Evolved Men Podcast

How To Use Visioning as a Weapon: How to Lead Yourself Through Chaos

Season 1 Episode 11

What if your breakthrough isn't about hustling harder, but getting crystal-clear on who you're becoming?


This episode cuts through the noise to reveal how creating a genuine vision transforms everything. Not a corporate mission statement or some vague affirmation, but a raw, specific picture of the man you're meant to be. When host Corey Baum wrote his own eulogy from his son's perspective, it became more than a writing exercise—it became a mirror forcing him to confront who he had been and choose who he would become.


The most powerful shift happens when you stop writing about the man you hope to be someday and start speaking as the man who's already here, just waiting for permission to lead. Your vision needs specific details that make it tangible: not "I want to be present" but "I sit on the floor building Legos with my kids before school, phone away, fully engaged." This specificity turns abstract wishes into a compass that guides your decisions when life feels chaotic.


Your vision already exists in the contrast between what drains you and what lights you up—those aren't just emotions, they're data points showing you the way forward. Identity isn't built through dreaming but through demonstration, taking one sentence from your vision and embodying it today. Because the truth is, the man you're becoming isn't waiting for more time—he's waiting for you to claim him as yours right now.


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Speaker 1:

You're listening to the Evolve Men Podcast, episode number 11. Most men drift through life, reacting, adjusting, tolerating, but never actually deciding who they want to be. But what if the life that you're craving doesn't start with hustle or productivity, but with a clear vision of the man that you're becoming? Today, we're not talking about goals. We're talking about direction, about identity and finally stepping into a life that feels like yours. I'm Corey Baum, founder of the Evolve Men Project and this podcast. I help men lead themselves boldly, build real confidence and live with purpose. This show isn't about being impressive. It's about being honest with yourself and with the life that you're building, because you don't need more motivation, you need clarity, and when you're clear on your vision, you stop drifting and start leading what's up. Men? Today we're talking about what it means to lead yourself when everything around you feels uncertain, unstable or just out of control. When the world feels chaotic right. Your vision becomes more than just an idea. It becomes a weapon, a compass, a way to anchor yourself in who you are and where you're going, even when the path ahead isn't clear. Right. This episode is about how to create that vision and use it to lead yourself forward when it would be easier to shrink or to react or to run right.

Speaker 1:

For a long time, I didn't have a clear vision for my life. Right, I was chasing sparks, whatever lit me up in the moment, but there was no real direction, no destination, just noise. I wasn't guided by values, I wasn't building something lasting, I was just reacting most of the time and, honestly, I didn't even realize anything was missing until anything was missing. Until finally, kind of, one day I did so a few years ago I sat down and wrote something that changed everything for me. I wrote my own eulogy from the perspective of my oldest son, corbin, and I didn't hold back, right, I wrote it as if he were standing up there talking about the kind of father that I had been right, the kind of man that I had been to him and to the world. Right, but to him it was about connection and integrity and leadership and accountability and commitment. It was full of details, right, bedtime talks, morning laughs, the way that I handled my mistakes, the adventures that we had chased, the lessons that I'd left behind. Right, some of it was who I already was right, but most of it was who it was that I wanted to be. But, reading it back. Something really cracked open in me, right, because for the first time, I wasn't just guessing at like a vague idea of success. I actually got to feel the kind of man that I wanted to become and, more importantly, I saw how far off I was from that man. And that eulogy wasn't just a writing exercise for me, it was a mirror, right, and it forced me to confront who it was that I had been up to that point and to choose who it was that I was going to be from that day forward, right, that I was going to be from that date forward, right.

Speaker 1:

And that's what today is about Not not about writing you know, a perfect sentence that you can post on Instagram, but but tapping into the truth of who you really want to be, you know, and, and what it is that you want your life to mean. Because the moment that you start living with that kind of clarity, because the moment that you start living with that kind of clarity, everything starts to change. So today we're talking about vision, and not just the kind that you hang on a wall or you bury in some Google Doc on your hard drive. I'm talking about the kind of vision that grabs you by the chest, right. That wakes something up in you and makes you want to move, to get up into the morning, to be the man that you're meant to be. Because here's the truth that most men live reactively. They let life decide who they become, one convenience, one distraction, one choice at a time, and then they wake up one day and wonder how the hell they got there. But when you're clear on your vision, when you stop drifting and you stop tolerating, you start leading your life on purpose, and that vision becomes your compass. And it doesn't have to be perfect, it doesn't have to be polished, but it does have to be real. And when it's real, when it's specific and grounded and emotionally charged, it changes everything. You move differently, you speak differently, you show up differently. Differently, you show up differently. And so that's what we're diving into today, not as some abstract idea, but as a powerful, concrete shift in identity, because the man that you're becoming isn't found in your goals, he's found in the clarity of your vision.

