EP 17 | From Managing Symptoms to Living Fully with Colitis

In this episode, I’m opening up about my own journey with colitis—how it began, what it took from me, and the unexpected ways it reshaped my life.

For years, I let my diagnosis dictate what I believed I could and couldn’t do. I built a life around avoiding flare-ups, managing symptoms, and staying “safe.” But somewhere along the way, I realized I wasn’t just protecting my health... I was shrinking my world.

In this deeply personal conversation, I share:

• The early signs I ignored and the turning point I couldn’t avoid
• What it felt like to lose pieces of my identity to illness
• Why chasing “remission” isn’t the same as healing
• The mindset shift that helped me stop living like a patient and start living like me again
• How rebuilding trust with my body became the foundation for everything else

This isn’t just a story about colitis. It’s about breaking out of the limitations we place on ourselves when life doesn’t go to plan. 

If you’ve ever felt defined by your diagnosis, my hope is that this episode helps you see the possibilities that still exist, even when the path forward looks nothing like you imagined.

Transcript

Amanda: this journey for me has completely Changed the way I look at health and the way our bodies function and the way that,

We treat illness with a medication. it's turning that completely on its head and realizing that we have it backwards 

the only way to truly make a difference is by continuing to ask why and back up, and ask why the symptoms are happening in the first place.

I feel like people are rejecting that form of reactionary medicine if we look at our situations, 10, 15 years ago, this was kind of all we were given. This was our only option. This was all we had, but now there's more information out there and people are starting to understand that they have a choice.

And I think a lot of people are starting to reject that and saying like, no, I don't want something that is just going to artificially manage. these symptoms. I want [00:01:00] something that is going to address the root cause of this issue. And people are starting to push for more 

 And, you know, in my situation, I'm so glad that I went.

And sought out a second opinion. And it was actually my mom that pushed me to, go and consult with a naturopathic doctor. And she basically said like, what do you have to lose? You spend a couple hundred dollars and if it doesn't help, Oh, well, you know,

Katie: Yeah.

Amanda: you can't keep going the way you're going. you need to look for answers.

and that decision ultimately changed My life so it's great to see that these conversations are happening more and that people are starting to consider other options and look at different perspectives when it comes to health.

Katie: I suppose your journey was slightly different because you had a traumatic time before you were diagnosed, didn't you? 

Amanda: Yeah, it's interesting because, I joined the military when I was 19 years old and, I [00:02:00] dove into this life of. wanting to travel and see the world and push myself in a way that I hadn't before. So I was in training for several years, all around the country and Then started training to deploy overseas and, did a tour in Afghanistan for nine months.

And I think that I'm a mentally strong person and I always have been. So I very much had this idea that as long as I was mentally tough, I could withstand anything.

 There's this funny balancing act when we talk about resilience. So, you know, you talk about your training, for bodybuilding and being in the gym and that form of stress, it does prime your body for being more resilient. But there's a fine line between building and destruction.

Amanda: And I didn't realize that I was on the side of [00:03:00] destruction. I was on the side of,

pushing myself hard physically, mentally, emotionally,

not fully understanding yet how to support my body with sleep and nutrition and Just lifestyle choices in general. 

would, we would train hard all day and then go and drink beer 

Katie: in the evening and, just acting as if I was bulletproof as if nothing could touch me but I also had an idea at the time that what I was doing was healthy.

Amanda: Like, I remember distinctly thinking when I received my diagnosis, Well, this isn't right. Like, I don't deserve this. I've been doing everything right. I exercise. You know, like, I eat vegetables occasionally. 

I don't understand. I don't deserve this. And, I just had, I had no, understanding of what chronic [00:04:00] stress, and trauma can do to a person's body.

I had no understanding of how the nervous system works and how years of chronic stress and dysregulation in our nervous system adds up and affects all of our systems in our body. I had zero concept of any of this.

Actually wasn't until a few years later, a few years post diagnosis after trying the medications and like I said, just not getting the relief and continuing to suffer.

And I remember I got to the point where I was avoiding eating entirely because I would rather just feel hungry

Katie: Yeah.

Amanda: my day 

Katie: than feel those excruciating cramps and pains that came with digesting my food. and that was my strategy for probably the better part of a year. and you can imagine what that ends up doing to your energy and [00:05:00] vitality and, you know, mental acuity, all of the things, 

Yeah. And you're

Amanda: and.

Katie: you're immune function too. 

Amanda: Yeah, pretty much everything. If we're not, if we're not, actually supporting the body nutritionally and giving it what it needs, you know, you can't just, you can't just avoid food for eight months. It doesn't work that way.

Katie: No.

Amanda: But that was my strategy. That was my coping strategy at the time. And I remember.

