#621 Master Leadership Communication with the Relationship GPS Model with Laura Watson

Is your leadership communication building trust—or quietly eroding it?

In this insightful episode of Talking with the Experts, host Rose Davidson is joined by veteran business coach Laura Watson, who reveals how the quality of your communication determines the quality of your relationships—both in business and in life.

Laura introduces her powerful Relationship GPS model, a practical communication framework that helps leaders navigate their conversations with clarity, intention, and empathy. Whether you're managing a team, nurturing a partnership, or leading clients, knowing which communication skills to use (and when) is the secret to long-term relational success.

Here’s what we cover in this episode:

• What the Relationship GPS is and how it can transform the way you communicate.
• How to identify the “zone” of a relationship and tailor your communication accordingly.
• Why positive feedback is essential to building connection, motivation, and trust.
• How leaders often default to the wrong communication approach and how to shift for better results.

Laura also shares practical tips to:

• Strengthen emotional intelligence and self-awareness in high-stress situations.
• Use feedback as a leadership tool rather than a checkbox.
• Improve team culture by being present, honest, and strategic in how you communicate.

What makes Laura’s approach unique is her whole-person coaching philosophy—she knows that leaders don’t leave their personal struggles at the door. From business growth to navigating infidelity, addiction, or parenting challenges, she helps people communicate with courage, compassion, and clarity.

Whether you're an emerging entrepreneur or a seasoned executive, Laura’s insights will help you lead with your words and connect with your people on a whole new level.

🎧 Tune in now and transform your communication—one relationship at a time.

🔗 CONNECT WITH LAURA

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurawatson/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/laurawatsons/

Website: https://venturecoaching.ca/

📌 PROMOTION: https://venturecoaching.ca/free-stuff.html

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Transcript

Intro | 00:01
Welcome to Talking With The Experts. Here we discuss all things business. By business owners. For business owners. Here is your host, Rose Davidson. 

 Rose | 00:12
Hello and welcome to Talking with the Experts. I'm your host, Rose Davidson from rosedavidson.com.au. 
 Yeah. My next guest is Laura Watson, and we're going to be talking about how the quality of our communication determines the quality of our relationships, both in business and on a personal level. Now, Laura is the founder and lead business coach at Venture Coaching International in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. With over 25 years of counselling and coaching experience, she helps business owners and executives across North America to improve their personal communication and leadership effectiveness. Her secret sauce... Is helping people bridge theory to practice. She takes challenging business, leadership and communication concepts and breaks them down into practical and usable ideas and action steps. Laura is a whole person coach. Laura knows that business leaders are people first who wrestle with all sorts of issues. She not only helps people on the business side, but helps them on their personal side as well. It's a common occurrence for Laura to discuss business issues one day and be discussing addictions, parenting and infidelity on the next day. And just a little fun fact about Laura, when she's not in the boardroom, I'm hoping owners and CEOs, you'll find her in the ballroom training for her next country dance competition. Laura, welcome to Talking With The Experts. It's such a pleasure to meet you. 

 Laura | 01:46
Thanks for having me here today, Rose. I really appreciate it. 

 Rose | 01:50
What an impressive resume and the ballroom dancing sounds quite intriguing. 

 Laura | 01:55
It's a ton of fun. Absolutely. I always wanted to dance. Didn't marry a dancer. And just decided one day you know what if I'm going to do this I'm going to do this so yeah I've been dancing probably about 13-14 years started off in ballroom then a friend asked me to join him in some country dancing and so we trained really hard and we were really excited to actually win a world championship in 2023. Wow, thanks. 

 Rose | 02:26
It's exciting. Laura, congratulations. We're talking about communication in business and in our personal lives. What is a relationship GPS? 

