S2 Episode 5: The Monkey, The Moment, and the Mindset That Changes Outcomes

What do a cruise, a rodeo cowboy, and a monkey have in common?
 More than you’d think.

In this episode, Cory and Camille of True Grit Edge share one of the most unforgettable moments from their trip—yes, it involves a monkey—and how it perfectly illustrates a principle that can change the way you handle everything in life:

E + R = O (Event + Response = Outcome).

You can’t control what happens to you.
 But you always control how you respond.

Through humor, real-life stories, and honest conversation, Cory and Camille break down:

•  Why your first reaction isn’t always your best one 
•  How to pause and “run your R” instead of reacting 
•  The importance of knowing your non-negotiables 
•  Why being kind matters more than just being “nice” 
•  How your response shapes not just outcomes—but who you become 

At True Grit Edge, this concept is at the core of how you lead, live, and show up under pressure.

Because whether it’s a tough conversation, a stressful moment, or something completely unexpected…
 the outcome is still yours to influence.

🎧 Real, relatable, and packed with perspective you can use immediately—this is one you won’t forget.

Transcript

Speaker 0:00

How's it going? It's going good. Good. Yeah, like no complaints.

Speaker 1 0:05

Good.

Speaker 0:06

And end scene. And it we're done. Everybody, thanks for joining the podcast today. We'll see you in the next team. Enjoy that sunset.

Camille 0:15

I feel like what the world's coming to like zip zip zip zip.

Cory 0:18

Yeah, you know, um hundreds of thousands of podcasts out there. And and I, you know, we uh there's another one that um we'll bring up at Rhymes with Artless. And uh they they call it listener. So listener, thank you for joining us today. Um, and that's it. Thanks for coming to our podcast today.

Speaker 1 0:39

Yeah, that's well, I feel like everything's happened so fast and such a you know a 20-second reel or tick tock or I've taken a little bit of Idaho way to say it's TikTok.

Speaker 0:53

Is it crick or creek?

Speaker 1 0:55

Depends on where you're from.

Speaker 0:57

Well, we call it well, my my aunt lives in Sellers Crick. But people always say, no, it's Sellers Creek.

Speaker 1 1:03

We grew up a creek. We don't say up a crick. We do me.

Speaker 1:07

Okay, hold on. Here's one. Do you know what a borrow pit is? If I'm like, oh, he ran off into the borrow pit, people look at me like, what? What's a jockey box?

Speaker 1 1:17

Yeah. Yeah. So compartment. It depends on where you're from.

Speaker 1:20

Yeah. Well, go look up what a borrow pit is. I'm pretty sure that even though we use that term, what happened? Well, we ran off into the ditch or the creek or the borrow pit. Um, all right. Well, that was a good podcast, like I said, with a little bit of Idaho slang.

Speaker 1 1:35

Um, well, that's fun, you know, speaking of slang. So we just got back from spring break, took our daughter on our little last harassment.

Speaker 1:43

You can made that sound like college spring break, baby. We uh TV.

Speaker 1 1:49

We went on a cruise. I love the cruise life. Um went to a few places, went out of New Orleans, Narleans. Now, you know, got to learn a couple like in Belize what they mean by Creole people, and it's really how they talk and and what Creole means in the case. You can speak Creole. Wada. Wada. We learned that on our by our tour guide. Um, yeah, so it was interesting. It was it was fun. Um what else memorables?

Speaker 2:20

Well, I think the biggest memory I have is I met one of my heroes.

Speaker 1 2:25

Oh.

Speaker 2:26

Yeah. Uh we're on a bus and I'm we're in uh I think we're more Mexico actually. Yeah, we're Mexico, and I'm we're on the bus and he he's sitting in front of me, and I'm like, man, who do I how do I know that guy? Like, no, you know, a lot of places we go, we tend to know somebody. Don't we, Camille?

Speaker 1 2:41

I'm so unobservant, Corey. I'm like, huh? There was people on the bus besides us.

Speaker 2:46

Yeah. Um, and I'm like, man, so then we we go do our thing, we get back on the the bus and we're headed back. It's about a 30-minute ride, would you say?

Speaker 1 2:54

Yeah.

