#88 Danny Norris

Coach Danny Norris is the Head Football Coach at Benjamin Franklin High School in Queen Creek, Arizona. Danny shares how faith, character, and intentional leadership have become the foundation of his coaching philosophy, discussing the importance of serving others, building authentic relationships, and creating a program where love, accountability, and high standards coexist. He reflects on his journey from coaching programs with fewer than 15 players to leading one of Arizona's premier football programs, while offering practical insights on developing coaches, mentoring young athletes, and leading with integrity both on and off the field. Danny also explains why the greatest responsibility of a coach is not simply winning games, but modeling the character and values that shape the next generation of leaders.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:04

So you grab all your family. Yeah. For sure. Appreciate that. Um well I'm glad things are going well. So I'll go ahead and introduce you. Um coach Danny Norris. You're the head football coach at Ben Franklin in the Queen Creek, East Valley area of Phoenix. Um you've been you're going into your fourth year, aren't you?

SPEAKER_00 0:29

I am. Yeah. So you're four for us here at Benjamin Franklin.

SPEAKER_01 0:34

Good, good. Before Ben Franklin and we got to know each other when you were at Gilbert Christian, um, I think you were there for four years, right? I was, yes, sir. Yeah, so turn that program around. And then your first head coaching job was at North Point Prep. Um and I didn't know this, Danny, until I started reading. But when you took over that program, you guys only had six kids, six players in your program. Yeah. That's wild.

SPEAKER_00 1:04

It was yeah. It was it was a fun ride, man. I was actually there four years. I was a defensive coordinator for the first two years, and then I became the head coach for those last two years. So I actually spent it seems like four years is kind of my my my time limit, I guess, at some schools. But that was uh an interesting situation in North Point Prep, but you know, it really helped mold me into the coach I am and just an interesting community of kids there. You know, not a ton of football players that grew up playing the game, and we just got them to buy in and and had a really good last two years there of committed players. I remember in 2016, my my second year as the DC, we went and played Castile with like 14 guys, and and it was brutal. And we finished the game with 11 and and and but our kids played. And I and I always say it, you know, when people ask about cancellations and forfeits and things like that. That wasn't a thing before COVID. And I think people became too comfortable with it after then. We brought less than 15 guys to every game, our first two years there as a DC, and we played. And and the kids really grew and they learned how to fight through adversity. And when we had those two, you know, years as the head coach, we went two and eight the first year, but we had 35 kids in the program. And then my last year as a head coach, we had over 40 and we went eight and three. And I think they learned it because they stuck through those hard times and and learned how to, again, like fight through the adversity and not give up, but to show up every day and put forth their best effort, and it turned into you know a pretty successful season that last year.

SPEAKER_01 2:41

Yeah, well, that's that's pretty incredible. You guys just didn't play. I mean, you you were competing so um at a high level. So that's that's impressive. Hey, here's one of the and and you've kind of seen some of the people that I've had on, but um I wanted a a big part of the reason, not not only just because you're I think you're a tremendous football coach, but um I know a lot of coaches, we both do, and there's coaches out there that preach character, um, you know, preach I don't want to say preach the word to their kids, but but they they have an extremely strong faith. Um they're they're locked into the Lord, and and this has become more and more prevalent in my life since I got out of it. Um just giving my life over to the Lord again, getting baptized again, and and um, you know, read my scriptures daily. And and and but besides that, you you have always since the moment I met you, you were one of those men that you truly do what you say. You truly live by um what you in what you are trying to instill in the young men that you coach and the young men, you know, and young ladies and people that you teach. You you live the word, your your character is unmatched, you know. I I don't really do Twitter, but I'm on it. Um you call people out that that aren't doing things the right way or trying to get your kids or stuff like that. And what I've noticed, and and Preston Jones was like this too. Preston could call people out because he didn't have anything to hide. He I I mean, you know, we've all made mistakes, we've all not lived, you know, um the right way at times. But you you you're a man of steel in my opinion, and very important to me just in my own personal journey, but more so because I didn't always live that way when I was coaching, you know. Um I would say don't do this and don't do that, and then I would go and and not knowing at the time that I was doing it, but um I've recognized that. And and so I wanted to start off and just ask you um to share if if you're okay with it, kind of your story about um why it's so important for you to be an example of character and be an example of a man of God um for the young people that that you have an impact on.

