The Untold Podcast
UNTOLD Podcast is where business, family, and life collide—raw, unfiltered, and brutally honest. No fluff, no fake success stories—just real conversations about the highs, the struggles, and everything in between.
The Untold Podcast
Episode 9 | Support Isn’t Always What You Think | UNTOLD Podcast
This week we’re talking about support, the real kind.
Not football teams or fake "you got this" messages.
We’re talking about the kind of support that keeps you standing when everything else is crumbling.
- What real support actually looks like (and why it’s not just about cuddles)
- Why asking for help is harder than people think
- Therapy: when it helps, when it hurts, and why it’s not a magic fix
- How not feeling supported can wreck you without you even realising it
- Why men bottle it up — and how that ends badly
- How our escapes — from golf to motorbikes to music — are keeping us sane
We got honest about how badly we need support, what happens when we don’t have it, and how much little things like a cuddle, a kind word, real listening, it can change everything.
No polish, no bullshit — just three blokes trying to make sense of it all.
If you’ve ever felt alone even when you weren’t, this one’s for you.
🔔 New episodes every Tuesday.
📲 Follow us on Instagram & TikTok: @UNTOLDPodcast.official
🎟️ Join us live at the Des Hamilton Roadshow — 30th May, Manchester. Tickets on sale now!
This week we are talking about support. When you go to therapy, you have to put the work in. The therapist isn't just going to unlock these things, the deepest, darkest secrets in this part of your brain that you aren't even aware of yourself.
Speaker 2:It's your own fault you're feeling depressed. It's your own fault, you're overweight.
Speaker 1:I just can't. I've tried so many times. That basically means it's crap. I am crap. How about you mate?
Speaker 3:It's a hard one for me, really. Quite a big question, to be fair.
Speaker 2:The Untold Podcast is proudly sponsored by Aura Surfaces, specialists in luxury surfaces for extraordinary spaces Like creating dream homes. Building a dream life takes work. That's why we had to get behind this podcast. Real stories, real challenges and real success. Let's get into it.
Speaker 1:This week we are talking about support, and I don't mean the sort of support that Aston Villa are going to get when they beat Crystal Palace in the FA Cup next week. It's what support actually looks like, because we as geezers actually need a cuddle and a nice word every now and then.
Speaker 3:So you've just had one off of us. I'm not giving you a cuddle, so that's a shame.
Speaker 1:oh no, look what I did with a nice word I've exploited it.
Speaker 2:Do you know what I'm going to butt in now? It is honestly the nicest. You said about it earlier. It is the nicest thing in the world. When my missus just comes up to me and gives me a cuddle, I wonder what he's going to say to you.
Speaker 1:I don't have to do that.
Speaker 2:Skydive Ash you don't you don't have to do it. What have we not forgot about the skydive? I thought we might have forgot about the bloody skydive oh dear, but no, you're right you're right.
Speaker 1:So what does support look like to you?
Speaker 2:support to me looks like people, people my voice is gone. Support to me looks like people just listening to you, just listening and understanding. Like that to me is everything like we're trying to do. We're not trying. We're doing this podcast, which is going to be really successful, and it's really important to me that my wife and my kids and my family and the people around me support me to do it and that's just like encouraging me, telling me no, you're going off the rails, you've got like. We all support each other in it, in everything we do. I support Chris on going on his lives on the TikTok just to give him a bit of banter while he's on there, to brighten up his night because he's been there for three hours. But no, do you know what I mean? To brighten up his night because he's been there for three hours? But no, do you know what I mean? Support, I think, is just support and having a support network of people that you can talk to, people that will listen and they will be honest with you in their replies.
Speaker 1:Yeah, nice.
Speaker 2:I think that's for me, that's support.
Speaker 1:How about you mate?
Speaker 3:I was going to say exactly what I said a minute ago. It's a hard one for me, really, A chair. It is a difficult. I think that's quite a big answer, big question, to be fair.
Speaker 1:It varies, doesn't it, on what you need at any given time.
