The Inspired Entrepreneur

Season 1 Episode 6 | The Messy Middle: How to Lead Yourself When You Want to Quit

• Deborah Hartnett • Season 1 • Episode 6

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What if the messy middle isn’t the breakdown, but the becoming?

In this episode, I take you behind the scenes of a grueling 21-mile hike and show you how it became the perfect mirror for what it means to stay in the game when business gets hard, messy, and uncertain.

If you're in a season where your momentum has fizzled, your direction feels unclear, and you're quietly questioning whether you can keep going, this episode is for you.

You’ll learn how to lead yourself through the doubt, through the detours, and through the desire to quit. This is the mindset reset and nervous system grounding you didn’t know you needed.


In This Episode, We Cover:

  • The moment your plan breaks, and how to respond instead of retreat
  • How your nervous system might be sabotaging your clarity
  • Why reconnecting to your “why” can override your urge to quit
  • The neuroscience of commitment, and the spirituality of stillness
  • How to ask for help as an act of leadership, not weakness

You’ll leave with this reminder:
 “You’re not behind. You’re just in the part that builds you.”

Where in your life or business is it time to recommit, even if the path looks different than you expected?


Resources & Links:

✨ Registration opens soon!
 Join the FREE training: https://bit.ly/45tawIt

Grab the Inspired Year Game Plan – your first step to building a business and life that feels as good as it looks: https://bit.ly/3SX0W9u

Want to work with Deb or join the Accelerator Waitlist?
Book a 1-on-1 call → inspired-bp.com

Watch the Post-Hike Video – Go behind the scenes and hear the full story of Deborah’s 21-mile journey for CureSearch, the lessons that surfaced, and the moments that almost made her quit: https://youtu.be/iMQnu8zLrJs

🎗️ Support the Cause
This hike was more than just a personal challenge — it was a commitment to the 43 children diagnosed with cancer every single day. If this story moved you, I invite you to take the next step with me.

👉 Donate to Help Fund Lifesaving Research:
https://give.curesearch.org/fundraiser/6066323

🌟 Learn More About the Ultimate Hike and CureSearch’s Mission:
https://curesearch.org/curesearch-ultimate-hike

Every donation brings us closer to better treatments, faster cures, and more childhoods saved. Thank you for being part of this mission. 💛


Music Credit:
 “Who I’ve Always Been” by Beza, licensed via PremiumBeat (License #7089927, Order #5573317) © PremiumBeat.com / Shutterstock Canada, ULC

Legal Disclaimer:
This podcast is for educational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. Please consult qualified experts for medical, legal, mental health, or business matters.

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Website :www.inspired-bp.com
Instagram: @inspiredbusinessperformance
Facebook: @deborahannhartnett

S1 E6 -The Messy Middle: How to Lead Yourself When You Want to Quit

[00:00:00] 

Welcome home 

inspired entrepreneurs. It's Deborah, and today's episode is for you if you're stuck in the middle. Not at the beginning where ideas flow and energy's high and not at the end where the results roll in, but in that messy, uncertain, and sometimes painful middle, when your support feels far away, your direction feels unclear, and you start to question whether you can keep going.

So if you've ever felt like you're walking alone in your business, if your momentum is fizzled and clarity's nowhere to be found, the plan broke and now you're left holding the pieces, this episode's for you.

[00:01:00] 

Recently I did something hard. I hiked 21 miles for Cure Search, a charity that funds research for childhood cancer.

What unfolded over those 13 grueling hours, miles blisters, became a mirror for what it really means to grow something meaningful, to stay in it, to keep walking when it hurts. And here's what you're gonna walk away with today. You will see how the messy middle isn't a detour. It's the work. It's where your business takes shape and where you discover who you really are as a leader.

You'll understand why your nervous system, not your to-do list may be the real thing, calling the shots, and you'll leave knowing how to find your footing when the things that you're doing don't go as planned, and clarity feels out of reach. This is the episode that [00:02:00] reminds you you're not behind. You're just in the part that builds you.

“short pause sound effect (different sound effect please) 

i'm gonna play an excerpt from the hike let me set it up. We got there at 5:30 AM and the gates were supposed to be open early for us, but they weren't. Instead of starting the planned route, we had to pivot, and we had to figure out another route just to get to the starting line.

Okay, update from the trail. We are about, just about a mile and a half in. We had a detour. We did not start where we were supposed to. We have a great group leader though, so we're not lost and, uh, doing good. We haven't hit the first big elevation yet. We've still got a few miles before we hit a, a real doozy.

So, uh, there's my update from the ultimate hike, Northern California.

Not part of the plan, but I knew where I was. Where I was going, the destination hadn't changed. 

I Still had energy, I [00:03:00] still had optimism it was the beginning. We've all been there in our business, it's all excitement, fun and games and anything's possible. And that's where I was at, at that mile and a half range.

“short pause sound effect Turning point, number one is the path will shift, but the commitment stays. This is where so many founders fall off. The moment that the plan breaks, they stop. And I've been guilty of this myself, but commitment means you keep moving towards the finish line, even with a detour.

So let's explore what's really happening under the hood when this moment hits. Your brain experiences a broken plan as. Cognitive dissonance and it shuts down the reward system. Your dopamine dips and the brain registers danger, not possibility. Spirit says, this is sacred ground.

