Wedding Hive Podcast
Giving you the tea and ALL the buzz in the wedding world! New episodes every Wednesday!
Wedding Hive Podcast
002- Money Talks: Navigating Wedding Budgets
We dive deep into the often uncomfortable topic of wedding budgets, sharing practical advice on navigating financial decisions without starting your marriage in debt.
• Create a dedicated wedding email address for all vendor communications
• Begin a Pinterest board even before you've solidified your vision
• Determine guest count early as it significantly impacts your overall budget
• Have clear conversations with family about financial contributions and boundaries
• Consider recording your dress alterations appointment for reference on your wedding day
• Be transparent with bridal party members about expected costs
• Look for all-inclusive venues to simplify planning and potentially save money
• Consider DIY options for decor and florals using resources like Costco and Trader Joe's
• Prioritize photography since those images become your permanent memories
• Find the balance between wedding expectations and realistic budget constraints
Join us for our next episode of The Wedding Hive where we'll continue bringing you the tea and all the buzz in the wedding world.
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Okay, what do you think? So there's always like, let's be real, we all know there's a lingering joke of like it's your last night of freedom and the guys should go to strip clubs. What do you think about that? Ooh, is it a yes or no?
Speaker 2:I think, hey Queens, it's Kelsey and Grace back with the wedding, high vibe giving you the tea and all the buzz in the wedding world.
Speaker 1:Let's jump right in um. Yeah, monday I went to a spring training game and it was super fun, but it was so insanely hot it was like 91 degrees and we always get the lawn seats because I just like to walk around and get the snacks. I don't actually watch the game, I don't know if what. Do you actually watch the baseball game? I know nothing about baseball. Thank you, they're just like for it's just for like the environment and to just have like a fun time. So I went and did that on Monday, which is fun, and then the weekend I didn't do much, but you had your wedding and I need you to tell the listeners what happened at your wedding.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was an absolutely beautiful wedding. You got to come hang out with me. There was a beer burrow, there was an abote cart. I'm obsessed with beer burrows. Yes, what else? It was such a gorgeous wedding. Their layout was beautiful, their signage was beautiful.
Speaker 1:Their first dance had me in tears. Yeah, it was beautiful, it was such a good job, incredible.
Speaker 2:Absolutely nothing went wrong until the shuttle bus decided to take its own directions and shortcut to the venue and got stuck in a dirt lot. I don't even know they turned on the wrong way and completely jacked it up.
Speaker 1:So.
Speaker 2:I got a phone call after the alcohol had shut down and the music had turned off and they were stuck. So it was an experience, to say the least, covered in dirt. I have never dug out a shuttle bus, a 56 passenger shuttle bus, but now I can check that off my list. I know, now you can check it off your list, so you did that. Yeah, my husband didn't believe me when I came home like covered in dirt.
Speaker 1:Oh, my gosh, my black clothes were brown. What were you?
Speaker 2:doing. Yeah, he's like what is happening with you? I'm so dead so that was my. Saturday that was your groom left before the couple or the bride and groom left before the guests did, so they honestly had no idea about it because they had a getaway vehicle. Yeah, so they had no idea.
Speaker 1:It's fine, so I guess you're fine, yeah, as long as the bride and groom didn't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and everybody was happy.
Speaker 1:Okay, and that's all that matters, and the day went smoothly besides that. So you know, um, but welcome back you guys to our second episode of the Wedding Hive. We hope you guys enjoyed our first episode. Today's episode is going to be all about budgeting. We know how money I was thinking about it today. Money is one of those topics that's so hard and awkward to talk about. You know, whether it's in your daily life, whether it's at your job, weddings. So we're here to talk about budgeting and kind of what you should maybe spend money on, what you shouldn't, the timeline and all that good stuff. So Kelsey's going to start us off. So what do you do?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you're newly engaged, you are getting ready to figure out what you want, pick out details, but my first tip of advice to you is to first create your wedding email. And second is start a Pinterest board. So your wedding email that's where you're going to want to funnel everything in through, so all of those emails are coming to one place. You don't want it to get mixed up with your mail and your school and your work and all of those details. Put it all into one place. That way also, once you are married and you have collected your photo album from your photographer, you don't have to get spammed any longer on all of the wedding things.
Speaker 2:So first thing I would say is start a wedding email so everything goes into that spot. And second is that Pinterest board. So, even if nothing makes sense, in your Pinterest board you have all of the randoms you haven't figured out what style you want, what you're looking for, what your design and your mood board looks like. This at least gives you an idea of what you're looking at. You can easily remove things, but nothing sucks worse than finding something great on Pinterest. You think about it, you don't pin it and then you can't find it in the future.
Speaker 2:So Pinterest boards and emails are like starting tip one.
