Ep. 12 The Games We Play, Dating, & The Crock Pot Strategy

What's the difference between someone you'll date once versus someone who captures your full attention? According to our candid exploration of modern dating, it might come down to whether they teach you something meaningful about yourself, them, or the world around you.

In this unfiltered conversation, we dive into the psychology behind dating preferences, revealing that intellectual stimulation often trumps physical attraction when it comes to lasting interest. "If you don't have any substance, I'm cooked and I'm just gonna pay the bill and I'm not gonna engage ever again," one host confesses, highlighting how quickly we determine someone's potential.

We unpack "The Crock-Pot Game" – a patient, strategic approach to building attraction through small, meaningful interactions over time rather than rushing into intimacy. This counterintuitive method challenges the instant gratification culture dominating dating apps and might explain why some people effortlessly attract partners while others struggle despite their best efforts.

The episode takes an honest turn discussing dating "icks" – from superficial concerns like personal grooming to deeper issues like lacking hobbies or interests. We explore the complex psychology behind who pays on first dates, revealing that even the most independent women secretly hope men will decline their offers to split the bill. "If you let them pay, they are going to talk about you later," warns one host, pulling back the curtain on post-date discussions.

Whether you're actively dating or in a relationship, this episode offers illuminating insights into human connection that will transform how you approach romantic encounters. After all, as we conclude: dating might be "ghetto," but finding someone worth your time makes the journey worthwhile.

Ready to approach dating with newfound wisdom? Subscribe for more unfiltered conversations that challenge conventional thinking and offer practical insights for navigating relationships in today's complex world.

Transcript

Episode Introduction

Speaker 1 0:01

I heard that you was talking shit and you didn't think that I would hear it.

Speaker 2 0:06

People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up, it's bananas. Few times. I've been around that track so it's not just gonna happen. Ain't no hollabackers, it ain't no hollabackers, it ain't no hollabackers that's much that's much, that's much.

Speaker 3 0:35

I'm moving the mic. Damn, it's been a while since you've been on the mic indeed it has.

Speaker 2 0:41

I feel like this is have we actually done it like this with the mic.

Speaker 3 0:44

No, this is the first we breaking, done it like this with the mic. No, this is the first we breaking the. Yeti in.

Speaker 1 0:48

Oh.

Speaker 3 0:48

This has been. If you didn't know, it's Fat Daddy.

Speaker 1 0:52

And.

Speaker 2 0:53

Sweet.

Speaker 3 0:53

Daddy, I know you Daddy.

Speaker 2 0:55

Do the roar. But no, we definitely came back from our little hiatus.

Speaker 3 1:01

Man, where do we even start?

Speaker 2 1:03

I don't know.

Speaker 1 1:04

Okay, man, where do we?

Speaker 3 1:04

even start, I don't know okay. Okay, all right, season two, episode three we were gonna do subscriber only, but y'all ain't loyal, so we changed our mind and uh, we'll give this one for the free. Free on all distributing platforms. You don't need to know what the day or the time is. If you knew what the time was, you wouldn't believe us, but we're here we are here.

Speaker 2 1:26

We're queer the fact that you got me out here right now, at this time.

Speaker 3 1:31

We've been we've been gone for too long where we had a set schedule we're supposed to drop every sunday like clockwork life been lifin, yeah, but that that to me is like excuse city but I mean, yeah, but it's valid, though you know life be throwing hate makers, all right okay, so let's start with that.

Speaker 3 1:50

Are excuses ever really valid, even if even if it's some shit that actually happened, like like think about pursuit of happiness, right that man was getting steamrolled, right, true? And then he showed up with the paint on his pants and, like you know, his bone density scanners was getting taken from him by little hippie dudes in the park.

Speaker 2 2:09

Yeah, I remember right.

Speaker 3 2:11

I'll say that some excuses can be valid, but that doesn't mean people have to give a fuck okay like you can have a valid excuse, but that don't mean I gotta give a fuck about what you have to say so what you're saying is chad doesn't care, they just I mean, I don't mean, I got to give a fuck about what you had to say so what you're saying is chat doesn't care.

Speaker 3 2:27

I mean, I don't know Cause they be going through shit. You know what's cool about chat though. Nobody said anything. I didn't get a single Yo where's the episode?

Speaker 2 2:35

It hasn't. It hasn't been like a whole month that we've been going. It's been long right.

Speaker 3 2:39

Inconsistent.

Speaker 2 2:40

We are inconsistent as hell, that's one thing we can't say it has been a couple weeks and you just agreed that we're inconsistent. I said it has been.

Speaker 3 2:49

Yeah, I'm agreeing with you no, no, no Say it.

Speaker 2 2:52

We have been inconsistent.

Speaker 3 2:53

We are inconsistent. Just say it You're dancing.

Speaker 2 2:56

Our fucking listeners are inconsistent. How about that?

Speaker 3 3:00

No, no, no, You're doing the blame. Other people thing, I'm not, I agreed.

Speaker 2 3:04

I agreed with you.

Speaker 3 3:06

I don't know how else you want me to say it. And then you immediately came in chat.

Speaker 2 3:07

How else do you want me to say it? Hey, yeah, we've been inconsistent. Shit happens, but we're here now. We're trying to make up for it.

Speaker 3 3:15

You sound like the dude that gets caught cheating on his girl and then be trying to win like win her over again I mean, hey, shit happens what you're gonna do.

Speaker 2 3:24

I'm a man look at us and that's what y'all saying I'm a man and I you gonna leave me who, who, who says that y'all, I'll be like, get the fuck out y'all niggas, that's what y'all saying this guy, I'm a man this negro right here is quick death.

Speaker 3 3:38

Bye. You don't like me? Well, join the rest of the people that don't like me I know you tell me that all the time it's consistent. Ask any of my previous partners. I'm quick to all right, I've done a through z and you are still unsatisfied, which means to me I can't do it that might be a good segue into what we wanted to talk about right Relationships and whatnot. This is the sweets to goddess episode. I'm just here as a guest.

Speaker 2 4:11

See I don't want to call it that you quarterbacking this thing. You are Patrick Mahomes. I don't want to say this is my episode. It is, you got some stuff.

Speaker 3 4:19

You got to get off. But before we get into it, though, let's talk about you as a COO. Let's talk about that. How do you feel, really quickly?

Speaker 2 4:29

Well, for one, I still can't wrap my head around it, because that's not something For it to happen as fast as it did. It's not something that I saw happening, for me at least not yet, not this quickly.

Speaker 3 4:41

You don't feel good.

Speaker 2 4:43

Yeah, it feels good, but it's also like I don't know. Imagine you got hired for a job and you know nothing about the company really, but they hired you as the VP.

Speaker 3 4:53

That's how you feel.

Speaker 2 4:54

Almost. I feel like I'm just kind of out here figuring it out and I feel like I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough.

Speaker 3 5:06

But I feel like, as a COO, the all the things that come with it. If you look at what the role is for a small business, it's not anything too crazy. Once we start employing people, then you're gonna start feeling the pressure. Right now, you just kind of chill while the ceo, ceo does the getting the stuff off the ground and all that crap, but when there's some real admin stuff that needs to get handled, oh, I'm turning straight to you well, yeah, yeah, and I ain't gonna like, I ain't gonna leave y'all to dry.

Inconsistent Podcasters

Speaker 3 5:32

You know, I'm saying like this is how you do it, this is how you run it. This is all that. If you got questions, let me know, but you are the deciding factor on this. This is boss talk this is nuts we flexing because I think they said in one of our episodes start a business.

Speaker 3 5:48

If you have it on your heart to start a business, it sucks. That's one thing. I will say this this entrepreneur, whatever is not fun. It's not. Screw the title, screw all of it. It is not fun, even when it gets up and running. It's not fun, even the even the greatest ceos. What's his name? Daniel ek, the, the owner and ceo of spotify said that he, if he had the chance to do it again, he wouldn't do it again. And spotify is a successful business and he wouldn't do it again. That's's insightful.

Speaker 2 6:24

Do any CEOs have fun Like? Do you think of any of these?

Speaker 3 6:28

I know one, gary. He's the only one that truly enjoys it, but he also acknowledges that it sucks.

Speaker 2 6:41

How about that? To be successful, you gotta eat the shit that comes with. It sounds like you have to continue to eat shit to be successful how was your day?