Speaker 3:I mean, my missus is my biggest support. She always has been, and I have had some stupid ideas over the last 15 years, from starting a snowplow company when we don't have any snow.
Speaker 3:That's not even a joke, we were going to call it snow problem To just literally buying thousands of pounds worth of drones and pretending that I'm going to have a drone business and never actually doing anything with it Just everything I've always done. She's let me do it because she believes that one day I'll throw enough shit at the wall and something will stick. But like you, really, I suppose it's not. That doesn't necessarily feel supportive in a certain way. You just want, I think, it's more to be appreciated.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Not supported. Is that so?
Speaker 1:Maybe, maybe. But I think if that support from your other halves went away, you would notice it.
Speaker 3:Oh, a hundred percent, a hundred percent, I'd be an absolute stupid idiot. I wouldn't be making a snow plow company, I'd be making a, I'd be trying to buy an aeroplane company or something with 50p, yeah, and I'd live in a in a cardboard box somewhere. Probably you know what I mean, but no, it's I think. I think it's the appreciation of things like but to show your appreciation just with a cuddle, just with a thank you. I said to you boys earlier on that I got home from work the other day and my missus said to me, come in, give me a cuddle. And I was like what's going on here? Why does she want a cuddle? And she said I watched something on TikTok about how women don't appreciate what actually men do for them and I really appreciate you and that was probably the most nicest thing that she's done for a long time as far as I'm concerned.
Speaker 2:It's little things like that, though, that fucking fill you up.
Speaker 3:You could be having the worst day in the world. Give you that little warm, fuzzy feeling inside.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's tough isn't it Because? We go around. I can just say this from us three, but I'm going to say all men, I'm going to put half the population in this generalisation here but we don't go out asking for support, do we? We don't go out asking for praise or thanks, but when it comes, you think to yourself that was nice. You know you do, don't you?
Speaker 2:I do, though I always want praise. I go out fishing for it as much as I can have you not listened to his voice notes.
Speaker 3:Sorry, yeah, you're right, you're right. Thanks for the military.
Speaker 2:I'm joking, I'm joking yeah, chris didn't even wear it.
Speaker 3:Well, no, no, but you look at you look at some of the reviews we've had from the voice notes that we've shared around, like from people about the podcast already you know, like you tell me that you haven't listened to those those voice notes more than once. No, yeah, exactly the one that you sent, I think, not yesterday I listened to that like five times.
Speaker 1:Yeah, should we share around? That was from jemma yeah, yeah, amazing.
Speaker 3:You should. You know what you should actually do. You should actually, we should actually play one of them on the podcast one day. We should do. Yeah, I think that'd be quite a good. Uh, little thank you to the people that do those actually.
Speaker 2:So if you want to leave us a review, we might actually sort of pin some of those up in the in the future episodes and that's massive for me, like what I I think I've always noted you back saying that's amazing, that's proper filled, that's proper filled. My buckets up today of like, like pride in what we're doing, yeah, and why we're doing it. Obviously I know we're doing yeah and why we're doing it. Obviously I know we're all finding our feet. We don't know each other. Two months ago we didn't know each other from adam, so we're finding our feet. The banter's coming out, um, and hearing stuff like that from people is amazing, yeah it's amazing I'm not, I can't.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's no two ways about it. That is support. That is, that is support. Now here's the question what do you do?
Speaker 1:when the support from your other half and I've got to say as well, my Claire is amazing, amazing. I've had relationships where I didn't have support and there is no way I'd be where I am now if it wasn't for Claire. Yeah, likewise, it's almost just that blind faith and that trust that the mental things that we're trying are going to benefit them eventually, that the mental things that we're trying are going to benefit them eventually, and it also gives us the freedom. But the question is really is what do you do when the support from your other half or whatever support you've got at this level cannot answer the question that you're asking? If you need a level of expertise, if you need therapy, for example, how would you go about getting that? Are you guys adverse to that, or is that something that you both go down?
