Ponder and Magnify: A Rosary Podcast

S1, E14 - The Crucifixion Bible Study (John 19: 25-30)

• John and Jessica Helling • Season 1 • Episode 14

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The mission of the Ponder and Magnify Podcast is to seek an encounter with Jesus through praying the rosary, relying on the grace of the Holy Spirit and the intercession of Mary. Join us as we dive into the Fifth Sorrowful Mystery of the Rosary! In this episode, Jess, John, and Fr. George discuss the account of Jesus' Crucifixion from John 19: 25-30. Praise be to God!

Jessica:

Hello and welcome to the Ponder and Magnify podcast, where our mission is to seek an encounter with Jesus through praying the Rosary, relying on the grace of the Holy Spirit and the intercession of Mary. I am so happy that you are here. Here today I am joined again by my husband, John and Father George Staley. We will be diving into the fifth and final sorrowful mystery of the Rosary Jesus' crucifixion. Father George, would you open us in prayer?

Fr. George:

I would be happy to, in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen, Jesus, our crucified and loving Lord, we thank you so much for your sacrifice on the cross, which brought our salvation. We ask that our hearts may now receive the graces that you won for us at the cross, that we be filled with your love, with your forgiveness, with your presence. Jesus, meet us wherever it is that we are today, and, by the power that comes from the cross, may it transform our hearts and our lives. Jesus, we ask this in your most Holy Name, amen.

Jessica:

Thank you, John. I'm kicking it to you first for word or phrase. How are you feeling right now?

John:

I'm going to share a word that I first learned about in fourth grade and when I heard it I didn't know if it was a real word. I thought it was the craziest word I'd ever heard, and that is discombobulated. And I'm feeling discombobulated, kind of, with my days of the week. You know, we had an almost snow day on Wednesday. We thought it was going to happen. It didn't happen. So it was kind of almost like I don't know, just not knowing if I was going to have the day off. It's thrown off my sense of what day of the week it is. Even got out a little bit early another day this week. So it's like I'm excited tomorrow's Friday, but it could be Saturday, it could be Sunday, I don't know. I'm all disoriented. How about you guys? Anyone have a word or phrase?

Fr. George:

I think my word, if I were to choose one, would be tired Like I was just, you know, just feeling a little tired, which is fine. I mean, it's okay to feel tired, Jesus felt tired, and so, yeah, just feeling that on the natural level.

John:

Are you a little discombobulated too?

Fr. George:

One might say maybe even a little discombobulated.

John:

I thought you might.

Fr. George:

There you go um. Yeah, tired, tired, but good like tired in a good way. So jess

Jessica:

love it.

Jessica:

I, uh, guys, I'm marveling tonight. I'm. That's where I'm at right now. We are at our final episode in this series on the Sorrowful Mysteries, and this is just still so crazy to me that we've gotten to this point, that this is even becoming a reality. Thank you, God, thank you, Holy Spirit. Praise be to Jesus. Seriously, that's where I'm at. I just can't believe we're here. So with that, we are going to dive in here to the crucifixion, and let me tell you, it was very hard. It's always fun to talk with Father George and John about what gospel passage we're going to read and meditate on for the episode, but this one was particularly hard. So I just want to encourage you to really go into your Bible at where Jesus is being crucified. There's so much beauty and so much depth there. I just it was hard to make a choice, but we landed on a good one for sure. They're all good, of course, but, Father George, I'm going to turn it over to you now. Go ahead,

Fr. George:

sure

Fr. George:

We'll be reading from the Gospel of John, towards the end and in particular, just the powerful moment of their being at the foot of the cross. So we just ask come, Holy Spirit, open our minds to hear your word and to receive you. A reading from the Holy Gospel according to John, Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother's sister, Mary, the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there, whom he loved, he said to his mother Woman, behold your son. Then he said to the disciple Behold your mother. And from that hour the disciple took her into his home. After this, aware that everything was now finished in order that the scripture might be fulfilled, Jesus said I thirst. There was a vessel filled with common wine, so they put a sponge soaked in wine on a sprig of hyssop and put it up to his mouth. When Jesus had taken the wine, he said it is finished and, bowing his head, he handed over the spirit.

Jessica:

what really is sticking out to me about this after some reflection time, is really just Jesus entrusting Mary to John and entrusting John to Mary and I love the way that he says woman, behold your son.

