Milk & Honeys
Milk & Honeys" is the perfect blend of raw industry insights and unfiltered realness. Like the ingredients that sweeten and smooth out a cup of tea, hosts Kayla Becker (TV host of 10 years) and Vanessa Curry (model and actress of 10 years) bring their own flavors to the conversation— Together, they spill the tea on what it really takes to live and thrive in LA’s entertainment scene.
So, grab a mug and sip on some Milk & Honeys—because we’re serving the tea with all the right ingredients.
Milk & Honeys
Episode 5: Super Bowl Stages to Spiritual Coaching: Jamie Lee Ruiz's Journey w/Kayla Becker and Vanessa Curry
What happens when life suddenly forces you to reinvent yourself? When Jamie Lee Ruiz stepped onto the Super Bowl stage with Jennifer Lopez in 2020, she had no idea it would mark both the pinnacle and conclusion of her professional dance career. Weeks later, as the world shut down, this accomplished dancer who had performed with Becky G, Tyga, Chris Brown, and Pitbull found herself facing an unexpected crossroads.
In this deeply moving conversation, Jamie takes us through the raw, vulnerable journey of her transformation. The pandemic stripped away the constant motion of her dancer lifestyle, leaving her alone with uncomfortable truths about her relationship with herself. "I had no choice but to look at it and sit with it," she reveals, describing the intense self-love bootcamp she created to heal her relationship with herself.
The magic of Jamie's story lies in how she turned crisis into opportunity. When her intuition whispered that she should help others through coaching, she took a terrifying leap of faith—creating a simple announcement about life coaching services and "throwing her phone across the room" after posting it. This brave act began a profound journey that led to her current work as an intuitive coach, where she guides others through manifestation and personal transformation.
Jamie breaks down her manifestation process with refreshing clarity: identifying true desires, recognizing limiting beliefs, questioning if those beliefs are "ultimate truths," creating new beliefs, taking inspired action, and practicing gratitude throughout. "If I can live in a state of gratitude," she explains, "the universe is always matching me going, 'She's so grateful for what she has. Let me give her more to be grateful for.'"
What makes Jamie's approach unique is how she's integrated her dance background with her spiritual work. Rather than abandoning her past identity, she's embraced it, creating offerings like "Sacral Sundays"—spiritual dance classes for beginners focused on embodiment. "A lot of manifestation is about embodiment," she shares. "If you can't feel good and confident in this body, that is who you're being and that is what you're attracting."
Whether you're facing your own reinvention, struggling with limiting beliefs, or simply curious about manifestation, Jamie's journey offers profound wisdom about listening to your intuition even when logic says otherwise. Connect with her on Instagram @JamesLee4 or visit jamieleeruiz.com to learn more about her coaching and courses.
welcome back everyone to milk and honeys. We're your host, kayla becker, and I'm sitting next to the lovely vanessa curry. I do that every week, right, I kind?
Speaker 2:of tease if I'm going to say it, or if you're going to say it and I was waiting for you to say it, but I'm going to say it. Vanessa Curry, hi.
Speaker 1:Well, we have another guest in the studio today, someone that you've known for quite some time, a good friend of yours, someone I'm getting to know.
Speaker 2:We are diving into a very inspirational conversation with the multifaceted inspirational conversation with the multifaceted Jamie Lee Ruiz today, and you have you know a long.
Speaker 1:you've done a lot in your career. You've danced alongside artists like Becky G Tyga, chris Brown, christina Aguilera, pitbull, and then, I believe, you hit the Super Bowl stage with JLo. Back in what? 2020? Yes, I did. That's wild.
Speaker 2:And now she is taking a powerful pivot into becoming an intuitive life coach and she is manifesting with big magic, big love. You're just so inspirational and I'm so excited to welcome Jamie Lee Roos to the pod everyone.
Speaker 3:Hi guys, thanks for having me. I'm so excited to be here. I love that you guys are doing this and I'm just so happy to be a part of it. Thank you, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2:I'm so excited to be here. I love that you guys are doing this, and I'm just so happy to be a part of it.
Speaker 1:Thank you, thanks for being here. Well, yeah, we like to bring people on who can be inspiring, and that's kind of the point of this entire show is to bring, I guess, experts in their fields to kind of open up the reality of what it is that you do, and I want to hear a little bit about y'all's story, though, and how y'all became friends.
Speaker 2:I think it was back in 2009 we met. I think that was the year that we met.
Speaker 3:I'm really bad with time, but if you say 2009, then I'm going to go with that. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And Jamie and I. We met because we were doing Pussycat Dolls.
Speaker 2:They were redoing the group, and her and I were chosen to be a part of that new group and I'll never forget she was waiting on the sidewalk. We were like going to our first fitting and there she was, and she was like you must be Vanessa and I was like you must be Jamie, cause we kind of knew each other's names but not each other and we just looked at each other, we took a deep breath and we were like all right, let's, let's go do this.
Speaker 3:I guess you know it's like random new adventure that we were becoming a part of, but also I think, like you said to me earlier today, that that's like a memorable moment for you and it is for me too, because I feel like you're a super close friend of mine and a super special friend and like that moment I think we knew that we were going to be really good friends and just like meeting on the sidewalk outside on like La Cienega yep, oh yes, I remember, right in front of uh, agent provocateur I think is where it was exactly I was having this dance pass, though, jamie, like what's like the origin story, I guess we can say, of you know, of my dance background, dance background sure I have been.
