Milk & Honeys
Milk & Honeys" is the perfect blend of raw industry insights and unfiltered realness. Like the ingredients that sweeten and smooth out a cup of tea, hosts Kayla Becker (TV host of 10 years) and Vanessa Curry (model and actress of 10 years) bring their own flavors to the conversation— Together, they spill the tea on what it really takes to live and thrive in LA’s entertainment scene.
So, grab a mug and sip on some Milk & Honeys—because we’re serving the tea with all the right ingredients.
Milk & Honeys
Episode 16: From Catholic School to Code-Switching: Our Childhood Education Stories
Remember when the worst thing about going back to school was getting your lunch money stolen and not the fear of your embarrassing moment going viral? Vanessa and Kayla certainly do.
In this nostalgic episode, we're diving into our drastically different educational backgrounds - from Vanessa's strict Catholic school experience complete with nuns checking skirt lengths to Kayla's journey through multiple schools as a foster child navigating racial identity. We share how these formative years shaped who we are today, from developing code-switching abilities to overcoming the infamous "Catholic guilt."
The playground was our battlefield where Red Rover selections determined your social standing and dodgeball left both physical and emotional scars. We're talking about the real, face-to-face bullying of the 90s versus today's relentless cyberbullying - debating which generation had it worse while acknowledging each had unique challenges.
You'll laugh as we recount our detention stories (or "ASS" - After School Suspension, as Kayla's school called it), passing handwritten notes in class, and playing MASH to predict our futures. There's even a surprise Christian rap performance from Kayla that you absolutely won't want to miss!
For anyone who grew up in the 90s or early 2000s, this episode will transport you back to a simpler time before iPads replaced textbooks and when showing your personality meant colorful socks under your uniform. And for today's students? Consider this your anthropological study of how your parents survived school without smartphones.
Share your own school memories with us on social media @milkandhoneypod and let us know: would you rather face the physical bullies of yesteryear or navigate today's digital minefield?
Welcome back everyone to Milk and Honey's episode 16. We should have had 16 candles up in here. We should have, I know. But you know what? You know who has 16 candles? Typically our high school students, and we haven't been one of those in a long time, and we're about to get to it's mid-August, back to school, so we're going to be telling you a lot of our school stories, but beforehand, I'm Kayla Becker and this is, and I am Vanessa Curry, yes, so, wow, we, I think, have learned a lot about each other, about our school days. Yes, the playground where I spent most of my days Are we going to start singing Fresh Prince right now, rapping.
Speaker 1:Yes, favorite show ever. Oh yes, it's mid-August already. I still have school-age siblings. I know you have a niece who's like nine years old, yes, so everyone's getting ready to go back to school, which?
Speaker 2:when I was growing up. That was the most dreaded time for me, Same. The only thing I honestly liked about going back to school was getting new clothes.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, no, offense school.
Speaker 2:I love, I mean I. School is great. All the offense, we hated you school but I did not. I was not a fan of school. I mean what? I mean there are plenty kids. I mean my niece is a fan of school, she loves that, and so I'm like good for you and we're gonna get to.
Speaker 1:Maybe the wise behind that for sure but, like listen, we were in elementary school and it was an entirely different world. Kids these days had no idea what it was like growing up in school in the 90s and the early 2000s and the mid 2000s. Like you know, today's students are doing homework on iPads. No one's getting scoliosis from carrying heavy book bags anymore. You know, I know you're dealing with cyberbullying nowadays. Thank God we didn't, but we dealt with like actual bullies. Like you know, you watch the old school movies like Mean Girls and you know 16 Can or 13.
Speaker 2:Yeah, have you ever seen that movie Like 13 going on 30? No, 13. The movie 13. If you have not watched it, you need to go watch it.
Speaker 1:But like, bullying is like. Yes, and that's the thing we were bullied, like our lunch money actually got stolen. I got pushed against the lockers, there were fights in the playground and that was you know. That was what it was like back then, at least for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh yeah. No, I got into my fair share of situations we played dodgeball oh and then red rover, red rover, like do they still play that game? Talk about we are jumping into this. Yeah, quicker than I thought you want to talk about the game we played on the playground.
Speaker 1:That messed all of us up as adults and having identity crises and dealing with not being wanted. Why am I dismissive of one? I don't know. That was the last motherfucking person that they chose on red Rover. Red Rover, red Rover, let Kayla come over. Never heard that. It was like oh, game over.
Speaker 2:Game over Red Rover and Kayla's still standing there.
Speaker 1:I'm still here, and that's what I want you all to know. I'm still here, I'm still here. Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 2:That's a hot start. Yeah, obviously we are very triggered. We're gonna take a deep breath, just one.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm going to take a sip of my water. Yes, so that's what's in this cup? It's water.
Speaker 2:Ice water, okay, oh, so refreshing Back down.
Speaker 1:Okay, let's talk about you. We had very different school upbringings. You were and boys get your mind out of the gutter. She was a little catholic school girl yes, I sure was, I sure was everything. Oh yeah, that's so inappropriate. No, are you joking? I would get in trouble for did you double roll?
Speaker 2:yes, I would triple roll my skirt and then when we got, checked you know, by our teachers or yeah, like by our teachers or the nuns, like it'd have to be like a finger, your, your middle finger. It'd have to be like that length. Then we'd all roll them down. But yes, of course, I rolled my skirt like three times so that when I would bend over you'd see my shorts of course, obviously I wore shorts a little, uh like, yeah, yeah, little like booty shorts yeah, isn't it funny like and I want to get into this thing, but isn't it funny now Like kids go to school in crop tops?
Speaker 1:I feel like dress codes are kind of like out there. I mean you went to a Catholic school, but the public school system was just as strict, at least the one I went to.
Speaker 2:For sure.
Speaker 1:And it's funny. Now I see like my little niece go out.
Speaker 2:I'm like yeah, oh, I mean prom. I I see I see like girls going to prom and I I mean I love their fits. But I'm also questioning would have been allowed how are we allowing people to wear?
Speaker 2:some of these things and a slit up to your hoo-ha. Yeah, and like girls these days, I mean, I swear like when we were 18, 17, 18 like nobody, even if we had cleavage which neither one of us did but it's like even if we had cleavage, we weren't allowed to show it, like there was definitely guidelines of what we were allowed to wear and now I feel like it's kind of a free-for-all and I'm like good for them, I love that.
