Sovereign Grace Bible Church
These are the sermons and teachings of Sovereign Grace Bible Church in Biggsville, Illinois. We exist to fulfill the Great Commission through the Great Commandment within Gospel Community.
Sovereign Grace Bible Church
The Biblical Blueprint for Intergenerational Ministry
What if the modern church has overcomplicated ministry by segregating people into age-specific programs, when Scripture actually points to a more integrated approach? In this eye-opening exploration of intergenerational ministry, we dive deep into our second church distinctive at Sovereign Grace Bible Church.
Most church growth experts would warn that without specialized children's programming, young families won't attend. Yet we discover that throughout Scripture, from Moses gathering all Israel to hear God's Word to Paul directly addressing children in his letters, God's design includes all generations worshiping together. This isn't about making church unnecessarily difficult—it's about recognizing that God's Word is for everyone, regardless of age.
Drawing from Titus 2, we unpack what biblical men's and women's ministry should look like. Rather than entertainment-driven programs with bacon and motivational speakers, Scripture presents a model where older believers intentionally invest in younger ones, teaching them to live godly lives. These relationships aren't based on rigid structures but on the simple principle of deliberately doing spiritual good to someone to help them become more like Christ.
The beauty of intergenerational ministry is that both parties benefit. Older believers offer wisdom and perspective while younger ones bring fresh energy and questions. When a twelve-year-old naturally converses with an eighty-year-old after service, something precious happens that our age-segregated culture rarely experiences.
Christianity was never meant for individualists. We're called to journey together down the narrow path, both following and leading. While our approach may not yield rapid numerical growth, we're playing the long game—building a church where faith passes from generation to generation, creating transformation that spans decades rather than mere moments.
Ready to experience church as a multi-generational family rather than a collection of demographic segments? Join us as we pursue faithful ministry that transcends age barriers and creates lasting spiritual legacy.
Lean. We are currently in an eight-week series on our eight distinctives as a church. These are the guiding principles that define who we are and how we worship and operate as a church. If all of us were to pass away 10 years from now, the idea is that all of the new people that have come in 10 years would not change the church because the train tracks have been set. So this helps us, because what naturally happens we said this last week what naturally happens is we drift no one, like no one drifts into having a six pack. Like it just doesn't happen. Like no one. No one drifts into eating raw broccoli my wife maybe a little bit, but like it's just not natural. We have to create an alignment, a boundary, a system upon which we say here is where we stand and we will faithfully continually stay here, no matter what, if 10 years from now.
Speaker 1:These are unpopular topics and people say, oh, pastor, like it'd be way better if our church, our church would grow so much more if we didn't have this principle or that one. We just tweaked it a little bit. We will say no, thank you. These principles are not opinion. We have, as best as we can, said what does the Bible say a church must and should look like, which is why we began with our first distinctive last week of expository preaching. We went over the multiple different ways you can approach a sermon and why we at Sovereign Grace Bible Church will practice expositional preaching for the most, 95% of the time that we preach sermons here at this church. It's because we believe that when the Bible's open, god speaks and that if I wrote you a letter, right. Imagine I write my wife a love letter, right, I have done that before and in a long time, so that's condonation on me. But imagine I write my wife a love letter and she says oh yeah, I read it and I'm like perfect, like what'd you think of the letter? And she goes well, the eighth sentence is really all I care about. In that one you talked about how we've been together forever and we're going to be together forever. And I just gave me the warm and fuzzies and I said, well, what about the rest of it? I wrote this on purpose to you and the beginning kind of builds up to it and this loving moment is a peak. But like I would be frustrated as a human being if my wife only focused on one small aspect of what I communicated to her. Imagine God looking at us and we're like, okay, god didn't know what he was talking about when he wrote Job. Okay, job's way too long, like we should do, like a three-sermon series on Job, and we'll just generalize it and call it how to Deal with Suffering in Life, and imagine God saying no, no, no. Every single word that was written I spoke.
Speaker 1:So the necessity of expository preaching comes from 2 Timothy 3.16, that all of Scripture is God-breathed. Now, in light of that, we have to decide how do we do ministry as a church. How do we do ministry? The highlight today, our second distinctive, is called intergenerational ministry and we'll explain what all that means and unpack it, because people can have opinions over here and use that same term and be way over here and way over there. So we'll be very specific because we're setting a foundation where, two years from now, when you have a young believer who's in the church and they're wanting to know about our church, you can take them through our eight distinctives and say listen to this sermon, go over these questions with me next week. So we're going to set this foundation well, hopefully. So read with me Titus, chapter 2, verses 1 through 8 is going to be our primary text. We'll launch into that in a moment, but I'm going to read God's holy word first.