Speaker 1:I think that's so smart. I remember when you told me I'd already been married, obviously, and you said the wedding email, and I'm like, oh my gosh, why did I not think of that? Because there's definitely that time. You have, you know, the emails from the bartenders, from vendors, from your coordinator wedding venue, and it's like, oh my gosh, I have not a specific email and everything's just out of order. So I love that tip.
Speaker 2:And then you get the email from your loan officer on your student loans and they're like please make a payment and you're like no, it's like that after payment text, you get payment due into it.
Speaker 1:I'm like no, why what?
Speaker 2:No, correct. So that would be my first tip in starting the process. Obviously you want to start your guest list. You want to kind of have a rough idea of how many guests you're inviting.
Speaker 1:Yep, that's a big part of the budget is guest count. I remember we booked for 100 and by the time we got down to it, we were down to 55, and it makes a big difference.
Speaker 1:So I think it's smart, though, to have you know your budget set, because, let's be real, you can't start the planning process until you have that Um, and also, I think, a big smart thing this is my opinions I think the top thing priority wise for budget is venue and you know kind of taking your time to go and look at different spots and kind of taking your time to go and look at different spots, see what fits your budget, see what fits your aesthetic, Because some venues have inclusive packages, Some venues it's like this is the space and that's all you get and then you have to put into budget of you spending everything else. So I think venue is like big to start with.
Speaker 2:Yes, and you can't lock in your date without picking your venue, exactly Because not every venue has your date open. So, being flexible, having an idea of the season that you're looking for, maybe the day of the week, but being stuck on one specific day, is going to limit your options in picking your venue, because many venues book out, I know, I feel like it's crazy.
Speaker 1:You'll go and look. I mean, I only looked at one venue but I feel like I hear so many brides saying, oh, we're starting the process and we were going to wait a little bit. And then they go and tour these venues and they're like oh, we don't have availability till 2027. And you don't think about that. You think, oh, you know it's going to be open, it's fine, but there's so many people getting married. It's insane.
Speaker 2:So, and realistically, there's only four Saturdays in a month, so oh yeah that's true Four times 12,. That, what gives you 64? I'm terrible at math Is my math right? Mental math is not for me. 24, 48, 48, 48, that gives you 48 saturdays, yep ish. I don't know where I got 64 from. I don't know, I know we said. We said we're podcasters, not mathematicians don't test me on my math and don't tell my children I know right, oh my gosh, don't tell my sister she's a math teacher.
Speaker 1:but you know, I'm always saying she's a math teacher, not me, me, correct.
Speaker 2:But when you are looking at you think, oh, I have all of these options, well there's. You. Limit it when you're stuck to one day, so don't be stuck on that one day. The different ways that you can look at paying for your wedding. You can take out a loan, you can open up a credit card. One of my favorite suggestions to couples and and I don't know how many actually take this up, but it is picking up a second job. If you do not want to go into marriage with additional debt, go get a part-time job as a barista at Starbucks, go to DoorDash, go to Uber Eats. Go donate plasma. Plasma pays a lot, did you?
Speaker 1:donate plasma. Have you ever done that?
Speaker 2:Yes, I've donated plasma.
Speaker 1:I've thought about it when I was like super broke and then I was like wait, I don't know if this is not, that it's not legitimate. But I was like, oh my God, am I really going to do this?
Speaker 2:But yes, I've donated plasma, I mean.
Speaker 1:I'm here for it.
Speaker 2:It's not for the week it is-.
Speaker 1:So you guys would be there like for a long time, or how long.
Speaker 2:The first time. It's like in and out. It maybe takes 40 minutes, it depends.
Speaker 1:As long as you're hydrated your blood will pump faster.
Speaker 2:If you're not hydrated, you will feel like absolute garbage. Oh, I bet yes.
Speaker 1:I've donated plasma.
Speaker 2:It pays very well. I do not currently. It's been a long time since I've donated plasma, but that is a great easy option, Um as long as your health provider approves it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we are not medical experts. We're not telling everybody to donate plasma.
Speaker 2:Um, but second jobs is another option. Um, and then the biggest one is family support. So family support. Grace, did you pay for your wedding or did you get support from family?
Speaker 1:We got support from family. I always knew that obviously there's a lot that comes into traditions. It used to be, of course, that the parents of the bride always paid for the wedding. And as me and my now husband sat down and we're planning, I said that's not going to happen Like we're in 2025. It's said that's not going to happen Like we're in 2025. Um, it's way more expensive than it used to be. And I said I think we need to have a talk with not only my parents but your parents and see if we can get help and support. Um, cause, realistically, I'm very thankful for both of them, cause there's no way we would have had a wedding without them because, um, because it's very expensive. But we basically I think a big thing when it comes to asking for help is we literally went to lunch with both our parents and sat down.