Speaker 1:But there's these girls on tikt TikTok who are like flaunting their prom dresses. I'm assuming it's like a college formal or something based on the way they're dressed, uh-huh.
Speaker 1:All right, well, okay, so you talk about what it was like. I don't really have. I went to like one Catholic mass my entire life with my friend and it was the most stressful thing I've ever done, with all the standing and sitting and, like you know but like I don't think I have any friends that I can talk to that went to like a Catholic school taught by nuns. What was that like?
Speaker 2:It was well. Here's the thing. It was normal at the time because I started going to a Catholic school in kindergarten. So, I grew up with nuns being either the principal or some of the teachers or, you know, in office staff, either the principal or some of the teachers or, you know, in office staff. But now when I look back on it, I realize a lot of things were very interesting. You know, like I had a teacher who happened to be a nun and was teaching sex education, which was definitely interesting From a nun.
Speaker 1:I would like keep my eyes down to the floor.
Speaker 2:The entire time. Yes, it was so interesting. Now, as an adult, I'm like wait, how are you teaching us sex education? I mean some nuns have had.
Speaker 1:I think they can have sex and then they give up sex at some point.
Speaker 2:Or most nuns are like I thought you're not allowed to have sexual relations as a nun or a priest, yeah sexual relations as a nun or a priest?
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I think once you turn into one, so maybe they had a little experience with it before.
Speaker 2:I don't know, maybe I mean it depends, yeah, it depends.
Speaker 1:I guess Any nuns out there let us know, do you get your cherry popped or not? Where do they?
Speaker 2:Oh my sister's going to love this episode Because my sister went to a Catholic school too. Oh my gosh. But no one of my like fondest memories actually was in sex ed with a nun I won't say her name because I think she might still be teaching at the school that I went to um, but everyone was sitting there and she's talking about sex and why it's bad right now and you should wait until x, y and z and. But then at the end of it she says to us but if you are going to do this, go to walmart and they have a blue light special and use protection.
Speaker 2:I love that, that's great advice and till this day, I'm like wait, you were telling us not to have sex, but then telling us to go to Walmart because there's a blue light. What's a blue light special? It's a condom. Is it called a blue? It's blue light condom, Like a blue light. But it was a blue light special on condoms. I don't know about. None of us did.
Speaker 1:We were like what the heck is that Are they still around, I don't know.
Speaker 2:We should go to sponsor us Blue Light Condoms please sponsor Milk and Honeys. But it was just very confusing Very confusing.
Speaker 1:Did you feel like again all I know from non-Catholic schools like Immaculate, a movie you'll never watch?
Speaker 2:a city. Sweeney horror movie.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no. Is that? Nuns are like hard asses and they're mean and like very strict. Was that like how it was? Like did they bring the law?
Speaker 2:down a lot, most of them. Yes, I did have this one principal, though, and she actually was amazing, like her name was Sister John Ellen, and she's still around, and I think I don't know if she still works at the school that I went to, but she is still around and she actually was so sweet and, you know, would come in and do classes, in a sense of teaching us how to like use our fork properly.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean Etiquette classes how to like eat, use our fork properly. You know what I mean, etiquette classes. And, um, there was one time where, long story short, uh, we were in class and this girl threw a hot glue gun because we had to like finish up our project. So I asked her for it and so she threw it at me. I don't till this day, I don't know why, um, and it went into my eye and so the glue like hardened on my eye and sister john ellen took me to the er, like she did not wait for anything she saw my eyes, she took me to the er, called my mom.
Speaker 2:My mom left work, came but you know she made sure to rush me to the hospital to make sure like I was okay and um, and I just remember like sitting in her car, which is so crazy because it's like at the time, like do nuns drive, you know, but they do, like she got, I think it was like Toyota Corolla Do nuns drive.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, but it was just like you know. It's like you never really see them. I never see a nun in a car. I'm like how are we getting?
Speaker 2:there in her Toyota Corolla, and it was that her Toyota Corolla, and it was. It was that sounds like a nun car, yes, and so I still to this day. Um, if I could connect with her, I would, but besides her, every other nun that I was taught by, or like my sister and I were taught by, um, yeah, it was pretty scary Like there was this one nun. She was just so tall, she was like six two and and she when she would get mad.
Speaker 1:She was like 6'2" and when she would get mad her face would get so red it was going to explode. And my sister and I we still talk about her to this day because she was really scary and maybe because she was just so big, so tall and red. I was like um, are you sure Like, do you think like having like a nun like that or a teacher like that? Um has kind of framed any like thought process that you have now as an adult, like the guilt and shame that maybe they bestow upon you?
Speaker 2:at that age. You know, I think I've done a lot of work so that, no, that's not the case for me anymore. No, that's not the case for me anymore. But I will say, yes, obviously, anytime I did anything or pushed a boundary or anything like that, it would that guilt does. Or if you have like a really fun night with your friends and like maybe you had some I don't know 40s or something like that, that, but like that guilt comes back and you're like, oh, I'm not supposed to do that if you had sex and you're like, oh yeah, like I'm now going to hell because I'm having sex, when, like, oh, I'm not supposed to do that.
Speaker 2:Or if you had sex and you're like, oh yeah, like I'm now going to hell because, I'm having sex when someone's telling me I'm not supposed to be having sex, and so yeah, it does.
Speaker 2:And I know a lot of people who are still like super religious that went to that school and I'm friends with a lot of them and they're great people, you know, but it's just. It is that that religious, that Catholic guilt. I guess people like to call it Um, but I'm sure it happens in all formats of religion, but for me it was just we called it the Catholic guilt because it's always.
Speaker 2:It's always there you know, and I mean my family always gave you know all the money. They donated everything that they could donate their time, whatever but we never went to church okay, you didn't really go to like masses, my dad was baptist, my mom was catholic but, like, obviously, they sent us to catholic school, um, for just the safety purposes.
