Early Career Spotlight: Finding Hope Wellness Center's Mrs. Alexus Samuel-Lopez

In this Early Career Spotlight, Dr. Lindsay Frey sits down with Mrs. Alexus “Lexi” Samuel-Lopez to talk about her journey into the mental health field, what inspired her to become a therapist, and the heart behind the work she does today.

Known to many of her younger clients as “Mrs. Lexi,” Lexi works with children and families at Finding Hope Wellness Center. She uses play-based, developmentally appropriate approaches to help children strengthen emotional regulation, coping skills, confidence, social skills, and relationships. Lexi especially enjoys creating a warm, supportive space where children can feel comfortable being themselves while learning new skills and growing along the way.

In this episode, you’ll get to know Lexi beyond her bio, hear more about how she got started in the field, and learn what she loves about working with children and families.

Want to learn more about Mrs. Lexi?
Visit her page: Meet Mrs. Lexi Samuel-Lopez

Interested in scheduling with Mrs. Lexi?
Email us at admin@findinghopewellnesscenter.com to get started.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Welcome to Mental Health Without Borders, the Global Wellness Podcast with Dr. Lindsay Frey. I'm Dr. Frey, a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Finding Health Wellness Center. Today's episode is part of our Early Career Therapist Spotlight series, where I sit down with one of our amazing therapists on our team so that you can get to know the humans behind the amazing work that they're doing. These conversations are going to be more lighthearted, honest, and they're meant to give you a feel for each therapist's personality, style, and heart for this profession. So I'm very excited for you to meet today's guest. Today I'm joined by Mrs. Alexis Samuel Lopez, or as we love to call her, Miss Lexi, one of our therapists here at Finding Help. She primarily works with children and adolescents, and I'm so glad to have her here today so that you can get to know her better. Welcome, Miss Lexi. Oh, thank you for having me, Dr. Frey. Absolutely. We are so glad that she's a part of the team. She's been a part of the team for about a year now. And so I like to ask this question first because a lot of therapists' journey first got started somewhere. There's a reason that they came into this field. I know I have a story that I've shared multiple times on the podcast on why I became a therapist. But what about you? Honestly, it's a passion career. So what made you want to become a therapist? And when did you know that you wanted to become a therapist?

SPEAKER_01 1:49

Yes, it starts off more of a somber story. My mom passed away when I was 12. And when we talk about being in the trenches, that was me. It was hard. School became more difficult. Balancing my relationships and all my responsibilities became very difficult. I didn't know what to do. So thankfully, I had my school counselor come and speak with me. And it was very uncomfortable at first. I don't want to talk to a stranger. Who are you? And slowly over time, she began just not only one, you know, giving me tools to help me better deal with the trauma and deal with the grief of losing my mom, but also it became someone I could confide in, someone I could just talk to when my days were hard because I didn't have that at home. And so I spoke with her on a weekly basis. I joined a grief group. And because of that, I grew up and I was like, how can I help people the way that I was helped? That first became through a CPS role and I was a foster care case manager. And with that, I was on the ground doing the work, seeing, you know, how these kiddos were affected. But I wasn't actually making the change myself. I was referring out to it. So once I finally decided that it was time to get my master's, I said, okay, I want to be that change. And that's what led me to becoming a therapist and being able to, like I said, be in that role of helping rather than just referring to the help. So started out somber, but I think I was able to really put a positive spin on it.

SPEAKER_00 3:17

That's really amazing. I appreciate you sharing that. It's something that really resonates with me because that's very similar to how my story started too with tragedy, having friends passing away in car accidents when I was, you know, 14 through 16 years old. And the person that helped me was my school guidance counselor. So I don't even know if you know that. But just because mental health wasn't what it was and that was so easily accessible, I'm really, really grateful that you had somebody at that time. Because as we know as therapists, that is one of the most difficult things that a child can go through is losing a parent. It's just so foundational for their development to learn so much from their parents. So that had to have been so hard for you. And I guarantee that when you sit across from a child that's experienced bereavement or the loss of a parent, you can connect with them in such a deep way, you know, compared to somebody that might not have that exact same experience. And I don't know if you've had that happen yet, but certainly you can connect with the feelings of grief or the feelings of loss in a deeper way. And no doubt your clients are going to feel that. Yeah. And so you're in the right place. And I'm glad that you used it. You know, something I've always said is my pain was able to be used for a purpose. And I feel like that's very similar with you. And you did that. You made the pain turn into purpose for your life to be able to help others. And I think that's fantastic.

