Singles Partners Marrieds Long Time Marrieds Podcast
Couples counselling is not necessarily about keeping a couple together at all. All about exploring options; to help you both gain insight and understanding about self and how you do life, as an individual.
Whether a Partnership or a marriage, these things are true: “Marriage is not the coming together of two people. It’s a clash of two cultures, two experiences, two memories, two habits, two morals, two values. And that is a formula for destruction” - Dr Myles Munro
“[It] is [also] the place of our healing. So don’t leave it too quickly” - Dr Creflo Dollar
You are destined to repeat the issues with a new partner. So, work it through with this partner, to better understand self; then you are in a better place to make an informed decision whether to stay or leave.
So, let’s begin our work together to detoxify the issues and get you closer to your abundant life living - bringing colour back to life - without Shame.
Here are some of the topics covered in the programme: “An Eclectic mix” of counselling and psychotherapy models. Those models include psychodynamic, Systemic, CBT, EMDR, EFT, Gottman, how the past has its tentacles in our present and is affecting our future; moving as much issues from the unseen (the unconscious); better understanding of Shame, Anger, Attachment, Addictions, Trauma, Grief/loss, Narcissism, Depression. (Trauma is the internal wound).
Not quickly, but by small incremental steps, not big leaps; neural pathways; Childhood development; The brain does not like pain; Childhood development can throw up a lot of clues if you go looking; Connecting with the unfinished business of childhood - which holds the keys to the adult behaviours - means finding and re-nurturing the child in you; recover from Sex, Porn, Love Addiction; equipped to become the author of your new destiny. Your future; Get knowledge. Get understanding.
Then reclaim your life; bring about change – over time, on the way to your recovery.
Gary McFarlane of The Kairos Centre launched a comprehensive Video-on-Demand Online Course (for Singles, Pre-Married prep, Partnerships, Couples, Marrieds, long, long time Marrieds/Partners) bringing together his experience with hundreds of Singles and couples over 23 years and a few books written on the subjects. (Visit www.kairos-centre.com).
Key words: Marriage Counseling, Relationship Advice, Marriage Tips, Couples Therapy, Healthy Relationships, Conflict Resolution in Marriage, Conflict management, Conflict Resolution, Marriage Communication, Building Trust in Relationships, intimacy in Marriage, Marriage Recovery, Sex in Relationships, Sex in Marriage, Sex not working, Sex dysfunction, Sex problems, Attachment issues in relationship, Childhood issues in relationship, Marriage Counsellor, Marriage Counselling, Couples counselling, Singles and issues
Singles Partners Marrieds Long Time Marrieds Podcast
Couples in a See-saw dance for years
Split agendas and contrary motives - that are hidden from each other. Is that you?
Jake & Jasmine on the seesaw of life, illustrates it. There are appearances, but below the surface of the relationship may be there is entrenched Emotional Disengagement. Couples engage in a dance for years, re-acting and counter re-acting to each others actions and inactions. A dance. A dance which keeps being played out.
'If you will, I will. If you won't, I won't''. Worlds away from - 'If you are ok, then I am ok. If you are not ok, then I am not ok and I need to make you ok so I can be ok, because if you are not ok, then I can't be ok'. (That utterance was during the early stages of the wedding vows).
The couples are now trying to restore a level of homeostasis/equilibrium/balance/relative harmony - to make life together, a bit more enduring/bearable.
In fact - as you observe the dance which Jake and Jasmine are doing on the seesaw of life, the exact opposite of harmony and bearable is being played out; each responds to the other to create a counter-balance that ends up with a steeper incline pulling them downwards; which is just not sustainable in the longer term.
At some point, lack of conscious choice (but knee-jerk responses to the others' movements) - means that at some point choice will be removed from them both. There will be an explosion of the relationship - but perhaps not for many, many years. Maybe the cue is when the children leave home for university or house prices increase to a level that triggers the explosion because there is now enough equity for them both to buy separate properties.
The exploded relationship leaves them both scrambling around to pick up shracknel. Onlookers observe with sentiments of - 'they were such a lovely couple. We never saw that coming!'
Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.
Bringing colour back to life - without Shame.
Video-on-Demand Online Course (for Singles, Couples/Marrieds/Partners) Access: https://www.kairos-centre.com/singles-couples-partners-marriage-programme/
Gary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.
Episode keywords: Couples Therapy,Relationship Advice,Building Healthy Relationships,Communication in Relationships,Conflict Resolution,Intimacy and Connection,Relationship Coaching,Navigating Relationship Challenges,Love and Commitment,Couples Counseling,Conflict Resolution in Relationships,Relationship Conflict Management,Couples Conflict,Navigating Relationship Disagreements,Healthy Communication in Relationships,Partnership Dynamics,Resolving Relationship Issues,Emotional Intelligence in Conflict,Building Trust During Conflict,Effective Communication Strategies,Sex help,Sex not working,Sex Therapy,Psychosexual,Psychosexual help,Healthy Relationships,Empowerment Self-Discovery,Healing Journeys,Personal Growth,Intimacy Building,Addiction in Relationship,Infidelity Online Therapy,The Kairos Centre Peer Pressure,Performance Pressure,Separation,Divorce,Fear,Anxiety,Stress,Mental Health and Addiction, Dissociation,Anger,Husband has porn,EMDR,wife cheating,wife has porn,wife has another man,wife with a woman,husband with a man,Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing,Compulsive Behavior,Trauma Healing,Neuroplasticity,Online Therapy,Self-Soothing Behaviors,Childhood Trauma,Inner Child work,Childhood Development and Addiction bullying,Porn Addiction Recovery,Abuse,Sexual Abuse,Spiritual abuse,Church abuse,Minister abuse, Pastor abuse,Sex Addiction Recovery,Domestic Violence,Family Conflict,