Stoned Cold Sober: Reading from #JFTRE26

Mookie Spitz reads Section 26 of Jonnie Fazoolie & the Transfinite Reality Engine — a psychedelic fever dream disguised as a love story wrapped inside a tech satire. 

As Jonnie attempts the impossible feat of staying sober, he fantasizes about a stable life with Penny Pitz, the one woman who’s both his salvation and his torment. But Penny’s not playing along — she’s too busy blacking out, waking up in cubes and clubs, and getting hit on by coworkers who read too much Manosphere Reddit. Meanwhile, Jonnie's delusions of romance curdle into thirst-fueled rage as he discovers Penny left him off her viral "Thrillionaire Under 30" list.

Beneath the surface, Penny is losing time — literally. Her cycles of dreamlike blackouts aren't just stress or trauma. They're incursions. She's being manipulated by a mysterious entity: a childlike, Lewis Carroll's Wonderland-coded figure named Alice, who toys with her perception and exerts total control. Alice doesn’t just haunt Penny — she flaunts infinite versions of Penny’s life within the Infiniverse, taunting her with what could be, might have been, or still might happen, all while stripping her agency. Every dream is a trap, every awakening a reset, designed to keep Penny reactive, disoriented, and ultimately, under Alice’s thumb.

Back in the “real” world, Jonnie is spiraling. His texts go from desperate to obscene, his ambitions from grand to pathetic. What starts as rejection morphs into obsession, and his ego collapses in on itself like a dying star. Penny, meanwhile, takes all of it — the insult, the intrusion, the indignity — and channels it into domination: a Vegas spectacle where she reigns supreme, leaving Jonnie to stew in his own #FOMO.

This section captures the spiral: the way people mistake humiliation for passion, ambition for connection, and blocklists for closure. It’s an absurd, heartfelt, sexually frustrated ride through influencer culture, male fragility, and post-traumatic lust — with a chilling undercurrent of something far less human pulling the strings.

Stay tuned for the full audiobook, blog post recaps, and more chaotic brilliance from the Fazoolieverse!

First Reading

Alice Unchained

Next Reading

Full Body Axial Rotation