I Guess I’m an Adult Now...

Dating, Love, & Marriage: Honest Advice from my African Dad - Ep 15

Chizi Season 2 Episode 15

Text us and share your adulting stories!

My African dad is BACK — and this time we’re talking dating, relationships, marriage, culture, red flags, green flags, and everything in between. 😂

We unpack the conversations immigrant kids never have with their parents, including why he never asked about boyfriends, his evolving views on interracial dating, and what he believes women (and men!) should look for in a serious partner.

This episode is honest, funny, and surprisingly vulnerable. Get ready to take notes.


CHAPTERS
1:00 Growing Up African & Avoiding Dating Conversations
5:10 Cultural Expectations Around Marriage
8:00 Would Dad Accept a Non-Nigerian Partner?
12:50 Black Women & Marriage Statistics
16:00 Are Men Falling Behind? Masculinity Today
18:20 Successful Women & Men’s Insecurity
21:00 What Women Need to Know About Men
23:45 Dad’s Advice to Successful Women
26:30 Do Men Need to Work Harder?
27:30 When I Started Dating (Dad Is SHOCKED)
29:50 My Dating Experiences Now
32:00 The “Pick You Up In My Heart” Disaster
35:30 Standards, Initiative & Red Flags
37:00 What My Dad Thinks I Should Work On
39:30 Understanding My Anger & Communication Style
41:00 Should Women Date Multiple Men?
43:00 Green Flags in a Serious Partner
45:30 Financial Support & Intentionality
47:40 Men: How to Pursue a Successful Woman
48:40 Women: Watch His Actions, Not His Words
49:40 Red Flags You Should Never Ignore
51:00 What Men Should Look for in Women
52:20 How Fast Should Marriage Be Discussed?
54:00 Love Bombing & Moving Too Fast
55:10 Why Your Gut Matters in Dating


You can also listen on:
Apple: 
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-guess-im-an-adult-now/id1810057948 

Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/show/6RTnICKr8KoafopcFoOLqR?si=ef446f1c3802432e 

Catch up on:
The very first episode of Season 1 ⬇️
I’m Starting Life Over at 29 - Ep 01 
https://youtu.be/rucAJBDkc3c

You might like ⬇️
An Honest Conversation with my African Dad on Addiction - Ep09
https://youtu.be/_j8TtWodLcc

There's more for Season 2⬇️
Am I still Christian? Navigating Religion as an Adult - Ep 12
https://youtu.be/ahU5uaDd7DM?si=PNVY2iRoYlYmFn_d

Should you be a Content Creator in 2025? - S2 Ep 11
https://youtu.be/xymT216OLOE?si=cjGS2QQXJjPBkB5-

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SPEAKER_04:

Hey guys, welcome back to the podcast. I'm your girl Chizzy, and we have a special guest, our favorite recurring guest. Papa Duro to you guys, my daddy for me, but welcome back.

SPEAKER_01:

That's right, thank you. Good to be back.

SPEAKER_04:

This is season two, by the way, if you didn't know.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

This is season two of the podcast, and you have been a fan favorite, so it seems like maybe you've got a recurring spot here. Is that okay with you?

SPEAKER_01:

Perfect.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, because he's retired, so he needs things to do anyway.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, that keeps me busy. And I love it anyway.

SPEAKER_04:

I love it. Okay, so today, honestly, I just wanted us to have conversations that you know you don't normally have with your parents, right? Um, I know growing up, and maybe you guys can relate as well, but like growing up, there were just certain things I did not talk to my parents about. And being from an immigrant household, being from an African black household, child, there were just certain things the parents didn't know about. But now that we're adults, we're all grown now, I want to kind of just open the floor.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

You know, so we start talking about those um not so typical uh topics. And I feel like it should it will be good to also encourage, you know, other parents out there to kind of open and be more open and have more conversations with their kids earlier than later.

SPEAKER_00:

Yep. Yeah for real.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. But you know what though, Daddy? One thing that I'll give you your props on is you never shied away from having like the hard conversations with me.

SPEAKER_01:

No, though we didn't just talk too, too, too much about the little things that I'm just finding out when that you're an adult.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But uh, at least I make sure you being the only girl. So I was on guard.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

So I had to tell you, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

A little one-to-one to so I want to talk about dating because I think I feel like that is something that I definitely didn't really talk to you about when I was growing up. Like boys, mm-mm.

SPEAKER_01:

And I never asked you.

SPEAKER_04:

You never asked me either.

SPEAKER_01:

Why didn't you ask me? Like, what was that about? Because, you know, for some reason, I'm like, I just want you to just concentrate on your books. Books. Books. So, what is there to talk about? Boyfriend is not a topic. Your books, then when you are okay, then you can talk about boyfriend. But you know, that wasn't that that wasn't the perfect thinking.

SPEAKER_04:

I love that you're saying this. I it's almost like great minds think alike, because I was gonna bring this up. Continue though.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I wish I had like, do you have a boyfriend? Can you bring him over? Or experience? Because it's like a relationship with a man and also a man's relationship with a woman. It's gotta start from somewhere, and the earlier the better, the better.

SPEAKER_04:

So it's so funny that you're bringing this up now because uh, you know, me and mommy went to um Atlanta recently for like a wedding, and she was hanging out with some of her friends, and you know, their husband, the husbands and wives were together. And you know, they're people in your age group, right? They're empty nesters now, and like their kids are either getting married or you know whatnot. And so all of them were Nigerian, right? And they were basically sharing and talking about how their kids aren't getting married. Like they were saying that the girls are not getting married, like some of them had daughters that were like 30 plus unmarried, and you know, the boys aren't really interested in getting married either. So they were just like kind of talking about what they feel like went wrong, and maybe like how maybe just some things that they may have done that didn't help. And I contributed to the conversation because I was actually the only like young one there, and so I had to give them my opinion on what I think is uh kind of contributed to that.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

And to your point, I do feel like, at least for the girls, right? We were told to focus on our studies and education and whatnot, and then all of a sudden we graduate from college and now it's like, okay, so where's your husband? Are you getting married? And it's like, but when we were growing up, nobody talked to us about the practical day-to-day of what dating and courting should look like, you know? Yeah, so it kind of left us at a disadvantage because people from other cultures and backgrounds, I feel like they kind of intertwined all of it education, dating, and they were more open with it. So it's like they would allow their kids to go on dates or bring the boyfriend over to the house or take the boyfriend on family vacation, which personally, personally not doing, but like the point is they started younger, right?

