Ep 79: Habits of a Whole Heart with Arnie Herz and guest Rabbi Shalom Paltiel P2 on hmTv

Episode 79: Habits of a Whole Heart with Rabbi Shalom Paltiel (Part 2)

In this deeply insightful continuation of Habits of a Whole Heart on hmTv, host Arnie Herz welcomes back Rabbi Shalom Paltiel, chief rabbi of Chabad of Port Washington, for Part 2 of their powerful conversation on Judaism, ego, and the transformative power of spiritual habits.

Together, they explore why it’s often easier to show compassion to animals than to fellow humans, how Torah wisdom anticipates our deepest emotional challenges, and why the Tenth Commandment—"Thou shalt not covet"—holds the key to inner peace. Rabbi Paltiel shares timeless teachings from Pirkei Avot, the Talmud, and Kabbalah, emphasizing the impact of discipline, consistency, and behavior on the human soul.

With relatable humor, profound clarity, and practical takeaways, this episode unpacks the difference between freedom and true liberation, and shows how habitual mitzvot can lead us from ego-driven lives to heart-centered, God-connected living.

Tune in for a soul-stirring dialogue that bridges ancient Jewish wisdom with modern psychological insights—and learn how to build habits that align your daily actions with the essence of your highest self.

Subscribe and share to keep the conversation growing.

Transcript

Episode 79 – Habits of a Whole Heart with Arnie Herz and Rabbi Shalom Paltiel (Part 2) | hmTv

Hello and thank you for joining me today. I’m your host, Arnie Herz, and on today’s episode of Habits of a Whole Heart on hmTv, I’m once again joined by my special guest, Rabbi Shalom Paltiel, the chief rabbi of the Chabad of Port Washington in Long Island, New York. We’re continuing our rich conversation from the previous episode about how the concept of a whole heart relates to Judaism and the teachings that guide us toward deeper, more meaningful lives.

Rabbi Paltiel, thank you again for joining us for a second episode. I truly felt our last conversation was incredibly thought-provoking, and I know there’s more to uncover.

Rabbi Paltiel:
It’s a pleasure to be back, Arnie. And let me just say, you’re very good at this. You bring out meaningful questions and you bring the best out in your guests. I hope your listeners know how fortunate they are to have you.

Arnie Herz:
That means a lot. You make it easy for me. Last time, you touched on something powerful—the recognition that all of creation is interconnected, that harming any part of it is like harming ourselves. But you also made an interesting point—that many people find it easier to show respect to animals, plants, or the environment than to other human beings. And you referenced this in connection to the Nazis, which is very relevant since we’re filming this in the studios at the Holocaust Memorial & Tolerance Center.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Yes, it's a painful paradox. People may love animals and nature, yet they struggle with other human beings. That’s because animals and objects don’t challenge our egos—they don’t compete, disagree, or reflect back to us. Another human being is another universe, another image of God, and that often confronts us in uncomfortable ways. It’s easier to love a pet than a person who has their own opinions and faults.

Arnie Herz:
That’s so true—and it connects to this deeper teaching in Torah. I think it’s mentioned 36 times that we must treat the stranger, the orphan, and the widow with dignity. It’s as if the Torah is anticipating our struggle with ego and providing a path beyond it.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Exactly. The Pirkei Avot, or Ethics of Our Fathers, speaks about three things that take a person out of the world—jealousy, lust, and the desire for recognition. A little of these things can be fine, but when they dominate, they destroy our humanity. Judaism teaches us we are bigger than that—we’re most human when we can celebrate others' successes without feeling diminished.

There’s a great story about one of the Chabad rebbes and his brother. The brother stood on a chair to be taller, and their father told him: “Don’t make yourself bigger by making others smaller. Lift yourself by lifting others.” That’s the essence of a whole heart.

Arnie Herz:
And it’s echoed in the Tenth Commandment: Thou shalt not covet. That commandment stands out because it seems to speak more to thought than to action, yet it's so central. So much of modern life—advertising, media—is designed to stoke envy and discontent. And yet, the Torah asks us to go against that grain, to elevate ourselves toward contentment.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Yes, and it’s no accident that “do not covet” is number ten. It’s the anchor. Because when you don’t covet, you’re not driven to steal, to cheat, to disrespect. You’re at peace with who you are and what you have. That’s what Judaism teaches—it acknowledges our animal soul, our instinctual nature, but calls us to elevate it with our godly soul. Not to crush the animal within, but to train it, guide it.

Arnie Herz:
And that’s where habits come in. The title of this podcast is Habits of a Whole Heart. What role do habits play in Jewish life?

Rabbi Paltiel:
Habits are everything. Judaism is deeply behavioral. The mitzvot—the commandments—are about actions: say this prayer, eat this food, avoid that behavior. It’s all habit-forming. And the beauty is, when you build the right habits, the heart follows.

That’s a revolutionary idea. We often think the heart must come first—"I’ll give when I feel generous, I’ll say kind words when I feel love." But Judaism says no. Do the deed, and the feelings will catch up.

Arnie Herz:
And science is catching up. Psychology now supports what Torah taught all along—that behavior can shape emotion. Smile even when you don’t feel like it, and it changes your brain chemistry.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Exactly. Take the habit of saying “good morning” to people. At first, it’s mechanical. But eventually, you start caring about those people. Your heart softens. Your soul wakes up. You become more whole.

Arnie Herz:
And the mitzvot guide that process. We’re not guessing—we’re handed this beautiful, ancient system. 613 mitzvot, though not all of them are practiced today. But it’s a framework for living with discipline, compassion, awareness.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Yes, and as you mentioned earlier, only about 87 mitzvot are currently applicable. So it’s very doable. Think of the greats—Einstein, Mozart, elite athletes. They all had structure and discipline. That’s what gave them the freedom to express their greatness. Freedom through form. The sun rises and sets—there’s rhythm in nature. Judaism aligns us with that rhythm.

Arnie Herz:
And it redefines freedom. Not as doing whatever we want, but as living true to who we are—liberation, not indulgence. There’s a Hebrew word for that—cherut—meaning engraved. It’s about inscribing our higher self into our daily actions.

Rabbi Paltiel:
Right. True freedom is not escaping discipline, but choosing the right one. When you discipline yourself in pursuit of your higher self, you’re not constrained—you’re liberated. You’re in alignment with your purpose.

Arnie Herz:
And that brings us back to the whole heart. When we build the right habits—not just occasional good deeds, but consistent, intentional patterns—we live more from our godly self. And over time, we cultivate wholeness.

Rabbi, thank you so much for this incredible conversation. I’d love to invite you back for a third episode—we’re only just beginning to scratch the surface. To our listeners, thank you for joining us on Habits of a Whole Heart on hmTv. Don’t forget to subscribe, share, and join us again for more thought-provoking conversations.

Until next time, take care—and be well.

4o

ChatGPT can make mistakes. Check important info.