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, 100%. I think there's certain things in life that you need an outsider's perspective on it. You need a professional. There are people out there. There's a reason they're professionals in what they do. There's a reason that that is their job, and I think that it's really important that there's certain things. Business coaches, for example. If you're starting a business, it is advisable to have a business coach to help you. If you want to get fit, you hire a fitness coach. What's wrong with hiring someone to help your brain? What's wrong with hiring that person to I don't know to help you to ground you? Yeah, we do it, for we hire a cleaner because we want a cleaner. We hire a gardener because we want a gardener, but people are so reluctant to hire someone to help them internally yeah, it's a good point.
Speaker 1:I think I think mental health should be treated the same way as physical health. Now, I am mentally healthier than I am physically, I will say that. But I'm on top of my mental health much more than I'm on top of my physical health. I read mental health books. I read self-help books. I sit a call every week that usually has about 60 people in it, where we all talk about the mindset it takes to go. Basically, stay in a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset, cause if you're not growing, you're not moving. Ash, I think you need someone like a therapist or someone you can talk to or some sort of channel where you can actually exercise your mental wellbeing in order to keep on top of it. I think that's vital and I think that's one of the reasons why what we do is go in so well, chris, isn't it?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, I think it. First of all, I think therapy needs to be more accessible to everybody.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Because it's too expensive. If you go to a private person, I know they're very well trained and they deserve the money they charge. But I think a lot of people think that a therapy session is an unnecessary burden financially Because you can't just go once. You have to go back and back and back and back, Otherwise there's no point in going. So I think that's what puts a lot of people off. And it and back, otherwise there's no point in going. So I think that's what puts a lot of people off, and it goes back to what we said in last week's episode, didn't it the men that be strong? They don't talk to people, so the last thing they're going to go and do is spend their hard earned money sitting in front of someone that 100% I don't give a toss who you are is going to make you cry because of you that you didn't even believe was still there.
Speaker 1:Oh, mate, my nose was running oh mate.
Speaker 3:I went to therapy. Thankfully, my missus forced me to go to therapy years ago after my health scare. I was in bits within 30 seconds of being there in bits and bits and bits for weeks and then I stopped going because I couldn't go through it anymore. Really, yeah, it just destroyed me. It was going because I couldn't go through it anymore. Really, yeah, it just destroyed me. It was something that I couldn't cope with. I felt it better to deal with it myself than to go to a therapist, because I didn't like the way it made me feel. Every week I didn't look forward to going to the therapist because I knew I'd feel like shit when I left, right, right, but that's my unpacking. That doesn't mean it's going to be like that for everybody.
Speaker 1:No, because I felt the opposite. Yeah, I came away from the crying thinking I never knew that about me. I'm going to work on that. How long ago was that, Chris?
Speaker 2:four years. Yeah, see, how do you think you'd feel now? Probably not like I'm feeling now in a previous episode you said about 18 months ago you started opening up and talking yeah, yeah, different, because I'm obviously talking to a mate rather than somebody that I don't know, I don't, I feel.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to hypnotise you.
Speaker 3:I feel I feel a bit uncomfortable talking to people about my things, that you would talk to a therapist, to strangers or to friends. I've never spoken to my friends about what I spoke to a therapist.
Speaker 1:I think that's the thing when you go to therapy again. It's the unpacking mate. You've got to meet them. You have to put the work in. The therapist isn't just going to unlock these things. You have to work, don't you? Yeah, yeah, and you have to open up and you have to trust this absolute stranger with the deepest, darkest secrets and this part of your brain that you aren't even aware of yourself. It's a big deal. You're right, mate. You're right.
Speaker 3:I just didn't like the. I hated the fact that I had to pay for it, because I've always paid for things that feel good. I go to the pub and buy beer because I like the way it makes me feel. I go for a restaurant and buy a nice dinner because it makes me feel good.
Speaker 3:I go to the fair and I pay them and I walk away from there feeling like an emotionally battered and bruised person. You know, just it, just didn't I probably. I know I could benefit from going back to another one now. Um, you actually sent me somebody's name, didn't you?