Speaker 3:I always say I've been dancing since I came out the womb, literally like three years old.
Speaker 3:My mom put me in uh tap, jazz, gymnastics, acro ballet, all the things, um, and I just always loved it. Um, I did gymnastics as well, um, and so actually when I was seven I was doing both dance and gymnastics. My mom told me that I had to pick one, because they were both too expensive. So I picked gymnastics that I hadn't been doing for a long time, but I always missed dance.
Speaker 3:So when it came time for high school, I auditioned to go to performing arts high school so that I could dance at school, so that my mom wouldn't have to like pay for two things. So then that brought dance back around, and so I danced two hours every day in school for the performing arts program and then I danced an hour every day after school for dance team. Then I went into gymnastics for like three and a half hours after that. I was just doing the most. But after high school I auditioned to be a Miami Heat dancer, because I'm from Miami born and raised. So I danced for the Miami Heat for five years and then from there I made my journey to LA.
Speaker 1:What do you think gave you that work ethic, especially starting so young and wanting to balance dance and gymnastics, which one individually is a huge undertaking on its own. What do you think you got picked that up from?
Speaker 3:You know that's a good question. I think it's just like when it's all you know. It's like it's all you know and all you want to do, and I guess I can thank my parents for that, for putting me in so many sports and so many different things at such a young age. I didn't really have a desire to hang out with friends and do regular kid things because I was like I'm going to dance, I'm going to gymnastics and I loved it so much that I didn't really want to be anywhere else.
Speaker 3:It wasn't until high school that I was like boys.
Speaker 2:Where have y'all been this whole time. I'm like drinking, like what is this?
Speaker 3:I was like fuck this, I'm going to do that.
Speaker 1:That's why I kept you out of trouble for a little bit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean look at the end of the day too. When you moved here I mean I know this is like kind of like fast forward you had such a beautiful dance journey and in 2020, you know was like I know how much of a memorable moment this was for you to perform with JLo at Super Bowl 2020. And wasn't it?
Speaker 1:in Miami, yes, and I love saying the fact that I just met you, like recently, that I can say oh my God, then I definitely have seen you perform. And then I have people who can say, oh my God, we all.
Speaker 3:That was one of the most iconic performances in super bowl history yes, people say that, they do say that and they're like I watched you, I watched that performance and how does that so?
Speaker 2:I, I know you. You started your intuitive coaching. You know a little bit after that, but that is something do you ever think about? That you did manifest, that even before you were a manifestation, uh, you know professional, you know what. I mean, like, how does that feel? Like, how did you feel when you were in that moment? What was it like being on stage? Do you even remember it? Because sometimes I feel like we're on stage or you know, you're live television and I'm like how did it go?
Speaker 2:did, I do okay because I don't remember, but I think I did good, you know. So what was that?
Speaker 3:Actually, that whole experience was like I would say honestly, it was like the peak of my dance career, interestingly enough, because right after that COVID happened and that was the end of my dance career.
Speaker 3:But it was like the peak of my dance career, the highlight of my dance career. I even remember being like afterwards, when the world shut down, I was like, honestly, I went out with a bang, like yeah, I couldn't ask for a better way to go out, but it was just like everything I had been manifesting to perform with J-Lo, who's like the Latina queen. You know what I mean? I'm Latina, I'm from Miami, it was in Miami. It just felt like so in alignment and I absolutely manifested that situation. I had been wanting to dance for JLo for a really long time. I had been wanting to dance in the Super Bowl for a really long time. I think, as a professional dancer, super Bowl is your like. It's like your bucket top notch.
Speaker 3:It's like Super Bowl as a football player is also Super Bowl as a dancer yep. So yeah, um, I was really present. Through that. I also was like not my full healed self for sure. So there was a lot of like partying and drinking throughout that time as well, which makes it a little blurry, but I was present in the sense that I was like I was really aware of how amazing it was and how special it was and how grateful I was to be there. When that doesn't happen on all jobs, it's right. It happens in hindsight a lot where you're like, oh my God, I wish I would have been more present.
Speaker 3:But I have no regrets because I was in it.
Speaker 1:I was so in it. What was that call like when you found out that you were going to have that opportunity? Like walk me through that.
Speaker 3:So the choreographer for that performance was Paris Global. Who's like iconic?
Speaker 2:choreographer. And just to bring this full circle really quick now that I'm a life coach, paris global is one of my clients. Wow, which is amazing.
Speaker 3:I have chills at the full circle of that right now, the synergy of it all?
Speaker 3:yeah, but she is also like a bucket list for professional dancers. Like you want to work for paris global? She's like iconic choreographer and I had worked with her once years back when I was dancing on tour with pit bull. We brought her in as a guest choreographer to choreograph one of the numbers, um, but she had never hired me. She came in. We hired her, you know. So after that I was like Ooh, like I hope she hires me for something. And she did. She ended up hiring me for the Yummy music video Justin Bieber. Yummy, I don't know if you remember the video Iconic.
Speaker 3:But we all had pink hair in the video.
Speaker 2:I remember I dyed my hair pink for this.
Speaker 3:I was like Paris. Global wants me to dye my hair pink.
Speaker 1:Yes, Say yes, done.
Speaker 3:I had been blonde my whole life and I felt insane. But, I was like we're doing this Also.