Speaker 1:We had definitely already decided we wanted to book the venue. We kind of knew the upfront costs and we just were like, can we split it three ways? Thankfully, that conversation went over well and we just did it that way. And then, after the venue up cost and the inclusive package, everything after, things you had on, like videography, photographer, flowers and all that stuff. It kind of was just here and there we would pay for some stuff my parents did his parents, so, um, it all worked out.
Speaker 1:But um, I think a big thing too, if you're sitting down and asking for help and I feel a lot of couples probably feel pressured in is when, oh well, they're paying, so they want something, then that's what has to happen.
Speaker 1:Or if they want X, y, z, then we have to because they're helping us. And that was another thing when we sat down and talked was, if you guys can help, thank you. But at the end of the day, whatever happens or we decide on, it's what John and I want, it's not what you guys want. Of course we love every like we were like, we want opinions and of course, want you there for like planning. But I didn't want it to be a situation that I feel like so many brides and couples are in where they get to their wedding day and, because they got help, it's not what they wanted and I didn't want that for myself. And I think it's just having that firm and just standing on your ground and being like this is my day and I love and appreciate you guys, but that's what's going to happen at the end of the day, so that's what we ended up doing, and it worked out really well for us.
Speaker 2:I think that's so important. I've sat in many meetings with brides and their families and it is a all-out war because there's disagreements, somebody wants it this way, somebody else wants it that way. Well, we paid for it and all of those conversations could have been avoided had they had those earlier conversations and laid down the groundwork. So some tips to having these conversations with your family have that sit down meeting and discuss it. Lay it all out. Have a very clear understanding of the expectation and wishes. Another tip of advice, not to bride and groom, but for those people who are paying for it.
Speaker 2:The first one is and I tell couples this all the time are weddings in today's world are not what they were 30 years ago. 30 years ago people would get together at, like, the town hall. They would get together at a park, they would do a potluck, different elements like that. It was very different. So when we sit down with parents and we hear it come out of their mouth and they go, oh my gosh, I just when I got married 30 years ago and I go, I know correct, but times have changed. That's not how it is anymore. So understand that for the parents, you are not alone. Many parents of newly engaged couples are feeling that.
Speaker 2:The second tip of advice that I have is, if you have somebody outside of your parents who maybe aren't forking up a dollar amount but say, like we want to pay for, let's say, a string quartet, we would love to gift you a string quartet for your wedding, have the couple contract it, but you pay it directly. You pay that invoice, you handle it directly. Pay it straight to the quartet instead of giving the money to the couple. For two reasons. One, the quartet price might have changed a bit, which then will be financially obligated on the couple.
Speaker 2:My second reason is there are many horror stories out there where bride and groom decided last minute let's not get a string quartet, even though Aunt Cindy paid for our string quartet. Nicks the string quartet pocket Aunt Cindy's money. Aunt Cindy shows up at the wedding and goes where's the string quartet I paid for? And they're like ah, we spent it on the bachelor party. That causes horrific scenarios down the road Christmas will never be the same with Aunt Cindy and that also takes the pressure off the bride and groom to have to go through that invoicing side.
Speaker 2:So those are my two suggestions for people who are paying for it, not talking to bride and groom. Back to bride and groom. I think what you're saying is perfect. Have those conversations, lay it out to those people that are helping cover it. There was actually a poll in 2019 that was done by WeddingWire and it said that couples pay for 45% of the wedding, parents pay for 46% and 8% are paid by another party. So if that's a family member, a friend, a godparent, that is what the statistics are showing from 2019.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's crazy. And I think too, like you talked about them spending money on the bachelor party. I think that's another cost.
Speaker 1:A lot of times, brides and grooms maybe don't think about oh yeah, you think it's always oh, we're getting married and then we're going to the bachelorette party, but then it's like, oh wait, we have to pay for the Airbnb and then we have to take off work and then I think a cost that I kind of forgot about I, of course, wanted to spoil my girls who were coming, because it is an upfront cost for them and they don't have to come, but they took the time to come, so I put like bachelor pegs together, which I think are super cute and fun. Bridal proposal boxes was another cost as well, but I think there's other costs that go into it that you forget about a lot of times. What do you think is like the main costs that people don't think about when planning weddings? Or like maybe something that comes up and they think, oh my gosh, I didn't even think about this yeah, so there's so many different pieces of it.
Speaker 2:Mock floral trials, if you want to see your table layout with all of your florals. That cost money. Another one is tastings. Sometimes tastings aren't free. Oh yeah, like food tasting or cake tastings. Sometimes those tastings cost money. Another one is you forget the cost of nails. Hair spray, tans, waxes All of those things are another financial piece. Not everybody puts nails into their budget because most some people do their nails every two weeks, three weeks as it is, and so that's just part of their normal lifestyle. But if you're doing something special for the wedding, you want to add that cost in. What about you? Was there any of them that you forgot?