SPEAKER_01:

You know, at that time, how could I see myself you coming home with the with the with the with the boyfriend? You know, it's like no, no, no, no, no. But guess what? That that should have but that's the way we grew up at home, right? You know, how can I bring a girlfriend before my parents? But however, though, and my situation is a little different because through family relationship, I did have uh a girlfriend, even though we were hiding too, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

It didn't come out open, it's that hiding thing, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

It's that hiding thing, you know, but we looked at it as something that really helped us because we concentrated on studies.

SPEAKER_04:

You know what though, I think you guys also didn't have as much distractions.

SPEAKER_01:

You know what? You're right about that, yeah. Because you see, now it's modern age, phone, whatsapp, blah blah blah. You know, we didn't have none of those.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, so it's like of course, once you finish school, yeah, the next thing they do is get married.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, it's all about book studies, book studies throughout, you know, young age, you know. Do you think but there are some families back home though who actually were more open with the relationship with their child who taught their children about dating? Yeah, there are families like that, but mine, no, no, no, no, no. It wasn't like that. So no, no. If I were to do it again, like what with what I know now, yeah, and then at the time we guys were kids, yeah, oh boy, it would have it would be different. How it would be different, then it will be different because then I will start teaching you. What would you teach me? Listen, um, it's good to have a boyfriend. You know what I'm saying? Why it's good to have a boyfriend is because you build a relationship. If it's going to work well, it will work. If it's not going to work, let then it's not work, it's not gonna work. Versus when you are now this age.

SPEAKER_04:

When you say this age and you mean like adulthood, like 25.

SPEAKER_01:

You know, like you know, adulthood from 20, 25, 30, yeah, you know, stuff like that. You have a boyfriend now. Versus when you are in high school, yeah, you know, you have a boyfriend, maybe you guys had but hiding it, but we were never open.

SPEAKER_04:

I had a boyfriend in high school.

SPEAKER_01:

You had. How would I know? If we were open, and then the boy will come to the house and we get to know, start interacting as if he's part of the family.

SPEAKER_04:

But see, you know what the issue was as well? Y'all weren't open with the type of people that I wanted to date. If I had brought like somebody that wasn't Nigerian and Ibo, would you have been okay with it?

SPEAKER_01:

Well, why are you trying to put me on the spot?

SPEAKER_04:

We're having we're we're talking about things we never really want to talk about.

SPEAKER_01:

I know, I know, I know, I know. Yeah, right. Like, you know, sometimes that's the that's that's the mistake we we make too. You know what I'm saying? What's the mistake? Uh you're trying to now listen, let's talk about dating.

SPEAKER_04:

This is a part of dating, yeah. So my dad thinks he like not only does he want me to get married to a man, he wants me to get married to an African man, not only just an African man, the man also has to be from Nigeria. Not only does he have to be from Nigeria, he also has to be from the Ibo tribe.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm I'm traditional. I was born and raised Igbo, and even if in the Bible it's even written that don't even try and pull up that verse, but it's true. What's the verse? Yeah, I don't I don't know the verse, but I do know that the Bible did that you married from your tribe, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

That's not even what it meant, like whatever that meant, but that's what it said.

SPEAKER_01:

You see, that's the problem. However, though, you know, that's it's being traditional and being a hundred percent hype core Igbo man, you know. I'm saying I would like you to get married to an Igbo man. Okay, and the reason being that the culture is the same, you don't have to go through you know this culture, conflicts, um, differences in language and you know, way of life, you know, that you know and that's understandable, that's completely understandable. It comes to play too, no, for real.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I'm I'm I'm with you on it. It's just I don't think it should be like the end all be all. Yes, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01:

And but how do you enjoy the fact that sometimes your home is closer to your Madonna home? How you like that?

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so he's basically saying that like because my him and my mom are um from neighboring villages in Nigeria, like they're literally like their villages are like 10 minutes apart, right? So whenever we go um back to Nigeria for like family vacation and things like that, like we can visit my dad's village quickly, go to my mom's village right there, versus maybe if mommy was from another country, we'd have to like go to another country to call it geographical convenience, you know, not geographical convenience.

SPEAKER_01:

You looking at your this is my dad's heritage, this is my mom's heritage, and and they're 10 minutes apart. You don't have to, you don't have to take a plan to go there, to go there, to see that, to know that this right there.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I mean too, and to your point, these are definitely things that I think about as I'm dating. So I used to be like somebody that I wanted to marry um somebody that was also from my same tribe, but after like having a bunch of experiences where I'm like, okay, this is not working out, so maybe let me try something different. So I've I've been trying like other um ethnicities, and I haven't I haven't entered different races yet, but I have entered different ethnicities. It's ethnicity, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, ethnicity, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, and um that is something that I will think about. Like, okay, if we have kids, like how are we gonna like uh decide on like when it's holiday time, like where are we gonna go? And I'm like, wow, we'd have to take a plane to go see another the other side.

SPEAKER_01:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

It's a lot.

SPEAKER_01:

I know, but you can make it work, it's not it's nothing wrong with that too. It's nothing wrong with it, just like our family friends. When I look at his wife being white and the children, yeah, being mixed, yeah, I'll think about Obama, and then I'll think about I'm like, you know what? I think we need to really soften on that because sometimes actually don't like don't actually take this seriously and don't go bring somebody it might it might be good, it has its own good too, you know, as far as opening up the family to other cultures, a mixture of you know, listen, it could be good, you know. Honestly, this is like this is groundbreaking, you know. It's could be it could be good.