Speaker 2:You know, like, my mom grew up in san francisco and was in the public school system and during all the, yeah, I saw a lot that was going on. Yeah, she, just she, went through a lot, especially as a latin woman and a predominantly, um, a predominantly black school, you know. So, uh, I think for her it was let's just send them there because we know there's protection there, um, but, yeah, every time we would go to church which would be Easter, yeah, the good holidays, the good holiday Our family would walk in and the priest would literally look at my family and say, wow, it's so nice to have the Curry family grace us with their presence and you know, and that makes us want to come back so much more, so much more, thank you but then they're like thank you for gracing us with your presence.
Speaker 2:Um, the basket money, Thank you, Thank you. But then they're like thank you for gracing with your presence. The basket Money, Money. It's just that. Sounds about right, you know, it's just so. Yeah, it's a very interesting world to grow up in. What?
Speaker 1:advice would you give to like young kids, young girls especially, who maybe are entering into like the Catholic school space?
Speaker 2:I guess I would say Hmm.
Speaker 1:What would I say to them? And I'm sure there are positive elements to it, of course.
Speaker 2:Of course. Of course I mean, like I said, I'm not very religious myself, so I'm more spiritual, so I do take things that I learned there and maybe not turn it into the same thing of how they wanted us to see it, but I do see certain stories from the Bible that I can relate to. Of course, maybe not necessarily it's something where it's specifically that situation happened, but I can see where, okay, I can use this in my life. So I think the advice I would give is, when you're learning these things from people, your teachers, it's taking it as it comes and using it to your life as it's happening. You know so, and not taking everything so literal, because I do think in religion, a lot of times, people do take things very, very literal no deviation, yeah.
Speaker 2:And it doesn't have to be that way. Yeah, so that's the advice I would give them. Just don't take everything literal, very literal. No deviation, yeah, and it doesn't have to be that way. Yeah, so that's the advice I would give them. Just don't take everything literal. Use those stories, take them and envision them how you would like to learn from that, to be a better person. And a better person doesn't mean that you have to know the Bible front and back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, supply it to your life Bible front and back.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Supply it to your life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was a crazy. I'm even wearing socks today because I and they have holes in them.
Speaker 1:This is very holy girl. Holy girl, okay, so don't judge me From her head, her shoulders, her knees and her socks.
Speaker 2:I realized that I have holes in these socks these are one of my favorite socks. Like growing up, we had uniform.
Speaker 1:Oh, you were with the knee-high socks, right? No, they would let us the movies.
Speaker 2:Those are just well. Maybe some schools it depends on like what uniform you were given. None of my friends I remember friends I remember wore like knee-high socks, maybe like sometimes to be cute, but like it wasn't mandatory. But in the beginning of going there there was no uh uniform for socks so what I?
Speaker 2:would do is wear colorful socks or patterned socks or you know, like to show my personality a little bit, and then I was able to do that for maybe like two or three years and then they put in a guideline that we could only wear white, black or navy blue socks and I was like boring, okay, and I knew it was because of me. I was the only girl that really like wore he.
Speaker 1:She hiked up her skirts, wore colorful socks. She was the rebel. I was. I really was. Were you like the leader? Do you have like other little Catholic school girls following you?
Speaker 2:I wasn't the leader, but I was in a group where, like there were leaders in there Okay, but I definitely wasn't the leader there was, like girls, some of my friends like growing up, like elementary, junior, high school, that were definitely more of a leader than me. Um, what are they doing now with their?
Speaker 1:lives. Are they killing it in life like?
Speaker 2:you they are oh, I mean they're not in the entertainment industry bullies, they were just leaders yeah, they were just leaders.
Speaker 2:Like you know, I'm talking about, like regina george no, no, no, I mean, don't get me wrong there was one time and I still feel very bad about this how I handled it but I knew that there was this girl in school who was writing about people in our class how she would want them to die, wow. So I knew that she was writing this because I kind of saw it sometimes like briefly, and so instead and this is, you know, don't do this, okay, if you're listening.
Speaker 2:Okay, I took her diary during recess and ran all the way to the blacktop corner and me and my friends opened it to see what's what was said in there, because I knew that we were all in there. Burn book, yes, and literally I mean some some of the ways was like I hope so and so gets hit by lightning, or like I hope so and so gets ran over by a car, or like food poisoning or crazy things. Right granted, I should have told a teacher first and foremost. I should not have taken her burn book and let all of the girls in the class read it who are our friends. But at the time I was what? In seventh grade.
Speaker 1:I think you did a service.
Speaker 2:You were warning these people about their potential deaths that she was For sure, but I definitely should have just handed it Sister John Ellen, actually was our, our principal, so I should have handed it to sister john said hey, I don't want to steal from somebody.
Speaker 2:But yeah, this girl I know there's things in here that we need to address and she ended up getting suspended and I didn't because I, I was honest, I said I I'm the one that took it and I I'm sorry, but I was really concerned for my friends. Yeah, like what we were, and it wasn't just my friend, she said it about like so many people in the class.
Speaker 1:I hope she's okay to this day.
Speaker 2:She is I, I think we found each other like on Facebook years ago. Okay, and she's good. I think she's like super open, sexually wise, like she is a lesbian now and I think you know she was just struggling with her own demons and going through things and her being maybe having these feelings in a Catholic school and not being able to express them to anybody.
Speaker 1:Yeah, all that pent up like shit will definitely get you and manifest in its own way.
Speaker 2:I understood like why? Now, as an adult, I understand like she was just this, was just her projecting um.
Speaker 1:She wasn't bringing a gun to school to shoot at school.
Speaker 2:No, no, no but again, who like, but who would have known? So I mean who knows, yeah, so I do regret I mean not not that I regret it, I just a lot and that was without social media, yeah, but this is seventh grade, so there was absolutely no social media.
Speaker 1:We didn't have any of that. Back then again, we got bullied in real time, in real life. I don't know what's worse between like cyber bullying and like real life bullying. I honestly think I prefer the real life bullying Like let's meet me in the playground and punch me if you want to laugh about it and then move on the next day versus like the group chats and like the social media yeah, like creating the fake accounts and that stuff, I think.
Speaker 1:I would like to see a study research on like the suicide rates of young kids, like then and now, based on like cyber bullying versus, yeah, like real bullying suicide and depression and I feel like the cyber bullying days are way worse. I think well, it's just you have more time.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, guys, I just hit the mic um, I think you have more time behind a computer, yeah, to really say what you want to say, and in person, sometimes you get riled up and you forget what you want to say Back then it was like yo mama, that's what I had to say Yo mama, You're like, don't talk about my mama.
