Welcome to Dry January | 14 Answers to Your Alcohol & Sobriety Questions

Struggling with Dry January or thinking of cutting back on alcohol? In this bonus Recoverycast episode, guest host Riley Whelan fields the 14 most‑asked questions about Dry January and sober curiosity. She explains how a social media challenge became a powerful way to explore your relationship with alcohol. Whether you’ve never gone a week without drinking or you’re just curious about sobriety, Riley shares practical tips for starting one day at a time, coping with emotional and physical withdrawals, and understanding the true benefits of a 30‑day alcohol detox.

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You’ll learn why accountability is crucial, how to deal with cravings and boredom, and whether you should avoid parties or simply switch to mocktails with supportive friends. Riley talks openly about the discomfort of early sobriety—from mood swings to loneliness—and offers healthier ways to reward yourself than grabbing a bottle. She also discusses navigating relationships when your partner isn’t on board, building confidence without “liquid courage,” and finding sober‑curious communities online or in your city. If Dry January reveals deeper concerns, Riley explains when to seek professional help and how to connect with 12‑step programs or treatment centers. Tune in for a compassionate, candid Q&A that makes sobriety feel less intimidating and more empowering.

⏱️ Chapters:
00:00 – Intro: Dry January Q&A With Riley Whelan
00:21 – What Is Dry January & Why Do People Do It?
01:03 – How Do I Start Dry January If I’ve Never Gone a Week Without Drinking?
02:09 – How Long Does It Take to Feel Better After Stopping Alcohol?
03:12 – Should I Tell People I’m Doing Dry January or Keep It Private?
03:55 – How Do I Deal With Alcohol Cravings, Stress & Boredom?
05:07 – Should I Avoid Parties or Bars During Dry January?
06:24 – How Do I Stay Motivated When Everyone Around Me Is Drinking?
07:49 – What If My Partner Doesn’t Want to Do Dry January?
09:09 – How Can I Feel Confident Without Alcohol?
10:32 – Is It Normal to Feel Lonely, Sad or Restless Without Drinking?
11:48 – How Do I Reward Myself Without Alcohol?
13:06 – Where Can I Meet Sober or Sober-Curious People?
14:57 – What If Dry January Makes Me Realize I Need Help?
16:31 – Final Thoughts & Where to Find Support

#DryJanuary #SoberCurious #QuitDrinking

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey everyone, I'm Riley Whalen. This week Recovery Cast is off, but teeing up for Dry January, we've decided to give you guys a little bonus episode with the 14 top most asked questions I get as someone in recovery from alcoholism and addiction. Here we go. What is dry January? So per the internet, it started out as a global health campaign. However, social media put its own fun little spin on it. And what we saw was a bunch of, you know, young adults, middle-aged adults trying to get sober for a month straight. My interpretation of that was just like a social media trend, just to see, you know, if people could really do it. It turned into something really fun, but I think for other people, it turned into something a little more serious. I think it became a great month for people to explore their relationship with alcohol in a way that was super supportive because everybody else was doing it, right? Because if somebody wanted to do dry February, it would be a little more difficult because nobody else is on the trend. So it's just a month where, you know, social media and people across the globe were banning together to commit to a month of sobriety. How do I start dry January if I've never even gone a week without drinking? In the United States, particularly, drinking is a huge part of our culture. I think it's viewed as completely and totally normal to have, you know, some drinks to break off the weekend, um, to celebrate with friends and family and to decompress after work. So going with a whole month without drinking, I know can seem super daunting, especially in the culture that we live in. Um, my suggestion for people who are trying to go a whole month is to not consider the month itself, but rather consider it one day at a time. 24 hours, you know, that's the goal here is to just get one set of 24 hours of sobriety and try to do that, you know, hopefully tomorrow. My idea or my way of thinking about this is that like tomorrow is never even promised. So just trying to get through today without drinking, that's something that I can bite down and digest. So if you're out there and you're really scared because you've never gone a week without drinking, it's okay. That's totally normal. I think just thinking about it one day at a time is gonna be your best thought process and taking on a whole month of sobriety. How long does it take to feel better emotionally and physically after stopping drinking is going to vary from person to person. There are a lot of different factors that play into it. How much are you drinking, you know, on a given weekday, on a given week? How much are you drinking on average per month? Um, I think is a huge part of it. So, what that's