Midwife Or OB? What You Need To Know

Midwife or OB? Most parents don’t realize they’re choosing more than a title, they’re choosing a care model. We’re Misty and Tammy, two doulas who spend a lot of time in hospital birth rooms, and we keep getting the same question: what’s the real difference between hospital-based midwives and obstetricians during pregnancy and labor, and how do you know which one is right for you? We walk through it with nuance, because we’ve worked with amazing providers on both sides. 

We talk about what changes in prenatal visits, including time, education, and how thoroughly options get explained. We unpack how CNMs are trained, why bedside communication can feel different, and how labor support often shifts depending on whether the mindset is “manage labor” or “let labor unfold.” You’ll also hear our on-the-ground perspective on inductions, epidurals, pushing positions, and intermittent versus continuous monitoring, plus why personality fit matters so much when you’re at your most vulnerable. 

Then we get practical with a list of questions to bring to any provider: how they feel about inductions and their cutoff dates, what they do when labor stalls, what their C-section rate means in context, who will actually deliver your baby, and how they work with doulas. The biggest takeaway: there’s no single right answer, but you do deserve to feel safe, respected, and informed and you can change your mind if you don’t. Subscribe, share this with a newly pregnant friend, and leave a review with the question you wish you’d asked sooner.

Thanks for listening!  Always feel free to message us for more information or, if you have information you feel we should see, please send that. We LOVE to hear and learn from you!

Transcript

Welcome And Quick Disclaimer

Speaker 2 0:03

I'm Misty, and I'm Tammy. And we're the doulas on call. Remember, mamas, we're not doctors, midwives, or magical birth wizards, I wish. Just two passionate birth workers with microphones, sharing personal experiences, trusted information, the best snacks for labor, and a whole lot of heart. What you hear on this podcast is meant to educate, encourage, and connect, but it's not medical advice.

Speaker 0:34

Please consult your trusted healthcare provider when making decisions about your health, your birth, or anything clinical. Basically, don't sue us. We're just here to talk birth, spill some tea, and share the love.

Speaker 2 0:55

Ring ring, doula's on call. Hello, friends, and welcome back. Hello. Hi, Misty. Hi, Tammy.

Midwives Vs OBs In Hospitals

Speaker 2 1:09

Uh, so today we're gonna talk about something that we get asked a lot as doula.

Speaker 1:16

Oh my gosh, all the time. Uh midwives versus OB during pregnancy. OB care. Yeah. Who's your provider? What are you doing with? Yeah.

Speaker 2 1:26

Yeah. So what who should I have? What should I do? What's the difference? Um, and we should say right now, like we are going to talk specifically about hospital-based midwives. So different. Yeah. So today, just hospital-based, not home birth um midwives or birth center midwives.

Speaker 1:45

Yeah, I think I think a lot of people immediately picture out of the hospital birth when they hear the word midwife. And actually, some people get us confused with midwives, just saying. Um but so many midwives work directly inside the hospital system alongside OBs. So we just want to clarify before we get into the weeds of it. Yeah.

Speaker 2 2:05

Yeah, and we definitely aren't saying that, you know, one is better than the other. Um, because we've worked with a lot of amazing OBs and a lot of amazing midwives. So this is really to just kind of dig into, you know, what are the differences?

Speaker 3 2:20

Totally.

Speaker 2 2:21

And, you know, what might make sense for you based on your pregnancy and your desires.

Speaker 2:27

Yeah, and I think um it's more about yeah, definitely helping you understand like what is a difference in their care model and and like you said, figuring out what's best for you. And also right now, I don't know about you, Misty, but I also have clients who are in a practice where there's both. Yeah. So there's there's, you know, an OB and a midwife, and that I I think that's kind of genius in that. That collaborative type care. I actually like that. So I agree. Cool, cool. I agree.

Speaker 2 2:56

So um who did you

Their Personal Provider Stories

Speaker 2 3:01

what did you have for your pregnancies, Tammy? You had two um two babies. Yeah. Um, did you go with midwife?