Speaker 1:Paul says Teach what accords with sound doctrine. Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love and in steadfastness. Older women, likewise, are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands. That the word of God may not be reviled. Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works and in your teaching show integrity, dignity and sound speech. That cannot be condemned so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.
Speaker 1:There are lots of opinions about men's ministry and women's ministry Like what should they look like? What should they sound like? What should they act like? Do we have to make sure that we have a motivational speaker for the men and lots of bacon? Is that necessity? And it's like no, bacon's nice. Most people like bacon, except for Addie, but for the most part. We have these things that are niceties that we end up making necessity.
Speaker 1:And you'll say we're developing a women's ministry model here's what it looks like. And people say, well, that's not going to be the most effective because you're not going to get 70 women at it. To which we would say, we don't care about getting 70 women, we care about caring for the seven women that are going to come. Well, and so today is about ministry done well, not trying to get the most people in the building, not trying to just grow this thing out of nowhere, trying to keep everyone entertained. How do we make sure people's souls five years from now are in a better place than they are today? We don't want to do church as it's always been done, according to the American standard. We want to look at all of church history, all of the Bible, and say what's the most faithful and, no matter the consequence, hold to that. So one of the things we'll begin with is children, because children are a hot topic today.
Speaker 1:Let me tell you something. I went through the SEND Network assessment. I went through a bunch of church planter stuff. I've read lots of church planter books and I'm here to tell you if I told somebody we had a church plant and we didn't have like a world-renowned kids director with this just like aesthetic, effective kids ministry during the service they would say you're never going to have young families Like they need that, you're not going to make it. And I've actually had comments like that made to me to which I first off replied okay, we don't have a building for that, that's not even like, unless we're going to put them all in the parking lot and to say like stay safe, kind of like. There's no option of that, realistically number one but number two. Even if there was an option of that, we would restrain ourselves.
Speaker 1:Now here's what I'm not saying. I'm not saying children's church is evil. I'm not saying children's church is unbiblical. What I am saying is I do not believe the Bible would classify a children's church as the most helpful in all contexts. I am happy and glad there are churches that have that because there are parents and families that desire that and want that. Praise the Lord. May they grow, may they prosper, may they become more biblical and grow over time.
Speaker 1:At this church we are intent on raising family shepherds, that the rule of 168 is that my one hour with your child over a lifetime is less than one percent of the time that you'll be able to impact your child. Do I want to pour into your child? Yes, more importantly, I want to pour into you Because if I can get you to understand God's word and God's word changes you you will change your children. Do that. It is a multiplication process that is not seeking to grow super wide, but is seeking to grow super deep so that 50 years from now praise the Lord, hopefully I'm still here we'll be able to look back and Jason will say look at my great grandchildren that are still in the faith. Look at my son, who's a family shepherd and took care of his children when I didn't have that. We are looking for transformation that is not aesthetic according to the world's definition. You know what no one wants to hear how to lose 100 pounds in five years. No one wants to hear that. What I do want to hear is how to do it in six weeks. If you got a pill, you got a process, I don't eat for 40 days great, I'll do that. Don't tell me the five-year plan.
Speaker 1:And what we miss in leadership, in our families, in the church, in our ministry. What we miss is we very often this is a quote from somebody, I don't remember who we very often overestimate what we're going to get done in the short term. We're like, oh, we're going to do all this in a year. Like we, very often we overestimate what we're going to accomplish in a year, but we drastically underestimate what we can do over decades. This church is not a sprint, it's a marathon that one day will be handed off like a baton to the next generation. And if we don't take responsibility to train them, who will Don't take responsibility to train them, who will?
