Why I Quit the Program Everyone Said Would Work | Your Trauma-Wise Career Guide Ep 48

Did you follow a program perfectly… and still fail? You're not alone. 💔

In this raw and honest episode, trauma-informed career coach Cyndi Bennett shares the story of how she invested thousands of dollars into a business coaching program, followed it exactly as instructed — and watched it fail. Not because she did anything wrong, but because the program was never designed for trauma survivors.

If you've ever trusted someone else's system over your own instincts, this episode is for you.

🎙️ What You'll Discover in This Episode:

✅ Why mainstream business and marketing programs can actively harm trauma survivors ✅ How psychological triggers in email marketing do the opposite of what trauma survivors need ✅ The moment Cyndi realized she trusted a program more than her own nervous system ✅ What "practicing the pause" looks like in real business decision-making ✅ How to reclaim your voice and choice as a trauma survivor AND business owner ✅ Why quitting the wrong path is actually an act of resilience — not failure

💡 Key Takeaway: The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is stop, pause, and choose a different direction — one that actually fits YOU and the people you serve.

🔗 Resources & Links: 📌 Learn more about the Resilient Career Academy: https://www.cyndibennettconsulting.com/resilientcareercoaching-waitlist 📌 Follow Cyndi on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/resilient_career_academy/

 00:00 – Introduction & Cyndi's Story Begins 01:15 – The Target Leave Date That Created Pressure 02:00 – Joining the Coaching Program & Investing Big 03:00 – Following the Program Exactly & Still Failing 04:00 – Why Psychological Triggers Hurt Trauma Survivors 05:00 – Zero Sign-Ups Despite Advertising Investment 05:45 – Practicing the Pause: Stopping to Evaluate 06:30 – The Realization: This Program Wasn't Trauma-Informed 07:30 – Ignoring Her Gut & the Cost of Not Trusting Herself 08:30 – You Have a Choice: Voice & Agency as a Survivor 09:30 – Canceling the Membership & Choosing a New Path 11:00 – Serving Over Selling: Cyndi's Real Goal 12:00 – Listening to Her Community Going Forward 13:00 – Encouragement for Trauma Survivor Business Owners 14:00 – Closing Message: You Are Resilient

When you're ready, here are 3 ways I can help you grow your career journey:

1. Free trauma-informed career development resources from my website! Visit https://www.cyndibennettconsulting.com for always up-to-date tips.
2. Ready to build a fulfilling career with trauma-informed support? Join The Resilient Career Academy Learning Community, where trauma survivors support each other, share resources, and develop career resilience in a safe, understanding environment
3. Ready for personalized trauma-informed career coaching? Explore my range of virtual coaching packages designed for different stages of your career journey. Visit my website to find the right support for where you are now. [Visit my website: https://www.cyndibennettconsulting.com/1-on-1-coaching]

DISCLOSURE: Some links I share might contain resources that you might find helpful. Whenever possible I use referral links, which means if you click any of the links in this video or description and make a purchase we may receive a small commission or other compensation at no cost to you.

Transcript

Cyndi: [00:00:00] I did everything they told me to do. I showed up, I did the work, and I followed the program to a T and it still wasn't working. It wasn't because I cut corners, took shortcuts, or did something wrong, and it took me a bit to realize that the system was not designed for me or the folks I serve-- Trauma survivors. 

Did you know that trauma impacts how we navigate our careers, but most career advice ignores this reality? Imagine feeling confident and safe at work while honoring your healing journey. Welcome to Your Trauma-Wise Career Guide, the podcast that reimagines career development for trauma survivors. I'm your host, Cyndi Bennett, a trauma survivor turned trauma-informed career coach and founder of the Resilient Career Academy. If you're navigating your career while honoring your healing journey, you are in the right [00:01:00] place.

Welcome back to Your Trauma-Wise Career Guide. I'm Cyndi Bennett, your host, and today I want to tell you a little story about something that I've just experienced in my role as a business owner.

