Neeza Powers Detransition Story: Identity Crisis Leads To Christ

His story isn’t just about leaving behind a false identity—it’s about discovering the truth of who he was created to be in God’s image. This conversation will challenge cultural norms, offer hope to the hurting, and shine a light on the transformative power of the Gospel.

You can find Neeza on Tik Tok as Neeza Powers username @dreamroulette and on YouTube as Neeza Powers! Support him by following, subscribing, liking and commenting! 

Transcript

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How are you? My name's Ebenezer. Before I met you, I used to live as a woman. Okay. I go by Za, but my name is Ebenezer, but it used to be Nicole. Do you mind if I ask you a question? I wanna share something kind of personal. Do you know what a detransition is? Gather around God's and move them all over town. Good news, gossip, spreading hope and life. Good news, gossip, making, dark day. Every testimony, every story. True God's do. Welcome back. Good News, gossipers. This is the podcast where we share real stories of hope, redemption, and the life-changing power of Jesus Christ. Today's guest is someone who is boldly using his voice to share a story that few have the courage to tell. He's a social media influencer. And he's a truth teller. Someone who once lived a life as a woman, but through the grace of God has found his true identity in Christ With boldness and humility, he's opening up about his journey of det transitioning the emotional and spiritual battles that he's faced, and how his new found faith in Jesus has brought him healing, clarity and peace. This conversation is honest, heartfelt, and a powerful testimony of God's ability to redeem, restore, and reveal truth. Get ready to be challenged, encouraged, and inspired. Let's welcome our guest, za to the show. I gotta be honest with you. I felt so drawn to your page for such a long time and when I first came across you, I was like, there is something about him that is just, I don't know. I'm just so glad you got to. See my video and sit down and talk to us. Yeah. I told you that's kind of the way that people can reach me. I get thousands of messages and it's hard to read through all the comments, but if someone takes the time to make a video and tags my name, I'm like, oh, you know, let me look at that. And you came up and you seem like a really sweet and, genuine person. So let me reach out to her. Yes. I'm so glad. Yeah, so this is our first remote interview. So I appreciate your patience with our technical stuff. But, yeah, we have only been doing this for what, since March. March was our first job. Yeah. Well, I love the studio. It looks great. Thanks. Charity designed it. Me and my mom. Yeah, it looks really nice. So I'm really, really excited that, you're, have you found the Lord? Are you saved?'cause I don't, I wasn't sure. I am. So, it's funny, a lot of times people automatically realize that, oh, here's this detransition or talking about Jesus. That must be his motivation. And I realize now it kind of is. But I didn't think that being saved was my motivation for det transitioning. But seven months prior to me coming out and, as a man and loving myself for, for my God-given design, I did accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior. But seven months went by. I had moved to a different state. I completely forgot about it. I made this promise after I made that proclamation that I was gonna look into, you know, his word and everything, and I forgot about it. And then seven months later I was just hit with this, this brick of reality that I had been living a lie and. Three months into that detransition, I started to remember those promises I made to the Lord. Wow. So you asked him to come into your heart and he lives in your heart. I just wanted to make very clear just because, you know, just because I care about you. Yeah, I appreciate that. There was these two random guys I was playing tennis with and in DC I lived in DC for about six months and they were evangelists where they would go out on the streets and speak about God's word. And I was interested and I was like, so what do you have to do to become a Christian? Like what is it? You know, do I have to go to classes every week or, you know, grow up in a Christian household? And they're like, no, you just have to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. And I'm like, well, how do you know? And they're like, well, you'll just know. And after learning more and more about, his word and his miracles and more, he did, I made that proclamation without knowing too much. And then, like I said, amen. Forgot about it for seven months. But here I am now. Praise the Lord. I'm so glad that you're posting about it online and I'm, watching your page'cause I'm so encouraged by it, honestly. And I'll keep supporting it because it's such a good story. I have only seen the good comments. I've only seen positive, I've only seen people uplifting you. I needed to see that. I love your page because of that. You get on TikTok and it's just. Bad news, bad news, bad news. Like this is going wrong. But keep doing