
00:32:46 Maria Bamba
But every situation and every child is different.
00:32:49 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:32:49 Maria Bamba
I mean, you can take all the classes you want until an actual incident happens, and you have to apply with a good heart, actually, I think.
00:32:59 Maria Bamba
And it's not always what you think.
00:33:00 Maria Bamba
So it's best to keep an open mind.
00:33:04 Athena Cordero
So with that in mind, and like I said, I can see from your face, I wish everyone can see how you look when you're talking about this, but I could see from your face what kind of heart you have for this.
00:33:16 Athena Cordero
The way you talk about it, the way you describe it, if you were going to give, you know, anybody thinking about becoming a foster parent, some advice, just one small piece of advice or who took it on and they're like, oh my gosh, I don't know, you know, how I'm going to do this.
00:33:33 Athena Cordero
What's something that you can offer them just to help them see, you know, what the experience could be like or to help them prepare and get themselves ready for such a responsibility?
00:33:45 Maria Bamba
I would say that they need to use all their resources.
00:33:48 Maria Bamba
And when they need the one, the one thing that we don't have is a really good support group for preparing these foster parents.
00:33:57 Maria Bamba
It is one thing to have them take the online classes, but you got to understand, talking to people more on a one-on-one basis or even someone who's been there already and has
00:34:09 Maria Bamba
has been a foster parent and can kind of help them through things, I think we would benefit a lot from that.
00:34:17 Maria Bamba
I believe that they're not going to be able to, you can't anticipate how a person's going to react, right?
00:34:23 Maria Bamba
I mean, and we can't control what happens, but we can control how we react.
00:34:27 Athena Cordero
Right.
00:34:27 Maria Bamba
Because we're, you know, we're the parents, we're, we're the ones that are the leaders.
00:34:31 Maria Bamba
So we also have to lead by example, you know, so my girls hold me accountable to
00:34:37 Maria Bamba
That's awesome.
00:34:38 Maria Bamba
They do.
00:34:39 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:34:39 Maria Bamba
It's good because I do the same for them.
00:34:41 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:34:42 Maria Bamba
So I think that that dynamic works.
00:34:45 Maria Bamba
You know, they call me out too.
00:34:47 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:34:47 Maria Bamba
You know, if they think, and there is a little bit of, because my new girl's new.
00:34:52 Maria Bamba
So yeah, she's the baby.
00:34:53 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:34:54 Maria Bamba
Right now.
00:34:54 Maria Bamba
And she does get a little bit more.
00:34:57 Maria Bamba
And the girls notice that and they point it out to me.
00:35:00 Maria Bamba
And I try to go
00:35:02 Maria Bamba
go back and mellow it out and try not to be, but I do try to make them understand that I did the exact same thing with them.
00:35:09 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:35:10 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:35:10 Maria Bamba
I was very protective.
00:35:12 Maria Bamba
I yielded a lot, you know, to just let them, you know, go their way and let's just see how they do.
00:35:18 Athena Cordero
So it sounds like, I mean, of course it all starts with your heart.
00:35:22 Athena Cordero
I know that, but it sounds like that communication piece, but listening, really listening to the kids.
00:35:29 Athena Cordero
that flexibility, but then also not being afraid to provide that structure because it is helpful and they do want it.
00:35:38 Athena Cordero
is something that they do want.
00:35:39 Athena Cordero
It sounds like too, Maria, that there are some things that you probably could suggest or hope that the foster system itself could do more of.
00:35:53 Athena Cordero
whatever that looks like.
00:35:54 Athena Cordero
I know that's probably a whole other episode, but the support group and the ongoing communication for parents sounds like what you think would be most helpful.
00:36:02 Maria Bamba
I really do.
00:36:02 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:36:03 Maria Bamba
Because I came from having to find out myself.
00:36:07 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:36:08 Maria Bamba
But again, I have a passion for the kids.
00:36:10 Maria Bamba
See, I know what it's like.
00:36:13 Maria Bamba
And so I know what it's like to lose everything and I know what it's like to not have anyone there for you.
00:36:22 Maria Bamba
I come from a place where I get it.
00:36:23 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:36:24 Maria Bamba
So that alone is what opened the door, for me to say, what?
00:36:31 Maria Bamba
And so I tested the water.
00:36:32 Maria Bamba
I didn't just jump.
00:36:34 Maria Bamba
Well, I did with the other two, but taking on, I've rotated children in the last year, about four of them, and every single one of them wanted to stay.
00:36:42 Athena Cordero
So I haven't even asked that.
00:36:43 Athena Cordero
How many kids have you, how many kids have you had as a foster parent?
00:36:48 Maria Bamba
I, in the past year, I didn't decide to take this.
00:36:52 Maria Bamba
that I had.
00:36:52 Maria Bamba
Yeah, yeah.
00:36:53 Maria Bamba
My son passed in two years ago.
00:36:55 Maria Bamba
So I was in a grief process.
00:36:57 Maria Bamba
I took a year of just deciding what I wanted to do, but I did know I didn't want to be where I was.
00:37:04 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:37:04 Maria Bamba
I wanted to be in touch more with mental health, with children.
00:37:11 Maria Bamba
I already worked for the school district.
00:37:13 Maria Bamba
I was already, you know, working for a purpose.
00:37:16 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:37:17 Maria Bamba
But this one I wanted to do more one-on-one because in my experience, I realized
00:37:22 Maria Bamba
It was always my thing to say, I can do that better.
00:37:25 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:37:27 Maria Bamba
I can make that better.
00:37:28 Maria Bamba
Yeah.
00:37:29 Maria Bamba
Like my children.
