Dark Psychology Won’t Get You Laid (But This Will)

Forget what the alpha grifters told you—dark psychology isn’t a dating cheat code. It’s a trauma loop dressed in cold empathy, sold by charlatans with mommy issues. In this inaugural episode of Narcissism Nation, Enrique breaks down the manosphere’s manipulation myths and exposes what dark psychology really is: a symptom of emotional immaturity, dissociation, and unresolved abandonment wounds.

Using real psychodynamic theory from McWilliams, Fonagy, and Kernberg, Enrique shows how dating success has nothing to do with coercion—and everything to do with self-regulation, presence, and psychological integrity. This isn’t a script. This is the truth. And if you’re ready to become the man women actually want to surrender to, PrecisionCycle is your next move. elevate.epo

Transcript

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Hello, and welcome to another episode of Narcissism Nation. My name is Enrique Elevate dot epo. Let's open it up. Today I wanted to talk about dark psychology and how it isn't the cheat code to dating. a lot of people online and on YouTube, on the manosphere have liked to say it is, but rather it's a trauma loop that men are engaged in Just lying to themselves about how they can hack the system in some way to obtain more dates if they fall into these toxic elements of masculinity. We see how dark psychology comes to be, a source of people trying to give advice and relationships for men to gain control and exploit vulnerabilities in people achieve dominance in that way. But really what you're doing in that sense is Overtly playing a part that may not be native to you. And that might be a stretch for some guys, because a lot of guys aren't about that action. they're not necessarily the type of people who are going to be engaged in a way that, they would come across as credible when it comes to their psychology prowess, At its core, their teachings are pedaling the idea that dark psychology can move mountains when it comes to getting dates and really establish yourself as a masculine presence. But in reality, what that does is it's just creating more confusion and just mirroring back trauma. So what exactly is dark psychology? It's based on, the dark triad, Which is narcissism, machiavellianism, and psychopathy. there are people who are true psychopaths and true narcissists who want to just instill their vileness and. And just disgustingness onto people and abuse as much as they can. That's unfortunate. But we live in a world where yes, evil does exist. And evil doers are out there. How we define evil doers, that seems to always be changing because we seem to define it by who seems to want to hurt the most people and gain as much benefit from that, whether that's views, cliques, money, whatever. We tend to value the bully and not necessarily the victim. And we've talked length this week about. People being victims ultimately to incompetent bullies and to people who project overtly dark masculinity, which comes off hollow and doesn't bring any. substance to the table, but just this persona, this character gets your, this caricature that's created and then they become a meme, and then they get mocked by guys like Charlie on online, or a TOI or one of these other guys who love to do alpha male takedowns, which itself lives on a realm of narcissism. Hey, this podcast lives on the realm of narcissism because we're all trying to get something From a consumer, from someone who's viewing us and saying, yeah, I align with that. Let me see what this person has to offer, what I have to offer is precision cycle. Which is the antithesis of dark psychology, So at its core, what are we talking about? We're talking about gaslighting, narcissism, machiavellianism and psychopathy. The dark triad, as we've defined before behavioral conditioning through love bombing bread, crumbing, nagging, right? frame control, mirroring and covert influence. That's really at its core. Dark psych is, and cold empathy at the end of the day understanding emotions without really presenting too much of our own compassion into it. A lot of the prominent figures that you'll see online, discussing these topics, you have Andrew Tate, who's probably at the apex of the dark psych male grifter, complex, and I use that term not as a term of. the case model is that he is here to sell his products and a lot of those products end up hurting people because he ends up taking money. I'm not saying that's coffee zilla, and it's all these other people who have validated that in real time how he tries to rug pull audience. Andrew Tate, right? he uses a lot of these dark element psychologies frame control status manipulation and emotional dominance in dating and business Rhetoric, he packages that as alpha male discipline. but it's often just coercive psychology, repackaged narcissism heavy on disdain for emotional vulnerability, fuels dominant space dynamics. And that's the, at its core, someone that sort of illustrates that cold empathy, he goes around calling men, vile names to demean them when they show emotion. making it seem as if it's not valid for men to show emotion in a strength based situation. the reality is that being able to express your emotions as a man is the telltale sign of someone fully integrated and thus probably more masculinely attuned than someone who represses that. Aspect, if you're angio Tate, and need someone to talk to, precision Cycle is here to help you you also, have Robert Green who writes about it for more of a defensive position, but again, some people extract negative. components and try to reverse engineer