The Other Half Podcast
The other half can be many things. Most of all it is your perspective, your narrative, your side of the story. We are here to hear the other half of the story.
The Other Half Podcast
Father's Day, Dreams, Destinations, and Finding Your Path in Arizona
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Sometimes the most powerful conversations happen when family comes together. In this special Father's Day episode, we welcome Guy – Tino's "little lying brother" – who recently made the bold move from Iowa to Arizona to pursue his barbering dreams. His fresh perspective as a newcomer to the desert provides the perfect backdrop for our exploration of life's big questions.
"Are you living the life you always dreamed of?" This deceptively simple icebreaker reveals striking differences in how each of us measures fulfillment. Guy, standing at the threshold of adulthood, feels aligned with his path. Erika acknowledges gratitude for family and stability while still hungering for more. Avery finds contentment in his current life while maintaining ambition for financial growth. Their varied responses illuminate how our relationship with success evolves throughout different life stages.
The Father's Day theme prompts heartfelt appreciation for the men who've shaped their lives. Guy's reflection that "having a dad in my life is a flex" strikes a powerful chord, highlighting how something some take for granted represents profound privilege for others. The conversation takes an unexpectedly vulnerable turn when Guy shares his journey with syndactyly – a congenital hand condition requiring multiple childhood surgeries. His matter-of-fact resilience and adaptation as a barber showcase remarkable strength.
We explore how geography shapes aspiration, contrasting the limited horizons of small Midwestern towns with Arizona's visible prosperity and opportunity. Those palm-tree lined streets from movies like "Friday" aren't just aesthetic backdrops – they represent possibility. For transplants from places where "we never saw successful Black people in our neighborhoods," the access to diverse models of achievement becomes transformative.
Join us for this intimate look at family bonds, personal growth, and the courage to chase dreams beyond familiar territory. Whether you're contemplating a major life change or simply appreciating the father figures in your world, this episode reminds us that our definitions of success are always evolving.
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Meeting Guy: The Little Lion Brother
Speaker 1all right, hello out there in tv land. We back with another episode. This is the other half podcast. We got my little big brother. He go by guy manny marvin maxwell jamal malik I don't even know buddy real name for real, but yeah, this is my lion brother. This is my lion little brother man Talk. Okay, he got his own YouTube channel.
Speaker 2He cut hair.
Speaker 1He cutting hair. He about to go to barber school. He just moved to Arizona. He lit yeah On online he the real seven baby, but he's not seven foot. So I just want y'all to know that I'm halfway there. Anyways, let's get into this icebreaker Powered by Hella Awkward, shout out Hella Awkward. Hella Awkward is a black and Asian owned business, and that's really dope.
Speaker 1And it is Father's Day today, just so y'all know yes, so happy father's day to all the fathers, mentors yes, everybody coaches, all that anybody who ever played a role in somebody's life yes, and happy father's day to you well, I appreciate that you're welcome.
Living Your Dream Life Icebreaker
Speaker 4I appreciate that. Appreciate that you're welcome. I appreciate that. So it's an icebreaker, all right. So the icebreaker of today is are you living the life that you always dreamed of?
Speaker 1now we're gonna let you go first, sir, since you're the guest well, first, all right, since you're new here.
Speaker 3Uh, he gotta clear his throat too look, I'll say I'll say yeah, like at this, at this, at this age, like at this moment of time, yeah, but like uh, but yeah, like at this age, I'll say yeah, but of course when I get older and stuff, like, I have other plans and stuff, but for right now, yeah, like I'm on track. Why do you feel that? Because, like, I've always wanted to move to Arizona, like it's been my plan since eighth grade, my first time coming out here, I wanted to move out here.
Speaker 4Wait. So I have a question then, now that you just said that since eighth grade but so is that because, like you, have friends that are out here that you heard about Arizona, or was it like ever since Avery moved out here and are you? Just always wanted to move to Arizona. In general, yeah my first time visiting.
Speaker 3My first time visiting it was like it was like really nice and stuff and like y'all got everything out here.
Speaker 4Like.
Speaker 3I used to be really big so I was like heavy on food. Y'all got all the food out here. You know you, it's never boring out here.
Speaker 1That boy was big on food, what yeah?
Speaker 4That's why I be trying to tell people there's so much to do. You can't be bored in it. But the problem yeah, everything costs money to do something.
Speaker 1So let me ask you this how much you used to weigh?
Speaker 3300. I was at. I was at 296.
Speaker 4The highest 298. Isn't that like, not abnormal?
Speaker 1But what you is now Two you said 215.
Speaker 2241.
Speaker 1241. You hear that we're making progress out here in these streets. The sun got the skin falling off them sounds like butter in a skillet alright so your turn ma'am okay.
Speaker 4So for me, I feel like, although I'm thankful to have you know, my family, my kids, a husband, my job, my citizenship, like that's the biggest thing. Um, I am thankful for all of that, although I feel like I'm destined for more. So I'm still aspiring for more for my family, for myself to feel really fulfilled, like my cup is full. So, um, I would say I'm about I am a little more than halfway there for me. What about you?
Speaker 1Okay, I think for me I am right where I want to be. Of course we can pay off bills, all that that's going to come, but everything else I think it's pretty good. I think I just got everything I want.