SPEAKER_00 5:26

Man, I would love to. And and God bless you, brother. It's awesome to hear that you're walking in faith now and and following the Lord's plan for your life. That's that's just a blessing to hear. Uh, and you know, for me, it's hard because I wasn't a believer until I was 21. And and I wasn't some amazing football player. I I had some decent success. I was just your average high school football player. I went to San Judeo Connor High School and I was doing a lot of the wrong things in high school. I I wasn't, you know, I was a straight A student, I was a varsity football player, and I was doing all the things that you probably see on TV shows of weekends and just acting like a knucklehead. But I was able to justify my life because I was successful where where it where I thought it mattered in the classroom, you know, on the football field, people weren't seeing me at my highlights, you know, they weren't seeing me at my lowlights on Friday nights, what Saturday nights, uh, and things of that nature. And we were just making bad decisions as a friend group. And it wasn't until my last year, I went to Grand Canyon University for my last two years of college. And that was when it was still a smaller school. And we had probably 2,000 students on campus at GCU back when I attended there. I graduated in 2012. And I was attracted to GCU for two reasons. My sister was the associate head softball coach there. But also their school motto at that time, and might still be, I'm not, I'm unsure, unfamiliar with how they do it now, but it was find your purpose. And that, those three words resonated with me so much because, you know, I was by all means a successful person in the strength conditioning world at that time. I didn't have my four-year degree yet, but I had just finished up an internship with a gentleman named Ethan Banning, who I think is one of the best strength coaches in the entire world. He's just absolutely phenomenal. Him in triple threat performance brought me in for a summer. And I had a chance to work with hundreds of student athletes in the East Valley, specifically at Red Mountain High School. And we had some guys at Chaparrell as well. And I just had an opportunity to connect with young guys and see the impact that our words make and have in their lives. And while I was attending GCU, they had us take a Christian worldview class, which was completely brand new to me. I I had been to, you know, Catholic Mass with my grandmother growing up once or twice a year, and that was really about it. So I didn't have a faith background. And I remember attending a service at CCV, the Christ Church of the Valley on 67th Avenue in Happy Valley. And I remember this song coming on, and it was titled One Thing Remains, and it talks about God's love and how it never gives up, it never runs out, and it never fails. And I had never really experienced that type of emotion before, you know, sitting in that large worship hall by myself, you know, surrounded by a thousand other people, and never feeling more alone. But then hearing that song and hearing that message, like God's timing was perfect for my life. At 21, I surrendered my life to Christ. I had a ton of great mentors. I was a personal trainer at that time. And we had a I trained a guy named Nick Medlock, and he was a deacon in his church. And it was just perfect timing for me. You know, the young lady I was dating at the time was a believer. And it was just, God had placed all the people in my life at the right time for me to hear his message, for me to hear his word, and for me to be in the position as a football coach to impact the lives of young men and young women. Um, and and as I grew and as I learned as I matured, I really understood the value of my words and the value of the impact that I can have on football players and non-football players. I was a track and field head coach as well. So understanding that they're looking at me to be an example for them. And my greatest impact that I think I can have on the future of young men and young women is to provide them an example of somebody who is above reproach, that that is someone that lives the way they say they're supposed to. The one that, like you said, right, not do one, not say one thing and do another. I I think it's really important. Uh I had an athletic direct, two athletic directors at Gilbert Christian my time there, Matt Johnson and Mark Dutzman. And they were just so influential in my life of, you know, not just encouraging me, but challenging me. Challenging me in so many ways to challenge our players, to challenge our young men, to challenge our young women to be above reproach, to know that the things that we do in our lives truly matter. And our teenagers see more than we think they do. Right. Like they're, they're not, they're not, they are so intelligent and they have so much access nowadays to us. Where when I was in high school, I don't ever remember sitting in my head coach's office and just hanging out. And and in my office at at Benjamin Franklin is it's like a revolving door of players that come in at all times. And I love it. And I think it's because my heart is is for them. My heart is for them, and I desire to see them grow and mature and and and understand that their impact in life is so much bigger than themselves. It's about everybody else. It's not about them. And I think that that's something that I can do and instill in them a life of service, a life of love, a life of care, then it doesn't matter what we do on the field. You know, I was told one time that the team plays on Friday nights, but the program lives year-round. And that's my desire for our young men in our program is to know that the what they represent and who they represent is far greater than who they are as a singular person.