gonna look like as far as getting sober is going to be different. Some things you can probably expect are, you know, a lot of irritable restlessness in the first few, I would say week. So maybe the first two weeks, you're gonna feel a wave of emotions that maybe you've never felt before. Maybe one day you're gonna have high highs and the next day you're gonna have low lows. And regardless, those are all very, very normal. Physically, your body's gonna purge alcohol. You know, even if you're not drinking in it in excess, um, when you're putting a substance like alcohol into your body consistently, whether it's like on a daily or weekly or even monthly basis, your body's going to purge it naturally. That's gonna make you feel a little icky, a little uncomfortable, but it does go away. You just have to ride it out. Should I tell people that I'm doing dry January or should I keep it to myself? Scream it from the rooftops. The more accountability, the better when trying to hit a milestone like this. I know from my own personal experience, the more people that I told, the more people I had in my corner to support me, especially with something like dry January, where so many people are doing it. I think it's really helpful to put it out there that you're doing dry January, not just for yourself, but for other people who are wanting to do dry January as well. I think the more support we all have, the better. So taking on something like dry January and making it known is gonna be your best pathway for success. How do I deal with the cravings or urge to drink, especially when I'm bored or stressed? Boredom and stress are two of the biggest trigger points for drinking. So totally get you there. I think the best way to navigate any emotion that you're gonna feel when trying sobriety is to pick up the phone and call somebody and get honest about how you're feeling and try your very best in that moment to get outside of yourself. Get on the phone with your mom, get on the phone with your friend, ask them how their day is doing. The best way we can get out of our own heads is to get into somebody else's. So checking in with someone else, I'm also a firm believer of move a muscle, change a thought. So going outside and being in nature or taking yourself on a walk, trying to exercise, work out, try a yoga class you've never done before is a great way to get out of those emotions. Our emotions can overtake us, but they're not always factual. And like I said, you know, it's super, super normal to feel all these intense waves of boredom and stress and happiness and joy and excitement and anger and rage when we're trying to get sober or we're trying to do dry January. And the best thing you can do is move your body, talk to somebody else, and just know that it's gonna be okay and it's okay to sit with these feelings. Should I avoid parties or going out when I'm trying to stay sober? I think this question really depends on your why. I think if you're someone who just wants to do dry January just to say, you know, hey, I did 30 months of no drinking, I don't think there's a problem here. I think it's totally normal, you know, to surround yourself with friends and family who maybe aren't doing dry January, um, but respect your dry January, right? But if you're somebody who's wanting to try this as maybe making it a way of life, then something I think worth considering is why are you doing this? And if you're trying to continue doing this, then I think protecting your early stage of sobriety is the most important, meaning which if parties or going out to bars and stuff like that can be super triggering for you, then avoiding those things at all costs is super important. I also think it's important to surround yourself with people who are gonna support you, not somebody who's gonna question why you're doing dry January, not somebody who's gonna question why it is that you're trying to get sober or explore your relationship with alcohol. Those aren't safe people that you need to have in your corner when you're first trying to get sober. But again, it's all about your why. If this is a fun and exciting activity for you that you want to bandwagon on, by all means, I think it's totally normal to go out and party and have fun and have a club soda with a lime at the bar. Otherwise, I think staying in and just enjoying the month of January can be super, super powerful. How do I stay motivated when everyone around me is still drinking? I think that, you know, January represents like a new leaf of life. Um, it it represents like a new, a new start to a new year. And I don't think there's anything wrong with taking 30 days to yourself if you need to. I think a lot of people, when they're sober curious or want to explore sobriety, they want to live their life the exact same way that they had before. And what they realize very quickly is like a compromise of sobriety is changing certain things about your lifestyle. And if one of those things happens to be maybe not going out as much or surrounding yourself with, you know, friends who party or drink really heavily, that might be a compromise worth making. And I also think it's a great