 Laura | 02:39
Great question. Yeah, you know, talking about communication is one of my passions. I actually, I did not grow up in a home with great communicators, and it really became a big thing. Issue of not issue, but it came became more prominent for myself when I had my children and just realized, you know what, I really want to have strong relationships with my children. And that's when I discovered a model called parent effectiveness training or PET, which is all communication skills. And there's a sister model called LET, which is leader effectiveness training. Found it, loved the material and actually got certified in that program. 
 So what a relationship GPS is, it's about understanding that when we're in relationship with another person, there's. Different zones or things happening in that relationship, if you will. 
 So for example, if I'm talking about a relationship between you and I right now, everything is good between you and I, we're having a great conversation. So we would be in what's called the no problem zone. Of the GPS. And that means that, you know, my needs are getting met, your needs are getting met, good communication is happening, and good work is happening. But there's other zones that show up in relationship between the two people. 
 Sometimes, you might come to the relationship or come to the conversation owning a problem of some kind. Something's not going on well in your world. You're having an issue with a colleague. You're having an issue with your young person. And so what we call that zone is the you own a problem zone. 
 And then we might come to conversation. Be in relationship together and be in communication from the perspective where something's awry in my world. And, you know, maybe you've done something that has stopped me from getting my needs met. And so now we're in the I own a problem zone of our relationship. And so this GPS is important because Where we are in our relationship with each other determines the communication skills that are appropriate to use at that time, so that, and the communication skills that are appropriate to use at that time. Communication skills are important because they can make or break the relationship. 
 So it's really important that we know our zone. And then we bring the appropriate skills to the table based on the zone that we're in so that we can build and strengthen our relationships versus damage them. Hopefully that makes some sense. 

 Rose | 05:35
Yeah, absolutely. No, absolutely. But what makes a great communicator, Laura? 
 I mean, we all have conversations with people.- We are having one at the moment. But what makes a good communicator? What are the skills? Need to be brought to the table to make a great communicator. 

 Laura | 05:56
Great question. And lots of people think, well, I have to know how to enunciate properly. I need to know how to share my thoughts appropriately. And actually, one of the strongest communication skills we need to learn and practice is listening. And, you know, I've been a coach and counselor now for 25 plus years. And that's really the strongest skill I bring to the table is my listening skills. And I bring my listening skills to the table from the perspective of seeking to understand. 
 So the seeking to understand the other person. So many of us come to conversation and approach the communication from the perspective of trying to get our point across. They need to understand me and what I want to see happen. And that often causes breakdowns. 
 So what we actually need to do is show up from a place of seeking to understand the other first. And we do that through our listening skills, really hearing what that other person is sharing and realizing that even when a person is sharing, they're often not sharing what's real for them. It's they're sharing kind of Clues, if you will, to what might be going on for them. And as a good listener, our job is to try to hear the message underneath the clues and then. Paraphrase that message back in a skill called active listening, because that's how we demonstrate our understanding of the other person. And it's a very powerful gift when we can give people the gift of feeling heard and understood. 

 Rose | 07:44
Yeah, absolutely. 
 I mean, we were just talking before we were coming on was, you know, about the world situation. And I think if there is more active listening, I think their world would be a lot better place at the moment. I can guarantee that. However, active learning is not something that is inherent in all of us. How can we learn more active in our listening? 