SPEAKER_01 11:04

Yeah. No, that's that's amazing. And I appreciate you sharing that. Um sticking on the service and love, because I would say about 90% of the coaches that have jumped on here, at some point in the podcast, you know, they'll we'll get around to, you know, the most important things, the standards, what's what's most important as a as a coach and as a leader to instill in in the people, the young people that you have an impact on. And 90% of them, that's one of the things that they mention is love. And I've always I've always I I always coach because I felt like coaching was a service industry for me. And I was there to serve, I mean, obviously at the high school level, you don't get paid, I mean, it's pennies on the dollar, right? For but that's not why we do it. And and when I would hire coaches, I would always have that conversation with them. And I and I've I've found that a lot of that get that gets lost. The fact that when a coach believes that he's serving, to to really make that a point with his you know, with with a program and with a school for that matter, kids that he's impacting is you know, you have to serve. So along along with that, before I get into the love aspect, because that's kind of a a a funny dynamic being a football coach, right? But as far as serving, how how do you what what are some things that you do as a coach? What are some things that your program does? What are some things that the kids are involved in with Ben Franklin that that Ben Franklin does to really emphasize the service part that that we are all human beings here to serve? And and I'll tell you a story after after you tell me that. But um Yeah, what what are some things you do that other coaches can do to really to really drive home the service point that hey, as a young adult, you you need to learn how to serve.

SPEAKER_00 13:13

I'll tell you, I'm fortunate at being at a school like Benjamin Franklin. And and and certainly the schools that I've been in have been calculated decisions because you have to have an administration that supports a vision. You have to have a community of parents and and students who who want to do the difficult things, who want to go out of their way to be selfless and and and do more than their own things for just their own lives. Uh so we're in a community where it's just kind of ingrained in them. And I'm super grateful to have been able to follow in the footsteps of Dave Jeffries, the head coach prior to me, who's a great friend of mine. It was a situation on the outside looking in. Had people not known, like they think, oh man, you're going to a one-to-nine program that just is in shambles. Well, it wasn't, right? Dave had a, it was a down year. They were playing in the 4-A conference, and it was just difficult. But Dave has been so great in building this program. You know, he got there year two of the high school and he instilled in this group of just character, integrity, discipline. And that's just carried on throughout. We're a pretty unique school in the sense of yes, we're a charter school, but we're not a business. We're actually in the business of educating the hearts and the minds of our students in a wholesome environment. We're a K through 12 system. We have three K6 campuses, and then the campus we're at is actually a 7 through 12, which provides an enormous amount of opportunities for our high school players to be front and center for the younger generations that are going to come before them. So we attend the elementary campuses a decent amount with our players. We try and get them out there in the front wearing their jerseys. And we have our our future chargers camps that we do where we're our our players run that show. Those, you know, kindergarten through sixth graders, they don't want to hear from the head football coach. They want to hear from the guys that are doing it. They want to hear from Amon Alexander, who's going to go to Stanford University on a full ride football scholarship, not just because he's a great football player, but because he's a great human and great student. And he's someone that I can just point out right now. Ammon, he worked all of our future Chargers camps that we'd ever done in my four years here. And I'm sure he was doing it when he was, you know, in seventh and eighth grade as well with Dave Jeffries. But he coaches our junior high football team as well. So he coaches the offensive line. We play junior high football in the winter. That's seventh and eighth grade football is huge for us. That's a huge part of how we grow our program. Our varsity staff coaches that group in the winter. And it's phenomenal. We go Monday through Thursday. We practice Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. We play games on Thursday, and then they're off Friday through Sunday. And we play during the third quarter of the school year, so January to March. And we have so many of our current high school football players that come out that takeaway, you know, that we don't pay them at all. You know, we we barely pay our coaches, you know. So our our teenagers just come out literally for the love of the game and to impart their wisdom and to pass on that their gifts of what they've learned from being in the Benjamin Franklin school system and the football program. Uh so Ammon is one of those guys that hardly ever missed a practice. He was always at games. He was the biggest cheerleader for our players. And that's his heart of service that he learned at home before us, you know, long before us. That's part of being in the community. His mother is such a great testament to what it looks like to be a parent, right? She raised those three young boys who are all Division I football players now, two at BYU and one now going to Stanford. And that it's part of finding the right community, I think, of parents that really push that. Um, but then we do service projects around the school as well. We have a facilities manager named Brian Mace who is one of the most selfless people you ever meet. He waters our turf field, he lines our grass field, he's mowing all the grass, he's making sure everything's nice and tidy. You know, we're not above having some knuckleheads on campus that vandalize some certain things, and he's always fixing whatever needs to be fixed. Uh he's just amazing. So we find every single opportunity we can to serve him. So this summer, we ended up moving over 150 science tables for him after practice one day. That's awesome. We moved the benches. Yeah. And and just nothing is too small for us to be able to do. If we see a need, we feel a need. And I think that's super important. And it's really about serving our community right now. You know, just going into year four of this program, I want our Benjamin Franklin Charter Schools community to know that our football program, yes, it's had a ton of success on the football field, but more so than that, we have so much, we have so many amazing young men that have hearts for people, and and no job is too big or too small for them to roll up their sleeves and get to work. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:50