time to explore your interests. Like if you're feeling unmotivated in your first 30 days, or if you're feeling unmotivated during dry January, you know, I'm a firm believer, you know, only boring people get bored. Go out there and find things that you love. You know, go to your local library and get a library card and do events at the local library. Go out and be in nature, go hiking, skiing, running, try a new yoga class. But also I think too, staying motivated is rooted in like, who am I doing this for? Why am I doing this? Do I want this for myself really? And exploring like your relationship with alcohol. I knew for me, when there were times when I questioned, like, is this something that I really want to do? I knew that alcohol took so much away from my life that taking it out of my life was only gonna bring great things. What if my partner doesn't want to do dry January with me? They have no obligation to, you know, at the end of the day, your sobriety is your own and no one else's. If you want to do 30 days without drinking, you can totally do it on your own. I think, you know, it would be super sweet and super awesome and super nice if everybody's partners and friends and family banded with them together and they all did dry January together. But at the end of the day, if if it's something you want to do and you have to do it alone, that's okay too. I think the best thing is like making sure that your partner is respecting you and respecting your decision not to. I think that's the the biggest thing to look for. Like, is this person respecting my boundaries? Or if, you know, if you guys are naturally just people who have wine with dinner, maybe switching out and making a fun mock tail together could be fun, or exploring like NA options. There's plenty of like non-alcoholic beers, non-alcoholic mock tails, you know, and mood drinks like that you can replace alcohol with and have an amazing time with your partner. And also, I think, too, something worth exploring is just things that you can do with your partner outside of drinking and going to bars, like other ways to connect, having fun activities, planning fun dates, um, stuff like that. How can I feel confident without alcohol? Or what if I realize I'm not? This is a very common experience for most people when they cut out alcohol. Alcohol is a notoriously abused substance for its ability to give people liquid courage. The reality that I had to face was that I am a completely different person, even when a drop of alcohol is in my body. And that is totally fucking okay. That is totally fine. And I think coming to that realization was really scary because I thought maybe, you know, my friends wouldn't like me if I didn't drink, or that people weren't going to find me interesting or funny or bubbly or outgoing if there wasn't alcohol involved in my life. And the reality is like a majority of those people loved me before they knew me drunk. And so reminding myself of that and also finding nuance in like who I am as a person and exploring like what it is that I really like, what it is that I really value, that self-exploration is so important. And I think the older that we get, the more important it is to like dig in deeper. So for me, it was a really exciting experience. It was really scary. But if you go to a bar sober and look around and think to yourself, is this really how I want people to perceive me? Is this really the true version of who I am? I did not like the version of myself that I was when I was drunk. I thought that that version of myself was the better self. And it took me getting sober to realize that this is really who I am and this is just enough. I am completely content with this person today. Is it normal to feel restless, lonely, or even sad without drinking? Absolutely. Absolutely. But one thing alcohol promises that it can never deliver is connection with other people. I used to think that the best way for me to connect with friends was over drinks, um, meeting somebody at a restaurant, having two, three, ten cocktails. I used to think that that was going to create a like a place where I could be more vulnerable or I could share feelings maybe that I wouldn't normally if I were sober. And the reality is like I'd wake up the next day and barely remembered what I shared or, you know, what the other person picked up on. It's definitely normal to feel a ton of emotions, especially like loneliness and sadness when you're trying to do dry something like dry January. But if you are feeling lonely and you are feeling sad, it's super important to get plugged in with some of your friends and just share where you're at. I know some people don't always, you know, have an outlet of people that they can reach out to. So even just finding one person to talk to is super important when you're feeling that way. But all in all, completely normal. That's the reason we use alcohol, is to numb a lot of these feelings to begin with. So taking it away, you're hit with a raw wave of emotions and sadness and loneliness are completely normal. They do not last. That is the uh, that is the beauty of it. They do not last. How do I reward myself