Speaker 4It's so crazy to me, though, because you're so sweet.
Speaker 1I always wanted kids. I always wanted to live somewhere where it doesn't snow.
Speaker 1I always wanted to be able to help other people. I go to work every day. I love my job. I talk to people Everybody's cool. I'm an old head to help other people. I go to work every day. You know I love my job. I talk to people Everybody's cool. I'm an old head in the shop now, so I get to see the young dumb people. I get to see the older people who I can learn from, and then I get to give all the information to everybody else.
Speaker 4Yeah, Well, I'm happy for you.
Speaker 1So yeah, I think I'm where I want to be, but I mean, obviously there's more. We could always improve on finances and stuff like that, but for the most part I mean when I say that.
Speaker 4That's all I mean by like. You've heard me say this already. I just mean, like you ever seen that the saying like you work five days a week.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 4And then you have like two. What is it? They say, you have like 48 hours to yourself.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 4That's not living to me.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 4So I just want to get to the point where I'm working less, you're working less, but we still have the means for things that we want the kids like whatever they need. I mean not like necessity-wise, but they need um. I mean not like necessity wise, but things that they want, you know um, and just like more for them, like I said, more more space, things like that, just to really feel like we're living life. And I think for me it hits harder because I'm older than you. I'm older than you and I feel like I excuse me, grandma, you know I just I.
Speaker 4I don't want to. I only have so many more years to live and I don't want to be like in the same predicament for too long.
Speaker 1Yeah makes sense, see, but I didn't. I never wanted to be that person that was. I see so many people chasing finances, like so many people, and it's like they put that above everything. So I feel like for me, I always went the opposite way. Of course it matters, but to some people it only matters, like I know people who are scared to have kids. I know people who put everything to the side and put work, work, work. You know what I mean, and I think we have somewhat of a decent balance with that right, because I feel like in the future, you'll be able to work less and you'll make more, and that's the goal for me.
Giving Flowers to Father Figures
Speaker 1You know, what I mean To have you be comfortable and not have to work as much as I do and do something you enjoy. That's a good answer, huh, girl, I know Girl. All right, since today is Father's Day, we are going to give flowers to men, important men that are in our lives. Out of our lives not out of our lives, I'm tripping in our lives but just people who deserve flowers. Whoever you feel deserves flowers. It could be our fathers, it could be coaches, it could be mentors, it could be whoever, whoever you know. There's like a lot of guys who step up in other people's lives, so it's important to make sure everybody gets their flowers. So you want to start this off, boy.
Speaker 3Yeah, I'll start it.
Speaker 1It's not you, ladies, first, but I'm going to let you go ahead. I'm going to let you finish.
Speaker 3Erica had the best speech All right, ladies first, then no, go ahead, ladies first, ladies first. Okay, I'll say my pops. Because I'll say my pops. Because I'll say my pops? Because, just because I got to have no reason. But you know, my dad not perfect, he is in my life, I can call him Whenever I want to. That's a flex, that's a flex, a flex, yeah, like I can actually say, my dad is in my life. I feel like that's a flex. That's a flex, mm-hmm, a flex. Yeah, like I can actually say, my dad is in my life. I feel like that's a good thing. There is distance between us, like we don't live in the same city. Now, we don't live in the same state, but when I was back in Iowa we didn't live in the same city still. But, yeah, I do have like I don't know if my other siblings I do have, like my. I don't know if my other siblings like, if they feel the same way or if, if they feel different, but I don't, I really don't know, but I'm, I'm.
Speaker 4I like my pops. I mean, that's all that. Yeah, that's all that matters.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4You may have a different relationship or connection anyways.
Speaker 3Yeah, and I feel like he's um the reason like that. I am how I am today and how are you yeah, in what sense?
Speaker 1yeah, how are you? I know you tall, I'm a man boy.
Speaker 4No, honestly though I will say I really do.
Speaker 4I have to say this go ahead, you know, because I'm gonna get your flowers too I really, really commend you for being at the age that you are and moving away from where your family is. I know you have us and we're family, but still like to move away from all your family, your friends, um, and to come into a whole new state, starting fresh. That's commendable, because there's so many people your age that are just letting it slide, not taking the opportunities and you know, even if they have it, it's just not. You have like the motivation. I feel like that's what it is like. You're motivated. The fact that you get up and you fold your blanket is crazy.
Speaker 4You know, like, yeah, because romeo, okay, no, I'm just saying it really is. I mean, regardless, if you didn't do that at home or whatever. The fact is that, like you have the mindset of like, okay, I am in somebody else's home, it's not just Avery's home, it's Erica's home too. Let me make sure you clean up after yourself. I mean everything. Like I really do appreciate that about you. I really do admire the fact that you're very motivated and that you want to go to barber school, you want to be a barber or whatever it is that you want to do. I just feel like you're going to make it really far if you keep the same mindset that you have now and you stay motivated. That's why I told you, I feel like you're a lot like Avery, in a sense of you like to be busy, you're a go-getter, you don't wait around for you, and I think that that's what's going to make you go really far yeah, I raised him, so yeah but thank you you're welcome.
Speaker 4I just had to let you know what about you, avery?
Speaker 3what about you?
Speaker 1Erica, ladies, first, who is your father that you would like?
Speaker 2to give props to.
