From Burnout to Clarity: Donna Tashjian on Identity, Peace & Purpose-Driven Leadership

What if the success you’re chasing is actually draining you?
In this powerful conversation, Destiny Activator and Life Mastery Coach Donna Tashjian joins David Dahlén D'Cruz to explore how leaders can stop performing, start aligning, and finally experience clarity, peace, and purpose from within.

This episode is for aspiring leaders and young professionals ready to break free from false identities and step into a life that’s led by spiritual intelligence, inner calm, and authentic impact.

(Full description)
“Many leaders are outwardly successful but inwardly exhausted.”
Sound familiar?

In this deep and inspiring episode of Life & Leadership Connected, host David Dahlén D'Cruz sits down with Donna Tashjian, founder of Vibrant Living International and creator of the Spiritual Intelligence Method™, to talk about what it really means to lead from the inside out.

From overcoming a traumatic childhood to becoming a powerful coach and speaker, Donna shares how she helps high-capacity leaders rediscover peace, clarity, and God-given purpose.

🔹 Why false identities keep us stuck
🔹 How inner peace, not performance, fuels lasting impact
🔹 What spiritual intelligence means in leadership
🔹 The hidden cost of burnout — and how to recover
🔹 How to align success with faith and calling

Whether you're navigating leadership burnout, craving deeper meaning, or stepping into a new season of purpose, this episode will leave you encouraged, empowered, and equipped to live and lead from the inside out.