The soul doesn't care how you get there. It cares that you get there. [00:04:00] Commitment isn't about certainty. It's about devotion.

s“short pause sound effect 

The first few miles were energizing. I was hiking with the crew. The vibes were high. Just like those first few months or even years in your business, the adrenaline, the hope, the vision, everything feels possible.

But somewhere between mile eight and a half and mile 14, things got really quiet. People were spread out and some were ahead of me, some were behind. My hiking companions weren't there beside me, and other hikers were passing me by. And then I felt this sharp sting. Oh my God. And I don't know if it was a bee or a wasp, but man, I was alone and the pain was real.

And for a moment I actually panicked, and I took a breath and I reached for my map to refocus just like I tell my clients to do.

They look at their inspired growth map to their five year vision, their [00:05:00] one year goals, their monthly milestones, and most importantly, their inspired purpose to stay intentional, to calm the nervous system, to recalibrate the brain. Short pause sound effect Turning 0.2 is when things fall apart, I. Don't wander reorient.

So what does that look like in action? Well, here's where science and soul come in. So the science says when uncertainty hits your amygdala, your emotional fire alarm kicks in, fight, flight, or freeze. Your logical brain, the prefrontal cortex shuts down. No wonder you can't think clearly. And then Spirit says

you need to pause. Listen, clarity comes not from pushing, but from presence. Stillness is energy. So in other words, the map doesn't just guide your strategy, it calms your system. That's the power of having a purposeful plan. So I breathed, I talked myself down [00:06:00] and I kept going.

 

 This is a good place to pause and take a deep breath together.

So far, we've talked about what happens when the plan breaks and how staying committed, even when the path shifts, is a choice you get to make. We explored how your nervous system reacts when uncertainty hits and why pausing to reorient isn't weakness. It's wisdom. And now we're going even deeper. Let's explore what to do when quitting feels like the easier option.

 Mile 14, my feet were wrecked. I'd already had them taped twice. And the aid station crew looked at me and they said, look, you've done an amazing job. If you stop here, it's still a win. And I thought about it. I [00:07:00] really thought about it. But then I also thought about the people who donated to cure search.

I thought about the kids going through cancer treatment, and I thought about the months of training and about how often my clients, and maybe you hit this exact moment in your business.

Turning 0.3 is when quitting feels easier, reconnect to your why. Easier doesn't mean aligned. Growth isn't always loud.

Sometimes it's the quiet decision to keep going. Science says the brain is wired to conserve energy and avoid pain. It whispers you've done enough, but with self-regulation and purpose-based motivation, you can override that system and access deeper reserves. And spirit says, your why is your lifeline.

When your legs give out, your purpose carries you. Let it, these are the [00:08:00] moments that clarify who you are and what you're committed to. So I did something brave. And I asked for help. There was a father and son nearby and I said, Hey, would you be willing to hike the rest with me? I'm gonna slow you down, but I really need to finish this.

And they said, yes. They stayed with me until the final switchbacks and then a cure search ambassador and the sweeper brought me in. Yep. I was the last person off the trail from 5:45 AM to 7:15 PM 13 and a half hours

 pause sound effect 

Turning 0.4. Leadership isn't doing it all yourself. It's knowing when to ask for support. So let's unpack what that looks like through both lenses. Science says connection co regulates the nervous system. So asking for help calms your brain. Isolation increases stress hormones while companionship [00:09:00] boosts resilience and problem solving.

Spirit says. You were never meant to do this alone. Community is a sacred contract. Let yourself be carried. This is leadership, not just forging ahead alone, but choosing connection.

 pause sound effect 

Let's put this all together. The trail will change. Stay committed. You will lose your way. Pause and reorient. It will get hard. Let your why anchor you and you'll need others. Let them walk with you. This is how you stay in the game when every part of you wants to quit. This is how you lead yourself through the messy middle, and this is how your next level is born.

Not in the outcome, but in the becoming. (you fade out a bit too fast ) 

I.

[00:10:00] 

All right. Inspired ones. Today, we talked through what it really means to lead yourself through the messy middle. We talked about what to do when the plan breaks, how to pause and reorient instead of spiraling. How to reconnect to your why, when it would be easier to quit. And why? Asking for help isn't weakness, it's leadership.

So here's the question I'll leave you with. Where in your life or your business is it time to recommit even if the path looks different than you expected? If this episode moved you, inspired you, or even made you pause for a moment, please share it with someone who's in their own middle right now.

Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next, and I would love to hear from you. Seriously. Come find me on Instagram or shoot me a message. You can look in the show notes [00:11:00] for that contact info and tell me what landed. If you're ready to walk your path with more clarity, calm, and momentum, I'd love to walk with you.

Until next time, keep going. Your becoming welcome home. Welcome to the Inspired Entrepreneur.

 

And because I care about you and wanna keep things above board, here's the Quick legal bit. The Inspired Entrepreneur podcast and content posted by Deborah Hartnett is presented solely for general information, educational and inspirational purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials [00:12:00] linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk.

It's not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional diagnosis or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay obtaining medical, mental health, legal, or business advice for any situation and should seek the assistance of qualified professionals for any such conditions or decisions.

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