S1E6: Life’s a Mess N’at? Redding Up Chaos with Simple Routines That Work

Life is messy — between burnout, stress, clutter, and emotional overload, most of us are just trying to hold it together. But you don’t have to stay stuck in survival mode. In this episode of This Is It! by Thriving Yinzers, we’re redding up the chaos — starting with what’s actually in our control: our daily habits, routines, and physical environment.

We break down why chaos overwhelms your brain, how it hijacks executive function, and why it keeps you stuck in fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. Then, we’re giving you practical tools to restore order — even if life feels like a mess n’at.

In this episode:

• Why your brain craves order
• The connection between clutter and overwhelm
• Executive function explained 
• Survival mode vs. intentional living
• Simple routines that reduce stress fast
• The Pomodoro Technique + small system wins
• How to start redding up anything (mind, home, or schedule)

This episode is real and full of tools to take back control — one small step at a time. 

🎧 Press play. 

Chapters

• 0:00 Why Our Brains Crave Order
• 2:46 Moving Through Chaos And Setbacks
• 5:25 From Disorganized To Systems That Stick
• 7:56 Executive Function Explained Simply
• 9:56 How Chaos Hijacks Your Nervous System
• 12:05 Night-Before Habits That Save Mornings
• 15:20 Reclaiming Time And Energy With Structure
• 18:02 Write It Down And Break Tasks Small
• 20:24 Timers, Pomodoro, And Small Wins
• 23:05 Declutter, Mindfulness, And A One-Step Challenge

Transcript

Sherry: 0:00

Hi, welcome back to This Is It ! by Thriving Yinzers. Lately, we've talked about some pretty heavy things. The challenges that life throws at us individually; the heartbreaks, the uncertainty in our world, and the chaos that seems to be everywhere you turn. When so much feels out of control, it helps to focus on what is within our control. Things like our own space, our routines, our peace of mind. We're talking about something our brains naturally crave: order. Our minds thrive on it. Without it, we slip into survival mode. We end up reacting instead of living and getting stuck in that cycle of fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.

Jodi: 0:44

We'll talk about how chaos affects us and practical ways to create stability in our everyday lives. Let's get into it.

Sherry: 0:51

So in our first segment, we're going to talk about order versus chaos. We aren't psychologists, but the way that I understand the psychology behind this thought is that our brains are naturally designed to identify patterns and create structure. I did learn it through my therapist when it was like an AHA moment for me. She gave me a handout that I've kept ever since. It's a single page that starts with the word chaos and gradually transforms into the word order. And when she gave it to me, it hit me that that was my life. I was stuck in chaos and seeking order in my life. So we crave order. It's how we function efficiently. And without it, our nervous system settles into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. Yeah. Life is life. It's unpredictable. And it's happening in ways that are planned, but it's also full of surprises. For me, it was a series of unexpected life events that were difficult and traumatic, and one after another after another. And with each new layer came a deeper level of chaos, which continued to grow until I was medically put on pause. My life was put on pause and I didn't have a choice. I had to take inventory of my own chaos. And I realized that I was really stuck in survival mode for a pretty long time. But at the time, I thought, well, that's just life. I just kept trying to ignore things and constantly rearrange my priorities and shove stuff aside. And that meant shoving things in closets, drawers, or anywhere just to get it out of my way so that I could put out the next fire, handle the next catastrophe.

Jodi: 2:33

Just keep moving.

Sherry: 2:34

Out of sight, out of mind. Yeah. So get it out of the way and just keep moving. That's exactly it. When I was in the classroom, that wasn't going to work. With a passion for teaching, also comes tons of ideas, materials, and papers. And I had to keep much of it in plain sight. So while the main classroom where the students were was neat, there was a certain point in the classroom where order turned to what I called organized chaos. The closer you got to my desk, the neatness gave way to the towering piles of paper, scattered notes, a controlled chaos. And that was because returning to school after a particularly rough concussion. It was my fifth or sixth concussion, and I was terrified of forgetting everything. So keeping everything visible became my safety net. And funny enough, one of my old administrators would definitely be shocked to know that I'm a home organizer now. I'm sure he would remind me of all that paper. But that chaos taught me something. I realized I wasn't just disorganized, I was missing systems. And once I learned to build them, I found peace. And now helping others to find that same calm through a structure brings me joy because I lived it.

