Ep 81: Raised by Survivors with Bernie Furshpan and guest Frieda Hoffman on hmTv

Episode 81 – Raised by Survivors with Frieda Hoffman
On this heartfelt episode of Raised by Survivors, host Bernie Furshpan sits down with Frieda Hoffman, the daughter of Holocaust survivors, to reflect on growing up in a home shaped by unimaginable resilience. Together, they share powerful memories of their parents, the lessons they learned, and the unspoken bond among second-generation survivors. From the strength found in small communities like Seagate, Brooklyn, to the enduring mission of carrying forward survivor stories, Bernie and Frieda offer wisdom, humor, and profound insight into honoring the past while inspiring the future. This conversation is a moving reminder of the importance of education, empathy, and preserving history for generations to come. 

Transcript

Episode 81 – Raised by Survivors with Bernie Furshpan and guest Frieda Hoffman on hmTv, cleaned up and properly formatted without timestamps:

Bernie Furshpan:
Hello, my name is Bernie Furshpan. I'm your host of HMTV’s Raised by Survivors. I'm here with a very special guest, Frieda Hoffman. How are you today?

Frieda Hoffman:
I'm very well, Bernie. Thank you for asking.

Bernie:
Thank you so much for sharing this time with me. You’re also a child of Holocaust survivors, correct? Just like myself.

Frieda:
Correct.

Bernie:
Our upbringing was a little different than other people's upbringing. I’m grateful that I grew up with both my parents because I learned a lot of amazing values from them, and I miss them terribly. They were my heroes. Where did you grow up?

Frieda:
We moved to a small community in Brooklyn. Not many people have heard about it — it’s the only gated community in New York City, at the very tip of Coney Island. It’s called Seagate.

Bernie:
Very close to Coney Island! I used to work at Coney Island Hospital. We’d go to Coney Island for Nathan’s hot dogs. They still have those competitions!

Frieda:
They do!

Bernie:
Do you miss living in Seagate? What memories do you have of it?

Frieda:
I don't miss it because we still own the house my parents bought back in the early 1950s. We're there at least once a week checking on the tenants and the house. Seagate has changed a lot since I grew up there, but it’s a community over a hundred years old, so naturally it has evolved.

Bernie:
When was the first time you remember learning your parents were Holocaust survivors?

Frieda:
To be perfectly honest, I don't have a specific memory of "learning" it. It was just a fact of life. I think that’s true for a lot of second-generation people — it wasn’t something you were told one day; it was just woven into daily life.

Bernie:
You shared that in common with friends who were also second generation?

Frieda:
Yes. Our parents had circles of survivor friends — what they called landsmen — and also American friends. Two worlds.

Bernie:
Did your parents ever watch Holocaust films?

Frieda:
Not that I remember. But I do remember communal dinners and holidays with other refugee families. Survivors often didn’t have any extended family left, so they formed a new kind of family together.

Bernie:
My parents were the only survivors in their families too. My father lived in Chelm, Poland, and my mother came from Vilna — now Vilnius, Lithuania, once known as the "Jerusalem of Europe."

Frieda:
Yes, Vilna had one of the largest and most vibrant Jewish communities.

Bernie:
When did you realize your upbringing was different from your school friends?

Frieda:
Pretty early. I didn’t have aunts, uncles, cousins, or grandparents, and most of my friends didn’t either — unless they were also children of survivors. Most of us were only children because many survivors lost their first families in the war.

Bernie:
What kind of food did your mom make?

Frieda:
She wasn’t much of a cook — neither was mine — but she made Old World food like gefilte fish, chicken soup, and chopped liver. She also made cha, which is calves’ knuckles in gelatin.

Bernie:
Oh my god, my mother made that too! I’d open the fridge and think, "Is there a dead body in here?" (laughs)

Frieda:
(laughs) I loved it!

Bernie:
Did you ever see your parents cry?

Frieda:
I saw my mother cry, but not about the Holocaust. More about contemporary events. Survivors wanted to protect their kids — not burden them.

Bernie:
I saw my dad cry when my brother and I graduated high school. I think to him, it symbolized survival and triumph. We were the fruits of his survival.

Frieda:
Absolutely. Every grandchild and great-grandchild is a victory over Hitler.

Bernie:
Do you still have friends from Seagate?

Frieda:
Yes, I stay in touch with one friend in particular. Having someone who shared that background is special when you don't have siblings to reminisce with.

Bernie:
Not all survivors spoke about their experiences, right?

Frieda:
Correct. Many didn't want to burden their children or relive the trauma. But over time, with films and documentaries, many decided to tell their stories.

Bernie:
We, the second generation, often feel a moral obligation to carry their torch.

Frieda:
Absolutely. My father never spoke about his survival — he escaped to the forest, but I never got the details. I thought I had time, but he passed at 69 before I could ask.

Bernie:
Your mother gave a testimony to the Spielberg Shoah Foundation, right?

Frieda:
Yes. It’s a six-hour film. I've only seen it once — it’s very hard to watch.

Bernie:
Every testimony is so moving. It’s impossible not to be affected.

Frieda:
Technology now allows survivors to "interact" with audiences digitally, which is incredible. But listening is still painful for many of us with unresolved questions.

Bernie:
That’s why I urge young people — talk to your grandparents now. Find out about your history while you still can.

Frieda:
Yes. And learn how hard life used to be. Survival wasn't guaranteed.

Bernie:
And we hope the next generation will learn the lessons — that hatred leads nowhere but to tragedy.

Frieda:
Education is key. We have to keep telling the stories, because history repeats itself when we forget.

Bernie:
Exactly. Holocaust education teaches not just tolerance but empathy — real understanding.

Frieda:
Accepting that we are all different, but fundamentally the same.

Bernie:
Traveling teaches that too. My wife and I love seeing different cultures, and also realizing how lucky we are to live in a place with freedoms many don’t have.

Frieda:
It’s true. With all its flaws, America still offers so much.

Bernie:
Did you learn skills from your survivor parents?

Frieda:
My father could do anything — painting, construction, electronics. If he’d had more education, who knows what he could have achieved.

Bernie:
Same here. My father taught me resilience. Problem-solving. If you hit a wall, go over, under, or around it.

Frieda:
My parents emphasized making the most of every opportunity. They wanted me — and my children — to have everything they were denied.

Bernie:
They invested in us — with everything they had.

Frieda:
Yes. And when my children were born, my parents were the most loving, doting grandparents.

Bernie:
Same here. Their greatest pride was not what they achieved — but who we became.

Frieda:
Good people. That’s what mattered most to them.

Bernie:
This was a wonderful conversation, Frieda. Thank you so much for sharing your story.

Frieda:
Thank you, Bernie. You're an excellent host — insightful and thoughtful. It’s been an honor.

Bernie:
Thank you so much. And thanks to our audience for eavesdropping today on this meaningful conversation here at the Holocaust Memorial and Tolerance Center on hmTv. I'm Bernie Furshpan, host of Raised by Survivors. Until next time — stay well.