Speaker 4I don't have a father, but I said I feel like it's you because I didn't have that growing up and as we've talked about this before. But if you're new coming on the podcast, and y'all know that avery fathered my kids and, um, he raised asia and april at one and two years old. They are now almost. April's gonna be 11 this month and then Asia's 12.
Speaker 4And I would say if I could just give my speech. I think it's the fact that you get up every day happy, you don't complain, you get them ready for school, you get them there on time, you have a routine. Everything that he does for there on time, you have a routine. Everything that he does for the kids is like in a schedule, so that I think it's because, like you, don't want them to be unorganized and have a messed up life and procrastinate and not be successful. So I think that even right now, like you're setting them up for success and I admire that a lot and that's what made me fall in love with you, because I know that you're you. It's like you aspire to be the greatest dad that you could be. So I do want you to know I really do appreciate you, but I feel like this should be an everyday thing, not just a once a year thing. Yeah, I feel like you work really hard, sometimes harder than you need to.
Speaker 1Hold on, man, I need to work hard.
Speaker 4No, but you just got through saying that people focus too much on finances and money, and that's where I feel like people, parents, we have to take a moment and step back and just live in the moment and not. You know, you do work a lot harder than you need to sometimes.
Speaker 1But it don't feel like work.
Speaker 4You provide.
Speaker 1You just have it for her.
Speaker 4Then you gotta figure out why I'm just having a jolly old time. Oh, it don't feel like work, work.
Speaker 1Yeah, it doesn't feel like work.
Speaker 4Well, that's good Okay.
Speaker 1We appreciate your speech. Okay, we appreciate your speech, girl, we appreciate your speech. Let's go See. You got to do better.
Speaker 4I tell you this stuff all the time, though I don't need to say it on camera.
Speaker 1I don't do my speech now.
Speaker 4I tell you this stuff all the time.
Speaker 1Yeah, we done.
Speaker 4No, we're not.
Speaker 3Like subscribe. All right you. What was yours?
Speaker 2All right you.
Speaker 1What was yours? All right, I got to give a shout out to my uncle, tony. Happy Father's Day to him. I feel like he is someone who doesn't always get flowers and he was around a lot. When I was a kid we used to go to his house, and then later in life we used to go to his house and then later in life we used to, uh, go to his house burn cds. But he was always around, he was always available.
Speaker 4he always welcomed us in his home you should say what burn cds mean for the young folks for the young people when you burn a cd not actually burn a cd cd into a c into a computer.
Speaker 1It puts songs on there. You got about 20 songs made, probably less than that. You got a certain amount of time, yeah, and then you take the cd out. You got songs on, you go to your car, put in the cd.
Speaker 4It's like downloading music from your computer.
Speaker 1Come on man, all right, but yeah, we used to go to his house burn cds. Later in life he got me a. He gave me a ride to and from that job. Then, later in life, after that I think, he got me another job. He helped me get a couple jobs and, yeah, he's always been around and he's always looked out for me. He's always kept me in check and he's always, you know, he's just always there. He's never been a bad person in my eyes. He's just. He's just an uncle.
Speaker 1You know, I mean like I got two uncles. Well, I got three uncles, but the uncles I grew up with are my uncle tony and my uncle chris, and and Tony is closer in age to me, so my mom had me at 17, and Tony is not that much older than me, but I always look at him like an older brother rather than older, like an uncle. Right, I look at Chris as an uncle, I look at Tony as an older brother, because I've seen Tony grow up in a way to where a sibling would see your uncle grow up, in a way to where a sibling would see your uncle grow up rather than the other, the other way around. You know what I mean. So, yeah, a little my uncle, my little uncle, my yeah, shout out my uncle Tony.
Speaker 2Okay, so yeah.
Speaker 1But I do remember like going to his house. He lived upstairs in an apartment with, uh, his kid's mom and uh, yeah, I remember going over there as a kid. So shout out, my uncle okay, yeah, cool so what's your? What's your other question?
Speaker 4I know you got it up your sleeve I know I was trying to remember what it was.
Speaker 1It was another question I got you, oh it up your sleeve.
Speaker 4I know, I was trying to remember what it was. It was another question I got you. Oh, it was. So the other question I wanted to do a card for was what you wanted to accomplish by the end of the year.
Speaker 1Yeah, what do you want to accomplish by the end of the year? You out here in Arizona. You know it's wonderful out here, the weather is good. You know it's wonderful out here, the weather's good you can make up something new. I can tell you what you say, yeah, Make up something new, Like just answer.
Speaker 4I mean so you're in Arizona Like what's your plan?
Speaker 1What's your plan for the year? What are you here for? What are you here for?
Speaker 2What do you want to do?
Speaker 1What do you want to do?
Speaker 2All year.
Speaker 3Make some friends.
Speaker 4I ain't got no friends.
Speaker 3I mean, I was all day, every day, bored. You feel me Taking up all the sunlight. I hope I'm graduating from barber school by then, so I could just go right into the barbershop, and then I hope I'm financially happy with myself. Then, yeah, yeah, that's about it that's it okay and everything else will come after that.
Speaker 1I hope.
Speaker 3I hope life is good, like I hope I'm not that you're happy yeah, I hope that I'm happy you wanna be happy, huh.
Speaker 1What makes you happy, huh?
