51. De-escalation

Andrea and Griff discuss a couple recent incidents worth talking about and effective de-escalation techniques.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:09

Welcome to Loaded, the Hahn Ready Mix podcast with Andrea Meyer, Griffin Hahn, and producer Lex.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

How's it going today?

SPEAKER_00 0:16

Great. Happy Valentine's Day.

SPEAKER_01 0:18

Yeah. Is it this weekend, right?

SPEAKER_00 0:20

Yeah. We shouldn't even talk about holidays on this podcast anymore since none of us really participate or care about them.

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Uh I went to Walgreens today and bought a card. Did you? Fully prepared. You're ready. I'm ready.

SPEAKER_00 0:36

That's really good.

SPEAKER_01 0:37

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 0:38

Uh my husband's out of out of town.

SPEAKER_01 0:40

So he You'll get a nice text message.

SPEAKER_00 0:43

He did give us a little Valentine's Day surprise right before he left. But it was a uh an ice cream maker that has a ton of parts and requires a lot of ingredients that I don't have on hand. So he like conveniently dropped a huge project in my lap and walked up to the house.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

Have this done when I get back. Thanks. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:00

So my kids are excited about it. Uh, but I have not had the energy or motivation to really dig into it yet. But we'll see. The thought, the thought was there. He did think about it ahead of time. So good. I frequently tell him that I would rather have him be a nice husband every day than be a really nice husband on Valentine's Day.

SPEAKER_01 1:18

So that's too much death.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

That's my advice. But for anyone else who's celebrating, Lex, are you celebrating Valentine's Day?

SPEAKER_02 1:28

Yeah, me and Danny and Kai.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

Some bachelors. Did you buy Valentine's for the dogs to have your own little party? Okay, great. Well, do you have any announcements today?

SPEAKER_01 1:41

Yeah, we won't I wanted to talk through, and I know we're gonna get into this more kind of the meat of the discussion today, but we had an incident a couple weeks ago that happened on a job site that I think is worth spending a little time talking about. So we had a a truck at the washout and uh a driver on the ladder of the washout, or sorry, on the ladder of the truck, uh cleaning their truck, and another truck came up to the washout with with some speed, it sounds like, and had their chutes at an angle that they could not see where the chutes were, I believe. And those chutes, it's a good thing the driver on the ladder was paying attention because they were able to scramble up out of the way, but the chutes hit the ladder where he was standing. And it could have been a really, really bad incident with injuries and and what else. Uh we don't know. But scary situation. And and so I I sent a message out this week to everybody just to remind. Make sure to keep understand your uh surroundings when you're driving, be aware of what hazards are out there, and make sure we have full control of the truck at all times. And that includes the chute. So if you gotta slow down or stop or move your chute to an angle where you can see it and know what it may hit, you know, that's really important. This isn't the first time we've had three chutes on and ran into things, right? Last year it was a a building we scraped with the chutes over in East Moline. So this was a really close call and one that I want us to learn from before uh something similar happens and and someone gets hurt.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

So Yeah, so there's a couple things you said there about you know taking the time to get out and move your shoots where you can see them is a good idea. Slowing down as you're moving around with shoots on is a good idea. I also think in this case, there wasn't we always want to be efficient, but there wasn't a super need to of urgency to get washed out right away. Yeah. It's okay to just wait until you have room to get there safely.

SPEAKER_01 3:42

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:44

All right. Well, I want to talk about the wellness screenings are coming up. So this podcast will come out on Monday, and the first wellness screenings are on Tuesday, the 17th, in Muscatine, and then on Friday, the 20th in Davenport. Also on the 20th, the people from Principal, the 401k Company are going to come in. They have like a 30-minute presentation that everyone's invited to stick around and listen to, but they also will do one-on-one meetings with people after uh their little presentation. So you can ask specific questions about exactly what you have in your account, you know, what that looks for looks like for you after you retire, if they have any suggestions of things you could change if you're taking advantage of the full company match, just yeah, really specific to your individual questions. So I would highly recommend that.

SPEAKER_01 4:29

Should we have them on the podcast next week? That would be Oh, we could.