About a year ago in June, I remember this very clearly, I saw a post-it note on my wall, and it was a target leave date for my day job, and it said March 12th, 2027. I looked at that and I was freaked out. I was under pressure and I was like, holy crap I'm not going to make it. I need to do something like quickly to get this business up and running to make money so that I can leave my day job because that was my target leave date.

And so I bit the bullet, I decided to join the coaching membership of this [00:02:00] program that I had taken this course on. It was a significant amount of money.

I followed the program to a T. I worked with my coaches. I showed up to the coaching sessions. I did all the work. I got feedback. I redesigned and revised everything, and it still didn't work. I was not getting any return on investment in this at all. And the reason that I was doing this was because I really was hoping to launch my business in a way that would be successful so that I could do this full-time and serve the people that I love serving and not have to be in the corporate world anymore.

I did multiple launches and did not have the big wins that I was seeing other people have, and I couldn't figure it out. I mean, I was doing everything by the book. I was following everything, and it just was not working.

But this [00:03:00] program promotes the way that you launch different programs. And this program promotes utilizing many emails and psychological triggers, which, by the way, if you're a trauma survivor, these things are very triggering to you. So, being a trauma survivor myself, I should have known that and I did know that, but did I have confidence in that knowledge that what they were telling me to do was the opposite of what my people needed me to do in order to be successful launching these programs. No, I didn't trust myself. I said, well, they know better than me. Obviously they've seen so much success and so many people have followed this program and they were all successful in making lots and lots of money doing this program. It should work for me if I follow it [00:04:00] exactly as it is.

And guess what? It didn't, it did not work for me. So after this last one, we had buildup and was implementing a new product and was launching it. I was so excited about it because it was something I was very much interested in, trauma-informed leadership, and I had zero people, zero people sign up. Zero.

And I realized, you know, I did everything... I even invested in advertising, which I had never done before. I invested in advertising for this to work. And what happened is over the course of this year, I have lost more people than I have gained in using this program and using this methodology.

And finally this past week, I had to be like I'm taking a time out here. I really need to think about this because I am working really hard at getting all these deliverables done, [00:05:00] in marketing deliverables, in emails. -- So many emails, and different things about, how do you do this and how do you do that? And I was doing that. Oh, by the way, and working my full-time job, right?

But none of it was working. And so I just had to stop and pause. So if you've been with me for a long time, you know that I talk about practicing the pause, so I too, practice the pause. So I had to pause and I had to really take a time out and say, is it me? Am I doing this program wrong? And the answer came back, no. I'm doing it exactly as it has been outlined. I followed it to a T.

And then I said, okay, but does this program fit my audience? And the answer was a shout from the inside out. No. Heck [00:06:00] no. This is not a trauma-informed program, therefore, it's not going to work with trauma survivors.

And so I had to like go, huh, okay. And the realization that this program was not designed for trauma survivors, it wasn't a trauma-informed program, and I had to sit with that for a moment because the reality was that I had more confidence in their program than I did in my own intuition. In knowing who my client was and who my customers are because I'm one of you all, and trusting what my intuition was saying, trusting what my nervous system was telling me.

Because you're not the only one who experienced those cringe moments when you received all those emails. I experienced it as I was writing it, and I [00:07:00] kept pushing it down and I kept ignoring it. And what happened was, it did the same thing that would've happened to me... it turned my folks off. It turned you all off. It turned me off.

And I had to sit with that result. And I had to say, okay, I'm going to pause. I'm going to stop here and I'm going to understand and acknowledge that this is not the right path for me.

Every one of us is on our own journey. And we get to decide what that journey looks like. And if you've been following this podcast for a while, especially last week, when I was talking about the power of saying no, and the ability to have a choice, which is a huge thing for trauma survivors to have voice and [00:08:00] choice.

And when you're a business owner, especially if you're a new business owner like I've been, you don't know exactly what you're supposed to do. You're not sure how to make it work. You're not sure how to stand it up. You only have what other people have said has been maybe successful for them. This model, this, whatever.