Speaker 1:In Deuteronomy 31, as Jason said in the kid sermon, there is this moment where Moses gathers the people to read the law. Let me tell you something the Ten Commandments no, kid's, like man, this is so fun to listen to. I just can't wait to learn the Sixth Commandment. The Fifth Commandment was so fun this week. That doesn't happen, okay, unless you got a really good teacher. That's not me. So why do we have this moment where the law, god's word, is about to be preached, explained, read, exhorted from, and you see women and men and children and sojourners? That means the people that are just traveling through, the people that don't actually live here, right, like it's when we have like visitors from Florida or North Carolina and Dan Ashton's like look at us, we're growing, we're getting people from five different states here and you're like that's not actually true.
Speaker 1:Why were the children not put in a separate area? Do you think children were less disobedient and disruptive 6,000 years ago? 8,000 years ago? I'm here to tell you they weren't okay. Instead of throwing blocks, they just threw rocks. Okay, it was still madness to raise children, because you're a sinner raising little sinners and they have no self control and you have self-control. Okay, the context is not that different.
Speaker 1:But we like to try to make that and like scapegoat it like no, no, they had different attention spans back then. Like I don't mean nothing, you know what they didn't have back then Air conditioning, tennis shoes, a car. Okay, you know how bad a toddler would complain as you try to ascend up to Jerusalem singing the Psalms of Ascent. Like no, three-year-olds like eh, like they're all like oh, we've been walking for days Like it's not happening. Why are their children listening to Moses preach God's word? Because God's word isn't for 18 and older. God's word is not for 12 and older. God's word is for all. And so, in light of that again, we don't condemn the idea of segregating and go and learn a lesson.
Speaker 1:In fact, at this church the vision is that hopefully, eventually you guys can pray about this we'll have a nursery and we'll have someone to direct it, because we have nobody right now unless Jason can do it, and I don't think he wants to do it we have nobody to direct a nursery currently to do. We have nobody to direct a nursery currently, but the idea is that we'll have a nursery eventually and even a toddler room for three to five-year-olds so that parents can be trained on how to train their children to sit in service. I've had many people say well, that's not fair, that's ridiculous, you can't expect a six-year-old. I'm here to tell you the government expects that your six-year-old sits in class all day and you know what they do. They sit in class all day and you know how many adults there are per children, like one to 30. Now we have a lot of children, so we're not at that ratio, but I'm here to tell you that children are way more capable than you think. Now I will say my children's favorite sermon on Sundays is nevermind, it's always the kid's sermon and that's okay. We're training them that this is for you. This is not like adult church, and one of the passions of my heart with that is I grew up when I first became a pastor six, seven years ago.
Speaker 1:I was at a mega church and I was the youth and young adults pastor and there was a middle school class during service. Do you know what happened? All of the high schoolers would sneak into the middle school class so they could play on their phones, and college kids too. I mean, it was outlandish how hard it was to create order. And you know what happened. Whenever we end up, eventually cut that program and we give middle schoolers back to their parents, the parent looked at me and said what do you want me to do with my child? And I remember again, I'm 25 at the time, so I'm like well, I got a brand new baby, so I don't know. Parents, figure it out. I'm sorry I don't have better encouragement Now.
Speaker 1:We've had many times during just this church plant where we've been able to come along, family shepherds and mothers in different contexts and say we are here for you. Sometimes the single mother comes in and she has multiple children and she needs help. Guess what we're going to do. You're going to see that in a service, and help Guess, what we're not going to do when there's a crying baby in the back is everybody look back. Okay, that's against the rules. I got you, don't worry, I got you. And all the mama said amen. That's the only part. The I got you, don't worry, I got you. And all the mommas said amen. That's the only part the moms are going to remember. This time we are going to be a church where the generations mix. The Lanes and the Martins aren't here.
Speaker 1:But one of my favorite moments three years ago in ministry was this moment where I saw this middle school boy wearing up to this 80 year old man and give him a giant hug. And they're not related and you know what they did. They talked for like five, ten minutes. You know what doesn't happen in the average cultural context today, that you know what happens. Often, when I'm in public with my children, many people will talk to me, talk to my wife. Not many people talk to my children. Why, well, we're not doing? The children should be seen, not heard, concept. We're not there, but we're not far removed from it.