Speaker 1:I think, the biggest cost that I did not think of. So when I got my wedding dress I was in between sizes and of course they're always like get the bigger size because it's easier to work with more material than and if you don't have enough material then it's makes it way harder. So I got the bigger size and I went to my dress alterations appointment Me, my mom, my sister, we all drove there and at the end of it, like when we finished paying, it was another $1,300 just for dress alterations?
Speaker 2:No way, yes, yes, which you didn't account for which?
Speaker 1:I didn't account for. God bless my mother. She paid for it because she was kind of like oh, anything that entails an address, and I remember just being like oh my gosh, I feel so bad, Sorry mom, I went over budget, sorry mom, I love you so much.
Speaker 1:But it's just, I mean I didn't really have an option. I didn't want to get a smaller one and then have to try and lose 10 pounds and hopefully it fits. So it was like I had to do the bigger size. And then I think, with my train alone for the bustle, that was $300 of it, cause I had 12 different points on my dress to bustle it. And then that's another cost that I was like kind of annoyed about. That we ended up spending because the day of the wedding comes and we're done with the bridal photos, and so they're like, okay, let's go in the bridal suite, we'll bustle the dress and then we'll do grand entrance. And I'm like, okay, cool, my husband's like best friend is like blasting music and like we're trying to obviously like have fun.
Speaker 1:And my sister's getting so frustrated because if you've gotten married yet or if you don't, or if you're about to, please practice the bustle. Because it was us 10 minutes 10 to 15 minutes trying to get it to bustle. And my sister's just like I can't think. Everyone's like screaming and being loud and, um, our accordion comes in and she's like, hey, not a big deal, but we're like just running 20 minutes behind and I just said F it. I was like let's just go, you know, we'll figure it out.
Speaker 1:So I came out and my grand entrance and did my first dance without a bustle and I was kind of holding the train, so just something you didn't like think about what happened. Like happened the day of the wedding, yep, and I remember I was about to do my uh dance with my dad and my photographer. She was like why didn't you just tell me? She's like I know how to bustle it her. And the photographer bustled it in two seconds. And I'm like, yeah, I wish I would have said that earlier. But you know what? It was all good.
Speaker 2:So, so bustling, let's talk bustling advice when you were at your last alteration appointment video record record. Video record your alterations person. Who put those bustles together? Record them bustling your dress that way on wedding day. Whoever is in charge of that bustle, they have it on camera.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's funny because we did do that and we had the video. But, like, if you're the one bustling the day, the snow hates my sister. I love you so much. Um, but um, maybe watch it a few times, you know, during the leading up to the week before, watch it a few times so you can get an idea. I mean, some bustles are easy and people just do the one bustle and you're good. But if you have like a more intricate one, please spend time learning how to do it, cause that was one thing that was kind of a bummer, but it didn't kill the day, but it was just something that came up that you don't think of.
Speaker 2:I think 12 is the most I've ever bustled.
Speaker 1:I think mine was like 15. Yeah, it was insane, but it's just. Yeah, it's all good, but it's it's something that happened and um that the wedding dress alterations was a big cost.
Speaker 2:I did not think of. So let's go back and talk about parties, because I have actually a personal story. Okay, I've not been given permission to share this story, but I think we're so exiled from this bride that I don't really care. Okay, so my sister-in-law was in a wedding and we were all friends of the bride. In a sense, it was like the family community is friends with bride. We talked about her wedding leading up to her wedding day for months and months on end. How's the planning going? How's this going? How's that going?
Speaker 2:My sister-in-law was one of her bridesmaids. So my sister-in-law calls me one day and she goes. I don't know what to do and I'm like what is the issue? And she says the bride is planned her bachelorette trip to Hawaii for 10 days and is expecting me to upfront the cost of the airfare, the split, hotel and there's all these excursions we're doing. I've told her I can't afford this trip and she has said if I'm not willing to go, then I'm kicked out of her bridal party. What do I do? I'd be like, well, it was nice knowing you.
Speaker 1:And I said I don't know how to tell you how to pay for 10 days in Hawaii.
Speaker 2:You can't donate enough plasma in the next three.
Speaker 1:You don't have enough time to donate enough plasma in the meantime.
Speaker 2:Yeah, your body will run out of blood.
Speaker 1:I literally I don't. I haven't even gone on that nice of a vacation with my husband, let alone someone's bachelorette party.
Speaker 2:So she had to kindly decline and I said I don't know what to tell you besides like no, and she goes I've already paid for the dress, I've put in money towards, like the engagement party and I'm like that's kind of weird because usually bridesmaids don't pay for the engagement party. But whatever, I just like completely let that one go out in one ear, out the other. But we she got like uninvited to the wedding and then we got an uninvited like we were not allowed at this wedding because she refused. So let's talk about bridal party, bridal party financial expectations and honestly, don't be such a bridezilla that you uninvite people to your wedding with like a formal invitation If you are going to be that level of a bridezilla, take a deep breath, step back and think again.