SPEAKER_00 4:32

That's a great idea.

SPEAKER_01 4:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:34

We will do that. We'll ask Jason. Stay tuned.

SPEAKER_01 4:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:36

More on the 401k next week. Uh, then the next week on the 24th, they will be in Geneseo for the wellness screenings and then following back up in Davenport on the 27th for anybody that missed those other dates. So uh you look forward to information from dispatch on when exactly you are scheduled for that. In addition to the wellness screenings, uh, health insurance has been a big topic. Too much of my time has been spent talking about health insurance and wellness in general this week. So it's it's on my mind. I wanted to share a couple things with people. Um, one thing that I'm not sure people know of is a website called goodrx.com. And this is where you can go to find out where is the best place to get your prescription. And it's kind of tricky because sometimes the cheapest way to get your prescription is not through insurance. And there's a long explanation of this that I'm, you know, not an expert on, but basically the insurance companies negotiate a rate on prescriptions, but so do stores. So the stores have maybe sometimes a different price than what your insurance has negotiated. So sometimes you can get a better better deal if you don't use your insurance.

SPEAKER_01 5:47

Really?

SPEAKER_00 5:47

It's crazy. I just went through this example with somebody that they were getting charged$104 a month for prescription they get every month through insurance. And if all all they had to do was tell Walgreens not to use the insurance, and the price of the prescription went down to$16.

SPEAKER_01 6:03

You're kidding.

SPEAKER_00 6:04

It's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 6:05

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 6:06

And there's some, there's some there's some other considerations with that. Like if you don't go through insurance, then it's not going towards your deductible and your out-of-pocket max. So there's sometimes a trade-off on that. But I would think for this person, it's definitely worth just don't even run my insurance and get get it at the cheaper cost. Wow. And the way we found that out was through this goodrx.com website. So definitely recommend checking that out. Another good option for prescriptions that we've talked about before is this Canadian prescription company. It's called Canna RX. I really don't know how this works. I guess it's just because of the of the regulations or whatever in in Canada versus the US, that prescriptions are just so much cheaper through them. And you can't get every prescription through this service, but there are a lot of them, especially maintenance medications. If you're someone that every single month you're going to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription, or if you can get a 90-day supply, this Canna RX is going to save you so much money. What I learned this week was that we only had three prescriptions go through Canna RX last year, and each one saved that person around$1,200. The per the actual person. Wow. So that's worth it. Yeah. You know, worth the trouble of calling and getting your prescription set up with them. But on the on the insurance side, on the company saving side, it was up to$12,000. So if we could get a few more people to run their prescriptions through that Canadian service, that would be great for them and great for us. I'm gonna say the names of the prescriptions. I'm not a not an expert on this, so I'm probably pronouncing them wrong. But these are the top prescriptions that they listed that we for sure have people taking these prescriptions and they could be getting them through the Can RX program.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 7:49

Or should I hand them to you and you can read them?

SPEAKER_01 7:52

Sure. Let me give it, let me give it a shot.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:54

Which part of this is it? Uh Jardiance, is that right?

SPEAKER_00 8:03

I think I've seen a commercial on that one, so I think you got that one.

SPEAKER_01 8:05

You didn't tell me how terrible your handwriting is. I didn't know. Uh Trilogy Trilogy Ellipta? Ellipta? Did you just comment on someone's handwriting? Well, everyone knows my handwriting is terrible. Uh Sinjardi. Uh Zigdao.

SPEAKER_00 8:24

Zigduo. Zigduo.

SPEAKER_01 8:25

Zigduo. There's no way that's a U. Uh Farksiga and Qvar or QR.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

There you go. So if any of those prescriptions sound remotely familiar to you.

SPEAKER_01 8:40

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 8:42

It would be worth considering uh going through that Canadian prescription program. And I am happy to help you navigate that. So it does take having your doctor will have to send your prescription through this service, but I can help you get it, you know, to the point where all they have to do is connect those two dots. But you will save money and we will all save money if you can do that.

SPEAKER_01 9:03

Sounds like it's worth it. Yeah. What do we want to talk about today?