ways to, validate their own narcissistic abuse Richard Gran, the Spartan Life coach, talks openly about narcissistic abuse, the dark triad personalities and how to defend against that. Again, you pick up the language of the psychic warfare here. A lot of people do, and they can reverse engineer that. then there's Hamza Achmed who goes all in with the dark psychology buzzwords, to sell masculinity programs. you know how to manipulate, her emotions, right? Something that he'll say a lot. frame her before she frames you Feminine, nature exposed. a lot of these take downs of, supposed femininity and femininity, movement. Oftentimes, again, a lot of projection here. And that's really what we should get to Dark psychology is a projection not only for clickbait and try to get traffic, but it is a projections of someone's own shame and narcissism, which lives inside of them. If we look at someone like Andrew Tate, It's performance to compensate for trauma and the masculinity model rooted in early emotional humiliation. That's really what Andrew Tate comes across to someone who's a trained clinician. a lot of abandonment, anxiety, a lot of maternal emotional neglect. This is pretty evident In his presentation We can go back to the original father wound. He had emotional inconsistencies and abandonment issues with his dad. His dad was a brilliant chess player, but reportedly very unstable. He was domineering and absent oftentimes. Andrew idolizes him, calls him a genius, but also describes growing up broke and overlooked and having to raise himself which speaks to a lot of father abandonment. And so he creates this paradox within him, where he talks about worshiping his father, while his father let him starve, right? So there's this duality, this split that happens with Andrew. And this breeds this hyper masculine compensation that occurs you see very prominently in his presentation. This is why he obsesses with dominance, control and hierarchy. This is because he was born in a world where no one protected him, especially his father, and he was abandoned. when he says emotion is weakness, that's a telltale sign from a clinical standpoint that there is a very deep mother wound there. he rarely talks about his mom. In detail, but he's , dismissive and emotionally distant So there's no actual mirroring that ever occurred there from a lacanian standpoint. his mother never really mirrored that aspect to him. Thus, his core belief are that women are emotional, feelings are for the weak and suggests a deep mistrust for feminine care. That's why he goes around calling people the P word, putting them down pejoratives, that always are feminine based. This is very. Real mommy issues here, that are on display and all you're seeing is that projection from someone that is highly unintegrated in that perspective, he felt abandoned by his mom that's pretty front and center, and that's why you see a lot of the emotional coldness as an armor when he delivers that. And then he, talks about he was being bullied and how he had to grow up defending himself. This all reeks of. Narcissistic ego wounds that are now being projected because he's been able to put himself in a situation where he has transcended that made money built a career doing kickboxing and this is now the toxic outcome of someone who hasn't really had any real integration. It hasn't really processed any of these traumatic experiences. Andrew, if you're out there and you're hearing my voice. DM Precision Cycle TV or enrique elevate epo.com. I will sit down with you 15 minutes and we will take that seven point dimensional assessment and pinpoint where we need to focus I got you covered. First one's free, it's on me, as we move past that and get to, the benefits of dark psychology, we see how a lot of it is based on defining male. Personality of defining male worth in the society, and I don't wanna make this about Andrew Tate or anyone on that side because it's not about them. What it is about is people's misunderstanding of what exactly the dark triad is and what the purpose of that mechanism is within ourselves. The understanding that we want to. Knowingly engage in trauma loops and wholeheartedly want to consent to our own narcissism being on display, is a gateway to a lot of unseen. sociopathy if we wanna say it that way, because the reality is that what we're doing is excusing all the worst parts of ourselves by projecting that out into the world and making it seem as if other people are made to bear the brunt Our shortcomings, which is not necessarily true. it's not my fault, for instance, that your dad, Andrew, was not around, right? to call me a disparaging name is inappropriate because the reality is you're angry at your dad, you're not angry at me, you're not angry at anyone else. You're not angry at me. you're angry at, the fact that this man who you've revere was never around and he may be a lie in your head not necessarily the person you think he is, Further than that, when these people try to sell you on the fact that you can get dates, that you can learn the hacks to be more productive in the dating arena and find people to exploit for intimacy or whatever. What's really happening here is that you're being gaslit and you're being promoted to engage all the worst parts of yourself. And the reality is that we don't need to ever get to a point where we have to invoke these very dark places in ourselves. because that's just gonna open a door for you to experience your own trauma and your own wounds and have to, find ways to project that onto other people. Manipulation doesn't make women love you and makes them fear you