Jodi: 4:00

Yeah! I always say that the people that are the best helpers is somebody who went through something tough. Or you know, you have a lived experience, you learn your way out of it. And then you want to share that knowledge. p

Sherry: 4:15

Yeah, there are some things that give you perspective and once you have that perspective, you want to use it to help other people. But there's a lot to be said about having structure and systems.

Jodi: 4:25

Yes. When we have structure in place, it does reduce our cognitive load. Instead of wasting mental energy making small repetitive decisions, we free up that brain power for creative space, problem solving, and just overall better decision making. I know myself, when I don't have structures in place and I feel like I'm just bouncing from one thing to the next, I start getting irritable. And quite frankly, I'm just not a nice person to be around when that's how I'm moving through my life. I'm really not, because I'm not giving myself the headspace that I need to, you know, free up that time to do the things that I actually enjoy doing. I want to have that time and that space to do what I want to do. And when I'm just bouncing, it just doesn't happen. I guess it's part of that freeze thing, right? I'm so busy trying to just complete tasks that aren't organized that then I'm just petered out by the end of the night.

Sherry: 5:21

Right. Think about a messy desk versus a clean desk, an organized workspace. When you sit down at a cluttered desk, it's almost as if your brain feels cluttered before you even start working. Your brain is tired before you've even gotten going. Right. And there's a lot of research on that, especially for people recovering from brain injuries or things like ADHD or chronic stress. I found a lot of it through my own head injuries and other life speed bumps, potholes, whatever you want to call it. There was a point where I literally had to write every step of my morning routine on a note card. I'm talking about the simple things like brush your teeth, wash your face, get dressed, all the things. And it feels a little embarrassing looking back at it, but that's what helped me rebuild function after having a series of cerebellar strokes on top of the history of multiple concussions and on top of other factors. I could not remember the necessary parts of my routine, even though I'd been doing them for years and years. It's things that we take for granted. You never really think about what's in your morning. It was like fast forwarding into a future era, into our later years. And that's when I really became more interested in understanding executive function and how our brains manage time, memory, planning, and emotion, because those are the things that I really had to work through in my situation. It's really important to have the structure, routine, and order. Those are the foundations necessary. For anyone struggling with executive function concerns, regardless of the cause, is what I'm trying to say. I gained the perspective through my particular situation, but there are a lot of reasons where executive functions need support. And you do that by getting structure, routine, and order.

Jodi: 7:14

Right. On the flip side, when we're stuck in chaos, whether it's unpredictable work schedule, cluttered home, unresolved emotions, it creates stress. And your mind's constantly trying to make sense of the mess. And it puts you in that state of overwhelm. Your nervous system into freeze mode, and the result is feeling stuck. When you're in that state, you're gonna have trouble with executive functioning. And I think that there's different levels and layers to that, isn't there? Y

Sherry: 7:39

Yep! So, like, but that's really what is executive functioning? The way that I look at it, it's like the manager of your brain. It helps you stay organized, it helps you plan ahead, remember important things, and helps control impulses. And it's what allows you to start and finish tasks, manage your time, and make decisions. And when it isn't working well, it can feel like your brain is constantly overwhelmed or out of sync. And as I mentioned briefly before, it can happen due to medical instances such as brain injuries like concussions or strokes, ADHD or other neurological conditions, chronic stress or anxiety, and even lack of sleep or exhaustion. Which there are many people for many reasons feeling overwhelmed or out of sync right now.

Jodi: 8:31

And we're gonna get into exactly why that happens and what we can do about it.