Speaker 1:I'm very if she was to do that and be like hey guys, I'm okay with that, but she shouldn't be upset if people don't come. Correct, does that make sense? Yes, like she can be like hey, I'm planning my bachelorette party in Hawaii, blah blah. If you can't come, it's all good. If you want to go that extravagant, then you should be mindful that people are going to decline.
Speaker 2:And if you and I don't, and if the expectation that everybody shows up, then you need to cover some of those costs I'd be like, if you, if you want to pay for me, love to come, but it shouldn't be.
Speaker 1:That's insane. 10 years in hawaii yeah, I'm just still mind blown by that bridal party so we are talking everything from the be my bridesmaid yes. Cute invitation the proposal bag.
Speaker 2:We are talking dresses. We are talking matching pajamas, because those are a thing. We're talking parties, you name it. Let's talk bridal party. How did you navigate that with your bridal party?
Speaker 1:So thankfully we did siblings and then one friend, so it definitely was easier on the side to ask for them to pay for their stuff. Um, as when it comes to dresses, shoes, hair, makeup, day of um and then bachelorette party, they I mean everyone's gonna have their own opinion. My opinion was, you know, if I'm asking you to be in my bridal party, it was kind of also like ask them but then also like, hey, there's gonna be the cost on your end of dresses and all that good stuff. But I think it's more easy to ask for your bridesmaids to pay for stuff if you give them enough time. I think that's where it gets really like misconstrued and like toxic and like, oh, you're making me pay for all this stuff. But I asked my bridesmaids, I think over a year in advance.
Speaker 1:Thankfully we booked our venue so early and I already knew, like my siblings and then my one friend, that I wanted to ask um and I was very quick with booking, like hair and makeup, sending them what dresses, what shoes, um, and just constantly being in a text thread of like, hey guys, you know, reminder um, if you guys have like a great work week or something or you have a you know extra paycheck and you feel comfortable, you want to send me money, then that's how I navigated it. And then, when it came to Bachelorette Party and Bachelor Party, we actually did a joint one, so it was definitely on the cheaper side in my opinion. And we just drove down to Rocky Point and we rented a beach house and everyone paid their way as well. So that was. But then I did you know the proposal boxes.
Speaker 1:I gave everyone bags at the bachelorette party. I got everyone gifts, I got everyone the matching pajamas. So there was stuff that I paid for as well. But that's kind of my opinion and how I feel about it and how I also went about it when I had my bridal party.
Speaker 2:So- Nice, I love it.
Speaker 1:What do you think, what's your opinion on like-?
Speaker 2:I think if you give them enough time, they can be responsible for hair makeup, dresses, dress alterations, because even bridesmaids' dresses need to be altered. Sometimes I was in a wedding and mine needed to be altered, so I get it. That's a cost, but it's the gratitude, it's those gifts that you gave that said thank you for being part of this. Depending on your location I mean, we're so lucky here in the Valley because we go South, you have Mexico, you go North, you have Vegas, you go West you have.
Speaker 2:California, so there's plenty of like local things. Um. I've also seen really cute, uh, bachelorette parties where people book an airbnb, um, and you know a town over popular yep or um up north in the mountains and the girls just want to hike and have fun. So you don't have to have a traditional bachelor party where you're walling out and um the Chippendale strippers show up.
Speaker 1:You can do it however you want. Yeah, actually, we need to talk about that. We need to talk about that. Your girls want it. Yeah, what part? Okay, what do you think? So there's always like, let's be real, we all know there's a lingering joke of like it's and the guy should go to strip clubs. What do you think about that? Ooh, Is it a yes or no?
Speaker 2:I think, wow, you hit me with a good one. Do you want me to get my opinion? No, I. If there is trust built in this relationship and you can trust your partner to be able to go into a strip club, have fun, throw some dollars. You know, infidelity isn't a situation that you guys are concerned about, have been faced with in your relationship. Go, have fun because there is that confidence in that relationship. If that is a boundary within the relationship and that line has potentially been crossed, if it's with actual cheating, if it's with sliding into the wrong person's DM, if there has been previous flirting, if it's with sliding into the wrong person's DM if there has been previous flirting, I would not even entertain the conversation because it is a tiny crack in the door that can lead to so much disaster. And why get that close to it? Don't get that close to the line if that line is going to cause a catastrophic result. So that's my opinion.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Mine's a little opposite. I'm completely anti-strip club. I would even go as far as to say I was like if you go, then it's not going to happen. Like I'm, I I don't know. I just don't see the point in going Like if I love someone and I want that with them, why would I want to see anyone like else? Like that? You know, and I know some people are like who cares? It's a strip club and I don't know who cares. Like I love my wife or I love my, and that's totally fine. Who cares Like I love my wife or I love my, and that's totally fine. I'm just completely opposite, Cause I know he would be upset if I went to one and then I know I would be very upset if he went to one.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I think it's just, and it's not that we don't have trust or like anything between each other, but it's just like the.