or need you, and that's not a recipe for a good relationship, If your partner doesn't. Trust you or is ultra clingy because she sees that you're the only one in her life that can help her and save her. that's not love. That's not the same thing as someone wholeheartedly wanting to be a partner, bringing a hundred percent of themselves and you bringing a hundred percent of yourself to get together and become this new relationship. Rather, you're becoming this relationship mixed with the toxicity already baked into the cake. And so then you want to Go around complain about the fact that now you're in this toxic relationship. That's probably not the way to go either. the thing about dark psychology is it lives in this world of pop psychology that's online. People who aren't psychologists, people that have never practiced clinically trying to utilize very important and serious clinical positions and concepts to hack some kind of a dating scene. that's not necessarily appropriate. but the thing that we wanna move to for this purposes of this, presentation is that you don't need to seduce her that way. because when you do that, you're just mirroring her own trauma back to her. And when you do that, you're creating trauma loops and trauma bonds that once you've worked through the trauma and that bond gets. Severed, at some point you're gonna see that it's a hollow relationship and there's nothing that actually anchors it into any type of reality. that's not a relationship you want to be in. Believe me, I've been there, I've done that. I understand those relationships because I see 'em from a client perspective. I've experienced them myself. And when you theorize and look at the literature, you understand that these relationships are actually more detrimental to your health. Loneliness is not as bad as being in a relationship where you feel trapped or unable to fully be your authentic self. If you need tricks to attract women, you've already lost because you're not necessarily even in the room and you're not in the conversation. My hope today is to break down dark psychology, but from the perspective of a clinician that's worked with borderline personality, disordered females extensively and has seen it on a daily basis, we get to a place where we're no longer searching to see how we can hack dark psychology components to get her to love us, but rather how can we become better versions of ourselves so that we don't have to rely on those tricks? Because here's the reality. I've been more successful in my own personal life by just being myself, being present and being empathetic A safe haven for people to come feel comfortable around. I've been sitting at my desk doing my work and have been, offered to be taken to lunch by women and other people who just wanna have the energy that I bring to the relationship That speaks to my ability to be relational and to understand that. From an empathetic point of view, it's much more beneficial to engage in a relationship wholeheartedly as yourself, as your authentic being, rather than trying to come off as a caricature. So we've talked a little bit about what dark psychology is. the pop definition of it. It's tactics used by narcissist, sociopaths, and machiavellians to manipulate others. Okay. The real definition though is primitive psychological defenses rooted in fear, abandonment, and shame. That's from A-A-D-S-M perspective. If we wanna trickle that down through psychodynamic theory, we can look out Nancy McWilliams. I'm gonna look at, Peter Fonagy, and Otto Kernberg. Those dark psychology, stances are rooted in primitive psychological defenses. if you want to, know what primitive psychological defenses are, I encourage you to go back in some of the videos that I've done, I've laid them out. In the past, how our brains and minds will utilize primitive psychological defenses like splitting, like ideal idealization projective identification to protect against ego wounds, right? And then advance into more, advanced, psychological defenses to mask narcissism, and explain away some of that narcissistic behavior. These are things that our brain do because they don't want to feel cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance literally hurts the brain. It hurts to have these two opposing thoughts in your brain balance out at times when you have very deeply held reliefs. And when that happens, your brain wants to disassociate itself from the pain that it's experiencing of having to balance out these two concepts and the work that it's doing. this happens with people who are very unintegrated, people who have not dealt with whatever childhood trauma they may be dealing with or whatever other type of event is causing them some kind of unregulated stress or anxiety. And this will go back to that tennis court match, to that tennis court. Metaphor that I used, in one of my previous videos to engage their narcissism when depression has really activated their own shame. The way it works is your shame is activated. You get depressed to protect against that depressive ego wound. You engage your primitive defenses or your advanced defenses which is your narcissism to gain the upper hand, right? and the reality is that these dark triads, it's not about dominance. it's about dysregulation at the end of the day, right? You're not playing 40 chess like Andrew Tate or some of these other people on the manosphere would like to have you believe. You're just dissociating better than she is in that moment. the gaslighting isn't genius. That's not something you should take pride in. The fact that you can craft these statements that have this