SPEAKER_04:

You won't are you saying this only for the camera?

SPEAKER_01:

No, no, no. Listen, cheesy, don't put me on the spot. What because you you I know what you're thinking. I'm not thinking anything. No, no, no, yeah, no, you're pushing me. But the the reality is on a very serious note, seriously speaking, and life generally. Live life don't have to be like a one-way traffic, you know. That's one way, that's two way, that's you know, U-tons and stuff like that. And any tone could be good, could be wonderful, it could be disastrous too. Okay, absolutely. So either way, you can't write off anything. So by racial marriages, and I'm beginning to like racial?

SPEAKER_04:

This is groundbreaking because I I was just leaving Nigeria. He said maybe even race.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

You know what? I'm gonna open it up.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, listen, it's your life, okay. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04:

This is shocking, guys.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, it's it's your life. That's the basic truth. Okay, it's your life, so you take into account your experience, what you like, what you're you know, you're an adult. But I can always I can only tell you what I feel, and give advice and your opinion, and give advice and opinion and stuff like that, and then it's entirely up to you, you know. So, um listen, Jizzy. Yeah, yeah, yes, you know, openness is good.

SPEAKER_04:

Wow, listen, guys, when I tell you this has been a big debate between my dad and I, like, yes, and when I privately talk with your mother and stuff like that, you know, she's you know, we we fight over this.

SPEAKER_01:

Why can't you? I'm like, some woman, when a father sees things, you know, we see beyond, we just don't see there. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04:

Do you know that according to statistics in America, of course, um black women are the least like likely to get married as compared to other races?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Like we we are the least married.

SPEAKER_01:

But what what what would what would be the attribute to that? Why why do you why?

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I think it's a couple of things. Um the fact that like in America, so majority of like black women have an affinity to want to marry like a black man, right? So there's the concept of um although black women want to marry black men, black men also have like more options outside of just black women to potentially marry, right? So now the competition is a lot more technically, like there's more competition for the woman. And naturally there's more women than men anyway. Of course. And then in the black population, you've also got like half of the men, a lot of them are like incarcerated, right? Um, and then there's the disparity with education, right? So a lot of black women are making, they're more educated, they're making a lot more money. So then there's that disparity, which just makes it a lot tougher for them to find like um a good man. Yeah, a good adequate partner that's also like black. So and then you've got the immigrant addition to things where it's like we're not talking about dating and marriage until like we've completed school, and by then the men have been taken.

SPEAKER_01:

But that is true though. The black man is more likely to be arrested than other races, yeah. That's that's a fact, and that is why black men need to really sit down, and I mostly black families start from time, you know, disciplining the children. Because while I was in social service, I realized it's like a circle. Yes. Some they don't go to school, they end up in the street, there's absence of the man in the house, no father figure to really do, you know, the disciplinary part.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Because a mother's love, you know, mothers by nature, then nine months, the love, the other love. But that love could be also could be detrimental too, because there's coddling. There's like whatever the child does, that love. I don't think your mother, when you guys were reasonable, I was the one that was like, you know, disciplining, yeah. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? So it affects black boys a lot, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

So speaking of, because this is something that I feel like I listen, I talk about in my friend group, like a lot of black women talk about this where it's like they feel like the men, they're not keeping up. I feel like before there was just this idea of like the alpha man and that you know they're very masculine, right? They go out to work and bring the money. They're the the breadwinner, right?

SPEAKER_02:

Exactly.

SPEAKER_04:

They're the ones going to school, but now it's like almost opposite, where now it's like the women are the breadwinner. Breadwinners. Um, we're the ones making a lot more money. Um, we're, you know, launching businesses and things like that. And a lot of women do complain that they feel like the men aren't, they're not doing their part. So, do you think that is attributed to just like how they're being raised?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, being raised. But that's something about women too. I don't want to generalize.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, we're not gonna generalize.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, and I don't want to say anything negative about anyone, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Because but white, black, Hispanic women, women are women. Yes, you know what I'm saying? But some of our women they grow up, they have a little money. The man doesn't mean anything to them.

SPEAKER_04:

So you think that women, okay, we're not generalizing here.

SPEAKER_01:

We're not generalizing.

SPEAKER_04:

We're not generalizing, but okay, we're talking about okay, let's say black women, right? You feel like some black women they'll start making money and then the money kind of gets to their head, and now they kind of treat men as like sub bar.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's that's that's what I what I know. A woman, some. Some. I'm not saying all. Some women will see some success and then they start looking down on the men, and before you know it, they start recruiting other women, and before you know it, they start looking down on the men. I've had women say, I don't need a man. I've I've had many women say that. Why? Because they have money.

SPEAKER_04:

So it's interesting that you bring this up because I think multiple things can be true at the same time, right? And could be happening at the same time. So I do think like a part of it is like one, the feminist movement where it's like empowerment for women. And I and I'm all for that, right? Women should be empowered. I do think sometimes we get we just take things to the extreme. And this is with honestly any type of like belief ideologies. Like the problem is it goes too extreme, right? So there was a point where it's like that movement now, it's like, okay, I don't need a man at all, you know. And it's like for a second, I kind of was falling into that, and then I said, wait a minute, I need a man.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's as simple as that.

SPEAKER_04:

Like, hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm all for my independence, you know, and my financial autonomo um autonomy, all those things. But it's also like I I want companionship as well, and there's nothing wrong with that either. Um, so yeah, I mean, I do I see your point in that.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, and it's it uh it's it's like a chain reaction, right? Yeah, if you're a successful woman, then you start looking down on the man. Okay, now that's that's one point. Now the other one is if you have a child and then you have this belief that you don't need a man, but definitely you want to have a child, except where you don't want to have a child. Okay. But if you do have want to have children, definitely a man has to be in the picture. And there are some women, oh let me have my child, I don't want any man.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

Sometimes some women they raise good kids too, you know what I'm saying? You mean like single mothers? Single mothers, they raise good kids.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But guess what? If you stay by statistics, Children from a home where the mother and the father are together, that's always a difference when it's only the man or only the woman. That is not to say it's bad or it's good. But when two disciplined people come together and raise a child, you can see that reflection in that child.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04:

Most times.