Speaker 3:08

Did you go with OB? So um, given so our kids are 22 and 19. I actually went with an OB because it was an OB that my family had used. And at that time it was just transitioning to a different model, right? So um, I don't know if you heard, if you listened to our last episode with Grandma Linda, uh, you know, that was part of we used to have one OB, and my OB was Dr. Gore, and I saw Dr. Gore every single appointment. I think that is so cool. With Ian's, with especially with Ian's ma Macy was different, but for Ian, I chose Dr. Gore. He had helped my cousins, he had helped other friends, and to be honest, knowing what I've learned a lot and especially given my aunt, like my huge family uh experience and seeing births with my aunts and whatnot. Um, I don't even know I was very educated, but I don't know that I really knew the difference. And um even though I had witnessed a home birth. So it's it's interesting knowing now what I yeah, because now I would have Are we gonna get to that? We'll get to that would be. Yeah, and and I loved having Dr. Gore, like I said, because I saw him every single um appointment. So what about you with your first, especially?

Speaker 2 4:30

I actually had midwives for all three of mine. I love it. I stayed with the same midwife practice, and they were the collaborative type care. So they were um uh in a group where it was one side was the OBs, one side was the midwives. I think there were like five midwives at the time.

Speaker 3 4:47

Okay.

Speaker 2 4:48

Um it was awesome. Um I had known somebody that had a baby with these midwives, and that's kind of how I found her. I got pregnant at so young, I was you know, 17. That's right. Yeah. Um, I did not know back then how much having a midwife in my situation was so helpful for what I was going through.

Speaker 3 5:13

Yeah.

Speaker 2 5:13

Um, I never once felt judged for being young. I always like had that compassionate type care um care.

Speaker 5:21

Yeah. Not fearful, not fear-based.

Speaker 2 5:23

No. Yeah. No, I I in I, you know, similar to you, like I had been around birth at such a young age. So like I honestly like I didn't have any fear about birth. I'll tell you funny.

Speaker 5:35

I I didn't either. Yeah. I didn't walk into my birth, I was so excited to have a baby. I think it really freaked out my friends too. Okay. That had had kids. That you weren't scared. Yeah, that I wasn't scared as a first-time mom.

Speaker 2 5:48

Yeah, I I didn't really, I didn't have any fear, and it was so funny because I'll never forget the moment though, like when he, you know, they told me to push and like he was about ready to be born.

Speaker 3 6:00

Yeah.

Speaker 2 6:01

And I went, oh crap, there's like actually a baby in there.

Speaker 1 6:08

Like a human. Oh no. Like I remember how real it felt that moment. So that was the only like I would say, like, moment of fear or shock in there, if you will.

Speaker 2 6:17

But um, yeah. I loved it. I always felt so super um supported and it was yeah.

Speaker 6:24

Was there was there any part of her you the midwifery model that you didn't like or that? Not at all. Yeah.

Speaker 2 6:30

I felt in and again, I think because I had that like collaborative type care. True. Like I did have in one of my pregnancies, my third pregnancy, I did have uh medical concern kind of come up where we used the OBs for, you know, I had an amniocentesis. Right. So we used the OBs for that, and it was really done in such a way that it was like more of like a partnership like collaboration. So there was like it was seamless. Like it felt it felt really good.

Speaker 7:01

So I really like it. I think I think the only thing I, you know, no, knowing what I know now, I could say what I wish I would have had uh because I had OB care is the more personable letting my body decide what to do. And with my first birth, it would have made all the difference. Yeah. Actually, because my birth started with prom like my water's birthday with my first. So like having a little bit more trust in that physiological and talking about the difference in care, so overall, like in the feeling of having uh uh doula and the difference of having like an OB or a midwife, yeah.