SPEAKER_01 4:43

I appreciate that. I think even from outside of their roles of or the realm of grief, even just being able to work with kiddos and their parents to talk about appreciation for what they have, I think is really important. You know, a lot of the kiddos that I see now are have behavioral issues, have difficulties related to respecting their parent and to kind of give them that lens as well, like being appreciative of what you have and also how the importance of strengthening that relationship with your parents, because we do only have them for such a short amount of time, unfortunately, I think has really been helpful not only for myself and my personal growth, but also for my current clients as well.

SPEAKER_00 5:21

Absolutely. And just because you mentioned that, I know in the introduction I said that you work with children and adolescents, but can you tell us a little bit more specifically about who you like to work with?

SPEAKER_01 5:31

Yeah, so I love kiddos, I love teens, but I've also been kind of molding myself into the realm of family therapy a lot lately. With all of my kiddos from the very beginning, I've done a lot of parent training. I think that it doesn't matter the work that we do here if it doesn't generalize to home and school. Then it doesn't matter how great of a therapist I am if those behaviors aren't seen in other domains of their life. So I've been doing a lot of parent training and I found that there's such a need for family therapy, getting parents and especially teens and younger kiddos together and really ironing out, okay, what is the real conflict here? What's really going on? Is this a communication issue? Is there something that we can work out together to make it just more balanced overall at home? And when I do see that, when we do get those sessions going, I am seeing a decrease in behaviors. I'm seeing better communication between children and their parents. I'm seeing more understanding and more patient parents. So yes, right now it's been children, teens. I do see some young adults as well, but I'm really focusing on parent therapy, parent training, and family therapy going forward.

SPEAKER_00 6:39

Okay, fantastic. And for as long as I've worked with kids, I understand that it's a system, right? So we're not only working with the child, we're working the whole system if we really want to see true and meaningful and lasting change. So I personally appreciate that you're kind of going into the realm of family work and also parent education, because I often find that there's a lot of very well-meaning parents out there, but parenting doesn't come with a guidebook. And so sometimes they just need direction, sometimes they need a little bit of encouragement and a non-judgmental space. And so we often encourage them. It's okay that you don't know this. This is a really hard situation. And you might be parenting multiple kiddos that have different personalities and different needs. So let's just go on the journey with you. And we are here to help you, you know, as you get through it. So we're really grateful that you're here and you're taking on that space, you know, for the practice. That's phenomenal and it's so important. So as you've kind of rounded out your first year here, I would love to know what's something that you wish you knew during your first year as a therapist, because it does come with a lot of change, a lot of growth. I honestly feel like the learning happens practically in front of you versus yes, you can learn knowledge in a classroom, but you're really putting it into place in the therapy realm. So what do you think about that?

SPEAKER_01 7:59

Yeah, so I'll admit my first year, I was really hard on myself. And again, coming from that CPS background, I'm very solutions focused, very, okay, how can we meet our goals? And it doesn't matter how we get there, we just need to get there. And I was very hard on myself when I didn't see always linear progress, you know. So I guess if I could go back and start over, I'd be more compassionate for myself, number one, be more a little bit more patient and understand that just because we're not seeing, you know, direct progress doesn't mean that it's not effective for our client. I think what I've realized the most is that some of these kiddos, some of my clients in general, even my young adults, just need a space. They just need someone that's genuine and compassionate and that cares for them. You know, it's hard to see that linear progress all the time because again, kids are kids, teens are teens, adults are adults, we're all people and we all make mistakes and we're not always gonna see, okay, progression, progression, progression. And you might notice that the best work actually happens when I just sit and listen and build rapport with my clients and let them know that I'm there for them regardless. I might have a week with one client where it doesn't seem like we did a lot of work, right? But in reality, that kind of opened up to me about feelings that they've had from being bullied at school. And they feel a little bit just more comfortable coming in and talking to me because the work will always come. You know, it's the relationship that's most important. So if I could go back, I would really honed in on that and just focus more on just holding that even deeper going forward.