gaslighting component built into the cake, right? Because it's what borderline people do. It's what people in those positions who can't hold two truths in their head. That's the way that they operate. So you're not coming off like some kind of a grand scheming Machiavellian type. You're coming off like someone with a borderline personality disorder. And what does borderline personality disorder ultimately really say about someone? It says you're really emotionally immature. That's what a borderline personality disorder is. Someone who's stuck in the past, repressed in the past sort of processes like a child. Adolescent and not an adult who is able to balance out multiple truths and have, the respect for differing opinions. When you see the world in black and white, that's a very borderline position, literally, and that's by definition what you're doing. You're only seeing from on or off. You're only seeing it from yes or no. you're with us or against us, and you're not seeing the other angles the world is not binary, but rather it's a spectrum. There's a lot of different features and a lot of different sort of ways of looking at a topic, cutting it down to just two different ways. That's pretty primitive and childlike. And that's what you're really saying when you're saying, I engage in active gaslighting it. You're saying, I'm engaging in childish behavior. Love bombing is what happens when you think affection will stop someone from leaving. It's not gonna stop someone from leaving. If anything, love bombing is gonna make them wanna leave faster because they're seeing how truly uncalibrated you are and unstable at the end of the day. So let's look at what some of these prominent figures would say, right? Nancy McWilliams great. psychotherapist, someone who's written a lot about. the humanistic perspective of psychodynamic and how to hold healing spaces, She would say that dark psychology is a symptom of unresolved attachment trauma and fragile ego structure, right? It's not strategy, it's suffering wearing armor, and that's probably the best way to look at it. When somebody comes across like an Andrew Tate, like one of these other people online. Who are some of these alpha influencers you should just automatically jump to. There's a lot of unresolved attachment trauma there. mommy issues, daddy issues, all kinds of other relational issues are at their core These are very fragile, weak people. These are people who will resort to violence, the ultimate form of expressing that you're a child and can't really think, the grownups and don't deserve to be amongst the grownups. because if that's your first line of defense when it comes to ego protection, then you've already lost Violence will always remove you from any credibility. outside of professional boxers or MMA fighters who do that for a living, going around looking like a tough guy and being a guy that always fights, you're, what kind of a life is that? You're rather isolated. You're gonna probably end up in jail. You're gonna probably end up dead at some point because there's not any sort of positive outcome that comes from you picking fights with people you're aware of that as armor because it's the only thing you have.. Other than any ability to actually reason and hold yourself in any sort of high respect. It has to be done with this power display. just as the world tells us, there's always a bigger fish out there, and you're not gonna always be the biggest dude in the room. That's the reality of it. when we trickle it down from that McWilliams perspective, we're seeing that most guys use dark psychology to avoid being humiliated and to hide the fragile ego that they have inside. This is why emotionally unwell men use manipulation, right? they avoid rejection. To hide their own shame. They'd rather burn that bridge before they even get to it, than have to sit through the pain and the emotions that would come once someone decides to leave them and hurt them. Because they've been hurt too many times in the past and now that hurt is literally an existential threat to them. And that's why they engage this narcissism. It's why emotionally unwell women, are attracted to it. Because this is reenactment of early abandonment themselves, right? women who are codependent and are attracted to this type of component, they're just locked in this unconscious reenactment loop where they're trying to generate the feeling that their own father abandoning them. Let them have, because once they're able to generate that feeling, they are able then to justify all their behavior and it's one of these unconscious mechanism that occurs, so that they can feel as if they have the power to act the way that they want to act. To express themselves in a histrionic way to express themselves in a narcissistic, gaslighting, love bombing type of way, and then find ways to sever that bridge. before they get hurt. This is why online dating is so difficult, right? This is why so many people ghost the ghosting occurs as a mechanism to burn that communication bridge before they sense that abandonment is gonna happen. So rather than let that abandonment happen, which might not even happen, because it might just be based on perception, which is false because a lot of times these people live with false realities. Rather than sit there and experience that, they'd rather just cut the bridge out and blow it up so that they don't have to deal with any of it. Thus, the blocking, thus the ghosting. people who do that, they're not being strong. they're not practicing as some kind of a boundary. They're showing you that they are some of the weakest emotional