Vital Compliance Insights
Healthcare regulatory compliance resource
Vital Compliance Insights
Caregiving Series Episode 1: Introductions
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Welcome to Verity's Caregiving Podcast Series! Join cohosts Anne Blust and Allan Stegemann as they navigate the crucial, compassionate, and complicated world of caregiving. Through sharing personal stories and enlisting guests from different facets of the caregiving world, learn from and relate to other humans experiencing the many ups and downs that come with caring for others.
www.verityteam.com
Welcome And Series Purpose
SPEAKER_00The views or opinions expressed in this podcast are for informational purposes only, not intended as legal or professional advice, and may not represent those of Verity Consulting. Although we make strong efforts to make sure our information is accurate at the time the podcast episode was recorded, Verity Consulting cannot guarantee that all information in this podcast is always correct, complete, or up to date. All information in this podcast is subject to change without notice.
SPEAKER_03Welcome everybody. Hello. It's our first podcast. We're doing it. How exciting? Welcome to Verity's Podcast on Caregiving, our Caregiving series. My name is Ann Blist. I will be your host for this session. With me is Anilyn Stengman. Say hi, Alan.
SPEAKER_01Hello, Ann. Hello, audience.
Verity’s Background And Host Intros
SPEAKER_03Hello, everybody. Hello, world. Um the initial thoughts behind this first podcast is to introduce you all to what we will be talking about, as well as give you more background information on Verity and then specifically Alan and what brought this podcast to fruition in the first place, what we hope to accomplish here. To give you a short background, and I am blessed. You will learn more about me as we go through this series. Some things that we are hoping to explore here in the podcast is what is caregiving? What does that role look like? What do caregivers themselves need? What do the per people receiving care as well as their family need? Who are caregivers? What do they do? What's it like to be one? What's it like to work with one? Really exemplifying and highlighting that this is a two-way street. Caregivers need care. Caregivers are providing care. How can we help them? How can they help us? So let's get into it. I'd like to get into Alan and his background. So, Alan, why don't you go ahead and introduce yourself?
SPEAKER_01Well, I'm Alan Stegman. I'm currently the president of Verity Consulting. Verity Consulting is was formerly the Long-Term Care Institute. We've been around about 26 years. And I'll talk in a couple of minutes here about what we do just to give you a little background. Before I do that, I wanted to just talk a little bit about Anne as the host. Oh. She is has kind of a unique set of qualifications to be the host. She's her degree is in performing arts. So she's pretty comfortable sitting in front of the mic, but probably much more comfortable than I am.
SPEAKER_03Probably.
SPEAKER_01Probably. And she's also a caregiver and has been a case manager. So she's uniquely qualified to be a person hosting this and to be doing interviews with folks. And we'll be doing hopefully be doing interviews with a number of people across these podcasts that are involved in caregiving.
SPEAKER_03That's the plan.
Alan’s Career In Care Quality
SPEAKER_01That's the plan. So a little about my background. Currently, as I said, I'm president of Verity Consulting, and we've been around 26 years. We actually started the company to do monitoring of healthcare providers that were essentially in trouble with the federal government for fraud and particularly on the quality of care delivery systems. So we've been doing that for a long time. We've also done regulatory survey work for the Department of Veterans Affairs. We've done direct consulting with healthcare providers themselves and also with the liability insurance industry. So we have a variety of things we've been doing. And it's it's it's been interesting, and this is sort of a new offshoot of doing some podcasts. We've already had podcasts posted, you'll be able to see some. So that was one thing I did. Prior to that, I actually worked in the largest residential developmental disability center in the state of Wisconsin. And I like to say that I've been around this stuff now, healthcare, in various ways for the better part of 50 years. And I always joke that it goes all the way back to 1964 when I was in high school. I'm on this high school debate team. And the debate issue that year was should we have a national healthcare system? And I took the affirmative that year, arguing for it. And one year later, the federal government passed Medicare and Medicaid in 1965. So now I'm on Medicare, so I've come full circle, and I've worked almost my entire life working with Medicare providers. So it's it's something I'm I'm pretty used to.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01Why are we doing this? Well, as I said, I have a personal interest, and that goes back to the to my wife, Mary, person that I met way back in high school. We would have been married 55 years this year, but unfortunately she passed away in March after about dementia. And for about the past five and a half, a little more than five and a half years, Mary went through dementia. It was a long journey for us. And uh all I can say is she was the love of my life. We were together a long, long time, and that experience as a caregiver with her informs much of what we're going to be talking about here today and kind of kicks off what we're going to be doing, hopefully, across the set of podcasts.