Speaker 3I don't know, I just I just be having like I be having like times like it be random, like different times in my life. I feel like it'd be like once a year like depression be on and off, so like I hope I'm not like in that stage yeah, that's why you got to stay active, for sure, yeah, and it's good thing you say you're comfortable earlier.
Speaker 4Tell me you're comfortable, that's good, that you're not afraid to meet people and stuff and be. That's gonna make you a great barber too, because I know that's how avery is be personable and able to have relationships with people without being afraid, because then you're like me yeah be, you will take your own advice here, because there you go, take that own advice yeah, because I struggle with that, but then I struggle with depression I'm not scared to meet people alone, like introduce myself and stuff like that, oh yeah.
Speaker 1But everybody in arizona's like happy and friendly and all that so it's easy out here, but I when I started I didn't talk to people I didn't know. Yeah, back home.
Speaker 4We in washington we don't do that. If somebody talks to you, you give them a look like yeah, it's weird it's weird that you're trying to talk to me right now.
Speaker 3They have classes in high school, like about that do they?
Speaker 1yeah, you know we ain't been in high school in about 20 years that's good that they did because of mental health, though. That's why it's it's a big thing right now but there's also a lot of kids that don't know how to talk to people yeah like I literally didn't know how to talk to people until I became a barber, and it wasn't until after, like the first year yeah, you didn't even know how to talk to me, excuse me no, really your communication skills has gotten a lot better what I'm just being serious erica, you know, I met you 10 years ago I know, isn't that crazy, but that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 410 years ago you were not how you are now you don't know what I said 10 years ago either. I said no, whatever I'm saying. Like, come on, dog, you didn't know how to like communicate, so I couldn't imagine how you would communicate with. You know people as a barber. So that's definitely what helped you a lot, cause now you hate when people don't communicate with you.
Speaker 1I don't know what you're talking about In the shop.
Speaker 4Like you said, when they text you and then or you text them and they don't respond, and men just don't want to communicate.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's just a naturally a guy's thing to not be good at communicating. You know a lot of guys are prideful and they don't want you to know what's going on, and all that I've been telling my clients straight up. Man, me and my girl got into it today, man, we be in there talking. Man, let me tell you about my brother. Man, that's fine, though, because sometimes you need people to tell you. Yeah, sometimes you need a Exactly Sometimes you need that outside opinion because they don't have any emotions involved.
Speaker 4It's not bias. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1It is bias, because they're my client.
Speaker 4I know I feel like I should have been a therapist. No, I'm just playing.
Speaker 1You should have been a therapist, yeah.
Speaker 2They do make a lot of money.
Speaker 4Yeah, because I feel like what you don't think, I could be a therapist.
Speaker 3You gotta do a sit down talk.
Speaker 4I feel like, like because I get it, though you have to understand. I've been there where, like I grew up at, my mom said I never would talk. I would always be in my room by myself because she never we never had talked as a family, we never communicated, it was always yelling arguing.
Speaker 1How does this make you a good therapist?
Speaker 4because I feel like I, it also involves psychology. I kind of understand why people do what they do. I have empathy for people too and I give people grace. You know, I'm not like, I'm not gonna not give you a chance to figure out what is going on with you, what's wrong. I've done that with you no, you haven't.
Speaker 2Yes, I have okay whatever you just say, I don't communicate with you. That's fine.
Speaker 4Everyone else has no problem with me, just you.
Speaker 1When did you give me grace?
Speaker 2I give you grace, all the time.
Guy's Hand Surgeries and Resilience
Speaker 4But I'm also telling you where you're wrong. But no, it's just like if Guy needed to talk to me about something, I would sit listen. And it's because I have a lot of like wisdom, Like I've been through a lot of things, so I can give ask you something.
Speaker 1Do people ask you about your hands?
Speaker 3Uh, not really Like, not not anymore.
Speaker 1Do you tell people about your hands?
Speaker 3I mean in high school, like early high school freshman year, sophomore year people didn't really know. But yeah, I like explained to them what happened but like nobody's really asked In the past couple years.
Speaker 1So let me ask you this Does it make you Embarrassed or anything? No, I just ask, cause sometimes people ask Like hey, man, what happened to your brother's fingers who I can't tell you. All that? Somebody did ask and I just told him I don't even notice.
Speaker 4Do you know A?
Speaker 1him like I don't even notice. Do you know?
Speaker 3yeah, a lot of people don't notice until like I'd be at school and I like take them up, it's like that.
Speaker 4I'm up like I thought that they don't really be noticing I don't feel like it's something that big of a deal you want to tell the story.
Speaker 3Yeah, I'll tell the story okay, um, I'll tell the story. Okay, um, when I was born, well, first, when my dad was born, he was born with a first. It's called syndactyly. Uh, it's hands and feet, um, it's like your fingers are connected and stuff and like your tendons are messed up in your hands and stuff and it's it and it's it cause you. So, like my hand, like my finger, I can't, I can't straighten it Like it's, it's stuck like this Halfway. And then the little one. I have a little finger, my ring finger, on my right hand, and then this, like my bigger hand, cause like it stretch out A little bit more. So like this hand small and this hand big. So that's something I had to recognize.