Speaker 2:55

And all of a sudden it dawned on me, and he's wearing a cowboy hat, and I'm like, oh, and I know the brand of the cowboy hat, and I'm like, he's a true, he's a true cowboy.

Speaker 1 3:03

Well, when he I think he was just a row or two in front of us on the way there, and you're like, that's a legit hat. And like I think he meant not from the he didn't pick that up on the beach side.

Speaker 3:13

Yeah, no, he's not he's not he's not throwing on his cowboy boots and cowboy hat, going to that concert three times a year, hitting that bull riding. He's he's legit. So then he's sitting in front of us, and I I uh said, Hey. And he's there with his wife and his kids, and I'm like, You're true cowboy. And he goes, How do you know? And I go, because I know the brand of your cowboy hat. I have the same brand. And he goes, Whoa, well, I'm Rob Gann. And I'm like, You're kidding me. And everybody in this podcast might be going, Who the heck is Rob Gann? In fact, I think you did, didn't you, Camille? And I'm like, that's Rob Gann.

Speaker 1 3:47

And you're like, and you're like, most of the time to you. Who are you talking about?

Speaker 3:50

Well, Rob Gann is the man in the can. He is a professional rodeo cowboy. Um, I don't know if he's done any NFRs, but he's in that I think he's in the Southwest circuit, covers Texas, probably Arkansas area. We talked about the circuit that we live in, which is the what I think is the best circuit, right? In the wilderness circuit. And Camille and I and family have gone to a lot of wilderness circuit rodeos since we were kids. And so um I was starstruck so much that he's trying to help his kid get a cell phone back that was lost, and I didn't really care. I'm all about, hey, tell me about you.

Speaker 1 4:24

And he's like, Sir, can I please take care of my So Camille, man in the can?

Speaker 4:28

I know you know what that means. What does it mean if you're the man in the can?

Speaker 1 4:31

So you were the bull right then, and he was trying to distract. I was the bull and he wanted to get in the can. He's like, I gotta distract this guy so I can take care of business. Honey.

Speaker 4:41

So he is what's the man in the can?

Speaker 1 4:44

Huh?

Speaker 4:44

Do you know the man in the can is, don't you?

Speaker 1 4:46

Yeah, he jumps in there when the bull's coming at you.

Speaker 4:49

He's he's yeah, he's those those man in the can. He's the distractor. So anyway, yeah. Yeah. We should we should get Rob. We gotta get Rob on. He was awesome.

Speaker 1 5:00

You uh well not man in the you've had to jump on the corral fence a few times.

Speaker 5:04

And when we've had the difference between Yeah, but the difference between Rob and I is that Rob doesn't poop his pants, and I do. I have no problem uh getting in the box with a stair or a bull, but it doesn't mean I'm not scared. In fact, it's funny because I always say, Why don't you guys all go away for a minute? Because if it gets too many people, it gets distracting. That's really just a distraction, so you guys don't see how scared I am. Or s or the smell. Yeah. Anyway, so yeah, that's the memorable experience.

Speaker 1 5:35

Speaking of that, yeah, like so uh we go to an animal sanctuary place. Oh no, yeah, that was memorable. I didn't realize we're going to. That's part of the trip. And and so uh you know, it's interactive, and they're teaching us about we're on Honduras, the Roatan Island, and anyway, they're teaching us about the culture there and the animals, and those that are native to the island, those that are like in that area, and they have monkeys. I don't know exactly what breed or kind of monkey, the whiteface capuchy, some something. It was the weird breed. I can't remember the exact name of those monkeys. They're small, sit on your shoulder, little. I do think they have whiteface, right? And um, they're known as being thieves. They'll do anything for like a sunflower seed, including sunflower. They'll pick your pocket. They'll pick your pocket.

Speaker 6:24

Well, in fact, they made us leave our backpacks, sunglasses needed to be tight, don't wear a hat, don't have things in your pockets.

Speaker 1 6:32

To be prepared, the monkey might take it and run up the tree at your own risk.

Speaker 6:35

Watch, yeah. So no backpacks though.