what you're doing because honestly, it's making a difference. I'll tell you personally, it's making a difference in my life, so just keep doing it. Thanks, God. Thank you so much. Yeah, it's true. There's a lot of, you know, I always wish for a big family, and now I think I have the biggest family with all brothers and sisters in Christ, and I just feel at home when I'm talking about him because people will come and show support and I have TikTok live sometimes, and I'm just, I don't call it bible study, I just call it like, Bible reveling because I read these words, I've never read them before, and I'm like, oh my goodness. Like this is. I mean, every word moves me. It's amazing. So the kind of support that, I've been receiving, showing my giddiness, to coming into Christ is really exciting to see too. What a beautiful thing. 100%. Yeah. And it comes through, it really does. Like, and that's what, and you're, you said you learn these words and you're, you're like, you're moved by them. Well, the Holy Spirit is something that is the driving force between, that, that's what connects us all. Right. Because as a Christian, we believe in the Trinity, the Father, son, the Holy Ghost. And the Holy Spirit is the part of Jesus that lives in each of us. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And it's like our, I am gonna get really off the rails here for a second because it's so heavy on my mind. But I've been listening to another podcast called The Telepathy Tapes, and I'm plugging it right now because it is so good. Everybody needs to listen to it. Okay. But it's about autistic children who I've worked with, having the ability to like, to use, ESP and that kind of thing. And it goes back to God, this podcast is like gonna talk about God. Okay? And I'm like waiting for it to get there. But that's what I go back to is like, that to me is the Holy Spirit. These unexplainable phenomenon that happens is like the Lord working. You don't, you don't realize it. Because if you're in the world and you only know like the worldly perspective, you're gonna think, okay, well science is just like explaining God. Basically God created all these things and science is the study of him basically and all his creation. So I just wanna bring that up because it's crazy that all these different things in the world, but it all goes back to God. Really? 100%. The Holy Spirit's just working in everybody's lives as a Christian to come together. I mean, we'll have the same goal to bring more people in, to get that hole in their heart filled by the Lord Jesus Christ, where they're not gonna go to hell anymore. They're gonna go to heaven, and they can live, on heaven and earth we don't have to wait for heaven to live great lives, fulfill lives and rich lives, every single day. And Jesus said when he went to die on the cross, that he was sinning someone far better. And that is the Holy Spirit. And I'm thankful for that. So, yeah, I didn't even know, again, I've been a Christian for, actually a real Christian for like nine days where I've realized that this is my, my, my faith and, and what I wanna devote my life to. But I didn't know what the Holy Spirit was until a few days ago I was listening to worship music. Which I always thought was kind of corny until I realized how amazing it is, right? Like, not growing up in a, in a Christian household, you kind of are taught to think almost less of, of Christians, right? Like, oh, they're just a bunch of Bible thumping, you know, holy rollers. My parents used to say, yeah. And now I turn on like Brandon Lake or Elevation Worship, and I'm like, I just feel all these goosebumps all the time. And someone's like, that's the Holy Spirit. I'm like, well, what is it? And then I started reading in the Bible and I still didn't understand, I kind of just show transparently my ignorance towards all this every day. But like also at the same time, being an utter awe of it. I think I'll probably be lost for a long time with what all these things mean and I'm so jealous of people who got to grow up learning about all this. Hey, it says in the Bible if you think that you have learned everything in the Bible, that you're ignorant because you could read it the rest of your life and you're not gonna be able to fathom everything that God's trying to tell you. Mm-hmm. But, um, I guess that being said, I'm curious if you have any questions'cause I, your girl's ready to answer any way I can do to help you learn faster? Yeah. You know, I think my biggest questions now revolve around denominations and like where to find church homes and things like that. I do live out in the middle of nowhere and there are churches, very few and far between. And I went to one last Sunday and I just didn't have that goosebump feeling, you know, that I do when I'm listening to worship music or reading the Bible. It just, felt kind of flat, I was anxious the whole time. I was looking at my watch, like, when are we gonna get outta here? I didn't feel welcome what denomination was it? I think it was Baptist. I'm not sure. I have to double check. It was just called something Bible church. So I know it was a Bible teaching