Transcript

0:05

Our stories don't always begin the way that would be a reflection of where we end up. And mine is very much in alignment with that statement. I was a mother at the age of 15 and you remember where you were when you were 15? And it's like sometimes we forget what that was like. And it wasn't by choice. So there was abuse involved and things like that. So there is a lot to process. So I am a very injured, scared, angry, terrified, and a mom all mixed into one and beginning my journey. But I had an experience with God at a very young age. And so I was developing a relationship with Him. Excuse me. And that's what pulled me through that difficult time and learning to be able to know that there is something that you're supposed to do. I always knew when people say, what are you gonna do when you grow up? I said, I'm gonna help people. I had no more definition than what that is and that has developed and expanded and changed over the years that I have been serving God and learning what leadership really looks like. It has been a quest that I have been on to learn to live from rest and not rest is when you crash, but live from a state of rest and peace and grace. And one of the biggest things that I have noticed, not only in my own life, but these leaders, is that we are very performance. Our identity is linked to our performance. If I constantly have to prove my worth, even to God, if I constantly have to feel like I have to be validated or I have to, there's this next thing, because there's always another thing. Whatever project, whatever goal, whatever it is, we never celebrate what has actually happened. We're always going for the next thing, and that's exhausting. And it also creates that state of unrest on the inside. And so peace and rest comes from the inside out. I have been under all different kinds of serving and one of the biggest revelations to continue to realize is leadership is not a title. Leadership isn't a name on your door or any of those things. Leadership is serving. And there's so many people who are truly leaders that may not carry a title. It's something that comes from, I believe, God. It isn't something that, because I was a leader when I didn't have a title. I led in every place that I was. And I didn't often recognize what was going on in my life because of my own insecurities. And so learning to be able to recognize, just, all I need to do is to be who I am in every room I'm in, Zoom room, real room, whatever, what any room I'm in, and be who God has called me to be, say what he's called me to say, and be authentic and serve. And how can I serve you? To me, that is true leadership. Hello and warm welcome to the Life and Leadership Connected podcast. I am David Dahlén D'Cruz and I'm so excited you're here today. In this podcast we dive into what really matters. Finding your life's purpose. Discovering your 'why'. and learning how to connect life and leadership in a healthy and sustainable way. What fuels your energy and passion? How do we grow and stay as leaders who make a real difference? inspiration to live with greater purpose and lead with heart. Want to learn more? Visit lifeleadershipconnected.com. I'm your guide and coach, David Dahlén D'Cruz. Let's get started. Hello and welcome to a new episode of the podcast life and leadership connected podcast. And today I have the honor have a guest here whose name is Donna Tashjian. Donna Tashjian, is that pronounce your your name? You did that very well. It's Tashjian, yes. Okay, thank you. Thank you. Donna is, destiny activator, Holy Spirit-led life mastery coach. And she is a visionary founder of something called "Vibrant Living International". And she's also the creator of something called the "Spiritual Intelligence This is a Christ-centered framework that has helped thousands of leaders, high achievers and visionaries to step into their God-given potential with renewed confidence and purpose. And she has over 30 years of experience. to guide people the world to move from confusion, burnout or hesitation into clarity, confidence spirit-led action. Her clients often call her the 'Truth-Exposer' and a 'Fear-buster'. They describe working with her as a life-changing journey for the mind, body, and soul. And she also is the host of a podcast called the 'Vibrant Living Podcast'. And she's also a sought after speaker and the author of three transformational books that help readers break limitations and live from identity, not for it. And she lives in Grand Rapids, Michigan in the United States of America. So is this something I missed, Donna, or is it the correct? that that covers a lot of it, yes. Good, thank question to you, Donna, tell us a little bit about who you are. You have such a powerful story and a strong calling for helping leaders find clarity, purpose and peace. So tell me a little bit about you begin that story? your lifestyle begin? that shaped your calling? We don't, Our stories don't always begin the way that would be a reflection of where we end up. And mine is very much in alignment with that statement. I was a mother at the age of 15 and you remember where you were when you were 15? And it's like sometimes we forget what that was like. And it wasn't by choice. So there was abuse involved and things like that. So there is a lot to process. So I am a very injured, scared, angry, terrified, and a mom all mixed into one and beginning my journey. But I had an experience with God at a very young age. And so I was developing a relationship with Him. Excuse me. And that's what pulled me through that difficult time and learning to be able to know that there is something that you're supposed to do. I always knew when people say, what are you gonna do when you grow up? I said, I'm gonna help people. I had no more definition than what that is and that has developed and expanded and changed over the years that I have been serving God and learning what leadership really looks like. I experienced a lot of times where no matter what room I was in it always seemed like I was all of a sudden in a leadership position and it wasn't really something I was seeking. It was actually something I resisted because being seen was dangerous in my subconscious mind. Being noticed was painful and had caused problems in my... So that was one of the healing process that God took me through is how it was okay to be visible and be seen and to actually step