Speaker 1:So instead of a church service where we selfishly say I don't want to hear noise, I don't want to have distractions. I don't want to have distractions, I don't want to have anything. I want to be able to just focus on the sermon. We say no, no, no, no, no. Your life is not about you. Your life was given to you to give away, and the example of that and the proof takes, for that is called Jesus, who did not hold on to his life but rather gave it for us. My dear friends, if we could, at least one hour a week, do that for small children, for young families, for old families, if we could get to know each other to where it's normal for my five-year-old to have a conversation with you, that is a win for the kingdom, because my children then don't look at you and say the older people sit over there and the younger people sit over here. You could have an impactful influence on my children if you would just realize that this moment is not just about consuming, but it's about giving away. We come to worship God and to serve.
Speaker 1:So the question is Deuteronomy 31,. Why are children there? Because they're a part of the body. It is expected that they will be there and it's expected that there'll be children who need to be disciplined and coached and encouraged, and that we will support parents in doing all of those things. One of my favorite texts for this is actually Ephesians, chapter six. My children have this super memorized. Okay, ephesians six one through four Children, obey your parents and the Lord, for this is right. Honor your mama and dada, first commandment, right, we go through the whole thing.
Speaker 1:What we have to remember is Paul is writing a letter to whom? A church. In this same paragraph he addresses the fathers, which we don't think anything about. And in the same sentence of this letter that's supposed to be read to the entire church, he speaks directly to children. So, my dear friends, the early church had children in it to the degree that in a sermon, in biblical teaching, they were addressed. So we have to learn in our context what does that look like? Because if this is the example we're given in context, then we shouldn't say children are not allowed.
Speaker 1:So again, what we want is this balance where a person comes in and they don't feel condemned for dropping their baby off in the nursery or their toddler off in the toddler room, but also where we don't like stop. I've been to this kind of church where, like they stop families at the door and say, no, no, children go that way. And you're like, no, no, no, no, no. Like we're going to, we're going to sit together Like it's okay. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no. Like that baby will make noise, like you will put that baby in the nursery. We will never become that church.
Speaker 1:Intergenerational ministry is a necessity, not a nicety. We saw that from the Old Testament text here, where one generation shall commend your works to another and shall declare your mighty acts. It is a responsibility of the congregation for the older generation to be pouring into the younger generation biblical truth, showing them who God is, but not only that. Both generations need each other and have something to give. Paul is speaking to young Timothy in 1 Timothy 4.12.
Speaker 1:It says let no one despise you for your youth. What does that mean? It means that it's very easy when you're older to despise younger people that try to tell you anything. You're like you don't understand. Like I had to go to school both. You're like you don't understand, like I, like I had to go to school both ways, upside down up the hill, backwards in the snow, okay. And you got your little wee pod doing your thing. Okay, I don't want to hear it and we can miss pride in that and say no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1:I learn from my children on a weekly basis. Now, what I don't mean by that is I sit at their feet and have them open the Bible or tell me all of their wisdom. What I do mean is I need to have a heart, posture of receiving, and there is something beautiful about a child's mind and how it works, and they'd be asking questions. You're just like I never would have thought of that, like I don't know why peanut butter and jelly go together Like they just do, like no one explained that in the 90s, like it just was a thing, like they think differently and that's good. Our pride and our comfort says no, no, no, I already know. The older you get, the more you know You're stuck. So what does the Bible say? Younger people, let no one despise you. You have something to bring to the table.
Speaker 1:So we want 12-year-olds serving as readers. You probably have seen some Sunday mornings where I have all the young kids out there. We've got like seven or eight young kids ages six to two and they're all. They're like hello, welcome to sovereign grace bible church. They got their little line set. Why? Because I want it to be normal. I want serving the church to not be a discipline where they're like, okay, I gotta make sure I go in early and get there and do this thing, and I want it to be just like brushing your teeth. Like my children know, sunday morning we give, we serve and we love. I want them to know that Both generations need each other, and that leads us into our main text, titus 2.
Speaker 1:We see in this the definition. I want you to hear that this is God's definition for men's and women's ministry. We can add whatever we want. We can add bacon, we can add breakfast. We can add small groups, we can add books, we can do whatever we want Coffee. What we cannot do is take away from this or stray from the main point. That's it. So we're not legalistically saying we will only do everything that isn't like this. That's not what we're doing, okay. What we are saying, though, is that the heart of this is everything, because God said it.
Speaker 1:Now, what did God say about ministry, about intergenerational ministry, about discipleship? We'll talk about that word in a second. He says to Titus, who is the pastor ask for you teach what accords with sound doctrine. Teach what is healthy truth. That's what that means. Teach what is healthy truth. The word actually comes from the Greek. Word comes from what we now use as an orthodontist to make things straight and pretty. So teach the truth that's straight and pretty. What is the truth that's straight and pretty?