Appointment Style And Education Differences

Speaker 2 7:51

Well, so I would say for me, like as a patient and then also as a doula, yeah, um, one of the biggest things that I notice is the appointments. So usually they're longer with midwives. So um you know, with OBs, they can tend to be a little bit more, you know, faster paced, but um I would say that's um they're definitely longer.

Speaker 8:17

I think that they talk. They're not just in and out. Uh they more they're definitely midwives, excuse me, midwives are definitely more focused on educating my client. Yeah. They really want to help them understand. They're much better at talking through the options. Like even in the birth space. Would you agree? I mean, I think I think OBs do it, but it's definitely, I mean, that and that all pertails to like bedside manner, um, and uh personality. Correct. But I think just the midwifery model and how they are trained is definitely like you said, they trust you more and they really get into the depth of, hey, do you understand what we're saying? Do you know what your options are? And do you have any questions?

Speaker 2 9:04

And you know what I because I've thought a lot about it too. And I'm like, you know, why is that such a difference there?

Speaker 9:10

Yeah.

Speaker 2 9:11

And if you look at, you know, midwives, like midwives that work in a hospital, they have to be CNMs. So they're certified nurse midwives. That means they started as a nurse.

Speaker 3 9:19

Yeah.

Speaker 2 9:20

Well, look at your nurses that help you, they help you bedside. That's right. You know, doctors are not always bedside with you. No, that's true.

Speaker 9:28

So I feel like they have a bit more already of that um, you know, person of a word or uh care focused because they've been nursing. That's true. Um although I will say, and I'll play devil's advocate in this, I do have clients that are um that prefer the OB. They love the medical-based, uh, you know, not that not that mid-wives aren't medical-based, but it you know what I'm trying to say. It's like they're just they like the more efficiency. They don't want they don't like the chit-chat, they're just like, I'm cool with it. Like, just tell me, and they trust them so much, they're just like, tell me what to do, I'm good. Like they don't want well, that's why both exist. To belaborate, correct, right? Yeah, I don't like so now you know you guys, like this is uh food for thought. Yeah, you know, that's even to choose. Yeah, and that's something to think about it, truly.

Speaker 2 10:18

Yeah, yeah, because you know the OB appointments are typically, you know, faster, more medically focused, like like you said.

Speaker 10:26

So yeah, exactly. And other and other people just want to process every decision. They like they need the processing, they need to take it into okay, what is this? And they like the detailed. Although, um would you agree there are clients that like you have to be really careful what questions you answer? Like they'll go down rabbit holes with you, and you eventually are like, no, I'm not gonna answer that. That will not be beneficial for me.

Speaker 2 10:49

I always think to myself, because they're overthinkers. Know your client. Yeah, yeah. Like know your client because you can totally you could say something that is so like you know, it's very it it's okay, but to that one client, it can make them go down spiral and go down that like that that rabbit hole. Right.

Speaker 11:10

I have often said, I have an answer for that, but it will not be beneficial for you right now.

Speaker 2 11:16

Yeah. Like, let's take a second.

Speaker 11:19

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 11:20

And a lot of people like when we're thinking about like OBs um versus midwives and the information that they give and how much information, like, and even with doulas, like yeah, sometimes they're just like, okay, please tell me that everything is good, yeah, and just let me go.

Speaker 11:36

Yeah, like yeah, just let me go. That's right. They don't they do not want the point belabored, like in my in my experience. Um and yet there are some okay, here's a really interesting one. I had uh a birth recently where the OB uh was talking, doing all things. I kept looking at his badge. I kept being like, it says MD, right? Like, because the way he was talking was not like an OB. And I was like afterwards, I actually was so proud of myself, Misty, because I was like, note to self, ask where he went to school. I want to know. I know. I'm thinking if it was do you know who I'm talking about? That Lutheran? Yes, Dr. Matt. That's right.

Speaker 2 12:16

Well, he was he was trained by midwives.

Speaker 12:19

Yeah, so I was like, oh, there it is. Yeah, that makes sense. I knew exactly when you were like Dr. Matt. Yeah. Yeah, it really could kind of tell. Yeah, it threw me for a loop. I was like, okay, he's awesome. That's amazing. Yeah, me too.