church. Mm-hmm. But it may have just been an off day, you know, they were, I, I got to witness a, a baptism, which was amazing. I've never seen that before. Yes. That is so beautiful. The pastor was baptizing his 18-year-old son. He was going off to college and yeah. I, I never saw that happen before. So that was, that was awesome. Hey, go ahead. Are you speaking on baptism? Yeah. Have you been baptized? No, I have not. No. Okay. I'm, I've been considering, getting rebaptized and let me explain that. I got baptized when I was really young. Went through school, did a lot of things that I knew were sins, went through college, did a whole lot of things against the Lord that would truly, a lot of things that I can easily say. I wanna rededicate my life to the Lord. And you can get baptized, any demonic oppression that you have connected to that from, just not honoring the Lord and opening up those doors, washed away in a moment. Washed away. You, you die and you come back. You're a new person. Just really feel it. Let, let me tell you, there's gonna be times in your Christian walk where you don't feel it, and you're like, where are you, God. And there'll be moments like that. But I will say I definitely believe in the power of baptism and, how it literally washes away everything. Mm. And you get to just be new. Any, like you say, I wanna be new. I'm tired of everything that I've been through. I want, I don't want that weight baptized. And what, I mean, like, it's a, you, you feel this like right away, like right when you come out of the water. Like how does it feel you? Yes. Really, I will say just like a preface is to know in your heart that that's, that's what you want is Jesus in pursuit of him. Because I, the same thing, I've been baptized without fully understanding my actions. I just got it baptized.'cause I, it's like everybody's been baptized every, let's go get, let's go get in the water like the cool thing to do. But you, I really felt that you've accepted Jesus and Right. And BTI being baptized is not being saved. It's just mm-hmm. Jesus got baptized. Yeah. If Jesus, someone walked on the earth and never sinned and died in the Jesus, I didn't know that. Yes. By Paul. Okay. Okay. Is it Paul the Baptist? Or who was the Baptist? John the Baptist. John the Baptist. John the Baptist. The only reason I know that is because I've been watching the chosen. Yes. And you know John the Baptist is Jesus's cousin. I did not know that. And he was literally born and raised in his specific job was to start the way for Jesus. So if you're watching the chosen, you'll see this. And it's like, no, you can ruin this. You can ruin this. Fine. But, but when you see this on the Chosen, I was a wreck. Because really you see their familial attachment and you're like, they're people. Jesus had a, he's a person, he's a person that came down here and lived a perfect life. He wasn't God, he was living as a person. He didn't have any extra powers. He didn't have anything besides everything that we have right now, except for we have more. We have the Bible and we have the Holy Spirit, and we have Jesus sitting on God's right hand. And for him to help us out. But no, like knowing that, like, Jesus didn't get to get married and have kids and live out his life. He came and us. You know, and that's all he is ever did. So, Tyra, I love you. I'm a crier. I'll don't cry at some point too. You know, it's funny that you're, just crying and open. I never, I never kind of was an emotional person until I accepted Christ. I really wasn't, I kind of just felt pretty numb to a lot of things, you know? Yeah. And relatable. But I love, I, what really strikes me, oh, just in general about being a Christian, if I'm gonna summarize what it means is just to love people. You just love'em. And that, that opens your heart up to all these different emotions. Like before, before we even recorded this, we were having like a therapy session a little bit. Oh goodness. With charity's mom. And it was so sweet. It was just like, but when you're, when you're like having to hold yourself accountable to like the one true God. You have to, I don't know. I just feel like you lay it all out there and you're just raw and you're vulnerable all the time. Right. Yeah. And also, I'm glad your mom had that moment. Because it, it, my mom's a crier. She asked for my advice, I told her, and it hurt her feelings. And, and I, and everything was set outta love, but, you know. Yeah. Mm-hmm. But anyways, I think it's all gonna be for the good because, you know, I say everything outta love that I say towards to my mom. I love her so much. So, and this, this is something I really wanted to hit home with you about because your, your whole testimony is on the fact that you were, you're a man, but you wanted to be a woman and you played in a woman's sport golf, is that right? Yep. So that's when I first like, saw your page and I was like, oh my gosh. I just love that you were being truthful and like, even if it upset some people, you were like, I don't care. This is the reality and this is the facts of the situation. Upset a lot of people, I think, you know, I think