Speaker 1:Can I curse here? Yeah, I can beep it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I need to. But yeah, I've been beeping my own cell phone, so you're fine, I love to curse, it's my favorite.
Speaker 2:What's your favorite cuss word?
Speaker 1:Okay, I knew that.
Speaker 2:I love that. We all have the same same I.
Speaker 3:It's like orgasmic literally it is to throw a couple f-bombs. I just love it. I feel like you're good healing and everyone should do it. Yep, anywho. Um, so she hired me for that video and I was like, oh my god, like I manifested at paris global, whatever there was also like I felt like 100 girls on that job still I don't care, my foot was in the door.
Speaker 3:And then I remember there was a lot of chatter on that job in rehearsals and on set, of being like oh, pierce is doing super bowl for j-lo, like I'm doing it. Did you get the call? Did you get put on hold? Did you get asked?
Speaker 3:and I was like no, but I kept hearing every day someone new would come in and be like I got asked I got asked and I was like I'm like god, please, like if there was ever something you know, then you're also on the job, like trying to be the best freaking dancer, because she's watching you and she's booking dancers for the super bowl, um, and I remember that like the whole job went by and I didn't get asked, but like the job was over and then I got an email and I got asked and I was like, okay, but I just got asked my availability, I didn't get booked and I'm just saying okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, we're almost there we get it.
Speaker 1:We're in a little bit.
Speaker 3:Then I started people hearing people getting booked. Friends were telling me like I'm booked, I'm going to miami this day and I'm like I'm not booked. The job started, people went to miami and started the rehearsal process and I still, at this point, you thought I didn't get it. But I didn't get released and I didn't get booked. I'm just like waiting, because sometimes you don't get released, yeah, usually I just didn't know.
Speaker 3:But I was holding on to that manifestation and that vision of me doing this. I was like I just felt it in my bones that it was for me and that it was going to happen, regardless of, like what was happening externally, and I just kept holding the vision, holding the vision. And then it was like Christmas break. They were like, hey, we need to add two girls. Like are you still available? I have chills right now. I'm like, yes, absolutely. When do I fly out? Like sign me up, my bag is already packed. And so, yes, I manifested that and you asked what the feeling was of that process. It was like nerve-wracking but like exciting. And I think that that's manifestation in general is like nerve wracking, like is it going to happen, and then you have to shift into this excitement of like it is going to happen, and I'm going to be excited because I just know and believe that it's coming for me, and that's the energy that I was in and I think that that's why I attracted it to myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I'm so glad that that happened for you.
Speaker 1:Like you said right before the world shut down and you were able to experience something that was probably at the tip top of your bucket list, um, and so I was going to ask what the internal signs you? You know that you felt knowing it was time to make the change, but I think the world did help you to make that decision. Um, but even when that did happen and you know you thought that maybe dance is about to move into the rear view, rear view mirror. How are you feeling processing all that, knowing that your life's going to take this drastic change away from anything else that you've done?
Speaker 3:Yeah, this is the story. This is like a story. But so, as the world is shutting down and everyone's like what are you going to do? What are you doing? What's the plan? I literally, like, gave up my apartment, I put things in storage and I was like, oh, let's go back a second. After the Superbowl, I was on a high. I actually booked my second dream job, which was to dance for major laser.
Speaker 1:I don't know, if you know who they are, but Diplo and two other guys are like a group in dancer world.
Speaker 3:As a female dancer, like the dancers for major laser, are called the laser gals and they are like the epitome you want to be a laser gal, everyone wants to be a laser gal and I? Another thing that I was manifesting, but I didn't think that it was going to happen for me, because I was always blonde and there was already a blonde on there, but then I had pink hair because of the music video and put it out of my head.
Speaker 3:But as soon as super bowl is over I'm on this high. I get an email like are you available to come to back to la and audition for major laser a private audition. I'm like university. You're really giving it to me. 2020 is really something.
Speaker 2:2020 is my year 2020 is my year.
Speaker 3:You can't tell me nothing like j-bo and major laser.
Speaker 3:This is crazy. So I go back to la, I audition, I book it. I'm like, wow, I manifested this too and I'm like it's the pink hair. The pink hair opened the door for me to get in there. Whatever I book it, we do a whole week's worth of rehearsals to learn the show and we have dates booked through the entire year. Mind you, this is like what? Uh, february, superbowl is in february and we have dates booked through the whole year, like tomorrowland, like all these festivals around the world like ultra and miami and I'm just like this is gonna be the most lit year of my life.
Speaker 3:I'm on the high of all highs. And right after we learned the whole show, the pandemic happened and little by little we started getting emails like this show is canceled, this show is canceled, this show is canceled, this one's still on hold, don't worry. Blah, blah, blah, whatever. So, ironically enough, our first show for Major Lazer was supposed to be Ultra in Miami. So I had a flight to go to Miami. So when the world starts shutting down and all the shows get canceled, I literally was like leases up, putting my stuff in storage, getting out of here, and I was like can you not cancel my flight to Miami?
Speaker 2:I'm going to.
Speaker 3:Miami. They were like sure you can have the flight. I go to Miami, I stay with my sister and my brother-in-law in my sister's home. Um, they spare bedroom, so I have like my own room there and I'm just like, okay, cool, like two weeks, how fun, you know? Oh, my gosh, two weeks, could you imagine? We're drinking up a storm. We're having zoom happy hours yeah, friends, we were.
