More Time for Mom

How Much Is Too Much? The Overwhelming Cost of Constant Information & Nonstop Notifications

Dr. Amber Curtis Episode 29

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Your brain was never designed to handle the nonstop notifications coming at you in this digital age, so it’s no wonder you feel overwhelmed. Whether you realize it or not, “information overload” is taking a real toll on your attention span, productivity, mental health, and relationships.

 In this episode, I’m unpacking why I think things have gotten so problematic and what I am determined to do about it in case you want to do the same.


HOMEWORK:

Your homework for this episode is to do a quick life audit. On a scale of 0 (not at all) to 10 (very), how content do you feel with your current life? To what extent do you find yourself chasing dopamine? How would you rate the level of connection in your current relationships with your spouse, your kids, your friends? Are you feeling a pull to change and improve any of that? Share your thoughts with me via email or DM me on Instagram @solutionsforsimplicity. Would love to connect further! 

 

COMING UP NEXT:

Don’t miss next episode where I interview a highly popular simplicity expert on why and how to declutter your life in both the physical and digital sense so you have more peace in your mind and your home.


CONNECT WITH AMBER: Website | Instagram | YouTube | LinkedIn

Ready to finally get to the root of your problems and change your life FOR GOOD? Book your free 60-minute consult to learn more about working 1:1 with Dr. Amber.