Jessica:

And to John, behold your mother that deep, deep family tie of mother and son.

Jessica:

And, honestly, my imagination was led to imagine what would happen after this moment.

Jessica:

I was picturing Mary and John going back to John's home and I was picturing John really wanting to do everything to serve Mary, like maybe making a room for her, getting her something to drink, something to eat after what the events that just had unfolded.

Jessica:

And I was also imagining Mary wanting to serve John in return, her wanting to take care of him, and just this idea of Mary realizing that John was so precious to Jesus that she wanted to do everything to serve him and vice versa, the same thing, john realizing, like Mary was so precious to Jesus that he, like took such a sense of duty to take care of her, and it just really I felt inspired by this, just thinking gosh, if I can just zone into that with my husband and children and just all those, honestly, who I encounter in my day.

Jessica:

They are so precious to Jesus and I am getting the chance to serve them and just to receive from them wherever they're at, and I just that mutual entrustment and just even the idea that Jesus made sure that the people that he loved were taken care of. He didn't. He was tying up all the loose ends and the effort that would have taken to speak from the cross. He was making sure that the people he loved were taken care of and then in turn, they took care of each other out of love for Jesus. There's just something really beautiful there. Father George...

Fr. George:

Yeah, actually that line really stood out to me. The disciple took her into his home, and in the rosary and in Holy Communion especially, I imagine I have imagined that when I receive Jesus in communion and too when I pray for his presence in the rosary, that as he comes into my soul and into my heart that the Blessed Mother's already there waiting for Him, and it's almost like this room, that's in my own heart, that I share then in the joy of Jesus and Mary and the love that they have for each other, and then I get to share in that too and the love they pour out upon me and I get to return back to them other, and that I get to share in that too and the love they pour out upon me and I get to return back to them. It's just this deep sense of communion that I delight in, and that line kind of just brought it out.

Fr. George:

The disciple took her into his home, and so when I walk up to communion I imagine that and I can be doing that more when I pray the rosary as well-

John:

What I took out of it, or what was really sticking out to me, was when Jesus, after he has the wine, he says it is finished and he bows his head and he hands over the spirit and kind of, when I read the line like it is finished, I kind of imagine Jesus and hear this, this kind of you know, he's exhausted, he's obviously near death and it's just.

John:

But there's this like inner peace, um, of like the journey of, of leading up to this death that he was fearing and the agony of the garden, like that is like now that is all done and like what is to come, now that he's about to die, he's past the hard part and he's has relief of knowing what's to come, Um, and just simply just the model of and reminder of that to not knowing when we go but just to be able to hopefully say like it is finished and feel proud of that journey. You know, before it's our time to hand over our spirit. And yeah, I don't know, it was just. That part was just really really resonating with me.

Fr. George:

Yeah, that peacefulness that Jesus was so fully present and, yeah, led to that moment. So much of his life had been surrendered to the Father all the way up to that, and like here then, in this last moment, it just makes sense that like, yeah, now he just surrenders over and gives over. He's made that constant surrender and that peace that you speak, that desire in our own lives that we can, at the moment even of our own deaths, that we'd be able to say something like that.

Jessica:

I love too when you brought up that line. It really made me think of the ascension, where Jesus is commissioning the apostles to kind of carry forth the mission. And so I like thinking too that, yes, it was finished, like that was the perfect eternal sacrifice that is forever the remedy for our sins, and at the same time we join in that mission of just continuing to help. We have a role to keep drawing people toward it, and so, yes, he did finish it, but we also get to participate by helping draw people back toward that finished product, if that makes sense and just how we truly all have that charge in our hearts in our own way, and that's what we were made for. And just really kind of asking the Lord how am I called to direct people back to this moment of redemption? That is redemption for me and my salvation, I think is really cool to think about.

Jessica:

I also think, father George, as I'm sitting here more and just ruminating on what you said about receiving the Eucharist and imagining Mary already there in your heart. I recently heard her called under the title of Mother of the Eucharist, and so and I've honestly kind of been struggling on how to really think about that. But I love that image of just like Mary is already there waiting to receive, and also just the idea that she prepared the Eucharist in her womb like is also crazy to think about. But I just really appreciate you tying this mystery to the Eucharist. That's something I love about the rosary is just it really makes my hunger for the Sacraments just so much stronger. So I just really appreciate you sharing that.