Speaker 2:We were doing like videos of everyone, where everyone was like in a box yeah, like you look up and then you look to the right.
Speaker 3:We're just all having wine and all each other makeup brush, yes, videos, all of that we're doing, all of that. It's the best time ever. And then two weeks turns into three, turns into a month, turns into okay, like this is going to be longer than we thought and I'll basically give it to you. Like this, I now am realizing that I have nowhere to go, nothing to do, and I'm forced to literally just sit with myself and my feelings and like the uncomfortable truths of myself that I had like been so distracted from before. Like my whole life was like dance, tour, show, travel with all these artists, and now I'm like sitting in one place and everything that I had like suppressed was like flooding to the surface.
Speaker 3:I say it all the time, but I'm like it was like like I could throw up with the discomfort that I was feeling of like the truths of what I felt about myself, and I had no choice but to like look at it and sit with it. And so I put myself through what I like to call a self-love bootcamp, because I realized like, ooh, all these feelings are literally telling me that I don't love myself or that I don't have a healthy relationship with myself, and I'm thinking all these terrible things in myself. I have nothing to do but sit with it, look at it, feel it, accept it, love it, and I had a life coach at that time. I had recently hired a life coach and she was helping me through this process and she told me to get this book called mirror work and it's about literally looking in the mirror and like learning to like yourself, learning to love yourself, sitting with the discomfort and just like owning it instead of like shying away from it, and that is really hard, by the way.
Speaker 2:So hard I got that book after she got it, and to look at yourself in the mirror and talk to yourself and you have to be honest, like actually honest, actually honest, not fake honest.
Speaker 3:No, that's what I was learning in that I was realizing that, like all the hair and makeup and show and performance and being the hot girl on the jobs, like that was my fake confidence my whole life I didn't have to ever create real, true confidence of knowing myself because all of that was always there and that was all gone. Like my pink hair was now grown out to here I my extensions like can't gone, Like no need to put on makeup, it's just me at my core and I'm like cringe uncomfortable. And so I put myself through self-boot camp, learned to love myself and it wasn't just like a oh cool, done, we love ourselves, it's to this day.
Speaker 2:I'm still doing it.
Speaker 3:But I call it a boot camp because I really like that's all I did for like a month, that when I came out of that I was like whoa, this is crazy. I'm really learning to love myself and I can only imagine how many people out there are feeling the same thing, right. And so, in the midst of like, where's my dance career? Where's the next dollar coming from? What is life? What is the life I've always known? And also like learning a new version of myself and a new relationship with myself that I've never had.
Speaker 1:And like you're just having like your new identity this identity that you've had since you were a child, which you are a dancer. And now you have to figure out like, yeah, who am I? Who am I?
Speaker 3:without dance. Yeah, to figure out like yeah, who am I? Who am I without dance? Yeah, and and there's like this, really like void area, when it's like you're releasing your old self but you're not your new self yet you're like I'm no one, I'm nothing I'm what I'm floating?
Speaker 1:I'm blowing in the wind you got through your boot camp, you started realizing okay, there's more to life than who I was. I have so much more. What were you seeing in yourself that gave you hope that you could find this next?
Speaker 3:Yeah, so previous to that, I think, like in the year or two or a couple of years before that, my dad had passed away and so that had. It's okay, thank you. That had sparked something in me already to start searching and discovering and like finding mindfulness and finding spirituality and finding peace with loss and grief and all of that. So that had already led me on my like personal development journey and spiritual, spiritual journey. But again like, because I was so distracted with like you know that like lady gaga mean that's like bus tour other show next.
Speaker 3:That was my life. It's the fast pace, literally that I was healing, but I was healing as much as I could with, like you do a show, then after the show you go out and you drink and then you go home. You sleep two hours, you get up, you go on an airplane, you go to the next show, you take a nap, you do the show, you get home. You have three days off. All you want to do is sleep, laundry, pack, repeat.
Speaker 3:It's like how much was I actually sitting with myself? So I was like on the journey, but like surface level, I guess you could say, because I didn't have this time and space to really do it. And so I knew for a while that I liked this like personal development world, and I liked the spirituality aspect of things and I liked healing and I liked that. And I knew I would always say to myself like this is cool, like this is something I could do after dance, you know. And then I had gotten the life coach and I was like that's cool what she's doing that, like that's so cool what she's doing for me, like I could see myself doing that one day, now that I know what it looks like and that there's a job for that you know. But again, I always thought it was like after dance.
Speaker 1:After dance it felt very, very very far away, yeah, yeah, who knew at that point when after dance would be? It could have gone another 20 years, and so you were forced in to this new phase of your life, and clearly you have embraced it to the fullest. You seem very happy and excited about this phase of your life. I would assume you would define success very differently now. I would assume you would define success very differently now, though, than you did then. To success then Major Lazer, j-lo, pitbull, yep, now helping other people you know discover their, their true purpose.
Speaker 3:Totally. And not only that, but like. Success to me is like I think my accolades before were like Super Bowl with J-Lo. Chris Brown music video, Justin Bieber music video dancing on tour with Pitbull dancing for Becky G Like those are my accolades. My accolades now are like learning to love myself, healing from insecurities, setting boundaries in relationships. Like that is success to me, like beyond any dance accolades, success that anybody can.