Speaker 1:

So let's start with the truth. Right, most men never create a vision for their life. Right, they might have goals or deadlines, to-do lists, but a vision like a clear, emotionally resonant picture of who it is that they're becoming resonant picture of who it is that they're becoming. That's rare and it shows right. Without a vision, life just becomes reactive. You move from moment to moment, pulled by you know, whatever is urgent instead of what's actually meaningful for you. You get stuck in survival mode. You tolerate things that don't align, you chase things that aren't actually yours to begin with. And it's not because you're lazy, it's because you're unclear. And clarity you know I say this time and time again that clarity doesn't come from more planning. It comes from getting honest about what really matters to you, what's important to you. So if your life feels fragmented or hollow, it's not because you're broken, it's because you're living without a picture of who you're here to become. But we can change that today.

Speaker 1:

So here's the mistake that a lot of men make they try to write their vision like a corporate mission statement on some sort of letterhead. It's clean and safe and vague, something that sounds really good. Hr has gone over it like it's perfect. But a real vision is raw and it's specific and it's you. Vision is raw and it's specific and it's you. It only has to be a few paragraphs that, when you read them, make something in your chest tighten right. You feel it in your body, a little scared, a little excited, and you know that it's the man inside you trying to come through. So forget being impressive. Forget what sounds right. Write what feels right to you, right. So, as an example, maybe it's like I'm the kind of man who dot dot dot right. Or my days feel like my partner and kids know me as such, right? So think about it like this If your vision, if your vision, wouldn't make sense to a six-year-old, then it's not clear enough.

Speaker 1:

So, instead of saying I want to be a present father, say something more like you know, every morning I sit on the floor with my kids and I build Legos before school. I put my phone down, I connect with them, I ask them questions and I actually listen. Instead of just saying something like I want to be successful, you can say you know, I run a business that helps people solve real problems. I work four hours a week. I leave work feeling energized, not empty. I take Fridays off to go hiking with my dog.

Speaker 1:

Instead of saying something like I want to be in great shape, you can say something like I wake up at 6 am, right, I stretch while the coffee's brewing. I lift heavy weights three times a week. I look in the mirror and I like what I see, right, if your vision is vague, then it won't actually move you. If it's generic, it won't challenge you, and if it sounds like something that you read in a self-help book, it won't belong to you. The trick here is that it has to be yours right. So stiff or strip out all of the fluff, right, write it like you're handing it to your six-year-old kid, right, and you're saying like hey, look, this is what daddy's building, this is who daddy wants to become, because that's how real it should feel to you tangible and lived in, and yours right.

Speaker 1:

So your vision doesn't have to come out of nowhere, right, it's already hiding in plain sight in the things that drain you, in the things that light you up, in the parts of your life where something just feels off and in the moments where you feel fully you right. You don't need to start from scratch. You've already been collecting evidence along the way. Every time that you've felt misaligned or resentful or disconnected, that was a clue. Every time that you felt proud or grounded or just fully alive in yourself, that was also a clue, right. In those moments, that contrast, it's not just emotion, it's data. Right, you've been living inside this feedback loop and the only question is whether you've been listening, right? So this is where pattern recognition meets self-leadership.

Speaker 1:

When you start noticing what feels aligned and what doesn't, you begin training your nervous system to recognize truth, right, you begin building your compass, right. So I want you to grab a pen and write something down, right, write, write down what's one area of your life that energizes you right now. What's one thing that you keep putting up with that drains you? Where are you already showing signs of the man that that you want to become? Right? And these aren't just journal prompts, they're breadcrumbs breadcrumbs to follow, right. And your vision starts to write itself when you start following them, right.

Speaker 1:

So write it like as if it's already true, because the most powerful shift comes when you stop writing about the man that you hope to be one day and you start speaking from the man who's already here right now, right Underneath the noise and the fear and the hesitation. Right, this isn't, this isn't a fantasy, right, this is actual, real identity work, right. So write your vision in the present tense. So, not like I want to or someday, but instead, like I am subtle shift grammatically is a massive shift neurologically. Your brain responds to declaration and your body responds to embodiment, and in your life it begins to organize itself around the identity that, the identity that you're willing to own.