people in the world because they're unable to. Deal with any type of conflict. So they'd rather just ghost, right? You shouldn't ever sit there and pine over some woman who ghosted you. It's probably the best thing that can happen because those people are so broken that the reality is you don't wanna be around them, As good as the intimacy may be, those people don't have any real substantive value that they can provide to your life, and that's the way that you should interpret being ghosted in a relationship, Those people didn't have the ability to actually hold you in their frame, and this is why they decided to cut you loose. when we engage in this, dark psychology behavior, thinking that this is what women want. That's not what women want. I've worked with women borderline personality, women, I've studied women extensively in my time I know exactly what they're looking for. whether consciously or unconsciously, it's stuff that I've picked up on, right? She doesn't wanna pick up artists. She wants a well-regulated man. That's what all these people are ultimately looking for, is someone who can be that masculine figure in their space that can ground them to reality. You're not a Sigma male. Let's just throw that out there. You're just scared to show her who you really are. And that's really indicative of one of the lowest forms of masculinity is your inability to actually be open and authentic The reality is that manipulative men attract dysregulated women. That's the core theme here that's not power. That's just matching pathologies. You're just finding people who are just as broken as you are when you engage these narcissistic entities. you're never gonna have any type of true love component there. You're just gonna have this constant battle with someone who is just as broken as you are, and you're gonna ask these questions. Why does this keep happening? Why do they always act that way? Sit there and answer that question, and you're gonna get to the fact because you let it happen, because you stay committed to that dynamic, because you cannot walk away and you're not mad enough and you're not woman enough, or you're not strong enough to walk away and just let one people who are broken be broken and work on yourself. If we move to what Peter Fonagy right says another psychodynamic, theorist. He would say that these behaviors represent a collapse in mentalizing capacity, for him, mentalization is the ability to hold multiple truths and realities in one space, be able to process that, respect them, and make a well-educated, calculated decision to move forward, knowing that there's a bunch of different perspectives in the world, right? The world doesn't exist as black and white. It exists as a rainbow of different options. recognizing that those options are available, that is something Fonagy says is very important for mentalizing, right? Being able to hold multiple truths and realities in your head. The individual cannot hold other minds, right? They see them only as objects for threats. So you're not with me, you're against me. That's narcissism 1 0 1. Healthy dating then requires restoring epistemic trust. And what that means is a two-way street. A, healthy dating means that I have able to trust you and you are able to trust me, and you are able to hold a lot of my frustrations and multiple truths while at the same time I am able to hold a lot of your multiple truths. And we are able to balance that out and make decisions together as a partnership. That's what Fonagy would say being able to hold people as human beings and not see them as objects. That's probably the first step in realizing you're not a narcissist and not exercising your narcissistic positions. here's a real reason it doesn't work, right? You're not seducing a woman when you're using dark psychology. You're reenacting your own mother wound. This is true. every woman who is seeing this right now, and every man watching this right now should come to the conclusion that when you engage in these manipulative tactics, you're just reenacting unconsciously your own mommy issues, you're using manipulation. Or game, from a position of fear of being seen truly and as a whole human being, you're afraid that a woman or a man is gonna look at you and see all your brokenness, To hurt you in your life and have made you who you are, right? The traumas, the abandonment, all the other things in the world that have left you with that shame component. That then gives you your depressive days and makes you act manically different, afterwards. Women who have done healing work, see right through that, right? That's why you'll go out and you'll see someone, you'll date someone that's done their own sort of introspective journey and they've processed their own emotion and they recognize a child when they see one at that point, because a good, psychologist and definitely someone like me will usually help someone look at the system that they're in, take them outta that system so they can see then how. Broken and damaged and ugly, that system is, and they'll be able to adapt some kind of change component to fix it. And when people are on their journey to do that you're the proverbial asshole and your girlfriend goes to therapy or vice versa, The person who goes to therapy, they're gonna start to see yeah, this person's seriously broken. I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. That's ultimately what. People who do their own healing. See, and people that are uncalibrated and still practicing these dark tactics, but see, here's the thing. For the men out there listening the women you want in your life, the