Speaker 1:Number one older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love and in steadfastness. Okay, I didn't see a ministry there. I just saw a description Like all right, we're going to build a men's ministry, what are you going to do? Well, here's what the older men are going to be like. That didn't. Okay, let's get down to the verse six. Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Okay, now we really have nothing. We have two definitions of the kind of people we desire and no methodology to which someone ought to say praise God.
Speaker 1:Because can you imagine if there was some sort of strict stair-stepper approach to discipleship where it was like no, I'm sorry, I know you hate public speaking, but that's step five of discipleship is public speaking. So I'm sorry, I know you have no gifting in that you can't speak, you have asthma and dyslexia and everything just goes against you and you can't work. But it's step five, so you can't do anything else until you do that. Thank God there's not this stair stepper that's stuck. Instead, what do we see? We see a goal, we see a target. My dear friends, that is leadership in a nutshell Getting from point A to point B. There are wisdom, principles, but there is no exact equation. It's not like if I take Joe Schmo and have him do exactly what helped me to get from point A to point B spiritually, it's going to work for him, and I had to learn that the hard way. I'm here to tell you.
Speaker 1:When I was a young pastor, I just thought everyone was me. I was like, yeah, you have a sports background, military background, your type A personality. Get her done. Tater chip, don't worry about it, we got this. Let it roll off your shoulder, don't care about nothing, figure it out. Mission first, we got this. You know how many people are like that? Not many, not many. Why? Because there's lots of different personality types and lots of different temperaments. And so I would force these young men who were meeting with me to be me. And you know what they did? They loved me and they hated every second of that discipleship with me and you know what they did. They loved me and they hated every second of that discipleship with me and they kept coming because they loved me and not because they were like. This is growing me so well and I feel so encouraged.
Speaker 1:Discipleship is not a stair-stepper, clear-set process. We have general principles and we'll go over those in a second, of how we get from point A to point B, but it will look different from person to person. So we have this goal. Older men are to be like this. Younger men I love this. Younger men just be self-controlled. Like what was really funny is that I said this the first time like three years ago.
Speaker 1:I remember I chuckled because I remember counseling young men that were like 18, 19, 20 and all of them are. Counseling pretty much ended with like three things okay, uh, yeah, you need to be more disciplined in your spiritual disciplines, you need to trust god in this thing and you need to use some self control. Like that was like pretty much every bit of counseling with men at that age came down to like that. So when I see there's one thing that younger men are expected to be, it's self-controlled. I was like God knew what he was talking about. That's true, that's good.
Speaker 1:Older men, though, it's not just self-control, we see, self-control is in the middle of them, but they're also to be sober-minded, dignified and then sound in three things faith, love and steadfastness. Here's the idea that we have a man of God who is holy. A man of God who is sober-minded, that means he thinks rightly about the world. He's ready for action, right, he's not like this think tank theologian that just does nothing. He's ready for action, but it's according to God's word and he has ordered his life and his mind according to it as well. That's kind of what sober-minded means. So he is sober minded, dignified, self-controlled and sound in faith, love and steadfastness. This idea of being very clearly that he has the fruit of the Spirit right, he is healthy in the fruit of the Spirit. The fruit of the Spirit is not these little tiny grapes where you're like I think he's got a little love in there, I think he's got a little faith. It is clear that this older man has this quality.
Speaker 1:Now, verses three through five gives us women's ministry. Verse three older women likewise, are to be reverent in behavior. That means the Greek really just means like to be in a state of being that rightly matches holiness. That'd probably be the best way I could break that down for you. So older women, likewise, are to be in a state of being that represents holiness. So they're to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good. So we see these control mechanisms. Right, that she's to have control over her body and control over her tongue, the idea being that those are two very easy things for a woman to not control, right? I love that.
Speaker 1:The men is general, self-controlled, like boys. Just come on, okay, everything. With the women, it's like okay, control your body and control your tongue. You're like cool, that's simpler. Now the older women we actually get an action. This is so cool. The older men we're like just be mature man. Come on the women, we see an action.