Speaker 1:I did and again, she's brilliant, she's very reasonable, and I went for six weeks and on the last one she said you don't need to come back here for a while, so when things get bad again or if you're finding it was a limiting belief that started me there. It was this fact I think I've talked about this before I felt that my attitude towards society, life, money was the thing that was stopping me from getting out of it, and it was her. Then, basically, what we did do is that we unpacked a lot of the reasons why I felt like that by going back in time. Yeah, and I was a wreck, because it turned out there was limiting beliefs, subconsciously, that I was completely unaware of or born out of, this feeling of not being worthy. But it made me work on that and if I ever have any problems, I'll go back to it. 100%, 100% and I can't recommend it enough.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I've never done independent therapy, obviously, me and my wife. When I saw a therapist about sort of relationship and communication with each other, more, um, I turned to. I've said in another episode, I turned to mindfulness and a mindfulness course Cause a lot of the shit that was going on in my head was never going to come to fruition. It was just my brain telling me the worst case scenario. And doing that mindfulness and, of course, with different people, has changed the way I think about it and the way I think about things and the way I interpret lots of different things. Emotional I don't really act on emotion anymore, I act on sort of logic, whereas before I used to things. Emotional I don't really act on emotion anymore, I act on sort of logic, whereas before I used to be very emotional. If you said something nasty to me, I'd take it in personally and be like, oh, my God he doesn't like me, whereas now I'd be like hold on.
Speaker 2:why is he saying that? And then try and put some context behind it. What have I done? Et cetera, and I think that for me, that changed everything.
Speaker 1:for me, yeah, but again there's a line, isn't there? Really, you don't want to go too far down that road because you end up self-sabotaging well, that's it.
Speaker 2:That's it, and I think that a lot of these courses are made by professionals to not take you too far. You can do more if you want. You can do less if you want. It's kind of I don't know. I think like I would like to go and see a therapist.
Speaker 1:Just, you're right, it's about finding, it's about finding the thing that's been holding you back and then addressing it rather than laboring on it. Yeah, yeah, I completely agree, because the thing that wrecked me in that first session. We touched on it again, but never at the same angle. You know what I mean. It was more a case of right now is an opportunity to better yourself, because you know now how that made you feel. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Yeah, why do you feel the way you feel? What can you do? What can you do to put things in place, to or to understand it?
Speaker 1:Exactly, and my, it was my approach to many relationships that had sort of either inbuilt resentment, and it was the therapist that actually said to me these are all your problems, mate. This is on you to change your opinion on why you're feeling like that towards them. And if you want to talk to these people about it, talk to them about it, but if you don't, don't but learn to live with it, because it's not their fault that you feel like this. Yeah, yeah, because it's not their fault that you feel like this. Yeah, yeah, and it's really interesting.
Speaker 2:It is interesting. It is interesting how we internalise quite a lot.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:We internalise our feelings and we think that it's actually someone else's fault, when it's not at all it's your own fault.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's your own fault you're feeling depressed. It's your own fault that you're overweight.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Comes back to the same old thing, mate.
Speaker 1:If I have a joke that offends you, it's a you problem, isn't?
Speaker 2:it. That's your choice to be offended. That's it, Unless you're personally at someone saying like you're a four-eyed speckly fat, Do you?
Speaker 3:know what I mean. That's a little bit. No, I'm the only one wearing glasses in this room.
Speaker 2:Don't worry, it's not you do you know what I mean? It is alright, specky fat what I was joking. I was joking, it was a joke.
Speaker 1:Come on, don't be offended it was a joke, I'm still going to. Can I book a session?
Speaker 3:but yeah, I mean, I just want to say I've been sitting here thinking about what I just said about therapists, like it's really important. Obviously the whole intention is to help people. Don't think for one minute that a therapist is going to be shit for you. Yeah, because the reason that I didn't like it was because of the unpacking. It was nothing else, it was the, the unpacking, the big, dirty, great, big dark box in my head that I've put everything in well, like you said, it's not the therapist, is it?