SPEAKER_02Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01As I said, I met her back in high school. She was diagnosed with dementia actually formally during COVID, the COVID pandemic.
SPEAKER_03Like you needed another thing.
A Personal Story: Mary And Dementia
SPEAKER_01Yes, and it certainly made it more difficult to know what we were looking at at the time. Probably her dementia went back a year or more before that. It started. And her dementia was probably a mix of Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. She was a type 1 diabetic, and that probably had somewhat of an effect. I asked Dan if I should tell a little story about how I met Mary, and maybe I'll do that. Friends have heard it before, but I think it'll give you more of a sense on a personal level of Mary and my connection. I first met her in a high school chemistry class at the very beginning of the of the year. Of course, we were making the materials we'd need for the year, mostly glasswork. And so we'd made glass tubing and glass stirring rods and collected all we needed. And the first experiment, quote, experiment you did was blowing through a glass piece of glass tubing into a beaker that had lime water in it. And of course, when you do that, you create a precipitate from the carbon dioxide that you're expelling into the lime water. And we were set up with partners, and my partner and I were backed up to Mary and her partner behind us. And so everybody had done their experiment and, of course, cleared their pre precipitate. But Mary and her partner kept saying, Ours doesn't work. Ours doesn't work. So I turned around and looked, and I just said casually, you should really blow through the a piece of glass tubing and not your solid steering rod, which uh made her laugh endlessly. And she had a smile, a killer smile, and no no fear and no uh feeling of being self-conscious. Self self-conscious about this at all. So that was the beginning of it. And as I always like to say, uh we uh it was it was chemistry.
SPEAKER_03Um indeed. So you really have a full circle as far as not only where you've gone in your life, but your viewpoints on caregiving in the field, both personally and professionally. Um professionally, obviously, first, but personal caregiving intersperses in our life, whether we like it to or not, most of the time don't. However, it's a part there. Then that leads into kind of what would you say are the differences that might not be so obvious between working with caregivers both per personally and professionally, as well as that can give a little segue into how you and I met.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely. Well, there is a difference, and and obviously I'd spent a fair amount of my life watching professional caregivers. So I had a pretty good sense of how that worked, or at least I thought I did. And I was to learn a lot more as as we went through time. But let me start with the with the personal side, because I think hopefully many of the people listening to this will not just be caregivers, but maybe other folks that are going to need caregivers. And I think you need to understand what it what it feels like to be a caregiver out there on your own with someone you really care about. It might be a spouse, it might be a child, it might be a relative, it might be a friend.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01So in any of those situations, I think the the first thing you need to understand is that as a as a personal caregiver, you're you're delivering care, doing activities, but you're really also a case manager to that person. You know, you're responsible for setting up their appointments, getting their supplies, getting their medications, talking with their various providers. And nowadays that's oftentimes not just in person, but on the phone or via my chart on you know online. So it there's a there's a lot to that. There's a lot of work that you have to do just you know, on top of all of the day-to-day care activities you're providing. So that's that's a big part of it, and you need just to understand that. The the other big part of being a personal caregiver is the emotional connection. There's a, as you know, a big emotional connection, but also your relationship, and that is affected in many, many many, many ways. People who are undergoing whatever the the process of of their disease, whether it's dementia, whether it's cancer, whether it's a heart problem, whatever. There may be anger, there may be embarrassment, there's a feeling of loss. All these things that they're losing, you have to deal with. You have to be part of that. You have to understand what they're going through. I give the example of one of the first and hardest things I had to deal with was taking away Mary's car keys, realizing that she could no longer drive, and having to deal with that was was difficult. And for her, it was very difficult, you know, to lose that ability to be able to drive. So that's just a very simple example of of things. And of course, as time go went on, yeah, she began to lose her ability to do a lot of her own care. And you have to take that on, and then you deal with embarrassment and all the other things that go along with that.