 Laura | 08:14
You're right. I mean, active listening is a very powerful skill. Excuse me. And it's a skill when people are first learning feels awkward and it can be a little bit challenging and people will often say, this doesn't work and just drop it. And I really invite people to try to. Push through the awkwardness of it in the beginning because it's so powerful. 
 So active listening really is about paraphrasing what we're hearing from another person, because what happens is a person, let's say person A is communicating something. Person B, what happens is that communication comes across the airwaves, if you will, over to person B, but It's not just coming to person B, it's coming through person B's filters of the world, and their perspective, and their stories about the world. And so sometimes what we hear or interpret someone is saying is not what they intended. And that's where a lot of communication breaks down is because we hear something from another person, We don't confirm our understanding of what we've just heard. We just run with our assumption or our perspective of what we've heard. And that's when conflicts happen really quickly. And sometimes we walk away like, how did that happen? 
 Well, it happened because we weren't listening. In the first place. 
 So active listening really is a paraphrasing of what our interpretation is of the other person, of what the other person is saying. And ideally, it's an interpretation of not just what they're saying, but how they're feeling. 
 So someone may, an active listening can be done even if someone isn't saying words per se. For example, I'm sure we've all experienced someone walking through our house, maybe stomping their feet. Or slamming a door, And we know- something's up with so-and-so because that behavior is a clue. 
 So we have an opportunity to go and active listen. That behavior, we can go to that person and say, You seem really frustrated right now. Frustration might not be what they're actually feeling, but at least we're trying. To extend an olive branch and show that person we're trying to understand. And that person say, no, I'm not frustrated. Okay, well, you seem really angry. Yes, I'm angry. And they might start to ramble. 
 So they That's what active listening looks like. It's really about... Paraphrasing or reflecting back to the person we're interacting with, our experience or what we're hearing that they are thinking and feeling. 
 So that they can confirm or deny our interpretation. And if our interpretation is accurate, then they're going to feel heard and the conversation will continue. And if it's not accurate, they're likely to jump in and correct us and give us another chance to then demonstrate our listening and make and build the gap between us. 

 Rose | 11:41
Yeah, and I've often found too that paraphrasing someone can be a challenge for a lot of people because they don't want to appear less than or not understanding what's being said or feeling, you know, that they are a little bit. Not caught up with the whole conversation. How do we get around that? 

 Laura | 12:02
Yeah, I mean, it's a bit tricky because that's really our own awkwardness coming to the surface. So we have to, you know, give ourselves permission sometimes just to feel awkward and even share with the person that we're listening with too is like, you know what, I'm trying to understand you. We share our intentions. I'm trying to understand you right now. Here's what I'm hearing you say. Or here's how I'm experiencing you right now. And When we come at, when we approach it from that perspective, I find most people on the other side are very patient. And just really appreciate our attempt. It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be an attempt. 

 Rose | 12:45
Yeah, I think so. I think that's quite right. You've got to get out of your own way and just try and make the effort to... Be aligned with the other person, even if your viewpoints are poles apart. At least you are trying to make some effort to understand what the other person is thinking or feeling. 

 Laura | 13:09
Exactly. And it's just so powerful. 
 You know, as you shared at the beginning of our broadcast here, I work with small business owners and entrepreneurs. So these are people in leadership positions in their organizations. And I teach leadership. Pretty much every day, I think. I've got at least one session a day where we're working on communication skills. And yeah, these owners, it's not a skill that they grew up with. It's not something that they've learned yet. They feel awkward. And sometimes their awkwardness is coming from a place of they're hearing something from their direct report or from their colleague, and they think their colleague is wrong. 
 And then they want to get into proving their colleague wrong in order to make themselves right. And that creates a different dynamic between the two people. 
 So it really, it takes a bit of effort to be able to put our own agenda, our own fears and concerns and worries on hold enough to just try to. To practice the skill. But for my clients who do put it into practice, they eventually definitely get more comfortable with it. And they have much stronger relationships with their colleagues and with their teams because of it. 

 Rose | 14:30
And, you know, these things that we use in business, these communication skills, you know, they can be used in our personal life. And a lot of times communication. A lot of conflict, especially between family members happens because there has been some miscommunication or some misunderstanding of something. Has said all done. How can... Be better communicators in our personal life that can transfers into our business life. 

 Laura | 15:03
You're absolutely right. The skills are transferable, which is why I love working in this area so much because it helps in the office, but it helps at home. 
 So I'm often telling my clients, you know, this works with your spouse too. This works with your kids too. And, you know, And it's not just a trick that we're bringing to our communication skills that we're trying to apply. It really has to be grounded first in a philosophy of. Wanting to have a strong relationship with another person, you know, whether it's our colleague, whether it's our spouse, whether our kids, right? And So it's based on a philosophy of wanting strong relationships and a philosophy of realizing that We're all different. And that people see our spouse, our kids, our business partners see the world differently than we do. And I can't tell you how many times I've had conversations with my clients where I said, well, wait a minute, you know, people don't know what's going on in your head. And they said, what, really? They don't read minds. And I'm like, no, people can't read your mind. 
 So I'm We have to, first of all, approach the situation from I want to have a strong relationship with you. I understand you see the world differently. And I'm here to try to understand how you see the world. I don't have to agree with it. But I at least want to try to understand it. And if we can approach our relationships, personal and professional, from that grounding, then we're at a place where we're usually more willing to practice the communication skills, whether it's active listening or Whether it's sharing feedback with our kids or with our spouse or with a business partner in a way that helps them be open to hearing what we have to say when it comes our turn as well. 