SPEAKER_01:

Most most of the time. Most of the time, yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Sometimes they don't work out like that.

SPEAKER_01:

That is true. And you see some single mothers who even perform better than the man in disciplining the child. Yeah. And the children come out good. Yeah. So, you know, like you said, things could be different.

SPEAKER_04:

But let's also, since we were talking about women, right? Let's also talk about the man real quick, right? Because, okay, when women are successful, I do think something that we have to keep in mind, especially since this is where we are now in the day, in this day and age, right? Women, we're successful. We are, right? We're getting educated, we're making our money. Something that I think also happens is either like a successful woman will meet a man that is like insecure, or like he'll he'll try to humble her, or like, right? Because maybe he's not making as much. And that's okay, because technically, if somebody, if I'm making 200,000 and maybe my partner's making 80,000, right? Like, if you put that together, that's almost 300,000 together, which is incredible. But sometimes, you know, some men can feel a little bit like insecure. Um, and a lot of women have been experiencing that where it's like, I don't know, the men, the men are are being mean, their their egos are shot. And what do you what do you say to that?

SPEAKER_01:

It's a fact. Let me talk as an African.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. Yes, some men cannot just handle successful women. Oh. That's a fact, that's a known fact.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

It takes a man, a real man, to really manage a successful woman. Because, yes, the woman that has money, she it's natural, most natural about women. The minute they have money, what it's natural. They have to. In a simple argument, oh, they will remind you. They will let you know. But you, being as the man, don't let that get to you. Find a way to go around it and make sure that whatever she's making and whatever you're making goes towards one particular population, the children. You know? So some men don't handle successful women, especially some of my African brothers. Because back home, it's like the man is the king. You make your money, give it to me. You know? But here it's different. And some of us can't handle it. That's why you see some marriages um with uh problems. But most of the time, that thing comes from the woman's attitude of I have money.

SPEAKER_04:

So would you say that? Okay, so so I think so. What advice would you give women um as they are progressing in their careers?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Um, what advice would you give to them so that they are just cognizant and and have healthy relationships?

SPEAKER_01:

Women, listen to me. The minute you find yourself successful, just know that you are one source of success. You need a partner to make that success perfect. The idea of you making money and start looking down on the man, it doesn't cut it out. Except you just don't want anything man. And if you don't want anything man, forget all about children because it takes a man. So you cannot want children and then you don't want the man. You actually can. You can adopt. Yeah, you can adopt. Yeah, adoption, you can do that. But if you want to produce a child from your own womb, you know, you get you get you got a man. What is the advice you would give women? That's exactly what I'm saying. Okay, okay. My advice is do not let your success, your money, blind you from the importance of a man in your life. Humble yourself. Make that man realize that the money you are making is the money for us, not just for me. You know, naturally, women like trying to hide, you know, hide enough. Come on, come out in the open. And you have a perfect man that will love you. Because men, yes, we do have a problem. Yes, because a man's ego is a man's ego. But women, you can help us deal with that ego by humbling yourself. Please don't don't don't start all this time through and making money. Who do you think you are? I'm this and that. Yes, you are or there, but humble yourself, let that man in, walk with that man. But do you think men should work harder? Listen, I can tell you that except in some very minor instances where you have some foolish men who just think that the woman will go out and work for them and bring them money. There are men like that who don't who think, oh, she's making money. Let me relax. As a man, you owe it to yourself to make sure that the woman perceives you as somebody that is making efforts. You know, sometimes with women though, they do they you know, women are very emotional. You know, they love you and they see that you're making effort, you're working very hard and stuff like that. Versus they look at you, you're not making any effort. You know what I'm saying? All you want to do is just sleep with me and then spend my money. No woman would like that. Make an effort, fight to get a job, fight to do something as a man. You you you you need it. You need it. Okay, you know, sometimes I begin to wonder, I'm like, does she have a boyfriend? I mean, back in high school, does she have a boyfriend? Is she a virgin? Anyway, when she was in college, I'm not there, your mother's not there, you are out there. I wonder what's going on. You know, these things eat me up, you know, and every time I'm I like when I come up to your school when you're in our bunny, I'd be like watching to see if there's a guy around. And I don't see anyone.

SPEAKER_04:

Wait.

SPEAKER_01:

So when did you start having a boyfriend?

SPEAKER_04:

When did I start dating?

SPEAKER_01:

When did you start dating? Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

I started dating in high school.

SPEAKER_01:

How did you do that? Because you are grown, you are going from home to school.

SPEAKER_00:

Wait, what do you mean? How did I do that? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Where you guys meet yourselves, did you go to his house?

SPEAKER_00:

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01:

Because definitely nobody came to my house.

SPEAKER_00:

You don't know that.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, that's interesting.

SPEAKER_00:

Did you bring?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh boy. Oh my gosh. That's interesting. Yeah, because definitely sometimes we're not home.

SPEAKER_04:

You guys were at home.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. So did you bring the thing.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01:

Bring the man to the house, and when was that?

SPEAKER_04:

Not you want to. And you want to know every little thing. Please. Um, I didn't do it often, to be fair. Like, I usually we would just like go out to like go to the mall.

SPEAKER_01:

Your boyfriend came to the house?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, one time.

SPEAKER_01:

Why didn't you let him come when we're home? Because I was scared. You're scared, right? Because of the way we are like pushing, don't, don't, don't.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, and he wasn't Nigerian. He was Haitian.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh yeah?