SPEAKER_00 9:35

Absolutely. And you know, they teach us that in class, right? They always say sometimes it's just so meaningful to sit and be with your client because they might not have a lot of people in their lives that do that for them. Just sit and give them undivided attention for them to just be. And so we learn a lot about interventions and different ways that we can help. And so we're all about coming out the gate and I'm gonna structure this and I'm gonna do XYZ, which is important. But what I hear you saying is that you go at their pace. So if they need an intervention, they need something to learn and practice that week, that's what you can provide. If they just need you to sit with them, then you can provide that as well. So it sounds like you're kind of learning to go at the client's pace. You're learning that sitting and being with them a lot of times is enough for them. That's important for them. We are here for our clients, for what they may need. And so that's great. We learned so much. And believe me, I've been doing this for 16 years now. I still am learning and growing. I'm learning and growing from the clients that I'm seeing. I'm learning and growing from all of you. And so one of my encouragements is always just to stay open to that, you know, to not just feel like you reach the mountaintop, but just be open to learning and growing. And it can be such an amazing and fruitful career ahead of you. And I know that you do have a great career ahead of you. And so because you already have a share of experience wrapped up, and I want you to brag on yourself a little bit, but what would you say that clients often appreciate or give feedback on about working with you? What are some things that you have found as far as feedback with working with Miss Lexi?

SPEAKER_01 11:13

I think the biggest thing, and again, not to toot my own horn, but I think it's really just that I genuinely care. You know, I have built relationships that I could see myself, you know, 10 years down the line being like, I wonder how this kiddo's doing, you know, and still having that same care for them that I do today and this for the family in general. We talked about it earlier, but that very like wraparound incorporating the entire system, I think is just so important. And I show that to all of my clients. Hey, you could really benefit from these accommodations. Let's figure out how we can get you an evaluation scheduled. Let me talk to your teacher, let me talk to your counselor at school. How can I help you most? Let's find a group that you can get in. It might not even be here with us, but maybe it's at another practice. I try to develop genuine relationships with my clients and with those families and show them that I do care. And that way when I do have to be a little bit more tough and I have to kind of give them more of that, okay, this is what is going on. This is what maybe we can improve on, it's easier to hear. And then they actually respect that when it comes from me because they know that it's coming from a good place. So I'll tell you right now, I know every single one of my clients by name, I know their birthdays, I know everything about them. And I strive to do that because it's important to me and they're trusting me with things in their life that they might not tell other people, like we talked about as well. So if I'm not showing that genuine care for them, then how effective can I truly be?

SPEAKER_00 12:36

So absolutely. And you made a really good point in that in the therapeutic relationship and in our outside of therapy relationships, they're built on trust. And so we do value that here, you know. And so once they can trust that you do care for them and that you are here for them, that's when they really will open up and also be open to the feedback that you're talking about. Because sometimes we have to give a little bit of a difficult, you know, feedback. We might have those moments with clients just because we truly want the change process to happen. And change isn't always easy. Change can often be really hard. And so being able to be honest and direct and letting them know some things, that's going to be built on the trusting and working relationship that we have and a value. This is why you're placed in great space here, because one of our values is client care and making sure the client is taken care of from the time that they walk in the door, from the time they leave our office is we want them to truly and genuinely know that we care for them here and that they're in a safe place. And so I love that you bring that personal touch in with your clients. And really, you know, something that we say often too is it's the perception of care. It's not always that we do care, it's the perception that we care for them that matters so much. And so the fact that your clients are walking away knowing that you care, you've definitely done it. You know, you've done a great job there. And we often get really positive feedback about the sexy as well. It's her positive attitude, how genuine she is. She asks questions, she collaborates extremely well, probably coming from your experience in the past as well. So I just can't say enough good things. I'm so happy you're part of our team. And so, how do you get through the day, though? There's been days where I've seen your schedule. You might have six or seven clients in a row. I know I'm a coffee drinker, so I do my best to limit it to two, maybe three cups a day. But what gets you through the workday?