Speaker 1 6:38

Yeah, they were they were funny and silly. And um they're you know, they were uh entertaining themselves with other people with, like we said, hats and glasses and stuff like that. That people that had extra sunscreen on, they liked that, they like the smell of those things. So it was over. Corey's kind of standing over in the corner, just being there. And all of a sudden that monkey jumped over like three people and landed right on Corey on his knees.

Speaker 7:06

And I had my back to those people.

Speaker 1 7:08

Football broad yeah, it came out of nowhere. Football broad shoulders and nice shiny place to land. Oh, it's that bald head. It's like a beacon run my beep, like come land here.

Speaker 7:20

He and then he did something with his luggage, by the way.

Speaker 1 7:24

He uh he made himself very comfortable on Corey, all over, like filling all the nooks and crannies. And then, as I'm trying to get my camera out to film this, um, I notice the monkey kind of spreads his little legs a little bit and this nice stream comes right down. And my neck got beat on by a monkey.

Speaker 7:45

It went between my shirt and my back. The best thing that's I don't think I would most memorable, sure.

Speaker 1 7:52

Yeah.

Speaker 7:53

Best, not even close. Because it didn't happen to be. Let's go back to the man in the can. Let's go back to Rob. That's the best. No, hanging out with you guys was the best, hanging out with the family. And there was a good time. It was a large, there was what, 17 of us. So it was it was the big family.

Speaker 1 8:08

Yeah, it was fun. We had lots of good times.

Speaker 8:10

Um But I had to choose an R, an E plus R equals O, which we're gonna talk about a little bit today. But before we do that, okay, just real quick. I know you don't like it when I do these things, but I have I I gotta ask a question. Well, I do it every day. Um, so Camille, this is this is not how you'd like to start off, but it's because you don't like to talk about yourself. And I like I love talking about myself. Let's talk about us though.

Speaker 1 8:32

Okay.

Speaker 8:33

So uh it is April, uh-huh, but in March we did hit a milestone, and that's one year of Barn to Border.

Speaker 1 8:40

Crazy.

Speaker 8:42

Is there anything that I know we did our our 2025 recap in December, January. Uh so this isn't recap question. This is what stood out, what what's been memoralty in the past year?

Speaker 1 8:52

Like, you know, um at first, of course, you know, wasn't shy about going like this isn't my space. I don't really want to do this. Um, and I thought I'll just do it till he can find someone better, someone different. But it's been fun, and so I like doing it. That's what stood out the most. I it has completely shocked me. But I think anything that makes you grow and uh is challenging if you look at it the right way and that you know it was hard. I when you're like, okay, I'm setting up this stuff, I'd be like, uh it's like here goes the feeding the cows. Uh but actually sometimes I actually enjoy it. I mean, I actually enjoy this. I'm talking about the cows. Only when it's cute and there's cute little baby cows and it's spring and it's warm outside, then I enjoy it. When it's winter and snow and you're out of town, I hate it. But I have loved the I have learned to love doing the the podcast, Barton Border.

Speaker 9:50

Well, let me tell you what is that's surprising. That's surprising. Uh you have you you've done a great job. This is not surprising to me. I have not learned this though. I have not learned this, I should say, and it's not surprising. I knew this was gonna be the case. First of all, thank you to um so to our one listener. Just kidding, we have many, and I think that's probably been a surprise to Camille and I until I looked at uh Camille and said, no, that's no longer a surprise. We get comments all the time. We see we see we run into people we don't even know. Yeah. Hey, and by the way, Camille, you sound great. And you do. And that's not a surprise to me. I knew that was going to be the case. You've done a great job. And I've had the the biggest reason I've had fun doing this is because you and I are doing it together. So now that the feel good's out of the way, let's get back to the monkey peeping down your back. Getting to know Corey a little bit better in that E plus R equals O. So um Triggered Edge and Triggered Edge Style, we uh we talk about E plus R equals O. And just real quick, we got to give some credit. Um, I learned this concept from Tim Kite in Focus 3 in 2013. And um, but you know, Dr. Robert Resnick originated this equation, and then Jack Canfield he wrote a book, he brought it forward. So we've got to make sure that we understand that it came from Dr. Resnick and Jack Canfield. Yeah, and Tim Kite um in Focus 3, and I I think Focus 3 still uses it.

Speaker 1 11:21

Um it's an amazing concept.