that, being authentic is not an easy thing to do now, especially on social media. If I was, yeah, coming on here and talking about days of girlhood and all of these other things that, you know, people do it, it's easier to get on board with because it's not real, you know, like, it's easy to love Jasmine and Pocahontas on Halloween because they're just costumes. Like it's fun. But as soon as somebody says, look like this is me, I have no filter on, these are my mistakes. I'm kind of embarrassed by them, but I realize now it was just a necessary journey, but this is just me. It's like, oh, I don't know if I like that so much because it starts to expose all the things that you might feel uncomfortable about within yourself. But if you're just supporting a character, you don't really have any personal connection. I'm so glad to hear that perspective because I've been asking myself and trying to put myself in other people's shoes and I just, it's hard as a Christian and what I never want to do as a Christian is to cut people off. From the love of Christ, just because I don't agree with their sin. Yeah, there's some people I follow on social media that I don't know if I'll ever have the strength to do, that'll go out on the street and pray with drug addicts and hold their hands. I'm like, you know, I don't know if I could do that. Scares, that scares me. But the one thing I do know how to do is to put myself into the shoes of people thinking that they were born in the wrong body and gender dysphoria, because I was there. So I could definitely sit with people and sit with men who believe that there are women or women who believe there are men. I looked everywhere for a different identity before I found one in Christ. I looked for one as a woman. I looked for one as a golfer, as a dancer, as a cheerleader, all these different things throughout my life. But none of them stuck. None of them were real. But as soon as I just said, look, I don't wanna look for an identity here. On Earth. I'll just look for the only one that matters. Things started really connecting for me. Praise the Lord. And can I say that I really feel like. I am so excited for what your future's gonna look like. I'm sure that you plan for a family now, or do you I do. Just so excited. You have to have a big call in your life, or the devil wouldn't have worked so hard to try to confuse you and keep you from the Lord. And I truly believe that the people that are gonna have such a big impact, the devil's like, okay, them, let's make sure take them out. They're gonna help too many people. Let's try to get'em off on anything else. And I am so, so, so excited to see I got those goose, I got those goosebumps I talk about here now. I love that. Yeah. I, I appreciate that. You know, I talk about this dream to, to people. I have, you know, trans people to reach out to me over social media all the time and, and they're like, you know, I, I don't think this is the right path. What do I do? What should I, what should I do? And I talk about this dream I had where I was in a field and, there's a fence that's separating this, this beautiful field. And on one side of the fence, I'm with God, and I feel just that warmth and that peace all over. But on the other side of the fence, I see all these things I want, I see all these clothes and new sports cars and this house on the mountains, and I'm thinking, you know what? I'm just gonna go sit on the fence. And the devil came to me and he said, you know what? I own the fence too. Rock. And I said, oh no, I gotta get, let me get away from this fence. Yeah. Wow. So I just try and sit back in peace and realize things are gonna come to me when they come to me. I'm not gonna have a million followers tomorrow. I'm not gonna have a sports car that's ever, maybe, who knows? But things are gonna come to me when they come to me. And as, as soon as I, just fulfill the mission that I'm, I'm sent here to fulfill. Hey, the Lord, the Lord wants to give you everything that you want and more, as long as it lines up with the will. Yeah. And we, I truly believe, like if you're a giver, and you pay tithe to whatever it is gonna get rewarded for that. And, um, well, we'll say our last message last Sunday was over, which you should get on our Facebook and you can watch our church live on Facebook if you want. Okay. Okay. So you can be part of our church, but, um, um, I don't know where I was going. You said something about paying ties and then your message on the, the message last Sunday said was over. Oh yeah. The message last Sunday. It was on, like just being like thankful for what you have it. But first it was talking about like last Sunday was how much God wants you to be blessed. Mm-hmm. And then, this last sermon went over, just being thankful for what you have and being frugal for what you have. And like, if you don't pay tithes when you have a little, you're not gonna pay tithe when you have a lot. But I truly believe, like the Lord does want us bless as Christians, he wants us to have everything that we want and need and be able to give to people. And I truly believe that if you're serving him like you are, you ask, it