Speaker 2:I don't see the point Right If that makes sense, if that's a discussion that you've had and that's like a safeguard you've put into place, there it is. It's an easy one. Don't even entertain it, exactly so that's mine.
Speaker 1:I like it. I know me too.
Speaker 2:All right you want some of the breakdown of the costs.
Speaker 1:I do. I think people would like to hear that.
Speaker 2:Okay, so here's a rough estimate of breaking down your cost. So 45% should be going to venue catering rentals. Five to 15% is your planner slash coordinator. 12% of your budget should be going to photo and video. 10% is your music entertainment. 10% is florals and decor entertainment. 10 is florals and decor. Six percent is your miscellaneous items your stationery, cake favors, anything miscellaneous. This does not go into the space of those more costs that we were talking about earlier. This is a actual, we are writing this into our budget. And then nine percent is wedding attire oh, that's true.
Speaker 1:I mean just like, mean, just like I said, yes, alterations, and I mean, and when we were looking for his suit, oh my gosh, I mean we didn't spend that much. But when we went to other shops it's like, oh, custom, off the bat's a thousand, I'm like, oh my gosh, I think that was another cost that we didn't even think about. Like we knew his would be, you know, of course, expensive, but I was like shocked to see that, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:So, because everything is so expensive, we have some tips on how to save. Yes, we do so. First tip for savings is look for an all-inclusive. That is your venue. It can have everything, including your tables, your chairs, your DJ, your in-house catering, your bartending, your cake. It could include decor and florals. It might not. Every all-inclusive is different, so check out what's available in your area to look for some of those all-inclusive packages.
Speaker 1:Is that what you said? You and John did, yes, yes, all-inclusive package. We took some things off and like switch some things out, but I think that's just the way to go with the wedding venues. I know a lot of times when we were planning I was feeling I felt less stressed because I knew some of those things were already taken care of, like already giving vendors for, like catering and things like that. And then, of course, there's the outside costs of photographers, videographers and flowers and things like that. So I think, when it comes to what you should spend and not spend your money on, do you have like what you should and what you shouldn't spend your money on? Like one of each, like what's the? What do you think is the most top priority, and one that's like we don't even need to spend money on that?
Speaker 2:I think every couple is different just because the vision is different. I think something that is so worth spending money on. Let's move the big pieces, the venue, let's move catering. Let's move wedding dress. Those are big like no brainers. Something worth spending good money on is a good photographer. I 100% agree. Photographer is who's going to capture those pictures forever and ever and ever. You do not want to spend money on a brand new photographer somebody who's up in you know an aspiring wedding photographer to be.
Speaker 2:You want a quality wedding photographer, then you obviously you want it to match your style. Your vibe what you're going for. People do talk about food, so make sure you have good food at your wedding. Your vibe what you're going for. People do talk about food, so make sure you have good food at your wedding. We want good wedding food Everyone, please. We're begging. Nobody wants to be bloated, literally yes, because you had crap wedding food.
Speaker 1:I know I think that's a big like. That was something that was important to me was the food, but it's funny because we, literally, leading up to our wedding, every meeting we had, we said we want to eat our wedding food. Everyone always says you never eat your wedding food. The bride and groom I feel like everyone's heard that. I kept hearing that the day of the wedding comes, we sit down. They serve us first, obviously with the bride and groom.
Speaker 1:Photographer and videographer come up maybe a minute later. Hey guys, if you want sunset photos and video, we gotta go now. And we just look at each other and I said, can I eat two bites? And so we ate, went and did the photos, came back and the catering staff was amazing. They're like, oh, we're so sorry we didn't realize you guys were leaving right away. We can get you fresh plates. And I'm like, oh, no, it's fine, because then it's so. Then did you eat? No, I. And I'm like, oh, no, it's fine, cause then it's so. Then did you eat? No, I think I ate a shrimp and then like a roll and that was it. And it was funny, but you know cause it's the next thing, you know? Okay, now it's time for, for a dance with your dad, and then it's time for, and then let's start the reception.
Speaker 2:So I'm a psycho and I make couples eat because I know how much alcohol is going into their system Literally. And the last thing I want is a vomiting bride. So I am a crazy one. I'm like here I'll spoon feed you. You're like, please eat. I'll stand at the table and be like shoo shoo. My family members who keep coming over. I need them to eat.