SPEAKER_04:

He's like, this is news.

SPEAKER_01:

You know, sometimes parents will think we know stuff. We don't know nothing. Not a thing. So where is he now?

SPEAKER_00:

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01:

You see, maybe if we were all involved, maybe because I don't know. Maybe what? Maybe it would have worked out new guy. I don't know. No.

SPEAKER_04:

But um, okay. So speaking of dating though, I want to talk to you about like my dating experiences now.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. So I I'm so interested. No, I'm sorry. So I like dating, dating is really hard for me. Because it's just, I don't know. I feel like it's the type of person that I am. Like, I'm a very it's either I like you or I don't like you. Like, there's it's really hard for me to like pretend.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. So I don't know. But that's you, though. That's that's me. You're you're done.

SPEAKER_04:

There's no in between.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. So online dating is a big thing now. You've heard about that? Yeah. So I've tried like the different apps. Actually, recently I tried online dating again. Like I went and made my little profile. Um, and actually I went on a couple of dates with a few people.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. And I want to actually get your thoughts on some of the experiences that I've had on said dates with some folks. Okay. Okay. And this is what I mean by like some men trying to like humble successful women or just like humble women in general. I don't know. Maybe it's not even a success thing.

SPEAKER_01:

I think maybe they are just They just want a woman to be under them.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't know. But okay, so I had this experience one time where like I was talking to someone, right? But this was like early on when we were dating, like very early. And basically, like I had traveled and I was on the plane and I let them know that I had landed, right? And so I texted them, I'm like, oh, I've landed. And they were like, okay, I'm gonna come pick you up. But now I was shocked because we hadn't talked about um him picking me up or whatever. So I was a little confused, but I was like, oh, maybe he can because maybe he'll just like send an Uber for me or something like that. Um, so I'm like, okay, cool. So I'm like, really? And then he was like, LOL, I'm picking you up in my heart.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, picking you up in his heart.

SPEAKER_04:

So he was like joking. What do you think about something like that? Well, I blocked him after that, just so you know.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, well, there are two ways to look at it. What's the two ways? The one way is that you took him serious. You respect what he said. Okay, and you believed him.

SPEAKER_04:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

You have every right to believe him.

SPEAKER_04:

Exactly. You say something, so I believe you.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, of course. You do you should believe him because why would you not believe him and you guys are trying to build a relationship?

SPEAKER_04:

Right. It's not outlandish for someone to offer to pick you up if you are landing from the airport, even though he doesn't have a car.

SPEAKER_01:

It could be he can pick up a taxi and come there and surprise you. And we will love that.

SPEAKER_00:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Or call a taxi for you, but I will pick you up in my heart. Well, I guess he probably was joking, but that joke, ah, for somebody you're trying to, I don't know, man. I just feel like where is the chivalry, man? Anyway, people will interpret it differently. That was nonsense.

SPEAKER_04:

That was nonsense.

SPEAKER_01:

That to me, if I'm dating you, right, and I want to really impress you, you know, yeah. Yeah, I'm not gonna tell you, I'm gonna come pick you up, and then turn it down, I pick you up in my heart. It's a ton of, I'm telling you, I'm sorry. Maybe somebody might see it as but to me, it's a ton of.

SPEAKER_04:

Exactly. It's really and honestly, I feel like that is the definition, like that's an example of a red flag. And for me, I have learned to just really listen to my gut and my intuition and the Holy Spirit, right? When I start seeing a red flag or I'm really not comfortable with something, I don't do too much back and forth anymore or try to like negotiate it because I feel like at the end of the day, we're allowed to have our like wants and desires in a relationship and in a person, right? And if I have a boundary of like just standard respect, and you know, I want somebody to, you know, pick me up and things like that. I don't think that's a crazy thing.

SPEAKER_01:

And it's a beautiful thing to do for someone you really want to impress. But you you were expecting him to what? To pick you up when he said that?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, because and you were disappointed? Yes. Why are you laughing? What is funny about that?

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, oh God.

SPEAKER_04:

No, because I knew that it was like I was surprised, right? But I knew that it was like a possibility. Like it's not like if it wasn't something that he could actually feasibly do, I'd be like, okay, I know he's joking. But it was actually something that he could do if he wanted to. So I'm like, you have the ability to do it, and you know you have the ability to do it because you even brought it up, and then you turn around to not do it. If that things like that make me very irate. But I also think I'm a very like, I like initiative because I am somebody that like I like I'm very forward, like I think about a lot of things, right? I have a lot of responsibilities. I'm the only girl in my family, so I'm naturally the family manager. So it's like I'm very, I don't like to say that I'm alpha, but I am kind of alpha, right? So it's like I need somebody that is also like they just take initiative with things. If not, I feel like you're my sibling.

SPEAKER_01:

Anybody, anybody in their right mind will actually react the same way you did. Okay, thank you. No, so just but he tried to make me seem like I was crazy. No, no, no, no, no. The thing is that at this level, at this juncture, that you are dating, you're not you're not in high school. We're 30. No, you're not in high school. You have some jokes because at this level is you're not dating just for the sake of dating.

SPEAKER_04:

And let's keep in mind this man was over 35.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, so that uh you you you want somebody serious, okay. Serious, thank you at this level. You know, come on.

SPEAKER_04:

I had to listen, Daddy. Let me tell you something. I had to tell that man off.

unknown:

You know.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, that was a turn off. I don't know, man.

SPEAKER_04:

I had to tell him off. I told, you know what I told him? I said, because he, I basically like I stopped talking after that because I'm like, you're not about to play around with me like that. Like that is insane. Um, and basically, like he was upset that like I wasn't talking, and he was just like, all this stuff. And basically, when I told him why I was upset with the airport stuff, he was like, What? I was just joking, like I'm like, baby, your baby, you too old to be joking like that.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, your date traveled and coming back. Well, you know, you we are real when we were dating. Okay. As a man. And if if I know and I'm trying to really impress you, okay. You know what I would do? What would you do? The time you are coming and the time you're landing, I know the time. Okay, I'll be there wedding. Boom! You see me there. Oh, baby.