Speaker 3:yeah, um, once you've unpacked that, I'm sure it'll be fucking brilliant and you'll get loads out of it. But I just really did not enjoy, at that particular moment in time, just the unpacking procedure but that's alright, because it was so so difficult but then you've gone and found other ways to get support.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I have.
Speaker 3:Yeah yeah, but I just, you know a therapist is a good thing, 100%. I just I'd hate for somebody to be listening out of the 26 people and genuinely think that I meant do not go and see a therapist, because that's not really what I meant. It was just giving my perspective at the time.
Speaker 2:I know people that have been to a therapist once and it's changed everything. They've literally managed to unpack. There was one little thing that was holding them back in life. There was that one tiny little thing could have been childhood, and they've gone to see a therapist once and it's changed everything, so it works. But again, what works for one person won't necessarily work for another. It's like going back to support. What is support for you? Support could be someone giving you a hug when you're feeling down. Support could be your mate pushing you to do that Hydrox thing.
Speaker 1:It could be the Hydrox itself. A lot of people go to exercise for therapy, don't they? Yeah?
Speaker 2:and it does work. But I'm now on a completely opposite trajectory, because if I weigh over 16 stone, I can't do a skydive. So watch this space, is that?
Speaker 3:what it is. Well, I'll be watching from the sidelines as well.
Speaker 1:I'm on the cusp. Here we go. You've lost weight, mate. You must be about 13 stone now.
Speaker 2:Surely see if I take these glasses off but yeah, I think there are so many different versions of support do you know, what I love when I get home from work is my support.
Speaker 3:The most support I ever ever get is to walk through my front door and my missus go hi darling, and the little boy to go daddy, not darling. Oh, what's up with him, don't talk to me. That's. That's like oh, I've had such a hard day at work, I'm so glad I'm home.
Speaker 1:Take that bit out actually my little girl's in that lovely phase at the moment where she could go 20 minutes without seeing us. And if I, my little girl's in that lovely phase at the moment where she could go 20 minutes without seeing us, and if I was to walk down the stairs, hi, daddy, hi, hi, and the big little wave, like that is so lovely, it's so lovely. I love this little age. I mean she's a moo, but yeah, she is lovely.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, but my, my seven year old one minute she can be, and you'll meet her soon and you'll think, oh, but I won't melt. Oh, she's such an adorable little girl, until she doesn't get her own way. And you'll be like what I heard schoolteachers, they're like no, she's not like that. Yeah, well, you wait, but she's the cutest kid. The other night she said well, come on, it's bedtime, it's nine o'clock, I need some water. And you can't shout at that no.
Speaker 2:You can't shout at that. She's got a little onesie on and she's doing a little dance across the thing Before you even say what are you doing up? You should be in bed. She knows what's coming.
Speaker 1:She's like.
Speaker 2:I need some water and it's like you little. But yeah kids are a big form of support.
Speaker 1:What's your biggest form of escapism?
Speaker 2:Oh, what's your biggest form of escapism? Oh, my biggest form of escapism is doing something for myself the motorbike in the summer. Yeah, the motorbike in the summer Last summer was a bit naff, but it's like a Sunday morning thing or a Saturday morning thing and I've got a mate who we ride with and, to be fair, it stopped me drinking as well. Because if I know I'm going out on the bike on a Saturday morning thing and I've got a mate who we ride with and it to be fair, it stopped me drinking as well, because if I know I'm going out on the bike on a Sunday morning, I won't drink on Saturday night. So we get up early six half six, weather's nice and we'll go somewhere, just have a breakfast and then we're normally back by 10 half 10 and then you've still got the day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I like that. I've started playing golf, which my mates absolutely love. Golf, they play it 24 hours a day, seven days a week. For me it's a nice escape, bit of exercise out in the fresh air. Only when the weather's nice, though, I'm one of these fair weather golfers.