will come. I truly believe that. And, the Lord is faithful to those that are faithful to him. And so, yeah, I love that. You know, I, I, it reminds me of, again, I've been reading the Bible for nine days, so I don't know everything about it, but I remember when Jesus was speaking to a rich man and the rich man is seeking salvation. And Jesus says, give away everything you have to the poor and follow me. And I don't have riches to give away. But the one thing I did have to give away was that trans identity and. I gave it away. And I'm just gonna follow that. Giving yourself is worth more than anything you could ever give to the Lord. Yeah.'cause he just, you know, he loves each of us so much and yeah. That's just something I love so much. The love of God. Listen to that song and try not to cry. The last verse of the love of God was written by a man that was locked up in a psych ward and it's so beautiful.'cause you're like, there's no way this guy was crazy. Or if he was, how did he know the love of God? Still so much, but the Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit. Amen. I wanted to ask, if you're comfortable answering this and if you just wanna answer it and we cut it out of the podcast, like you just wanna, you can ask whatever. I'm an open book. Okay. I just wanted to ask how far you got into your transition. Yeah. So 12 years of living as this woman named Nicole. I started when I was 16, 17-year-old boy. I, yeah, I mean, it was a never ending road of do I need to take this amount of hormones? Do I need to do that? And, and luckily I've always been really skeptical of the medical community. You know, I never kind of trusted too much about what they said, especially when it came to something where I knew that this dysphoria, I just knew somehow that I couldn't be trapped in the wrong body. But, but yeah, I did take hormones in that 12 years, not, not thankfully at the required dosage, right? But if you're gonna be a part of this community that's trans community, and you don't follow these steps of like you need to take hormones, you need to schedule out surgeries, you're not gonna be welcomed. So no, I didn't perform any surgeries on my body, but throughout those 12 years. There were months or weeks at a time where I would take estrogen, because I thought that this is where I would find happiness as if my body started aligning more with this dysphoria that I had. But all along I just needed to figure out the fact that, there was nothing wrong with my body. I just needed to get on board with this new identity. But yeah, that's a question that's asked all the time. Like, what all did you do? No, I didn't do surgeries. but yes, I did do, hormones, on and off for a long time. Yeah. Well, thank you for being honest. That's, and I am so glad too because some of the, I mean, some of the things you do to your body is irreversible and it's, yeah. I watched this, documentary, and this person can be controversial, but it was a good documentary. Matt Walsh did a documentary on, what is it? It's called, what Is a Woman? It was kind of funny actually. But it was serious in the, in the way that like that some of the people he was talking to are medically licensed and they're being so irresponsible with the sterilization of children. That's what it is when you, and that's a weapon from the devil because guess what? Children or heritage children's are God's way of having more and spreading the word. And like, you know, that's the whole point of like, that's why you'll see like Christian families probably mo like a lot I can, I'm 10 of 11 children. Oh my goodness. Yeah. 10 11. 10 of 11. Mom, you that the only thing I know about Christian families is seventh Heaven. That show? Seventh Heaven. Seventh Heaven. What is that? I love that. I get it. You don't, you've never seen Seventh Heaven? I don't guess so. You gotta watch it, girl. Okay. You gotta watch it. You know, there's no bad feel. It's a great show. It's from the nineties I think, but yeah, it's just about like, a reverend in his kids I think. And it's called Seventh Heaven'cause there's seven of'em. Oh, okay. Cool. Well, I love growing up with a big family, but I do truly believe, like, you know, each person is so valuable to God. And if my parents would've stopped at nine kids, I wouldn't have been here. And that's why I just think like I wouldn't have so many kids. Me and my husband have been trying to have kids for a while and I had a miscarriage last year, so pray for me. Wow.'cause I'm so ready to have kids. We're about to start foster care, but and that's what I feel. I feel like the devil is going to attack people in the areas that they really wanna grow the most. They're gonna trot their very best. Yeah. But I do feel like this, dysphoria like that is straight from the devil.'cause he wants you in confusion.'cause if you are not walking in the truth of God, you are going to be lost. You're not gonna be. Like, you're not gonna be in spiritual health. And it's a proven fact. Science is catching up now. You can read the Bible and like people's health from reading the Bible is just, they're doing big, huge studies of people that take