00:37:30 Maria Bamba
Here's a good example.
00:37:31 Maria Bamba
We don't eat out.
00:37:33 Maria Bamba
We cook everything from scratch.
00:37:36 Athena Cordero
That's a good way to build family and relationship and trust too.
00:37:41 Maria Bamba
Oh yeah.
00:37:41 Maria Bamba
Absolutely.
00:37:42 Maria Bamba
And so
00:37:44 Maria Bamba
like I said, my home works in the structure.
00:37:46 Maria Bamba
So the fact that I'm not home right now, I've got the other one making fried rice, probably.
00:37:51 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:37:51 Maria Bamba
Now, you know, so that's the food for the rest.
00:37:54 Maria Bamba
So it, and they love and they're piglets.
00:37:58 Maria Bamba
So that works out great.
00:37:59 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:38:00 Maria Bamba
And so I've taught them how to cook.
00:38:03 Maria Bamba
And so they all know how to cook.
00:38:04 Athena Cordero
So even the other kids, sorry.
00:38:06 Athena Cordero
And I mean, I'm going to ask again.
00:38:07 Athena Cordero
So how many kids, how many kids have you had at this point?
00:38:12 Maria Bamba
I have had a total of four at one time.
00:38:16 Athena Cordero
Okay.
00:38:17 Maria Bamba
One was one foster was rotating out.
00:38:20 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:38:20 Maria Bamba
And one was coming in.
00:38:22 Maria Bamba
Okay.
00:38:22 Maria Bamba
In fact, I, like I said, I have a passion for it.
00:38:26 Maria Bamba
And when I found out that there was a girl, she was 16 years old and
00:38:34 Maria Bamba
that she was going to be staying in your temporary thing, which is not that great for the children, you know?
00:38:43 Maria Bamba
I went at 11 o'clock at night to go get her.
00:38:45 Maria Bamba
Wow.
00:38:46 Maria Bamba
Because you know where they come from.
00:38:49 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:38:49 Maria Bamba
And the best thing you can do is just give them a room.
00:38:51 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:38:52 Maria Bamba
Have some privacy.
00:38:53 Maria Bamba
Right.
00:38:53 Athena Cordero
You know, and- That means a lot, I can imagine, yeah.
00:38:56 Maria Bamba
Oh, yeah.
00:38:57 Maria Bamba
She thanked me practically crying that I came that late to come and get her.
00:39:02 Maria Bamba
But, you know, the thought of leaving her and it was a Friday.
00:39:05 Maria Bamba
So it was it might have been the weekend.
00:39:08 Athena Cordero
Weekend.
00:39:08 Athena Cordero
Yeah.
00:39:08 Maria Bamba
And so no, I went and got her.
00:39:10 Athena Cordero
Wow.
00:39:12 Athena Cordero
Yeah, I've learned so much from listening to you right now.
00:39:16 Athena Cordero
Thank you so much.
00:39:17 Athena Cordero
I appreciate the details that you gave.
00:39:21 Athena Cordero
I want to high five all your girls.
00:39:23 Athena Cordero
It sounds like they're doing a really good job, but that is also
00:39:27 Athena Cordero
because of you and your heart condition.
00:39:29 Athena Cordero
So please, hear from me and all of us here.
00:39:33 Athena Cordero
I'm just going to speak on behalf of CAHELP who get to work with kids, social workers, clinicians who get to work with kids in tough situations.
00:39:41 Athena Cordero
So to know that there's folks out there like you with your heart who are willing to leave at 11 o'clock at night to go pick a kid up so that they can have some place safe, I mean, that makes a world of difference, especially for
00:39:56 Athena Cordero
For those of us who have a tough job and need the fuel to keep going, to hear that makes a huge impact.
00:40:02 Athena Cordero
So I appreciate you.
00:40:03 Maria Bamba
Oh, thank you.
00:40:04 Maria Bamba
Appreciate you.
00:40:05 Maria Bamba
Thank you for having me.
00:40:06 Athena Cordero
Of course, when you get moving a little bit more with your ranch, I hope you come back and talk to us about how it's been going so we can hear your experience and your goal and how that's moving for you.
00:40:17 Maria Bamba
I love that.
00:40:18 Maria Bamba
I love that.
00:40:19 Maria Bamba
Thank you.
00:40:19 Athena Cordero
Perfect.
00:40:20 Athena Cordero
Perfect.
00:40:20 Athena Cordero
Thank you so much.
00:40:23 Ending Disclaimer
Before we wrap up, we want to remind you that if you or someone is facing a crisis, help is available.
00:40:31 Ending Disclaimer
You are not alone.
00:40:33 Ending Disclaimer
If it's an emergency, please call 911.
00:40:37 Ending Disclaimer
For immediate support, you can reach out to the Crisis and Suicide Hotline by dialing 988.
00:40:44 Ending Disclaimer
Remember, taking the first step to ask for help is a sign of strength.
00:40:49 Ending Disclaimer
Stay safe, take care of yourself,
00:40:52 Ending Disclaimer
take care of each other.
00:40:54 Ending Disclaimer
Until next time, be well.
00:40:57 End Ad
By day, Derek supports students and families as a school administrator.
00:41:01 End Ad
At home, he took that commitment even further by fostering to adopt.
00:41:06 End Ad
In this episode, Derek shares what it's like to advocate for children both professionally and personally, offering a unique perspective on how schools can better support students in foster care.
00:41:17 End Ad
His story bridges leadership, compassion, and lived experience.
00:41:21 End Ad
It reminds us that real change often starts at home.
00:41:24 End Ad
Don't miss this inspiring conversation about education, advocacy, and family.
00:41:30 End
See you next time.