Speaker 3And then, but yeah, my dad was born with it. His wasn't as bad, Like he was able to go to the doctor when he was a kid and just get like, just get the little because he had his connection just by a little piece of skin. So he was able to get his fix to normal. But mine was like a little bit more complicated. I had about Seven or eight surgeries Between fourth grade and when I was born, yeah, I had to get surgery Like Soon, as I was born, I had like three surgeries and then, yeah, that's about it.
Speaker 4Yeah, and it doesn't affect how you cut hair or anything.
Speaker 3Nothing, I mean. What's it called when you're doing A little sheer work With it, called when you're doing a little sheer work with you?
Speaker 1know yeah, when you're grabbing the hair.
Speaker 3Yeah, yeah make sure you guideline I got to do it with my ring finger and my pinky.
Speaker 4I just be having to learn like how to do it, ways to go around it, yeah.
Speaker 3Like do it my own way and stuff. But I think I was in sixth grade one time I was cool with him. He thought I was faking and he had grabbed my finger and like pulled it back. I about beat the brakes on him.
Speaker 1Nah, when I was younger, I used to. When you was a kid, I used to think like dang man, I'm terrified for you to go to school, because I used to think somebody step on it and then it open up all the way.
Speaker 3Well, if somebody step on it, like it probably like go to the side, it probably might, it might. I mean I've never had that happen, yeah.
Speaker 1No, I used to. I used to be terrified of that, because you know kids in school, they don't be watching where they're going. Yeah, They'll step on your finger, you on the floor with your hands out.
Speaker 3Yeah, they'll step on your hands for sure that has happened before and when I was living in Iowa City it was reading time on the carpet, they went to their desk and stepped right on my hand Dang.
Speaker 1Yeah, but yeah no, Crazy.
Speaker 2That's rough Dang.
Speaker 3That's rough, dang, that's rough. But another story is like my last one. I had pins in my hand, like going from like the top of my finger. It was like down the middle of my bone all the way to my joint to keep my fingers stiff so it can grow the right way. But I was playing with my cousin J Leah and see, I hit me with a pillow and I put my hand up to reflect the pillow and it hit my hand and it like bent it a little bit. I went in the bathroom where I would look like Curly Fries from Arby's.
Speaker 1I was like why you gotta go into details like that it was disgusting, and then another time um. I gotta put an advisory on this episode. Boy, that's crazy.
Speaker 3No, when I was, like when it first happened, like like a week after, like I got out of surgery, I had my cast on and when I was outside playing and some girl did a cartwheel and her leg came up and hit the top of the cast and like they had left the cast open a little bit so my hands can get some air and hit the top of the cast and it hurt so bad. I didn't know what was wrong with it but like I went back in the house crying like 45 minutes. Blood was just running out of the cast. My god, it was so disgusting.
Speaker 2My mom wasn't there, nothing I had to.
Speaker 3Just I didn't know what to do that's crazy.
Speaker 1That's crazy have you ever had any surgeries?
Speaker 4Any major surgeries no. Or broke a bone no.
Speaker 1You never broken a bone.
Speaker 4Have I had any surgery?
Speaker 1You wasn't outside enough. No, no I really don't.
Speaker 3Hey, tell them about the elbow. You thought you was Superman. Hold on, man, what?
Speaker 1You wasn't even he trying to tell stories, he wasn't even born for what Story about elbow?
Speaker 2I broke my arm.
Speaker 1I just broke my arm, that's it.
Speaker 4I didn't know you broke your arm, I just know the story about when Mike jumped on you and that hurt your back.
Speaker 1That's why your tailbone's like that's a different story. I ain't never heard that one. My spine is crooked. You got what mom got when I stand, that's why he walks a certain way. No, when I stand, one of my shoulders is lower. When I work out and stuff, Because Mike jumped on my. I was sitting up on the bed, right.
Speaker 2This boy jumped on my shoulders, put his legs around here and here and just jumped and I was like, oh, I don't know if my spine went down like this, but it hurt so bad I couldn't move. Hey, he was terrible so the elbow story.
Speaker 1This is the elbow story. Go ahead. I was a kid, right, we was playing around. It was me, mike, and somebody else's kid, I don't remember who, but he was a baby. I jumped off this bike. He throws his bottle where I'm jumping, bam laying right on it. Boy, I was knocked out, but at least that's what I was told.
Speaker 3Woke up in the cast Did you feel it Woke up in the cast.
Speaker 2I don't know.
Speaker 1I just woke up in the cast. That's how it be man.
Speaker 3That's how it be. That's crazy.
Speaker 1See you, that's how I be. Yeah, that's all right. That's crazy. See you never had like a third degree burn or nothing.
Speaker 4No, it must be nice. Oh, actually. No, I know I have like a. I used to have a burn from when I touched. No, just like an oven burn, normal burn I've never had anything crazy happen to me. I've never broken a bone, never had a a surgery.
Speaker 1Hey, Erica takes.
Speaker 4No, I just don't really do activities.
Speaker 1Erica takes pans out the oven with her bare hands. What Thank you. I know I'm not tripping.
Speaker 3Hey, you got to have at least five kids to do that.
Speaker 4Hey, yeah, no.
Speaker 1Crazy boy.
Speaker 4No, I really I haven't had anything crazy like that happen to me. The most I've had is me passing out. That's it, nothing else. Can't think of anything else.
Speaker 1Damn.
Speaker 2So how does?