Speaker 2 12:32

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, and we'll talk a little bit about like their uh philosophies of care and kind of like their training.

Training And Philosophy In Labor

Speaker 2 12:41

So you know, midwives typically are trained more on like physiological birth, um, you know, versus like risk management. Um I always say like doctors or OBs like tend to be a bit more where they manage birth versus letting birth just be.

Speaker 13:04

Yeah, I always tell my clients, OBs will um will manage your labor and midwife will let you labor.

Speaker 1 13:10

There you go.

Speaker 13:11

That's what I it's kind of a clarification. And not that, and again, I'll emphasize it's not one that's better than the other. In fact, we'll like that's why you get to choose. That's why this is so important. That's why this episode is so important. If you know about somebody that's pregnant and they really don't know what they want, send them this episode because I think a lot don't you feel like when we talk to them, they don't know, right? Um, I also feel like the a big difference is prevention versus intervention, you know, like um speak to that.

Speaker 2 13:43

Well, like what is actual risk versus relative risk? Yeah, you know, um and it's always important, like, oh well, you're over 35, you're considered a trans paternal age or a geriatric. Like, okay, well, we understand that that can increase some things, but it doesn't mean that every 35 and a half year old, every 36-year-old woman needs to be treated as a high risk person.

Speaker 14:08

I always say the Western model is like all about prevention, and it's on this broad scale, but it doesn't necessarily mean that that is what's best for you. Um, you know, and you are your own individual.

Speaker 2 14:20

I feel like to be patient-centered. Correct, correct. Just yeah. Not not just because, oh, you have uh, you know, you're 35, there you go, put you in that lane, or you're vi IVF. No thousand.

Speaker 14:34

Or you're water broke. This is a really I mean that's why I feel like having a midwife would have been so much so beneficial for me with my first, because a midwife, knowing what I know now, a midwife would have absolutely told me to stay home. Yeah. Stay home. You're GBS negative. Stay home. I was totally healthy, fit, nothing, no red flags, um, not geriatric, no GBS negative, uh, first baby. Like, I absolutely should not have gone in. And and that is why my birth turned into an induction. Yeah. You know? So neither hand or there. But anyway.

Speaker 2 15:10

Um Well, I also think like when you when I hear clients talk about midwives, when I used to talk about my midwife, it was always you're on that first name basis. First name, right? So it's like my midwife is Amy. Oh, yeah. Not, you know, nursing or whatever. Right. You're um whereas I'm like Dr. Gore. Yeah. But I will say what I love, like Dr. Matt. Matt is not his last name. It's not his last name. Well, I can't say his last name, I'll be honest. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 15:39

Sorry, Dr. Matt.

unknown 15:40

Yeah.

Speaker 2 15:41

But, you know, there's those doctors that are just like, no, call me my by my first name. Like you don't have to. So I feel like there's There's an exception to the we're being very uh, what do you say?

Speaker 15:54

Um general like this. Yeah, very generalization.

Speaker 2 15:57

It's not every OB or you know, like that.

Speaker 16:00

But yeah. Um anyway.

Speaker 2 16:02

Okay, so kind of going back to like what you were saying before, whereas, you know, um there's a tends to be a bit more management on the OB side and more just letting labor be. Yeah. Do you feel like have you noticed that labor support tends to look different with the midwives in in the birthroom?

Speaker 16:22

That's a great question. Yes. Like significantly so. Um overall, I feel like if there's a a midwife, they actually love working with duelists for the most part. It's very rare that I get any um pushback. They really feel like we're part of the team. Um, and they they ask questions. They want to know how it's been going, how's my client feeling? Um, they are like we do, you know, for example, all the spinning baby moves, or I'll be like, hey, you did the cervical check. Can you give me any feedback on that? Can you tell babies positioning internally? And they're so willing to collab and be like, yeah, let's do these position changes eat through laboring and through pushing.

