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The Morning Brew with Chris Bennett
Ever wonder what really goes on at a small-town morning radio show?
The Morning Brew with Chris Bennett and Best Friends is your daily dose of real callers, big laughs, and unforgettable characters straight from QCountry 925 in Show Low, Arizona.
The Morning Brew with Chris Bennett
Measurements, Mullets, and Monday Motivation: A Morning Radio Odyssey
Sharks have ZERO bones? A redneck knows more shark facts than a radio DJ? Welcome to a Monday morning unlike any other on The Morning Brew!
We kick things off with Paul from Beaumont, our favorite Texas redneck, who shares his weekend adventures watching grandkids (while strategically avoiding diaper duty) and worrying about his sick Shih Tzu, Gilbert. When Paul joins our Shark Awareness Day trivia challenge, he shockingly sweeps the competition with his unexpected wealth of shark knowledge – proving that sometimes the student becomes the teacher.
The fun continues with our "Which is Longer?" contest where caller Kevin wins Thunder Raceway tickets by correctly guessing that anacondas outmeasure standard garage doors. We also check in on "Donkey Watch 2025" as an extremely pregnant rescue donkey named Haley keeps everyone in suspense, looking "like a little Goodyear blimp" according to her caretaker. Between laughs, we share exciting details about Chris Bennett's upcoming Comedy Birthday Bash featuring America's Got Talent finalist Ryan Neemiller on July 26th.
Did you know the world's longest recorded mullet measured 5'8" – way longer than a giraffe's tongue? Or that the world's largest playable guitar stretches 43 feet? We explore these bizarre measurements and more before wrapping up with Monday motivation: "Optimism is essential to achievement, and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress." Ready for your day to get better? Subscribe now and join us for more unexpected laughs and surprising facts tomorrow morning!
From the Horn Auto Center Studios Chris Bennett and the Morning Brew. Yee-yee, yee-yee. Everyone's favorite redneck from Beaumont, texas, it's Paul from Beaumont. Give us your Redneck Weekend Recap. Well, we watched Grandkids Friday and Saturday. Took my first guitar lesson from this new guy Saturday Nice, we ain't got a haircut. Yesterday I thought I was going to be bringing Gilbert to the 24-hour bed because he ain't felt good this weekend. Oh no.
Speaker 2:Your little shih tzu.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think he got allergies or something. I don't know what's going on. Your dog that is like so not, redneck, your dog has allergies.
Speaker 2:I don't know. I don't know if it's allergies. He's sneezing. It looked like he had the flu, or something.
Speaker 1:What does your dog sound like when he sneezes? I wish we had video of it. Well, I'm sorry Gilbert's not feeling well, but glad you got to spend some time with the grandkids. How many diapers did you change this weekend? Zero, zero. I didn't even clean no backsides. I told Rhonda.
Speaker 2:She was still in bed. I said, hey, get in the bathroom.
Speaker 1:And so Rhonda has to do all the diaper changing and the backseat All the dirty work yeah.
Speaker 1:All the dirty work. I ain't doing no dirty work. Well, paul, today is Shark Awareness Day. How about we do a little? Are you Smarter Than a Redneck shark? Trivia Duh duh, duh, duh, yeah, from the Horn Auto Center Studios, chris Bennett and the Morning Brew. You know what that sound means it's time for. Are you Smarter Than a Redneck Shark? Trivia for Shark Awareness Day. Paul, if you know the answer, say your name. That's your buzzer. Are you ready? I'm about ready, as I'm ever going to be. All right, all these questions, the answers are going to be numbers. So it's closest, without going over Price is right rules. How many teeth does a great white shark have, chris? I'm going to say 350. What say you At one time? I'm going to say 50. Closest, without going over Paul, correct answer 300 teeth is how many a white shark has. All right, here we go. How many shark species are there, chris? I'm going to say 72.