Speaker 1:Everyone comes up to you and wants to talk to you and then it's just like, okay, which you know you get, but, um, I think that's that's something else. I um heard another bride talk about that I was listening to and, um, she's like we loved that. Everyone kept coming up to us, you know, because they want to say like congratulations, but she was. There was a certain point where we're like, can you guys like get the vibe, like we want to just sit for a second, like by ourselves, we want to enjoy our food, you know. So, as I think a tip for guests, be mindful also of the bride and groom on the day of the wedding. We know you want to see us and talk to us. There's hours and you know the entire hours of the wedding that you can talk to them, give them a second to eat and just and just come down to earth like have a second. You know, half the time it's us taking photos and for the last hour our feet hurt. We just want to sit for a second.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, and if your venue allows it and has a safe space, feel free to have your planner or your coordinator pencil in private dinner. I have put in private dinner for couples multiple times. I had one bride who gets very overstimulated very easily and she said I won't eat because everybody's going to overwhelm me and then I'm not going to be hungry.
Speaker 2:So we put it in the timeline that they were eating away from the main reception space. We tucked them away. They ate. She was happy, they got to take a breather and then they came back out and joined the party. So another tip to savings is DIY decor and florals. So if your venue allows it, wherever you're getting married at, you're welcome to DIY your florals. Things that are great is Costco has amazing florals, trader Joe's has another great floral option. So DIY your florals. That's fun. As far as decor goes, check out those Facebook groups in your area. I know Arizona has AZ Bright to be there constantly begging people, begging people to take their stuff.
Speaker 2:Candles, welcome signs, seating charts you name it. They use it. They don't want it to be stored in their garage for the next 10 years.
Speaker 1:We have so many candle bases Correct. It's like insane.
Speaker 2:So DIY those things. Amazon is great If you have an Ikea near you. Ikea has great things, so DIY that. The other tip is to drop your guest count. That does save you a lot.
Speaker 1:It saves you so much money. It saves you so much.
Speaker 2:Because here are the numbers. If you invite 250 people to your wedding and the average food cost is $80 per plate per person, that is $20,000 in dinner.
Speaker 1:That's insane In just food, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:So how much do you love all 250 of those people Do?
Speaker 1:people still have that big of weddings. Do you feel like, oh yeah, okay, I feel like I've seen more like 150 and under, but my sister's wedding was like 250, but she got married in 2012 and everything was way cheaper back then.
Speaker 2:very, large weddings are still a thing you know. Three to four hundred people I've married into the Hispanic culture when I attend weddings there you're there partying all night.
Speaker 1:There are so many people, so many, and I'm like where's, where is she?
Speaker 2:Who's even getting married here? No, literally, because there's so many people they love. Yeah, so it's a real thing, the family culture. But down that. And then the last piece of advice is find the happy middle between your expectation and your budget.
Speaker 1:I love that Because I think society has made it so just so bad with like your wedding has to be the most extravagant thing you need to spend a million dollars.
Speaker 1:Social media has just like killed it. And then these um, I'm going to do some facts in a second about some celebrity weddings. I feel like those two. You see the Hailey Bieber weddings and you know all this and and make, and then it makes you bummed. It's like, oh, wow, I wish my wedding was like that. It doesn't have to be like that.
Speaker 1:I was actually thinking about this the other day. There could have been like a clown at my wedding and I probably wouldn't have noticed, because you're so focused on just your husband and having a good time, like I don't even. I feel like I don't even remember sitting at my sweetheart table. I couldn't even tell you what was on it if I didn't plan it. I mean, I have the pictures, but it's really, of course, plan your day how you want and make it the perfect and most amazing day ever, but don't stress over every single little detail, because it's at the end of the day, what matters most is you and your husband getting married or husband and wife and whoever and having having your friends, family, um, and just bringing that together and enjoying your time together, and that's all that matters in my opinion.
Speaker 1:So, but I thought it'd be fun to do. Do a little average wedding um cost and some fun facts. Um so in America today. We actually asked on our Instagram a few weeks ago what the average wedding cost was in Arizona. But I think it's pretty much in general and how much do you think it was like in America Today?
Speaker 2:I kind of know this answer. Okay, that's fine. Is it $33,000?
Speaker 1:Yes, $33,000. Yeah, which I was thinking about it, and I think I mean not to you, but I'm pretty sure I spent about, like with everything, about $33,000 on our wedding, yep, which is like insane to think about.
Speaker 2:It's like crazy. I have people who want a smaller budget than that. Yeah, and it's doable.
Speaker 1:I was going to say do you feel?
Speaker 2:like it's doable. $33,000 is pretty typical.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so, and that's like an average, like normal, nothing like Hailey Bieber or anything like that, nothing crazy. And then the average dress cost like a wedding dress. How much do you think?
Speaker 2:Ooh, $2,500. Mm-hmm, is it really? Yeah,500, is it? Really, yeah, I was gonna say 3,000, but then I felt like that was maybe too high.