Speaker 11:23

It's an amazing concept, it's it's it's a drop the mic concept. Everybody needs to understand E plus Arch O. So in that moment, Camille, I had to make a decision about how I'm gonna respond. An event happened. The monkey relieved itself on me. I didn't ask, I didn't say, hey, come over here, land on my head and do your thing.

Speaker 1 11:43

I'm a perfect place for this to happen.

Speaker 11:45

I am looking forward to this, and I've I've been waiting for this the whole cruise. Here we are at the moment.

Speaker 1 11:53

And I don't remember that being in the disclaimer about him picking your pockets, taking things. I mean, he did after the fact goes. That was not in the brochure.

Speaker 12:04

No, no, no, no, no, no. Um but in life we don't what really went through my head at the moment was don't flinch. Yeah. Because the the trainer and tour guide had said to us, if they get on your back, no sudden movements. And I'm squinting. I remember kind of just squinting the whole time through it, like because the only thing I could do was move my face. And um, I mean, it went from it was a rainy, cold day to all of a sudden there's some warmth down my back. And it took me a minute to go, oh, he's uh having his moment of urinating down my back. But that's that was really my response at the time.

Speaker 1 12:44

And then um I was so impressed that you listened to the because our instinct is to freak out like to knock them off, you're right.

Speaker 12:52

And their tails go around your neck and they use that as balance itself. Yeah, they use that as balance. So his tails are around my neck. So really my R, my response was um to and you know, in and we always we we say you know with run, we call it running your R, right? The first thing you need to do kind of is do nothing for just a second.

Speaker 1 13:14

Just a second.

Speaker 13:15

And just let just really what's the event that's going on? I don't yeah, but whatever. Do nothing.

Speaker 1 13:19

Go back to your principles of what the guy said.

Speaker 13:22

Don't yeah, I didn't really have time to not do anything, but then yet I was in a point where I couldn't do anything.

Speaker 1 13:27

Yeah.

Speaker 13:27

So anyway. Um E plus R equals O.

Speaker 1 13:31

Yeah. Because you could have screamed like a baby and ran off crying. But you didn't.

Speaker 13:39

So do we want to talk about that a little bit today? So so you know, TrueGrid Edge um is uh a mission that um we've mentioned before. I'm not if you want to go back and listen to some pat possible past um podcasts, you can learn a little bit more about what True Grid Edge is. And and it goes off into some some different areas, but we wanted to just uh hone in today a little bit on uh Dr. Resnick and uh his his theory. And um, and again, you know, hats off to Tim. Tim Kite unfortunately passed away a couple years ago, but focus three is carrying this on with U plus Articles O. And and True Grid Edge is is is also with what Dr. Resnick came up with. We're we're out there talking about it as well. This great concept. But um there's that space between your event and your response, and and we call it, we call it at True Good Edge, we call it the wow, right? It's kind of the way of work. And this is where either your wow can either collapse or all stay together, what who you are, your way under pressure and stress is how you do it. Now we've all had moments. I've had a lot of moments, we've all had moments where our response wasn't great, and a lot of times we we we respond with we gotta control that event.

Speaker 1 14:55

Um you try and get in front of it.

Speaker 14:58

Yep. You try and get in front of it, and um you really want to you really you really want to win that space. Um, so we talk about um the first thing you need to do is listen. Don't speak, don't send something right away, don't react. And that's difficult, isn't it, Camille? Um, but that's not running your R.

Speaker 1 15:22

Because where you get in fight or flight. You gotta you gotta take that pause and and go, am I going to work this through? Like, what do what do I want to become out of? Like who who who am I? Who do I want to become out of this situation?

Speaker 15:41

Right, exactly. So number one is just listen for just a second and uh and understand the event. And then you're right. Number two is who do I want to be? Because um I can I can tell you through this all came through a failure of mine. And I didn't really care who I was gonna be. I was gonna control an event. That's how I used to be. Um and I think what you have to do is when you determine who you want to be, is you have to say, This is not what I what I how I feel. This is not what I what I think they deserve. Um, this is not um that I'm gonna get back to that. But this is also to a question that we ask a lot of people that people can't answer and we usually throw them off. And what's that question?

Speaker 1 16:29

What are your non-negotiables.