Speaker 1:They're to teach, and that word teach actually has to do with training. It has this idea of my favorite. Actually, that's the next train in verse four. The word means to bring someone to their senses. I thought that was hilarious. Like older ladies, bring the younger ladies to their senses, train them, discipline them towards this end.
Speaker 1:Okay, they're to teach what is good. God defines what is good. So, according to God, what should women be? Train the young women to love their husbands and children. The Greek is really this means to be children lovers and husband lovers. Right, it's like a characteristic of you.
Speaker 1:So this is not an action like teach them to choose to love. No, no, Teach them to be a lover of their children and a lover of their husband. So what is the most important thing to God in women's ministry? That women are trained to love their husbands and love their children, because they have such an influential role in the home, where they not only impact their husband to go forth into the world, to go and get the bacon and bring it home and put it on the table, to go forth and to do his ministry of whatever kind that is, but also to steward this generation and to pour into them sacrificially what no one else will ever able to do, and your children will never be able to receive from anyone else, even if they were willing. This is such a high calling Women, young women. Love your husbands, love your children.
Speaker 1:We see some characteristics To be self-controlled, pure. We see an action working at home. That means to be home workers. Again, we're putting this. It's a characteristic Women are to work at home. Now that if you clip that and put it on YouTube we're all dead, okay, and I'm here to tell you that ain't popular with nobody. Okay, I preached this for the first time Titus 2, the first time, like three and a half years ago. I'm here to tell you there's a big group and about 10, 20% of them were like I love that sermon and everyone else was like I don't know about that.
Speaker 1:What does God say is the primary? We're not restricting and saying that's a woman that's out of the home is illegal in God's eyes, is unbiblical or is not believing his word. What we're saying is the primary sphere of influence and work for a woman is the home. It's so important, but it is even more important today than any other day, because never has the devil been more at work to disrupt the family. Never has the world system been more effective at training all of us that we need two incomes and we have to do this and we got to make this work.
Speaker 1:When Bree and I were first married, I remember I told her that once we had kids, we agreed that once we had our first kids she would stay home, and we made a principle that our family is guided by, which is that I would work two full-time jobs before she worked one part-time job, and the idea behind that's not like, oh, that's so sacrificial. It is that we realize the necessity of a secure home, the necessity of children that are raised by you. Do you know what the daycare is teaching your children? Not the Bible. They're not training them in wisdom principles. They're not training them in wisdom principles. They're not training them to be godly. So when we are in a position where our children have to go to public school that's what we've decided how much more work do we have as a family to ensure they're being discipled?
Speaker 1:I think John MacArthur said it well, which was you decide between homeschool, private school and public school, just how much you want to deconstruct for your child and disciple them Right. It's a completely free choice. You pick whichever of the three you want. If you're going to do the public school, you had better be willing to invest the time. You better be at parent-teacher conferences. You better be involved as a volunteer in some way. You better go through the entire day and have your child in a relationship status where they say you say how was your day and they don't just say, good, cause you know what, you can't shepherd good, there's nothing to help with that. So if you're going to have this, you have a responsibility.
Speaker 1:What's the responsibility? It's the home, and so, again, there's no condemnation for homeschool, private school, public school, but there is a responsibility, a weight. We're either I'm homeschooling and so the weight's always on me and I'm just like somebody help a sister out, like can somebody help just one day a week for two hours and teach them science, because I hate science, my brain doesn't do math, I need somebody to do this with them, or I just need someone to watch them for an hour so I can cry and be a person, read a book and then come back Right. So we have this like ultimate pressure over here. We have a private school, which is kind of a middle of the road but still need to be involved in disciple, and we have this other end, which is public, where I am very responsible to deconstruct and disciple all the way. Why is that? The mom's specific, primary responsibility? Because she is the home worker, she is the child lover and she is the husband lover.
Speaker 1:Now, speaking of getting canceled, women are also the young. Women are to be kind and submissive to their own husbands. Again, the Bible said it, not me. We get to this point where, like, we can hear certain words and it's like I'm triggered, like don't you dare tell me that? And we think of submission as less than, and we forget that Jesus Christ submits to God, the Father, and he is perfectly God, he is co-equal with the Father, he receives all the glory that the Father receives, and so submission is not a demotion, it's not a demeaning, it is a necessity for an ordered life.