Speaker 2 17:04

Yeah. So they're they're kind of trained in more of the alternative type solutions versus just the medical like intervention when we think of medical intervention like you know, pitocin or you know augmenting or anything. That's right.

Speaker 17:20

They are definitely they're definitely um uh more like they they want to go, I wouldn't say always more holistic, um, but they very much trust my client.

Speaker 2 17:31

Yeah.

Speaker 17:32

Like they want to hear what they're they want to know. What's your body feeling? Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 2 17:35

And their verbiage. Correct. Like you can definitely tell like their language and the and the verbiage that they use. I'm like, oh yeah, you can definitely tell. Yeah.

Speaker 17:44

And I I mean I've also had OBs who are also hands-off and and supportive of what we call, you know, I think the general public says um uh uh unmedicated, or you know, what do they say? Natural birth. They say natural. So we, you

Support In The Birth Room

Speaker 17:59

know, just FYI, correct your friends, like very, very graciously say all birth is natural, but we talk about physiological birth and medicated or medicated, you know. And I have had OBs who are super hands-off and also very supportive of that. Um, but I'd be lying if I said that they don't quite often jump in and want to intervene. Like it's just how they're trained. Yeah. Well, and it's just different.

Speaker 2 18:27

I also want to point out that personality matters so much, um, just as much as like the title. So whether they're OB or whether a midwife, it's like, how do you jive? Like, how do you work together? You know, do you match well with with them? Because and again, like it kind of it does suck that we can't have all what Tammy had and what what Linda had of you know, you have your consistent that's right, consistent person.

Speaker 3 19:01

Right.

Speaker 2 19:01

Um, but you definitely want to make sure that whoever is in that space that you feel good with that. Right. You know, I kind of joke with my clients, like yeah, when we have um when I do a consultation or when I'm talking to somebody, I'm like, look, you need to make sure that you can be naked in front of me. Um I'm gonna see parts of your body that maybe your partner has never even seen. So I need you to be okay with that. So same kind of same goes for your provider, right? You gotta feel like you're, you know, you're able.

Speaker 19:36

Um you're so vulnerable in front of them. Yeah. So personality matters a huge it's a huge yeah. I always say to my client, technically, as a dual of like we are non-medical, but we are all up in your you know what. Right? That's my all-up. Literally, I say that's every single consultation. Yeah, go ahead.

Speaker 2 19:56

We're all up there. Um, some other things like I I'll just throw out there some things that I notice between the two. We don't have to like get too deep into it, but like, you know, induction styles, like you know, you tend to have a bit more inductions with OBs because again, that like management, um, epidurals. This isn't this is one that surprises a lot of people. Sure. Even my moms that have given birth before, and then they're going to give birth a second time, and they're like, I really want to go unmedicated again.

Speaker 3 20:27

Yeah.

Speaker 2 20:28

Um, no epidural. I'm like, well, have you thought about a midwife? And they're like, oh, well, yeah. Or I'm sorry. Yeah. Opposite. Opposite of that. Like, I want to meditate. Sorry, I went unmedicated, now I'm thinking of a girl. Um and I'm like, well, have you thought, you know, thought about a midwife or you care? They're like, oh, well, I didn't realize that they support you know, midwife support, right? Medicated births. Like I just thought like you had if you had a midwife, like yeah, you have to go natural.

Speaker 20:57

Oh no, right? Uh un medicated. Yeah. No, it's so true. That's that is definitely a um uh what do you what do you call it? A myth. It's definitely a myth about birth. Um, what about like I notice also um pushing positions, like we were talking about earlier. Like, I quite often uh, you know, my clients are like, I really don't want to be on my back, you know, like you see in the textbook and um XYZ. And I was like, honestly, but I will say I and I tell my clients this pat yourself on the back for being in Colorado. Because I have you noticed this, like I majority of midwives and OBs, they don't want you pushing on your back, medicated or unmedicated. We start on the back, especially with if you're medicated. I'm just gonna decide. Especially first time, correct. That's a good point. With an epidural, like medicated with an epidural, they oh, I I noticed they start on the back, but they always go to like, hey, let's go to the side. Yeah, do you how do you feel here? Do you want to move to your side?