You know, it's um one of the first, I don't know, 10 episodes that we did. I had um Kurt Heinz on. Um, not sure if you know him. And um, you know, so we formed a pretty good relationship, but he said on there, we were talking about, you know, his faith, and we were talking about how does he try and incorporate his faith within his program. And you know, he he brought up, he said, you know, it's really tricky, he said, because he's he's himself is huge into FCA. Um but he wasn't necessarily pushing it, but he was encouraging it. And you know, the district came to him that he was coaching and it's like, you can't, you can't, you know, do that. And he's like, I'm here to lead young people, and if they want to know Christ better and get closer to Christ, then that's that's part of my you know, my duties as as the leader and as a head coach of the program. Um so I I just I'm mentioning that because what you initially said about the supportive administration is huge. And I know for me, you know, like I said, I I I've kind of, you know, my faith has always been strong. Now, whether I've lived in that faith or not is has has changed over time. Um, but I've always had a strong faith, and that was ingrained in me. I mean, early as a young kid, because we went to church all the time, and I didn't go to Sunday school. From the time I can remember, I went to regular church with my parents. But I'm not Catholic, but at the time in high school, I went to Loyola High School, which is in Los Angeles, which is an all-boys Jesuit school. So at the time we were in with served by modern-day St. John Bosco, Cresby, um Bishop, I think. But um, that was the greatest experience of my life because here I am at a school with just boys, and the you know, I want to say the administration, but the administration, the majority of them were, you know, priests or bishops or something that had to do with serving the church. And right, not only did I learn so much about myself, but you know, their motto, one of their mottos is you know, serve others. And um, you know, but that was a different time. Is it is it hard for you to really um encourage your athletes to to dive into their faith and and know the Lord better?