Speaker 2:Yeah point out for me. I know that you live in a space that is very, very sentimental to you and like that's very important to you, and I know you've moved a couple times to find that space and I feel like now you're home you can see it, how comfortable you are in that space and I know that that's also like a huge success for you. You plan to putting your TV on your wall.
Speaker 1:You know like she's like she's, like I'd never done by yourself no no, no.
Speaker 3:I paid for someone to come put my TV on my wall but, like I had always been the girl that was like puts it on the thing, yeah, you know. And it just like puts it on the thing, yeah, you know. And I felt like this is very big girl of me in this big girl home. I'm like success, yeah, like I love myself, I love who I'm becoming, I love my life, I love my, the power that I, that I feel in creating my life. Um, I love that I'm able to help other people. Feel that way, I love the possibilities that are an option for me, like that is success to me. And not to say that the dance things are not.
Speaker 3:For sure, but it's just success looks different now. You know what I mean, absolutely.
Speaker 1:When did you feel like when did you know that this was like?
Speaker 3:your calling. So in that time pandemic time and I'm putting myself through self-love bootcamp dance is non-existent.
Speaker 3:I literally had that moment where I was like I know I had been saying that like the spiritual life coaching thing was after dance, but I think after dance is literally today it was like I felt like my back was against the wall and I was looking around and I was like after dance is right, oh my god, I didn't think it was going to come this fast and it did. And so I was really practicing my intuition at that time and just like listening to, like the divine downloads that I was getting, and listening to what my soul was telling me, my heart was telling me, my body was telling me, and it was just a very clear message, like everything you've just put yourself through yourself, the bootcamp, everything that your life coach has helped you with, all these things you need to go help people do that.
Speaker 2:And I was like absolutely not. What do you mean?
Speaker 3:I've just I'm just tapping into this and it was like no, this is what you need to do. So I just I followed. I took inspired action on that very scary, non-logical step that was being presented to me, and I'll never forget it. I made like a little Canva flyer. I don't even know if it was on Canva, to be honest, it could have been just straight on Instagram yeah, yeah, yeah, and I was like whatever it takes.
Speaker 3:I was like now offering one-on-one life coaching sessions If you want help with any of these things. I said like mindset, manifestation, self-love, intuition, personal power, whatever. Who knows what I put on there. I was like DM me, I posted it, I threw my phone across the room and I was like what have I done?
Speaker 2:Was that, do you think the hardest part about letting go of Jamie the dancer? Right, like, like you were, you were known. That's it. Like Jamie, you are a dancer, this is it. She's done everything that she's wanted to do. And now you're back up against the wall and you're like, oh okay, I have to just put it out, and I'm sure if you look at it right now, you'd be like what the actual was that?
Speaker 2:You know, but edit right now. You'd be like what the actual was that you know, but god, there's so much editing this episode.
Speaker 1:I'm just kidding, I'm sorry, I'm sorry what the actual?
Speaker 3:okay, keep going, just a bunch of beeps. People are like what did you actually say in that episode?
Speaker 2:all I heard was sorry, guys, sorry sorry guys, but yeah, like would you say like what was the hardest part for you? Because what, or was that the hardest part? Like to start to put that flyer out there and you chuck your phone across the room and you're like this is no, take backs.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that was scary for many reasons, because I was following my intuition instead of my logical mind, which I had done my whole life. You know, and now I know that logic limits you, you know it's, you think this is what you're supposed to do, because you've been told this is the right thing, blah, blah, blah, whatever. And it's like intuition is always guiding you to your best and highest self. So, even if it doesn't make sense, like even if my desires don't make sense, and what?
Speaker 3:I want for my life. It doesn't matter, it's there for a reason. Same way action step was gifted to me for a reason. I just knew that I had to do it. There was, it was like I couldn't not do it. I had to do it, as scary as it was, so I did it. But then the next scary step was like what are people going to think of me? Are they going to take me serious? All they've really known me for is dance, but not only dance, but like shaking my ass.
Speaker 1:Yep, dance, which we love twerking, dance like with my ass out, but then people have people have their certain opinions and judgmental like yeah, like how you've had your ass out, how I should be listening to you. How can you help me change my life?
Speaker 3:all you do is shake your ass on instagram and on stages. It's like, who are you to tell me how to heal myself, how to change my life? And so I had to grapple with that own identity of myself and finding, at first I felt like I had to remove that identity, become this light life coach. And then it was like no, that is me and that is what led me here and I had. I think now I'm a physical manifestation of the integration of both of those. And absolutely the real amazing like turning part was when, like, I had a client that hired me and was like you know, someone asked me what I was doing. Later, this is my client. And I told them, like, oh, I have life coaching session. They're like, oh, like, what's that? Like? How is that different than therapy? And she was like does your therapist dance and twerk her ass on stage with taiga major laser? She's like that's why I'm here. And I was like whoa, yep, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Speaker 2:I have chills because it's just like every version of you like leads to the version of you that you're supposed to be, absolutely was that the moment that you got off that call and you're like, oh, this is what I'm supposed to be doing and this whole journey of my dance career has brought me here, because you do a lot of manifestation and life coaching for people in the dance industry and help navigate that, because the dance industry is hard, man.