And you don't know any different. And so you try. I've been through tons of business training. And I've spent thousands and thousands of dollars on business training, all kinds of business training, and yet they're not trauma-informed.

And so, now I'm to the point where it's like, hold on, I know, and there is no doubt in my mind, I know my people well, because I am you. I know my people well. I know that this does not work for them, nor will it ever work for [00:09:00] them. And so I made that decision saying, you know what, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. And I had to come to that moment and say, I'm not going to do that.

I'm going to, I'm going to trust myself. I'm going to trust my gut. I'm going to trust my nervous system and I'm going to do something different. And sometimes we have to get off the path and we have to choose a new direction in our business. Something that, whatever our gut is telling us, we have to divert. We have to do something different, and that's what I decided to do this week.

And when I made that decision, this feeling of freedom and fear at the same time hit me. Freedom of, I don't have to follow a prescribed path, I don't have to do what somebody's telling me to do and it not [00:10:00] continue to work out for me. I have a choice. And so that choice became so powerful in me and it energized me having a choice to say, okay, I'm going to choose. I'm going to decide which way I go. I'm going to decide which things that I take on and which things I don't take on. And I'm going to do something different. And if it doesn't work out, that's okay, because I will learn and I will revise and I will go again. Because i'm a resilient career coach, and I'm a resilient trauma survivor.

And if you are a trauma survivor, you also are resilient. And if you are a business owner, you're a resilient business owner, because you've earned the right to be resilient. You've done all the things. You've survived, all the things that you've been through in your life, and so you are resilient.

And so I'm learning [00:11:00] that lesson today. I'm stepping away from a program. I canceled my membership before the year was up and I said, this is not working for my folks and here's why.

One thing that we don't need more of as trauma survivors are more psychological triggers, I can promise that. And the emails are like a death by a thousand paper cuts. It just feels wrong. It's not right. I'm not trying to sell as much as I'm trying to, serve. I'm trying to serve. That's my goal, to serve trauma survivors and to help them be successful.

And so, that's what I decided to do this week. This is amazing because I sat down, I did some journaling in my business journal, and I started to really look at where I was in my business and what was working and what wasn't working. And making the decision, a choice, as a business owner to say, I'm not going to invest my time and energy in that, [00:12:00] that's not working out. There's no return on investment for that. Instead, I want to focus on the things that I want to do and that my folks are telling me they want me to do. And I'm not going to listen to anybody else. I'm just going to listen to all of y'all telling me what you want me to do, what do you want me to talk about? What do you want training on? What do you want help on? You are the folks that I'm going to be listening to. I'm going to do the things that I feel passionate about and that I know are going to work because they work for me.

And so that's where I've been this week. And if you are a business owner and also a trauma survivor, there are scary times out there because you just don't know. It's filled with all kinds of uncertainty, but know that you have a choice. You get to choose how [00:13:00] you want to implement your business. You get to choose how you want to run your business, who you want to hire, what goals that you set, and if it's working for you. And if it's not, you get to make a different choice, and that's okay.

So I just wanted to share that little story with you because that's what I've experienced today and I'm continuing to learn as a business owner. I don't always get it right, but I'm going to continue to learn and I'm going to continue to iterate, and hopefully we will meet in the middle so that I can do this full time because I love being with trauma survivors. I love, love, love seeing you be successful. You're my heart. It's my passion of seeing trauma survivors be successful, because we've spent enough time being dragged down by our past, and we have a lot of obstacles to overcome and you don't have [00:14:00] to do it alone. You don't have to do it by yourself. We are here. We're working together, and we're on this path and on this journey together.

Thank you so much for watching Your Trauma-Wise Career Guide. Until next time.

You're not walking this path alone. Every step you take toward a trauma-wise career is an act of courage, and I'm here cheering you on. If today's episode resonated with you, share it with another survivor who needs to hear this message. Together, we're rewriting the rules of career success. Keep rising, keep healing, keep building.