Speaker 1:I'd really like to get into golf. I just can't. I've tried. I've tried so many times. That basically means it's crap, I am crap, I'm crap and I'm too old now to learn something new and not be very good at it, especially something that hurts and lasts hours on a night file. I'm in pain and I've got another.
Speaker 3:I'm only halfway through you've run out of golf balls by now. That's what it is.
Speaker 2:Definitely my mate did like 36 holes in two days or something, wow. He did like 18 in the morning and 18 one evening.
Speaker 1:That's what the pros do, right, they do the mornings and an afternoon.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I'd like to do it. I do enjoy it Like golf is at the moment. I enjoy it when it's good. Golf is good.
Speaker 3:Ash was thinking about doing a sponsored golf day.
Speaker 1:Now he's doing a sponsored skydive, dive, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was gonna do a golf day before we get a few people together, we'll do a nice little.
Speaker 2:I'd rather charity, yeah, um, but no, yeah, that's, that's my escapism. What about you, chris? What do you do to escape?
Speaker 3:I don't really have one. To be fair now, what's golf? Gave it up to work harder and look how happy you are.
Speaker 1:Yeah, um, ask me that in six months time yeah, six months time because when we me that in six months time because when we're in Australia this time next week it'll be my last week at work, so I'm hoping to have more time to my hands, so we'll see then.
Speaker 3:But it was golf, I'd say probably. I always, I always used to have this thing where once a year I would do something stupid. So I'd do a stupid, so I'd do a skydive, I'd do London Marathon, I'd do a bungee jump or do something. I mean we were supposed to go and-.
Speaker 1:I love it. London Marathon once a year. It's four months of training. We were supposed to row the locks the entire length of Scotland.
Speaker 3:The other three years ago, two years ago, my mate's done it but I haven't. I haven't done anything stupid for a couple of years, so hence the idea of the skydive. But yeah, you always used to be that because I'd either have to lose weight so I'd have to force myself into running, or, yeah, we'd have to just something. It would be something really to do with, I suppose, fitness, because bungee jumps, skydiving, you need to lose weight. Exercise, I suppose, is quite a good thing, because I just used to like to punish myself a little bit. Really, yeah, fair enough, the thing is for me as well, like setting a challenge.
Speaker 2:Setting a task is the way that I will do exercise. I won't just go to. I won't just go and exercise because I know I should. I need to have something to work towards, so yeah, actually day out of the football.
Speaker 3:This is it.
Speaker 1:I'm amazed you didn't say day out of the football. This is it. I'm amazed you didn't say football day out of the football, it's because I've known it for so long.
Speaker 3:That's what it is. Yeah, it's true hopefully next Saturday hopefully next Saturday will be my release day.
Speaker 1:Yeah, weeks after that, as well, but yeah, football, mate football it doesn't even have to be a day out. It can be football on the telly, yeah.
Speaker 2:But for me it's yeah, football, definitely.
Speaker 1:I love the wrestling. Still WrestleMania weekend this weekend. Cody Rhodes, john Cena, anyway, we got I love going to a local park I think I said this to you before on Voice Notes Like a Sunday morning. We've got a big park where around I live with like football pitches and rugby pitches and tennis courts and you with like football pitches and rugby pitches and tennis courts and you go there on a Saturday or Sunday morning and it is heaving with activity. Love that, just walking the dog around, just taking in everything. Be careful walking around the park, though I know over and over again, yeah, that big overall hoodie that I wear.
Speaker 3:Get some looks, just wear the wear the dry robe not the match. Don't wear that grey match you got.
Speaker 1:But mostly it's music. Yeah, it's music. I have to have music everywhere, everywhere, even when I'm not listening to music. I've got those pictures behind my head.
Speaker 3:It's a really good point actually, that is a really good point. Music, music is everywhere, isn't it, yeah, and you don't realise how much music can affect your mind. So when I do my lives on TikTok, I actually play techno, do you?
Speaker 1:Yeah, really random.
Speaker 2:You have to, though, wouldn't you?