 Rose | 17:14
And I think if we're always, you know, coming from a place of authenticity and integrity, I think, you know, It can only Bring about positive communication. 

 Laura | 17:27
Yeah, I think so too. Like this isn't a trick that we're trying to practice, We have to be, if we go back to this skill called active listening that we've been talking about, it has to be authentic. 
 So active listening is used best when, if we go back to that GPS we were talking about, it's used best when someone, the person we're communicating with is owning a problem of some kind. So for example, if you came to me with a challenge, then you're I would use my active listening skills with you to help you think through and try to solve your own problems. And that's coming from, and I'm doing that from a place of authenticity. I'm in a place mentally and emotionally where I can be present to you. I can be patient. If you and I were in a place in our relationship where I was frustrated with you, then it's going to be harder for me to show up and want to listen to you because I got my own stuff going on over here with me. 
 So We have to be aware of ourselves and where we're at mentally and emotionally so that we can bring the right skills to the table at the right time. Because if we can't be in an authentic place at that moment, Then it's probably better that we kind of take a time out and revisit the situation at a time when we're in a better mental and emotional place. 

 Rose | 19:08
Absolutely. Now I want to talk about Feedback. Now, listening is all very great. But a part of that process, I think, too, is giving feedback. Whether it is positive or negative, but negative obviously has to be constructive. Finger pointing and yelling and all that sort of horrible stuff. 
 So why is... Sharing positive feedback is so important for building relationships. 

 Laura | 19:37
Great question. And it's something that most people forget to do. 
 You know, that's relationship GPS we were referring to at the beginning when I model that out for people it actually looks like a rectangle like and I call it a behavior window and it has three zones. It has the I own a problem zone at the bottom, it has the no problem zone in the beginning where everything's great, and then it has the other person owns a problem zone at the top. And giving positive feedback is... Expands the size of the no problem zone in our relationships, because that's where we want to be in our relationships most of the time. The other way I explain it to people is it's like giving positive feedback is like, making deposits in your relationship bank account. It builds and strengthens the... Relationship. It helps the people we're interacting with feel acknowledged, feel appreciated, feel understood. 
 So we're putting deposits in the bank account so that... When it comes time when we may have to deliver some constructive feedback, if we've built the balance in the bank account high enough, then we're more likely to have an experience where the person we're delivering feedback to is going to be more open to hearing constructive feedback because there's already a strong relationship between the two of us. Does that make sense? 

 Rose | 21:14
Yeah, I think it's important to, you know, use language skills that the other person understands. You're not using jargon that they don't understand. You're not using, you know, hard words if they you know the vocabulary is just not there and you're trying to make yourself out to be you know higher and mightier than the person that you're providing the feedback to but feedback is a two-way street. 
 You know, if you're a business leader and you're giving feedback to someone on your team, you know, they should be conversely allowed to give that feedback. Back to you in some form that is in a positive way. 

 Laura | 21:56
Absolutely. And unfortunately, in a lot of organizations, Big and small, the feedback direction tends to be one way. It comes from the leader or the manager down. And I think a really strong culture is about feedback being a two-way street. 
 Yeah, because my clients, of course, are our leaders. And they one of the reasons why they hire coaches is because they kind of got there at a level in their organization where they're not getting feedback, because maybe the culture isn't that two way street. And so they're As a leader, they're wandering around in a feedback vacuum with blinders on, not knowing the impact that they are having on the world of the people around them. 
 So in a really... Constructive and mature and in culture in an organization? Absolutely. The feedback conversations should definitely be two-way. 