in to the leadership calling on his life. But I get story after story where just I was all of a sudden put in charge of things that my age or experience didn't quote merit, if you will. And it just continued to happen. Now there were also some people who tried to, for not knowing how else to say it, keep you in a box. and to control what the call of God was on my life. But I learned to never get angry and I learned to just follow what God said and trust his timing for how it would look and how it would come about. And I'm still doing that today. Wow, yeah, interesting. Many leaders you work with, feel outwardly successful, but inwardly tired, misaligned, or maybe disconnected. do you think that's such a common experience, especially for high achievers? It has been a quest that I have been on to learn to live from rest and not rest is when you crash, but live from a state of rest and peace and grace. And one of the biggest things that I have noticed, not only in my own life, but these leaders, is that we are very performance. Our identity is linked to our performance. If I constantly have to prove my worth, even to God, if I constantly have to feel like I have to be validated or I have to, there's this next thing, because there's always another thing. Whatever project, whatever goal, whatever it is, we never celebrate what has actually happened. We're always going for the next thing, and that's exhausting. And it also creates that state of unrest on the inside. And so peace and rest comes from the inside out. And so it is learning what is causing that "I'm not enough"."I need to do more". It's performing. I mean, it started in the Garden of Eden. They thought that they were going to have to do something for their identity and they already were like God. They were already created in his image and we that just that whole thing just continues to happen in our lives today. Some people don't know their identity. Sometimes a false identity sneaks in. What would you say are some signs someone that might be living from a false identity? Lack of peace is a good sign. A constant dissatisfaction. And dissatisfaction is not necessarily a bad thing. There's usually dissatisfaction right before growth because it needs a catalyst to get there. When I talk about stopping identity theft, that's one of my phrases. And of course, I'm not talking about our finances. But let's just take about me. In some settings, I'm a woman. I'm not supposed to be in leadership. And that's just the case it is in some places. And then I'm also an unwed mother. Early on, mean, I'm married and, you know, moved on with life and things like that. My husband and I have been married 40 years, but, you know, there's just these labels that either people put on me. I'm not good enough. I don't know. I'm my education maybe isn't good enough. I don't know how to speak right. How can I write a book? Look at where you started. Those were thoughts I came up that were in my mind as I move through. The different phases in my life and so we get these labels that are attached to us. ah You know you're divorced you're you lost a job you went bankrupt or whatever all these labels that get put on us that make us feel like we're not good enough and so it's identifying. Those and it's saying who does God say I am. And that's different, somewhat for each one of us. We are loved and we are special and we are fearfully and wonderfully made. That is all of us. But there's something about you, David, that makes you his beloved. And there's something about me, just like our children. They're so different, but we love every one of them. And so it's learning to be able to receive that, not just know it. but to receive it so it's an experience. And that's one of the things I help people do. Wow. I asked you a question about your superpowers. And one of your superpowers is prophetic clarity and spiritual discernment your ability to activate leaders into alignment. And can you maybe unpack that, what it looks like in your coaching work? And maybe for those that are not Christian, maybe explain a little bit what prophetic means and so on. Prophetic simply means hearing from your spirit. If you, you would liken it to your intuition, but, our intuition isn't always accurate. We not always hear it correctly is a better way of saying it. as we grow and how to hear from God, and I'm still doing that. It doesn't mean that we have it all down. It's something that... So someone has a challenge that's going on in their business, their life, whatever it is, I don't immediately answer. I'm on the inside, if you will, an interior dialogue of, God, what do you say about this? And that's one of the things that makes me different. is that I'm not just, I mean, I've got years of experience. I could probably answer it. I could probably give you a quick answer, but what's the answer you need? What's the answer that that particular leader needs to be able to move through and get to the clarity. So that's, it's hard to give an exact example of what that looks like, but that's how it would go is I'm not, and even I will have said, I'll get back to you tomorrow. I don't have to have a fast answer necessarily. If I need to feel like I have more time to actually hear what God has to say, usually the way it works for me is he'll give me a question to ask. And as I ask you a question and then maybe another question that comes up, then you get, that's what it is. It's not so much me telling you, it's me guiding you. Hmm. hear from God for yourself so that you can know what that next step looks like. Does that make sense? Yeah, think so. Yeah, Because as you said, we're all different and you cannot have a standard answer to everyone. And because something outside of us, you know, is giving you something, you're dependent on that. So you have to listen also, know, listen in order to give something to somebody else, I guess. have a recent story or a moment where you saw someone shift from confusion to burnout and to clarity and purpose? Yeah, one of my clients is a founder of a nonprofit movement that is helping at-risk kids with STEM education in school districts. And STEM is science, technology, engineering, and math. I had to think a minute. She's a woman and she's a widow. She has two children. And when she came to me in the school district that she worked in, she was serving about 60 children. She was not taking, her health