Speaker 1:That literally was like the extent of our insults to each other.
Speaker 2:I mean in high school hindsight like in high school when I did decide to go to like a public school for a little bit and I had both. I had in-person bullying and cyber bullying and they're both pretty up there.
Speaker 1:They're both pretty like I was allowed to have social media in high school. Like I think I got a Facebook towards the end.
Speaker 2:This was MySpace. I meant MySpace. I was allowed to have a.
Speaker 1:MySpace towards the end, but like so we didn't really, I didn't really get to experience all that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, thankfully, yeah, no, it was bad. I mean it was it was not fun and, like I said, I just think they have more time to be clever in their, in their comebacks and create like an army.
Speaker 1:You know, I think that's what people can do is like again this they can free all these people around you, yeah, and so, like you know, sydney sweeney's of the world, who does this ad and before social media and go on like a magazine cover and people will talk about it, but there's nowhere for it to go. Now she's like laying on her bed scrolling through comments and there's millions just saying she's ugly, she's whatever. It is a lot worse.
Speaker 2:It's a lot worse, I agree, I, yeah, I totally agree. Social media it's just crazy. It's just crazy. But you, my friend, went to multiple different schools. Yes, I did.
Speaker 1:Growing up.
Speaker 2:Yes, I went to the same school from K through 8th grade, okay, and then I tried going to a public school for two and a half years. Didn't work out. Went back to private school. Catholic school took me back, thanks, so, yeah, so I didn't. I I've known pretty much like the same people, yeah, kind of my whole life, kind of you know. But what, what was it like for you to be bouncing around schools? How many schools did you actually go to?
Speaker 1:Well between. So I was before foster care, I was. So I was fourth grade when I entered foster care, so my first three years of school I went to a different school every year. So I was just like never had friends, never had like a place, never had the identity. Uh, I was in austin, texas.
Speaker 1:There was like this big, like well-known all-black school called barbara jordan barbara jordan is a famous, you know historical black woman, and I was the lightest skin girl that went there besides my little white sister, erica, and felt very out of place there because I again was light skin at an all black school. I'd try to like, talk black and be black, which is anyway. If you're mixed, you get it. And then we went to this other school called white stone.
Speaker 2:Enough said in the name I'm sorry, hold on, what was it?
Speaker 1:called white stone. So then I'm like oh shit, I am black, no more.
Speaker 2:So then I turned into the white kayla oh, did you turn like did you turn like the white country? Listen, I don't have a code switch like you've never seen before.
Speaker 1:Yeah, before I was four, oh, oh my gosh, and then I went to, moved to the foster home, went to like the local elementary school, was there fourth, fifth, sixth grade. In sixth grade I made cheerleader. This was like a big deal. But then, like my two best friends turned on me that year, we got into this big fight, fight on the playground. They were mad at me about some stupid shit. Like I wore like sexy skinny jeans to school. They thought I was trying to get attention.
Speaker 2:Well, like we've talked about, you have a good ass, so they were just jealous of your ass.
Speaker 1:I was 12.
Speaker 2:I had a show off my ass. Yeah, like hello. Homecoming court was coming up.
Speaker 1:So my parents knew how upset I was and they're like you know what? There's a new Christian school opening up down the street, like 30 minutes on the road. Do you want to transfer schools? I'm like, yeah, whatever it takes, get me out of here. So I moved to this other school Again brand new school. It was all like in trailers. It was almost like a trailer park school that was funded by the parents basically.
Speaker 2:I just actually saw a meme yesterday that was like they didn't even rebuild schools for us. They just put us in these trailer things with like the ramps coming up. That's literally what my school was. Yeah, that's what they did for us too.
Speaker 1:And the best part is on the way to school. Every day, at the gas station next to the school, we picked up some fried frog legs. So I would have fried frog legs for breakfast. Oh no, oh no.
Speaker 2:They're good.
Speaker 1:I'll get you some fried frog legs and some boiled peanuts. I don't want a ribbit. No, a ribbit. You also have rabbit no they're just too cute.
Speaker 1:I don't know, they are cute anyway, so but then that school was an all white school, so I was one of two mixed girls that went there and we hated each other. That's a whole other story. So, yeah, I think my entire like school was just me trying to find my place and like not knowing where, like who I was, or like what color I was supposed to be or how I fit in with these kids. Um. So yeah, that was that was. That was rough, and again, it was a Christian school.
Speaker 2:My chemistry teacher there, his best friend, was the principal there and so I just felt I was constantly in this like, yep, this, this, this, this bubble, this did you so when you were moving around like a lot, you said you didn't, you weren't really able to make friends, not really like I always thought my very first friend ever, um was well, two first friends, lauren Knight and Chrissy Cleveland, um and Arielriel wilkins actually three friends.
Speaker 1:They came up to me in the fourth grade and they just kind of like took me under the wing. They knew about me because I was like this new foster kid. Everyone knew about the foster kids in the town again small town and they took me. We're still friends. Well, me, lauren and chrissy were still friends to this day.
Speaker 2:I was at chrissy's wedding.
Speaker 1:um, so yeah, that was like such a big moment, like as a kid, like I have friends now and it is nice to look back and be like 25 years later I'm still talking to these people every once in a while.
Speaker 2:That's the best part. It's like regardless of everything that we had to go through going to private schools. You know it's, it is nice I get. I still am friends with people that I've known since then, since kindergarten. It's crazy.
Speaker 2:Since I was five years old, like I still am friends with people that I've known since kindergarten. It's crazy. Since I was five years old, like I still know what they're doing. I've gone to some of their weddings. I've met their kids. Like you know, most of them have at least one or multiple kids now and they're married. And they're in school age now.
Speaker 1:Maybe that's what's important for like people going to school now is to like really try to find your little tribe. Yes, because they, you know it can last for a lifetime absolutely find the right people.
Speaker 2:Did you ever like decorate your locker? Were you that girl or no?
Speaker 1:I think so I'm trying to remember so again. I went to this christian school that was so intensely christian school and I think we did like, during homecoming week, we all got to like decorate our lockers and I think I remember I've been told a few times I was sacrilegious based on the way I like decorated or did my final school project Like I did. I did a rap. Like I, I rapped a Christian. I made up a Christian rap song called Sipp Sipping on the word.