 Rose | 23:03
Absolutely. In your ideal world, Laura, what would be a good way to communicate? In an ideal world. 

 Laura | 23:15
And. That's such a broad question. In an ideal world, When we're communicating, we... Let's talk about the positive feedback, for example, because so many people forget to do it. We want to focus, first of all, on behavior. And not our judgment of behavior. And we want to be specific in our feedback. 
 So for example, we can say, good job. To someone and they're like, okay. Or we can say, you know, when you delivered that report to me early, so that's when we describe the behavior. I really appreciated receiving that report early because it gave me enough time to review the report before I had to deliver it to the board meeting. That's a very different form of communication. What that in that, form of communication, what's happened is the person delivering the communication is used what's called an I message, which is I really appreciated it when. 
 So they've communicated a feeling, which is appreciation. They've communicated behavior when you delivered the report early. 
 And then they've shared the impact that behavior had on them. I was able to review the report and feel prepared for my board meetings. 
 So in an ideal world, that's how we would communicate is we would use I messages, we would describe behavior, we would describe the impact of the behavior on us and our feeling about it and be very specific. And that just makes a huge world of difference for the receiver of that communication. 

 Rose | 25:09
Absolutely. I think, you know, They feel that their work has been valued. They feel that as a human they're being valued. And they feel that they are part of a team that values them because of the work that they've contributed. 
 So great tips. Great tips for a great communication with. 
 So we're giving someone some positive feedback. 

 Laura | 25:30
Well, and in that example, the person receiving the feedback knows exactly what they did right. So when we share with people what they've done right, then they're more likely to do it again. Yes. Versus good job, which they don't know what they did well. 

 Rose | 25:49
It's a bit like talking to you, to your dog. I mean, you say good job. But, yeah, they don't know that they did a good job. You have to give it right there and then too. You can't just leave it, you know, and leave it five days later. Thank you for doing that. I think you've got to give it. It's got to be done straight away. 

 Laura | 26:07
Timing, yes, absolutely. Timing is very important. And so it makes a world of difference as well. 
 So yes, great example, and that our communication needs to be timely. And as I said, close to the incident as possible. 
 I mean, it doesn't mean it has to happen immediately. But definitely, the more deposits we can make in that relationship bank account, and the more timely we can do it, the more that bank account is going to grow. 

 Rose | 26:36
Absolutely. Now, if you want to learn more about Laura or Get in touch with her about her coaching services. You can find her on LinkedIn at Laura Watson, on Facebook at Laura Watson, and you can visit her website at venturecoaching.ca. And she wants to give away some free stuff. 

 Laura | 26:56
Yeah, I love giving away free stuff. So if people do visit my website, as you said, at VentureCoaching.ca, there's actually a free tab. And there's a number of ebooks there that people are welcome to download. There's communication ebook, there's one on feedback. There's an ebook on business planning. 
 So there's a number of topics that are covered in a number of resources. So I invite people to go ahead and check that out. To take advantage of those. Freebies are always fun. 
 And then if they want to have a conversation with me, I'm always happy to do so. So they can, my phone number is on my site. They can reach out directly that way, or they can fill in the form and we can connect by phone or Loom pretty much with anyone, anywhere in the world. 

 Rose | 27:44
Laura, it has been an absolute pleasure. Thank you for being a great guest and telling us about how we can be better communicators. 

 Laura | 27:54
Well, my pleasure. I really hope that your listeners have gotten some value from this conversation today. 

 Rose | 28:00
I'm sure they will have. Thanks again. Bye for now.

 Laura | 28:02
My pleasure. Bye for now. 

 Outro | 28:05
You've been listening to Talking With The Experts, hosted by Rose Davidson. Make sure you have a look at our back catalogue over at talkingwiththeexperts.com. And be sure to subscribe to our podcast so you don't miss out on any episode. We look forward to your company next time.