Facing Bias and Thriving in Leadership: A Conversation with Vicky Wright Hamilton

In this inspiring episode of The Color Between The Lines, Esther Dillard speaks with leadership coach, author, and trailblazer Vicky Wright Hamilton. Vicky shares her personal journey of overcoming bias in the corporate world — including being told she was only hired because of affirmative action — and how she transformed painful experiences into a powerful mission to empower women of color in leadership.

Drawing from her book Game Face: Corporate Success Strategies of a Trailblazing Black Woman, Vicky reveals leadership lessons and strategies to help others succeed without facing the same barriers.
This conversation is a must-listen for anyone seeking resilience, leadership insights, and inspiration to keep moving forward despite obstacles.

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Transcript

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On this edition of the Color between the Lines. to tell me to my face, you know, you're only there for affirmative action. You know that you're not qualified to be here. We hear from a black CEO who built an organization that supports single mothers. Like she wanted to be supported when her marriage ended in divorce. Foreign I'm Esther Foreign I'm Esther Foreign I'm Esther Dillard chatting with Dillard chatting with Dillard chatting with writers, authors writers, authors writers, authors and experts who offer and experts who offer and experts who offer an added perspective an added perspective an added perspective for listeners. for listeners. for listeners. This is the color This is the color This is the color between the lines. between the lines. between the lines. As you know, here on the color between the lines, I try to elevate authors. But this next guest is more than just an author. SA. SA. She's a former CEO and boss that built a business that supports black women that are single mothers that are interested in stem. But she's really more than that. She has an incredible story that includes marriage, divorce and dying during childbirth. Here's part of my interview with Vicki Wright Hamilton. Well, your book, Game Face, it explores really a journey as a black woman in a very male dominated industry of tech. I always admire people that are in tech because it, it's, it was, it is a challenge getting in that game and staying in it. What inspired you to write this memoir, which is extremely personal? How did you and how did your experiences shape the themes that are inside? You know, I will tell you that I was not going to write the book. My mother is the one who. My mother and my brother were the ones that were really inspired that inspired me to do so. I had gone through so many challenges and one of the things I used to always say is everybody sees the glory, but they don't know the story. And my brother used to say, well, if that's the case, why don't you tell it? And I said, nobody cares what I have to say. Everybody's got a story, so why should I write the book? Long story short, I ended up putting the book together and I was able to get it written and the e copy made. Before my mother died, she actually wanted to see the hard copy, but the hard copy came out the week she passed. But anyway, as I wrote the book, I started thinking about, you know, as a black woman in technology at the time, I was going through all of my learnings and lessons. There's so many things that people didn't know. Here's the blessing. I got promoted every two years, my entire career. But here was some of the curse was realizing that I didn't necessarily get promoted because of my skill sets or competency. I got promoted so that I could look like they had diversity. Now how did I know that? Because every time it came to talk about diversity, who do they have in the forefront? Me. Only me, because I was the only one. So as I began to navigate some of these waters, I said, you know what? As black women, we face so much. Who's going to be the person that's going to be authentic and real? Who's going to let them know what these challenges are, but more importantly, what are strategies to overcome them? And not just professionally, personally, because we'll walk in the door, we're a total person. So I took these strategies that I learned the hard way and figured out how I could make it work for me, for my emotional, mental and physical well being. And in terms of making that happen, I wanted to share the news. I wanted to help other women that are facing these same challenges. Wait a minute. If I can overcome, you can too. So that's how these strategies have shaped me to move forward, to lean back on when recognizing, recognizing that, you know, these are things that are going to happen that out of your control, but you can survive, you can make it and you can turn things around. Now I understand from what, I understand your strategy. Part of that is the name of this book, Game Face. And you explain in the book what Game Face is, Explain to our audience what that means to you and how it just kind of guided you throughout your career. Yes. So for me, you know, when people first hear Game Face, they think that you don't want to be authentic. I'm talking about just the opposite. I'm talking about being authentic, but being able to be seen, letting yourself understand even the things that are around you that you, that you can't see. Everything is a game. Life is a game. Everything we do is a game. So when you go into this environment, you're trying to figure out, how do I play this game to win? What do I need to do? How do I need to present myself so that they know that I'm just as successful. So it's about being authentic. It's about being able to learn how things work and read the tea leaves, the story that nobody ever tells you the things that are not painted, the things that are not told, but you're expected to know. So I wanted to give my audience something to relate to because guess what? We all have to go in to figure out how am I going to survive today, but more importantly, how am I going to thrive and move forward. You highlight in the book that back in college you dealt with a particular professor who will remain unnamed. That kind of helped you develop that game face strategy and how you said you used that as fuel to kind of navigate challenges in your. In the corporate world. If you could talk a little bit about what that was and how that changed things. Absolutely. So when I went to college, I ended up going, transferring, going to a college. My father was a professor in the finance department and my chairman of my. Of the computer science and MIS department was around the corner from him and I had taken a test and he loved to go run to my dad and tell him what I could and could not do. So he came and told my father that I failed this test and that maybe I needed to change my major. I won't go into what happened at the household around dinner table. Let's just