Speaker 2:I still remember all the lyrics, Are you? Can we like have a preview of?
Speaker 1:this. Don't be sipping on the haterade. Be sipping on the word. Be telling folks about Jesus. Make sure everyone done heard About the great things he did and how he came to die so all of us could one day join him in the sky.
Speaker 2:And that is Kayla Becker, everyone.
Speaker 1:I did a whole music video where I had all my. I did a whole music video where I had all my. I got a bunch of Coca-Cola bottles and we took off the label and wrote beer on it. So I had all my friends like drinking beer and then did this whole like I'm a very like think hinder or, like you know, like music videos from back in the day and I thought I have it on a disc somewhere and I remember the teacher, this old lady who was over the project, called my parents and told them to come in to look at it. They're like this is very inappropriate and they're my parents like completely defended me. They're like you can't tell. Like she did the project very creative and it was all about like christianity and jesus. Like I think it's okay, but like they don't know any black people at this school. So they're like rap music is the devil's music and I'm over here like don't be sipping on that hater, right, Be sipping on the word.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's pretty catchy. I'm not going to lie. I mean honestly, don't be sipping on the hater right, be sipping on the word, be telling folks about Jesus, make sure everyone down heard.
Speaker 1:And then they're like, oh, snack, that's okay. Oh, I had some backup people, so our name spelt out snack S-N-A-C-K. So I was like, oh, snack, that's right. No, we don't bite. We've been saved by the one who has called the light. He's been saving his people for ages and ages, but people still don't believe what's written on the pages People been breathing in. I was good.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, we need to record this. I you go like viral on TikTok because we record and then we come up with like a little dance and then it goes crazy.
Speaker 1:It might. You have a Christian album Sipping on the word Well, and growing up, though, is all my parents let me listen to was Christian music For sure, and so I loved rap and like heavy metal, so I found rap and heavy metal Christian artists. So I found rap and heavy metal Christian artists, so I was inspired a lot by that. That's amazing. So when I put this together, that's amazing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that right, there is amazing. That's a little bit about me. I'm shocked Like I'm shooketh. Honestly, this is amazing. I did not. I wasn't expecting that. I'm hot. It's not in the rundown, it's not even in the rundown, but she gave it to us. So what was the next thing we want to?
Speaker 1:talk about. Oh well anyway, but no, honestly, that was a big part of like okay, being brown in a white school and me leaning into that a lot. Yeah, did put a target on my back. So, like people love calling me like mut was dating this because the boys liked me. The boys liked me because I was something different and their parents would say things to them like if you bring her home, there'll be two nooses waiting for you, one for you, one for her. Oh my god, I had a teacher. Actually I walked into a classroom it wasn't my classroom, I just walked in. I was at an accident. He goes hey, little black girl, get out of here. To where the senior, like ran out, was like are you okay? And he went to the principal on my behalf, like it was just such a like openly racist school to where I just never felt like. And this was like another me having a code switch again.
Speaker 2:I'm so sorry no, I mean thank you. No, I mean that's that no one should, but this is a and that's what's funny this is a christian school exactly, and this is how I was treated.
Speaker 1:It's supposed to be Christians, and like all these things and blah blah blah. Send me back to the public school please.
Speaker 2:Do you think that like that environment like hurt your sense of identity? Or do you think, being in that environment, you got to tell yourself no, no, no, I know exactly who I am. I know that these people just don't understand me.
Speaker 1:I mean I think kind of both. Like I think to this day I still struggle a lot with it, my identity, because I think I just I've never lived in a place where I was okay, allowed to be Like. I didn't even know I was not white until I was probably seven and my sister's boyfriend called me the N-word and I was like what is that? And then I learned, oh oh, I'm actually black because all my siblings are white, so I just didn't know it was different, right. And then um, and then yeah, having to code, switch so much, and then I think it's helped me figure out a lot of things.
Speaker 1:I know exactly who I am, but I do still find myself like being a chameleon when I have to be, because it's so easy for me to be and I wish it wasn't so easy sometimes, like I want to just be Kayla authentically 100% of the time, but I know, like how to. If I'm put in a situation I can be, like I can turn this part on. I can turn this part on, you know, yeah, which it's a blessing and a curse, but for sure you know it's yeah, I mean work in progress.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think that's. That's probably. That is probably sometimes going to a school like that, where you don't necessarily identify yourself as that. Yeah, it's like you have to put this on in order to get by and not get in trouble for certain things. So, yeah, like you don't get to actually be yourself. You know, it is weird. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it too, it's like I never wanted to get in trouble, you know. So I would try and do the right thing, yeah, but that right thing is the right thing in their eyes, not for you, not for me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, like with religion, and like you said about, like how we were taught in, like a religious upbringing or schools, about sex, like I was forced or told I had to wear a promise ring.
Speaker 1:So we all did this whole. Like all the girls had to wear their little promise ring. Don't take it off to your marriage and then you give that to the man that you're going to give your flower to. Wow, mine came off during act prep, sixth period, when I was 15 years old. You know like. But like these little, these things that you like are trying to force kids to do based on religion, like most of the time they're gonna go against it. It's either gonna happen at that age or five years into their perfect marriage when they're like oh, I didn't get to live my life the way I wanted to do it, I did it based on fear.
Speaker 1:Right, because the religion is based around fear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like organizations like that is all based around that Right. It's based on making sure that we can have these people feel this way about this one entity. That's it. And if you don't do right by this one entity, then you're going to hell, you're doomed to hell.
Speaker 1:It's like everything is like don't like even like go off a little. You know path like suicide. You know I feel like we see a lot of you know it's so unfortunate, it's really sad. And I've dealt with mental health issues. You know we've all dealt with mental health and it's like and Christianity, if you commit suicide, you're doomed to hell, right and like that's so messed up to me. Yeah, so you mean to tell me someone like and that's what, just what you're taught, Right, and these like organizations and it's just, or like being gay being gay I talked to isn't an easy life for us, and so it's just so sad. God makes no mistakes.
Speaker 2:Well, then you're right, he doesn't.
Speaker 1:If that's the case, then leave my gay man alone. He's going to be right up there in heaven with all of us with the rainbow flags, Exactly.