Sherry: 8:35

Yeah. In this segment, we're talking about how chaos disrupts our well-being. So let's talk about the real impact of chaos on our well-being. Chaos doesn't just make us feel overwhelmed, it actually does activate our fight, flight, or freeze response.

Jodi: 8:51

And it keeps us in that state of heightened stress, making it difficult to plan, stay motivated, and feel in control. Instead of being productive, we're just reacting to everything around us.

Sherry: 9:02

And it's that reaction mode, that's survival mode. We're not making intentional decisions, we're just putting out fires as they come up, like I'm always saying, playing whack-a-mole.

Jodi: 9:12

So think about that morning routine again. If it's unpredictable, maybe some days you skip breakfast and rush out the door, forget things, and your day starts on a stressful note. But when you have a consistent routine, it brings a sense of control and calm. I myself am a very slow moving morning person. I spent a lot of years beating myself up over it before finally just deciding to accept who I am and understand that that's me. I've never been able to just get up and get moving and I'm not ever going to join the 5 a.m. club. So knowing that I'm a slow morning person, I know that I have to stay ahead of the game. So I have to make sure that all my shit is ready to go so that when I wake up in the morning, I really don't have to think about it. I keep a separate bag for my day job, and everything that I need for that job has to be in that bag at all times. So as soon as I'm done work, everything goes in that bag. It stays there. So in the morning, I don't even have to worry about if I have all the things that I need because I know it's already there. Because as soon as I finished my work day, it all went back into the same place. And I make sure that my lunch is packed before I go to bed, my clothes are set out. And when I do this, I am a hundred percent more productive. I am less bitchy. I get shit done. I'm just a nicer person. And honestly, I don't always want to because I don't want to think about the next day in the evening. I really don't. And it took me a long time to get over that too, because at the end of the day, I'm like, I don't want to think about all this other shit. I don't want to think about the next day. But it really only takes 10 or 15 minutes to get your shit together the night before when you go to bed.

Sherry: 10:55

Yeah. And that's reminding me of what Matt Plutko said when we had him on with the self-mastery about the beginning and the ends of your day, which are so important. And that your morning routine starts the night before.

Jodi: 11:07

It really does. It really does. And it makes such a difference. Because then like I am able to do those things. I get up in the morning now, and because I don't have to worry about if I have all my things that I need for the day, I can get up slowly, I can stretch, I can meditate, I can have a cup of tea and not be frazzled and worried. Yeah, you're not scrambling around to find my car keys. They're already in the bag.

Sherry: 11:34

So you're setting the tone for the next day by how you're ending the previous one. That's why those small habits and routines make such a huge difference. Because you're not spending your brain power, like you said, looking for your car keys or whatever. You have everything ready the night before, and then you can spend the morning with the small habits that are gonna help set you up for of a day.

Jodi: 12:00

Right. And bring the space in for other things. Because I think for me that was the most important part of reducing that cognitive overload so that I it freed up time for me to be able to work on writing at the end of the day or just doing things that I enjoyed doing because I did get to a point where all of a sudden I'm like, I swear I used to be fun. I used to do cool shit. Where did that go? Why am I only working? I don't even have kids at home anymore. It's not like I have to have anybody anywhere after school. I now have all the time in the world, but for some strange reason it just didn't feel like that. And that is because I wasn't organized. Now that I'm organized, I've I'm getting more done. I'm getting more out of my time and realizing how much time I really do truly have. Because I think we all have more time than we think we have, don't we? We just don't know it because we're so busy with shit that we shouldn't be busy with. Okay. So let's get into how we can bring more of that into our lives.

