Awakening thru Discomfort |Kawanis Ellison’s Journey into Truth

Spiritual growth isn’t always peaceful.

Sometimes awakening dismantles the version of you that was built for survival.

In Season 2 Episode 1 of Awakening Cosmic Souls, we sit with Author, medicine woman, oracle, pattern disruptor Kawanis Ellison. Her work is a living transmission. Listen to our conversation with Kawanis as she shares her journey from spiritual awakening… to living in Costa Rica… to traveling to Gabon, Africa to sit with the sacred plant Iboga. You don’t want to miss this powerful conversation about transformation, shadow work, and the uncomfortable path of awakening.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Welcome to Awakening Cosmic Souls Podcast, Season Two.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

Where spiritual practitioners share their perspectives and practices, shaping new earth living. Not doing, just being.

SPEAKER_06 0:16

Welcome back. Welcome back. We are in season two.

SPEAKER_00 0:22

Season two.

SPEAKER_06 0:22

We are in season two, y'all. We made it to another year. Now we are in our first episode of the season, and we have something so special for you all. We are sitting here with the beautiful Koanis Ellison, also known as Zen.

SPEAKER_03 0:44

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 0:45

Y'all, oh my, this beautiful soul here, you have some way, somehow seen her beautiful face light up your feed. And to know her as a soul, you really get to experience a piece of what God feels like. She has such a beautiful soul, y'all. Um, not only is she now an author, yes. Yes, not only is she not only just a beautiful, beautiful story about herself, y'all. She's a medicine woman, she's an oracle, she is a pattern disruptor. Koanis is a living transmission. We are honored to have her here, have her share her story, and allow her gifts to be just freely seen right here. She is just really awake, awakening, like a radical movement right now. And everything that I have read in her journey has been something that is very relatable. So she has something in her book for everybody. And we are ready to get into this episode. I think you all are going to really enjoy it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:57

Definitely, definitely. It's uh an honor for you to be here. You know, we've had some kind of uh conversations just to give you some more understanding about who I am. It's very interesting. We have very parallel paths, right?

SPEAKER_02 2:13

Right.

SPEAKER_00 2:14

Very parallel paths, and it's um working with the bridge, you know. That name that you said, what's your what's your spiritual name that was given to you?

SPEAKER_05 2:23

Um, it said nganga.

SPEAKER_00 2:26

Okay, nice. Nganga. I love it. And that is the bridge, right?

SPEAKER_05 2:30

Yes, it is uh trusted, the abbreviated version of it is a trusted bridge between eboga and the people.

SPEAKER_00 2:37

Nice, nice. And that's where you um went recently or not too long ago when you went to Eboga and you actually experienced the medicine.

SPEAKER_05 2:46

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 2:46

And oh, that's a that's a that that that's a that's a very big medicine. You know, that is uh just you know, I know we're kind of getting off script here a little bit, but because this was not the order. Exactly. I just got a question on that because I've done a lot of medicines and worked a lot in Peru and South America, and evolga is one that I have not experienced.

SPEAKER_03 3:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:12

And just tell me this in like briefly, maybe in like a a short sentence or paragraph, a couple of sentences. What was that like?

SPEAKER_05 3:23

Um man, people ask me that question. It is often difficult to formulate words around it.

SPEAKER_00 3:31

I can imagine.

SPEAKER_05 3:32

Iboga is like no other medicine. And prior to going, we were we were prepped a lot. We had a lot of conversations with one of the caller shamaness. What do you call a female shaman? Shamaness. No, they're a shaman. Yeah, they're still a shaman. One of the um one of the shamans there, she was prepping us a lot and she told us, you know, I don't care if y'all upset with mushrooms, ayahuasca's, the buofos, or whatever it is, a boga is going to be nothing like that. And so to clear your mind around what it's like. And when we arrived and we were in our first talk with the head shaman, which they call the Nima, the Nima, his advisement was expect nothing, which they say for every medicine, right? Right, right. But he was like, Look, I'm telling you, for real, for real. He was like, for real, for real, it is important with eboga that you release every single one of your beliefs. He said, You have to believe nothing.

SPEAKER_04 4:28

Beautiful.

SPEAKER_05 4:29

And he said, Whatever at the end of this, you can pick whatever beliefs back up. But for this medicine to work, you have to release all of your beliefs.

unknown 4:36

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 4:37

So being someone who serves mushrooms, that is that was my medicine that I was called to serve initially. I've sat with Boo Fob and ayahuasca plenty of times, and all of the things, all the above. My expectation, I they said not have any. Of course, I still had expectations because I'm human. Yeah, my expectation was to ingest the medicine, to feel a feeling, and then to go somewhere. And so I wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't going anywhere. And I say that this medicine is like no other medicine because it truly feels like you're having a conversation with an elder. It's very cut and dry. The messages are not abstract, there's no having to figure anything out and put it together.

SPEAKER_00 5:22

I like that medicine already.

SPEAKER_05 5:24

For real, I was like, I needed that. It's so it's very direct. Um, and the messages are so direct that you can't deny what you're being told. You can deny what you're being told, but it with the way that the medicine um interacts with your brain, you know for a fact that it is the truth.

SPEAKER_04 5:46

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 5:47

And it's not a truth you have to figure out. Like you literally asked, I asked, I said, why was my childhood like this? And the medicine said, Because your mother is who she is and your father is who he was. Right.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

I mean, it didn't get any more direct than all that. It doesn't get any more direct.

SPEAKER_05 6:03

So, you know, that's the difference. Well, you know, other medicines that ayahuasca was like, Well, let me take you on a journey.

SPEAKER_00 6:10

I'm just showing you. Let me let you figure this out while you're while you're getting this and help you understand and be very present with it. But I do like that. Talking to her. So, how long was it? Was it like a few days?

SPEAKER_05 6:24

Or uh so I was there for 12 days. Um, we did three ceremonies within three of Boga ceremonies within the 12 days, but we were the first African-American group to go to their village. Nice, and so we were also the largest group to ever go to the village.

SPEAKER_02 6:42

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 6:42

So this was their first time serving a group that large, so they had to do everything twice. So they did six ceremonies. No, we did three, they split us up in two, but in the course of that, they did some other um some other rituals for us, um, spiritual baths, spiritual saunas, detoxes, and and all sorts of things. So it was an entire, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:07

Yeah, it was comprehensive, everything. That's beautiful. And so that kind of brings us into like the first the first question of um uh when you got really started. Angel, I think you had it.

SPEAKER_06 7:20

Yeah, so you let me make this clear. I would say around your awakening, was that like around 2020?

SPEAKER_05 7:28

2019. So mine was like a trickle. It was like a trickle, trickle. Yeah. So it was like a little bit in 2016, and then nothing for a while, and then a little bit, and then nothing for a while, and then 2019, it was like come on.

SPEAKER_06 7:45

Yeah, what was going on in your life at that moment that it it when you were aware that it started?