Speaker 2:Exactly Like living it up, like living it up, living it up, but yeah, it's just, it's a's a, it was a very. I haven't like thought about that in so long. I just haven't thought about catholic school in a very long time. But yeah, I mean I will say yes, safety wise, sure, yeah, I, I appreciate it. Um, and then also being able to see being in a catholic environment, private school environment and then a public school environment, I saw the difference and you felt like it was for me and you just thrived a lot better.
Speaker 2:It's like if someone tried to jump me at my private school. You're gone.
Speaker 1:You're gone.
Speaker 2:But in public school it's like first warning, second warning, third warning, you get suspended for a couple days and then you're back. I'm like, now you have, now you're back at school with this person.
Speaker 1:You know, did you ever get suspended or in detention or anything? Detention yes all you can say all the time, not all the time. Sorry mom, maybe it was just like you know it's funny. You know it's funny, yes I can you already know what it is? Talking too much and um Clothes.
Speaker 2:Just one other Clothes, not so much Skipping class, making out with boys in the wait. Were there boys there? No, no, I mean, yes, there were. Okay, there were plenty of boys there. I actually like had, I think, my first kiss at like daycare. I was like after school daycare.
Speaker 1:We played spin the bottle, this, this with a coca-cola, with like a can't go in daycare, yeah, we would go to like to the corner of the black top of the basketball top oh so black top is like it's.
Speaker 2:They had many different, like basketball courts okay, and it's. It's a black, it's like a, like a black cement, so we would call it the black top, okay? So, yes, that's what I mean when I'm saying black top. It's not anything having to do with racial anything.
Speaker 1:I didn't think that at all. No, I know, but just for our audiences.
Speaker 2:That's not what I'm saying. But yes, we would go to the corner of the blacktop and we would take like our little can and we would play spin the bottle, oh my. You know because they didn't know, we were just sitting in a circle. They probably thought we were doing kumbaya or prayer circle. No, we weren't doing a prayer circle, we were playing spin the block.
Speaker 1:Oh my Wait, okay. So what did you do? Detention for, though.
Speaker 2:I didn't. Most of it was for being late, Tardy.
Speaker 1:Which hello. That's why I was like, why I know, like it's like a I'm getting better.
Speaker 2:Even today, I was only five minutes late. I was only five minutes late, you guys, I was, and I'm getting better, I'm getting better.
Speaker 1:This time next year she'll be only two minutes late. No, this time next year.
Speaker 2:I will be on time. I'm going to be 15 minutes early. I'm going to be like Kayla, almost there. I'm like okay, great, I'm here. I'm sitting at the table. Yeah, like, where are you?
Speaker 1:I have our wine ready and I'm such a stickler for time, like it's like to a fault, like it's too bad, like it's-.
Speaker 2:No, it's not.
Speaker 1:No, but my all my friends, every friend in my life, none of them are ever on time. Make sure I'm like I think about parking and traffic, Like my brain is just like that. Yeah, If someone is late, oh, I know I've had dates show up like five minutes late or say they're five minutes late. I'm like you missed me, I'm sorry. She's like sorry, I'm gone I know it was LA traffic rush hour, but you missed me. I calculated it. I calculated what time to get here.
Speaker 2:Why can't you? Oh my gosh. But yeah, that's probably why. But I wasn't. I wasn't like a troublemaker, in a sense of I was always getting in trouble like were you I don't think you know, I got like so we had um funny.
Speaker 1:They called it ass. What is that?
Speaker 2:after school suspension ass, ass you literally had to go to ass you had. You're going to ask you name after school.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's in, but it was always for talking and much. And was this at your Christian school? I think? Actually, I think we, oh, I think we had ASS at the public school, okay, but ISS at In school, suspension at the Christian school, which?
Speaker 2:sounds a little close. Anyway, Like hello, just call it detention?
Speaker 1:I don't, we didn't. No one ever called it that there.
Speaker 2:That's insane.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was Interesting, but mine was always for like talking too much, like I disturbed the class and I'm always like, oh well, it's funny, I turned that into a career because now I get paid to talk a lot. Yeah, back then they'd move my desk outside into the hallway and I'd have to stay there for, like my teachers, I mean, at least detention was like after school.
Speaker 2:I wasn't missing school to go to detention.
Speaker 1:I mean what kid was mad that we were missing class. Right, that's what's in school suspension During school hours. We have to go to ISS and I'm like this in this math class? Yeah, oh no, when you have your phones, because we didn't have phones, so we're just like drawing those like Drawing like a one, two, three the S's, or doing that game where, like you, mash, oh my gosh Mash.
Speaker 2:I know I don't remember. You're going to marry, like your something, spouse and then house. What was the A?
Speaker 1:I don't remember Was it like car Automotive Like automobile.
Speaker 2:So it was like MASH, who you're gonna marry what?
Speaker 1:car you're gonna drive.
Speaker 2:Who you're gonna. It's your spouse. No, because Mary is spouse. Oh, you're right.
Speaker 1:S We'll have to like, if we're gonna look this up, maybe we should play MASH. Oh, career, career. What has that s?
Speaker 2:I don't remember we'll look it up like what's the action. Yeah, hold on. What is the s bother me? What? Okay, what is the s in mash game shack? Okay, wait so mansion apartment, shack house, oh, so it was just like no, it's just what you're gonna end up in.
Speaker 1:A mansion, oh wait, no Living situation spouse number of kids, yeah, but I feel like it was marriage, automobile shack, I don't remember.
Speaker 2:So yeah, it was job car city number of kids. Oh wait mansion apartment.
Speaker 1:Oh no, because you did, and that was just about what home you were going to be in. Then you had to do all these side ones.
Speaker 2:Okay, got it, got it. We should play next. We should do this.
Speaker 1:We'll post this on our social media.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, we'll do a MASH for sure.
Speaker 1:Wait, do you know what a medium and a bad, yeah, subcategory. And then you pick numbers and go around and around and around. Okay, we'll have to play with you. Yeah, yeah, because Alex he's helping us.