SPEAKER_01 14:29

Well, honestly, I don't think I mentioned it, but you know, I have two young kiddos at home and I have an amazing husband. And when I'm having a stressful day, first off, I have to think, okay, it could always be worse. You know, I really try to put myself in that position of, okay, I'm doing the work, I'm helping others. So it really can't be too bad. You know, if I have to go through a long day, then I just push through because I know it's gonna be impactful for somebody else. But if I do get that little break in between, I always, always try to give my husband a call. I have a one-year-old and a two-year-old. So just seeing them kind of gives me that, hey, clean slate, I'm back at it. And now I can be affected for everybody else because I know that if I'm not strong as a person, then I'm not gonna be strong enough for my clients. So it wouldn't be fair to them. So I have to use that as like a little reset. And it truly, that's the most helpful thing for sure.

SPEAKER_00 15:18

That's fantastic. And I've met your beautiful family, they are adorable, and you just you can tell how much they love you as soon as they come in the door, running to mom. They absolutely love and adore you. Your husband takes care of you. I just, I'm really happy that you have such an amazing family to go home to. And how do you decompress us getting through the workday? But sometimes we do have these days where we're really caring so much. We're doing a lot of output. So, how do you decompress after a full day of sessions?

SPEAKER_01 15:47

Well, I'm a true crime junkie. So, yes, I watch a lot of documentaries on true crime. Honestly, I have a full list of things I'm supposed to be watching this week because that's what I love. And I love podcasts, so I do that a lot. But truly, honestly, I'll come home and again, seeing my kiddos, we watch a family movie together. I put them to bed, I watch a documentary, I listen to a podcast, and just spending quality time with the people that I love, I think is so important. You know, we harp on self-care for our clients and for our families. And it's often, you know, why compassion fatigue is so big in our field is because we don't do it for ourselves. So I make sure that I'm, you know, doing things with my kids frequently. I go and, you know, if there's a holiday, I make sure that I'm spending quality time with my family, spending quality time, you know, with the people that I care about in my life. So that I do get that rest again so I can come back and be better and be just as effective as I was before. But I love being outdoors. I love nature. I'm a kayaker. I love being out. I used to be on a on a professional water ski team. I know I can I was on a professional water skiing team. I love the water. Growing up, I thought I was going to be a dolphin trainer and that ship sailed off because I was realized I was afraid of dolphins for some reason. I just love being out in nature, being able to decompress and get that just refreshed. I think we're truly ourselves when we're out alone in the peace and quiet and with no technology, no social media or anything like that. So absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 17:23

I think it's so important too, obviously. And therapists sometimes can be the worst of this. Like we need to practice what we preach. It's okay for us to need help sometimes. It's okay for us to rest, even just within our own office to encourage each other. Hey, what are you doing this weekend? Are you gonna get some rest? Are you sure you're taking care of yourself? So I often hear those conversations happening because we do truly also care for each other, which is something that makes you really proud to have such an amazing team that truly enjoys working together and coming to work. I hope. I mean, this is my hopefully that's reality as well. But I just want to close by saying, I'm so grateful you're a part of the team again. One of the reasons I wanted to do this was to highlight each one of you because you're so unique and different in your specialties and who you are as a person, which is also what you're bringing to therapy into the room. And I'm proud to have you as part of our team. I'm glad that you chose what to have your training experience with. And I hope that we have many more years to come. I mean, I've enjoyed working with you so much, and it would just be a joy to kind of see you continue on in this journey here. So thank you so much. Yeah, thank you for being a part of it. I don't know if you have any last words or anything else that you want to share, but I appreciate your time taking it out in your busy schedule today to meet with me so that we could highlight Miss Lexi today.

SPEAKER_01 18:42

I appreciate it, Dr. Cray.

SPEAKER_00 18:45

Great. Well, thank you so much. Thank you for sharing a bit of who you are and your heart for what you bring to the work you do here. Now, if you are listening and you feel connected to today's conversation, Miss Lexi may be a great fit for you and your family. If you need help, if you need support, if your kiddo needs help, please give us a call and specifically recommend Miss Lexi. You can learn more about Miss Lexi and our team through FindingHelponasCenter.com. And if you enjoyed this episode, feel free to like, share, pass it along. It helps us highlight incredible therapists who are doing amazing work here. Thank you for listening, and I'll see you next time. Thanks, Miss Lexi. Thank you. Bye. Bye.