Speaker 3 6:54

my day was was cool, was relaxing come on, bro, tell me how your day was. What'd you do?

Speaker 2 6:59

my day was relaxing.

Speaker 3 7:00

I'm catching up to chat. I don't know, I wasn't with her all day I, I rested for most of the day.

Speaker 2 7:06

I prayed a lot, talked to God a lot, which I feel like I haven't been doing enough lately. So I got to have me and him time, which was very much needed. I even cried a little bit about a couple of things which again I didn't realize I needed it until I did it. But that's a part of, that's a part of uh, I don't know self-care. Sometimes you just gotta cry about some shit you don't even know what you said about.

Speaker 3 7:30

That's good how would you rate your day on a scale of one to ten? Um ten being like the best day ever I mean just one to ten, ten being the best, zero being the worst.

Speaker 2 7:45

I had like a. It was like a six kind of day, oh wow, All right. Well, I had a ten. I had a ten day with the children.

Speaker 3 7:55

Before that I went to Mickey D's. I was a Wi-Fi whore for a little bit, If y'all know what I'm talking about. You only go there, order one menu item, don't get anything else, and just mooch the Wi-Fi.

Speaker 3 8:05

That's what I did, Very productive, Three hours, I think, and then that was it and came home and we went to the I forget what the museum is even called, but it's got a dinosaur exhibit and it's pretty nice, but we spent all of five minutes in there because they wanted to go to the lego section of the museum, which was cool, overstimulated, lots of stuff going on, lots of kids, lots of germs but they had fun, so that was good. And then we went and spent some time in nature, which I encourage all people to do. Just go outside and let the sun just kiss you, give you some vitamin d. That sounds crazy.

Speaker 3 8:45

Let the sun uh, minister, to your skin and then look at some grass. Go look at some water. If you're near bodies of water, here it's pretty landlocked, but we have a river that passes through, thank god, because otherwise I would go crazy. It's something about being around water that just brings me extreme comfort and peace and I need that. I didn't realize I needed that until I got to this place in 2020. And I started going crazy and then the moment I went around some water, I felt instantly better. So wherever I choose to call my forever home has to be at least 10 minutes from some water. It has to. But overall, the day was great. Got home, kids went to bed and that's it. That is it. I missed all the NBA games, saw some soccer, but USA loss yeah, you know, it was cool. Wash my butt.

Speaker 2 9:45

That's always good, that's always good.

Speaker 3 9:47

You know it was cool. Wash my butt, you know that's always good. That's always good and that's it. Now we can get into the stuff, but I'm gonna let you be this. This is not me. I'm just here for the ride and we're going to see what happens. But we talk about dating. I know we talk about dating in some capacity.

Speaker 2 10:03

This is a long-awaited topic and conflict resolution in some way or another it's gonna be in there well, I guess in dating we'll start in the beginning of dating, when you first start talking to someone, right, I see now now, hopefully, your energy loving up because you've been chilling.

Speaker 3 10:18

Well, we might have spices. I know it's, I know it's late, but come on now, don't. Don't do chat like that I'm not.

Speaker 2 10:23

I'm not trying to chat any type of way. I'm gonna give y'all the as much energy as I can muster up at this given hour, but yeah, so in the beginning what you about to give a genesis no, dang bro what would you say are um? I like your approach here well, hold on before I ask that. How long does it take in you talking to someone or dating someone before you realize that it ain't it for you?

Speaker 3 10:53

it depends on the person. For some people I can tell that it ain't it in the first 30 seconds. Like there have been tender dates, tender dates where. I've been catfished yeah, I'm thinking about a very particular instance where the photo was fire the photos. There were five specific photos. All fire. I pull up with my tinder app open and then shawty come out the crib. I look at the picture. I look at her. Don't look the same. I pulled off very quick as she was walking to the as she was walking to the car.

Speaker 3 11:22

As she was walking to the car. Oh no, I did. Oh no, Absolutely no. This is not who you say you are. I'm leaving.

Speaker 1 11:30

Damn.

Speaker 3 11:30

And then there's others where I make it a point to go somewhere where we have to have a dialogue, like a museum or at dinner or something like that. Usually people go to the movie first and then go to dinner, so they got something to talk about. I go opposite. We don't go eat first, so we have to have dialogue first.

Speaker 3 11:50

Go to the movie theater full, because I'm a cheapskate and then you get maybe a bag of candy, but you're really full from dinner I go reverse engineer with that, because if we can't have a dialogue before the movie, our is going to be superficial because the only thing we're going to be talking about is the movie, not anything else. So in that conversation at dinner, bro, if I'm asking you questions because I do on dates ask 95 questions about you, not me.

Speaker 2 12:23

If you don't have any substance, I'm, I'm cooked and I'm just gonna pay the bill and I'm not gonna engage ever again, so it's one date for me so in in dates, where in the first son a few minutes and talking to a person, what is it that you notice about them that you're like, yeah, that's not gonna work, they don't know themselves.

Speaker 3 12:44

I look for self-awareness. So if I ask you, like what, what do you enjoy doing on a weekend? And you say I just like to chill, you're fucked in my mind. You ain't got nothing. You have no hobbies, no interests. You don't crochet, you don't nothing, you just watch netflix. If that's all you're doing, I'm off that. I'm very quick to all right, she has nothing going on. You don't play sports, you're not reading, you're not exercising. What do you do for yourself? If you don't have anything to offer on that, you're going to be a pain in my ass because I have a lot going on, and if you don't have anything going on for yourself, well, that's a problem for me.

Speaker 2 13:22

Well, what if you have someone that, like they work a lot, so when they do have a weekend, they just want to sit and chill and not do?

Speaker 3 13:26

You better present that. Oh, so lead with, they work Lead with what you do for the bulk of your time, so that on the weekend you like to do nothing. If you just do nothing, then well, I'm doing nothing with you. You have to have something going on.

Speaker 2 13:47

Would you say that is an ick of yours.

Speaker 3 13:50

It is a requirement. You have to be active in some way, whether it's with work, your career, your spirituality or some kind of hobby. If you don't have a single hobby, then that's a problem for me, because while I'm doing all of my many hobbies, what are you doing, worried about what I'm doing or clocking my time that I'm not spending with you because I'm doing something else? That's a problem for me.

Speaker 2 14:24

Sounds like you speak from experience only what would you say are some more dating icks if your toes are busted?

Speaker 3 14:36

that's the first thing that comes to mind. If you don't take care of your feet, my grandmother told me they don't take care of their feet, they don't take care of their lotus flower ball, and that has been proven every single time.

Speaker 2 14:47

Interesting yeah.

Speaker 3 14:49

Feet. I can see if you don't have a manicure, but like your nails are clean, but if you don't take care of them toes, I know you don't take care of that thing, bro, I know you don't.

Business Talk: COO Life

Speaker 2 15:00

No, that's most men. Most dudes seem to notice the feet first. Even if it's not necessarily like a foot fetish thing, it's the toes that they notice.

Speaker 3 15:09

Yeah, that's why she told me look for women in the spring and summer. Only In the winter. We know what y'all do. Y'all don't shave y'all legs. Y'all don't shave y'all armpits. Y'all definitely don't get pedicures. I cares I know it'd be cold, we need another layer. I get it. I ain't looking for y'all then.

Speaker 1 15:34

I'm looking in the summertime, when y'all got them sun dresses on and I'm toes out see what that, what's your hair doing? The?

Speaker 2 15:38

humidity. Let's see, yeah, interesting, okay. Well, any other icks than busted feet?

Speaker 3 15:43

like physical, physical or like mental? If you just don't have any substance to your answers, bro, it's all on. Ask me a question, you and I, on a first date right now. I'll give you an example.

Speaker 2 15:58

What's your relationship like with God?

Speaker 3 16:00

It's the best it has ever been. It's something that I've been looking forward to. You see, there's some substance immediately. If you don't have an answer, say you don't know. Right, don't fake the funk. I can smell it a mile away. It's like a shark on a fine anemo. I go oh bullshit. Excuse me, can I have the check? Let's wrap this date up I'll have a lot of dating um particulars I see what about you?