women you want to attract have magnetized to your presence. She's watching how you breathe. She's not noticing what you say. she's noticing the way you carry yourself. She's noticing the way you present yourself and how your presence Calibrates and adapts to the room. If you're the guy who walks into a room and immediately starts to spout off nonsense and just fills dead space with your own voice, that is a dead giveaway for someone who has completely uncalibrated, who is stuck in a narcissistic loop and really isn't worth dating because they're still children There they're people that don't have any real emotional quotient. that illustrates any type of real masculine maturity. you're a child, basically Is what that is. the person who is able to enter a room, be confident in themselves and how they present themselves without even having to say a word. That's who she wants. She doesn't want the loud mouth. Who can? kick game, and speaks like butter, She wants the guy who is able to just be the presence in the room who's about that action, right? The guy who's quiet and able to contain themselves and really create the safety component that Maslow. And his hierarchy of needs has always said is important. It's the second most important thing on that list because safety is one of those things that bring us to all the other wellness components that we want to generate and illustrate. So the reality is that you're not an alpha, you're just the latest version of her stepdad that she's fallen in love with and is enacting. And once she's achieved that goal of what that enactment is going to. Burn you or ghost you or whatever they do, that's really what's happening here. You shouldn't be surprised when that happens, and you shouldn't be going online and talking about how horrible women are. you just invited someone and were essentially the canvas for them to play out all their daddy issues in real time. once they've gotten past that, they understand that they can go find someone else to do that. if they're not blowing up your phone, take it as a blessing because the reality is they found some other sucker that they're gonna now utilize to get that daddy component and then end up blowing through him just as quick, You avoiding eye contact with your own shame. that's really what it is. it's you seeing that people are looking at you and trying to cover your face with the words and all this toxic nonsense that comes outta your mouth because you're unable to really face the fact that people can probably see right through you and see all your pain trauma. This is why guys like. Andrew Tate to go back to them. Wes Watson, if we wanna bring him up. That's why they can't shut up. they always have to keep talking because if they do, people will see right through them like a lot of people on YouTube have. And see that they're nothing more than just broken. shells of people who have to refl, you know this, their last thing that they can project to the world is this false sense of masculinity, which ultimately leads to death. Jail or any other types of bad outcomes, there's a reason why these guys end up getting thrown back in jail because they can't help themselves. at the end of the day, this is the last thing they have. they don't have anything else to offer this world other than violence, what's the marketplace for that. It's not in our thriving society, that's for sure. And the reality is that the most powerful man in the room is the one who doesn't need to perform. He's the one who just sits there, writes notes, and gets text messages on his phone we can just be the best versions of ourselves. Empathetic, grounded. And we will naturally attract the people who are looking for that energy. it's truly, not that hard. And if you really want tips and tricks on how to attract women, just being yourself, precision Cycle is here for you. Our aero system is here to help you become a better, calibrated man so that you do become that person that just gets the text outta nowhere from women who just wanna have you come over spend a good time with them. Moving on to Otto Kernberg, He would say that dark psychology reflects borderline or narcissistic personality organization, These behaviors are primitive defenses splitting idealization, projective identification, used to manage unbearable affect. Real intimacy is not possible from this ego structure. And we'd look at, again, primitive defense is splitting. That's either, you're looking at the good mom, you're looking at the bad mom. That's that ego split that happens and we start to become binary, idealization, right? We, this is the person that we absolutely, the best person in the world, and then extreme devaluation when we decide that we no longer want them, they're the worst person in the world. And then projective identification, right? it's how I project my shame onto you and make you wear that shame. that's the hallmarks of dark psychology, and that is the hallmarks of being a narcissistic personality organization, And the thing that we need to understand from that perspective is that presence is the new game here. Okay? You want a split game that's eighties, nineties nonsense. Pick up artistry that doesn't exist anymore. If you wanna be in this game as a new masculine figure, your presence is your calling card, Not the words that are coming outta your mouth. Self-regulation is a new status symbol. Women don't want guys who are allowed and nervous and anxious. They want guys who are self-regulated, centered, and present ready to take on all of life's challenges. Structure is what equals safety not. Violence, not muscles, not, all these