SPEAKER_00 9:06

Uh I wanted to talk about the other um incident a little bit that you had posted about.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:11

And just going through some tips for people on how to de-escalate in heated situations.

SPEAKER_01 9:17

Yeah, that's a good idea.

SPEAKER_00 9:18

So why don't you kind of start it off?

SPEAKER_01 9:21

I don't want to get into too many details about the incident that happened, but just I guess 10,000 foot view, uh, a verbal argument turned physical and you know, things got heated and and a line was crossed, basically, of of what we expect for the values that we have here and the way that we interact with one another. We got to make sure that doesn't happen. In in my message I sent out this week, uh, a reminder to everybody that that we we need to de-escalate if we get into those situations. And we we can't ever cross that line of turning physical. People are gonna have disagreements, and you know, we're pretty casual about the way we talk to each other. I mean, uh so I I guess that there's we want everyone to get along and we want people to treat each other with respect, but it's also construction. So we know that uh occasionally people are going to get rough with the way they talk with each other, but we can't ever let that turn into something more. Yeah. So I think that's what we're gonna talk about today, right?

SPEAKER_00 10:17

Yeah, it was kind of weird timing. Actually, your your post kind of reminded me that I had just watched this rip webinar a couple weeks ago about emotional intelligence, and a lot of it was about you know recognizing your own emotions, what they mean, and what you do with that. And I was sort of so I kind of went back through that and pulled some things out that we could talk about today. Uh so the first thing that happens, like you said, you're in a in a verbal disagreement with someone, both parties have some kind of physical reaction in that moment. So I thought it'd be fun, Lex, to talk about what your physical reactions are when you start to get heated. What what do you notice physically happening when you start to get mad about something?

SPEAKER_02 11:01

I don't know. I usually just shut down. I don't talk to anyone.

SPEAKER_00 11:04

What about you? What do you feel? What do you feel when you're getting mad?

SPEAKER_01 11:07

You know, you get you hear the um things go red, right? You see red.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

That's a good one. I I think we call it getting heated, but I think it's because you actually start to feel hot, right? Like you might start to sweat, or you your face starts to get hot, or you feel you know, tingling or hot somewhere on your body. That's usually a a sign for you to recognize, like, oh, hey, this is this is getting physically heated.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

So I can tell when you are mad because you have a physical tell. Your lower jaw ever get mad. No, no, no, that's not true. Your lower jaw like shakes. Yes. Yes. Yes. I can tell.

SPEAKER_00 11:41

Or I also want to like clench my hands, usually under a table or something. I can see that, but yeah. You start gripping your hands, that's another tell. The jaw clenching is one, the way your breathing changes. Like some people breathe deeper and slower, and some people start breathing faster when they get mad. So start recognizing your own reactions to situations. Another thing that is sometimes happening for people is um like tunnel vision, or you're you'll start the way your eyes work starts to get different when you start to get really mad. And then I think another thing that happens is sometimes when people are getting upset, they start leaning into you. When you're yelling at someone, you're leaning towards them or pointing towards them. So if you start to feel yourself leaning in or drawing closer to to the heat, that's a sign that it's time to like step back, right?

SPEAKER_01 12:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:30

Any did that trigger you to remember any other physical sense?

SPEAKER_02 12:33

Lex shut down and he doesn't. I don't really get angry. I can't tell you the last time I was truly angry. That is not true.

SPEAKER_01 12:40

Because I hear you cussing at your computer often.

SPEAKER_02 12:44

I'm not angry, I'm just upset. I'm like, what the f I'm not gonna yeah, yeah. I just I'm very animated.

SPEAKER_00 12:51

I'm not do you lean towards your computer and like uh hit it harder when you're gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_01 12:56

I should probably there's I want to punch it usually. It's like Office Space with the copy machine. Have you seen that movie? No. You've probably you've seen it, haven't you, Andrea? Yes. They beat the hell out of a copier with a baseball bats. I'd definitely do that. Yeah. But probably with my work boots. Yeah. Well, they do that too. They stomp on it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:15

Okay. So in this situation, if you are recognizing in any of these physical emotional reactions, what do you think is the first thing you should do?

SPEAKER_02 13:24

Breathe.