SPEAKER_00 20:25

You know, when I when I got the job, part of my presentation was about you know, family purpose, moral purpose, spiritual purpose. And being a Gilbert Christian for four years, that was obviously built into who we were. That was a given, right? We were gonna have chapel every Tuesday, we were going to have small groups every Wednesday. Going over to Benjamin Franklin, we have a lot of believers at that school. And we have a lot of people who value their faith. And it's not for me to necessarily push beliefs on them, but rather to live out God's word with my life, with my actions, to be a servant of him in so many ways where I'm not outwardly expressing my faith, but it's no secret to the people in our community of where I came from, what I believe, the type of life that I live. And we try and hire coaches that's the same way. And I say try, we do. I have not had a single interview with a football coach on our staff where the first thing we talked about was football. That doesn't matter to me. That that is, we could teach you how to be a football coach. We can teach you X's and O's, we can teach you how to stack a receiver or or block wide zone. We can do all those things, right? We don't we don't need to have excellent X's and O's. We need to have excellent people in our program. And the first thing we talk about is who are you? Right? If if I talk Took away your title of coach, who are you as a man? What do you stand for? What do you believe in? How do you lead your family? What are the what are the most important things that you can say as a as a coach? What are the most what are the greatest impacts you've made on others' lives? How do you serve your players? We have our our four words for our coaches this year are connect, serve, pray, and love. And we have to be excellent in all four of those things. And we can't serve unless we connect. We can pray at all times. But it's really, I've always found it funny where you know I've been assistant on a staff, or maybe even I've been the head coach at times. I've been the guy that got on players. And at the end of it, you're like, hey, you know I love you, right? And the player's like, no, I don't know that. I I don't see it. But that's the connection piece that we we miss sometimes. So when we talk about, you know, just living the life, I think it's evident to our players. Um, we do have, you know, seminary where our young men are able to go to our young men and women, right? They have a seminary period they can go to, and that's not just open to the LDS faith. They we had a young man two years ago who would go down to Rock Point Church. And and those are those are periods that are open to it's release time. They can kind of go wherever they need to go for their but I've been at schools where you know we've had, you know, at North Point, we had a really high Muslim, you know, um I didn't know uh population. Yeah. And we had a kicker and linebacker, Ali al-Shitawi, and he went through an entire summer practice during Ramadan. And, you know, sun up to sundown, it it was no eating. And he gritted through it, he grinded through it, he knew the value of what we were doing. And of course, we had to be protective over him and make sure that we weren't pushing him too much. But similar to Benjamin Franklin, we have people of all different belief systems, but they all believe in a spiritual purpose. And if I can feed that through the life that I live, the words that I speak to our players, if I'm my principal at Gilbert Christian had a very big term speak life, which he learned from his principal up in Life Christian Academy in Tacoma, Washington. If we can speak life to our players, if we can live in a way that we are above reproach and we know that our actions matter more than just our words, then they're gonna be led. They're they're gonna be led. And I pray for every single one of our players individually, whether they know it or not. And we have a lot of players that do the same thing as well. So we have we had a young man who unfortunately had a pretty, you know, terrible uh injury this season during this summer during uh seven on seven, and he got hurt on a Thursday. He went to the hospital, they set his leg, they sent him home, and then on that Monday morning, he was gonna have surgery. Well, before he went to Phoenix Children's Hospital to get a surgery, his parents drove him to s to football. And we're there 6 a.m. to 8:30. And without being asked, our entire team prayed over him before he went over, you know, in the Phoenix Children's Hospital for a surgery. And I think that's a testament to, of course, our administration who values who I am as a person, but values the people that we bring in as coaches as well. And we have coaches from all different belief systems as well, and we all believe in a higher purpose. And I think it's just a matter of leading our young men well and doing and doing in a manner in a in a way that they know that we do want to connect with them, we want to serve them, we want to pray for them, we want to love them. And those are the four things that I value as a as a head football coach, and something that I really appreciate with with who I have as assistant coaches at Benjamin Franklin.

SPEAKER_01 25:45

Yeah. No, that's that's amazing. I I mean, I I always ask people what three to five standards belief system, you know, that they are always pushing. Because as you know, I mean, you know, a lot of people talk expectations and and it goes far beyond expectations. I mean, I used to too, but it's more standards. It's, you know, and then you want to have 10 or 12 of them, and you only need three to five, you know, be and and those are the three to five that every single person within your program and outside the program, parents included, and community, know that you are talking about and you are living. I mean, you know, we talk about culture. I'm I'm not big on the word culture, but I I use it, you know, with with all my systems, with all my coach curriculum, athletic director curriculum, all that stuff with my LLC and the foundation. Because that's what people know, right? The word culture. And it and it's culture is different everywhere because it's how it's what you do on a daily basis. And so there's always three to five things. So that's amazing. I I so I want to ask you about love because you you did say, you know, two of the four things were connect and love. Um and I I think personally those two go hand in hand. But and and being a football coach, I mean, we're gonna get on kids, you know. We're we yeah, I mean, you have to certain kids you have to break down and build back up, right? Um, certain kids can can can take harder coaching where other kids can't. I mean, things are completely different. So how do you in your staff display that you that you love the kids and and like you said, I mean, most kids don't think about it. When we were growing up, you know, my coach was was the hardest one of the hardest men I've ever been around, and I love him and I talked to him. I mean, and we butted heads, and I I talked to him, you know, a couple he's 80 years old, and I talk to him, you know, once every two months. But um, what he did for me, and I never was curious as if he loved me. I just you just kind of knew that. Um so what do you guys do to really emphasize that because it's important.