SPEAKER_05 7:50

Um, so I wasn't aware that it started into a hindsight, right? It was hindsight, is when I was like, oh, that's what was happening. Right, right, right. Um, I was working a corporate job. I was a purchasing manager for a company that fabricated stone. Like, so we purchased quartz and fabricated countertops and all of that good stuff. So working for them, um, I was also in a relationship. Relationships are just catalysts for growth growth, growth, but the way that I'm designed, like the way that I'm designed, I need relationships in order to catalyze me. Like I had it has to happen through relationships. So I'm in a relationship. I'm absolutely miserable. It is absolutely the most toxic thing ever. This man is living in my house. I don't know how to get him out of my house. I hate my job. You know, I'm hating my job. Another parallel. Yes, absolutely. I was like, sir, you gotta get up out of here. Um, and I mean, overall, I'm miserable. I'm miserable, but also I'm doing something I love. So I started pole dancing in 2016. I pole danced professionally for 10 years, coaching, competing, coaching other people to compete, traveling, and things of that nature. So I'm like in the height of my pole career at the time. So there is joy. But um, I one of my poll coaches was a medicine woman and I did not know. Oh, wow. I've been working with her for two years. I didn't know anything about medicine, so I wasn't asking about medicine. But, you know, one day we had a synchronicity, and so I felt called to ask her about, I was like, I heard this word ayahuasca. Do you know anything about that? I asked her, she shows me her medicine drawer, which is full of things. Of course, it looked like stuff to me at this time because I didn't know what it was. And so um, I was so in I was in so much pain from the relationship that I was like, give me anything. Wow, I was like, I'll do anything. And she's like, Cool, you want to try some MDMA? I was like, sure. So um, I was already in the mental mindfulness, like I started listening to Rom Dice, I was reading Joe Dispenza, you know, was doing the intellectual mental things, but I didn't know anything about integration and being in my body and things of that nature. So it was around that time that I actually started to do things to actually feel present in my vessel, and then from then it was just to come beautiful.

SPEAKER_06 10:21

Yeah, it looks beautiful.

SPEAKER_00 10:24

That is, you know, they say when the pain to say the same outweighs the pain to change, you change bars. That that is something that that that is that is that is key. And when you got to that point and you made that change, what was it that you or when did you realize that hey, I'm going down this road and this path and I can't turn back? You know, did you was there a moment where you where you felt that?

SPEAKER_05 10:51

You know, is yes and no. Um when I think about those first years of my journey in hindsight, I was like sleep awake.

SPEAKER_00 11:04

Okay, okay, makes sense.

SPEAKER_05 11:06

I was awakening, but I was still so very sleep. Right, right. And it was uh my platform grew really quickly, but I was not not aware of what was happening.

SPEAKER_00 11:20

I was not aware of how to eat.

SPEAKER_05 11:23

What do I say? So I already had a poll platform, so I was accustomed to um visibility, right? But then one day I received when I was in Costa Rica, I received to start another page from scratch and start your healing stuff there. So the platform grew, but my ego grew with it. So I'm on my healing journey, but I'm thinking that since this platform is present and all of a sudden overnight I've got 20,000 followers and I blink and now it's 100,000 and I blink and now it's 160,000. Like I'm looking at it like, oh, I'm doing something. Like, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 11:57

That's natural though.

SPEAKER_05 11:59

It's like I'm doing something. So I what started to happen, I don't even know if this answers the question. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, maybe it doesn't. What started to happen is I would be saying these messages on my platform, but then it would be months later where I was like, oh, I was talking to myself. Been there, yeah. Every single message that I was giving, like I was so passionate about it. I was like, people just need to, they just why are they just in this? Oh, I am talking to myself, and this is who I am, and this is what I'm doing. Right. So it took me a minute to catch up to my own messages, and when I finally started to catch up, that's when I was like, oh, I'm locked in. Like, okay, I'm in here.

SPEAKER_00 12:40

Yeah. It's that authenticity. So once we begin to feel that authenticity and know it and feel it and be that, then all of a sudden everything begins to attract to us. And one of the things that I help people to understand is we were already born with everything that we need. We just have learned constructs. We've been learning conditioning over years from our society, our parents and our peers, the environments that we move in, that basically tell us that we're not what we truly are. And that's where the shadow comes from is from hiding that authentic self. And then when you start to become authentic, all of a sudden the light shines, all the tools show up, and then you become this person that's on this platform. That sounds like what happened with you. You know, for me, it was like um I went down that rabbit hole probably around 2011 when I learned you can't be spiritual and be egoic at the same time. Yeah. And I literally lost everything. I was homeless for 18 months and months, and then ended up living in my gym for uh for 10 months. And that's another parallel. So you were in the pole dancing, I was in the personal training. Yeah, I started off as an athlete in college playing football and then moved into actual conditioning, work for Home Depot, another one, uh, another corporate parallel and work with them. So, so many parallels, we got so your story is so intriguing to me.

SPEAKER_05 14:04

The athlete to medicine person line.

SPEAKER_00 14:08

Exactly. And that's when I learned it was like hmm, you can't keep straddling the fence. What happens when you straddle the fence? Yes, yeah, yeah, that's what I'm saying. So I had to make a choice, and for me, that was 2011, and I went full hard. I kept my gyms open, then I ended closing the gyms in 2017 and went into actual medicine work and healing, spiritual work, and helping people understand themselves, shadow work. Um, full time. And a friend of mine had a gym, and he was like, Well, I need your help, and of course, you always have the opportunity to go back to the old life. So I went back and then I said, Well, I'll do this part-time. And then 2020 hit, and I was like, I'm done. I'm going full-time into the the work that I'm here to design to do, and I'm gonna enjoy it.

SPEAKER_05 14:55

When I tell you these people and try to pull me back into pole dancing over, they're like, Can you come back? Can you just teach again, please? And I'm like, there's a there was a time where I I really felt the Circle War because of the love. I'm like, man, I love this. But I was like, I was like, why can't I do both? I don't know, but I can't.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Right. No, and it we're not supposed to. Again, that's just you building that that that bridge, and it's now looking back over the bridge and saying, hmm, I've crossed it. Do I need to go back or I've crossed it? Yeah. And that's just a a part of of life. It we always get tested because that's that nervous system, that psycho, that subconscious mind saying, Are you sure you want to go into this? Because we can take you back over here if you like to. And then you got to be consistent because consistency is what creates a change.

SPEAKER_03 15:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

And that's what allows that true identity to keep shining through. But you were shining through a long time ago. Right. Long time ago.

unknown 15:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 15:51

Just last week, I was like, man, I sure would like to go back and get on a pub. For the one time. Are you sure you don't want to teach anymore? Um, Angel, that makes me think about our conversation when I was like the um the hot girl to medicine woman. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That was funny. That's that should be point. Uh oh. You know, and there is uh, of course, such a thing as sacred beauty. You know, um tending to our vessels, being beautiful feels great, and beauty is attractive and things of that nature. But uh, like just think about what you said with straddling the fence, yeah. And even straddling the fence with that level of womanhood, like deciding the kind of woman that you're gonna be. We can't be both, right?