Speaker 2 21:53

Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 21:54

Which is really cool.

Speaker 2 21:55

Yeah. I have seen a big increase of um obesity. And and you know, midwives

Induction Epidurals Positions Monitoring

Speaker 2 22:02

on either one that um have been actually delivering the baby in other positions. Like I read a lot on um, you know, squatting recently, yeah, ums, and so I was like, oh, this is what I'm saying.

Speaker 22:18

I recently and I recently had a a delivery with an OB and that he let the dad deliver the baby. Yeah.

Speaker 2 22:25

I remember you telling me that.

Speaker 22:26

Holy cow's cool. Because the dad spoke, his dad's like, I would really love and he's like, honestly, if everything is well, mom's well, baby's good, he's like, but no, I'm just gonna push you out of the way. Like, you know, just be prepared. I'm gonna shove you out the way if something comes in.

Speaker 2 22:42

That's that's always an option, guys, too. Like just clean that out.

Speaker 22:46

Like, it's so cool.

Speaker 2 22:47

You should always ask these things.

Speaker 22:48

Like, you know, what's about what about okay, Missy talked about monitoring? This is a huge difference I see with um OBs as opposed to midwives. Intermittent mon monitoring.

Speaker 2 23:00

Yeah, so the intermittent intermittent versus the consistent, definitely more consistent monitoring with um, you know, OB practices. Um I just had one the other day that it was an induction. So whenever you do an induction and you give pharmaceuticals to augment your labor, um, there are risks to those. So and to to mom and to baby. So they have to consistently monitor. Right. So this one client, she had her um had her induction, but I when I got there, she wasn't being monitored, and I was just like, Oh, they took, you know, I was like, oh, they took you off the monitor. She's like, Yeah, wow. They said um baby looked great. They said baby looked great, like the medication was out of my system, so we're good. So I was like, oh, even some of that is shifting too, of like, right, oh, we're you know, moving, um, you know, moving moving forward a little bit, which I love. Which I like. But yeah, I do see more of the intermittent monitoring um with midwives versus with the obese. It doesn't mean that it's impossible. Sure. It just means that they tend to go towards the consistent monitoring.

Speaker 24:13

Right. Do you encourage your client? Well, I feel like more so I encourage my clients to ask. Because sometimes you just don't know. So I think sometimes they just don't ask because it's presented to them like, hey, this is what we're doing. And and quite often I've been like, is is this necessary? Yeah. Could we could we not do that? Is there any way we could not? Um yeah. So I think that's really cool.

Speaker 2 24:38

Think of think of brain. That's right. You know, so think of those benefits, risks, alternatives, intuition, yeah. So yeah, just remember that acronym when you're in that space and for situations like that. So it's always good to pull out of your back pocket.

Speaker 24:58

And you know, you can use it with your kids to ask mine. Yeah. They're like stop talking about it. Stop the brain, doing the brain acronym. Should I go out with those kids tonight? I'm like, okay, never mind. Um, let's see.

Social Media Bias And Choosing What Fits

Speaker 25:12

I I also think uh it's really important to point out that social media uh points OBs as an enemy quite often, um, especially in our subculture, right? In the doula world. And and it's not always our experience. That are amazing, and that anytime you're using social media to back up what you're doing, you can go down a rabbit hole in either way. Absolutely. Right.

Speaker 2 25:38

Yeah, you can kind of find the data to back up whatever it is that you're searching for. And I feel like, you know, like in life in general, right? Just you can find that with opposing ends, but totally, you know, um the birth community is very, you know, can be anti-this or anti-that.

Speaker 25:56

Right.

Speaker 2 25:56

Um, and I feel like that's what kind of makes us different.