Speaker 3:I mean this whole industry is hard, right, but it's like the dance industry it's like it's very close-knit, it's very small, um, and there's a lot to navigate you probably get pigeonholed into, like you said, being the dancer who's on the stage shaking their ass and so to be able to cross over to something like this, that, yeah, you know people look at you and rely on you for for guidance, I can imagine that's very hard it's very hard and I it took me a long time to notice it, but there was a moment where I looked back and I was like 90 of my clients are dancers or choreographers or in this industry or have been in the industry at some point in their lives. I was like whoa, I'm doing something here, like I'm being like the mindset manifestation healing coach that I wish I would have had when I was in the industry. That would help me navigate that aspect of it and that was really, I'll say, freaking cool.
Speaker 1:So you don't have to believe me, I'm still going to put a beep over it. It's a good thing, I think. For the rest of the episode, I do want to maybe get, like you know, maybe we'll get some free professional, you know, guidance from you.
Speaker 3:Like you want me to teach you how to twerk.
Speaker 1:Yes, that will be on our Patreon.
Speaker 2:that will be on our Patreon, we'll have another site that you can go to and we'll be shaking and twerking.
Speaker 1:I am half black, okay, and I have the lower half of my body, that should be, able to move.
Speaker 2:I cannot twerk, I cannot shake it.
Speaker 1:Maybe y'all can teach me. On another. You talk about manifestation quite a bit. What does that practice look like? We've heard about how it had worked in your personal life, but when you are talking to someone who needs help on manifestation, what does that look like in your coaching? Do you want?
Speaker 3:me to give you like the steps. Sure, like my steps, because here's the thing I do like logic and I'm a Virgo and I'm a Virgo Taurus, taurus, so I'm very earth grounded, virgo and I'm a Virgo Taurus, taurus, so I'm very earth grounded, perfectionist. Need steps, rules, directions. I am very much that, but I also have like this intuitive, witchy, flowy side of me. So I love steps. You know what I mean and I think that I need that in manifestation. I can't just like visualize and like help and praise it comes to me like that doesn't work for me. I need, so I'm to give them to you guys, please do Okay.
Speaker 3:So step one is tuning in to your desire. What the f*** do you want? Like, what do you want? You know, and not just like what you think you want, what people have told you you've wanted, or like what's been presented as possible for you, but like, if you really tune into your heart, everybody has unique desires that have been placed in there by and I'm going to say, god, source, universe, whatever you believe to be true as a higher power for you has placed a desire in your heart. Like you came onto this earth with this like divine assignment, like a blueprint, navigation of what you're supposed to create and have in this lifetime. So if you can connect to what that is and connect to what that is, figure that out like truly, that's step one, right step two is going like okay, what thoughts do I have, what beliefs do I have around this desire that maybe are limiting me, or I call them limiting beliefs. Like what do I believe? Okay, when I think of my desire and what I want and that's so exciting the next thing is usually this like cringy, like, but I'll never have it because of X, y, z, or like I'm not good enough for that, or what will this person say? Or am I good? Like, am I worthy of having that? Whatever? Some of them are conscious and some of them are like super subconscious that we have to really work to get to.
Speaker 3:But if you could literally write all of those down of, like, what do you believe around having this desire, what do you believe to be true, and that could be good or that could be bad, and then asking yourself, right, like, looking at the limiting beliefs, like the things that tell you you can't have it, this is, like a really important step is asking yourself like is that limiting belief the ultimate truth Like? Is it written in a Bible and the stars in the sky? Did a wizard come down and condemn you and say that is your truth forever, can't have it, you'll never have it? Is it the ultimate truth? Is it like written in like the walls, with like hieroglyphics, with like a wood palette you know forever? Is this it? And the answer is always no. It's not the ultimate truth. It's just what you're believing, based on your past or based on what you've experienced, or what you've been taught, or trauma, or what your parents have taught you. You believe that to be true and you've given that truth so much momentum that that is your truth. Right, but it's not the ultimate truth. So there's power in that.
Speaker 3:If it's not the ultimate truth, then I get to decide what is true for me and I get to look at it and go okay, if you're not the ultimate truth, what do I want my truth to be?
Speaker 3:What do I want to believe instead? Right, what would feel so good to believe about my desire and what would make me like an energetic match for my desire? I like to say, like if you were someone that did have that desire, if you had already manifested it. What did you need to believe in order to have it? Or what do you believe about yourself, about that dream, about that goal, about the desire? What do you need to believe in order to attract it? Because law of attraction says like what you think, what you believe, who you be, is what you attract.
Speaker 3:So if I want to be a millionaire, but I believe that money is hard to come by and these are my beliefs around money right, it's hard to make money. Other people make money, but not me, and those are my beliefs Then I'm not an energetic match to be a millionaire. So I have to look at those and I have to go. Okay, that's not the ultimate truth, that's just. You know, I grew up with not a lot of money, so no wonder I wouldn't want to believe. Instead and this is also an important part, because you can't just go I'm going to believe that I'm a millionaire, that I am going to be a millionaire, that you know it's easy to be a millionaire. That sometimes feels too far away from where you're currently at. So you have to do these like baby steps of shifting your beliefs. So right now I feel broke as fuck.
Speaker 1:Just keep going.
Speaker 3:You guys just fuck. You know where you're at, you know I'm sorry, mom.