So when I did seek out that second opinion, when I went to consult with the naturopathic doctor, one of the things that she asked me was to make a timeline of my, significant life events for the past five to 10 years. I had, graduated high school, joined the military, moved all over the country for training, went overseas.

To a war zone, came back to Canada, got married, had a child, moved across the country [00:06:00] again, got a divorce, moved across the country again, started a business. This was all within a 10 year span of time, and she's the first person that, really made that connection for me that. Stress on your body and chronic stress, what it actually does to your system.

And then up until that moment, I had no, not even an inkling of thought that all of these crazy chaotic things that had happened in my life could be having an impact on my health,

Katie: like so like no awareness, no awareness whatsoever because you're almost just in survival mode at this point. as much as we don't actually factor in the wins that we have along the way, we just almost disregards. everything else. and like you said, it just amounts to this destructive, almost too resilient mindset where you're not giving yourself [00:07:00] any self compassion whatsoever. 

Amanda: Yeah, yeah. Not listening to the cues that your body is trying to give you. The body will start in whispers and give you these little nudges of, yeah, maybe you should start looking after yourself better, but we don't listen because we're not taught to listen and we don't believe that, the things we do really have that big of an impact.

Katie: Yeah.

Amanda: symptoms. Just get stronger and stronger until they're unignorable. and then we are handed a diagnosis and we go, Oh. What happened? I don't understand.

Katie: Where does this come from? 

Amanda: Yeah, exactly.

Katie: Yeah. Yeah. You're a hundred percent the nail on the head.

Amanda: I think that that paradigm is starting to shift. Thankfully, and recognizing that, you know, the illness we're diagnosed with in our sixties really begins in our thirties and that our health isn't as simple as a quick cause and [00:08:00] effect, I remember even when I started, on my healing journey and I started really looking at the food that I was eating I still had that really short sighted mindset of, Oh, I'm in pain or I have bleeding.

What did I eat today? You know, as if it was, just that cause and effect kind of,

Katie: Yeah. A lot of the time it's not the case. 

Amanda: No, a lot of the time it's like, what has been going on this week or this month? have you been. Getting enough sleep. have you been under a lot of stress have you been pushing yourself too hard have you been under eating and maybe relying on too much caffeine or sugar or alcohol or, you know, all of these things.

yeah,

Katie: it's a lot. 

Amanda: But I, I ultimately, moved out of that place of poor me. Why did this happen to me to the complete opposite to a mindset of viewing my illness as a gift because My illness woke me up, [00:09:00] you know, I was very much just existing in long term survival mode for years and not even recognizing it.

And my illness woke me up to what I was doing and the effect that it was having and has allowed me to Go back to school and re educate myself and learn about holistic health and nutrition. And, I don't think I'll ever stop learning about these things because

Katie: Mm.

Amanda: I understand, the more I want to know and the deeper I want to understand.

And I think that hopefully things start to shift in this direction so that We are learning these things from a young age 

 And from a parent, I think teaching your children these types of practices that they can then start implementing as they grow up, then that in itself is going to prevent them from disease. And, type of [00:10:00] awareness, that can be generational, is so important because then when they have children, they're going to be a lot more relaxed, 

Katie: hopefully, they're not going to be suffering from anxiety, because they'll know how to control their emotions, and even you're growing a baby inside your body, if you're not going through these levels of anxiety or looking after yourself, actually, you're giving that baby more tools to, again, prevent disease.

And this is like generational. So it's gonna give our whole population A new level of life and hopefully a better quality of life too, because people will be getting, less sick and that's what we want.

Amanda: Yes, and I think that that's a huge part of it is it's our medical system is very much focused on, how do we stop people from dying because we're so afraid of dying, [00:11:00] right?

Katie: Mm.

Amanda: there's been very little emphasis on quality of life and health span and how can we. live healthy, strong, vital lives for longer so that we aren't just, dependent on the medical system and getting all of these diseases 

I don't think it has to be that way with a lot of these illnesses. By learning and by educating the next generation. This is why I love working with moms so much and why moms are Mostly who make up my clientele is because you educate a mom and the whole family benefits their whole family starts to shift their habits and everybody notices this ripple effect of health, in a family, which I think is just so beautiful.

Katie: Yeah. Very fulfilling.

Amanda: I'm curious about what your turning point was when you started. Was there a moment for you when you shifted the way you looked at your illness? Was there someone that came into your life or something that you [00:12:00] learned that caused you to change the way you were living and, and really start making some changes?

Katie: I think it was just the general consensus of suffering from horrendous side effects from the biologic. things like extreme hair loss and I'd pass out a lot of the time my blood pressure's low anyway, but the biologic would just make it go crazy low. And I just got to a point after six years of thinking. I was still having flare ups almost comparing it and being like having the perspective actually on what, what have I got to lose at this point? I have all the tools that I need in my toolbox to know what to do actually give my body the space that it needs to heal and take myself on this path.