this medicine and don't read the Bible and take this medicine, do it is actually life and health to your bones. It's literally you're gonna grow new bone marrow because you read the Bible. Wow. And I just thank God for that so much because, like what you can worship and literally get more blessed because you sung a worship song. And not just because it felt good, but because you'll actually be more blessed and you're opening up the doors to be more blessed, by the Lord a lot of people ask me like, well, I'm happy living as, as a woman, I'm happy living as a man, you know, and you know, your happiness is not my happiness and your truth is not my truth. But I always tell them that it's not my truth. Like this is the truth. Amen. You know, it's not my truth. Me as a man is not, is not just me. That's the image I was created in. It's not, this isn't a subjective thing. And if you asked me five years ago, six years ago, if I was happy, I would've said, yeah, I'm happy I'm living as a woman. I'm living in my truth. But I just didn't know real happiness. Right? Because I hadn't known fullness the love of the Lord yet, and that that's real happiness. So I just tell them like, oh, if you're happy now. Do you wanna at least give it a chance and just see how it feels? Because I think you might change, change your tune a little bit when you do. Yeah. And it's so hard, and I, I have this feeling you're gonna come across this if you haven't already, but like, people who are so hesitant to accept Christ or like, this is just a personal thing for me. My uncle he is a good, he is a good person. He has a good heart, but he will shut down any conversation about God. I was just having this conversation with my dad yesterday. I said, talking about the same thing, people who don't believe we want them to believe, and they're just so, like, anti-God. Yeah. They don't wanna hear it. It's like, but what do you have to lose? It must be so depressing to live a life where you have no hope. You're hoping in the world. Well, that's kind of, yeah. I mean, it's. Going downhill fast, but God, gives us hope. It's just if you come across that, I think it's cool to not believe now amongst kids. Like, it's seen as like a badge of modern day, culture. Let's, be atheist. Let's not believe these friends of yours who are encouraging that, they're not gonna give you the same kind of love that Christ will, so I think that we need to start, making it cool, you know? I don't know if that's ever gonna be something that's able to be done because growing up, I'll tell you, that's the last thing I thought was cool is like, you know, people that, would go to the church camps and the Bible schools and things like that, I'm like, you know, but secretly I was like. Look at how perfect their family is. Like they get all dressed up on Sunday, like, I want that too. But then I would just laugh and be like, oh, look at him. He is going to vacation Bible school. What a loser. Right. And I think that is such a goal to have is to make Geez, and I think you're doing a great job of showing It is cool. It is fun, and it is so cool and fun to follow Jesus. And when you do, you're not thinking of what other people think really. And that is one thing that we do get past for sure. I have a friend that I've had for so long that is a Christian, but she doesn't, she's gay. She knows the Lord. And there's a difference between knowing the Lord. The Bible says, the demons know my scripture. Knowing scripture and knowing that Jesus exists doesn't make you save, but fall. Like for one, just His grace saved you. So saying, I believe your God. I believe Jesus died on the cross for my sins. I confess him, Lord. Okay. You're safe. Bam. I wanted to read the scripture specifically. Do it because this just, it, everything you just said and everything we're talking about. James, four, four says, ye adulterers in adulterous. No, ye this is King James version, so I apologize. But no, ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God, whosoever, therefore will be a friend of the world, is an enemy of God. Not just that, that hits me because Christianity at the heart of it is just loving people, loving them well, but you don't love their sin. You want their sin to be gone because you love them, right? Yeah. And that gets misinterpreted for hatred and judgment and bigotry and like, it's not, it's not that at all. It's like, I love you so much as a sister or brother in Christ. Like I want you to know the truth about what God thinks about you and how he feels about you. If you are walking this way, God is not happy with that. He doesn't want say, send a son to die for our sins. Why are you just like, you know, you're kind of like. Um, spinning in his face, basically, but, right. Well, a lot of people, like I've heard it said like this, when people are said, I'm born this way. Well, I heard a girl say, yeah, you might really feel like you were born that way and have those feelings, but that doesn't make it right. And it doesn't make it the truth. Driven by when I lived in a bigger city, churches that had gay flags outside of them and trans flags. And I think it's great to