Speaker 1:And you know who understands that? The best Is the military. You know what they're not saying. Everyone should be a general, everyone should make a decision on whatever they want to do whenever they want to do it. Can you imagine trying to fight a war like that, like we're going to Germany, world War II, we're going to make this happen. And people are like, yeah, I'm going to Spain and I'm going to go to Africa. I think Africa needs some help. Over there, nothing would happen.
Speaker 1:There's a need for order, and that's why there is this leadership model that God created, not man, and that's not. That's like up in the patriarchy, all this aggressive like yeah, so like the man should be able to do whatever he wants to his wife. Like, no, no, no, no. Like manhood is most generally sacrificial love and service. Like you want to know how to be the head of your household, die in service. Like you want to know how to be the head of your household, die Like that's just die to yourself. Die to everything you want and live for your wife and your children. Be the husband that comes home after a long day at work and you see the recliner and it's calling your name and say no to it and get on the floor and play with your kids. Wash the dishes, serve your wife, serve your children, teach them God's word, read it to them. Counsel your wife after the children are down for bed. Stay up late, not indulging yourself, but pouring your life out as a sacrifice for those God has called you to pour out for.
Speaker 1:Young men are to be self-controlled. And then verses seven and eight show us the preacher. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works and in your teaching, show integrity, dignity and sound speech that cannot be condemned. This is the expectation of a leader. The expectation is that you would model what you teach. It'd be very awkward and very hypocritical. If I preach about being a family shepherd and you come over to my home and you see this guy never does that, ever like what? What the heck dude I got last night I died trying to do this. I come over here and you're like sipping a latte, sitting back and your kids are freaking out throwing things and your wife's over there crying in the corner and you have soundproof headphones on. You don't care, you have to live what you believe as a leader.
Speaker 1:Not only that, in teaching, show integrity, dignity and sound speech, the idea being teach what is biblical, what is true and what is honoring to God. If we teach those things and keep our integrity in it meaning not integrity personally, but integrity of doctrine. So if I preach through the gospel of Mark and then we preach through Colossians I preached through the gospel of Mark and then we preached through Colossians. You should not hear two contrary doctrines in that, where it's like hey, dan said that we could do this over here and then they preached this book and he said we can't do that. So I'm confused now. That should never happen.
Speaker 1:Why is this important, guys? Look at the end of verse five. Go back a little bit. Look at the end of verse five, go back a little bit that the word of God may not be reviled when wives and mothers don't fulfill their role and they fall for the agenda this world has committed to them. Sneer and laugh and mock God and say, see, even you people don't believe the book that you say you believe. Because you don't do it. You say Jesus is the only way and then you see that God said this and you're like, well, not that part, like, yes, jesus is the only way. The gospel is the truth. But don't get into my personal life about the home or my love for my children or my submission to my husband, the preacher. Why? So that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us and the idea being this that when, not if that when people seek to lie about pastors, that there is an above reproach mentality, that an elder, a leader in the church, lives a life where his worst enemy could not walk in on something. Take a picture and lie about it and it'd be believable he lives above reproach.
Speaker 1:So what is discipleship? We've used that word a couple times. I got a quote for you from Mark Dever here. He says discipling is deliberately doing spiritual good to someone so that he or she will be more like Christ. That is the simplest definition of discipleship you will probably ever see. It is doing spiritual good to someone so that he or she will become more like Christ. That's it. It's not complicated, it's not. You have to do this. You have to read through this book. You gotta go through this worksheet. That's not discipleship. Those things can be helpful in discipleship. Discipleship is doing spiritual good to someone that helps them to be more Christ-like. The Christian life is the discipled life and the discipling life. What we're trying to say in that, what Mark's saying, is that's a characteristic of it.
Speaker 1:If you're not doing this, it's a lot like being an American and not voting. It's like I get it. I get you have opinions. I get you have thoughts. I get you're mad. You hate everybody. You're still here. You can help right the ship. No, my vote doesn't count. If everyone thought that we'd all be screwed. You matter in this equation. God did not design you for your isolationist purposes.