Speaker 25:59

Yes.

Speaker 2 26:00

Um, is that we aren't like we're very much, we're very pro you and what feels right to you. And it's not going, it's not linear. Right. Again, that word that you love. Um, it's really based on what your needs are.

Speaker 26:17

It's a very unique and individual type thing. I've also been surprised in births where they, I think my clients have thought, oh, I wanted it a certain way, and then they are genuinely pre pleasantly surprised by the care they receive. Yeah. They were not anticipating at all. You know? Yeah. Whether that's OB or midwifery. Flip versus vice versa, like either way, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But ultimately you get to choose.

Speaker 2 26:45

Yeah. Right? What comes down, what aligns most for your values, for your wants, your wishes, your needs.

Speaker 26:52

How do you communicate? Do you like more time? Do you like less time? Yeah. So that's what we just really wanted to point out today. Um what um, okay, so this is kind of fun.

Questions To Ask Your Provider

Speaker 27:04

Let's not ask each other some questions. Okay. Sure.

Speaker 2 27:10

Okay. What if someone is pregnant and trying to decide like what questions should they ask? Yeah, okay. Get your pen and paper ready. So write these down. If you're driving, just put a pause.

Speaker 27:23

Yeah. Be safe, ladies. No, um, okay, so I have one. Uh, how do you feel? Ask your provider. How do you feel about inductions? Find out what how they go about it. Um, when do they plan on inducing their quote unquote cutoff? Correct.

Speaker 1 27:41

Right. Like a lot of how long will they let you be pregnant? Yeah.

Speaker 2 27:44

And a lot, you know, because a lot of OBs have a you know, they're more along the line of we want you to give birth within 41 weeks. Right. Um, whereas, you know, a lot of midwives are up to the 42-week mark, which is what ACOG kind of recommends. Correct.

Speaker 27:59

Yeah. Okay. What's another one you would ask us to?

Speaker 2 28:02

I'd say, you know, what is your philosophy on birth? Like, especially when it comes to wanting like physiological birth. And you know, what does your management look like?

Speaker 28:16

Very good. Um, what another one I like to have my clients ask is what you know, what are your methods if my labor slows down? What if I stall? Unmedicated or medicated. Like, you know, right. Like if I get an epidural and there's a stall, I mean, that's almost always gonna happen because epidural slow things down. But um, what if I'm unmedicated and there's a stall? Like what is your go-to in that instance? Um, I think that says a lot about your provider. And how open are you to my you know, my wishes before we jump in before we jump into your for example will you let me use a breast pump to increase the oxytocin as opposed to pictosin? Right. Yeah, my own body versus science.

Speaker 1 29:01

Right, right.

Speaker 2 29:01

Um, you know, another is like, what is your c-section rate? Obviously. That's a big um we talked about that in our C-section podcast. It's always good to know what their C-section rates are. You know, I'll say again, you know, midwives tend to have lower C-section rates just because they are more on the uh um less is more type approach. Um or transfer. You could ask you you could ask the midwives, you know, what's your transfer rate? What yeah, if you're at a birth center. Right if birth center or a home birth birth, yeah. And you pointed something out before Tammy too that I, you know, want to say again is you sometimes these rates, like C-section rates, can be very kind of skewed because if you look at OBs versus midwives, OBs see a lot of high risk. Yes.

Speaker 29:49

So you may have more or they're treating IVF moms or invertility, right? High risk pregnancies or MFM. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. So that makes a difference. Um will I know who delivers my baby? Yeah, because it's so different than how it used to be, right?

Speaker 2 30:09

Correct. Yeah, yeah. So how how will I know who's there? Or I had a client actually, I did a um prenatal yesterday with a client, and she said that she was calling in today because they were giving her the on-call schedule. Oh, which I was like, oh, that's the first time I've ever heard of an OB giving them the on-call schedule.