Speaker 1:I know, yeah, the 20, yeah 2,500, and I would I would say I feel like I feel like I keep bringing myself up. Obviously just got married, but I think mine was like 2,500. Okay, but then the extra thank you so much. But then the extra add on for the alterations made it almost 4,000. So just think about that too. And then some fun like celebrity things. Obviously we know the celebrities go all out for their weddings. Who do you think has the most expensive engagement ring and how much do you think it costs?
Speaker 2:are they still currently married? I think so. Yes, I was gonna say jennifer lopez, but I don't think she's.
Speaker 1:We said and they're done that is no more like the fifth time, so sorry jlo sorry j-lo, sorry j-lo um benefers over and is it hayley beaver?
Speaker 2:no is it a?
Speaker 1:kardashian? No, I'm surprised. Actually it's not a kardashian, because they like go all out. Yeah, um, I have no idea.
Speaker 2:It's mariah carey and her wedding ring costs 10 million dollars okay, I guess that's what happens when you sing the Christmas anthem. I know, I know it is Okay, one sec.
Speaker 1:Who do you think has the most expensive wedding wedding like all together, like a celebrity couple is it an indian couple? No, I think it is like realistically, like because they have like over. I think there was a jonas brother no, okay, um, I'll give you one more guess. You were talking about them earlier, is it? It a Kardashian?
Speaker 2:Yes, Was it Kim? Yes.
Speaker 1:Who did she marry? It was when she married Kanye.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1:We said okay, we said yep, and theirs came out to $2.8 million. That's how much their wedding costs. Yes, I think they got well. Actually. I mean, do you watch the Kardashians at all? I haven't in a long time. Oh, okay, like, if anyone watches the Kardashians, you know the Kim and Kourtney debacle of like she got married in Italy and then she got married in Italy, that whole thing. So I'm not surprised. I know they did Italy and it looked super bougie. So, okay, okay. And last one, the most expensive wedding dress in the celebrity world.
Speaker 2:The most expensive wedding dress in the celebrity world. Oh, it was like do I have to guess how much it was, or do I have to guess the celebrity you can?
Speaker 1:whichever one, if you want to do yeah, If you want to guess how much, how much do you think we'll switch it up? How much do you think like the most expensive? Half a million 3.5 million.
Speaker 2:Who the heck? I said who am I?
Speaker 1:I'm crying over here over 4,000. Like what? Yeah, 3.5 million. And it was Serena Williams. Oh, okay, yep, yep, good for her. I know, I love that for her. I couldn't, I don't even like spending $30 on a t-shirt so. I mean, hey, she said you know what we said, you know what? Hell yeah.
Speaker 2:Go.
Speaker 1:Serena, I know Jeez. I mean, I guess I wish I could spend 3.5 million, but that's just like I'm like happy for her.
Speaker 2:I know I'm honestly kind of jealous I can't even be pissed Like she freaking deserved it. So you know what Do your thing, Serena.
Speaker 1:You know what? You spend $3.5 million on the checks you go get it girl. I love that. Oh my gosh, that's so funny.
Speaker 2:Awesome, okay, well, do you have?
Speaker 1:anything else for today? I do have one more thing, okay.
Speaker 2:How do you feel? I know we talked a little bit, but how do you feel about like the traditions of weddings and like paying and costs like that? How do you think? I think it's so funny because the reason, the history behind it is the dowry is the gift that the bride's parents would pay to the couple. So if that's them paying for the wedding, if that was historically giving them land or a house or animals, that was how the bride's family covered the cost. So that's why today we see this tradition of the bride's family pays for all of this stuff because of the history of the dowry there was also a thing called the bride price and that was where the groom, the bride's family, would either give money, land, animal or service to the bride's family for the groom to marry the bride. Even back to, if the groom didn't come from money, he would have to provide like service on their land, like as a servant.
Speaker 2:Yes, they said he better put in that work Correct. So that was what the bride price was, and then the dowry just some fun facts. So that's why the history of the bride's family pays for it is because-.
Speaker 1:It's getting Bridgerton.
Speaker 2:Yes, and super interesting, this is actually still happening in today's world, in other cultures. Oh, like that same tradition. Correct, so the bride price and the dowry is still something that many cultures still do to this day, so we will be respectful of those cultures. That's awesome and that is still a thing Wow, super cool, but I would not advise it in America because that is not something we do. So, please, if somebody's offering a goat for you for your marriage, send us a DM. Let's not do that.
Speaker 1:We're not going to be doing that today, so not here in America.
Speaker 2:No. So, but respect the other cultures that do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's awesome.
Speaker 2:Well, awesome. We have some really exciting episodes coming up. We have some phenomenal guests, so be sure to join us on the next episode of the Wedding Hive, bringing you the tea and all the buzz in the wedding world. And don't forget to like, comment, comment and subscribe.