Speaker 2:Mash was so fun it was, but yeah, that's all we had. We would literally do or write notes to your crush, right? Oh, yes, I wrote notes, would literally write to. I still have them. I have a little box of notes I the most of them were with my friend, kayla Costas, and we'd call each other pookie and so like I have so many notes with her and it would just be like two pookie from pookie and it would be talking about things that we already talked about like yeah, yeah, it was like texting and snapchat back then, which now, like, no one writes notes and snapchat and you had to run the risk of getting your note confiscated by a teacher and then they read it in front of the class, which happened to me way too many times.
Speaker 1:Yes, oh, I miss those days.
Speaker 2:I know I do, but I don't like I do but I don't.
Speaker 1:If we were starting school like now in 2025, what would be your biggest fear?
Speaker 2:social media. Yeah, that would be my biggest fear. It. I think I think there's so much pressure on kids these days. Um, like even my niece, who's nine, she wants to put stuff. You know, she wants to like always film stuff and post it and I think she would be really cute on it and fun on it. But it there is obviously my sister, my brother-in-law are very protective over her and and my other niece also, but obviously Ellie's like nine, so she's a little older and you know, anytime she's with me, she knows that's what I do for a part of my living and so she always wants to film stuff. And I remember us doing a live on TikTok about brushing her hair and I remember someone saying something not necessarily bad about her, but like, just like something negative, and I wanted to kill this person through the screen and I realized, oh shit, like this, this is just what it is. Even with a nine-year-old, people are still gonna have some shit to say which is insane to me so I think yeah, what about you?
Speaker 2:I mean probably the same thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like I'm. I'm a, you know, I'm a sensitive gangster, as they call. Like I, you know, try to play hard, but the stuff on social media is still like. Today I posted a thing like hey, our legacy video. I was like hey, how do you want to like leave your legacy? And someone responded like to not have shit stains all over my face like you, because, like this guy, he always comes after me about my freckles.
Speaker 1:He's so offended by freckles wow, that is um, but initially I wanted to respond I'm like. But then why? Like, yeah, I think I get more compliments on my freckles than anything else. I know it was a bit as a kid. It was my biggest insecurity where, like, I wanted them to go away. They weren't trendy back then. Now people are paying to put them on their face, right, but like, I don't know if I was a kid and got comments like that how I would handle it, like I you know it would have been really tough and I'm glad we didn't have that uh back then okay, uh, what advice do we give kids who maybe feel different at school?
Speaker 2:I think we both went through that feeling different at school that's such a hard one, because I would want to say just own it and know that we're all special individually and so that that maybe different thing that you do have is probably what's going to make you a lot of money down the line. Exactly what I was going to say.
Speaker 1:Like all the different nerds, weirdos, ones who are made fun of. Use that as your motivation and just take over the world to where, like, when you go home, they're like wanting to see you or take a photo with you or brag about the fact that they went to school with you, while they're sitting on their couch 300 overweight with, yeah, four baby daddies. Yeah, personal experience. Yeah, saying everybody's like that, but yeah, like, own it, make it in, yeah yeah, I mean make your life out, even even like having.
Speaker 2:I've had a big butt my entire life ever since I was little and people damn it.
Speaker 1:No, but it's like I used to want it to go away. I know Back then before the Kardashians were around.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like I wanted my butt. I was like I hate my butt and da, da, da, da. Like it's like you know, people always make comments on it. And now I'm like, and then it's like some people get offended when I show off my butt. I'm like, bro, hater, be jealous, like it's okay, but that is crazy to me. Like I used to just hate my not my body totally, but my body, yeah, like that. It's always been there. I've always had a butt and it's just and it's funny. It's like when the kardashians obviously started becoming a thing back in the day, people would ask me if my butt was real or not, and I would be so offended but just like taking it back Like what, Like wait, Like I didn't even understand that that was a thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I'm like, well, if you look at my seven-year-old photos.
Speaker 1:I've always had this little bubble butt, like always. My seven-year-old photos. I always had this little bubble butt, like always. It is funny how things like that that you were bullied for, that I was bullied for now are like. I'm sure you still get asked. I got stopped on Sunset and someone was like oh my god, I love your freckles. What did you get them done? And I'm like what, like what? Yes, and our asses. I from my dad's side, okay, not from my mama's side. My mom's side of the family, they have no butts.
Speaker 2:Thanks daddy. Yeah, except for actually my cousin Carlotta. She has a big ass too. So we were the big booty girls like me, my sister, and my cousin.
Speaker 1:Everyone was mad like y'all took it all.
Speaker 2:Yeah, everyone else had no ass except for my dad's side. Else had no ass except for my dad's side. They all had big booty, big juicy butts and I'm like, thank you, thank you all, my Baton Rouge family.
Speaker 1:Okay, before we go, wait, no, go ahead.
Speaker 2:No, I was going to ask you. No, no, no, no go. I forgot, here we go. This is what happens.
Speaker 1:I was going to rapid fire. I don't know the answers to all of this, but okay, if we had to go through having number two pencils and erasers versus iPads what would you prefer having when you were growing up?
Speaker 2:I love writing on paper and that's probably because I'm a millennial, but I, oh God. But now, if I had an iPad back, then I know I just love. I love the feeling of like a pen to paper or paper pencil to paper.
Speaker 1:I got issued sentences all the time. Growing up I had to write like a hundred two hundred sentences, if I could. Just you can't really do that with someone with an iPad. Now you just copy and paste, do you? Have to do kids still write sentences?
Speaker 2:I don't. Yes, they do. I was trying to think if I've seen my niece yes, she writes, and she still writes yeah.
Speaker 1:But let me like sentence it like as a punishment. No, you don't remember doing that? I don't think so. Did you do that? Yes, okay, do you know what it is? I know what it is. So, kids, don't do that anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, maybe that is the punishment though Maybe they do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, yeah, carrie. Haley books versus notes, versus Snapchat Passing notes.
Speaker 2:There's something so sweet about that. There's so sweet about like making it into a little triangle or something and like flicking it across the room. A little frog, yeah, yeah, like, just like, like got it.
Speaker 1:Or just like knowing Pass that over. Yeah, pass it over three rows. Yeah, yeah, yeah don't know. Yeah, I like snapchat is still scary too to me, because in the beginning, especially when it was like when there's a big leak that's when I deleted mine back in 2012, 2012 I mean we should get back on it. People are like making money off that shit I didn't even know you could do that. Yes, I think. I don't know. I think there's an age I don't fuck. I think I'm too old to be on snapchat.