Speaker 30:30

That's pretty common now. I have kind of a couple, and it depends what practice you're with. I know, and we can only speak to Colorado, obviously, but I've had a couple moms do that because one of the practices we work with, they alternate, you know, they don't do weekends, and so they alternate with another practice they share on call. Yeah, yeah, which makes a big difference as well.

Speaker 2 30:48

So I like I look there's one you want to throw out there. Oh, yeah, yeah. How do you work with doula's? I feel like that's like big things. Like, what do you think of doula? Because if you have your doula and then you're talking about, definitely let them know you have a doula. Or midwife, you can, you know, is like, no, I don't really work a lot with doulas. I don't think you know, not that they usually talk badly, but I did have one client actually that said that her OB said that she doesn't like midwives. Oh, I've had I've had Or I'm sorry, does OB said she doesn't like doulas?

Speaker 31:24

I've had that happen a lot. I've also and tell me this because I think this is a testament to us as doulas. You can I'm gonna pat Misty on the back. I know you've said to me before where you've gone into a birth and that is the attitude. And then after the OB and or midwife is like, hey, would it be okay if I got your contact details? I would love to refer my clients to you. Yeah. And I think they're pleasantly surprised by how we do lay, like in the industry, there's always that one that gives us a bad name, right? Or yeah, there's always gonna be that's a high compliment. It's the highest compliment, honestly.

Speaker 2 32:00

Yeah, I uh attended a birth recently and the um nurse uh came pulling. Or the nurse, yeah. You're the best one I've ever worked with. And I was like, oh, that's supposed to be a Q in your review.

Speaker 1 32:16

Could you scan this QR code, please? Yeah, please, please but not. What do you say? Like and subscribe. Like and subscribe. Click here.

Speaker 32:27

That's funny. That's really sweet. I'm not surprised you are an amazing dungeon. Oh, so um, so I think the biggest takeaway is that there just like everything else, there's really not

Feeling Safe Changing Minds Closing CTA

Speaker 32:37

one right answer. There's just not in just a right answer for you. Correct. Be educated and know um what is good for you, but there's, you know, everybody, everybody to what different strokes for different folks.

Speaker 2 32:50

Right. And and the ultimate goal is you want to feel heard, respected, yes, informed, yep, and feel safe. That is the biggest one is feeling safe with your provider. You cannot have a baby if a bear is chasing you.

Speaker 33:04

Yeah, I like that.

Speaker 2 33:06

Exactly. You can't poop you.

Speaker 1 33:08

Yeah, you don't want to open, you know. That's just kind of how it is. You have to learn to trust those people in your space. So you gotta relax. Yeah.

Speaker 2 33:17

But that's that's really good. And yeah, you know, always, always remember that you can change your mind. That's right. At any time that doesn't feel right, right. You can change your mind. You can't fire your provider. It listen to that now. Yeah. Pause. Re-listen. You can fire your provider. Please. Yeah.

Speaker 33:41

Because if you don't feel safe, there's no point. You're not gonna have a birth of birth you want, you just want. Um, you're not stuck. And that's one of the reasons duos exist, I think. Truly, why we have a job. Because we get to help you navigate all of this. That's why we meet with you prenatally. That's literally during the consultation, isn't it? One of the first questions you ask. I guess like this first or second question, besides Hi, how are you doing today? Yeah. It's like, okay, tell me more. Like, who's your provider? Are you happy with them? Yeah, how is that going? How is it? Yeah.

Speaker 2 34:15

How are you feeling with that relationship?

Speaker 34:17

Totally. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, I would say definitely go um like and subscribe. Yeah. Like pass it on. If you know somebody that's um just newly pregnant, please share this episode with them. Uh, and uh, you can definitely comment and leave comment in the comment section. Leave a review.

Speaker 2 34:38

Yeah, leave a review, download, pass it on. All the things, ladies. All the things. It's been great sitting here talking to you again, Tammy, and with all these ladies. So see you next time. Bye bye.

Speaker 3 34:50

Bye.