Speaker 2:I'm going to say 100.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say 100. Paul is closest, without going over, but we're both way off. There's 1,199 different shark species, paul, wow, all right. And last question, this one if I get it right, it's worth a million points. I win. How many bones does a shark have, paul? Paul, zero, zero, holy moly, he swept me. He is smarter than a radio DJ when it comes to sharks. Way to go, paul. Why do you know so much about sharks? Are there a lot of sharks down in the ocean over in Houston? Yeah, oh, there are. Yeah, we got tiger sharks.
Speaker 1:We got lemon sharks. We got sand sharks, we got. I sound like Bubba Gump.
Speaker 2:You sound?
Speaker 1:like Bubba Gump, we got lemonhead sharks. Yeah Well, paul, thanks for calling in and having fun with us today, on this Monday morning, and congratulations on being smarter than a very handsome radio DJ. We'll talk to you tomorrow.
Speaker 2:All right, buddy, y'all have a great day, you too. Bye.
Speaker 1:Good morning, it's the Morning Brew with Chris. Who's this, kevin? Kevin, are you calling to win your choice of D-back tickets or Thunder Raceway tickets, compliments of Comfort Fit Dentures? Oh, yeah, all right, all you have to do is get three out of five right for this game called.
Speaker 1:Which is longer on this tape measure day? Which is longer a football field or the world's longest canoe? Probably a football field. Is it football field? You are correct, football field is about 300 feet. The largest canoe is only 150 feet. Which one is longer? A great white shark or the longest French fry ever recorded? Great white shark? Heck, yeah, they're 15 to 20 feet. The longest French fry ever recorded 34 inches. That's pretty long. All right, you're one away from winning these tickets. Which is longer? A green anaconda? You ain't want none, unless you got buns, hon. Or a standard garage door. Which is longer? Anaconda? Anaconda, he wants some Hon. Congratulations, kevin. Three for three. With which is longer on this tape measure day? Which tickets you taking? Thunder Raceway, thunder Raceway, compliments of Comfort Fit Dentures. You'll feel comfortable always. What station hooked you up? 92.5. You know it, janine, you over there. Yes, I am Just station hooked you up? 92.5. You know it, janine, you over there yes.
Speaker 1:I am Just waiting for you. Heck, yeah man. I have been waiting with bated breath for Donkey Watch 2025.
Speaker 2:You know what? I am getting more text messages and I don't know what she's doing. My husband Clint, he says that she's taunting me. Yeah, she'll like I swear she'll look over toward the house and she'll like, lay down and she'll roll around a little bit, and then she stands up and then I come out and she just starts eating her hay and just laughs at me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know no, my gosh, how long Is this her first baby?
Speaker 2:No, she's had many, many. She's older. That's why we're watching her, because she's old and this is her last baby. She's a rescue donkey and we're fostering her and basically I adore her. She's so sweet. She's a sweet little thing and got her healthy. But nobody really knows when the babies do and it's a little too late for the right type of ultrasound, right. So it's kind of guesses, but she's hit all the marks and all the stuff that you notice that you know she's all bagged up and she waxed a couple of weeks ago. But it's just, it's on her own terms and time, of course, and on this baby we want it to be right. But oh my gosh, she looks like a little blimp.
Speaker 1:Come on, haley the donkey. Come on Haley. Oh, maybe we should sell some advertisement on the side of her.
Speaker 2:Take some bets. She looks like a little Goodyear blimp Exactly she does.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you for the Donkey Watch update. Do you want a Chris Bennett's Comedy Birthday Bash ticket update? Yes, yes, that's right. Well, I'll be in New Mexico this week headlining a comedy show Thursday night at the end of the Mountain Gods. But next week we are less than two weeks away for Chris Bennett's Comedy Birthday Bash. It's going to be at the Show Low Elks Lodge on Saturday, july 26. Doors, aliberto's Food Truck and the bar open up at 530. Show starts at 7. It is 21 and over and our headliner is Ryan Neemiller, very funny headlining comedian from around the country, america's.
Speaker 2:Got Talent Top three finalists of season 14 is Ryan Neemiller very funny headlining comedian from around the country, america's. Got Talent.