SPEAKER_00 27:56

So I think you're it's so important. I think it's the most important thing that we can do as coaches is to love our players. And I think you're right about, you know, growing up, you know, when I was a high school football player, like I said, I I never really sat in my coach's office, you know, and it wasn't because I was fearful of him, it was because I knew he had other things to be doing, right? He was, he was but I think now we have a greater relationship than I did when I was 14 to 18 years old, you know, because I'm able to lean on him in some ways as a head football coach now and kind of following, you know, his path in some ways. Um, but our players just they don't just know it because we show up. They know it because our coaches are so intentional with their words, they're intentional with their actions. One of the core pillars of Benjamin Franklin charter schools is intentional, intentionally being intentionally positive and promoting civility. And being intentionally positive is not always being the cheerful guy who says everything's gonna be okay, guys. Like, no, we need to challenge them to raise the standards. We need to challenge them to do certain things. And we have what we call at Benjamin Franklin the charger way. And and it's three things that they say every single day in our opening ceremonies. You know, number one is be strong and rejoice in a challenge. Number two is to yield not to misfortune, but advance all the more boldly against it. And charger way three is to act honorably and with integrity in all situations. And our students all know that. They recite it every single day. And we have virtues of the month that we talk about at Benjamin Franklin. And I'm actually one of the presenters. I present every quarter on one of the virtues. We have quotes of the week, and we truly live those out. But I think one of the greatest things that our coaches give our players is their time and their attention. And we don't miss. I think that's one of the coolest things about our coaching staff and even our players. I I love summertime because it gives me an opportunity to connect with other coaches. You know, we'll go out, we'll get lunch and things like that. And they'll talk, oh man, 30 guys were missing today, or this many guys, and we only have this many coaches that are going to camp. We don't have that problem. Our players don't miss. And if they do miss, it's for valid reasons. It's a church camp, which will never hold against a kid, of course. It's a family vacation that's been planned for two years. And our coaches make it a priority to be at every practice. Our coaches make it a priority. We have so many young men who play multiple sports. They go to those other sporting events, they make themselves known. We not only do we have a ton of multiple sport athletes, we have multi-talented athletes. One of the top players in our program last year was first chair in the chamber orchestra. Just an incredible musician, one of the best piano players I've ever seen, plays the violin. He he's just an incredible human. And we we attend to those things. We go to the other games, we go to the other performances, we make ourselves seen. And we do it because we do love him. We, we, we, we sacrifice time with our own family to go to those things. Our our defensive coordinator, his daughter, who's an eighth grader now, I believe, is his clipboard girl on Friday nights. That's awesome. And, you know, it finds ways for his his children to be around the program so that he can be around the program as much as he can. Our offensive coordinator has four young, you know, children and two go to a different one, just graduated and one goes to a different high school, but he doesn't miss. He makes it a priority to be at his his daughter's athletics and activities, but then he rushes over in work clothes most of the time to coach. You know, he he's wearing his khaki pants and his polo shirt to call the offense. And I think it's that time, it's that appreciation of the work that they do because it's so easy to say go, go, go, go, go. But when your coaches aren't rowing the boat or whatever, you know, term you want to use, when they're not in the same situations, the same standards of being on time, putting forth the effort, being in the weight room when the players are in the weight room, it kind of falls on deaf ears because players see it. Players, players want the effort from their coaches, just like coaches want the effort from their players. So we do a lot of those things. We we we make it a priority to be ingrained in our community and don't miss things, right? Senior nights, when it's basketball players that play football, we're at their senior night. We're at their senior night for wrestling, we're at their senior night for baseball. And and and we just we try to make it, we know we're the largest program on campus. We know that we have the most young men that play football than any other sport on campus. We want to use that to our advantage to uplift the other programs as well and to be present for them. And I think that's it for our players, right? We're present and and we we give them our best because we expect their best as well. Good.