other things in the world that we think are fleeting that we think are important. Those things are fleeting, right? Muscles are important. Yes, absolutely. For longevity and heart health and brain health and all those things. And that's why if you go to the gym, keep going to the gym, keep building those muscles, But don't fall back on that being your only calling card and being your only worth, because the reality is that self calibration being structured. Being self calibrated, being structured is the thing that is the new calling card for strong masculine types. Listening, containment and clarity that's attractive. Women want someone that listens to them, that understands what's coming out of their mouth, that can hear them, that can really understand their plight and identify with a lot of the pain that they're going through. They want someone who can sit there and contain their anxiety. Without bleeding their own anxiety into the space and making it weird, They want someone that can hold all of this structure so that when they do have these breakdowns, they can hold them and really be a safe space for them. Safe space shouldn't be some trope that we throw around to demean people. You'd be surprised how easy it is to catch a date by just asking someone and letting them know that if they ever need space to process, you're there for them. That's extremely attractive to someone. Really try it sometime. Hey, if you ever just want space to be held and not be judged, I'm here for you. Try that. Just be out here to listen to, right? And you'll see how far that goes. And clarity. When people come to you in their frantic state, when they're all disorganized and uncontained, and you're able to provide clarity without being the dad, without being the person who figures it out for them, but rather holds that space that allows them the opportunity to process and come to their own conclusion, that is extremely attractive to a woman. And that is something that every woman will always gravitate to because rather than the guy who's over here trying to boast about how much this, that the other they have, the woman would rather sit down with the guy who can actually listen to their issue and help them help themselves and help them come to their own conclusions and. actualizations so that they can then move forward with their own life in a positive way. what I've learned working in the mental health industry is that I don't need to manipulate women because I can hold them. Emotionally, right? Women want to be around me because I'm not gonna judge them and I'm not gonna figure it out for them. I am going to sit there and let them process and then offer back to them a mirror of what is occurring so that we can find ways to reframe, And when we do that, women feel heard, but they're also empowered. And when you can do that is extremely attractive. Believe me, I know firsthand. If you wanna be the most attractive man in the room, right? You need to breathe slower and You need to be the coolest operator in the room because that will be noticed. And the reality you want true game, true pickup, artistry stuff. If you can name what she feels before she does You'll never need another pickup line in your life. If you're able to give words to her pain, her anxiety, to whatever she is coming to you with, she will forever see that as you being that person that is able to provide that function for them. And that is something that goes beyond, any type of thing you could see online or any trope that you might see out there from men trying to pick up women, Because that's not what women want. That is fleeting. That is in the moment. that is very temporary when you become a person they can consistently come to and really feel and be heard. You'll see that is the one thing that will make you stand out beyond anyone else. if we look back at Nancy McWilliams, she writes that the capacity to hold ambivalence, Tolerate discomfort and respond rather than react is the hallmark of psychological maturity and therefore relational magnetism. that's something prevalent in the literature. Something that. Clinicians have seen just in their own work and studying how relationships operate. That's something that I would agree with from my own work and my own sort of, personal operations. When you are that person with the most psychological maturity, you don't have to revert to dark psychology. You can just be yourself and that will attract the people you want to attract. There's a fine line between mastery and manipulation, right? It's called integrity that's really the most important aspect here. If we're gonna name it, we'll name it. Positive psychology, right? Integrity. That's the thing that men should really strive for, not the worst elements of narcissism and borderline personality disorders, you can use your awareness of trauma and defense mechanisms to create safety, not leverage them for vulnerability, right? Not to create sort of aspects where we're taking advantage of people who are in Fragile states But rather we can use that knowledge to create the safe space that people need to have conversations with us. And then rather than us taking advantage of that, we recognize and hold it. And then let that itself become the kindling for whatever relationship is going to occur. dark psychology takes precision presence. It offers, right? It, it gives people OnRamps to your personality. It gives people on ramps to a relationship as opposed to dark psychology, which just looks to take something from someone else and create power dynamics that aren't helpful. In six months and a year and two years down the