Speaker 16:32

If we came to you and we asked you what are your non-negotiables right now, could you answer that? And a lot it's because you don't sit and think about it. So during that moment of who you want to be, you gotta think about well, who's your non-negotiables? Or what are, excuse me, what are your non-negotiables?

Speaker 1 16:45

Yeah. Well, and I've been through exercises and mission statement creations and and things like that when you're trying to sort through what your values are and what you want to do. The words on the wall. Yeah, and but as you're going through there, you know, I think there's times, you know, I listed out values. Some are hard to define, whether you're talking about business or family or religion or um or or anything in between. And you're you're it can get it can be a long list. And I don't know that it needs to be that long. Like I've gone like, well, I want this to be my value, and I want this to be my standard, and I want this, but that doesn't mean maybe what I want. I guess if I'm getting clear, your non-negotiables should be who you are and what you are in any situation, and stamped. Like you that's what it says. It says non-negotiable. I'm not gonna negotiate this.

Speaker 17:47

Yeah, and people need to know it. And I think it's okay to ask people. If you would ask me a few years ago, Corey, what's your non-negotiables? I would have probably just off the top of my head uttered off a bunch of stuff and just muttered off, uttered, hey cows. I got cows on the brain, muttered on, muttered, uh, muttered off of a bunch of stuff that I didn't really know, and I couldn't come back and tell you what they were. So challenge, go find out what your non-negotiables are. Three, four things that you're like, you know what, I'm not gonna go negotiate on those things.

Speaker 1 18:15

And anything, you know, like when we had Jade Vecchio on and his number, you know, one thing he wanted people to know about him was his relationship with his savior. That's a non-negotiable. That's a non-negotiable um I've had to take and pass ethics tests. I have, you know, like I have to have that be a non-negotiable mine in business.

Speaker 18:36

What's one of your non-negotiables, Camille?

Speaker 1 18:39

Um don't get between me and my family. Go all mother bear on you. Just kidding. Really nice, actually. Um yeah, like my family. Family first. You know, and uh that we just spend time together, and you know, you can go into that, but ethics, family, savior, all of those things, like probably my top three right there.

Speaker 19:08

I think the one that um that I that I you know I have four that are pretty pretty burned into me, and um you've you've mentioned a handful of them here. One of the ones is that um one of my my well, it's it's my top one is that honesty and don't mislead people, but I think the one that I have to remember a lot all the time is I don't deal with negativity. Right? Yeah, which is another Tim Kite, focus three, they they teach it the no B C D, right? You can't blame anybody, you can't complain, and you don't get defensive. Doesn't mean you can't talk about critical things. Right. So who do you want who what you know who do you want to be during the situation and your R.

Speaker 1 19:55

What's the third thing that we teach, Camille, as you're kind of evaluating and running your R Um, I think like what you what is the outcome what is the outcome you want and and and getting there, make sure that you're acting kind, not nice.

Speaker 20:13

Just Yeah, you're not looking for that um immediate relief. It's not about winning an argument. It's not uh the the the real outcome is does it align with your standards and your non-negotiables for you, for the relationship, and for the team. Uh you can't all you can't control you can't always control the outcome. You might not be able to control it, but you fully, but you can influence it based on how you run your R and the things we've talked about.

Speaker 1 20:37

Well, and it's um it shouldn't be yeah, it shouldn't be that deep. Because you can't try to say this. You're um I think sometimes when we focus on the outcome a lot though, we're trying to create events to get to that outcome. And so we this is about things that are getting pressed upon you and what is the solution you want at the end of it? And and I'll say this to a lot of people that they come to me with problems, I'm like, well, what do you want the end to look like here? What do you want the result to be? What do you want that outcome to be? Is it to get back at that person or is it to find a solution?

Speaker 21:18

Are you gonna feel are you gonna feel better in the end? So you mentioned you mentioned to get back at that person, you know, um one of the things that we don't we don't have in print. We don't um but I do feel like it's critical is during that moment, if it if it's if it's a situation that someone else has caused, right? Yeah, can you actually when we go back to who do you want to be, and and can you say, Hey, I want I want to treat the golden rule, right? I want to treat them as I'd want to be treated. And when you get to that final step of of acting, which is you know kind. Versus nice, is there an opportunity in there for you to serve them? And I think that can sometimes change your mindset as you view an event. Can I serve the event in a in a way that's gonna influence the outcome? Um what's your thoughts, Sarah Camille?