SPEAKER_03Sure.
SPEAKER_01So that's a that's a difficult thing.
SPEAKER_03Nobody likes to accept those things.
Personal Caregiving: Roles And Emotions
SPEAKER_01Absolutely not. It's it's really difficult. So there's a focus on care, then. I mean, you're focusing all of your energy on that person and everything you're doing for them. And what gets lost in that is your life, your care, our yep, your self-care. You become secondary, there's no doubt about that. So you need to understand that and and reckon with that as best you can. And I I guess what I I would say is you for initially, at least initially, you're your own support.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01So that's that becomes difficult. I mean, you're you don't have unlimited strength and unlimited. Nobody does. Nobody does. And and and your energy wears out, and you get to the point where you decide, I need help. I need help. And that you know leads you to professional caregivers. So let me kind of jump to that a little bit about personal caregivers. I've when I watched professional caregivers in all kinds of settings over about 45 years, in hospitals and nursing homes, and then in in in-home, with home health agencies, with hospices. I've uh watched it in clinics as part of our work. So it's it's it's something it's not something that I I have not seen. Um I've been up against it many times.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01And I used to spend a lot of time with our staff in the field, actually out there with them, so I could see what was going on. And I would can tell you that I've seen outstanding, just excellent care in the you know, clinical and residential settings. But I've also seen some pretty awful stuff too.
SPEAKER_03So I say it is an e er.
SPEAKER_01So we've we've seen that as well. When people ask me, you know, what makes a really good professional caregiver? When you see the people who really do a great job, what do you think that is? Well, I think it's a couple of things. The first thing is how invested are they in the people they're caring for? I think the the best caregivers I've seen really know the patients, the residents, whoever they're working with, they get to know those people and they know them as human beings. And they get try to learn their backstory, their life. And so they have a connection there, a very human connection. So it a big part of this is the investment they put into that. The best caregivers are also well-trained care caregivers. They know what their job is, they know what they have to do, they know all of the techniques for the kind of care they're delivering. And I like to always say they've been competency tested, meaning that they've not just been trained, but somebody who knows what they're supposed to be doing observes them doing it before they're turned loose to do it on their own. So competency testing is a big part of it, and that they get appropriate supervision. The best caregivers know that somebody's going to be checking on them, and somebody does check on them. They're not just turned loose forever, you know, with nobody over ever overseeing what they do. So that's important. And finally, I guess, in professional caregiving settings, so we're talking mainly then about residential care, but it could be even in home, people delivering that care have a reasonable number of clients that they're delivering care to. So they're not overwhelmed with so many people that they don't have the time not only to deliver the care, but to do it in a a very direct, caring way where they're interacting with that person. So that's that's those, I think, are the are the key things when I think about professional caregivers.
SPEAKER_03Sure.
SPEAKER_01It relates to any caregiving, but professional caregivers hopefully have gotten all that training and and supervision to make them outstanding people.
SPEAKER_03Sure. Competent, caring, qualified. They they they care. The caregivers care. That's such an essential piece of the puzzle. When did you know, having all of this again, kind of extensive background, that it was time to enlist some additional hands here?
SPEAKER_01Well, we had we had probably about an eight-month period, I I as I look back on it, where Mary's Mary was changing. She started slowly, but then there was a fairly quick change. And one of the first things that was a major change was lack of sleep.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01With her dementia, she was up and wanted to be up all the time. Sometimes was particularly at night, she was confused, often, you know, wanting to go home, not realizing she was home, things like that, or wanting to go to the restaurant at 2 a.m. in the morning. So we were up, and I tell people that we probably had an eight-month period where we were lucky to get two to three night, two to three hours of sleep a night.