welcome everybody and love everybody. But I made a post about this. I hope that you're still preaching to give up these earthly identities for your walk with Christ. Like again, I had no riches. I wasn't the rich man talking to Jesus. I had no riches to give to the poor. But I did have this one thing and this thing that I held onto, this idea that I was going to defy who I was meant to be for, for what my earthly desires of looking like a woman. Like that's the one thing I had to give up. So I hope that those churches, that, that do fly the gay flags outside and all that, I think it's great. Let's bring those people need to hear God's word. Absolutely. Right. But, but we shouldn't be preaching that, you know. To, to hold onto these identities is okay. I completely agree. I, I agree One thing I do wanna bring up, because I saw your video about going golfing with men. Yeah, yeah. And it went well. Yeah. That was, you know, that's something I could have never imagined doing. Especially that's, you know, I played in the women's professional golf league, you know, my whole identity with golf was like, a woman who golfs and everything. So, yeah, it went well. I will tell you that, it's different. Like, I feel like, I don't know, I still feel maybe that I'm not accepted by men as, as like I'd like to be. So I'm still kind of navigating that. Again, I, I, I don't know. I gotta not worry about that. But, but yeah, it was just strange. I guess, I wanted to give you a little bit of, I feel like I've noticed men's behavior, especially on this topic specifically, But anyways, it's what I've noticed about men is, and growing up in the south especially, is they fear what they don't know and like they have such bravado and such macho ness, and that's what, yeah. Truthfully, I'll say. Yeah. And not everyone's gonna get along. I'll tell you for sure if the man that you hung, which I love your attitude,'cause you're like, I can't worry about that. And I'm just like, you know what? Like, I can't believe that you're only a nine day old Bible reader because you're sounding like really confident in the Lord. I appreciate that. And I'm just loving that you're like on fire right now. And I just pray and believe that if there ever is a time where you don't feel the fire, that you'll just continue because you know. Last night. I'm like hanging out with these guys and I didn't have like an immediate bond with them. They're, you know, I'm. Again, just kind of more feminine, I think, than some guys, which is okay, but we're on like the fifth or sixth hole and to add sort of fuel to the fire, I'm like, so like, do you guys go to church? And yeah, like I had this conversation and they were like, no. And I was like, oh, okay. Like, you know, I've been reading the bible recently and just trying to find out where everyone else that's, so keep doing that. Because look, you are, you might weed some people out, but also at the same time you're possibly planting seeds like, yeah, I bet some of those guys are gonna go home and be like, oh. This guy's reading the Bible. Maybe I should pick up the Bible. Like, you know, you never know for sure. Yeah. You know, I just feel like, if I don't alienate him enough for being like just a feminine guy, let me push him further away by trying to talk to him about Jesus. I love it. Yes. Well, I am so excited for your journey and it it, thank you. Yeah. It really sounds like you are a, you're, I think the Lord's been working on you for a long time. It really sounds like he's been, he's just had his hand, like right on you and, and just these things for probably like the things that were keeping you from living separate from him were, were drowning out. But I definitely feel like you're gonna do something, whether it's like, well, you already are. Mm-hmm. You already are. With the amount of followers that you have and the past that you've had that is so different than like, I'm not gonna be able to reach. Trans people, like you're going to be able to I have people that I'm gonna reach that you might not be able to reach. And that's, that's the beauty of it. You know, we all have our part to just go and serve the Lord and build up our treasures in heaven. But yeah, I feel like everybody has their, you know, if you're talking about how to market yourself better as a spreader of Jesus' word, I think that everybody has their own niche of what's unique to them. I mean, you were talking about me, you know, not to get personal charity, but you struggles with, you know, making a big family. You know how many people have that same exact thing, but it's almost like jumping off that ledge. I had to jump off that ledge and be like, look. This is a path I'm walking with the Lord now, nobody's gonna want to support me in it, but I just have to do it. And it's super uncomfortable. And, it's the thing that you don't wanna talk about most, that actually is right. 