SPEAKER_06 16:43

Yes, indeed. Yep, and just seeing if you're seeking some kind of balance, or are you two over here and you still judging yourself in a sense, too, you know? Yeah, uh I like to talk about uncomfortableness because that appears so much, and we know that this journey is not always going to be love and life, the uncomfortableness is a part of our growth. And I want to ask for you what was something that you realized that was just like you don't mind sharing the realization about something about yourself that was very uncomfortable for you.

SPEAKER_05 17:31

Oh man, so many things I could share. I mean, it's uncomfortable being human in a body, just period and feeling all the things. Um what comes to me immediately is a spirit of comparison.

SPEAKER_06 17:55

That's right.

SPEAKER_05 17:56

Very, very uncomfortable to sit with and feel, knowing like knowing intellectually that this is not the way to be. Knowing intellectually that there is no reason to compare, that I am um that I am unique, like seeing my gifts, seeing the impact, it's like I see it, I see it, I see it, I see it, I see it, I see me, and still, yeah, and still hear this little voice is that comes in every now and again. And so then the it's so many layers of like internal judgment that come up because it's the it's feeling uncomfortable seeing myself compare, then judging myself for comparing, then you should know better, then why don't you have grace? But I shouldn't be doing this, but why am I still doing it? And I, you know, it's just the the discomfort of the constant internal dialogue around the things that it's like you know better.

SPEAKER_04 18:51

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_05 18:52

So why is this still happening in your mind? I mean, it was just this this morning, it was happening, yeah. Not necessarily about comparison, but something that I'm working through right now is continuing to ground my mind into what is real.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

Right.

SPEAKER_05 19:05

I when I was a little girl, I read a lot of fantasy books. Um, and you know, just think about what happens in some people's childhoods. You know, when we create stories around whatever our environment is doing and doesn't feel ideal, then we'll start to like fantasize and retreat into our minds and things like that. So it's been a journey of unretreating into what is unretreating, back up, back up, thank you. Out of like a fantastical way of of seeing my life so I can see what is real. Yes. Um, but now seeing the different ways in which I've supported illusions in my own journey. Yeah. And the way that I continue to look at, like I'll look at something and I'll see my mind start to create a story. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yes. Like, hold on, no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 19:54

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_05 19:55

And the discomfort of like, why don't you just stop doing that? You know.

SPEAKER_00 19:59

So you know that that's something when we're looking at the nervous system, that's the autotomic nervous system. That's your fight, flight, and freeze. That's what we kick into when we start to try to make change. Whenever we start to get to that uncomfortable place, we begin to have these experiences pop back up. And first it begins just in the mind. And then it begins to test us, and then we begin to react and go into our old patterns, and then we start healing those patterns, then it goes back into our minds, and sometimes it's in your mind just to show you that that's something you've already released. Go ahead and let it go. Yeah, it's just a thought process. It's I'm trying to get you to go back to that old self, but you're reprogramming the nervous system. Yeah, and that's something that's uh is a beautiful thing when you start to recognize it's like that means I'm making change. Yeah, yeah, so it's a beautiful thing.

SPEAKER_05 20:51

Yeah, this morning I said, I'm not gonna fight you. I was like, We've done this work, I'm not gonna fight you. And that is it.

SPEAKER_00 20:57

Yeah, don't fight it. Yeah, it's really just allowing it and observing it. And when you do that, you allow and you observe, literally, you start seeing the change right in front of you because all those thoughts that are coming up, they're just emotions that have been suppressed that want to be heard. Yeah, they want to be seen, they want to be acknowledged. So just sit back, acknowledge them, and observe them. And a lot of times they'll go through their own little process because what we do a lot of times, especially as children, we stop the process of the emotions. And we stop the process of the emotions. The emotions get stuck.

SPEAKER_05 21:30

Yes, we backlogged, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

We backlogged, and that goes into the body via the nervous system.

SPEAKER_06 21:35

Yeah, well, that reminded me um of your class that you just taught about uh the living bridge. Yes, and when we think about where we are and our emotional capacity, so not in a sense of saying what we need to measure, where our growth is when it comes down to that, but we do start to understand. That at some point we're gonna have to cross two different thresholds. And that part of us that was holding on to uh us in that comfort level in that comfort zone, we won't grow, so we gotta we gotta come out of that, right? Yeah, and I know your your book is going to be released at the end of the summer, Koanas. I have to get you a copy of that. I'm ready. Let me tell you, I started reading a couple of chapters of the book and I had to set the book down. It was one of them, like your conscious is just instantly changing, you know. And your book and certain chapters did that as well, you know. And that is that's such a gift to be able to pass that down, you know, to allow yourself to be open to receive that and it expands your knowing. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, so um, I'm so proud of you. Thank you. Yeah, I'm very proud of you. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 22:58

Yeah, I'm proud of you too, because this book right here, it's the truth. Yeah, I've read a couple of it. It's it's really good information, and just talking about those things of the old coming back and comparison, you know, when we start the spiritual journey and other people start the spiritual journey to something, and other people start the spiritual journey. Some people think it's about love and light and peace and all, I can escape all the things that I never liked before.

SPEAKER_03 23:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:26

But then all of a sudden, they start realizing when you start getting deep into spirituality, which is nothing but finding your most authentic self. And when you start dealing with who you are and all the stuff that's covered you up, you start to see a lot of things that can become uncomfortable. So, do you feel like the spiritual awakening can be uh kind of uh dysregulated for people or disheveling for people? Do you how do you how do you feel about that, especially, or what do you think about that concept and how would you help somebody move through that process if they're starting to feel uncomfortable like that?

SPEAKER_05 23:58

Absolutely. You know, it's interesting that you asked that question. I was just doing some, I went down a rabbit hole on this. So this was this was one of my rabbit holes. Um, because my curiosity was whether or not the nervous system needed to be regulated prior to a person doing shadow work, and what was the relationship between shadow work and regulation? Um, because going through Kendrick Lamar has a line in one of his songs that says, Look myself in the mirror, Amityville. I ain't seen nothing scarier. Burning around. Yeah, like I haven't seen anything scarier than myself. So when a person goes, you know, really chooses to get into the part of the path where they're not bypassing, I think about my own journey. It was a shock to my body, yeah, like a shock to my system to see myself to see myself.

SPEAKER_04 24:57

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 24:57

And I didn't know anything about regulating anything prior to me going into my shadow work. So I went into like deep lineage healing, very unregulated. And when I say, look, I'm making the side effects over here. For real. Life turned upside down, um, vision turned upside down the way I was seeing things, and it took me a minute to get my mind even back to a place of like just it's okay. Like, just it was some scary shit. Yeah, so you know, um, I don't even know if I'm answering your question, but you are definitely answering it.