Speaker 2 16:36

oh you are the hunted true and see, I feel like the stuff that that icks me. It'll be random shit or it'll be stuff that I didn't even know was an ick for me, until I see it, until it presents itself. Yeah, you sound like. Well, I guess the biggest one that I feel like a lot of women go through is when a guy is trying to be too sexual too fast, you're too aggressive too soon. I'm immediately ill. I want to get away from you as fast as possible. Yeah, move, move, big push. Like can't get the hell away from me. And it shows up when, like you know, if all you can talk about is my body, like you only can compliment me on how I look or how fat my butt is, like thank you, but now it's starting to get weird. Or if you seem like you're in a rush to come over to my house. That's another thing. Like on the first meetup, niggas want to come to your house. Oh, we can watch, we can netflix and chill.

Speaker 1 17:32

Let's go, let's chill at your house or you want to come to mine oh, immediately icked out.

Speaker 2 17:37

I can't tell you how many times I've I've ghosted people because that's some shit that they say never met up with them before. But on the first link, they either want to come to my crib or they want me to come to theirs.

Speaker 3 17:47

Uh, blocked, you're blocked at least they're honest, I mean, yeah, I guess, but it's like how, how pissed off would you be if they presented themselves in a way that was misleading and they just wanted to hit?

Speaker 2 18:04

I mean, that's happened too. But because, because I've I've seen enough of that shit, I know how to filter through it. Like I could tell when a guy, for the most part when they just want ass and and the guys that usually just want ass I I let them think they're gonna get it. But like I, I used to use them, like okay, you want this out of me? Well, I'm about to see what I can get up out of you and you're still not going to get it. They just think they are. You, feel me, just got to throw a little breadcrumbs here and there. People like that, you know, get used. At least that's how I used to be.

Speaker 3 18:35

If I'm keeping it above.

Speaker 2 18:37

I'm sorry, but I couldn't Any dude that seemed that thirsty, you that thirsty to, to get in my pants, all right you're giving the fellas some uh, some things to consider yeah, I mean the the best advice, and see, I'm about to give y'all the sauce too.

Speaker 2 18:52

The males of of chat, I'm gonna give y'all the sauce, and I feel like the, the ones who know, know, but the best way to get in them draws is to act like you don't want it, act like you don't want it at first. In fact, if she brings it up, you should sound like you should act like you don't want it, act like you don't want it at first. In fact, if she brings it up, you should sound like you, should act like you're repulsed by it, like what I can't believe. You clutch your pearls, almost feel offended that she even brought it up. I'm super serious, because then that's gonna make us look at it like oh my god, he's different. He's not even like, he's not even biting at the bait. That's a.

Speaker 3 19:21

That's an old play, though, but it's, it's genius, it works, it works I don't think what works better is acknowledging that you're also interested in the physical encounter, but not yet yeah, that too.

Speaker 2 19:34

That's what I'm saying to act like you. Why? Not act like for real for so I mean, I feel like that can go hand in hand. You can talk about how beautiful she is and how attracted you are to her, but the minute she tries to advance like whoa, whoa, wait a minute. What kind of guy do you think I am?

Speaker 1 19:46

like wait a minute, let's, let's move slow.

Speaker 2 19:49

I mean, you don't gotta say it like that, but if you feel, offended by her advance.

Speaker 2 19:53

That's gonna make us take a step back, like, oh my god, am I a whore? Like it's gonna make us look at ourselves like ew, maybe I'm the problem, and then. And then I feel like, if you continue to do so, let's say y'all go on like four or five dates and you keep up that same. You know, but the objective is, you still want the draws. You just what do you call it? The crock pot game. That's what you say, right?

Speaker 3 20:12

yeah, but that's a.

Speaker 2 20:12

That's a long game I feel like I don't know if, if a girl like you enough, you can get four dates in a week, or we can have that's not necessarily how that is way too much how four in a week, do you not work?

Speaker 3 20:27

and do you not have responsibilities?

Speaker 2 20:30

and a date could be. It could be like I don't know something small. It don't even have to be a date. But I'm saying you can see someone at least four or five times in a week. If they feeling you that much, they're gonna find a way to come see you on their lunch break or something they'll find some way to fit in the seat.

Speaker 2 20:43

Small little rendezvous yeah, it don't even have to necessarily be a date, it could be small rendezvous, like I think you know. She might fuck around and come and drop some lunch off to you, to your job, because she like how you know how you talk to her. Real nice, I'm saying, if you keep up this facade, it's gonna get to a point where she's gonna be like yo. So what's up? Are you gay? You don't like me. I've never had somebody buck on me like that I've seen it.

Speaker 3 21:07

I think that would make me laugh.

Speaker 2 21:08

I've seen it and I've done it.

Speaker 3 21:11

What you gay.

Speaker 2 21:11

I've never hit the what you gay, but I'd be like what you scared. I ain't gonna bite you what you think I'm gonna bite you, nigga.

Speaker 3 21:18

Hold on, slow your roll a little bit.

Speaker 2 21:26

You hold on, slow your roll a little bit. You, you want some water and seeing, this is why I say us as women at least I know with me in in situations where I find myself thinking like why hasn't he tried to touch me or anything?

Speaker 3 21:32

I have to check myself like am I damn, I know I'm fine. I'm like am I am I the problem.

Speaker 2 21:36

Am I a slut like what?

Speaker 3 21:39

if he's like yeah, the way you're behaving, I don't think you're a slut. The way you're behaving, though, is slut.

Speaker 2 21:47

It's slut, ish, yeah, then that would. I don't know about every other woman, but that would make me have to reevaluate some shit like god yeah, because then it would make me think like damn, so what have I been like putting up with with any other dude that I've been entertaining?

Speaker 3 22:01

what have I been? Hunch monkeys that's a new that came from the deepest crack of my ass, where the dingleberries are. That that's where hunch monkeys came. That's what you've been dealing, the deepest craze. If he were to respond in that way, you would reflect and be like damn the hunch monkeys again. Yeah, let me go back, because you mentioned the Crock-Pot game. Let me tell y'all what the Crock-Pot game is. It is. If you're familiar with cooking, you put the roast in there with all the accoutrement.

Speaker 1 22:37

Oh.

Speaker 3 22:41

For a long term 8, 10, 12 hours, whatever In the metaphorical sense in the dating world, the crock pot game is. You seeing Shardy at the grocery store and you ask her something small Like hey, which, which would you choose? Cinnamon Toast Crunch or Captain Crunch? All Berries, right? Service level bullshit. She gives you an answer Cinnamon Toast Crunch, thank you, appreciate that, and you leave Right, right, surface level bullshit. She gives you an answer uh, cinnamon toast crunch, thank you, appreciate that, and you leave right, nothing else encounters or continues after that. Then you see her again at the gas station and you say hey, good to see you, how you doing? And she said I'm well, how about you? I'm all right, just about to head to work.

Speaker 1 23:21

Cool, small interaction then you see her again.

Speaker 3 23:25

Now she's getting the book at barnes and noble what you ain't seen, the clip where they said barnes, we outside barnes and nobly. Anyways, she had barnes and noble getting a book. And then you ask her about the book she's reading whatever right, see three times and you keep it going, you keep it going and you never do anything else until you see you're wearing something you like and then you compliment the outfit, but from the waist up earrings, something like that, nose piercing, lip shade, something like that if you can really finesse it, chin and up hair, eyes, eyelashes, if you comment on the brows and the lashes and the eyeliner and the mascara, you going to win big, that's true Because

Speaker 2 24:13

you looking here, you got the eyes with it and we, as women, are going to be like oh my God, you know this, you know this, yeah right, I'm giving y'all too much game.

Speaker 3 24:21

But you stay. What's the word? You stay in the green light Once you see her about an eighth or ninth time. Now you can get to the yellow. You can start talking about the outfit. I really like that outfit, joy. I don't know where you got that top from, but it fits you well, right? Whatever Saying it fits you well says a lot without saying a lot.

Speaker 2 24:43

Mm-hmm, right, whatever saying it fits you well, says a lot without saying a lot. See, and I feel like in that many interactions and you playing the cool like that us, as women, are gonna be like. Why hasn't he asked me for my number? And that's where you want him to be then you see him again.

Speaker 3 24:55

You make him laugh, that's it. That's it. Once you figure out how to make shardy laugh, that is it. If you see her next time and you start singing, the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time. One with a collar turtleneck and she starts singing with you. You got her. Now you can make your moves. You have received some gain. Sweet's over here smiling because she know, that's why.