Speaker 3:But it really does keep me way more upbeat. I try to put relaxing music on and it just kills me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, right A bit of a push-pull thing, yeah, music one. Actually music is life again, because when you're in a room and there's no music on bloody how you know, is it?
Speaker 2:yeah, you, really, when you, when we come in here in the mornings, first thing I do alexa plays the music have to yeah and it's just, yeah, it's. Uh, it is a big big, isn't it?
Speaker 1:when you drive anywhere.
Speaker 2:I can't drive the car without having some sort of music.
Speaker 3:I have to listen to a bloody podcast now. This is the thing I've tried podcasts.
Speaker 1:I've tried audio books in the car, but I can't do it. I know that I'll get more, but you should, everybody yeah, you should, especially this one, especially the Untold podcast if you say something that fuels your soul.
Speaker 1:I know I get more enjoyment from music than I would do an audio book, for example, but it is, yeah, it is interesting. And the other thing for me and again, you only notice it when it's not there. I go weird if there's not a body of water somewhere in my one mile radius of where I am. That is a bit weird to be fair, isn't it.
Speaker 2:I thought he was going to say a body of water in the cup holder in the car.
Speaker 3:I haven't got something to drink around me.
Speaker 1:No, honestly, I don't know whether it's growing up in Brighton or what, but I need the sea. If I can't have the sea, I need a river or a lock or something. I love the sea. I have to. Yeah, I go weird, I hate it.
Speaker 3:Do you? There's my disagreement I love the sea. The sea's good for one thing, and one thing only. What's that Getting wet? I was going to say weaning Jet skis, that is it. I'll go on a jet ski, but you will not find me swimming in the sea. Not a chance. I don't want to get eaten by a monster, Not necessarily in England but anywhere, anywhere, mate, I'll go like knee-high.
Speaker 1:I don't want to get eaten by a monster.
Speaker 3:But there's monsters in there.
Speaker 2:There are. When we went to Lanzarote a couple of years ago, we rented a boat out and we we were just swimming off the back of the boat, my kids were fishing and I was like I'm going to go swimming and there was this ray like honestly, it must've been 75 foot across, like literally above my feet, and I was like, and I was like hold on a minute, like and I just got the snorkel goggles and just was just watching this ray Like I love to see. I absolutely love to see. Like I love the sea. I absolutely love the sea. It's my happy place being up, bobbing around on a boat. When I was young, I was privileged enough that my parents bought a little boat, a little weekender boat, lovely, instead of a caravan. We had a boat down at Chichester, that's nice. It had a dinghy and we had the dinghy as well.
Speaker 2:I used to love it Like bombing around the Chichester Marina on the dinghy, but that is my. My happy places out at sea, like when I go on holiday, first thing I do. What boat trip can I book this week? Where can I go on a boat? And I managed to get. My missus will go in the sea on a paddle board and she's very much like you. She thinks there's monsters that are going to eat. I couldn't think of anything worse.
Speaker 3:I would like to do it. Not only are you on the sea in the middle of nowhere, I'd want one of those cabins under the water, a giant octopus covered with cucumber swallowing the boat A giant octopus. But if you are surrounded by a bunch of pricks, you're surrounded by pricks. You can't get away from these people, no why would you want to go there? At least if you're on land, you could just go down the beach somewhere else or something, but oh god, doing a cruise.
Speaker 1:It's something I want to go back to, where his default was a giant octopus of all the things that could get you in the sea, climb up the side of the boat and surround it
Speaker 2:this giant fucking cruise ship, oh dear. No, yeah, I love the sea. It is my to be fair, that would be like escapism. If I could, would just like the paddleboard. I remember I went on a holiday once and, uh, I went on holiday with a lady friend at the time and after two days I could not stand to even breathe the same air as her like being on a cruiser. So I went and hired a kayak and said can I wait for the whole day? He's like being on a cruiser, isn't it? So I went and hired a kayak and said can I have it for the whole day?
Speaker 2:he's like you want it for the whole day I was like yeah and I just literally just out on the kayak, just up and down like bobbing around at the sea, just thinking any holiday, whether it's a lads holiday or a holiday with the family.