Speaker 1it feel to live in Iowa now, I mean not Iowa, arizona, arizona. It's hot out here right now. You moved in the summer.
Speaker 3I ain't gonna lie, I really don't mind the heat. Like it's not that bad to me.
Speaker 1It's not that bad to me, but it's supposed to get worse, right yeah? Like 120? Yeah, it's supposed to get 120.
Speaker 3It gets up there.
Speaker 1But anything from one T and a 120 feel the same.
Speaker 3Okay, it's just hot. I mean, I really don't mind it.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 2I'll go play basketball right now.
Speaker 1No, you tripping.
Speaker 3You're going to die out there, boy, I really don't mind it. You're going to get heat stroke. I mean I just moved out here. Well, it's been like a whole week now. Yep, it's been one whole week Boring so far. But I love the scenery of uh arizona. You know palm trees love it, never get tired of it yeah facts.
Speaker 4Yeah, hopefully it'll be better a lot of places to shop, a lot of places to eat, I mean, but I ain't never got nothing to do yeah yeah, but that's gonna change six years yeah
Speaker 1so it don't really get old to me. I don't know about you.
Speaker 4Well, because we don't get to like, experience all that, yet we don't really be out like that.
Speaker 1Yeah, but I All we do is Topgolf.
Speaker 4Yeah, but that's cool, Because I mean, they're building so much stuff closer, but I feel like we've done everything close. We haven't done stuff this far. We haven, or even all of Chandler.
Speaker 1Arizona. Big man, I know it's going to take a long time.
Speaker 3You want to go in the mountains? I've never been in the mountains before.
Speaker 4We should have taken more. We went with Chris. Yeah, we don't hike.
Speaker 1We just drive to the top.
Speaker 2Yeah, I'm serious. No, people die that drive crazy though that drive is crazy.
Speaker 1Yes.
Speaker 4They were scared.
Speaker 3He was flying, wasn't he? No, I was like this.
Moving to Arizona: Expectations vs Reality
Speaker 4Because Chris was like Holding on to the steering wheel while I was getting, because there's no railing for like the roads when you're turning, so all you all is it's down from there and you're going thousands of feet up. And I remember him going like a little bit over the speed limit on these winding roads and Chris being like hey, hey, you can slow down right here. And you were still going.
Speaker 2You're, you can slow down right here and you were still going. You're gonna snitch. It was scary, but but it's cool because you can see the whole city.
Speaker 4I mean all the cities. You can see all the cities, so it's cool yeah, I've still haven't learned like I'm gonna.
Speaker 3I'm gonna explore Phoenix, yeah.
Speaker 1Phoenix is, phoenix is Phoenix.
Speaker 3Yeah, I don't you say it dirty, but like that can't be like.
Speaker 4The whole Phoenix. No, it's different areas.
Speaker 1It's different areas. Yeah, every city has a dirty area. It's different from the East Valley.
Speaker 4Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1I think the East Valley Is more for me. Some people are like oh, it ain't enough Black people out here. It ain't enough. This, it ain't enough that I see black people all the time it's a little bit everything out here.
Speaker 4It's a variety also. I just feel like it's cleaner here. It is more like scottsdale in a way yeah whereas phoenix is more. Not.
Speaker 1That's the only difference um but I I also feel like, when people say there's not enough black people they're looking for, like they're from somewhere where its majority is black people, because I mean, we literally have everything around here hispanic asians you just saw last night everything, yeah like so yeah last night we went to juneteenth block party there's a lot of black people out there, so and it's just growing more and more shout out my boy jazz, he he black now. Yeah, he's down.
Speaker 4No, but I mean and all of that will change too, Once you have a car and you're able to get around on your own. You don't have to depend on us and wait around on us, and then you meet your friends that have cars. You know what I mean. You have your own money to go spend on whatever you want to go do and experience life. It's going to be good. I you want to go do and experience life, it's going to be good.
Speaker 3I want to try Dave's hot chicken, but he act like he don't want to take me.
Speaker 1I tried it already. You tried it, I ain't had it. I'm going to say this Dave's hot chicken is not good. No, okay, I'm going to take that back.
Speaker 4That's your opinion.
Speaker 1Dave's hot chicken is more hot than flavor, if that makes sense.
Speaker 4It's more hot than flavor, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1It's spicy, it's not. Yes, the flavor's not there to me. Okay, I mean it's cool, but it's just not the flavor's not there to me. I don't know. It's me to me. You got to try it for yourself. People crazy about it, but I don't know.
Speaker 2Have, we had that. We've had it together.
Speaker 1No, I had it in Vegas.
Speaker 4Oh okay.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's Vegas. I went to Vegas. What you mean they?
Speaker 3was not chicken. They was not chicken.
Speaker 1That's like saying oh, In-N-Out good, but that's Vegas In-N-Out good, or it ain't.
Speaker 3No no.
Speaker 1It's not the same.
Speaker 3No In-N-Out was fire, but it ain't all that like you were saying it was. It's still fire, though I didn't say anything that was on it Uh well like but people hype it up that way.
Speaker 4Yeah, the burgers are good, but the fries are not that good. Yeah, like regular fries.
Speaker 3That's a good burger, mm-hmm. Yeah, I got a question. Okay, you got 10 seconds Question when did you see yourself when you were like 10 years old, Like growing up? Where did you see yourself Like Did you see yourself here or I didn't.