without alcohol? Sweet tree. Um, for me, my reward system was super shot because I just constantly rewarded myself with like, oh, I had a really hard workout today. I did a great job at work. I'm gonna go to the bar and have a drink with friends later. And that quickly, you know, for me turned into something else. But I think that's pretty common for people these days to like have a hard work week and end it with, you know, a bottle of wine with friends. So my suggestion is just replacing that with something equally as positive, like whether it's just going and hanging out with friends in a different setting or going and getting a sweet treat. Um, I also think, too, that vocalizing that you're proud of yourself is super important. What we tell ourselves becomes our reality. Um, and if we're feeding ourselves shit like this is miserable, I hate this. Why am I doing this? Like, what is there to even be proud of? We start to believe shit like that. So I think talking to yourself um in a way that's uplifting is super important too. Like telling yourself, hey, I've made it 48 hours without drinking. That's awesome. I'm really proud of you. And that a lot of that starts with self-talk. You can write yourself motivational quotes on your mirror. Those work. I know for a fact. Those mantras, you think it doesn't, and you put it up there and you're gonna forget about it. But if you're reading something positive on your mirror every morning, you're gonna start to believe it. Where can I meet sober or other sober curious people? This is a great question. Um, there are sober people all around you that want you to join them. And I know that from experience. Um, social media is an amazing tool. I always encourage people to check out TikTok because there's such a community on TikTok. There's such a community on Instagram, on Facebook. There are just people crawling all over these websites trying to find other sober people in their area to connect with. So starting out there, I also think that if you are wanting to do dry January, I encourage people to get involved in some sort of fitness or exercise regimen, whether it's just going on walks, joining a walking club, joining a running club, trying out a new yoga studio, because what I have found in my own personal journey is that a lot of people who are in the fitness and exercise space are also sober curious or sober themselves. And it's a great way to get connected with people who are like-minded and on a similar journey. I love a good walk club, right? Like I have friends that I go on walks with now. But if you really, if you don't have that and you're looking for that, just go on Google or go on your preferred search engine and look up walking groups near me. There's also Facebook pages. I don't know, it varies state from state. It varies state to state, but normally there's Facebook pages of, for example, sober people in Madison, Wisconsin that you can get connected with and plugged in. And then if you're really, really wanting to do this, there is a group of people out there in a 12-step program who would be more than happy to get plugged in with you. Whether this is just something you're curious about or something you want to do as a lifestyle or lifelong journey, they are there to help you. What if dry January makes me realize I might actually need help? The first step to any problem is admitting that the problem exists. So you're already halfway there. I think from there you have a few options, one of which, do I need to go to treatment? If so, how do I do that? What do I do? Um, do I go on a search engine and look it up? You could. You could go to recovery.com and look up a treatment center in your area, depending on what it is that you're looking for, whether it's solely just alcohol or substances. They have a plethora of resources on there. Uh, is it something that, you know, maybe hasn't gotten that bad yet, but I could see it later down the road becoming a serious issue in my life? If that's the case, there are 12-step programs set in place that you don't have to sign up, you don't have to pay, you just show up. Um, and getting plugged in with people there is super important. And I think, you know, the biggest thing when you're experiencing this is to not do this alone. Reaching out for help to anyone that you trust is gonna be the best thing that you can do for yourself if you're in this position. It took a lot of self-isolation for me and dealing with this and torturing myself back and forth. Is this really an issue? Or am I making too big of a deal out of this before I actually reached out and got help? And amazing, wonderful things have come from me getting help. I know it can be super scary to consider like, wow, maybe I might have to do this for real, for real, and not just for the month of January. And that's totally okay. Just remind yourself you, you know, start somewhere. It doesn't have to don't think about forever, but start somewhere. Reach out for help. There is help all around you. You just don't even know it yet. And you won't know until you ask. Thank you guys so much for listening. And for more resources, check out recovery.com.