Speaker 3:I don't want a swimming pool. Are you doing?
Speaker 2:that there's monsters in the swimming pool.
Speaker 3:They live in them little filters, the chlorine gets them, doesn't it?
Speaker 2:yeah, so that's what the chlorine's for.
Speaker 3:You didn't know it's not to get rid of your waist.
Speaker 1:Kill the monsters that's kill the monsters. My boy having a pony, that's the only monster in the swimming pool. I don't necessarily believe in Nildis, but just curious. What star sign are you Aquarius? Yeah, mate, that's interesting. So I'm Cancer. They're both water signs, aren't they? What are you? Are they Gemini? No, I don't. Two-faced bastards, careful boys yeah yeah, interesting, isn't it? Yeah.
Speaker 2:Interesting. Yeah, no, I love to see is as well. I walk in just walking along a beach. I can walk for miles and miles and miles and not get bored on my own just walking along the beach like feet in the water when you know when it comes up and it's all nice and sandy.
Speaker 3:I'll do that. I don't mind that I'll brew you that one definitely.
Speaker 1:Yeah, love a walk on a beach so, if we bring this back, wrap it up the old, the old adage is true, isn't it? Men are very simple creatures, aren't we?
Speaker 3:Well, we are. Humanity is simple, isn't it?
Speaker 1:We've just made life difficult, yeah that's true, but so far all we really need is a cuddle every now and then, some form of sport, some form of holiday.
Speaker 3:And a day out with the lads.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that sounds like a dream, doesn't it? Oh, and meat and meat, yeah, yeah, yeah. And beer, yeah, meat and beer. Actually, we need quite a lot to be fair. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:We do need quite a lot. Yeah, yeah and other things, yeah.
Speaker 3:I was going to say I don't know what I was saying WrestleMania, yeah, WrestleMania.
Speaker 1:I was saying that Good, good, but no yeah.
Speaker 2:When it comes to support, there are so many different methods of support. Isn't there. You might need financial support, you might need emotional support, you might need mental support. You might need someone just putting their foot up your ass telling you to sort your shit out. That's it.
Speaker 3:I feel like we talk about partners a lot in our podcast because we've all got other halves and we've all got misses in that.
Speaker 1:Support must be difficult for people that don't have a household of people to go home to I think that's the takeaway in it, because even though we're all saying roughly the same things, it all varies on you as a person to know what you enjoy the most. So where you said motorbikes, I mean what you said football football, that's right and mine was mostly music it's Football, football, that's right, and mine was mostly music.
Speaker 1:It's find the thing, find the thing that makes you happy. It sounds so simple and do that. It really does, doesn't it.
Speaker 2:Make time for it. Yeah, that's it. Make time for it. We spoke about it. Don't feel guilty because you want to do something for yourself for an hour a week. Yeah, don't Just do it, that's true, an hour Next Saturday.
Speaker 3:I'm leaving my house at eight in the morning. I'm getting home at midnight. Miserable, that is not an hour and I'll be probably unhappy. All right.
Speaker 2:Find the time to do the thing you love. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:Because it's good for the soul.
Speaker 2:And encourage the people in your life To do the same. To do the same. Your missus, your parents, go and enjoy yourself. We only get one life that's it don't feel guilty for doing the things that you want to do. Yeah, that's it, unless you're being a prick about it don't be a prick about it, alright?
Speaker 1:I think that's the best way to wrap it up, boys don't be a prick.
Speaker 2:Don't be a prick, don't be a prick.
Speaker 1:Thank you everybody for coming back. Please leave reviews. If you've made it this far, I'm guessing you liked it, so please give us a review. It really matters because it drives the algorithm. It gets us in front of more people. Everybody wins well, us three in this room. But we also then have got the ability to start bringing in guests and start decking this out with more clobber and actually start growing, growing, growing and making differences, because that's what we want to do, right? Everybody say goodbye, goodbye everybody, everybody see you next time.