Speaker 1:

Right, this isn't about lying to yourself. This is about choosing to live in alignment with who you're becoming, starting now. So, as an example, right, a couple of them could be that you know I am a present and playful father. I wake up feeling grounded and clear, I lead with integrity, even when it's uncomfortable, and I move through life on purpose. So let these words stretch you.

Speaker 1:

Right? They should feel like both a mix of truth and challenge. Right, like you're stepping into a larger frame and you don't have to be perfect at it. Challenge, right, like you're stepping into a larger frame and you don't have to be perfect at it yet. Right, you don't have to embody all of it yet. Right, but you need to see it clearly enough that you know what direction to move in. So speak it like it's already yours, because it is that truth isn't some distant stranger, right? He's just waiting for you to stop hesitating and actually let him lead, right? So this is your first draft, right. It's not supposed to be polished, it's supposed to be honest, right? If your vision doesn't make your voice catch just a little bit when you read it out loud, if it doesn't feel vulnerable, if it doesn't light a fire and poke at your fear at the same time, then go deeper. The right vision won't just inspire you, it'll call you forward.

Speaker 1:

So here are a few coaching questions to sit with, right, and you can journal them, you can speak them into a voice note, if that's your thing, or just hold them quietly and really let the answers come when they're ready. Right? And the first one is this who is the man that I'm becoming? Right If I stop waiting? Right, not someday, if not if everything goes perfectly right, but right now, today. Who am I ready to step into?

Speaker 1:

The next question is what does my life actually look like when I live from that version of me? How do I move? How do I speak? How do I show up in relationships? How do my mornings feel? What does my presence create in the world around me? What does my presence create in the world around me? And the next one is where am I still being vague, because clarity would require change. What am I afraid to claim, because it would mean letting go of comfort or disappointing something else. So question number four is if my six-year-old self read my vision, would he understand it? Would he feel proud of it? Would he believe that I meant it?

Speaker 1:

And the last question is what's one sentence that I could write today that feels bold, clear and completely mine? Just one sentence that says this is who I am now. And you don't have to answer all of these at once, but just one honest answer, one truth that you're willing to write down and own can change everything, right? So let's reframe something that's held a lot of men back for a long time, and that's that you don't need more time, you need more truth. You don't need to figure it all out, you just need to decide who it is that you're willing to become and start moving like you mean it.

Speaker 1:

Too many men keep waiting for the perfect moment to step into their vision, but the perfect moment never comes. I mean, we all know that. And the longer that you wait, the more that you reinforce the identity of a man who waits, right. But here's the truth you already know what kind of man that you want to be, right. You've felt him, you've imagined him, you've written him in, you know, you've written pieces of him down and now it's time to start acting like him. You've written pieces of him down and now it's time to start acting like him, even if it's just small ways, because identity isn't built through dreaming. It's built through demonstration, right?

Speaker 1:

So here's your challenge for the week, right? Write your vision today. Not the polished version, not the someday version, the real one, the one that makes your heart race a little bit, the one that you'd be proud to hand to your son, and then read it out loud, feel what it stirs in you and pick one sentence from that vision. And I want you to live it this week, because vision without action is just a fantasy, but vision tied to embodiment, that's leadership and that's how you become the man that you're meant to be. One sentence, one decision, one bold act at a time. All right, guys.

Speaker 1:

So if this stirred something in you today, if you're ready to stop drifting and actually start living with direction, then let's talk. This is the kind of work that I do with men every day, helping them and get honest, get clear and lead themselves with intention. If you want support creating your vision and living it out day by day. Book a free discovery call with me at wwwevolvemenprojectcom. There's no pitch, no pressure, just a real conversation about what's possible when you stop waiting for clarity and start creating it.

Speaker 1:

And if this episode resonated with you, share it with someone. Leave a five-star review, follow the show. That's how this message spreads, one man at a time. So I want you to remember this right your life isn't shaped by what you wish for. It's shaped by what you claim. Not next year, not when things settle down, but now. The man that you're becoming is already inside you and he's not waiting for more time. He's waiting for your permission, right. So write your vision right, speak it out loud and start living like the kind of man who leads, not just reacts. You've got this. Thanks for listening to the Evolve Men podcast. I'll see you next time.

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