SPEAKER_04:

And you would be there with flowers.

SPEAKER_01:

Just I'm telling you, seriously. It's not like uh children kind of joke. Like, come on! That's that's too.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I'm sorry. That is to me.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04:

That's that's crazy. Yeah, so I had to let him know. I said, first of all, do you know that my father would drive two hours right now to come and pick me up from the airport if I asked him? And you're here saying, uh, I'll pick you up in my heart. That's how he'll be playing games with me for the rest of my life. I'm okay.

SPEAKER_01:

That joke wasn't appropriate. Yeah, so those are some of But anyway, you guys that no, it's done. So, but what effort had he made any effort to correct that?

SPEAKER_04:

No, he actually like started to argue with me about it that I was complaining. He literally would say that I was complaining, okay, and that I don't know how to take a joke.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. So I said after that, I said he gave up.

SPEAKER_04:

No, he kept trying and stuff, but I'm just like you never give him a chance again. No, I did. And he kept disappointing me. Like, there was just a lack of initiative with things, with even when it came to like planning dates. And I'm like, once once I kind of give you one, two chances, and there's still no there's no adjustment in behavior, I take people as they are and I believe them, and I remove it.

SPEAKER_01:

And that is one lesson. Men who are looking for a life partner, that's one lesson that you have to learn. Which is seriousness in that dating. Yeah. Because one thing with women, they're very sensitive, they watch you. Because a woman wants a man that loves her, protects her, and stuff like that. And when you give those signals, like every little thing is a joke to you, the woman is not gonna take you serious.

SPEAKER_04:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, actually, you know what I want to know? Because I'm your daughter and I feel like you know me pretty well. What do you think I could work on when it comes to like dating?

SPEAKER_01:

I'm glad you asked this question. Yeah, I'm glad. Very, very good.

SPEAKER_04:

Let's let's keep it cute though.

SPEAKER_01:

One thing I know about you is is either A or B. But you know, as time goes on, you know, there's always that little blend. Little blend. It doesn't have to be pow. Black or white. You know what I'm saying? It's a little blend. You have a heart of God, I know that. And that's why the man that really will marry you, I want to give that man the secret to your heart. Because if they don't understand it, they will not unlock it. I will, I'm telling you. And why you think I'm so bad about? I don't want to call his name. Because I know you, you don't like somebody daring you.

SPEAKER_04:

Wait, yeah, oh my gosh, that you know me so well.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, you don't like that. You know, don't dare me. You know what I'm saying? Because if you dare me, yeah, yeah, you know, I'm about to show you, you know, but you like when somebody's nice and sweet to you, and you know, most of the time when I get to your corporation, you know, I always pet you, you know. I do go, blah blah. And you you are just you're like that. Not me being a lion, versus no, you you you you like you know, you get loosen up a little bit on that.

SPEAKER_04:

You see, I feel like I feel like I tried that. I tried to loosen up, and I feel like it gave men, they you know when you give somebody an inch and they take a yard, right? I feel like I can't loosen up with the men. I need to be strict. I know, I know, but you know, you you're but I do think when there is like finally partnership, I do think I could be more compromising.

SPEAKER_01:

You have that's the word, yeah. Compromising. I do need to learn how to compromise more. Exactly. Absolutely, I'll take that. So that otherwise you are perfect, you know, and when you are angry, please leave her alone.

SPEAKER_00:

Wait, oh my god.

SPEAKER_01:

When you are angry, just because your anger doesn't last forever, you'll be so angry as if you're gonna put this whole house down, but the next minute it's all sweet, and you don't even remember. You you just go with the flow. But whoever doesn't know you and you get angry and they don't want to be. Oh no.

SPEAKER_04:

You know that's what happened with the last guy?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh no.

SPEAKER_04:

He he had no idea.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh no, oh no, he had no idea.

SPEAKER_04:

He kept trying to talk back to me. I said, Oh, sir.

SPEAKER_01:

Shouldn't have done that. I think you kind of get that from me too.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, you're like that.

SPEAKER_01:

Because your mom, when I'm angry, and I don't like it. I like when I'm angry. I want her to be angry so that we can. But when I'm angry, she stops. And I get so frustrated. Oh, you're not saying anything. And then if she says something good, I'm gonna go the next level. So the best thing is that she doesn't say anything. And then before you know it, I would not end up even doing what she even wants. Because the under so whoever that is dating you and wants to get your heart, please don't square off when she's angry. Let her after that anger, you have you have an angel. Yeah. Alright.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so you want me to be a little bit more compromising. Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes. You know.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay. I'll take that. Do you think women should date multiple men?

SPEAKER_01:

That's a very good question. Trying to pretend about anything is not gonna give you the correct answer here. Okay. All right. Let's keep it real. We adults now. We're gonna keep it real for real. Seriously. Men, we got our own issues. Okay. And there's always that likelihood for a man to drag you to everything is perfect, you think everything is nice, it's only him. People have known you, people blah blah blah. We are down the line, he might disappoint you. And by the time that happens, you have wasted time. People have seen you and him, everybody, blah blah blah. And then to him, I know men. It's like he has to move on. And now you start building again with somebody else to building again. So the idea of dating multiple men is not the best, but it's hard because if that man falls off, then you start all over again. You know, so it's good to have friends.

SPEAKER_04:

Have friends. You are so big on that.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, have friends, yes, a friendship, a friendship. There's nothing wrong with having a friendship, and then out of that whole friendship, there is one that is more friendly, more serious that you will focus on, and that is why men be serious. Don't don't don't don't mess a man, don't mess up a woman. Be serious, don't just because it's difficult dating this man, dating this one, dating this man at all levels. You know, but have friends, friends that can be more.