SPEAKER_00 25:40

No, that's um, yes, you're answering it.

SPEAKER_05 25:42

I have curiosities rather than answers, right? So maybe you have answers. I don't know. But my um the questions I was asking myself was okay, so considering where we think about where the masses are, truly in a state of like mental, emotional, physical, physiological, physiological survival. Right, right. Um, where some people are at are actually um resource scarce, where they're living in actual different forms of scarcity. But then you also have people who are not physically living in scarcity, but they the scarcity programming is so deep.

SPEAKER_00 26:19

Right, yes.

SPEAKER_05 26:20

So then the question becomes okay, I know that in order to actually receive a level of healing, something in their life has to be regulated.

SPEAKER_03 26:34

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 26:34

Whether it be environment, mind, and things of that nature, but then some people's environments are not conducive to regulation. Right. So my, you know, that was my question around the I suppose it can't be a linear process, but having a container that is safe enough or regulated enough to do the shadow work, but then being in a container that's difficult to regulate in. So this is me asking you a question. Like, what are you? I don't know. This needs a question. You know, what do what do we do about that? Because that is that is a lot of people's reality.

SPEAKER_00 27:06

You're right. And what I would say is, first of all, to anybody that's out there that's listening to this, please go through the simple regulation processes first. Because, like Kawana said, she went through it not regulated. Um I went through it not regulated, and I lost everything because I wasn't ready for what I was seeing. Like you say, the Amineyville horror that you see. Sometimes, first of all, you would never think that I am that anyway. But when that mirror shows up and you see that in the mirror, how do you handle that? And that's a real question. Because guess what? If you do this work, you're going to see that version of yourself. And when you see that version of yourself, you need to be regulated. You need to understand the nervous system, you need to feel safe enough to say, I'm going to enter this. There's a whole program I do with quantum hypnosis that takes people into that space of their own emotions in their past, their past lives, uh, their past experiences, so that they can actually go into the emotion, feel the emotion, and allow the emotion to be observed and allow the emotion to then begin to communicate to them. It's kind of like with evolga and you go in and the ancestors start communicating with you. Well, we have systems in our body that want to communicate with us like the ancestors. And we just have to listen to them sometimes. And when they actually are listened to, they can go through their process, and the destabilization begins to stabilize. When you allow them to go through their process, every emotion, every experience has to go through its process. And for me, what I do is help people to, or when I would say if someone is going through something like this and they're in a position where they're in a place that is destabilized.

SPEAKER_03 29:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:08

It's number one, is learning how to create that sacred space and protective space with inside yourself. And there's a whole program that I actually teach people how to do that step by step, and it's really simple. And then what happens is what's on the inside is on the outside. I've been saying this for 10 years. Yeah. What you start doing, you start to change the identity of yourself and you start to change the expectation of the identity of the people that are in your space, and they begin to change. Highest consciousness always wins. If you stabilize yourself and you begin to work on your authenticity, then you begin to create the sacred space in you, your consciousness rises up. But lower consciousnesses that are of energies of lack, fear, anger, sadness, those energies are going to then connect with yours, and you will begin to raise them up. So for somebody in a situation like this, I would say, first of all, regulate yourself and then begin to see the identity of yourself differently, and then begin to see the identity of other people differently. That creates an authentic version of yourself, a vision of yourself that you can align to, attach to. And at that point, your outside begins to reflect your inside.

SPEAKER_03 30:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

That's the easiest way I can do it. And it sounds like, whoo, that can't work, man. My people did this, that, and the other.

SPEAKER_05 30:26

But that's exactly how it works. That is exactly how there's no other way that it works. It's just like that.

SPEAKER_00 30:32

The only way to do it. And it's um it's so powerful. And you take all the power back. And once you feel that, wow, I can actually do this, and just like we were talking earlier before we started the podcast, I started realizing what I'm thinking is actually happening. If I expect someone to be a certain way, they're going to be that way.

SPEAKER_05 30:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:52

And it happens real time now. I'm not talking about 20 days, I'm talking about seconds.

SPEAKER_05 30:57

Manifesting immediately.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

So it's like, whoa, wait a minute. Yeah. So you have to step back. And that takes nervous system regulation in itself because mine right now is reorganized into something that is beyond what I've experienced. But the only place you can get beyond what you've ever experienced is get out your head and get into your heart. The heart is the infinite source of knowledge, the brain is the finite source of knowledge. We have to stop thinking so much, and we have to start feeling more, especially us as men, and we need to do it in a safe space. Now, I'm gonna stop talking because this is your time. But I want to answer that question the way this that I do it. And I think you do it the same way. You just haven't put words to it yet.

SPEAKER_05 31:39

Yeah, because what you said, I was like, okay, that's what I'll be doing. Yeah, you're already doing it. Yeah, yeah, you know, it's um and thank you for that. Make sure y'all grab that clip. Um soundbite, soundbite. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's that's the one right there. But um, I you know, I work with a lot of impatient people, and that's the thing. People are impatient, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:05

The nervous system regulation takes time. Yes, your nervous system didn't get like this 10 minutes ago. This goes into the autonomic nervous system, it goes into the subconscious mind, it goes into program, and I start talking again. So let me stop. Look, somebody else just needed to say it.

SPEAKER_06 32:22

Yes, well, let me say this to piggyback off of that. I am talking to the people who just felt that because for me, I wanted to get to a place of peace very fast. You know what I'm saying? And so I knew that for me, I didn't know at the moment, but as I kept experiencing it, I felt like medicine fast-tracked it for me.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

It does.

SPEAKER_06 32:49

Yeah. And I got, I, I, I definitely, in hindsight, tried to skip certain processes. Yeah. Because I was forcefully trying to expand my consciousness when I was not ready and I didn't have the capacity to take what I would have been taking back down and to do with that information when they when they came to me, what was I gonna do with it? You know, and so I am giving my medicine right now with grace because when my my only child transitioned and I went through my awakening process, I was just like, who the hell would sign up for this? Who who I know you got to be lying, right? I know you I know I know I didn't sign up for this. Why would I choose it? Why would I choose it? You know, but um we know that when expanding our consciousness, expanding it into infinite, right? You're saying stop saying, stop with the finite into infinite consciousness, it continues on and on and on and on. You know what I'm saying? So um, so yeah, so to for you two that went through um and you we just had the conversation about that, I was just felt the need to say that based off of the people who felt like that, like whoo, yeah. So I definitely did try to push my things up and push past certain processes. I did the same thing, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:21

We all did, you know, and it's okay we had to learn because it's it's a process. And as we get into this and we go through that rushed process, we begin to learn that every step of that process is the destiny, every step is the is the is the beauty in who we are. And that's when when we start to say that, which is called presence. That's when that's when we begin to be on the same page. I mean I know it's in the it's in the book.

