Courtship vs Dating: How to Avoid Feminine Men

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Transcript

0:32

It seems that a lot of women these days are out here googling about how to avoid dating feminine men because it's the number one keyword on this YouTube channel, and it's come to my attention that most women out here just don't know how to vet. Men, and I've talked about this before. So in this video, for those of you who are tired of the feminine men, I'm gonna be teaching you what it is that you should be looking for when you're out here dating, and I'm gonna be sharing a huge mindset shift that will help you and make your dating life easier. Hi, my name is Amanda. Welcome to this channel where we talk about how to manifest what you want in life without all the extra stress, chaos, and drama. That most people are accustomed to, if that's something that you're interested in, make sure to subscribe and hit the notification bell so you don't miss a single video. That we have coming out on this channel. If you find this, uh, video helpful, give it a thumbs up, share it with a girlfriend. There seems to be a whole lot of confusion out here and that can help you get us, get it in front of more people and ease a lot of the confusion. And you can check out a lot of our free resources like our Enhance Your Feminine Energy Guide or my four step Manifestation Process. In the description below, as well as many of the courses and programs that we have available to help you with your dating and relationships. Let's get into it. What the F is going on out here when it comes to all of y'all Googling what a feminine man is. So I understand that right now the struggle is real and this is a struggle that is happening. All over the world. To be clear, um, my husband runs a relocation and real estate business. We currently spend a lot of time in Mexico, but we have, uh, contacts in multiple countries and they tell us that they're experiencing similar things with their clients or comments that people are making. The single people in general, that the women are just saying, Hey, I've been all over the world, and the men are trash, like, or they're very feminine now, I think. It's happening in some cultures more than others. It's definitely an issue in the United States. It's definitely an issue in Canada. It's definitely an issue in the uk. It's definitely an issue in Western Europe, but it seems that it's kind of like spreading all over the world right now. So I want to do this video to the ladies to teach you what it is that you should actually be looking for in men and the mindset with which you should be dating this men. So let's start there. Number one, you need to start dating, not casually, not, you know, willy-nilly not. Let's see what happens. Not I'm lonely and bored. You need to start dating with the intention of, I'm going to be getting married. That's it. You're dating for marriage, not dating for fun or dating to see what happens or dating to see where things go, or all these wishy-washy things that mean absolutely nothing. If you wanna get married and you wanna get married to a serious masculine guy. Your best bet is to start looking at dating, not as this casual thing as it's turned into in western culture, but as courtship for marriage. That being, that being said, in your mind, the point of dating is to find a partner. This is why I didn't do a whole lot of the casual dating'cause in my mind I'm like, no, I wanna get married. So when I was ready to get married, I pretty much let the men know upfront. My husband knew before we were even dating that I wanted to get married. Okay. And what happens with a lot of women is that they fall into this wishy-washy gray area, limbo, situationship. Kind of a thing because they're just not clear about what it is that they actually want and they're not actually dating with intention. So that's the mindset shift that you, my dear, need to make. And that automatically will already, a lot of the feminine men will already start to fall off. So now let's talk about, um, the feminine men versus the masculine men. The masculine men. Are more mature. The feminine men act more like children. It's like they never grew up, they never matured. They put a lot of the burden on you. Um, you know, they put the burden of the finances on you. They never take responsibility for anything. They're very emotional for. Men. Men, masculine men and healthy men are not. Typically very emotional. Um, they're typically very stoic. It doesn't mean that they don't have feelings or that they don't get stressed or that they don't get angry. It just means they know how to regulate themselves pretty quickly. In fact, I recently did a video on the difference between a woman's nervous system and a man's nervous system. A healthy man will get to baseline and regulate a lot faster than a woman will. So if you're dating a guy and he's just in his fucking feelings all the time, that's a red flag. That's something. To look out for. What you should be looking for when it comes to men is are they responsible? Are they reliable? Do they have integrity? Do they do what they say they're going to do? Super important. It's the first thing I noticed about my husband is he always said what he, he always did what he said he was going to do without fail. And if for whatever reason he could not. He would communicate. Does the man move toward you or is he making you chase him all the time? That's another thing to look out for. Another thing to look out, for those of you who run businesses, I need you to really pay attention to what I'm about to say. Those of you who are single and you're CEOs of businesses and you make six and seven figures a year, or you're very high up in your professional career, please pay attention to this when you are dating you, my dear. Also need to vet for a man who is. Competent as competent or even more competent than you when it comes to those matters. Because a lot of women, high performing, high achieving women will let, will not vet men properly, then hand over their business to a man who destroys the whole freaking business. That is something that happens. Or they will end up with men who they need to take care of and who want a mommy. So one of the things, those of you who are very high performing, that you really need to look out for when it comes to vetting is, is this person competent? Right. Is this person as competent in me or more competent than me, uh, in business or my career or in whatever field? I will give you an example. Another thing that I noticed about my husband was that he was more competent than me. When it comes to business, he's way more competent than me. I mean, I was doing pretty good. I had an almost seven