SPEAKER_01 32:41

What you use the word intentional, which I love because I've I've started using that more and more. Um, because really that that's what it comes down to. Everything that we do in life, you you need to be intentional about it. Um connecting and showing the kids love like you guys do. I mean, there has to be an an intentionality. You can't just assume, you know, the four agreements. You know, one of the agreements is don't assume. And um so you know, in that I think translates into transparency. Um being fully and and completely transparent with your kids and and incorporating that transparency. So then they're I mean, sure, as adults and as a leader, I mean, you're not gonna go in and share stories about your family life or you know, necessarily, but you have to nowadays we have to be able to relate in order for them to know that we love them and in order to to know that in order to connect with them. Um how many kids do you have now? You have two? In our football I have three kids. So we have twin boys.

SPEAKER_00 33:47

We have three kids. Yes. So we have twin boys who are four and our daughter is two.

SPEAKER_01 33:54

Good. Okay, now let me ask you this because I think it's important. How does being a father, how has how does being a father and becoming a father impact you in the way that you coach, in the way you interact with with your athletes?

SPEAKER_00 34:13

That's a great question because going back to the word intentional, you can't sometimes be a good dad. You can't sometimes be a good husband. You don't just luck into loving your wife well. You have to be intentional with those things. And I guess when I look at my boys and I look at our daughter, you know, our boys are four and and they're gonna be going to kindergarten not this school year, but next school year, they're so much more receptive now to words. And you don't know the power of your words until you mess up with a four-year-old, you know, until you lose your temper with a four-year-old. And I heard one time from our D, our defensive coordinator, who I think heard this from a coach at Hamilton or or or somewhere, you know, if you imagined every player in our program had the letters MMFI on their forehead, how would you speak to them? And MMFI stands for make me feel important. And I do that with my my children all the time. And and I wish I could say that was my idea of the MMFI, but it wasn't. But I've thought about it every day since I was told that. Because when I'm speaking to a player, I'm imagining as though I'm speaking to my four-year-old and I know the value of my words. And not that I dumb down my words by any means, because again, our our young men are super intelligent. They can handle hard truths, but those hard truths need to be delivered in a way that they know it's coming from a heart of care, a heart of love, a heart of devotion, a heart of ambition, of passion. And passion is not aggressive at all times. And I think sometimes when you deliver a message with passion, it can come off as though you're being aggressive.

SPEAKER_01 35:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:55

And I think our players know, I think our players know my heart for them because I have been around them for four years now. They have seen me vulnerable. They've seen us at our best where we've won a ton of games. They've seen us at our worst when we lost the state championship. And in those moments, who are you as a man? And I think the most important message I've ever delivered as a head coach was that five minutes after the state championship game in 2025. Because you have to be a man in that moment. You have to understand that you were not the better team that night. And you did lose a game after going 13, you know, straight games where things went your way. The ball bounced your way, the, the, the, the decisions made, you know, were in your favor. And when you're standing in front of your group there, you've got to have an intentional posture where you're not hanging your head. I think one of the worst things coaches do is this, right? They throw their hands up, they do those things, they they place blame. You know, it's the blame, complain, defend, right? And I just don't believe in that. We're gonna own our actions. And being a dad has taught me how to own my actions greater than anything else. You know, and and especially starting with twins. You know, starting with twins was so, you know, people would say, Oh, you must have had your hands full. We didn't know any different, my wife and I. Twins was just being parents to us. We didn't know. We didn't know what it was like to have one, you know. So for us, we just really understood that every move we make is being watched. Every move, every word we say to each other at the dinner table, or whether we think we're alone and we're in private, my wife and I. And the next morning we hear our boys repeating what we were saying, it's like, oh man, we got to be a little bit smarter. And then know that they're always around and they're sponges and they want to be led, they want to be disciplined, they want all those things, but you have to do it from a heart where your posture is kind, it's more gentle, it's appropriate in the setting that you're in. You know, I'm not gonna get on our boys like we would get on them at a football field. You know, but our boys are getting to that age where they're gonna be at the at the field a lot more. They're there every Friday night. They they, you know, they have the little corner in the end zone. And one of the things that I've been told from our community and our players is, you know, before every game, I run down to the corner of the end zone, I hug my wife, I kiss my guy, and I kiss my family. I tell them I love them. And then they don't care if we win or lose. You know, but I think our players need to see that. You know, our players need to see what it looks like to be a present husband and a present father in an industry where the time I spend with my family is far less than what I spend with our players. But I don't think the time equity is as valuable as being present when you're there. When you're at home, you're at home. And I think that's something that I've really truly learned as they've grown because they do take a lot of time and effort. And and if I want our players to see a loving husband and a loving father, I better be one. I better not just talk about it. And they need to see me doing it. But yeah, I mean, talking to our young kids, man, talking to our four-year-olds and our our two-year-old daughter is it's a blessing every single day to see them growing and learning something new. Uh, but we're my wife and I are learning every day as well. You know, we're we're not perfect by any means. And and and one of those cool things is we read the Bible every night, and I tell this story a ton, whether I'm in Bible studies or or things of that nature. And we'll drive in the car one day, and you know, Casen and one of our boys goes, Daddy, there's God. I said, Wait, what? You know, and I'm like looking around, like, where's God? And he goes, He's in the trees, he's in the clouds, he's in the sky. And I'm like, man, when we read the Bible to him, oh brother, when we read the Bible to them, everything is a hundred percent true. Yeah. There's no folklore with them. And that has been more, man, it it's been more I don't even know how to put it into words, but it's just been such a blessing to have these young kids and to be able to be in the position I am at Benjamin Franklin for them to see that as well. Yeah, it's been uh it's been a fun life so far.