SPEAKER_04:

What would you say are some green flags that women should look out for in a potentially like serious guy?

SPEAKER_01:

Somebody who wants to know, a man wants to know about your family. Let me use myself as an example as a man. Okay. If I'm dating you and I'm dating you enough to love you to even marry you.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. I want to know about your family background.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so a green flag is that he's like interested in your family background. He wants to know more.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, of course. That's that in fact, that's number one. Oh, okay. Yeah. Your father, your mother, you know, your siblings, you know, in conversations. Because while you do that is you want to know a woman that you will marry who is family-oriented, who will build your own family. Because you you give what you have. You don't give what you don't have.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Now, another green fly is he wants to do things with you. Okay. You know what I'm saying? He wants to he wants to take you out, he's proud of you. Oh, you know, he wants your friends. This is my girl, you know, and stuff like that. He's proud of you and fuck.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay. So he's not hiding you.

SPEAKER_01:

He's not hiding you.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh.

SPEAKER_01:

No, he's not hiding you.

SPEAKER_04:

I know some of y'all listening right now. You like, hold on now. This man.

SPEAKER_01:

How can a man be saying, and then, you know, you don't want people. No, no, no. He's proud of you.

SPEAKER_04:

All right. So he doesn't want to hide you, right? He wants to take you out. He's planning dates. He's taking initiative in that way. All right, what's one more green flag?

SPEAKER_01:

A green flag is you're living and you're making a living. And your problems, your difficulties. I'm interested to know. Like if I'm dead in you now. Oh, how much rent are you paying here? Okay. And you're handling it.

unknown:

Oh!

SPEAKER_01:

And you're handling it?

SPEAKER_04:

You see, this is why I need a Nigerian man. Because you see, if my father thinks this way, what do you think I would be thinking?

SPEAKER_00:

Wait, so it's true now.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so essentially you're saying like a green flag for somebody that's you know looking to take you seriously is he wants to like help you out financially in some type of way. He wants to, would I would would you go as far to say he essentially wants to like make your life easier in some way?

SPEAKER_01:

Of course. That's that's that's the bottom line. And once I'm dating you, if I can help that, I want to do it because that's what it's that's what that that this is what it's all about.

SPEAKER_04:

And ultimately, if this person wants to like marry you, right, it would be a thing where he has to like be taking care of you anyway, in some type of way. So he's like starting to show the that interest and signs to do that early on.

SPEAKER_01:

Very important, very, very important. He's he's interested in your well-being and how to lift you up and how to make you better.

SPEAKER_04:

You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01:

Even if he is not able to financially, yes, he shows that he means that. And even to make it better, listen, I know you are living, I know you are paying rent, I know you're doing all that. Listen, I know you probably have money to do all that, but uh you wouldn't mind, please just just use this to add to your phone bill at least. Or to your connedison, to something. Yeah, you have it. Right. But he shows that to you, you pick up the five. Oh, this man really, really, if I'm not, if I'm not up and doing financially or anything, he has my back.

SPEAKER_04:

That's nice. Yeah, that's nice to know, even for like the successful women, right? Because sometimes women are making a lot more, right? But and maybe he recognizes that, but with what he does have, he still he still wants to give in some type of way to make sure you're okay. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

And that is how you get that successful woman.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, for the men that are listening, yeah, there are some keys.

SPEAKER_01:

That's how you get you somebody like me with my mindset. Yeah, I know you'll be doing very, very well. Yeah, you're doing fine, and I want you. So now I want to let you know that I will take care of you. I'm not gonna depend on your money to take care of you, and I will show it by giving, by doing that, by buying something, buy it.

SPEAKER_00:

So the successful woman will be like, Wow, because women are you know, we want to be taken care of, we may women can be easy, you know. We're actually very simple, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

She'll be like, Wow, right there, and then she is ready to upfront with her money.

SPEAKER_04:

So, would you say that women should take heed to a man's actions more than his words?

SPEAKER_01:

Listen, if you take a man's words more than you take his actions, you're gonna regret it because I can talk to a woman, I can say anything, I can build skyscrapers in the air for you with words, you know, with words, yeah. Men are good at that, yeah. You know what I'm saying? God gave that to men, yeah, it's true. Yeah, so if you are not, if you if you're a woman and you don't have that strong orientation, you're gonna fall for that. Pay attention to the actions, let the actions do the talking. Woo! I'm telling you, and that's the common mistakes women make. They're listening to what more than they listen to the actions.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, this is like music to my ears, and that is the basic truth. All right, period. All right, so let's end off on some three red flags that if you see this in a man, you should probably stop right there.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

And you know that he's not serious about you. What are they?

SPEAKER_01:

Any lie, any lie, no matter how small, yeah, from the beginning, the minute you spot a lie, it's a dead end right there. Oh wow. Yeah. Why a lie could mean anything. Any lie, you can't, you don't, it doesn't matter what lie, any lie you catch from the beginning is is is spot on. The person is not gonna change, it's gonna continue.

SPEAKER_04:

Essentially, you're saying if you catch a man lying, like he's not going to. That's I think what you're saying is one, that's a character flaw. And people usually do not change. So if you're catching them lying, they're gonna continue lying to you.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, they're going to continue. That's who they're like, they're gonna continue lying. Yeah, okay. That's that's who they are. All right, cool.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, another red flag. That doesn't mean that some we're down the line when you guys are living together, he's not gonna lie, or you're not gonna lie. Right, like white life. That's after the fact.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, all right.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, what's the next uh what's the what's another red flag to look out for? The first day you guys come in contact, he wants to sleep with you. Oh yeah, watch out that. Yes, okay, a man that is serious will take his time to know you before getting to that point. So that's that's a red flag. It might work for some people, okay. It might work for some people, yeah. But to me, that shouldn't be the number one focus for the for the man. The main focus is to know you, to know who you are, except once a one-night affair. You know? Okay, so that's that I will consider that a red flag. Okay. All right, and you have a friend, and you're dating the man, and he's always into your friend. Wanna call your friend, wanna talk with your friend, blah, blah, blah. It's a it's a is a it's a red flag. His eyes are wandering.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, yeah, and that means his eyes will continue to wander. All right, all right, cool. Well, we got some keys. So I hope y'all took some notes now. For the men that are listening, because we do have some male listeners, because a lot of men also complain that you know the women they're struggling to find like good quality women. I don't know where they're looking all, but apparently this is a thing, right? So, what would you say to the men, right? As they are trying to search for, you know, good quality women and partners, what are some signs they should be looking for? Like some green flags.