SPEAKER_00 13:26

It's a good one. What I have down here is to create space in some way. So if that's leaning away from someone, if that's taking a physical step back, if it's putting something between you, like uh I think that's why at a lot of places they have a counter, you know, where you order something. You can't physically get right next to the person. There's something between you.

SPEAKER_01 13:47

I'm just picturing the movie Super Troopers. And when Barbara dives over the counter.

SPEAKER_00 13:55

That's why the counter is there to protect people. I also think about this with drivers, if that's the door, you know, you have you have something between you and whoever, or if it's on the other side of the chutes or on the other side of the truck or something. Just like creating space, giving yourself a chance to think it through.

SPEAKER_01 14:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:14

Any other ideas about creating space?

SPEAKER_01 14:16

I think space sometimes could be time, right? Yeah. So like taking a time out, wouldn't that be a helpful thing? Going for a walk, walk it off. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:25

Oh, yeah. Let's talk about this later for sure. Another recommendation that they had was is to announce what's happening. Like if you're starting to feel heated, just say, hey, I'm I'm getting heated about this, or this is getting too heated, or let's take a minute. Like just I recognize that you're mad and you recognize that I'm mad. Let's talk about this later.

SPEAKER_01 14:43

No, I think that's a good thing to do from a it shows maturity and and kind of mutual respect to be like, listen, we're clearly not on the same page. And before we say or do something that is going to hurt each other, let's just have some space. And most of the time there's not such an urgency that there isn't room for that.

SPEAKER_00 15:04

Yeah, this happens with us a lot in a text message or a chat, even sometimes like a text message can get heated and you recognize it and you're like, I can't stand text messages.

SPEAKER_01 15:14

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Hey, let's talk about this tomorrow. And then just immediately diffuses the situation and we can talk about it later. The other thing you kind of alluded to earlier is take a timeout or get help. So you're just saying hey, let's let's give it a minute or let's talk about this tomorrow, or call someone, call a supervisor, call dispatch, get someone else involved to help de-escalate the situation if you can't do it yourself.

SPEAKER_01 15:37

Yeah. A mediator a lot of times can help make sure there's no low blows, so to speak, and and people are, even if it's just an argument, you know, just less likely to act a fool if there's someone around playing referee, right? Exactly. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:53

And the the last thing that I kind of wanted to touch on on this is how important uh reporting is. Uh, you know, I I hear about it a lot with kids and you know, mandatory reporters at school, teachers or whoever. But I think in our work environment where it is such a tight family business, like we're all kind of mandatory reporters. Uh, we want to keep the culture here the way that it is. We want to keep everyone safe. And so for those reasons, we're all obligated to make sure that we're reporting if we observe something that is out of line.

SPEAKER_01 16:24

It's a hard thing, right? No, no, people don't want to uh feel like they're the cause of somebody else getting in trouble. It's our job, uh, you know, as management to make sure that everyone has a safe place to work and they don't feel threatened here and they they know what they can expect from each of their coworkers as far as the norms of our behavior. And so if somebody gets outside those guidelines, you know, we need to address it, or it's a really slippery slope to mayhem and chaos and and disrespect and violence and all these other things. And and this this is there's workplaces out there where that's commonplace, and we never want that to be the case here. So we have to to make sure that you know it's it's not a personal thing, right? So if you if you see something, you need to tell us for the good of everyone at the company, not just whatever the individuals that are involved in that situation.

SPEAKER_00 17:24

Yeah. And the and and then in this situation, that's exactly what happened and how it, you know, unfortunately how it had to play out.

SPEAKER_01 17:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:31

There's just so many, like you said, it's it is the construction industry. We hire people who are very confident. Like those are the people who are best at doing this job, is people who are confident and go in strong and go in hard, and sometimes that can go sideways. Uh, so we're never gonna prevent every heated situation from happening, but I do hope that we can give people some tools and some ideas of how to work through through those so that we can all come back to work and try it again the next day.

SPEAKER_01 17:57

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 17:57

All right, thanks for listening to Loaded, the Hon Right Emix podcast. We'll talk to you again next week.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

Thanks so much.