SPEAKER_05 34:54

Different words, different languages. Yeah, I just um very parallel, parallel with the experience of trying to trying to fast track it through medicine. Um and what I learned through that process, I'm telling my students, I was like, look, I effed around and found out. Right, right. I'm like, look, I found out so you don't have to. I'm telling you, it's not gonna work. Try if you want to, but I'm telling you, it does not work. Um when I was in that process, I knew that something was off when I was receiving the same messages and no news. I'm a I'm like, oh my god, something's wrong. Something's wrong. Okay, I need a money for the ceremony. I need to make my name. And then it's like same message. I'm like, okay, like a few weeks go by. And again, it's like the same message. I said, and I would literally be like, tell me something new. And it would be like, no.

SPEAKER_00 35:55

You gotta figure this out. That's the way it was.

SPEAKER_05 35:57

It was, I mean, it was when I went to Africa and sat with Evoga that Evoga was like, you're not going nowhere, you don't need to see no ancestors, you don't need to seriously was like the other people in the um the group, they were like, Yeah, I saw the moon, and I flew and saw this, and I had dinner with my ancestors, and I was like, nothing. Evolution was like, you're not going anywhere. What have you been told to do? Wow, and everything was like the past year, you have received exactly what to do. You're not going nowhere until you go home and do what you were told to do.

SPEAKER_00 36:31

That's it. Practice, practice, practice.

SPEAKER_05 36:33

Yeah, and that's just what it was. It was like, even the shaman, he was like, Wow. He was like, I have nothing to tell you. Seriously, he was like, I have nothing to tell you. He said, What do you think you should do? And I said, Everything that I was told to do over the past year and hadn't done. So it's like, you can't bypass the integration, you just can't bypass the physical work and the progress.

SPEAKER_00 36:54

You cannot, and it's and integration takes time. It's that's something that literally takes steps and practice of awareness and then doing because when we receive information, and this is the other thing the nervous system is not stabilized. When we receive the information, we just get the information. But once you start stabilizing that nervous system, you can begin to assimilate that information, you can begin to digest it, and then you can begin to apply it into everyday life. And this is what Kawanis is saying. She was given the message of what to do, she had to apply it to life. When she applies it to life, then it becomes embodied. When it becomes embodied, it becomes your truth. And that's when the healing begins to start and the change, and then the identity begins to shed, the old identity shares. Yeah, it's powerful. Yes, powerful.

SPEAKER_05 37:43

Such a funny journey.

SPEAKER_00 37:44

But I know, isn't it? You gotta just laugh about it sometimes. And the thing is, our souls chose this to go through that fast track, to go through that loop, to keep going back and forth to get the same answers and not do the same thing, go to someplace else. Yes, and that's what a lot of people do. That's chasing the peak state. Yes, and we gotta be careful with chasing peak states. We have to allow ourselves to integrate those peak states because most of us have already gotten plenty of peak states. We just need to integrate it into everyday life.

SPEAKER_06 38:13

Yeah, yeah. And I was one that kept wanting to leave my body to be able to touch and feel that sacredness, you know. But no, we can have that same feeling right here on earth, yeah, you know, and it's getting to it. So that's the work, y'all. That's um, and it it's it's forever going on. Yeah, so I also wanted to expand or expound upon Costa Rica. Yes, I see so many of um people on their journey they had over to Costa Rica. Yeah, yeah, and that was a part of that was a big part of your journey.

SPEAKER_05 38:51

Yes, that was the beginning for real, for real. The the beginning amongst many beginnings.

SPEAKER_06 38:57

One question I want to ask do you feel like when you traveled that that was something else that unlocked your consciousness as well?

SPEAKER_05 39:07

Yes, um, but again, is these questions and the topic that you chose is so very aligned. Okay, so very tapping. Yeah, because maybe two days ago, I was like, wow, that my whole I call it me being under ayahuasca's toolitch. I sat with ayahuasca maybe about 19 times within like 18 months to two years.

SPEAKER_04 39:30

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 39:31

And I was in such a deep, sunken place, like I couldn't hear my intuition. I didn't know I had an intuition. Wow. I didn't, I was there, like an NPC for real, for real. Just I felt like I was coasting through life. And so ayahuasca had to work with me to the point of even just getting me above water is why I needed so many, yeah, like so much work. So while I was under her tutelage, I was the other night I was thinking about how everything that happened in those ceremonies, I feel like I'm living it now. And the last ceremony I had with ayahuasca was 2022. Yeah, so I feel like now I'm I'm just thinking about the last time I saw that shaman, he looked at me, he said, You are healed. Wow. Yeah. And boy, no way, I was healed then. But you know, I always healed, like always healed. But he was just like, it's been a long journey. And um, and the journey was just beginning. Wow, is what it felt like. So, but I think about the things that he said to me. He told me I needed to go to Africa, he told me that I needed to heal so that I could serve my community. I had no intention of being a healer. He asked me if I wanted to be a healer. I said no. Straight up, no. I wanted to be an internationally renowned pole dancer. I wanted to dance with Chris Brown and Danae Eichel. That is seriously what I wanted to do. I wanted to be on stage. Like I'm a performer. I wanted to perform. And so when I told him I did not want to be a healer, he paused. This, you know, shaman, y'all know what y'all be doing. One thing that I love about um, one thing I really love about a shaman is that there's no attachment to the method at which the medicine is delivered. There's no attachment to the method at which the medicine is delivered, like the message is delivered. Yeah. And that's true. The shamans that I have experienced, I've only I've only sat under men, which I also find I prefer to sit under men. Just with the way that y'all deliver the medicine. It's very upfront. I like it like that. But um, very much so like a trickster energy as well, like reverse psychology.

SPEAKER_04 41:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 41:41

And so he taught he said to me, he said, if you don't learn what a healer does, he said, You need to learn what a healer does, because if not, then it's gonna affect your business.

unknown 41:53

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 41:55

And I was so attached to business. Like he knew what he knew what to say to me. And there was another ceremony where I, so this was all with um, I was the only person of color in just about any ceremony unless I brought somebody.