Speaker 2 25:20

It is. I've had people ask me like yo, so like, how do you speak? I don't speak game. I don't really know how to speak game for real, for you shouldn't have to, no. But I feel like there's some women I know some women who they could talk that shit and they just real, real, smooth, talk anybody about their draws out their wallet, like they. Just some women got game. I'm not one of them.

Speaker 2 25:41

For people who aren't um used to women encounters, yes maybe that's true, but I've seen some man eaters out there and I watch them work like that's pretty neat yeah, but like, if you're all right, well fuck it.

Speaker 3 25:57

If you're a woman that's out here spaying game for the, for the men that you're looking for, you're not gonna find them game for the, for the men that you're looking for, you're not gonna find them. Why is that? We ain't looking for the one who's looking for us? We're looking for the woman that's minding her business, knowing that she looks good and that somebody's gonna eventually come talk to her. That's the one that we want if you out here hunting. We don't want you. We do not want you.

Speaker 2 26:23

Does it come off as too thirsty?

Speaker 3 26:25

No, we just don't want you. That's it. I don't want any woman that approaches me first. Not a single one.

Speaker 2 26:33

Is it because you think that she approaches a lot of men, or she just probably doesn't want?

Speaker 3 26:37

to Well, what would you?

Speaker 2 26:38

think Probably.

Speaker 3 26:40

Exactly, you run this game on everybody.

Speaker 2 26:43

I've said that to men who came up to me and said some real smooth shit.

Speaker 3 26:46

I'm like ah, when you come up to somebody fellas with a punch line you are losing every time.

Speaker 2 26:53

This is true.

Dating Icks: Red Flags & Turn-offs

Speaker 3 26:54

This ain't Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, bro. That doesn't work. This is true. If it's not on some real simple, cool, casual, conversational type, you're going to be sought out and sniped real quick. Because why are you doing that? Don't? Nobody want to be spit game at while they, in line with their wit, check. That's just a bad time. She buying Similac and you out here trying to bag Shawnee. No, that is not the time.

Speaker 2 27:20

Or you could just offer to buy the Formula 4. That would get her attention.

Speaker 3 27:24

That's a better way, but now you're tricking.

Speaker 2 27:26

Is it?

Speaker 3 27:27

It is, you don't know, shardy, from A Can of Pain. Yo, I'll get that for you. You see a similar. You're trying to be stepdaddy now. That's what you're saying. By doing it, you're tricking. No, no, no, no. Offer money, you offer coffee, you offer a date. That's like in a public place, something like that. You seem a little stressed. Do you want to just go meet up for coffee and discuss some stuff? I'll just, I'll just be here, listening here. That kind of presentation might work a little bit, depending on who she is, how many times you encounter her. But if you coming up with damn sorry, I wish I could plant a whole field of y'all Like come on, come on. Hey, excuse me, you look like you carry a lot back there. You need some help carrying that.

Speaker 1 28:13

Come on bro.

Speaker 3 28:14

Or the infamous. Here it is.

Speaker 2 28:17

Here. Oh no, I'm definitely going to keep walking, Sade, I'm not even going to turn my head.

Speaker 3 28:23

Damn Ma, where you at, when you going? You came here by yourself.

Speaker 2 28:28

You ain't got no man, we're probably going to lie. Actually, yes, I do. He's crazy, he shoots.

Speaker 3 28:33

I'm telling you, I'm giving you the don'ts right now.

Speaker 2 28:37

He shoots. Oh no, old school. Oh not the whistle.

Speaker 3 28:40

I'm going to say not that I know people still do that though.

Speaker 2 28:43

Wow, not the whistle.

Speaker 3 28:45

I'm telling you, it's things that I've seen, or at the bar, if you are here's another thing you meet Shardy out Friday night.

Speaker 2 28:57

That's not the one you want, because she always out Friday night. Is that why?

Speaker 3 29:02

Could be, but that's not the place. If you see her out friday night and she catches your attention, wait don't holler at her. There she's been hollered at all night wait that's my advice. That's my unsolicited advice wait till you see shardy somewhere else that's at the bank. That's a better place that's true you cashing in the check, you depositing in the check, you checking on some funds. You're at a bank. Do it there. Don't do it at the gym where she got her air pods in oh god, yeah, that's.

Speaker 2 29:29

You see the contrast.

Speaker 3 29:30

That's creepy a little bit too why, why are you signaling to shardy to take out her air pod? See most fucking up the rotation most girls at the gym.

Speaker 2 29:37

When a guy try to holler even if you're cool and on some chill shit nine times out of ten we're already thinking you're a creep great. I will say, though, at the at the club, anytime on the weekend, when you holler, if you run into a girl like myself, I'm not gonna give you my real name, I'm gonna lie, I'm gonna give you my alias if I see you again outside. You're like oh, keisha. I'm like oh shit, you remember me.

Speaker 3 30:00

That's another thing, fellas, if you're good at names if you're good at names. You will win every time if you remember her name if you, if you are really like on some joe from you type shit, you'll overhear her name and then say her name. That's game I've used if you catch shawty at work. Just glimpse the name tag, remember. It don't say nothing till you.

Speaker 2 30:25

See her somewhere else where she's not wearing the name tag yo that's funny, you say that I had somebody when I worked at the mall I had somebody right, yeah, yeah I had somebody riz me up, right they. It was when I was working at lady full locker at the time and I guess the this gentleman specifically he saw he peeped my lanyard and he saw my name tag and he sent flowers to my job for me.

Speaker 2 30:51

Oh, that's game right there, brother, and when I got there, everybody's like oh so you gotta see my hair. So I had to go and see him and he said I know you don't know me, but I saw you in line at the food court and I just had to I don't know.

Speaker 3 31:04

I forgot what he said and he left his number.

Speaker 2 31:06

Then he left his number and his name, so of course I go of course I called the number. It sounds like. Excuse me, but how?

Speaker 3 31:12

do you know where you want to say thank?

Speaker 2 31:13

you. I did want to say thank you, but then it was also like, how do you know where? And then, when he explained it, while I saw your lanyard, I was like, well, that is sweet.

Speaker 3 31:20

That's research. Yeah, that is what we call watching film.

Speaker 2 31:23

That is riz. I was like that's pretty neat.

Speaker 3 31:26

Did you date him? No, oh.

Speaker 2 31:30

I was taken at the time but I was like you know what's crazy. I thought the flowers were. They came from my boyfriend.

Speaker 1 31:34

I was like oh, my boyfriend sent me some flowers and it wasn't him, he had to.

Speaker 3 31:39

Did you consider him once you broke up?

Speaker 1 31:42

No.

Speaker 3 31:43

Then what?

Speaker 2 31:43

happened no.

Speaker 3 31:48

So, although he rids me up like that, he was too thirsty, too desperate. Oh, he kept it up. He kept it up. Yeah, he was like coming by my job.

Speaker 2 31:51

He was pressing too hard.

Speaker 3 31:53

My only suggestion for that guy was to leave that there. No, he was Stop there because she's taken, did you tell?

Speaker 1 31:58

him that.

Speaker 2 31:59

I did. Okay, did you tell him?

Speaker 3 31:59

that I did, Okay. So yeah, you leave that there and you know what's crazy?

Speaker 2 32:03

Even though I told him I was taking, he didn't give a damn. He didn't give a damn. Oh yeah, he was on some like. I'm like yo, you trying to get me in trouble for real.

Speaker 3 32:13

You need to chill. You know how you got me thinking. It depends on what your motive is.

Speaker 1 32:17

What it depends on what your. If his motive was just to, be your boyfriend number two then?

Speaker 3 32:22

well, his game was fine.

Speaker 2 32:24

He was okay with that that was it. He wanted access to me by any means. He said that he just wanted access to me If he was trying to wife you.

Speaker 3 32:32

Then he went all about it. He went that wrong.

Speaker 2 32:35

He started out hot, he did, he blew it, but still just the way he went about it. Like I said, it was giving like a little bit of a stalker I need you to okay well I am but you won't know well, no, he was on like I said, he was on some like where your boyfriend work at. I go to his job right now. I'm like whoa, oh, I feel, like I feel like you have to stop loki I mean yeah I got you got to do your research and stuff.

Speaker 2 33:00

But again, he was just a little too aggressive about it and if you want to stalk me, I should know that.