But I think, and this falls under a lot of people as [00:13:00] well, is having the confidence to actually execute. because we're almost kind of fear mongered into being on medication and thinking, well, if I'm not on medication, then I'm going to die. it's just having that backing of yourself to say, no, this is not working for me.

I need to do something different because how

Amanda: Yeah. 

Katie: possible? To have pretty much, like, no positive outcomes, but have the potential and high potential and high risk of getting cancer because that was one of the side effects, along with 20 other pages of side effects like I just didn't want to I didn't want to put myself through that anymore You know, I was sitting in that hospital chair Getting that infusion pumped into me every six to eight weeks and just resenting it 

Amanda: [00:14:00] Okay. Okay.

Katie: the way that I wish I had done, know, years ago but

I didn't have the knowledge that I have now so again I can't, I'm not going to blame anyone, I'm not going to have victim mentality, 

Amanda: That's so scary that because you are very much conditioned to believe this is your only option. And if you knowingly decide to stop taking this medication, you're essentially like, You're making that decision for yourself. you are fully responsible for what happens. 

Katie: So

Amanda: definitely feel that there is [00:15:00] a

Katie: I'm

Amanda: fear mongering element to,

Katie: tool. 

Amanda: our healthcare system.

Katie: is

Amanda: You know, I was on,

Katie: right

Amanda: never got to the point where I was put on biologics. And thank goodness because I.

Katie: site.

Amanda: I found a solution before that point,

Katie: Keyword.

Amanda: but I was on three different types of medications, 

Katie: can go

Amanda: and told that I was, had to be on them forever. and like you, I made the choice, to try something different and took myself off all medications.

and it was scary because there is that, even though there's that deep, innate feeling that, I think my body can heal if I support it properly,

Katie: with

Amanda: still that.

Katie: called

Amanda: voice in the back of your mind that's saying like, what if this is the wrong decision? 

Katie: because you're basically having to be accountable at that point. And I think that a lot of people are, and I was scared of. Putting that responsibility into my own [00:16:00] hands and not being able to, like, almost, like, rely on someone else to heal my body for me, I suppose, in a way.

Amanda: We are conditioned to outsource the responsibility of our health to someone else. We don't want to hold fully the responsibility of our health.

Katie: yeah.

Amanda: like to go consult with a doctor and then whatever they say, they're on the hook. If they do something wrong, you can sue them, 

Katie: do you know what

Amanda: but when,

Katie: Yeah.

Amanda: but when you have the responsibility and you're saying, no, I think I know best.

Katie: Yeah,

Amanda: my body and I'm going to make this decision. It's all on you. 

Katie: Yeah, and I think it scares the living daylights out of people.

and upon reflection, it was probably one of the main things that held me back, That doesn't make you a bad person or a coward or anything like that. It's literally just the way that you've been brought up and conditioned.

[00:17:00] So undoing that, it takes work, but yeah, it is possible and we're both living proof of that. 

Amanda: Yeah. And yeah, it's hard to even at the beginning, it's hard to even speak of it. like I said, I had a fear of sharing my story too loudly. because who am I? To speak on this, right? 

I'm not a doctor. I don't have a medical degree. And so I felt like I wasn't qualified to speak on these issues, but.

In actuality, we are the most qualified, you know, given what we've gone through to speak about this and, provide that 

Katie: blueprint almost for other people. 

 not everyone is going to have the same journey because people have had more trauma in their life than others. People will have to work on certain areas of their life [00:18:00] more than others. it's very subjective, but the general consensus is.

It's the same and the thing that starts that and kicks it off is believing in yourself.

Amanda: absolutely. And believing that that healing is possible, believing that, that there's much more to the picture than what we've been led to believe, where you just sit back and wait to get sick. And. I think that that's the biggest message that I, want to share with our audience is that belief plays a huge role in your healing.

because if you subscribe to the way of thinking that you are sick and you view yourself as a sick person and you, you fully believe that narrative of, you are chronically ill and that's how you will be for your whole life and there's no cure and take these medications. I think that [00:19:00] that is a huge part of what kept me stuck for the few years that I was there.

 When I started, I don't view myself as

Katie: This,

Amanda: a sick person anymore.

I don't find that my illness really. 

Katie: to,

Amanda: runs my life anymore. It does. It's not even really that much of a thought in my mind most of the time. And

Katie: provided

Amanda: people who are listening, who may be really in the throes of struggling with, chronic illness symptoms might think that that's Unheard of that they could get to a point where they don't think about their illness anymore, but I think it's possible and I think just knowing that it's possible and starting to shift your mindset toward a healing mindset and how can I support my body better versus viewing yourself as a chronically ill person and then that's just What you're stuck with for good is, probably one of the first [00:20:00] steps.