SPEAKER_00 42:11

Oh, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_05 42:12

Yeah, so I brought a sister in one ceremony, and she just had she was speaking in tongues, she had a joyful ceremony. She threw her waist beads off, she's running around. You know how black folks do when they get in the spirit. So she's she she just in the spirit, and she is causing a ruckus in these folks, in these white folks' ceremony, when everyone is just laid out, you know, just laid out on their mats, quiet, and she is going to town, and they don't know what to do with her. You know, they didn't know what to do with her, which was which was cool. So I looked at her, I said, sit down. And we're on the medicine, so I don't know why I said that. I was like, sit down. She was like, okay. And so the next day, the shaman was like, You said the right thing, but you didn't have a right to say that to her. I was like, okay. And he said, um, he said to me, She received her gifts. Why didn't you get yours? Oh I said, Not you playing off my comparison. Then I didn't know. Then I didn't know because he was trying to teach me a lesson. And so he said, She got her gifts, why you didn't get yours? And so we go into the final ceremony. I said, I'm getting my gifts. I was like, I ain't leaving this ceremony without getting my gifts. And I got my gifts, but he it's like what he was trying to get me to do was to see beyond slavery. Because he asked me, he said, um, he's like a French Egyptian. Uh, so he asked me, he said, Where are your people from? Who are your people? I was like, I don't know. He said, The problem is you don't know who you are. And I was like, Well, all I knew. Of you know, is what we're taught in history about us coming over to this country. I was like, Well, slave ships, he said no, he said, You need to see beyond that, and I still wasn't getting it because I had no reference for what to see beyond. So that's when he was like, Well, she got her gifts, why you ain't get yours? And then that just I asked, How do I get my gifts? You know, in ceremony, and then I just saw everything. So that led me into, I don't know if I answered your question. Yes, that led me into a deeper awakening, like when I could see beyond um the pain. Yeah, like seeing beyond that. Say it again. That's yes, that woke me up. You gotta see that.

SPEAKER_00 44:36

Seeing beyond the pain. You got to, you have to, because that that pain is that that emotion that that blocks us, that creates protective measures which won't allow us to see. And sometimes it's difficult to strip that down. So as a healer and as a shaman, we have to have compassion, but then we have to be very creative in our in our conversations so that people see things. But it it does work that that way. So when you were down there, did you get a chance to work with the shaman? And if you did, what assisting in ceremonies? How was that for you?

SPEAKER_05 45:12

Uh so it wasn't an assistant process. I was 100% impatient.

SPEAKER_00 45:16

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 45:18

100%. Very, very sick. But um, but I still was so under under his tutelage. Yeah. Getting there. We were there were 10-day processes. I did like four of the processes. Wow. And his style was he had a psychologist to come in as well. So he would teach for about an hour and a half before ceremonies, and then we would sit with cacao, tobacco, and then ayahuasca. So the way that he taught was me, um, you know, the teachings go with the medicine. Right. Yeah. I mean, it's like every medicine needs a teacher.

SPEAKER_04 45:58

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 45:59

Some type of teaching. So his teachings, everything that he would teach, it happened in ceremony. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:03

And so my like my awakening was just like and that's that that non-conscious brain awakening. So that's where it really sticks. I love it. I love it.

SPEAKER_05 46:14

Yeah. So it was constantly like as things were happening, I would remember, oh, he said that guilt was a choice. Okay. Oh, he said, you know.

SPEAKER_00 46:24

So just as uh I remember working in certain medicines, and I got a very similar epiphany, something similar to that, where I was told that suffering is a choice. And so many people choose to suffer. And sometimes when we choose to suffer, like living in the consciousness of a slave or from being from slavery, we're choosing to suffer that. Yeah. And sometimes what's happened is our ancestors are actually showing us that suffering so that we can release it so they can be freed on the other side.

SPEAKER_02 46:55

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 46:56

And it's so interesting, like how medicine will tell you and teach you and reiterate everything that another person has said. And sometimes you'll even hear things that you didn't hear.

SPEAKER_02 47:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:13

I heard this, and nobody else heard it.

SPEAKER_05 47:17

Listen, there were multiple instances where I swear I there was a couple in one of the Costa Rica processes, there was a couple present, and they actually were living in Costa Rica for a while to sit under the shaman and assist. The they're in ceremonies together. I've never met these people before. I'm next to the wife. The husband is on the other side of the room, and the husband is just calling my name. But he's like he's Hispanic, so come on ease, come on. And it's like this is going for hours, just hours. I'm hearing this man calling my name. And I was like, the shaman had already told me about saying something to people before. So I was like, I can't say anything. But I'm so distracted, and I'm like, is nobody gonna shut him up like in my head? I was like, is nobody gonna tell him to be quiet? And it went on for hours until the medicine was like, What did I tell you to do? When life is distracting, what did I tell you to do? I was like, Oh, I'm supposed to go inward. And then immediately his voice quieted. Yeah and later I asked one of the apprentices, I say, Did you hear that? She was like, No.

SPEAKER_00 48:32

That's something special, I tell you. That's that's something when we're teaching meditation to people. You have people that actually snoring or they fall asleep or whatever, and it's just like you have to learn to say so deep in your process that you don't hear anybody else. Yeah, you know, and it's uh it's a it's a practice. You definitely have to learn to practice that. So yeah, that's that's pretty cool.

SPEAKER_06 48:56

That's beautiful. And when I just listened to you and read in the book with the integration, I found that story to be hilarious too. When I was reading that, I was um visualizing and I'm like, and then when you get to integration and they telling you they didn't hear it either, like you're like, what? Yeah, I didn't hear that, you know. Right, yeah, yeah, right. But integration. So I've been in different countries where you would need a translator to interpret when you're telling what you've experienced. For you, what do you feel like when it comes to integration? And I know you're a medicine woman. What do you feel like for the people who want to skip that process? People want to come and get their medicine and then they want to be gone. And you can even find some people who don't want to hear anything afterwards, you know, and it's like, but they'll come to all your retreats, you know what I'm saying? They whatever you put out there, they back again and then they're back again and they're back again. But a lot of people will skip the coaching or the further classes and things like that, not realizing that that is also a part of integration. Absolutely. Yeah. So what would you say for those who are chasing the peak states but aren't incorporating integration as part of it?

SPEAKER_05 50:21

You're in for a bumpy ride. Honestly, honestly, um, you're in for a bumpy ride. Something that I just shared with one of my class, I teach a Sunday class um called The Path of the Healer. And something that I shared with them yesterday was that as we're doing these practices, like even if not medicine, doing the breath work practices, doing the meditations, doing anything, anything that is clearing energy. Um, as we're clearing this energy, we're creating more space for more awareness to come in. And so once the awareness comes in, then you cannot help but see what you see. Like whatever is there. Even if you think that you don't want to see it, the awareness is present. So, in some way, shape, or form, this pattern is going to make itself known in your experience, seeking its own recon resolution or disillusion, rather, because there is now enough awareness present because you created space.

SPEAKER_06 51:17

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 51:18

So I let them know I'm like, look, the you have to do the integration processes, otherwise, these patterns are gonna drag you around. Because now, now that you have become more aware, there is nothing that you can do about this energy now moving in a direction that is seeking to be resolved. And so it's gonna attract whatever it needs to into your experience, whoever it needs to into your experience, or rather, you're attracting it, you know, for the sake of the resolution of this thing. So you can either do the integration on purpose, you know, you can do it on purpose um to kind of be more so in a conscious choice, yes, um, place of how, or just have a little more interaction with uh conscious interfacing with this, or you can let it drag you around. But either way, if you're doing the things, you become more aware, and now stuff is gonna start to shake up. Yes, indeed.