Speaker 3 33:05

I know how that shit might come off, but like you do have to stop as a as a as a man, right, if I'm trying to bag, if I'm trying to bag you, I'm gonna figure out what your quirks are. By what do we use the most your social media? I'm gonna figure out what your name is, figure out who you run with and then one day guess what you pop up in my suggested friends. Well now, I'm gonna not follow right away. I'm gonna look, I'm gonna do my research. What are your captions? What music do you like? You know what I mean. Get all the info. Where do you like to go? Where do you? Oh, uh, send me back those posts where did you?

The Crock-Pot Game Revealed

Speaker 3 33:44

where have you traveled that you want to visit again? Take me back. That's what it is. Let me figure out, like what you post about, and then when we discuss things, I'm trying to figure out what you don't post about that part. Where do you work? Who are your friends? What music do you like? Like? That's me. Music is my number one. You know that about me. What do you play? So if I get the opportunity to take you on a date, I'm playing what you like. You do the research for the opportunity whenever it presents itself Interesting.

Speaker 3 34:17

If you quote in SZA, guess what I'm going to have on the playlist. If you quote in Jill Scott, if you quote in Erykah Badu, boom, boom, boom whole playlist is going to be crazy as soon as you get in the car. It's going to be all the songs that I've seen you post on your story, that you singing along to that.

Speaker 1 34:46

You know the words to yeah, it's going to be car karaoke.

Speaker 3 34:47

And guess what? If I don't know the song, watch me learn. You're going to think that that's my song too. No, no, no, no, don't be, don't be fooled. This is game now. See, now I'm giving too much, but it's cool, I'm taking so I guess the game don't really matter. Fellas, you're welcome. Do your research, bro, figure out what it is she likes and then do that find interest in it if she like pokemon cards, bro you better educate yourself on pokemon card, because that's your only way in.

Speaker 3 35:05

That's your only way in, bro. If you're not into it and she is, well guess what? She's gonna be spending a lot of time doing that pokemon shit and you're gonna have to deal with it.

Speaker 1 35:12

So you better figure out what it is what it means.

Speaker 3 35:14

You better know what a fucking charizard is, or pikachu or or whatever charmander who cares? Figure out what they are, just so you can generally know. Like, for example, I have never watched Lion King in its entirety, but boy do I know the plot. I spark noted the fuck out of that movie. Wow, why do I need to know that? I don't? Wow. But if somebody who I'm interested in likes Lion King. Well, I may have to know who the hell Mufasa is. Maybe Wow, who knows?

Speaker 2 35:47

What are you wowing about? It's just it's a little manipulative, Not a little, that's manipulative.

Speaker 3 35:51

Well, here we go. This is perfect. It is manipulative. Do you know?

Speaker 2 35:58

what manipulate means. I do.

Speaker 3 35:59

Handle or control Typically in a skillful manner, hmm.

Speaker 1 36:07

Hmm.

Speaker 3 36:08

Yes, it's manipulation.

Speaker 1 36:10

Okay, sure.

Speaker 3 36:11

Just like telling your kids to do stuff in a certain way because you told them to, or whatever. That is also manipulation.

Speaker 1 36:18

You use, it Use it for good.

Speaker 2 36:22

All right. So question on the opposite side, on the other side of the coin, and when you first start dating someone, what is it about them that would make you be like, oh my gosh, I have to see them again. Or like I need them, that energy around me more, like what is it that would make you start feeling like that about someone?

Speaker 3 36:40

when you teach me something, what did?

Speaker 1 36:42

I learn from the encounter something.

Speaker 3 36:44

What did I learn from the encounter we had? What did I learn from our conversation, either about you, about myself or about the world, did you put?

Speaker 1 36:53

me on to something.

Speaker 3 36:55

Was it a new song, a new movie, a new book, a new hobby? Did you teach me something?

Speaker 1 37:01

If you taught me something.

Speaker 3 37:02

I'm coming back Because I'm a dweeb, I like to learn. So if you ain't teaching me nothing, well, that's going to be the end of that First date. Cool, had the experience, didn't learn shit. Not coming back If you putting me on the stuff and I'm like, oh, I didn't know that. If you hear me say, oh, I didn't know that, I didn't know that. If you hear me say, oh, I didn't know that, okay word, appreciate that. If I'm saying, thank you for some info, yeah, you might have a shot.

Speaker 3 37:35

But if I'm learning zilch goose egg donut sorry, thanks for your time, but it won't be needed anymore.

Speaker 2 37:40

Would you say that's like the only thing or that's just the biggest thing?

Speaker 3 37:50

It's the largest thing, that's the or. That's just the biggest thing. It's the largest thing. Teach me something be spiritual in some kind of way. I don't care if you believe in whatever, just believe in something and then have some hobbies. That's like my big ticket items and then if you look good boys at the cherry and the whipped cream. Yeah. Because I got some ducks in my collection like Futures, is it ain't?

Speaker 3 38:08

about what you look like. It's about how I feel when I'm with you. If I don't feel like I'm him when I leave you, well, you might just be a fling, you bad, but you ain't got nothing between them ears. That's cool. Teach me something, bro, be my, be my. Let me learn you something today, youngie yeah, I can agree with that.

Speaker 2 38:33

I feel like that'd be a big one for me too. I feel like also for me is uh, is a sense of humor, like I love to laugh that's a sleeper. I didn't mention I laugh at a lot of shit. Don't get me wrong, and I have a tendency to make my own self laugh. Even if I'm chilling with someone and they're boring, I'm gonna have my own self entertained. But the minute I see that you are just as stowed as I am, are you got the same you got?

Speaker 2 38:58

the same flavor that I got. Oh, that's gonna sell me right there too.

Speaker 3 39:04

I'm like oh, my god, he's stupid, just like me, I love it that's a sleeper yeah, that's for the fellas, that's a sleeper, because we're usually the ones that have to be the funny ones oh usually, if you think about it on the grand scheme of things, guys have to be entertaining in some way that is so boring.

Speaker 2 39:20

See, I feel like myself and anybody that consider A girlfriend of mine. They're goofy, just like me, like I can't be around, no Born.

Speaker 3 39:28

Blamp Born ass Beach, my bad. That's the Old shaft Coming out.

Speaker 2 39:35

He's a bad mother, shut your mouth. I'm just talking about shaft, but Nah, I just feel like Anybody that's cool with me, gotta be funny too.

Speaker 3 39:43

That's the golden ticket. Well, that is the willie wonka golden ticket right there what sense of humor yo that's huge right.

Speaker 2 39:49

That's the one. I can't believe I didn't mention that yeah, I haven't been with somebody who makes me laugh for real there's a there's a certain type of intimacy and laughing so hard that you that you can't breathe, or laughing so hard that you that you're crying with someone that's a full circle moment that's unmatched.

Speaker 3 40:05

That might be number one.

Speaker 2 40:06

That's unmatched.

Speaker 3 40:08

That might be number one. This is a real time revelation.

Speaker 2 40:11

I feel like that's a big thing for me, because there's so much in this world to piss you off and make you sad and I say all the time you got to laugh to keep from crying.

Speaker 3 40:27

You know I'm sorry, stop being so serious all the time. Yeah, I think that's my biggest gripe about just the opposite gender, because, all right, women come to a date with the expectation to be entertained. It makes me think about Remember the Time. Don't tell the lions. You want to be entertained.

Speaker 2 40:41

What if I want to laugh?

Speaker 3 40:44

And it's not me making myself laugh. I could crack myself up, but what if you're the one that makes me laugh and I go damn, she's funny. That's like a real crazy experience when you have been the one that's been responsible for making the humor happen when I'm with somebody and they make me laugh. I'm having a great time. It takes the pressure off of me to like crack jokes.

Speaker 2 41:07

When you cracking jokes, even if it's about me, I like that you know what I've noticed and the men that I've entertained or dated, they're like wow, you're really funny, like they, they, they give me credit for being funny and they're saying they're not used to it. Women are usually boring like you said boring, I think.

Speaker 2 41:23

For me it's almost like a, it's like a defense mechanism that I can't help it like when I, if I get nervous or sometimes, or if it's just like quiet to fill the space, it's like my I don't know what it is. Some shit will start twinkling out of me and I'll just say whatever's on my brain, and it's usually something outlandish and they're like hey, yo like you're different that's um you're.

Speaker 3 41:44

I think you're right with the defense mechanism yeah the funniest people have been through the worst bullshit or have been like verbally berated by people their entire life and like they're the main one the eight mile thing where you get all your stuff out about yourself.