was not doing super. She was keeping her head above water, but barely. But she had a vision to take it international even, or to national, I mean. And struggling with that. And as we began to work together, over a short period of time, she went from serving 60 to a thousand. She had increased her team, her health was better, her relationships with her kids were better. And I said, so you're serving more kids and it's easier. She's like, how does that happen? And that happens when you learn how to find out what's holding you back. What are the things that's stopping you from working from grace and ease? And part of it was hiring a team and how she felt about that. She needed to do everything herself. There was a lot of different things, capacities that were going on that made that shift. But between 60 and a thousand, that's a lot of difference. Hmm. Children that are now being touched and lives are being changed because she took the time to do the inner work and she's continuing to do so. Good, thank you. Tell me about your leadership, of yourself and others and maybe about some of the challenges and milestones that have shaped you into the person you are today and maybe are some of the most important lessons you've learned as a leader? I have been under all different kinds of serving and one of the biggest revelations to continue to realize is leadership is not a title. Leadership isn't a name on your door or any of those things. Leadership is serving. And there's so many people who are truly leaders that may not carry a title. It's something that comes from, I believe, God. It isn't something that, because I was a leader when I didn't have a title. I led in every place that I was. And I didn't often recognize what was going on in my life because of my own insecurities. And so learning to be able to recognize, just, all I need to do is to be who I am in every room I'm in, Zoom room, real room, whatever, what any room I'm in, and be who God has called me to be, say what he's called me to say, and be authentic and serve. And how can I serve you? To me, that is true leadership. And learning how to do that, don't have to prove myself. I don't have to force it. I don't have to fight for what's mine. I just be who I am and serve who I am. And that's one of the biggest things that I have seen in leadership, because I've seen leadership make people."I'm the leader, I'm the whatever title it is, and you have to listen to me". And there's some truth to perhaps a little bit of that, but I could get it done a whole lot differently in the way that I approach you. And so learning to be a leader is leading, it's not making people follow. And it's learning how to do that from a place of servanthood. Yeah, good, thank you. lot of young professionals say they want to find their true identity, but have no idea where to begin. And I wonder, how would you guide someone to start discovering who they really are in God and uncovering their unique calling and purpose? Well, that's about an hour conversation. Yeah, Yes. The biggest thing is you said their identity in God and with God and stuff. So one of my first questions is how are you in God? And doing, and I have a... assessment, for lack of a better word, of taking people through on, "I mean, I guess we're okay". How do I even answer that? I most of it, most of the time we, "I think we're fine" How do we really quantify what that looks like and how we're really doing?"Well, I read my Bible or I go to church or I pray or I talk to him". It's like, okay, so, but that doesn't answer because I can have a conversation with my husband and not really close to him. I can say, the trash out or I need you to do this, but that doesn't mean we're feeling close at the time. At this time, 40 years, we've had moments where that wasn't the case. So how are you and God is one of the things for identity is because if we're getting our identity with who God created, the creator who created you, he knows who you are. He knows all the parts of you. on the little quirks and the ones you like and the ones you don't like. He knows it all and so finding out what he says about us is first of all most important. Second thing I would say about purpose it´s is different somewhat than identity is what makes you smile and what makes you happy when you're doing it. What do you do that time just passes and you can't believe it's been that long? um Or another flip side of that coin is what makes you mad. What gets you riled. And because there is something about when we notice a need, we're probably called to meet it. Because not every, it's like, 'why can't everybody else see this problem?" Not everybody else is called to try to do something about that problem. And so one of those things is it lights you up and like when you're doing that, you lose track of time or it could be the flip side of that, or both it could be. It's like, but when that need is missing, it's like one of the things that makes me mad is when I see, when I see people living below what their identity is. And that I get, I'm like, so helping people to see that. So those are a couple of things about stepping into your purpose. And, the other thing I would say is get someone to help you. We weren't really meant to do this alone. We are such in a generation where in America we call it DIY and yet do it yourself. Yeah. There's videos, there's a video for absolutely everything. It's like somebody's made a video on YouTube, having information isn't wisdom on how to apply it to me, because the world is full of it, of information. But how do I apply it to my life? How do I make that work for me? And being a voice, not an echo. Thank you. Thank you. I wonder also gives you life in the work you've chosen to focus on, Donna, and how do you keep your energy high level day by day? Yeah, I have learned to make rest, whatever that is, rejuvenation for me a priority. The more you serve, the more that is needed, whatever that looks like for us. And I don't feel guilty about it. And so, but there was a time I did. ah So I put, I put regular rest times, break times. It's in my calendar. And I don't know what I'm going to be doing necessarily that time. But if somebody says, can you meet during that time that's on my calendar, then it has to be pretty important for me to say, I'm sorry, I already have an appointment at that time is all I have to say. But the other main thing