unknown 40:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:23

Have you um you probably have, but have you ever read the four agreements?

SPEAKER_00 40:29

I have not actually, and I'm a big reader, so I'm gonna put that on my list.

SPEAKER_01 40:32

Yeah, put it on your list because I just I read it about a month and a half ago, and and up until you know the last couple years, I wasn't a big reader. But the first agreement is be impeccable with your word. And so when I first saw the title of the first agreement, I'm thinking, okay, I know what this is about. I had no idea. Not it, it doesn't dive into so I mean it does focus on what you say, but it's more importantly than that, it's how the words you let in, the words you hear on the TV from other people, who you surround yourself with, if they are negative, um it's gonna affect your word as well. It's not just doing what you say, it's what you let in and how all of that affects your actions and and even you know your beliefs. So it's it's a quick read, Danny, but it's so powerful. It's it's really good. I think your wife will like it too.

SPEAKER_00 41:34

So um Yeah, we're gonna we're gonna get into that. And I the your the words are so powerful. Marcus Aurelius said, if it is not right, do not do it. If it is not true, do not say it. And and you're so right. When it comes to media and music, you know, we try to shelter our players from it, you know, but you can only do that for so long because they want to listen to what they want to listen to. Um, but we don't use foul language. We we have edited music, you know, music across the board. Our our coaches don't use foul language, our players don't use foul language. But you're so right. What you let into your heart is going to be put forth out of you as well. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:13

Well, hey, brother, I I can't tell you how how honored I am and truly I knew this is a direction I wanted to go with you because the respect and and and that I have for you, the admiration, um, you know, like I said, and I know none of us are perfect, perfect. We all make mistakes, we all, you know, may swerve here and there, but but to me, you've always been a group a man of great faith, a man of impeccable character. Um you know, your conviction is evident, and everything, you know, every time I've talked to you, every time I've seen you, every time I read something you post. Um, keep doing what you're doing, man, because this, I mean, you know, with with I just Mark Tucker just posted some on Twitter the other day about there were over 8,000 teachers that resigned. I'm sure you saw that too. But in the state of Arizona, then we we need more leaders, whether you're in the classroom, on the field, at home, you know, in the community, like you. So keep doing what you're doing. And if you ever need anything, reach out. I I'm excited to I'm gonna come to to one of your games. My my middle son's coaching a Mesa saw. But I I I definitely am gonna come by, you know, and Scott, and just so you know, I had lunch with Scott Hare last week, and um we were talking about the region, we were talking about the region, and he had nothing but great things to say about you in your program. You're doing it the right way, and I'm really, really proud of you, and you know, keep doing it, okay? By God's grace alone, coach. Thank you. Amen. Yeah, hey, hang on for just a second, okay? Okay, you got it.