100% is what you should talk about. Because I actually felt really comfortable talking about being a trans woman supporting women's sports. And I, that was easy for me to do because it made sense. Like, you know, men shouldn't play in women's sports. Trans women shouldn't play in women's sports. But it was taking a step further and be like, okay, but what are you really scared about? Are you scared to live in the image that I made you in? And like, I was like, I don't wanna face that right now. And it was like, so again, seven months. And then when I finally did it was like, okay, well I don't wanna talk about that right now. So it's like the really uncomfortable things is what really you need to talk about. Hey, I agree and thank you for saying that.'Cause that's something that I really don't talk a lot about because I'm crybaby, so Yeah. Cry. Appreciate people wanna, people wanna see you cry. They, no, I'm sure they do out. I'm sure they do. It is just like, literally, it's, it's a matter of pride just getting out there and, not cry in front of school. But I know that it would, help people and I know I'm not the only person going through it, and I do know that. And so you're definitely not my best friend from school. She had, some problems and now she is eight and a half months pregnant and has a due date and yeah, she has this really large baby boy that she's about to deliver soon, so I'm very excited for her. Precious. But Kaylee, I love you. Thanks. She's a, she's a believer as well, and I met her in, in law school and she's, she's a really great, great lady. I love that. So, I'm not gonna say where you live. You told me where you live. So I'm in northern Vermont and I tell everybody I'm not scared to Okay. To say it. Yeah. Well, where you're at. See, we're, we're in Arkansas, we're southern, like Southern. We're, we're like in our own little bubble in Arkansas. Yeah. Where it's like, even we, you could throw a rock and hit another church. Right. I love that 100%. And then once you got to that church, you could pick up a rock and throw it at another church until you made it all around the town. For sure. Throwing rock at churches, stop throwing rocks at churches, guys. Come on. That's funny. Yeah. But anyways, I'm just saying that to say like, our culture is very Christian and like, sometimes it's so oversaturated Christian where you're like, you're, you're running into people who. Have their nose so far up in the air because they're like, I am such a good Christian. That they are looking down on everybody that actually needs to hear the, the Lord's message. Right. So I say that to say the area that you're in. Yes. I feel, which I don't know anything about Vermont,\ so it's actually interesting. Vermont is the least churched state in the nation. We have the least amount of churches. Like Oh, seriously? Wow. Yeah. There are, there's no churches here. Everyone I meet, they don't wanna talk about. Jesus. I don't wanna talk about the Bible. Everyone's kinda living in their own world, you know, my motto now is get outside, move your body and seek the Lord. That's where I first heard his voice was out in nature, moving, walking, hiking, people are so, obsessed with this thing. Let me just stare at the phone. It's not great. Yeah. I preach it. I agree with you. Well, listen, I definitely hope that we can remain friends because this conversation has uplifted me we're in your corner, we're praying for you. Oh, thank you. And, we're all brothers and sisters in Christ. Everybody that, is a Christian. We're all brothers and sisters and praying for one another. But I'm definitely, we're just speaking to my mom today, like, you can't expect, say, oh, you can come to me anytime and not ever build a relationship with people. Mm-hmm. So I hope that we've built enough relationship and I am here for you Absolutely. Yeah. And I believe that you're gonna be praying for me and that you're there for me as well. Yeah. I appreciate that. Yes. Yeah, let me know when it comes out so I can, I can spread the good news, gossip. For sure. Good luck on your day to talk. Gather around God's and move them all over town. Good news, gossip, spreading hope and life. Good news, gossip, making, dark day. Every testimony, every story. True God's do. Welcome back. Good News, gossipers. This is the podcast where we share real stories of hope, redemption, and the life-changing power of Jesus Christ. Today's guest is someone who is boldly using his voice to share a story that few have the courage to tell. He's a social media influencer. You can find him on TikTok, and he's a truth teller. Someone who once lived a life as a woman, but through the grace of God has found his true identity in Christ With boldness and humility, he's opening up about his journey of det transitioning the emotional and spiritual battles that he's faced, and how his new found faith in Jesus has brought him healing, clarity and peace. This conversation is honest, heartfelt, imp. This conversation is honest, heartfelt, and a powerful testimony of God's ability to redeem, restore, and reveal truth. Get ready to be challenged, encouraged, and inspired. Let's lo, let's welcome our guests to the show. This conversation is honest, heartfelt, and a powerful testimony of God's ability to redeem, restore, and reveal truth. Get ready to be challenged, encouraged, and inspired. Let's welcome our guest, za to the show.