Sherry: 13:02

If executive functioning is a challenge, I'm gonna talk about some simple strategies that helped me. And we know that what works for one person is not necessarily the right path for someone else. These are just some things that helped get me on the right track, so maybe it might help someone else. So I'll share them. The biggest thing is something that my dad constantly would say when he had brain cancer and his memory wasn't great. He was always telling us, write things down, write things down. And it seems like a basic thing, but a lot of people don't. And I didn't. I was just trying to keep track of it all in my head. And things pop up in your life that will interrupt, even if you are good at remembering things and or don't think you always need to write things down. Things pop up in life that hijack your routines. So not relying on memory, using checklists, planners, or apps. Some people prefer digital planners and some a traditional paper one. For me personally, because I'm an out-of-sight, out-of-mind girl, I am a paper planner all the way. I'm working my way back into using some of the digital stuff now, but I have to write it down on paper.

Jodi: 14:12

If you write something down, you're gonna retain it. When you see something on paper, your brain retains it better than it does when you do it digitally.

Sherry: 14:21

Yeah, maybe. All I know is when I was in the speech therapy for the brain injuries, I had a binder and I had to write down like the simplest things I had to keep in this binder. And I was instructed to every day start my day looking in the binder. So there's a reason for it. Yeah. But you have to explore until you find one that works for you. So writing things down is the first thing. The second thing is breaking tasks into small steps. Just like when you're teaching kids how to take care of a home, you really have to spell out every step. Every step, even the ones that you think are common sense.

Jodi: 15:00

My kids eat differently to me.

Sherry: 15:02

If I'm teaching them how to do something, there's a laminated paper in the bathroom that says how to clean the bathroom. And it is every single step that I do when I clean the bathroom. Because otherwise, you ask them to clean the bathroom and they might take a Clorox wipe and wipe the counter off, and then that's right.

Jodi: 15:19

And keep it small because I know like my kids would say, You overwhelm me because I give them too many things to do all at once.

Sherry: 15:28

Well, right, but there's also certain things that must occur for the bathroom to be clean, right? Regardless. But you're breaking it down one step at a time. So if there's any type of ADHD or any type of executive functioning hurdles, instead of clean the house or clean the bathroom, try, like you said, wash the dishes. And then when that's completed, wipe the counter. One thing at a time.

Jodi: 15:53

And for adults, it would look different. My mom used to say to me all the time, like when it came to keeping your house together, she noticed that I would just go from room to room doing a bunch of different things. And she's like, do one complete room at a time. When you're through that one room, then move to the next room.

Sherry: 16:11

Yeah. Now having two kids going off to college. I was getting very overwhelmed with that. And so I did two things. I brain dumped, and I usually brain dump into my planner, but this time I brain dumped and put it on the refrigerator because a lot of the tasks were not just for me. Handling one aspect of sending kids off to college at a time. You know, handling everything we needed for the dorm separately from handling the things that needed to be taken care of for the car in order to go to college and handling finances, not trying to do it all at once. Yeah. One small step at a time. So and the other thing that helps with whatever the task is was setting timers or reminders because alarms can keep you on track and prevent time from slipping away. Because it's like, where did the time go? I really love this one and I use it often. You might have heard of the Pomodoro technique, which is a time management method that helps you stay focused and productive. It works by breaking your work into 25-minute focused sessions called Pomodoros. And then you follow that with a five-minute break. And then after four Pomodoros, you take a longer break, which could be 15 to 30 minutes. That method helps prevent burnout and improves your concentration. It makes big tasks feel more manageable because you're tackling them in short, focused bursts, and you're also then stacking up small wins at a time because each 25 minutes you accomplish something, and then now you have some wins to build upon. And you know what? If you just want to do one 25-minute session, you're accomplishing something. We avoid doing things because it just feels so overwhelming. But if you just set your time for 25 minutes and get started, you can then decide that you're done after that 25 minutes. But most of the time, you're then motivated to do more because the hardest part is just getting started. A real. The Pomodoro technique was developed in the 1980s by Francesco Sorillo, and he named it after the tomato-shaped kitchen timer, which was around at the time.

Jodi: 18:32

I love it. I did not know that.