Speaker 1I would not be in Arizona If I didn't meet Erica. She dragged me out here by my hands and feet and beat me with wet knees.
Speaker 4I had to convince. You know it was me and Levante that convinced him, cause we came out To visit the kids, cause you know my what.
Speaker 1You think, levante, you're wrong.
Speaker 4Oh, I don't know, I just remember the conversation.
Speaker 1No we came out here To visit, cause I never met the kids. So we came out To see them and I was like, oh, these look nice Out here. We flew into Vegas and then we drove here.
Speaker 3Dang why y'all ain't just fly here. It's only four hours. It was cheaper. It was cheaper to fly to Vegas. Yeah, it's just a four-hour drive.
Speaker 1We got a rental and drove here. We're going to have a rental either way, okay. But yeah, we probably should have just flew in here, yeah. But when we first got here I was like, oh, this cool, it's nice out here. They're not seeing the head of Ganya's grill, so you want to move it's not but look, and then we went to Tucson. Now it's like, oh, I can't live here. Well, tucson is.
Speaker 4I used to live in. Tucson. That's where the kids live.
Speaker 1And it looks different. Tucson is what I expected Phoenix to look like, because they say, oh, it's the desert, it's the desert, but they don't realize, like it's a city here. You know what I'm saying. Out there it's a city, but it's.
Speaker 4It's more desert it's a city than there is desert yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4And it's and everybody that that live there or lives there Knows it's changed a lot.
Speaker 1I was out there looking at cactuses. It wasn't even palm, it was palm trees, but it was cactuses.
Speaker 3Heavy. I've never seen like a tall cactus, like a human-sized cactus. They got it out there for sure.
Speaker 4I mean, I just feel like because Arizona is so close to California, we have more of like what California looks like compared to I agree. Yeah, so it's like pretty much the same literally Facts, Except for we don't have LA. It's the same thing. But yeah, I used to live in Tucson years ago and I always said I was going to always move back to Arizona because my oldest kids were here.
Speaker 1And I asked her what's one place you would want to live that you'd never want to move from? Because you look at Washington like we look at iowa, like it's not for me, I don't want to be there. Yeah, um, so she said arizona and I said let's go visit. What do you?
Speaker 4know that was because, remember, we moved to iowa yeah no, I was tired of moving.
Speaker 4No, I'm trying to say the story we moved to iowa, remember from washington, tried that out, we're there for six months. That was a no for us. We even moved to where we were. We moved to Iowa, remember from Washington, tried that out, we're there for six months. That was a no for us. We even moved to where we were going to move to Des Moines. We were in Cedar Rapids. We said, okay, where else could we live? You asked me that would make you happy than to be here or back home, and I said Arizona. That's where my kids are.
Speaker 3Well, where else were y'all thinking that's it.
Speaker 4Just moving back to Washington.
Speaker 1No, we did move back to Washington. This is when we moved back to Washington.
Speaker 3Okay, so, yeah, what about you, erica? Where did you see yourself growing up?
Speaker 4Arizona, arizona. Well, yes, arizona because of the kids. But I always wanted to live in California. I've always been like California is where I want to live because of the palm trees, the vibe, everything. And then now I hear California is not at all what it used to be. Now it's like you're better off being in Northern California than Southern California, like even LA. It's not what it used to be at all.
Where We Thought We'd End Up
Speaker 4I whack so many people that have moved from LA and basically it's like people are shooting up drugs on the street. There's feces on the street, it's just, it's not good it is not what they show. It's not what it yeah that was the only reason why I ever wanted to move there. I wanted to live in la I saw myself as a la girl.
Speaker 1That's crazy I never wanted to. I never saw myself outside of iowa because we never like when I was a kid. We never saw myself outside of Iowa because we never like when I was a kid, we never saw nothing outside of Iowa unless you were watching TV, yeah, fair.
Speaker 1So I never seen myself outside of Iowa and we didn't really travel as a kid. We didn't go nowhere. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, the first time I got on an airplane we went to Hungary, we went to Europe and that's where we lived and that was it Okay. My whole time as a kid I was like I want to be a dad, I want to be married, I want to have a good household, this, that and the other, but I didn't know where, so I didn't know. I was going to be in Arizona. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1I didn't know I was ever going to move out of Iowa, I think you thought you would be have stayed in Washington, but I do think that leaving Iowa was what's best for me. I feel like you can only do so much in Iowa. But it was also a I don't want to move somewhere where I don't know anyone, because then it's like I don't want to move to a bad neighborhood. I don't want to be caught up with the wrong people. So I was always afraid of moving out of Iowa.
Speaker 3Yeah, so you've seen yourself in Iowa the whole time.
Speaker 1Yeah, because all our family was there. Yeah, I didn't know nobody in Tennessee. We had family in Tennessee. I didn't know any of them. And then my brother was the only person I knew that lived outside of Iowa. So I went to visit him. I was never thinking, oh, I'm going to move here one day. I was just like, let me go visit him and see how he doing out there, just to go visit. I was never like, oh, one day I'm going to move over here with my brother.
Speaker 3Is it like Iowa out there?