that keeps me that is my morning routine. And the way that you begin your day, one of my things that I share is how to create a 15 minute miracle. And that - mine is longer than 15 minutes at this point, but I began with 15 minutes. That's what I would get up earlier. I would get up 15 minutes earlier than necessary and do a 15 minute routine of time with God, time of prayer, time of music, time of walking, whatever it may be, something that begins to set the course of my day Hmm. from the way that you begin it. And those two things is the way I stay energized. Good, thank have created something called"Spiritual Intelligence Method" which helps people align their success with purpose but without burning out and striving. you explain a little bit what is this method and how do you... Can you give some points about what means? Yeah. Everything that we're around us was first a thought before it became a thing. The desk we're at, the chairs we're sitting in, the houses we're in, the computers, everything was a thought. Somebody had this in mind that they thought they would create it before it became a thing. And the world was created just the same way. God thought, spoke, and it was so. And when we realize that everything begins with the unseen, it changes the way that you live. My method teaches people how to do that. Because we have been, from the time we were born, we've lived from our five senses. If I can't, you I need to see it, I need to touch it, I need to taste it, I need to be able to quantify it. And it's hard to quantify something that I can't yet see, if I will. And there's a whole lot of Bible verses that talks about the things that are unseen and faith and what that means and all of that. So how do you do that? And so that's what God gave me, the spiritual intelligence method to give people the tools, the handles to be able to create things like that. So I, in one of my programs called the 'Life by Design, not by default', creating a life by design, not just letting life happen to us. I don't know if you've heard this, but it's a saying that it's, know, say some people lived to be 90 and we'll take them from age 20 to 90. in that 50 years, did they live 50 years or did they live one year 50 times? And so it's how to create a life by design. I call it co-partnering with God to create your life. And in this program, I teach 11 laws, guidelines, principles, wisdom on the way to conduct yourself so that you're creating a life on purpose. So that's an overview of a way that the method works. Good, thank you. I wonder what gives you purpose and meaning in life, What is your why, your deeper motivation? My deep motivation is I want to help people step into their purpose and their identity of who God called them to be. That would be my deepest desire. I just love people. Every person I meet, there is such a beauty and I see it. I want to help them see what I see. so that they can be who God created them to be. Thank you. Another targeted towards youth. You have due to that imposter doubts. are really just, you said that they are really just distractions because God has already called and equipped equipped us. How do you help an aspiring leader especially to internalize that truth and step forward with bold confidence in their calling, especially when they still feel like a fraud inside. Yeah, the. The biggest thing is we begin to realize is just because I feel something doesn't make it so. And feelings are actually an indicator of what I really believe. And when I can step out of the emotion and look at it more, just step back from it a little bit and say, okay, I'm feeling angry. What am I believing right now? I'm feeling scared. What am I believing right now? Because when we can get to the core of what we're believing, let me take the example I used to myself of being seen. I fought internally doing videos for the longest time. Now I've been doing coaching and mentoring a long time. This is pre-internet guys, so I've been doing this a long time. So when YouTube began to be so big, everybody's like, Donnie, you gotta start doing videos. I'm like, no, I'll just do my podcast and audio. I don't wanna do a video. And I really had a hard time with it and I didn't know why. And so I spent some time with my coach on what does being visible mean to me and why was it a hard time? And so just because I had fear about it didn't mean it was true anymore. And didn't mean it was, and I have my videos improved from my very first ones to today, of course. We get better and we learn and we grow, but learning to be able to identify just because I feel this Hmm. doesn't mean it's true. And somehow that we have the idea that the successful people are never, never a little bit hesitant or never a little bit timid before they go on stage, if you will. And that's not the case. Anyone who's continuing to grow and do a little bit more, there's always that unknown that feels like a little bit of a risk. And so instead of saying, I need to get to the place where I don't feel that, it's learning that that's exciting. And that means I'm accomplishing something. I'm growing, I'm pursuing, I'm bettering me. Instead of trying to get rid of the fear, change it instead to excitement that something new is happening. That's good. Thank you. How do you personally combine your leadership role a healthy balanced life as a human being? I mean, you mentioned it a little bit already, but what would you say are your biggest challenge and your success factors in combining life and leadership? facing challenges today. So I was pausing, trying to remember challenges exactly the way. And overworking was one of my biggest ones. It was working all the time because again, the performance identity mindset and trying to, it's all up to me. and I've got to do it. And if I don't get it done, the fallout will be, you know, all of that. It's picturing it going wrong. even while I'm working feverishly to try to make sure it doesn't go wrong. And so do you see how that's at war with each other on the inside? I'm working all of these hours and all of this stuff to try to make sure everything goes right, but I'm really afraid that everything is gonna go wrong. And so there's this war on the inside. And that was one of the biggest things that shifted is I've learned to step into, generally say I teach people where the easy button is. It doesn't have to be hard and it's learning how.