SPEAKER_00 52:15

For sure. Yes, indeed. That is for sure. So when we talk about the um peak states or the medicines, what type of things do you do to help you ground once you come out of one of these peak states or deep meditations or deep awareness, even with the integration process? Because once we become aware, it becomes very apparent that we gotta make some changes. Yeah. And that becomes a choice when we make those changes. So, how do you actually ground yourself enough to say, okay, it's time for me to make these deep changes, or how do you ground yourself coming out of a medicine ceremony so that you can then be prepared to receive what comes into that excess space and then apply it to your life?

SPEAKER_05 52:58

Man, I know I know people's processes are different. Um, I'm an astrology person. So I'm an astrology person, so I look to part my thing is solitude.

SPEAKER_04 53:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 53:11

I need I need a long time. Um, I need to only hear my voice. That has been such a lesson for me on my journey. Anytime that I have listened to anyone, anytime I have put anyone else's guidance above my own, I have effed around and found out. Just, you know, absolutely. So for me, I have to take days of stillness, um, social media detoxing, being on my phone as little as possible. Even when we don't think that what we're seeing and what we're ingesting through social media is having having an effect, the more aware you become, then you really can feel what's happening when you're looking at someone else's words, like when you're listening to someone else's voice. So for me, it's just really important that I only hear myself for a while.

SPEAKER_04 54:01

Perfect.

SPEAKER_05 54:01

Um, and then I'm able to really hear my messages and receive the medicine in purity rather than other things coming in and distorting what I receive.

SPEAKER_00 54:11

Definitely, because you know, your voice is the most powerful voice of reason to you. And that is the voice if you just stop and say, Hey, you know, just ask yourself. I want everybody out there in the listening world to do this. Close your eyes for just a second, I'll keep them over, it doesn't matter. But just ask yourself this question silently to yourself. What is my name? Listen to the voice and whose voice was that that answered that question. Most likely it was your voice. Because that's the voice that's of reason. So when you listen to yourself, you literally begin to hear what's on the inside, and you will listen to what's on the inside. So perfect, perfect advice. Go on is telling.

SPEAKER_05 54:56

Yeah, same with yourself. It made me think about how you said we already have everything that we need. My mother, when I was my family, is very Christian. Um, but they are the my mother has no choice but to accept me because I'm her best daughter. I am the best daughter out of three. The life insurance policies are under. She has no choice but just to accept the choices that I make for my life, you know. Oh, yeah. So, you know, Christian or not, but as she, as I was getting deep into my medicine work, she was just like, What is that? What are you doing? Why are you doing so many things? And she would constantly tell me, God told me to tell you you have everything you need inside of you. God told me to tell you you have everything you need. And at this, at that point, I was like, But I need that mushroom. But I need a little bit of this and a little bit of that. And you know, it was as I began to really get more deeply into just listening to myself, I was like, Oh, she was right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 55:58

That's so true.

SPEAKER_05 55:59

The wisdom of a mother, the wisdom of a mother, mamas be knowing sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 56:03

Like soon, but sometimes God be speaking to mommas. That's that's what we gotta realize.

SPEAKER_06 56:09

Yeah, yeah. On on that note, something more personal, similar to your experience. Before I went to Peru, my mother and my sister didn't want me to go to Peru. And my sister actually started crying, and she kept saying she didn't want me to go because she had a dream that I was going to stay there, and she couldn't imagine life without me. I she had been protecting me my entire life, and she didn't want me to not be anywhere where she could come and help me. And um, my mom was thinking that I was involved in some kind of woo-woo. That she was telling people, I don't know if she's in a code or not. I don't know what's up with these people that she'd been hanging around with and things like that, right? So I I decided to, I said, let me bring her around, my shaman. Let me, you know. So I brought her to a drum circle, a drum circle. And so this was her first time, and um, she was sick at the moment. And I believe uh there was another shaman here who had actually from Peru, um, um, a shaman um morrow, who had actually seen that my mother was sick. He had already seen her orgfield that she was sick. She didn't know that like the day before I went to Peru, she ended up in the hospital and was there for almost a month. Oh wow. But he had already seen that she was ill and he had wanted to do some work on her and on her. And when I when I was on my way home, she said in the car, she said, that's gonna be your husband. And I'm like, what are you talking about? Yes, yeah. I'm like, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_00 57:54

We talking about Mara or was you talking about Derek?

SPEAKER_06 57:57

I'm like, Yes, so she was she was saying it about Sean Ron, and I'm like, she don't, you don't even know this man. You just got in the car with me to come here and like, lady, what are you talking about? Like, you sound cook crazy, right? But the mom must be knowing my mama called that out already.

SPEAKER_03 58:13

Yeah, she did.

SPEAKER_06 58:14

Didn't know what this meant, and and it was think then had no clue what I was around or anything, but she kind of called that out. She did, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:23

Interesting. Star-crossed lovers. Yeah, you never know, you never know how things uh end up. I've been working with Angel and really teaching her and guiding her for a couple years prior to and just kind of came out, and it's interesting. I was over in Egypt and was in a buffo uh ceremony, and came out of the buffo ceremony, and all of a sudden I'm seeing her her face and she smiled. I'm like, what in the world is this? Why is Angel in my vision? This is Angel Corner.

SPEAKER_02 58:55

I don't know I don't know you.

SPEAKER_00 59:00

But then she popped up again. I was like, Well, okay, wait a minute. I must need to listen. So I said, let me listen. And then it was just the energy was like, there's a cohesiveness that needs to be visited, and you need to begin to uh open your mind to finding out more about her. That's okay. So fine. Then we did mushrooms the next night, and here she comes again. Now I'm just like, okay, now I'm invited. Come on in, let's talk. And that's when it was kind of shown to me that this is your person.

SPEAKER_05 59:30

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 59:30

And you need to uh pursue, and if she is open and willing, then everything will work out. And it did.

unknown 59:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 59:39

Very interesting.

SPEAKER_06 59:40

Wow. I love love. Yes, gotta love it, gotta love it.

SPEAKER_00 59:44

Yeah, yep. So when we think about um when we go through these journeys, sometimes they can be uncomfortable. How do you help people um work through that discomfort instead of running from it?

SPEAKER_05 59:58

Oh man.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:04

Kind of a you're saying like during a medicine situation or just whenever it's just the whole awakening process, you know, it gets uncomfortable. And when it does get uncomfortable, you know, what would you say to do? And I know you said earlier, like when you come out of your journeys, it's pause, it's be still and listen to yourself. But if someone's going through um the journey awakening, and they're not ready to embrace that discomfort, being that uncomfortable stage. How do you help them with that and keep them from running from it? Because sometimes, you know, it's like that F around to find out, you know, it they can't.