Speaker 2 41:57

So that way no one has anything exactly, you jump in front of it. So now you can't use it again.

Speaker 3 42:00

That's it. The funniest people that I know do that that's that you were absolutely cooking. I don't know if that's like backed by science at all, but I know from experience the funniest people are the ones that have even they might have the deepest insecurities, but also have been shit on like that's true a lot that's true. A lot, that's true, and usually when you meet somebody, y'all that's super funny. Oh no, they got some scars.

Speaker 2 42:28

Oh, my God, yes.

Speaker 3 42:30

That's where the pain.

Speaker 2 42:30

I think that's why I like funny people. I can recognize that in funny people Like ah, you're fucked up too.

Speaker 1 42:37

Yeah.

Speaker 2 42:37

But this is why I enjoy you. Those are my people.

Speaker 3 42:40

That's another real-time realization. I think that's what draws me to people that are funny. I want to go deep into research about why you're so funny. Where did that pain come from? Because for you to just joke about suicide like that you've had to have experienced loss in that regard, and it had to be someone that's close to where. Now, when you talk about it, you make light of it it's not as bad as it sounds, true, I don't know, maybe I'm true.

Speaker 2 43:11

No, no, no. Am I spitting or am I true? No, you spitting? Or like the people who make fun of themselves, like you said, like when they're hard on themselves. It's like damn people used to. Really You've been through the blender.

Speaker 3 43:22

bro, You're going to be funny.

Speaker 2 43:23

Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 3 43:24

And it might be some stuff that people have said about you that you might say about yourself to other people. Now it's in your satchel.

Speaker 2 43:31

That's crazy too, when I tell people, yeah, yeah, I know my head is big or whatever, and you're like you don't got a big head. I'm like that's a lie. I been made fun of for that my whole life. So when people say something like what are you talking about? Where they don't see it, it's almost like well, shit well, am I am I? Am I tripping? Like am I I?

Speaker 2 43:52

don't know, but I see what you're saying yeah, or like when I, when I try to jump in front of the jokes that I've heard so many times about myself, and then there's the one person that's like I don't, I don't see what you mean, I don't what you're talking about. It takes the wind out of my sails a little bit. I'm like, well damn, maybe I'm a little too hard on myself.

Speaker 3 44:07

Maybe that's my trauma. What if that's true?

Speaker 2 44:09

My past trauma.

Speaker 3 44:10

What if that's true? Because if you got a big head and you with the right person, your head ain't big to them, it's a head. Live in the socket where your nostrils are, where your brain sits, it's your head, but to somebody who just don't really fit well, you're gonna be everything under something. That's all I'm saying it could be both yes and yeah, that's not it damn.

Speaker 3 44:38

We cooked for for just dating. We didn't even get to where we at 44 minutes. What you feeling? This is season two. I don't know if they can handle more, but what you think.

Speaker 2 44:50

I mean, they could probably handle a little bit more and all.

Speaker 3 44:53

It depends on where we go.

Speaker 2 44:55

Well, I don't know Anything you'd like to ask about dating.

Speaker 1 44:59

The wonderful Wizard of Oz.

Speaker 2 45:04

Where are we going Do?

Speaker 3 45:05

you have anything to add on dating or any questions. I got plenty to add on dating. This will be a three hour pod.

Speaker 2 45:08

Well then, throw something in there. Who should pay?

Speaker 3 45:11

Who should pay on the first date?

Who Pays on First Dates?

Speaker 2 45:13

I feel like.

Speaker 3 45:14

Gotcha, we ain't done yet.

Speaker 2 45:17

I feel like if a guy is asking me out on a date and let's say we do the traditional dinner and a movie thing, if we're doing the dinner first or something, I feel like it'd be fair if you paid and I'll get the movie. That's cool.

Speaker 3 45:33

Really, yeah, hmm, well, that's cool.

Speaker 2 45:36

First time I've heard it, but I feel like I also feel like that's just the kind of person I am. If you're going to take me on a date and let's just say you know that's the activities planned for the night, I would probably offer Like, hey, you know, you want me to get the movie sent you, or you want me to get the snacks, or something Like I would just to put my little bit in Now in me doing that. Me being a woman of, I'm gonna hope that you say, no, that's cool, I got it, it's cool baby. We always hope that when we offer I don't know a woman and any woman who says that she really needs that shit for real, like and in hopes that they, that they be like, no, no, it's okay and what about your equal?

Speaker 2 46:16

uh, equal rights women, man, look every woman. I'm not being a pick me, this is some real shit. Every woman wants you to pay it. Even when we offer, we're hoping that you say no baby we're independent.

Speaker 1 46:29

No, I don't know, man but?

Speaker 2 46:31

but let me tell you this even the hyper independent ones that that offer to pay, let's say you, let them pay. They are going to talk shit about you later. Oh, you are going in the group chat bitch. Did you know that? This nigga? Actually let me this nigga actually let me pay and all her friends go by. What? No, he didn't you want out with him again you might not get another date out of her that's funny that's just me keeping it all the way on, done I?

Speaker 3 46:54

feel like I can't even try that. I want to try.

Speaker 2 46:57

I've never let anybody pay now it's different, though, like when y'all, if y'all been dating and y'all been doing it for a little while, then I feel like, yeah, it's fair to like, you know, split it or you know you pay for this. I'll pay for that, that's fair but I feel like in the in the beginning, if the man is the hunter and we are supposed to be the hunted, you're trying to pursue me oh, what about shawty that was bagging people oh, the man eaters that I know what you mean.

Speaker 3 47:18

That's what you call them.

Speaker 2 47:19

I call them man-eaters.

Speaker 3 47:20

So should the man-eater pay.

Speaker 2 47:22

I haven't seen it.

Speaker 3 47:25

The man-eaters? I know they don't. How do you call a hunk and then not?

Speaker 2 47:26

pay on the date I don't know because I don't know what it is that they be saying to you.

Speaker 3 47:29

What sense does that make Man-eaters? This is why I call who's the hunter?

Speaker 2 47:38

I think it's more so. Just a, you know how guys like the feeling of conquering. Y'all like to conquer shit, like you know women, where did you? Get that you? I've heard you say that and I've heard other men say that like you know, you hear me say I like to conquer women what? Well then you say that men like to conquer we like to compete, okay. Well, do men not like to conquer things? Am I, am I making that up? I can't generalize. I men not like to?

Speaker 3 48:01

conquer things. Am I making that up? I can't generalize. I don't like to conquer things, I like to compete. I'm a competitor.

Speaker 2 48:07

Okay, well.

Speaker 3 48:09

I like to whoop that ass.

Speaker 2 48:13

Well, I've heard numerous men say that they like the. It's like some alpha male shit.

Speaker 3 48:19

You mean men that like to chase.

Speaker 2 48:22

Well, yeah, that's different than conquering.

Speaker 3 48:23

That's a whole different category.

Speaker 2 48:24

Okay, well, they like to chase, and then they like to win the sport or whatever they like to win their prize You're saying different things. I'm saying is conquering shit not the same as you winning and beating that ass? Is that not the same?

Speaker 3 48:38

It depends. That sounds kind of like similar to me it's similar but different in the conquering is like you conquered the fucking castle. If it's some game of thrones type shit like, but that means you won you killed everybody, you, you caused damage if you conquered it, you won or caused damage, that's.

Speaker 2 48:58

That's the difference let's you know, let's just look at it. You're way late on that.

Speaker 3 49:03

You're way late there's a very very clear difference between conquer and compete. How about you look at?

Speaker 2 49:08

what I'm saying, if you're, if you're competing to win right, that's what you're competing for is conquering, not winning. Is that not the same?

Speaker 3 49:15

look at the difference. I'm competing against men. You conquer women. You see the difference, your audience is different. I'm not competing with you.

Speaker 2 49:28

I'm competing with other men that want you you're competing with other men that want to get me and, and so you would hope to win me over the other men, right? And look at conquer conquer, overcome and take control of yeah, you see how that sounds crazy successfully overcome uh-huh oh, it says by use of military force yeah, you see the difference.

Speaker 3 49:54

Thank you, did you pull up compete? Yeah, I'm glad that this happened, because conquer is crazy. That is some 50 shades of gray. I'm about to put you in handcuffs and conquer you.

Speaker 2 50:06

Oh, that's what that is by force to take control strive to gain or win something by defeating or establishing superiority over others who are trying to do the same exactly.