SPEAKER_03It's not a lot.
What Makes A Great Professional Caregiver
SPEAKER_01Not a lot. So we were pretty worn out. And then what began also to change was her ability to do what were called her activities of daily living. You know, eating, toileting. She even dressing became began to become a problem. So those were all things I was having to deal with, along with her as a type one diabetic, all of her diabetic care. And she was using a pump, diabetic pump. So I'm having to deal with that every three days, and and then each day having to check with each meal and making sure that you know the right bolus was given of insulin on her pump and for each meal and whatever. So there was a lot to that. And it, you know, it's it it it it became tiring. She had inevitably, yeah. Yes, and she had a lot of good friends who who helped out. I mean, they I I have to uh I just can't say enough about her close friends who would come, give me a break, take her to burn to lunch when they could, spend time with her. But over time that became more and more difficult. She was more confused, sometimes more angry. And for people who weren't trained in this area, you know, it becomes it becomes a lot, a lot of responsibility. So I think a lot of those things uh led to the fact that by oh fall of 2022, I was pretty worn out and decided I I needed some help. And a nurse that worked for me for many years had just had some caregivers working with her parents.
SPEAKER_03Shout out, Donna.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, Donna Cop, a wonderful person. And Donna called me and said, you know, I have these these two folks that did some work for us and they're they're really good. If you need, you know, some respite time, they might be able to help you out. So I I called them and they came and we did a little kind of interview of each other and got a sense of what Mary needed, and I got a sense of them. And we so we we set up an arrangement where they would come in for three hours, three times a week. So Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, they would come in, and that would give me a chance to go to the office for a little while since I was still working. Also try to get some of my appointments done and just give me a little bit of a break.
SPEAKER_03Take care of yourself, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, exactly. And so this started in December of 2022, and this went on for a few weeks. These two folks were were good, they were they were mainly doing things with Mary, just spending time with her. Um and at that point, Mary could still do some some work with jigsaw puzzles a little bit. She she was coloring, doing some things like that, and so they they would do that with her. And so then one day, maybe about a month and a half or two months in, early in 2023.
SPEAKER_03January.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, January 2023, a young woman appeared and said, Oh, I'm gonna be joining the team here.
SPEAKER_03And spoiler alert.
SPEAKER_01Spoiler alert, right? Her name was Ann Blessed. I'm looking at her right now across the table. And so I'm I met Ann for the first time, and as I've said to Ann a number of times now, she had a big beaming smile, much like my wife, and the same kind of joie de vive. I could I could see it. And the two of them got along very well, and very quickly Ann took over as the primary caregiver assisting me. So she was doing this three days a week, and then we slowly upped the number of hours each time, and that was working out pretty well until we got to, and I'm not a big guy on dates, but there were a few that will never leave my mind, and one is Memorial Day of 2024.
SPEAKER_02Yes, we were.
When To Bring In Help
SPEAKER_01Where here at home, Mary fell, fractured her hip, and a lot of things changed. She had to have surgery, had to have a what they call a nail placed in her hip to stabilize it, and ended up with a really intense delirium post-surgery, which is not unusual. So while she was in the hospital for the week getting ready to be discharged, obviously the folks at the hospital were asking me what facility I was going to send her to for rehab. And I said, She's not going to a facility, she's going home. And I then contacted my case manager of the company I was using with where Ann was employed. And I said, I need round the clock care. And it was an effort, but the case manager Andy put the group together, and we ended up ultimately with nine people who were sharing time here around the clock with me, taking care of Mary for about four months. And it was it was difficult at first. She was very angry and very confused. Um delirium made it even worse. But she slowly came out of it. We had to get her up and walk her every day, and then so it was it was it it's it as you know the old saying of it takes a village. Well, it does take a village when you're caring for someone at home. So here we were, and that went on until uh about four months passed, and then we were able to cut back a bit, a bit, a bit, and so we would I would have someone come in in the morning, help me get her up, probably stop during the day in case I needed to help help me change her and help her get ready at night for bed. And then I had four nights of the week where I had somebody here overnight, gave me a chance to finally sleep. Hey, and then the other three nights I had married by myself. And this went on fairly well, but we could see over time the effects of dementia. She began to lose weight, her communication skills were, you know, she was losing some of that, talking less. But uh I have to tell you, the caregivers were outstanding, they interacted very, very well with her, and she they kept her as as alert and involved with everything that they could. And I I can't say enough about that. And Ann is a great example. Ann and Mary had such a connection, whether or not whether they were playing some kind of crazy game, listening to music, eating the raw carrots, uh Cheers in baby carrots, yeah, and or watching Carol Burnett, which was uh Mary Ann favorite, whatever, they were always engaged. So that's that's kind of what it would how we got to where we were. And I was lucky I was had the resources to do this. Sure. A lot of people don't, but I had the resources to do this and found great caregivers, and it worked out.