SPEAKER_05 1:00:39

Yeah, honestly, honestly, it's with that energy. I'm not a gentle teacher. Oh so you got a mirror in front of you. Yeah, I think that's why I like to sit under men. Like honestly, I really think that that is why I like to sit under men. Because I'm not like a no in my nervous system. You're not gentle, man. Hey, no, you can say a lot of women. Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:06

I'm graceful.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:07

Graceful and gentle are not the same. I I give a lot of grace.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:11

Exactly. So you know, not gentle, yeah. Yeah, I can accept that. I can accept that. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:20

Yeah, I honestly truth is my medicine. Yeah, yeah, it's it's the truth. So just bars. Yeah, it's it's okay if it's not comfortable. You know, I let them know it's okay if it's not comfortable and it's not gonna be comfortable. Um you gonna barbecue or home noodle? You wanna do a bar and you wanna get a little bit more? Six generations in Atlanta. Honestly. I don't know. So that's hilarious. Yeah, I honestly, I just keep it very, very real. Yeah, I keep it real. You know, giving giving grace, let them know that this can take as long as they want it to take. There's no rush. So, you know, that's where the grace comes in. It's their process. I all of my students know I let them know you don't have to do anything. I say you can do whatever you want to do. Yeah, but I'll tell you what it is. Yeah, that's you know, giving everyone choice. I think that a lot of the discomfort, I'll say, yes, from what I've experienced, a lot of the discomfort is in battling with these aspects of stuff that feel like you have to be doing something. Yeah, and that feels like it's not a choice. Things feel better for people when they when they know that they are choosing this. Yeah, exactly. So if it can be chosen discomfort rather than forced discomfort, then um, you know, I lean into putting the choice in their hands. Now you can choose to experience, you can choose to feel this and get beyond it. And it's like, okay, I can sit with this because it's my choice.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:06

No, that's that's great advice, is when it comes down to choice and you you're choosing to move through something, whether it's discomfort or not, and not running from it, that is a choice that you are ready to change. And when you're ready to change, you're gonna change. Yeah. Like I say, when the pain to stay the same is more than the pain to change, you want to change. Yes. And so if when you're in that discomfort, then make the choice to sit through it. Because the discomfort is part of the process, and we gotta go through the process. You know, we can't stop the process, we gotta go through it.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:41

Yeah, and I'll let them know I'm like, hey, you can hit it in this lifetime or the next.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:45

Yeah, you know, it's no we're infinite beings anyway.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:48

Absolutely, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:48

So it's no, it's no hurry. No hurry at all, because we're gonna keep doing it over and over and over again.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:54

Yes, indeed.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:55

In some in some way, form, or fashion. Yes, indeed. So just learn to enjoy every step. I say, make your next step your best step. Yeah, yeah, and enjoy the step that you're taking.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:06

And see how it's different. Look at it in a different way.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:09

Yeah, yeah. Well, those are even conversations I've had with myself. There's some things that I felt come up that were rather uncomfortable. And I was like, I'll do a next lifetime. And then they got that choice, right? Yeah, but then it comes up, it's like, oh, you thought you thought you weren't gonna handle it, you're gonna handle this right now.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:26

Yes, and it's funny because when you when you do face it straightforward like that, you've acknowledged it, now you've actually opened it and it softened. Yeah, and then now your innate takes over, and next thing you know, you're going through it like, uh, yeah, it wasn't as bad as you thought it was gonna be. Exactly. So that's a key thing. Once you become aware of something and you basically just open your mind to see it and to confront it, to be aware of it, you soften the feeling of the discomfort that you thought it had. And then that process can actually just move on its own. It's amazing how we work, we're very brilliant organisms. The human body, the human mind, the spirit, the soul is so powerful and so expansive we can't even imagine it. And then we can start just looking at ourselves and seeing that expansiveness and that ability. We can get through anything.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:22

Yes, for sure.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:24

Oh, for sure, for real. Oh, I just want to take a moment to thank the most high for empowering us all with everything that we need so that we may be a vessel. I am so grateful and so thankful for you, Kawanis, also known as Zen, for your work, for you being a medicine woman, for you doing that inner work and coming back and being a teacher and embodying all of these things and exuding it from what's on the inside is on the outside. So I thank you for everything that you are. And I am just honored. Like you just continue on. May you soar my sister. May you be so much. Listen, I'm gonna speak life into you. Do you hear me? Yes. Yes, I'm gonna speak life into you. You, you, you there. Yeah. I'm proud of you. Yeah. Any reflection that you would like to leave us with? Well, let me ask you this first.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:26

Let people know how they can get in contact with you.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:29

Yes. Yes. So my website is www.zenoasis.net. Uh, you can find me on all social platforms at Koanis, K-A-W-A-N-I-S.lison. And you can also purchase my book, What Was Planted Here Before I Arrived? A Journey of Reimagining Your Patterns via my website or Amazon if you're international. Yes. Beautiful book. That's all.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:54

Yeah. Now I'm sorry I didn't mean to cut you off. I just wanted to make sure people can get in contact with you because you are a wealth of information and an excellent teacher that can definitely help people through these liminal stages. Liminal means we're in between. Yeah. And we're trying to get from one place to the next. And Kawanis is a great teacher, a great soul to help you to do that. And she's going to be real. You know, that's the beautiful thing. I love that. Yes, indeed. I love it.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:22

Real is the best way to be. That is my closing message. Real is the best way to be. Say it.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:26

That is it.

SPEAKER_05 1:07:27

If it's not real, then what is it? Come on now.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:30

Say this. Exactly. What is it? What is it?

SPEAKER_06 1:07:33

Yes. All right, Shama Ra, close us out.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:36

All right. Well, I want to say thank you all for listening. Kawanus again. It's a pleasure. So many parallel paths. Oh my goodness. It's it's almost it's synchronicities. I love them. It's it's uh a scary, beautiful thing at the same time. But thank you for joining us. And listeners, thank you for joining us. Again, if you would like to follow us, you can follow us at oracletstouch.com or you can go to shamanra.com, which is a new website where I actually explain the whole Living Bridge program. And I actually am coming out with a book on April the 6th. I'll be co-authoring with nine other authors over the world, and it's called New Earth Leadership, and it is uh brought together by Livia Devi, who is a uh chairman of the seventh dimensional Octurian Council of Light. Beautiful soul, beautiful energy. Um, and this book is powerful. It is a framework for living in the new earth. So check it out when you get a chance. We'll be doing some book tours later on this summer. I will be dropping my book, which is called The Living Bridge. The chapter in the book New Earth Leadership is called The Living Bridge. So you can find me there and all my information. Uh, if you'd like to find Angel, she can be reached at Stretch with Angel. Stretch with Angel on all platforms. Yeah, and mine is Oracle's Touch on all platforms or Shaman Ra on all platforms. Thank you all again for joining us.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:04

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Many blessings, everyone. Take care.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:10

Welcome to Awakening Cosmic Souls Podcast, season two.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:14

Where spiritual practitioners share their perspectives and practices, shaping new earth living.