SPEAKER_01:

The green flag, woman who wants to know about your family too, just like okay.

SPEAKER_04:

She wants to understand your family background. The type of family she'd be possibly going into.

SPEAKER_01:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

And I will consider um a lie too. It goes both ways. The woman that will just tell you a lie, it continues. And then a woman that's always like, if you marry me, if you marry me, if you marry me, if you marry me, I think yes, she's about marriage, but she should be concerned about knowing the man first. You know what I'm saying? And it is the man that will propose that will come up with that marriage thing, not the woman. Even though these days, you know, but before a woman comes up with marry me, you guys must have spent time.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, let's say they're like 27 and up, right? How long do you think it should take for a man to like propose or start bringing up the idea of marriage?

SPEAKER_01:

To be honest, some men will see you and for some reason they see in you on the first date. They see in you for some reason they just this is the person. There could be instant ones that walk out too, but it shouldn't be years, at most six months. At most, okay.

SPEAKER_04:

So you should basically know the direction that he wants to go with you, yes, at the maximum.

SPEAKER_01:

At the maximum, even six months is way too far. Okay, way, way too far. You it will almost instantly. You will start knowing this man is really serious.

SPEAKER_04:

Basically, he will be very intentional.

SPEAKER_01:

Exactly.

SPEAKER_04:

That's what I'm saying. I'll be telling people like men know what they want. If they actually really, really want you, there will be so much intention back.

SPEAKER_01:

They won't they will they will show it. Yeah, you will know from their actions, yeah. You will know.

SPEAKER_04:

But do you think women should also be careful of men that move too fast?

SPEAKER_01:

Definitely, because there's a thing called love bombing, yes, definitely, definitely, and that is why you know sometimes I think it's better. This marriage is better when you are mature, you know what you want. Yeah, it's better, yeah. It's it's better, much, much better because you know exactly what you want. Versus when you are still uh in between knowing what you want and what you don't want and stuff like that. Yes, there are some men that want to move fast, you know, they will like to show you blah, blah, blah, blah. Gotta be careful of them too, because they could be hiding a lot. That's why the woman has to listen, and whatever you hear from the man, watch out for the action. Does it match the action? And then pray. You know what I'm saying? But prayer is the number one, even though that's a no-brainer. Yeah, prayer. Yeah. To meet the rabbit because honestly, you might spend five years and don't know the man you want to marry. Yeah, it happens. Oh, absolutely. You might spend a day and know that prayer, prayers is it's good, but watch out for the man that's too slow to just watch out.

SPEAKER_04:

You know what I'm saying? No. But I I mean, I think ultimately it's about like, again, being more in tune with who you are, right? Because as you mature, though you're gonna you know what you want, right? You know what feels like a green light for you and and and feels like you have peace about it, right? Um, versus maybe when you're younger, you don't really like, you're not in tune with yourself and you don't really know how to like listen to your gut or your your intuition, or right, you're still developing your relationship with the Holy Spirit. So you don't know what's a yes and a no. Um, I I see what you mean. Because like now that I'm older, like I am so much more clear on one, who I am and what I'm looking for and what I need. Um, and then also I'm also clear on like what feels like a yes and what feels like a no when I'm dating somebody. So I don't even like so because some of my friends, right, or even like my dad, right? I'll be telling him about a situation and he's like, why don't you give him a chance and this and this? And I'm like, listen, I have to go with my gut feeling, and my gut is telling me it's a no.

SPEAKER_01:

And I'm always right.

SPEAKER_04:

You gotta listen to it, man, because some people don't see what you see, yeah, yeah, or they don't see what God is showing you.

SPEAKER_01:

That is very, very true.

SPEAKER_04:

Because remember, there's been situations where I've literally told my parents about certain things not to do because literally the Lord told me, don't do that thing. They didn't the Lord didn't show them, but the Lord showed me, and I told them, and they sat there and looked at me and said, You are not okay. And lo and behold, when I say it happened exactly how God showed me, it happens, and it's it's like with the last one.

SPEAKER_01:

We're not gonna bring it up. But I told your mom, I'm like, you know one thing? I think we should start listening to that goddess. She's like, who is the goddess? Who else? Because for some reason, everything she has said will come to pass. She warned us about this one, and we pushed her, even with our friend and her children. We tried to convince her, but she stood said no.

SPEAKER_04:

So I've learned to like, as I've matured, right, and I've gotten clear on who I am and my identity and where I'm going. Like, I've learned to actually just listen to my gut. And yeah, I think that's the beauty of waiting a little bit more until you're matured for to like settle down.

SPEAKER_01:

Make the better choice. Yeah. You make a better choice then. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, well, I enjoyed this conversation. We could be here all day, but you know, we don't want to talk your ears off. So thank you. I hope you come back again.

SPEAKER_01:

Of course, definitely. Anytime I'm it's interesting. I'm finding it very, very interesting.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01:

I hope boys and girls learn.

SPEAKER_04:

You mean men and women?

SPEAKER_01:

Men boys and men, boys and girls that grow up to be men and women. Yes. So, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Thank you for the wisdom. We appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you for bringing me here up again. Yeah. I like that. I like to talk.

SPEAKER_04:

All right, guys. Well, we'll catch you in the next episode and we'll see ya. Bye.

SPEAKER_01:

Bye-bye.