SPEAKER_03I agree. Um this is obviously a a situation nobody wants to think about being in, and how grateful to have stellar individuals that came along and helped make a tough situation a little less tough. And ones that, again, going back to caregivers that really care. We could have a and probably will have a whole other section on navigating this convoluted system that we that everyone is dealing with. Kind of going off of that, are there any things you wish you would have known during this process of having these people in your house?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's a that's a great question, and looking back on it now, I, you know, I I'd been around this this stuff for 45 years and probably thought I knew a lot about it, but it's very different when it's on the personal level.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And I I think uh the thing that I would leave with anyone who who's going into this situation or is in this situation is you're gonna get tired.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
Building A Home Care Team
SPEAKER_01You're gonna get frustrated at times, but you have to cut yourself some slack. And it, you know, it took a while for me to to understand that. You know, the old saying of the perfect is the enemy of the good is true because you you really want everything to be as perfect as you can make it, but you just can't do everything. You can't make everything perfect, particularly on your own. And that that leads to the the biggest thing I think that I learned and I that I want to share with people in this situation. Don't wait too long to get help. Yeah, you have to, I think probably I waited too long, and I think in most cases, probably people do. They they think, well, I can keep doing this, but at some point you just have to decide I gotta have help. Sure. And and and you gotta go for that.
SPEAKER_03How you know you started to touch on burnout and how common that is, and how unfortunately there's almost an inevitability. However, what ways are there to mitigate that?
SPEAKER_01Well I think first of all, when when you first start out, you always have to find a way to get a few hours away. Whether, and if you have friends or somebody that can help you, like I said, we we had some good friends, and and our son Eric, I should point out, also was was key to this. He did a great job with his mom. Yeah he would smell me at times, and that's that was hard. You know, he was he was working. So you have to be able to find a way to to get some time away. And it's also important to have people to talk to about your feelings and what's going on with you. And I had close friends that you know I I still see now every weekend, and they were they're always there, always wanting to know, you know, what how things were going and what they could do.
SPEAKER_03And shout out to the Xenos.
SPEAKER_01Yep, shout out to the Xenos, Bob and Mary Zeno. So it's it's an important, it's an important thing to think about. You've gotta get you've gotta get that that support, even if it's support just for you emotionally to think through what you're going through.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_01And then I can't I can't overdo sleep.
SPEAKER_03Please sleep.
SPEAKER_01You gotta sleep. And with dementia, it was it was difficult. Other other situations may be difficult, just as difficult because you're dealing with other things, but you've got to find a way to get some sleep, get caregivers in there that can give you a time a chance to relax and just close your eyes, even if it's for a few hours. Yes. So you can kind of recharge your batteries.