figure business just on my own, but my brain and his brain operate completely differently. I'm definitely a lot more in feminine energy. He's more in healthy masculine energy, and I knew that I was not going to be in a situation where I have this like huge business and I'm out here taking care of a man. I knew that wasn't going to happen. I was willing to collaborate with somebody. I was willing to partner with somebody. I was willing to marry a man who was more competent than me so he could take a lot of the CEO burden that I hated off of my plate. That's another thing to look out for, for those of you who are high performers and high achievers. Um, and if you don't wanna work, look for a man who doesn't. Make you work, right? Look for a man who's totally okay with getting to a point that if you don't wanna work, you don't have to. That is a sign of a mature man, and it's because men are biologically wired to protect and to provide. It is in their brains. This is like eons of programming at this point. And if you wanna learn more about it, make sure to check out our Feminine Magnetism Mastery program because a lot of you. I think what's happening in a lot of modern society, uh, particularly in the western world, is just like everybody just tries to fight their biology and everybody just tries to fight nature and everybody just tries to fight. The fact that we really haven't evolved all that much. From our ancestors and our nervous systems certainly have not evolved all that much from our ancestors. A lot of times our nervous systems are still causing a lot of problems for us and still think that we're being chased by lions all day long, and that's why everybody's so dramatic and stressed out and chaotic and making mountains out of molehills and making life more difficult than it needs to be. So that's really important. A lot of people out here just fighting biology all the time. And I think that's one of the reasons why we're seeing so much conflict, um, in relationship right now, especially in certain parts of the world. So let's get back to what it is that you should be looking for and what you should be vetting for, right? Um, and I'll make it simple. Is he stoic? Meaning he's not overly emotional? Does he take responsibility? For his actions. Does he take responsibility for his life? Um, is he a protector and a provider? And a provider doesn't necessarily mean does he make millions of dollars? That's something that immature women think a provider means. Can he handle most of the lion's share? Is he going to take a lot of the burden off of me so I can be more in feminine energy? And does he actually enjoy it? Because a masculine, healthy man enjoys doing that for his woman. He enjoys it. It makes him proud, it gives him confidence. It makes him feel like a man when he's able to do that. Another thing to look out for integrity. Do they do what they say they are going to do? And if for whatever reason they are not able to do they communicate that with you, that is also very important. And finally, do you have the same values and shared goals? A lot of people go out here because they don't know how to vet for marriage and they don't know how to vet for good partnership. They just do everything based on feelings and chemistry and they're like, I just, I just need the sparks to fly. And what a lot of people don't realize is a lot of the times those sparks. That intensity very much in the beginning is actually very deceiving, and some of the best relationships that people have statistically are people who met through work. Started off as friends first, or met through friends and family, not, I met'em at a bar and I was drunk and the sparks were flying, or I was really lonely one night and I went on Tinder, you know, um, statistically seriously, you can go look it up. It is met through family and friends. Met through work, we're friends first. Those are the relationships that tend to last the longest. In my husband and I's Case, we met through work and we were friends first, and that's one of the reasons why it works out so well and when a lot of people in, especially in the Western world where things are a lot more individualistic. What ends up happening is that they think it's all about their feelings and the chemistry and the romance and the this and the that, and that's just like a tiny little piece of the entire puzzle and what other cultures understand. I'm not saying that they're perfect, they're not. They also have their issues. But what other cultures understand is that when you have shared values and you have shared goals. And you're really vetting properly, like for the long term. The love grows and grows and grows and grows. You know, my husband and I started off as friends first. It wasn't like crazy chaotic chemistry sparks, but we were just talking about this the other day. We fall more and more in love with each other every single day. And a lot of that has to do with the fact that we have shared values and shared goals. And then of course, when you're with somebody long enough and you overcome challenges together. That also completely bonds you. So you know what, I'm gonna add another one to this list. How do they handle conflict? I knew my husband handled it really well. I knew my husband was really good under pressure. I knew my husband was really good under stressful situations. I know that he did not run, he did not hide, he did not, um, try and avoid responsibility. He did not try to avoid challenge. He would step up. And he would take responsibility and he would do what he needs to do. That was one of the things I was like, ding, ding, ding, green flag. And I highly recommend to women, right? Pay attention to the men that you're dating, how they respond when they're under pressure and stress. How do they respond? Because that's going to tell you a lot about later on in life, when life starts to life. How they're going to respond in stressful, challenging situations that are inevitable when you are with somebody long enough, and honestly are just inevitable as a part of life. So I hope this was very helpful to you. You can check out all our polarity and relationship classes in the description below. They're all there. Laid out for you so you can just pick the one that makes the most sense for you. For those of you who wanna go deeper, another resource that I recommend is our free. Enhance your Feminine Energy Guide totally free. It'll show you how to start using more of your feminine energy in different areas of your life. It will definitely help improve the love and romance situation. Thank you so much for giving me your time today. Make sure to subscribe, like hit the notification, but I'll do all the things and I will catch you on the next one.