Sherry: 18:36

Me neither. But that's what he used to track his work sessions. So that's where it came from. So I thought it was like kind of cool. I hadn't heard of it until my recovery process, but it really is a game changer and it is massively helpful for getting kids to clean their room or whatever it is that they're reluctant to do. And you know what? It works for adults too. So you just set the timer and it's ready, set, go. And whether you're doing it with kids or maybe even for yourself, it makes it like a game and you get more done. And on the flip side of that is you don't have to be in a constant state of productivity. You gotta be mindful to also take intentional breaks because overloading your brain makes things worse. That's why whenever I brain dumped all those things yesterday, it really helped me to refocus. Short resets can really help you refocus. And then, as we talked about earlier, is creating routines. Because having that consistent structure, like you said, reduces decision fatigue, especially those morning and evening routines. They are so important. So having a structured start and end to your day can make everything in between feel more manageable.

Jodi: 19:50

Absolutely. Decluttering your space is truly a game changer. That physical clutter, it leads to mental clutter. And I just felt it because we're selling a house and I've been getting rid of a lot of stuff. And I feel so much better when I'm there and I'm in that space and there's not shit everywhere. I just physically feel lighter when I sit in a room that's not cluttered. And let's not forget about mindfulness. So whether it's journaling, meditation, taking a few breaths, inner order is just as important as external order. For me personally, it's huge. When everything starts to feel loud, seriously just sitting in a very quiet room and having everything turned completely off, sort of that inner reset of clutter is really big.

Sherry: 20:39

And it's it's easier to allow yourself to do that when you don't have clutter around you as well. So here's a little challenge for listeners. Identify just one area of your life that feels chaotic. It might be your schedule, your home, your meals, whatever it is. And this week, implement one small system to bring more order to that area.

Jodi: 21:02

Maybe that's setting a bedtime routine, organizing your workspace, or planning a meal ahead of time.

Sherry: 21:08

Yeah. Give the Pomodoro technique a try, set a timer, and go do that thing that you've been putting off. The key takeaway here is that order doesn't mean rigidity. It's creating a foundation that moves you toward thriving. When we prioritize structure in small intentional ways, we are freeing up mental space to focus on the things that really mattered to us.

Jodi: 21:32

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend. Let's keep the conversation going. And remember, this is it. Keep going and growing.

Sherry: 21:40

Thanks for listening. And since you listened all the way to the end of this episode, we do have a special offer just for you. If you could use some help getting organized, mention hashtag chaos to order for 20% off any service booked before December 1st, 2025. Fill out the contact form at thrivingyinzers.com to get started. This podcast is a product of Thriving Yinzers LLC. We conquer overwhelm by tackling your to-do list with services like organizational coaching, home decluttering, in-home laundry service, and personalized lifestyle assistance. To learn more, visit us at thrivingyinzers.com.

Sherry: 22:18

If you or someone you know is in crisis, please reach out to a trusted professional or crisis hotline in your area. Help is available 24-7 nationwide at the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. Dial 988 to connect with the Trained Crisis Counselor for free and confidential support. If you are local to the Pittsburgh area, Resolve Crisis Services offer 24-7 Crisis Intervention and Stabilization Services to all Allegheny County residents. You can reach them by calling 1-888-796-8226.

Sherry: 22:47

Okay, here comes the legalese, the oopsies, and the Yinzerese. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing shared on this podcast should be considered professional advice. Thriving Yinzers LLC, its hosts, or any associated parties are not liable for any actions taken or consequences arising from the information provided. Today's Yinzerese lesson. If you grew up in da Burgh, you might remember grandma telling you to redd up. In Pittsburgh, we roll up our sleaves, clear out the clutter, and take care of our shit and each other. And at Thriving Yinzers, we believe redding up goes far beyond your house. It's getting your mind, routines, and priorities in order so you can keep going and growing one small step at a time. Because when you redd up your life, you make room to thrive.

Jodi: 23:33

Another one on the books. It went 3 2 1. You missed it. Oh, okay. I was probably drinking. Okay, let's just go. I thought I need to go. Started doing really good. What the hell? Oh.