Speaker 1It's different, it's getting worse though. It's different. I don't think it's like Iowa. I think there's a lot of Hispanics out there.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1And one thing I learned about Washington was like ownership, because Hispanics believe in ownership. You learn from other cultures but they're very, very family oriented, which I feel like In our, in our family. We're family oriented to an extent. You know what I mean. They're family oriented to where it's like you grow up as an adult, you stay in the household but you take this one bill. Yeah, mom got one bill, dad got one bill, brother got one bill, uncle got one bill and they just they look out for one another like that.
Speaker 1But there's also no like. I feel like with black households we have a lot more issues. We have a lot more things that we worry about and we don't always think about each other, but there are also and we don't always think about each other, but there's also like we just lost the family aspect. We don't have men in households anymore. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, so that's the biggest difference that I learned out there in Washington yeah, and the Latino family.
Speaker 4I learned how to cut hair.
Speaker 1I learned all that, yeah. So it was cool, but it was different. Where did you see yourself?
Speaker 3You know, kind of like what you said in Iowa I didn't know nothing outside of Iowa except for watching TV. So one day I had seen, I was thinking about like where I want to move, because I know. I ain't want to stay in Iowa and so I had seen. I was like watching a whole bunch of movies I seen Friday. You know it's good Like showing how the West Coast looks and stuff. Yes, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, that's nice.
Speaker 2I know that's nice.
Speaker 3The palm trees and stuff, and then I don't know what movie it was, but it's kind of like all American you know and the street they live on. It's like the palm trees going all the way down the street.
Speaker 4Yeah, that's what you see when you're driving on the 10. It looks so nice.
Speaker 3And then you remember the post you had shared on Instagram with the old school LA music. And then it's like blue skies, like just straight sun and blue skies, yeah.
Speaker 2All that. Yeah, I feel like it makes you happy, yeah that's what you say.
Speaker 4You said it makes you want to make money palm trees, yeah, that's what well also because, like we've said before, even out here, it's like it is a lot like california in the sense where, because you have so many californians living here, yeah that it's even more so like that, where people here like, even now, me being a waxer, oh my god, people have like money because they just they believe in having businesses.
Speaker 4They believe in like doing something. You got to do something, whether you are your entrepreneur, you went to school, whatever it is, but I feel like that's what drives you to want more, because you see, people around you that are always trying to. They're always motivated and doing more.
Speaker 1You know but see for I, for us in iowa, it was more of a. It's almost like you're in a box and you're always looking out watching tv was us looking out? Because we had commercials of restaurants we didn't even have yeah you know what I mean.
Speaker 1We had golden corral commercials, we had all these different commercials. We never had any of it. So it's like, oh, that's what's going on in the world, that's cool, but that don't happen here and we'll probably never be able to go there. You know what I mean. So now it's like we didn't see no successful black people in our neighborhoods. We didn't see successful people at all for real. Real. They look like us.
Speaker 4You always talk about the cars.
Speaker 1We never seen nothing.
Speaker 4You always say that people just have old cars.
Speaker 1Oh yeah, absolutely, or the houses are all not the houses are all older here, it's more modern. Like we never seen stuff like this in person. We seen it on TV, even back home.
Speaker 4Like back home we don't see the cars that we see, like the McLarens and Maseratis and all of this stuff.
Speaker 2Yeah, we've been behind them. You've not seen a McLaren out here.
Speaker 4Yeah, they come from Scottsdale.
Speaker 1No, I got a client. Yeah, you'll see them.
Speaker 4There's the Alfa Romeros, the Maseratis, the McLarens, the Lamborghinis, the Porsche, even just a a lot of Mercedes, bmws, like that's all you see driving around.
Speaker 3Those are like normal cars out here though yeah, but also you see brand new cars getting drove off the lot right.
Speaker 4Yeah.
Speaker 1We don't see that at all.
Speaker 4No.
Speaker 1It's always hey, who got a $1500 car for sale? And it's like we ain't really got money like that in Iowa. It's not money like that in Iowa, and there are places like that in Iowa. It's not money like that in Iowa. There are places like that. You know what? I'm saying Smaller cities we don't have access to a lot of these things. You can drive down the highway and you can go to an Ashton Martin dealership. It's just access that you have out here.
Speaker 4It's access yeah.
Speaker 1But everyone has something going on a side, hustle whatever to where they are here getting to it.
Speaker 4I feel like there's a lot of opportunity to be successful. That's why I love it.
Speaker 2Facts, facts.
Speaker 1So, yeah, that's about it for this episode. Okay.
Speaker 4All right. Yeah, but anyways, yes, happy.
Speaker 3Father's. Day to you what time is?
Speaker 1it, don't worry about it, sweetheart. About time we finna grill.
Speaker 3I'm finna grill.
Speaker 2I have to help you. I'm finna grill.
Speaker 1I can't cook. That's crazy. Anyways like subscribe. If you on Apple Music, you know what I'm saying. Subscribe or, however they do it, follow us Spotify as well, all that, but yeah, we'll be all our social medias. Follow guys youtube yo boy man, he got his youtube channel, he do vlogs y-o-b-o-a-n-n-y tell him to start vlogging what he doing in school so we can see if they let me, if they allow me, they better.
Speaker 2Cause this ain't high school Facts.
Speaker 1Alright, we'll catch y'all.
Speaker 4In the next one, peace.