SPEAKER_03100%. The old saying of you can't take care of anybody else if you don't take care of yourself, as difficult as that may be. Another thing that can sometimes be difficult is having people that you don't know in your house caring for your loved one. How do you set, maintain, and also just work with other individuals and keeping boundaries and building, you know, a comfortable space for both parties?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's interesting too. Well, I think you know, it's it's going to be individual with every situation and with the comfort level that you have with the people coming in. Sure. I mean, there are some natural boundaries in a house. There are probably some places that the caregivers don't need to be. They need to be where we you know where the person receiving care is. They need to probably have access to the kitchen, the laundry, bathroom, whatever. So there's those natural boundaries. But the other, the other kind of boundary I think you're thinking about here, Ann, is is the connection you have to those people on a one-to-one basis.
SPEAKER_03Yes, very much. So you had mentioned that the best caregivers take the time to get to know who they're providing care to. So riff on that a little bit.
Hip Fracture, Delirium, And 24/7 Care
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think that that's that's an important thing. You have to be able to tell the caregivers a bit about the person they're caring for. Not that just that they have this problem that they have to deal with, but give them an idea about who that person is, what their life was like, what they are, what that what they're like as a person, how they interact, how they communicate, those kinds of things. One of the things that I think I learned a lot about with Mary is caregivers need to understand that people oftentimes who have a problem, and dementia was a good example, you think they don't can't communicate or may not understand. And I think they understand a lot more than people give them credit for. And a lot of what you see in terms of behaviors and whatever are a result of the failure to communicate, their inability to communicate. You can actually see sometimes they're thinking they're they want to get it out and they can't get it out.
SPEAKER_03How frustrating.
SPEAKER_01It's very frustrating. So I think caregivers need to know who they're working with. And and you and you, as a person who's responsible for your loved one, need to help them understand that. That's a big role you have to take on uh to get them to understand that. The other thing that, and this is personally how I handle things, and and not everyone's gonna be comfortable this way, but I felt that caregivers they're providing care to my loved one, but they also need a bit of care. Um on you know, they need to be need to be understood. Uh I think you need to understand who they are, learn their life story a bit. In fact, and I tried to do that with everybody who cared for Mary. I could write an interesting, probably screenplay or short stories about every one of those folks and their backstories, which are fascinating. So it's it's important to know that so you you know what they're like and and what they're up against while they're providing care for your loved one. I also tried to make them the home their home while they were here. So one thing is I, of course, was doing all the cooking for Mary, and I don't mind cooking, and I in fact like cooking when there are more people. So when I could, I always had meals available to the caregivers when they were here. And if they wanted to eat, join us. And some people were very comfortable with that. Some people, it took them a while to get used to doing that.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01Was not something they normally do. And also I always had treats and drinks and everything available for them in the kitchen and then the refrigerator, and you know, whether you know I was up or sleeping or whatever, the house is yours, you know, do what you need to do to feel comfortable. And, you know, when you're caring for my person, I'm gonna care for you as best I can to make it to make the situation good for everybody.
SPEAKER_03You did an excellent job at that. And I would be one that's not afraid to eat. So very appreciated. And of course, it's all personable, whatever your comfort level is. Do you have any further advice for individuals, you know, in addition to obviously getting sleep and taking care of yourself, for individuals who are either maybe beginning the journey of looking for care or are already maybe deep in the throes of it?
SPEAKER_01Well, I I've already talked about, you know, you you're gonna want to kind of interview the people initially, just get a sense of who they are. And as I said, try to get their backstories, you know, sure. And do it as as early as you can, you know. What what do you do? Where have you worked, that kind of thing, but also kind of, you know, what's your family like? You know, what is what do you do outside when you're not caregiving? You can learn a lot about people by knowing about things that are important to them outside of the job that they do.
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_01So that that's really important. The other thing that I think, and not everybody's gonna be comfortable with this or can do this, but at least in the home setting, not so much in the residential setting, I'll talk about that in a minute. But in the home setting, work side by side with caregivers as much as you can.
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_01So be part of the care that's given if you can. And it has sort of a couple of benefits to it. One of them is you get to see them at work, it lets you evaluate a bit about them and how they interact with your loved one. So that's that's important. But it also, I think, gives your loved one a feeling that you're not abandoning them just to a caregiver. You know, you're still there, you're still part of this. And I think everybody then begins to understand that it's a team. We're all on the team, and you're on the team as well. So we're, you know, we're just all part of the same team. So I I think that's a really important thing.