Speaker 3 50:19

You see, don't, don't, don't bark at that tree, bro. I'm telling you, I fried that difference. Trying to do the same. Exactly. You see, don't, don't, don't bark at that tree, bro, I'm telling you, I fried that difference.

Speaker 2 50:27

Oh Okay.

Speaker 3 50:29

Mm-hmm Please.

Speaker 2 50:30

Please. Alright, if we're Playing the game of semantics, we'll say you won that one, but no, no, no, that's not the point I.

Speaker 3 50:38

English is stupid. There's lots of words that mean similar things, if used improperly.

Speaker 2 50:45

Essentially my point in saying that is men like to be the victor, you like to be the winner, you like to be the one that got the prize Right, of course, just don't use con. There are women who have that mentality also, these man eaters that I speak of. They like the feeling of it's like a power thing.

Speaker 3 51:06

It makes them feel powerful. What's their objective? Is it to crap on other women no or is it to win the man?

Speaker 2 51:16

It's to win the man and to get him to do pretty much whatever he wants.

Speaker 1 51:21

Yeah that's sick.

Speaker 2 51:21

That's how they feel, like they won. When they see they can get a man to jump whenever they say jump and how high, then they're like got him.

Speaker 3 51:30

Next. That's the goal there. Next In my mind.

Speaker 2 51:33

And sometimes it's not even just about the money, it's just they just want to see if they can do it, just to see if they can. And once they see that they can, next victim on to the next one.

Speaker 3 51:41

Maybe I'm not speaking Chat. You're going to have to let us know Because, like for me, it's about the men. I'm competing with the men. I know that when I'm with somebody that other men want, that's like a real ego stroke.

Speaker 1 51:58

I know you want her, I want her.

Speaker 3 52:01

But, guess what she's on my arm? It's more for them than it is to make you jump as high, as I want you to.

Speaker 2 52:09

That is crazy. Well, I guess maybe that's the difference. That's a huge difference. So, yeah, y'all do it. To compete with other men. We, I guess we would do it to just is to feel powerful, I guess, to feel like, you know, we have power over the man. That's disgusting.

Speaker 3 52:24

That is nasty work, and then we're toxic.

Speaker 2 52:27

Fuck out of here hey, I I don't disagree that women are toxic yeah, I'm just saying, that is like bitches are toxic, they so can be crazy I, I don't I've had my toxic face that makes me sick to think that you would try some shit like that. Not you, but like whoever you are, that's, but there's men like that, though there are. There's men that do that same.

Speaker 3 52:49

There are but those are the anomaly, those are the uh yeah, the anomaly, as in the ones that beat women there's not a lot of us that do that there's enough, though the good men that I'm talking about, that you know open doors, chivalry still alive. You know pay the bills, work hard, provide a protector on it I mean for them, men that. Do it just because that's their duty and responsibility yeah, that ain't, that ain't us. You know what? Maybe we're the anomaly because they're.

Dating Is Ghetto: Final Thoughts

Speaker 2 53:19

That's better, because I'm gonna say there might be a lot of y'all, but I feel like I don't associate with them. That's why I say that's to me in my circle the anomaly is the god is doing that shit well, to me speaking, I can't speak for all women, but I feel like I can speak for a lot of the masses. Y'all are the anomaly. How many times have you opened the door for a, for a girl? She's like, oh, thank you, and she's almost a little bit surprised.

Speaker 2 53:43

Whenever they get surprised, I'm saying, when you come around and open open the car door, how many women had, do you know, be like oh my gosh, you opened my car door for like it's. It's surprising because a lot of niggas out here not doing that, they're not doing that shit. So, guys that are doing it, y'all are the anomaly well then, then I misspoke.

Speaker 3 54:02

Y'all are just not. I don't even have words for those guys.

Speaker 2 54:09

But I will also say these women make it easy for dudes to do that. We allow that shit.

Speaker 3 54:16

All right, yep Thanks. Steve Harvey said this.

Speaker 2 54:20

I will say women are to blame, why men give bare minimum bullshit and we take that shit. So when we find a guy, that is the anomaly.

Speaker 3 54:27

Shout out to Mom Dukes. I just said this to her. I just said this to her on the phone. It might have been today. Women only tolerate what they accept.

Speaker 2 54:37

Mm-hmm. Absolutely.

Speaker 3 54:40

There's this chapter. I forget what the chapter is like, the name specifically, but it's in steve harvey's act like a lady, think like a man, where he's talking about the power that women have. If they only realize what power they have, it would be a whole different world. Like fellas, I get that some of you will disagree with this, but the reason why you shower is not for yourself.

Speaker 3 55:05

The reason why you wear cologne is not for yourself. It is so that another woman might smell it and say you smell nice. That is what we do it for. You don't work hard to make a bunch of money for yourself.

Speaker 2 55:21

You do it so that you can support whoever it is that you you get as a woman, so should I keep that in mind when you leave the house with cologne on yeah sure, you don't put on cologne for yourself.

Speaker 3 55:34

You put on cologne for the lady that you're with or the lady that you want. That's just period, what it is. That's a fact. You wouldn't brush your teeth, you wouldn't shave, you wouldn't get diced up at the at the barbershop if it wasn't for the women that you want to get or look good for period. We would be on some caveman shit if there were no women so y'all wouldn't try to make the argument like.

Speaker 2 55:57

I do it for myself. It makes me feel better about myself if they are their cabin.

Speaker 3 56:01

No, we don't do it for that. Every felt, every real self-aware man knows. If there were no one, we would be chilling, we would be scruffy, chilling at the crib, watching sports, drinking beers, eating bullshit that's just what we would do.

Speaker 2 56:23

I mean, I feel like women would be the same, like if men weren't around. You think girls would be out here with lashes and lace warts and all that shit.

Speaker 3 56:29

Yeah, I think they would, because y'all are the most judgmental group of people I've ever seen in my life. Yeah, you shawty gonna dog you as soon as you go outside and you look like the damn werewolf in the summertime. Go outside with your hairy ass, winter legs in the summertime. Watch, watch how them chicks dog you. You, you women do this for other women more than you do it for men, because you don't want to get talked about, you don't want to get bullied, you don't want to get, you don't want to be the one that the chatty girls are talking about. That's what I'd say. That's what I've observed interesting.

Speaker 3 57:04

It's an interesting take I see all the time I don't completely disagree, even the moment somebody says something about somebody's oh you look good today, oh my makeup. They just uh right when there's a girl around. But if a guy is just a guy and a girl and they compliment you and make you oh, thank you, yeah, nah, I peep, yeah, nah, we going to let that ride, because chat going to talk about that for sure.

Speaker 2 57:30

Interesting. Wow, that is pretty interesting.

Speaker 3 57:35

We've been cooking on the date and stuff, we'll see, we'll let chat, because I'm Mr Controversial, mr controversial, always. I just watch stuff and be like you know, I haven't said shit about this in a while and then I just there's somebody on on this shoulder that's like don't, please, don't, don't say that and I'm like that's what I'm saying, because there's something, there's somebody that's gonna feel that you're gonna be in the car, like I thought the same thing.

Speaker 3 58:03

Nah, you ain't by yourself. I'm gonna be the first one to tell you you are not tripping. Have you seen it with your own eyes? I've seen the same thing and you just scared to say, well, I'm not, shit's terrible. What's the what's the what's the phrase? Long story, less long.

Speaker 2 58:23

All in all at the end of the day trash. Yeah, it is absolute dog shit it's ghetto out here dating, so if you got somebody keep them. What like jenna say, yeah, hold on to them, it's cheaper to keep them from personal experience.

Speaker 3 58:42

But don't if it's, if it's really causing you like some mental distress. Bro, cut that cord. Bro, cut the umbilical cord. Bro, bye, see ya, bye. Felicia spartan. Kick him. This is spartan. Kick him right in the hole um, but yeah, dating is absolutely really um it's terrible it's just as bad as being a ceo there.

Speaker 2 59:06

There's my comparison for the day well shit, at least with a ceo you get like money and stuff at some point like it could be lucrative dating is just if you just keep dating you're getting pussy hopefully well, there's the silver lining.

Speaker 3 59:19

There is no silver lining to dating for real, unless you actually like get the person that you want, and it's like not some waste of time, which is not a waste of time, it's a learning opportunity I get that.