Speaker 3:Okay, my mom's shaking her head if you feel broke as fuck and you really believe that money is hard to come by. You can't switch and be like money is so easy to me. That's too far away for your nervous system to get around it, for you to believe it, for you to identify with. So you have to shift into like, okay, I'm willing to believe something different around money. How about that? Like, how about just a willing to believe something else? I'm willing to believe something different around money. I'm shifting into believing that money can be easy for me. You know, like these little, like bridge affirmations that baby step your way and you know, once you can believe that you're willing to believe something different and that feels good for you, then you can be like I'm starting to feel that money is easier to come by. Or, you know, I'm open to seeing how money easy, how easy money can be for me. I'm open to seeing that. Then you leave the possibility for, like, the universe to bring that to you.
Speaker 2:Anyways, you got to maybe step your way into these new beliefs and I know you speak a lot about gratitude in those steps because, remember, the steps are not easy. No, and we a lot of times want those steps to be easy and then, when they, when we find out that they're hard, we give up. Or or the consistency, like for me, I struggle with consistency in my own beliefs, but I know that you always talk about having that gratitude. Why do you think having gratitude is so important while you're making these steps, even if they're not? Yeah, maybe you make one step forward, but then, like, you go two steps back and you're like, how am I still? How do I still have gratitude, even though I'm like, I feel like I'm falling behind?
Speaker 3:So I'll say that because the universe is built on the law of attraction If the more gratitude you can have, the more you're a match for things to be grateful for. If I can live in a state of gratitude, the universe is always matching me going. She's so grateful for what she has. Let me give her more to be grateful for. If I can live in a state of gratitude, the universe is always matching me going. She's so grateful for what she has. Let me give her more to be grateful for. Let me give her more. But if you're ungrateful, you're like oh, I don't have enough, I don't have enough. The universe is going, oh, she doesn't have enough, let me give her more of, I don't have enough.
Speaker 3:So gratitude is super important, important even when you don't fully have your desires, because you need to create the sustainability of like being able to hold um, where you're at and what you're asking for. So I like to say, like you know, a person walking right it's like one foot down, one foot in the air. One foot down, one foot in the air. So you always want to have like the foot that's down is like the foot that's in gratitude for where you're at and what you have, even if it's not what you fully want you have. You have to be grateful for it, because this is where you're at and this present moment is the moment that gets you to the next one. So if you can't be grateful for it, you're not going to be grateful for the next thing. Right? So you have to have one foot in gratitude and the next foot that's stuck up to take the next step, that's the foot that's up in desire. So you have to it like duality. I have to have gratitude for where I'm at and what I have and and desire my next thing. And when that foot that's in desire gets that manifestation, you could plop that down into gratitude for it and your next foot can step up into the next desire.
Speaker 3:You don't have to be all like only gratitude from where I'm at and I don't need anything else, or like I only want, I only want, I only want F everything. Fuck everything that's here. I don't want it, I don't like it, it's trash, it's not good enough for me. Those, you have to figure out how to marry them. You have to figure out how to have both. I love the duality of the leg in the air and oh, yes and down. Well, think about if you had both feet down. You're not going anywhere, right? If you have both feet up, you're falling flat on your ass. So it's a constant going, with always being grounded in, in, in both. You know, yeah, um, sorry, do you want me to finish the steps?
Speaker 3:oh, my gosh, please no please, I'm like because, because we're going, it's just coming out of me, um, okay, where was I at? Um, what do I want to believe instead?
Speaker 2:what do I? What do?
Speaker 3:I. What do I want to believe instead? Yeah, so, so in the steps, it's like, if that's not my ultimate truth, what I want to believe, instead that's where you bring in these like affirmations, right, and so this is, this is.
Speaker 3:This is the hard part. I would say. This is the like daily deciding your new beliefs, because your old beliefs have a lot of momentum and a lot of power and a lot of you've chosen that day after day after day. I'm 39 now, so I've chosen my limiting beliefs for 39 years, so now I'm going to choose something different. That's like a baby. I have to really give it all my time, energy and attention If it's going to overpower the thing that I've been giving energy to for 39 years.
Speaker 3:So this is where people, I think, lose sight. They're like that's too hard, I can't seem to believe it. I can't seem to get myself to believe that. I can't seem to shift my thought. It's like you have to choose it every day, even when you don't feel like it's working. You have to keep feeding this new baby, you know.
Speaker 3:And with that comes then action. So like I think a huge part of manifestation is action that a lot of people don't realize. They're like I'm just going to visualize and be in receiving mode for it and I'm just going to lay around in my bikini all day, hoping and praying that the things fall in my lap, and it's like you have to listen to your intuition, same way I did during the pandemic to take that action that didn't feel fun to do but I had to do and you have to take this action. I'll pause, actually, and say meditation is huge for me because or journaling, because it gives me the space and the silence to hear what those action steps are that I should take, and not just like what I think, but like the silence, to really feel like what the best intuitive action step is.
Speaker 3:And then you have to take that action and you have to keep doing these steps over and over and over, and being a little delulue and living in the energy of like what I'm creating instead of what I can physically see in my reality. Cause the reality that you have right now you've already manifested. You've already manifested this based on your past thoughts and your actions and your past identity. I've already manifested this. So if I don't like what I see, I literally have to put blinders to this reality and like tune into the one I'm creating internally and let that eventually catch up and reflect to me outside. But if I'm constantly looking at evidence in my external world. I'm gonna continue to manifest this reality over and over and over, which is the hard part, but it's possible, it's hard, man, I know it is hard.
Speaker 1:I know you're talking to me. I'm like, I feel like you're talking to me because I'm going.