Speaker 2:I don't think so I'm gonna you do it. Let me know how it goes for you. Okay, I did try for like a second for like a couple of days and I was like I'm just tired.
Speaker 1:I wouldn't date a guy who was on a Snapchat, because I don't trust it. I feel like people be sending like some sketchy shit they do.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, they for sure do, especially when it first came out. It's like yeah, you people were sending nudes left and right because it's gonna go away.
Speaker 1:Nothing goes. You can screenshot it in the universe of the internet, it never goes away all right, being called up to the board, which I hate it, especially like I had really bad sweat issues when I was younger, like I was at sweaty armpits and then you have to go up to the board and write and yeah, come, finish the math problem versus, like now, you know, zoom school during covid I would have begged my parents to be, uh, in a zoom school, right.
Speaker 2:I would have begged them because I I danced right, so I had a community. It's not like I would have been this like homeschool jungle freak.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know I.
Speaker 2:There's nothing wrong with homeschool, oh no, no, but I'm just I'm quoting mean girls if you don't know, okay, but there is a stigma, but there's a stigma behind it, but I still, to this day, like my sister and I talk about it Like we would have been fine being homeschooled?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because you had other people and friends.
Speaker 2:Especially if there was Zoom involved. Like you know back in yeah which I would have much rather of that, because I had anxiety. You asked me a question that I already know, like what research is, and like I get so anxious in front of people. Sometimes I forget the answer and in Zoom I feel like, oh, oh, I'm in my own space, it's, I'm safe and I can say it and even if they laugh at me, whatever, like.
Speaker 2:I can't really see them turn camera off. Yes, exactly okay. Detention versus cancel culture, that's an easy one attention detention I would.
Speaker 1:I would be in detention every day as an adult, as a grown-up.
Speaker 2:Please put me in detention yeah please tell me, I cannot go to work and let me know like I will pass out. You won't even know.
Speaker 1:I'll like take a little nap on the desk, no problemo. Turn the lights out, did you ever?
Speaker 2:did you ever take naps like that and then all of a sudden, you, no, no, I would twitch. And then what I would do in class is I would twitch and be like what I wasn't asleep, no, you knew I was asleep. No, I was like I'm good, my teachers would slam the ruler on the desk and just yeah, no, All right.
Speaker 1:Recess drama versus group chat leaks. Again, I said it earlier Recess drama. I'd rather face-to-face bullying versus the cyber bullying stuff.
Speaker 2:I'd rather have a conversation.
Speaker 1:Yeah, or just punch me in the face once and let's move on. And then uniforms versus, you know, being cute and aesthetic and having to like, figure out your outfits and don't wear skinny jeans at school, your friends are gonna be mad at you. Or you just come to school all in the same uniform and then you can't really get made fun of. I actually think I wish I had that option.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean don't get me wrong Like I love being aesthetically pleasing in any way I can, but I do think I was tired.
Speaker 1:I did not want to have to think about my outfit.
Speaker 2:And every night before. I had to like pick out my outfit for school, I would rather have a uniform, like I knew I was wearing this skirt, this, this sweater, or these pants, this top, this sweater and these shoes, whereas my high school it was semi-uniform. So it was like you had to wear khaki pants. You could wear any color, uh uh, collared shirt, but it'd have to be collared shirt like. So then you're spending money to wear back to school clothes that like you don't really want to wear, like.
Speaker 2:I don't even remember the last time I've worn a collared shirt because like, or like those khaki pants, because it's just like it's. It's one of those things where and then we would all show up wearing like kind of the same thing. I mean, me and my best friend would show up literally in the same thing.
Speaker 1:Sometimes it'd be hilarious we talk to the same air apostle.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, uh, air apostle hollister and abercrombie, yeah, but like it couldn't have abercrombie, it could have the little yeah, bird, but it couldn't have the full name that was so, not fetch yeah absolutely not.
Speaker 1:Um, all right. Well, guys, that's a little bit of our uh. We made school sound really bad. We didn't mean to, but it's one. Like you know, this is what we're just venting I haven't had a good vince session about growing up in a school that I grew up in a while, so and honestly like shout out to my sister, because she was the one telling me you guys should talk about back to school because she, you know she's dealt with this a lot too, so she understands.
Speaker 2:Oh well, do we have?
Speaker 1:any final words to this new generation going back to school right now. Like you said, own your shit, do the work, don't try to dumb yourself down to seem cool, because that was really thing I think, yeah, I, I think that's over, though, thank goodness yeah, like being dumb. Being dumb is it like cute anymore, I think. I think being smart is like the new is the new? I mean, I used to like I would fail a test back then because I got like bullied for being the smart kid in class.
Speaker 2:I wish I was bullied for being smart.
Speaker 1:No, I did my homework, but I got like.
Speaker 2:C's Like I said, if I got a. C on a test. I'm not a good test taker, unfortunately so that's OK.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a test.
Speaker 2:And also, you know we wanted to give a shout out to Jay Balvin. You know he's giving back to the Latin community through his Vibra and Alta Foundation, which focuses on education and empowerment for the Colombian youth, and I just think that's really cool. I don't think a lot of people are talking about it, but he deserves his flowers because he really has taken a stance on trying to make a difference, especially from where he comes from, but not only from where he comes from, but shedding light on that with children all around the world, and so I just think that's really cool.
Speaker 2:And it's nice to see celebs who take the time to give back, and we know that they're extremely busy and their schedules are scheduling.
Speaker 1:I want to focus on, like the education of youth and, I think, celebrities who do take that route. He probably has some stories about growing up, you know, as as as a, you know, kid, in this education system that we've had for the last several years.
Speaker 2:So, yes, kudos, so kudos. Thank you, Jay Balvin. Thank you for trying to change that and uh, you know, here we go.
Speaker 1:You, I'm sure J Balvin, drinks tea and if he was drinking tea, we're going to run into it.
Speaker 2:He would be using the best ingredients, which would be Vanessa Curry, myself and Kayla Becker, and he would have the perfect tasting tea. So on that note we will see you guys next time. Bye, bye.
Speaker 1:Have fun in school, kids, don't do drugs, don't do drugs. Oh God, dare, dare. We should have gone in that route.
Speaker 2:Oh fuck, we should have talked about dare I have that thing? We're so good.