I'll say this question, finish this sentence: 29:46

Life is... Hmm. and mine was hard. That was the first thing that came out of my mouth is life is hard. But I've discovered it doesn't have to be. Now if you think about my beginnings, life was hard. And I wanted to carry that on when it wasn't necessarily what I needed to do. So. The biggest thing to avoid burnout is again, rest and taking care of yourself. Your morning routine is super important to continue that phrase. And the other thing is identifying your emotions and actually looking at them with clarity. And a coach really helps with this because I've got them too. I'm not... I need them too in my life. And so learning to be able to look at emotions not as facts necessarily or truths I mean there's a difference between truth and fact but it is what it is right now but that doesn't mean it's actually who I am. Good, that's true. Feelings can really, you know, can make us, know, can trick us, absolutely. Mm-hmm. And what would you say is one practical step or spiritual habit that you can encourage young professionals to try, maybe this week, if they're feeling overwhelmed or unsure where to start? Quiet time is one of the biggest ones. We have trouble sitting still. I'm talking about sitting still without your phone, without your device, maybe sitting in nature journaling. It's that and really finding out what are you feeling and thinking right now. Because most of the time we don't take time. Are you truly comfortable with you and learning who you are? And that only comes from stillness. My stillness always incorporates God, but even no matter what, if you sit still and journal and think about your dreams, your fears, all of that will change the way that you move through your day. What happens when a leader truly steps into divine alignment? What does that transformation look like leadership and legacy? I don't know that we ever arrive completely on that journey, but it is learning to It's a life of joy and ease and grace and if things in my life today if friction arises That's one way to look at it for me is when friction arises it usually shows up in a relationship or the way I'm reacting to people is I'm pausing going, okay, Donna, what's going on? Where did you lose your grace and peace? What were you thinking? What's going on? And again, that stillness. And so it's asking those kinds of questions to be able to step back into grace. One of my favorite books is called "The Big Leap" by Gay Hendrix and it came up in my journaling this morning, the question was, How much goodness is too much goodness in your life? Because we will self-sabotage if we have reached the place where we go, 'I don't deserve this or it's not...' So I constantly do things on purpose to expand. If I'm feeling good, I push into that on how much better I can even feel. And I often say, only do things that create a smile. Your thoughts should make you smile. Mm-hmm. Your thoughts and your actions and your relationships do things that create a smile and push into smiling more. We walk around so serious and so intense. I'm guilty. I have been guilty of this as well. And so what makes you smile? Think thoughts that create smiles. That's advice. If someone listening today feels stuck or maybe in a false identity or in a season of burnout or striving, what would you say to encourage them? Schedule a call with me. Ha ha ha. Because each and every person on what they're doing, I've addressed some of that and what some of the things that they could do themselves, but find someone to help you through it because burnout should not be a lifestyle. Thank you. Is there something that you would like to bring up that we have missed in the conversation so far? Just know that you are loved more than you can ever imagine and that God's plans for you are good. And you may have had a disappointment and pain in your life, but it's not the end of the story. So if your life is a book, what kind of book do you want it to be? Do you want it to be a sad story or do you want it to be one of those overcoming stories? What kind of story do you want to write? So it's time for a new chapter, perhaps. Let's turn the page and what will be the title of this chapter? Because you're the author of your story. And so beginning to learn that and step into that. Thank you. Thank you so much. listeners want to connect with you, Donna, and learn more about your coaching, books, and podcast, where can they go? The best place is my website and that is the letter I, vibrantliving.com. eh Do have any final encouragement for someone our listeners? Maybe a quote or something that you want to send with them? Get up every day and proceed as if success is inevitable. Okay, great. Okay, thank you. Thank you you for this conversation, Donna. It's been a joy to listen to you and learn from you. So um thank you very much. Okay, listeners and viewers, thank you for being with us today. And this is the Life & Leadership Connected Podcast. Thank you for listening and welcome back when we release our next podcast. And until then, bye bye.