Speaker 3 59:30

However, for the most part, if you ain't get no kid out of it, that's like a blessing to you. Usually you like I could have been doing something else with that. It can be a waste of time and a lesson. I think it can be both. That's my unpopular opinion. Yeah, anyways, I'm going to let you take us over. This is bullshit.

Speaker 2 59:55

Dating is bullshit. I'm glad I ain't dating.

Speaker 3 59:57

But if I was, that's bullshit.

Speaker 2 59:59

No, dating is ghetto.

Speaker 3 1:00:02

That's why I'm a serial relationship guy.

Speaker 2 1:00:04

Yeah, I'm not about that single life. That shit is terrible.

Speaker 3 1:00:07

I used to lie to myself and say I was and then be like man. This shit is terrible. I don't like being at the club, I don't like being in them.

Speaker 2 1:00:17

I don't. I don't like having to get to know people all over again. What's your favorite color?

Speaker 3 1:00:24

I'm sick of that dumbass, unless it's some fire, like where they hit you with the yo top five cereals go.

Speaker 1 1:00:29

If you want that, then we cool if you ask me what my favorite color, is and like whatever bullshit.

Speaker 3 1:00:36

So what do you do for work?

Speaker 2 1:00:37

you shut up do you like it? You like it, yeah, you actually love your job.

Speaker 3 1:00:43

I've never heard that before. That's awesome. What do you teach? What do you teach?

Speaker 2 1:00:48

Oh you're gay. Do you want more kids? I don't like her.

Speaker 1 1:00:51

Do you have any?

Speaker 3 1:00:52

kids. Which one do you like? Do you like Dutch Rose or Starbucks?

Speaker 2 1:00:57

Oh my.

Speaker 3 1:00:58

God, I don't know, that is my.

Speaker 2 1:00:59

She's making my head hurt. I was thinking about it.

Speaker 3 1:01:02

Oh, I didn't know that. How many siblings do you have? What's your family like? Do you think like eventually we'll get there and we can?

Speaker 1 1:01:12

Do you want to get?

Speaker 2 1:01:13

married someday. What do you think?

Speaker 3 1:01:14

about marriage, the idea of marriage. I think it's bullshit, right, don't you?

Speaker 1 1:01:24

The whole marriage license thing. You know weddings and or, oh, you like that. Oh, oh yeah, marriage isn't that bad do you hear the cat?

Speaker 3 1:01:27

yeah, isn't it draining? Look at you.

Speaker 2 1:01:28

You look stressed yeah, the whole shit, man, I told you it's making my hair hurt, so um.

Speaker 3 1:01:34

So that joint is crazy.

Speaker 1 1:01:37

You look yeah you know what you was doing when you put that shit on bro that's crazy bruh, I can't even believe I'm on a date with you for real.

Speaker 3 1:01:47

God you trying to watch a movie or something after this.

Speaker 2 1:01:49

See, and then Immediately no, immediately no. If y'all could've saw her eye roll, bruh, that shit pisses me off, and you know it's crazy, the niggas that I've ghosted when I've accidentally All your friends look like you too. When I've accidentally ran into them or something like yo what happened? Let's end it with the worst punchlines. The worst punchlines the worst punchlines you ever heard. Oh man.

Speaker 3 1:02:16

The things that make you get real angry or make your lip do that. I'm trying to think real angry or make you do that.

Speaker 2 1:02:20

I'm trying to think.

Speaker 3 1:02:21

I know you heard some bullshit.

Speaker 2 1:02:24

I had somebody ask me how much my procedure cost.

Speaker 3 1:02:29

How much you pay for that BBL?

Speaker 2 1:02:33

Yeah, man Dog, that shit made me so mad.

Speaker 3 1:02:38

Hey, bruh, excuse me. Excuse me, is that yours? That's real Word.

Speaker 2 1:02:45

It was something similar to that. I said Nah, for real, that's all yours. I think my response to him was so when you. So you felt like that was appropriate when you played that out in your mind, like how did you think that was going to go? Like how was I supposed to?

Speaker 3 1:03:00

No know, what did you say all the time we were talking? You said something along the lines of like, so you thought that that was appropriate yeah, so that that sounded good to you that, that sounded good to you in your head that's the same.

Speaker 3 1:03:11

Uh stamp right there. So yeah, so that just seemed appropriate to say that you say that to other women I don't even know how to respond to you, but like you, thought that that was cool yeah and that's, and I hit dudes with that and they're so taken aback by like oh it's kind of like I'm hanging out with you or something yeah, it's like you know me or something so that's wow.

Speaker 2 1:03:30

Oh, that's interesting when dudes have said that was a problem when dudes have said outlandish shit to me and then I addressed them like that they feel like they're getting scolded by like a teacher or something oh my, I need me no, I mean no disrespect, it's fine did, they do this too yeah, immediately put their hands up. No, I mean no disrespect. Well, what did you mean by it?

Speaker 3 1:03:49

how was that supposed to?

Speaker 2 1:03:50

bitch, yeah, oh no, see, no, no, you know earlier, hold on, hold on, hold on. You know earlier when you say, when they be like you're yo, you, what's up? And then they call out what you have on, like yo, shorty with the white shoes, if you keep moving then it's fuck you, bitch, you ugly. Anyway I'm like ah, now I'm ugly, now I'm a bitch because I kept moving.

Speaker 3 1:04:09

That's crazy. That's some Wilmington behavior.

Speaker 2 1:04:12

That's some 302. That's Philly too. That's some Philly shit Nah 215.

Speaker 3 1:04:18

That's in Philly. I'm going to say Philly is where.

Speaker 2 1:04:20

I've heard it the most Fuck you, bitch, you ugly, anyway, damn. Now I'm ugly because I don't want to talk to you. Your mom's ugly and she's a bitch and she's bald-headed. Really, I know that's usually my comeback.

Speaker 1 1:04:36

Your mom's a bitch.

Speaker 3 1:04:39

You know what I realized you have um get out of here you filthy animals thing. Yeah, I don't think you can let that go if it's.

Speaker 2 1:04:47

You know I say that with love, you guys, always. I don't mean that for real, but yeah, I'm trying to think takeaways.

Speaker 3 1:04:54

We're at an hour. Wow, our first hour episode.

Speaker 2 1:04:57

Yeah, it's time to wrap this shit up all.

Speaker 3 1:04:59

All right, let's wrap it up. If you haven't already, download whatnot? W-h-a-t-n-o-t, Download it. It's like QVC on crack. If you don't know what QVC is, it's live auctioning on steroids. You can get stuff for a dollar. You can get stuff for really expensive, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 1:05:16

Anything.

Speaker 3 1:05:25

You can literally buy livestock on there if you want to. Uh, also, if you want to subscribe, go ahead to fat and sweets. F-a-t-a-n-d-s-w-e-e-t-s dot buzzsproutcom and then click the little dollar sign at the top if you want to donate to the national negro fund of fat and sweets, which is three dollars a month yes, pennies, nickels and dimes, anything to say my black paying, our bills. We appreciate it for our current subscribers, with shout out to my boy, a riv, who just subscribed you to you to go.

Speaker 1 1:05:52

Thank you in there.

Speaker 3 1:05:53

Now I gotta send you your email. Definitely forgot, um, but I got that coming. And then, um, we got some announcements, bro. Uh, we are going to be in the next, I'd say five years. Let's be modest, uh, restaurant will be happening, candy store will be happening, merch will be happening. Stay tuned for the stuff, because this is now you got some books coming out, don't you a? Startup. Yeah, for Some books will be coming out, some stand-up comedy things will be happening, and you heard it here first.

Speaker 3 1:06:27

So don't be surprised when you see it. Okay, we're telling you now so that you know, we got big things planned for the next five to ten years, bro, we ain't going nowhere. We might take some hiatuses, you know? Is that the plural version of that word? We? Might take some gaps, some leaves of absence they know what we mean and uh but that doesn't mean we're not going to come back. It's a. It's a speed bump or a stop sign, not a red light there we go.

Speaker 3 1:06:55

I like that my mentor taught me that I like that.

Speaker 2 1:06:57

That's it, ladies. My takeaway is gonna be simple is stop being so boring and learn to laugh at yourselves so that you can make other people laugh too. It's okay to laugh at yourself so that other people can laugh with you, don't? Nobody want some boring ass bitch straight like that. But yeah, let's just. Let's just leave it at that. Anyway, chat, love you guys. Get the hell out of here.