Speaker 1 22:17

Yeah, I think that's the hardest answer because especially if they've created the event, I mean, or the the hardest not answer, but the hardest um thing to follow at the end is to serve, right? Like if if an act of kindness is to is to help someone grow um and help them become a better version of themselves. So in your reaction, are you doing that for that person that's brought this event to you? And part of it may be that in order for them to grow, you need to serve them. So that's a that's a tough concept to get behind though, because emotions are always raw and real at that moment. And so that's why pause is so key. Um, and sometimes I've needed to pause for a good 24 hours or even a week because if the emotions are that raw. And you can easily say, like, we're gonna talk about this, we're gonna get on this, we're gonna, we're gonna find a solution for this. That could be your response right then because we need to we we need to put the value into this that it deserves and in this short, high emotional 30 seconds that I have right available, it's not gonna be quality. And so being able to express that is tough too. So it's in serving them and being kind, like that's hard. It's hard to do.

Speaker 23:40

But it can change your heart, it can turn their heart too. Um and again, it's it's not about um deceiving anybody to an outcome, but it's being truth. And people are gonna know. Um, the other thing too that it it comes down to when you when you run your R every time, every time, um, in those small moments and in the big ones, it's it's kind of when it can cost you something. And um, so you got to be careful, but people will start to expect it from you that you're steady, you're predictable, and that's gonna create that trust, right? And consistency is your wow. I think it's your credibility. If if we were to say, you know, okay, we we asked what your non-negotiables are. Wow stands for way of work. It can go for you personally, you're an organization, it's your operating system. I think one of the biggest wow factors, if someone could say about me, I could say, like, okay, I'm getting it right. And I'm not there yet, but he's consistent. When we go to Corey, we know what we're gonna get. Most cases he's probably gonna make you laugh. He's gonna make light of something. But when I really need it, and I that's one of the things that I love about Camille is that um she's super consistent. And um, even when things are down, you're gonna get met with love and respect. But she's gonna be kind. She's not gonna be nice, but she will be super kind. She will be she'll be super kind.

Speaker 1 24:57

No. Okay.

Speaker 25:01

Camille, um, as we kind of thanks for everybody for for taking a few minutes with us. E plus R equals O is um important, and again, I've mentioned it a few times. Just want to make sure we give credit where credit is due to those that came up with this. And if you don't know um about e plus r equals O, go research it. Yeah, go go um go understand it, and it will change your view on so many things. And so uh and it's a game changer, and I am so blessed that Tim Kite back in 2012, 2013, brought this forward to to so many of us, and it it was it's been a game changer. Um Camille, again, congratulations on one year. Anything else you want to add before we wrap up?

Speaker 1 25:46

I don't think so, but if we could find that picture and put it out there, I think that would be a game changer.

Speaker 25:53

Um the pi the picture of the monkey in me does exist, and the person that has that in their phone, I have asked them. Man code, cowboy code, that goes nowhere.

Speaker 1 26:02

Oh nowhere. We'll see if I can uh convince somebody with the are you gonna create an event.

Speaker 26:09

Are you gonna create an event here, Camille, that I'm gonna have to run my R with?

Speaker 1 26:12

Well, I think he'll sell I don't think his non-negotiable is to not sell that or not share, I shouldn't say sell, share that video. So I don't think it'll be too hard to talk him out of it with a plate of cookies.

Speaker 26:24

I'm texting him right now. If Camille contacts you about the picture, do not respond.

Speaker 1 26:28

No. We gotta, it's for the good of the listener, Corey. You just talked about the listener. It's for the good of the listener.

Speaker 26:36

Thank you, listener. Thank you, listener. All right, Camille, congratulations on one year.

Speaker 1 26:41

We saw some amazing scenery while we were there, but nothing beats our Idaho sunset. So go enjoy those Idaho sunsets. Have a great day.

Speaker 26:52

Enjoy, enjoy the sunset wherever we are. Thank you, everybody.