line in this relationship right. And we have to understand that mastery isn't about taking, Mastery is about attunement. It's about being attuned to your partner. the opposite sex. our environment, our job, That's what mastery is, Mastery isn't being the loudest room. It's about who's the most attuned person, embodiment. Is better than tactics. Truth is better than performance, and nobody wants to be around someone that is obviously fake, trying to play a part. They want to be in the room with someone who embodies masculinity, who embodies self integrion, who embodies their own self, and doesn't have to resort to primitive tactics to be noticed. So if she opens up, it's not because you tricked her. if you're the most calibrated person, And able to hold the space, if she opens up, It's because she felt you in a way that doesn't make her afraid. that is the first sign that someone is into you with the fact when they cannot be afraid around you, there's no power dynamic there. And they can just be themselves. That is true attraction. Because at the end of the day, she doesn't want a puppet master. She doesn't want another dad, She wants a lighthouse. someone she can look to as that beacon, that source of strength for them that they can keep coming to for regulation. And again, we don't wanna get into a world where we're starting to be, dependent. And have people dependent on us. But when they see us as a positive light in their world, they will attract themselves to us regardless. They don't want someone that's gonna pull strings because the person that does want you to pull strings, they're just reenacting those trauma loops, those daddy issues. And that should tell you that might not be a good situation for you. The intimacy might be great, but the emotional fallout from that is devastating. And believe me, I know how that looks. I know how some of the strongest men I've come across who you would think are some of the most well calibrated people, ultimately break. They break really hard and a lot, and it's difficult for them to really get back to who they were. several months worth of work. intensive work maybe to get back, but you ultimately never lose that part of yourself. That was taken advantage of in that situation. So in closing here, you don't need manipulation. You don't need dark psychology to get women, right? You need psychological integrity, the kind that holds chaos without feeding into it that listens without trying to fix problems, that knows the difference between seduction and domination. And that's the key point here, That's what we offer at Precision Cycle. That's what Precision Cycle teaches you, right? Not game, not scripts, power. We show you structure. We show you the truth so that you can embody all three of those aspects and be the most attractive magnet in the world for people looking for lighthouses. That's the kind of person that a woman wants to give herself to wholeheartedly and be fully present in that relationship, which is probably the type of relationship you really want. If you ask yourself and you're truthful do you want someone that is gonna just allow you to have passive. Or do you want to have a relationship with someone that's really into you and really sees you as a true partner, someone that is going to, really look for you rather than look at you as that child that they have to manage? precision cycle helps you become the magnet that they are more than happy and eager to run to and be with that lighthouse. So if you want to know more and you want my help and you want to get more dates and you wanna know how I've done it, how my clients have done it, how literally just sitting there doing our work, being ourselves can generate interest in people and have them text you i'll invite you to come have that conversation with me, enrique@elevateepo.com. DM me at Precision Cycle TV on Instagram, tiktoks or thread. We're at Narcissism Nation on YouTube. If you want to break away from these fake, tough guy macho personas, dark psychology components, and get to real positive psychology that works to be authentic and to just magnetize and attract people that you wanna attract, gimme a call because I can guarantee you with the precision cycle methods. You will have a much more fulfilled dating life that you have ever had. And I'm not just saying that to sell subscriptions or to get you to call me in, that's not a marketing funnel. That is something that clients to this day continue to offer. as their feedback to what I've been able to help them get to, some of my clients have gone on to some of the greatest relationships that they've ever had in their life. Some of them have gone on to be some of the most productive relationship. Engagers, of their life, The types of texts that they receive and share with me are things that Andrew Tate wishes. women would text them, I invite you to call me because I can help you in your dating life. I can help you. Go from where you're at to double, triple, quadruple the numbers that you've seen, by helping you become the most well-regulated functional man in the room, precision cycle is here for you. Precision Cycle is here to revolutionize the dating game because you don't need tricks, you don't need scripts, you just need to be self calibrated, and you need to have our seven dimensional components tell you exactly how to do that. Thank you for your time. My name is Enrique. You can reach me at enrique@elevateepo.com I invite you to contact me if you're interested in getting help with your dating life. Thank you very much for your time, and we will be back on Monday. Have a great weekend. Thank you.