Speaker 1:Top three finalists of season 14. Also my friend Cricket Gill, who won Funniest Person in the Valley 2024, which I won in 2004.
Speaker 2:Very cool, that's so cool.
Speaker 1:So she's come out and then we have two local guest sets, some White Mountain Residents trying comedy Bryce Robey and Joe G and VIP tickets are almost sold out, janine.
Speaker 2:Nice.
Speaker 1:It's our biggest show yet over 200 tickets and we're over 50% sold out already.
Speaker 2:July 26th, so exciting, get your tickets at chrisbennettcomedycom chrisbennettcomedycom.
Speaker 1:Janine, when we come back, you're going to tell me it's an interesting holiday.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we have an interesting holiday today. A twofer, yeah, there we go.
Speaker 1:It is Monday, July 14th. What are some fake holidays going on today?
Speaker 2:These are funny. It is National Nude Day, nakedness right, but National Tape Measure Day. Those go kind of interesting hand in hand would you say yeah, all right.
Speaker 1:Well, happy Tape Measure Day and happy Nude Day. I Things that you measure. Well, actually I have a fun game for us to play for Tape. Measure Day it's called which is Longer. I'm going to give you two items and you have to see if you can guess which one is the longer of the item you ready and it's not in the mirror, like these things may appear.
Speaker 2:No, no, no. These are real measurements. These are real measurements, all right.
Speaker 1:Which is longer a giraffe's tongue or the longest recorded mullet?
Speaker 2:A giraffe's tongue.
Speaker 1:No, a giraffe's tongue is 20 inches. The longest recorded mullet in history was 5'8". Oh, my gosh, oh my gosh. Yeah, cool, all right. Next one which is longer, the longest human tooth ever extracted or the longest ingrown hair?
Speaker 2:ever extracted. I'm going to go with the tooth. Well, I'm going to go with the hair, because that's so weird.
Speaker 1:It is hair, there you go. There's another gross one, yeah three inches and the longest human tooth ever extracted was 1.46 inches. Oh wow, all right. Which is longer? The world's largest playable guitar or a school bus? School bus, no, the world's largest playable guitar is 43 feet 5 foot long. A bus is usually 35 feet and that guitar is also over 2,000 pounds. All right, last one, janine, let's see if you could get this right. Which is longer? The world's tallest cowboy boot sculpture or Shaquille O'Neal laying end-to-end twice?
Speaker 2:End-to-end twice. I'm going to go with the cowboy boot.
Speaker 1:There you go, it is 35 feet and Shaquille O'Neal is 7 foot 1, so times 2, you're looking at 24 feet, so the world's tallest cowboy boot is longer. There you go.
Speaker 2:All right, fun that was fun.
Speaker 1:Yeah, how about we get motivated with?
Speaker 2:it All right, let's do it.
Speaker 1:All right, Janine, let's get motivated with it, Please it's Monday, all right, here's some motivational thoughts for you. You tell me which one's your favorite. First one's from Michael Alstuler. It says the bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot. Is that good? It's okay. That's okay. Oh, not great, all right. Nicholas Murray Butler said optimism is essential to achievement and it's also the foundation of courage and true progress.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, okay, no, no, no, I like it.
Speaker 1:You like it, it's okay. I think people need to be more optimistic. Yes, for sure. Cheryl Sandberg said done is better than perfect. Hmm, okay, it's simple. I like that, okay. Eleanor Roosevelt said the purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experiences.
Speaker 2:Okay, and the?
Speaker 1:last one is from Anonymous Keep calm and pretend it's not Monday.
Speaker 2:There you go. There you go. Just pretend it's not Monday, just be delusional and move forward. I'm going to go with number two. I do like it.
Speaker 1:The positive Optimism, oh yes, so our motivational quote for the week, optimism is essential to achievement, and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress. There we go All right. That is our motivational quote for the week. Janine, thank you for having fun with this and I hope you have a great rest of your day.
Speaker 2:You have an awesome day, Chris. Thank you.
