Wedding Hive Podcast
Giving you the tea and ALL the buzz in the wedding world! New episodes every Wednesday!
Wedding Hive Podcast
Habits For A Healthy Marriage
After 12 years of marriage filled with highs and lows, I'm sharing valuable insights to help strengthen your relationship. Good communication and learning to fight in healthy ways are essential for building a lasting partnership.
• Communication is crucial - healthy marriages don't avoid conflict but work through it constructively
• Use "I statements" instead of blame and listen to understand rather than respond
• Avoid serious discussions when hungry, angry, lonely or tired - table issues after 10pm if needed
• Keep date nights alive with intentional, scheduled time together even if it's at home
• Share household responsibilities to create a balanced partnership
• Consider therapy during difficult seasons - it shows commitment to growth, not failure
• Remember you chose each other and you're on the same team through all of life's changes
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Hey Queens, welcome back to another episode of the Daily Buzz. So this episode, I have felt, is such an important topic for us to sit down and discuss, so let's just act like we are sitting together at a coffee shop having a very raw conversation. As you know, I have been married for 12 years and these 12 years have not been easy. We have definitely had many highs and many lows. Years have not been easy. We have definitely had many highs and many lows, um, but I just think it's so important to share some of our wins, um, as a marriage, but also give you some really good tips and advice as you are stepping into this journey as a wife, um, or husband, to be so um.
Speaker 0:First and foremost, communication is so, so important. Healthy marriages don't avoid conflict. They learn how to work through it constructively. If you learn how to fight healthy which sounds so crazy, but learning how to have healthy fights, you two are one team will change the way that you communicate and you have those discussions. In the end, like I said, you guys are, you are one, and the goal is for those conversations to end with a good resolution, not end with some type of a separation. So practice daily check-ins, just spend 10 minutes.
Speaker 0:How was your day? How are you feeling? Different things like using I statements instead of blaming. When you say things like I feel overwhelmed when X, y and Z versus you need help because you're driving me nuts and you are causing X, y and Z See I statements. I statements are huge. Another thing is you want to make sure that you listen, to understand, not to respond. Reflect on what you hear and clarify to diffuse any type of tension. Another thing is I would avoid any big conversations when you are hungry, angry, lonely or tired. We have a rule in our marriage we do not fight after 10 PM because the reality is we are up so early in the day and we are running so hard by 10 pm. If you think we are going to solve any type of issue or fight after 10 o'clock, you are absolutely nuts because we are both tired and neither of us can think straight. Not that you know. There's that old saying don't go to bed angry. We go to bed and we table it, so after a good night's sleep, we can come back together and have a good conversation.
Speaker 0:Another tip is to keep your date nights alive. Date nights for us have always looked so different because of the season of life that we have been in, but making it intentional. Schedule time together, if that's weekly or biweekly, even if it's at home, after the kids go to sleep, if you're able to and you one day are in that season of life where you are raising kiddos, try to trade babysitting with trusted friends or, like I said, after they go to sleep just that intentional time together. You can do things like taking walks, watching a movie, go do fun things mini golf, skate, date game night mix it up and maybe those are great times to also have those deeper conversations. So another tip is to have practical partnership and sharing in some of the roles. Here in 2025, we have learned that it is pretty rare that we have one person in the home fully, and if that works for your family, that is incredible good for you. But when you're dividing the role inside and outside of the house, it really helps to share some of those loads. So if that means that one person makes dinner, the other person cleans it up, how you end up, you know deciding who does laundry and who does the house cleaning that will help as well. This next one is become more popular since covid, and I'm so grateful for that, and that is therapy.
Speaker 0:If you and your spouse have hit a wall and there is some deeper conversation that needs to be had, I would highly advise a therapist. Every couple hits hard seasons. Therapists do not mean that you're failing. It shows the commitment to healing and growth. So, like I said, some of those times to consider therapy is when there's reoccurring fights that never get resolved.
Speaker 0:There is any type of emotional or physical intimacy issues, resentment or avoidance is creeping in, and then big life transformations kids, job change, grief, et cetera. There are lots of different types of therapy. Make sure that you find a trusted therapist. This might mean you need to do couples therapy, maybe some individual therapy. Any type of therapist that is a licensed therapist will be the one to be able to sit down, pull the curtains back and decide what is good for that. So the last thing that I would advise is just to continue to remember. Like I said in the beginning, you two chose each other to be partners here in this marriage. Like I said, you chose this person. This is your other half for the rest of your life. So remember, you guys are on one team. Seasons change, life changes, but the two of you just continue to work together, have that healthy communication and that is your daily buzz.