Speaker 2:She's like she's like trigger trigger. I'm trigger you guys with your fans right now yeah, we'll talk after the show.
Speaker 1:You know you doing, you know this, this work. That means you're also giving a lot of yourself to other people. You're spreading yourself very, very thin, in a positive way, but still very thin. So for yourself? How are you able to stay grounded while showing up for others every single day?
Speaker 3:a couple ways raise my prices and that's how we get that million, you know I heard that the more someone pays me, the more energy I can give that one person and the less I feel like I financially have to give myself to other people to pay bills you know what I mean and so it frees up a lot of my time and I can pour into those clients more so I appreciate how honest that response was. I that was great.
Speaker 2:It makes a lot of sense that and you spread yourself thinner. I mean, yeah, well, you, you can spread yourself, like in this business, like you're working for yourself, right? You can spread yourself as thin as you want exactly so you have control, but again, that is a manifestation that you made for yourself and and like my prices now are.
Speaker 3:I've had to work to these and yeah, and create beliefs around feeling worthy enough and valuable enough to charge this price. You guys, when I tell you what, when I threw that flyer out on my phone and tossed my phone in 2020, my price was $55 for a session, because that's all I felt worthy of and all I believed I deserved at the time. And when someone paid me $55, I was like oh my God, this is crazy. I immediately went to the calculator and was like how many sessions do I have to do in order to provide for myself? I was like 900. Okay, we quickly have to change back to draw. But not only that, like I had to start working on my identity to feel worthy of more, but also I was already burning myself out Right In the first week of doing sessions. I was like this is exhausting, you know. So that shifted and changed very quickly for me. Well, for those, listening.
Speaker 1:Who would like to if they can afford you what's the process? Like to be able to hire you as as a coach.
Speaker 3:Okay, so right now I you can hire me as a one-on-one coach. Uh, you can message me on Instagram or go to my website, which is, by the way, my website is wwwjamieleeruizcom. My Instagram is at James Lee for the number four. I love having conversations in my DMs, so please come talk to me, but I have other options besides one on one coaching. I have a lot of digital courses that you can purchase and like, do on your own self, self-paced self-study that are like I've done she's done them, I've done them all. They're very valuable. There's so much information and they're like I teach it to you. It's all in there. And then, every now and then, I will offer different like virtual things. So just follow me on Instagram to stay up to date. Sometimes I'll do like a virtual Reiki healing which she's come to and she loves. I just started to do Sacral Sundays, which is a almost like a spiritual dance class for beginners, for non-dancers um, where you have to go.
Speaker 1:Maybe I can do that. Oh my god, can you? She can, yes, can you guys come? Are you speaking for me?
Speaker 3:yes, I am okay, remember, we're finishing each other's sentences for beginners, like it is not for the dance industry also, although if somebody in the dance industry wants to come by all means, but it is for like the maybe the mom who's disconnected from her body, the new mom who's disconnected from her body, or like someone who really wants to dance but feels too scared and like there's not a dance class out there. That's truly for beginners. And there's like a spiritual component where we do like a little meditation at the beginning to release limiting beliefs that you have about even dancing and feeling sexy in your body and being in this room that we release before we even get to it and feeling comfortable being sexy, like just because you're a mom or just because you're 40 plus years old, like it doesn't you?
Speaker 2:can be as sexy as you want, at any age, and that's what I love about your class, because you can literally see how people feel when they're in there and they're not dancers back on yeah, and they're even just like touching your leg a certain way, like people don't do that. They don't know that feels weird to them.
Speaker 3:Yeah or they've been shamed their whole lives. And the truth, the real reason why I even wanted to do this is because a lot of manifestation is about embodiment. Right like you have this one body, this one vessel in this lifetime. That this body holds your mindset, it holds your soul, it holds your heart, it holds your emotions, it holds everything. So if you can't feel good and confident in this body, like that is who you're being and that is what you're attracting, so if you're uncomfortable walking through this world, the universe is is like she's uncomfortable, let me give her more to be uncomfortable about. Or she doesn't seem like she's an embodiment of confidence, she doesn't seem like she's an embodiment of a millionaire. So I'm not going to give that to her, you know. So like it's an embodiment practice Learning to feel good in your body and allowing those beliefs that you're creating to like ruminate through your entire body as you walk, as you stand, as you move, as you dance. All of it it's like super important in the process.
Speaker 3:So I've recently brought that as an offer as well I love that.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 1:Yes, I know I learned so much I'm gonna have to like go home and digest with a big glass of wine after this. She's going to be a spiritual girl, the after all I don't know, you may have got me there a little closer than I have been. Yeah, oh look, I opened the door. Okay, I opened the door. I told her.
Speaker 3:I'm like I am.
Speaker 1:She will just push you straight through it. I feel attacked in the best kind of way. But yes, thank you so much for coming on. I think we all learned a lot from you. It was very enlightening and I hope anyone who was listening and watching also took something from this as well. And hey, look her up, she said, slide into her.
Speaker 2:DMs. Not in a creepy way, though, guys, absolutely not, guys that is a wrap for this episode of Milk and Honeys.
Speaker 1:What's our tagline? Vanessa? You were so good at it last week.
Speaker 2:We are serving the tea with all the right ingredients.
Speaker 1:Boom. Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, follow us on our socials and we'll catch you on the next one.
Speaker 2:See you next time. Bye guys, bye, I don't know where to look. Anyway, bye.