SPEAKER_03We all are learning from one another.
SPEAKER_01Yes, absolutely.
SPEAKER_03Very much so. Going off of that, do you have any advice for the caregivers themselves? Those, whether they are experienced working within the home, whether they, you know, are looking for homes. What do you have to say to them?
SPEAKER_01Well, I'd say this to them as I'd say to any caregiver in any setting, including the residential setting.
SPEAKER_02Sure.
SPEAKER_01Be patient and kind with the people you're caring for. Be as patient as kind as you can. And that's, you know, we all want to be treated that way. And treat them with dignity. The caregivers I had were outstanding in treating Mary with dignity. And that I can't, I can't uh over-emphasize that.
SPEAKER_03It's imperative.
SPEAKER_01It is. Um, and again, a lot of this it goes back to learning about that person who's receiving the care, what what they're like and what their life is, so you understand them. Smile.
SPEAKER_03Goes a long way, everyone.
SPEAKER_01And I had caregivers who, as a group, were pretty smiley. Yeah. Yeah, good smiling people. And I should I should mention that all of the all of the caregivers except one of Mary's caregivers were females.
SPEAKER_03Yes, and not uncommon.
Protecting Sleep And Preventing Burnout
SPEAKER_01Not uncommon. That's that's a very common thing. And I'm a big proponent of women, so I you know, I'm always been supportive, but we had a one young man who also took care of Mary, and it was his first real experience as a caregiver. His name was Irvin, and wonderful. Turned out to be just a wonderful guy. Mary really liked him.
SPEAKER_03Shout out.
SPEAKER_01Yep. And I think I learned a lot just from each caregiver. I learned a lot of things, whether it was the techniques they were using, the products they wanted to use. Oh, yeah, those kinds of things were important. And just from each of them, their own way of interacting with her and making her feel comfortable about them. And one of the things, I guess one other thing I would mention along those lines is when you are providing care, whatever the activity you're doing, make sure you're telling that person who's receiving the care what you're going to do and why you're doing it. Even if you think they don't understand it, do it anyway, because they probably understand a lot more than you think they do. Yes. Make them feel comfortable, make them understand, and let the family or whoever's around that's watching this also understand what it is you're doing and why you're doing it.
SPEAKER_03Very much so. Yes, there is reasoning behind it all. Also, nobody likes for something to just happen without a little heads up. So gentleness, kindness, um 100% agree.
SPEAKER_01And I have one last thing, I guess I'll just point out, and that is particularly when you're in, well, you might see it in even in a residential setting, but in at home, in a home setting, be aware of the room. There's going to be a lot of stuff going on, and there may be other family members there or friends visiting or whatever, and there may be some different kinds of interactions or emotional things going on among those people.
SPEAKER_03Quite a few.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and that's you know, be aware of that because that may have an effect on what's going on with the person you're caring for, and just what's going to happen in terms of what you might have to do in that situation to make it and make things comfortable. So you have to always be as a caregiver reading the room a bit about who's there and what they're feeling.
SPEAKER_03I think that's an important tidbit for life in general. So thank you so much for your personal insights, Alan. Thank you also, everybody, for listening. Verity again, which Anilyn spoke about in the beginning. Verity's consulting tagline is improving performance, improving lives. We very much hope that this podcast series reflects that and then is helpful to you. On the upcoming podcast, we're gonna dive into some more caregiving-specific conversations with caregivers themselves. You will learn a little bit more about me, which I'm sure you're all chomping at the bit, and hoping to be a helpful, supportive guide to everyone because it is becoming more and more prevalent. More and more people need care for their loved ones, and also important to take care of yourself. So if there are any topics, also that would be of interest, please contact Verity. We'd love to hear about it and hope that you will join us for our next episode. Thank you again, Alan.
SPEAKER_01Thank you, ma'am.