Fr. George:

Thanks, praise God.

Jessica:

Either of you have anything else.

Fr. George:

The only other thing that I would just that is powerful for me whenever I think of this mystery, is an experience that I had in prayer where I was going through just a particularly hard moment and just and it's so hard that even in my imagination I was just flat on the ground Like just the life and the stress were just so overwhelming that I was just so burdened I couldn't even get up. And then I was helped up in this prayer experience by John, and then I looked over at the Blessed Mother and she wasn't looking at me, but she was looking up at Jesus. And as I looked over at her I was initially kind of like annoyed, like internally I was thinking like very like, don't you see me suffering over here? Like do you, do you care about what I'm going through? And then she just looked at me and didn't say anything.

Fr. George:

But I could really like in her, in her look in her gaze, she was saying like, yes, George, I see you. And look at my son. And then I was kind of like, oh right, that's the place where I need to be is looking up at Jesus. And as I looked at Jesus. It was the looking at Jesus that helped me to receive the grace that he was offering, to persevere in union with him, and so that it just I always think of that. It's just so authentically Mary too, she always points to her son. She always points us to Jesus. It's never about her, it's about her son. And just in our own moments, when we're overwhelmed and crushed by whatever life is burdening us with that, the invitation that Jesus and that Mary has is to look at Jesus and to keep our eyes and our gaze fixed on him.

Jessica:

That's so beautiful. Thank you, holy Spirit, for that. It's making me recall something I've read of Mother Teresa, which this passage is really especially with the I thirst in there, and how central and important that was to her heart. John and I always choose words of the year and this year my word was poverty and have. I've dedicated my year under the patronage of Mother Teresa, and so I'm really enjoying kind of walking with her through this year.

Jessica:

But I've read about how she envisioned herself at the foot of the cross too, and she in prayer, and she saw herself as a little girl and she saw herself as Mary, or she saw Mary behind her, holding her up so that she could just be present and be there with Jesus, and that's been a powerful image for me. I know my tendency, like so many of us, is to want to avoid suffering and for a long time when I tried to pray this decade or this mystery sorry, I didn't want to. If I imagined myself at the foot of the cross, I almost didn't want to look up at Jesus because I didn't want to have to encounter suffering or face suffering. And I just love the idea of what you said, father George, of just like Mary being there, with what you said, with what Mother Teresa said, just Mary being there to direct us up, to hold us if we need that, to just be able to gaze upon him and to just, you know, be with him in his suffering. Even when we can't make sense of our own Like, it's enough to just be there at the foot of the cross and really take that in. Father George, john, if you feel good about leaving things here, I just feel in my heart to really end with a prayer that comes from Jesus. Jesus inspiring Mother Teresa as she prayed and really inspiring her to hear his thirst directly for her soul. And then she in turn took that and encouraged the sisters and everyone to hear Jesus's thirst for their own souls. And so I want to read you these words and I encourage you to imagine these words coming to you directly from Jesus, and Mother Teresa would encourage you to do the same.

Jessica:

I thirst for you. Yes, that is the only way to even begin to describe my love for you. I thirst for you. I thirst to love you and to be loved by you. So precious are you to me that I thirst for you. Come to me and I will fill your heart and heal your wounds, I will make you a new creation and give you peace, even in your trials. I just really encourage you to hear your name with these words I thirst for you. You must never doubt my mercy, my desire to forgive, my longing to bless you and live my life in you, and that I accept you, no matter what you have done. I thirst for you. If you feel of little value before the eyes of the world, it doesn't matter. There is no one that interests me in the whole world more than you. I thirst for you. Open up to me, come to me, thirst for me, give me your life. I will prove to you how important you are for my heart.

Jessica:

Don't you realize that my father already has a perfect plan to transform your life, beginning from this moment? Trust in me. Ask me every day to enter and take charge of your life and I will. I promise you before my Father in heaven that I will work miracles in your life. Why would I do this? Because I thirst for you. And just as we close this episode and this series of discussions on the sorrowful mysteries, I just really pray that all those who are here listening can feel the love of the Lord for them and just know that Jesus thirsts for you personally, that He desires you, He longs for you, He's in a state of heartache over you, and I just hope that you can trust and believe that to be true. So with that, thank you so much for journeying with us on these sorrowful mysteries. We promise to keep praying for you and we ask you to pray for us. What a gift. Praise be to God.