Speaker 1:I'm not a social butterfly. You know who's not a social butterfly Me, okay. My wife and I, when we were first dating, would get into arguments Not many, but the biggest one was about the off day. And I'm here to tell you on my off day. I worked six days a week back then and on my off day the sixth day before the off day I got all of my chores done, cleaned my apartment, got all the clothes done, got everything done. Everything's ready. You know what happened on the seventh day? The curtains didn't open. Okay, I ordered food delivered to my apartment. I didn't cook, I didn't clean, I didn't talk to nobody to my apartment. I didn't cook, I didn't clean, I didn't talk to nobody. No, lights got turned on. I decompressed for 24 hours. My wife is a social butterfly and so she would see a block in our schedule where we didn't have something and she'd be like, oh, we can spend time with so-and-so and I'm like so, out of love for me, my wife I think it was on our one-year anniversary, maybe like a little before that she got us a sign for our house and it's my only sign and it says let's stay home and that's my favorite sign.
Speaker 1:Now God called me to be a pastor. I don't know if you know that or not, but it's like the opposite of being not social. I have had to die regularly to get to this point. I understand people being exhausting, but your life isn't about you not being exhausted Again. Trust me if you haven't experienced it yet. You'd rather be busy than bored. Your life was meant to go somewhere, to do something, to be poured out. Which is why after a long hard work day when you're sweaty and exhausted and everything, you sit down and you're like ah, and you feel accomplished. And if you have a couch potato day, you don't like end the day like ah, you're like ugh my back, what is happening? Like I had too much popcorn, like that's what happens on a lazy day. You were made to pour out your life.
Speaker 1:Christianity, quick, next part here is not for loners or individualists. It is for a people traveling together down the narrow path that leads to life. You must follow and you must lead. You must be loved and you must love, and we love others best by helping them to follow Jesus down the pathway of life. Everyone can think I'm not a leader and we forget that leadership is just influence and everybody has influence over somebody. So the question is not are you leading, it's how are you leading? The question is not are you following somebody? Because we're always following somebody. The question is, who are you following and how are you following? In general? Here you'll see a five-step. This is kind of principles of discipleship. Again, we're trying not to get very narrow, but this is generalized you have.
Speaker 1:The first step is just come and see where someone has a relationship but it's not called to commit. So we call this like the people that attend church for months and there's not like someone that's like all right, come on, it's time to start doing stuff. Let's's go Like you give time and space to get to know each other, to acclimate, to understand the mission. The second step is come and follow me. This is where we have relationship, but now there's a call to commitment and the beginnings of growth in that person. The next is to come and be with me. That's where you learn to lead, you begin to understand doctrine and you mature in growth. The next is come and take up your cross, which is where we grow through suffering and we willingly deny ourself. That's the key, is this willingness to deny self.
Speaker 1:And then the last step is to be sent out to make disciples and fulfill the great commission, and that's the circle effectively. Now again, these aren't like rules and regulations where it's like I don't know which stage I'm at. I might be a two or I might be a three, like it doesn't matter. What matters is that you meet with somebody regularly, for them to do spiritual good to you and you to do spiritual good to them. Which is why the mission statement of this church is that we fulfill the great commission through the great commandment within gospel community, that's the three GCs. Great commission go and make disciples of all nations. Great commandment love your neighbor as yourself. Love God with all your heart. Gospel community the necessity of people around you that believe the same things and are going to encourage you and equip you to be who you're called to be.
Speaker 1:It's been well said before that a comfortable Christian is an unproductive Christian. My dear friends, discipleship is not about comfort. In the same way that getting in shape is not about comfort when you get an account of it like a workout buddy, you're not like wow, we're so comfortable together, like you push each other to grow, to hurt, to push through again. That's what discipleship looks like. Let us pray, father. We come before you and we ask that you would bless your word as it's gone forth today, lord, we ask that you would change us from the inside out, that you'd help us to be a people of your word. That you would help us to grow deep in our relationship with you and with each other. That we would not be people that happen to high five on a Sunday morning, but would rather be a community that impacts each other throughout the week, who spends time together in conversation and encouragement and in study and preparation for what you would have us do.
Speaker 1:Lord, as we plant this church, we ask that you would secure it on a firm foundation of your word. That, if we stray at all, that you will correct us. That you will discipline us as needed and bring us back to what is faithful and what is true. And, lord, we ask ultimately for your wisdom as we go forward. That you would help us to be a church that is discerning and wise, that is thoughtful and caring, one where we disciple and make disciples and are discipled for your glory and for our good. Help us to not be like everything else and everyone else around us, but to be what you call us to be. Help us in our weakness, lord, as we seek you in all these things. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
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