say my mama didn't put up with that and she didn't stand for that. And she was like, you don't listen to what they say. Let's go, we gonna fix this. Needless to say, as he told me that I would not be successful and that I really needed to think about changing my major because I failed this test. I said, okay. So I worked hard. I ended up getting a B out of this class. After I graduated, I got ready to go to work. I got my first job, and my salary of my first job was more than his. I waited about three or four months and I wrote him a letter and I said, hi, how are you? I just wanted to let you know what a failing person in MIS looks like. This is where I am in my, my salary and what I'm doing and the things that I'm navigating and moving forward to hope things are great. And I put a copy of my first check in it. Now I gotta tell you, that felt good, but I wasn't quite satisfied yet. Couple years go by and I get promoted again. And I sent this letter and I said, hey, I just thought I'd check in. Not only am I not successful, but I just got promoted after two years of working. And I want you to know, here's my new title, here's what I'm doing, and guess what? This is my raise. And I sent him a copy of my check, knowing that it was 40% more than he was making, and he was the chairman of a department. Oh, my goodness. What did that do for your. Your. What it did for me was to let me know that they don't know the end. They don't know what you're capable of doing. And don't let anybody limit you. If you listen to that noise and let it get in your head, you won't move forward. I was bound and determined. I come from a mother that was an advocate, a father who was an advocate, who fought for their rights through civil rights and all the rest of it. And they just did not allow me to hear the noise that you can't. So I just use that negativity for positivity and say, okay, I'm going to show you. Tell me what I can't do. Let me show you. And that's what I did. I know that one of the most, I think, impactful chapters of this book was when you shared a personal moment about when your husband decided to leave you when you had just had a baby. And I was just devastated after reading that. I had to kind of put the book down and kind of walk away for a little bit. How did that experience shape who you are today and how you handle things when it comes to, you know, your professional relationship with other women who are single moms? Well, I will tell you that it was heartbreaking for me as well. I had known my husband 15 years before we married. We were best friends. And what I learned from that experience is some best friends need to stay best friends and not become husbands, number one. But number two, what I didn't recognize was the jealousy that existed. I didn't recognize how much he looked at as his male role, role as what he should do. And recognizing that even though he came to Minnesota, where I was and I was able to help him find a job, he felt like he needed to stay where he was to make his career go forward. I had asked him about getting a promotion, told him that while I was pregnant, I had an opportunity. Should I go for it? He said yes. The problem is he didn't expect me to get it, but I got it. And so it meant a relocation, but we were going to be closer to home, to our families. And his mother had a lot of implications of being able to tell him that she got yours. You got to get yours, you got to keep yours. So that made me really sit down and evaluate what was important to me. Needless to say, we divorced that experience from a personal level also resonated for me professionally. To understand that everybody doesn't want you to succeed. Everybody is not in a position to accept that. It may not be like tradition was. It's not like the man is making all the money and the woman isn't. And it's not like you should have to apologize for that. You have some really great insights in this book. For those of you who are just joining us, I'm Esther Dillard with the Color between the Lines on the Black Information Network, and we are speaking with executive coach and author Vicki Wright Hamilton. The book is called Game Face Corporate Success Strategies of a Trailblazing Tech Warrior. What is the last one lesson that you'd like those who are readers of your book Game Face to take away? And what would that be? When you read this book, the one thing I want you to look at is not just the professional and the professional strategies, but I want you to think about individually, even personally. Yes, I'm vulnerable in this book, but I think it's important for us to help each other to understand. How do you deal with personal trials and tribulations and still continue to succeed? Whether it's divorce, whether it's rape, whether somebody leaves you after a baby, whether it's there's lots of things that can occur, we can't change it. But what you can do is be more prepared for it. So I would encourage you to truly look at the personal strategies that are in here of things from lessons that I learned that hopefully you won't have to step in the same hole that you can succeed going forward. Vicki's story is also highlighted in a documentary called the Diary of Successful Black Single Mothers. The film shares the stories of other black single mothers with their extended families. It's a network that supports women and they share principles Vicki uses in her own life. Here's a short clip from the film. Dear Diary, My relationship with my parents influenced my relationship with my kids drastically. I have parents that have been together 40 years. I wanted something similar to that. The way my mom talked to me wasn't normal. It wasn't right. And I just wanted to get away from it. In the process of me getting the application to get married, I found out who I was actually getting married to. A known drug dealer in and out of jail. He was getting ready to go to Afghanistan. We tried the relationship thing. It just didn't work out. He was my college sweetheart and we went through quite a few ups and downs. He kind of like disappeared. He just wasn't the person for me. He said, I'll give you the money for the abortion. I said, no, you won't. I'm having my baby. He left me. He became a good dad right before he got killed. Well, where can listeners now find your book and connect with you to learn more about all the services and the great things that you're you're doing these days? Well, thank you so much for asking, Esther. They can contact me on my website at www.vickywhitehamilton.com. you can get the book there. You can set up a discovery call with me, give me a ring. I would love to have a conversation with you and see how we might be able to partner together. And that's V I C K I W R I G H T H A I L T O N com. If you'd like what you heard, be sure to subscribe to the Color between the lines on iHeartRadio or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Esther Dillard, and this is the Color between the Lines.