Do you feel like you're losing your mind trying to keep up these days? If so, you are not alone. The word overwhelmed doesn't even do justice to the underlying chaos and frenetic sensations in your body from constantly having more you could or should do than time to do it. Ask me how I know. We are bombarded by more information and noise than any other time in history, making it impossible for your brain to keep up and taking a real toll on your attention span, productivity, mental health, and relationships. In this episode, I am unpacking why I think things have gotten so problematic and what I am determined to do about it in case you want to do the same. Welcome to More Time for Mom, where overwhelmed moms get science-backed strategies to overcome the hidden sources of stress stealing your time and joy. I'm your host, Dr. Amber Curtis. Ready to make more time for you? Let's dive in. If you are listening in real time, it is the middle of September 2025, and I just wrapped up a two-week open enrollment for my mom's Making Time Society. I debated whether to air this publicly or not, but have decided to share it because there are some really key takeaways I have learned from it. I have been in business for over 6 years and have never had a launch go as poorly as this one, which struck me as odd, given how advanced I feel I have gotten all these years in improving my messaging, my marketing, my offers. I have dedicated hours and hours of my life to getting trained and certified in coaching and neurosomatic intelligence. God has put such a calling on my heart to help other moms struggling with all the things I did and do. feeling overwhelmed, compulsion to do it all, that deep-seated desire to achieve and perform, the need to make everyone happy, feeling like a failure whenever things are a quote-unquote mess, and more than anything, that subconscious belief that there is one right way to do things coupled with the underlying fear that if you get it wrong, you are not worthy or lovable. It runs so deep, and as I now understand, it's the result of all these traumatic wounds we acquired early in life, whether that's big T traumatic events or little t complex trauma from less-than-ideal relationships with our caregivers. If you have listened to this podcast before, you know that I love diving deep on each and every one of these things because I see it in other clients all the time and again have wrestled with it so much myself. So we will get back to those deeper things in future episodes. I am really on a mission to call them out and help you understand how everything, everything you do today, especially in your marriage and parenting, is a reflection of the way your brain got wired to perceive the world from a young age. The great news is that you are never stuck, and there is so much you can do to rewire your brain for greater safety and capacity so you can then really overcome your struggles and show up as the ideal wife and mom you dream of being. That's what I am all about. My Mom's Making Time Society is just one dimension of that and is the most accessible way to coach with me because it is so much more affordable than working together one-to-one. On top of that, there are so many tangible resources included. It literally pays you back for participating in our tracking challenge where you are held accountable on your goals. And everyone's favorite part is the incredible community of amazing, like-minded mamas who are all there supporting and encouraging each other. Our virtual group is purposely housed off social media for real, deep connection, even though it is still online, and we have members all over the world. I am obviously biased, but I have never seen anything else like my mom's making time society, and I purposely created it to be the solution for so many of the things I see plaguing moms all the time. Existing members have such awesome things to say about it, and I was excited to recruit new members to keep expanding our group even more. I sent numerous emails to my email list, hosted a bunch on Instagram, and advertised it here on this podcast, as you may have heard. Now, I know better than anyone that none of this is about the numbers. I learned that the hard way years ago, trying to get monetized on YouTube. And God has really convicted me that sharing everything I have learned, both the hard way and through my years of academic research, is never about being huge or famous. It is about connecting with the right women who really need what God has called me to provide. I am also so mindful that each and every member is an actual person. And I am so grateful for the chance to know and support you personally. So don't ever take this the wrong way. This episode isn't a rant or a pity party or a why didn't you buy complaint meant to make you feel bad that you didn't join. Absolutely not. I promise there is a bigger point coming. But here is the kicker. Out of a two-week open enrollment period, only three women signed up. Again, that is three amazing new members who are truly a perfect fit. I am so thrilled to have them. But that turned out to be a 0.015 conversion rate, meaning just 1 and 1⁄2 people out of every 1,000 signed up. Up until now, industry standards said a good conversion rate was between 2% and 5%, and mine have always been closer to 10% to 50%. So you can see how a 0.015% conversion rate seemed really strange. I have spent the last several days racking my brain for how to explain it. And while there are undoubtedly things that I could have done better, like being clearer about the value and benefits you get out of joining, or pay for ads to get my offer in front of new people, which, for the record, I have never done. Everything I do is real, organic, and word-of-mouth marketing. I could have had a better free bonus to make joining a no-brainer or had a much shorter open enrollment window of just 3-5 days to boost urgency. Maybe things like that would have made a difference. I am brainstorming all kinds of ideas for the future and as easy as it is to feel disappointed in the results of this current launch, I ultimately am choosing to just get curious because I know I'm not a special snowflake or the only one experiencing these kinds of challenges. In fact, I have spoken to several business colleagues that are going through the same thing, which really signals something deeper is going on. There are two bigger things I see going on that aren't at all in my direct control. and really speak a lot to what we as moms are dealing with. The first thing, the first thing is timing. I had thought that by mid-September, moms would have adjusted to their kids being back in school and start wanting to turn their attention to themselves and their goals. But even in my own experience, this year felt different. I mentioned in episode 26 that I was feeling pretty drained, not driven, as I thought about this upcoming fourth quarter and finishing the year strong. We moms are juggling so much, and I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling like things are not slowing down like they used to. I don't know if you've seen that meme going around that says, now that I'm an adult, I can indeed confirm if it's not one thing, it's another. That makes me chuckle so hard because it's so true. It's not just little things going on either. I have sure experienced a bunch of big, hard, emotional challenges that feel like they have been back to back to back since the pandemic started in March of 2020. On top of there being a lot going on, I obviously couldn't have anticipated Charlie Kirk's assassination or another horrific school shooting happening. There are constantly so many awful things in the news, and they understandably dominate our attention. whether that's through traditional media outlets or social media. It became clear that in the midst of those big events, people weren't seeing or receiving my messages about the doors to the Moms Making Time Society being open because their news feeds were feeding them more quote-unquote relevant posts about these current events. And even if you did hear about my program, I understand you had more on your mind in that moment. I get it. We are all trying to navigate it the best we can, basing our decisions on whatever feels most urgent and important in that moment. It's natural that big personal or even national things dictate what that is. The second thing I see going on that is definitely outside my control but I think really played into my results this launch is information overload. We are all so collectively overwhelmed literally pulled in a million different directions. I don't think it's any coincidence that more people than ever are being diagnosed with ADHD. And that's not to belittle you if you are. Like, I've got the same kinds of tendencies, even though I don't have the official diagnosis. And ADHD or any other type of neurodivergence doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It means your brain operates differently, right? That you have special gifts and a different way of filtering or processing information. I just saw a new statistic that said the average person sees 10,000 advertisements per day. OK? 10,000 advertisements per day, flooding you with information and opportunities. I also recently just gave a training all about decision fatigue, where I pointed to recent research that finds the average person makes over 35,000 decisions a day. It's no wonder we get overwhelmed and exhausted. Your brain is literally being asked to do what no one in history has ever been expected to. At no point in time were humans so incessantly bombarded by information that the brain has to take in, process, and then decide and act upon. It's too much. especially when you factor in what I just got discussing in the prior two episodes, how all of human behavior is motivated by dopamine, that pleasure hormone that makes you feel rewarded when something good and exciting happens, and oxytocin, which is the bonding hormone that makes you feel close and connected to other people. Like, it makes a lot of sense that we are all engaging in actions that give us the biggest hits of those two hormones. We turn to social media because deep down we're feeling sad or lonely and craving connection even though the online world only gives us a one-sided superficial version of it. We love checking email or news or social media because we get a dopamine hit from the anticipation of something new and exciting. And as mentioned in episode 27, that hit from anticipation is way greater than the pleasure of actually getting the thing itself, which keeps you on the constant hamster wheel, scrolling for the next new, more exciting thing. When you're bombarded by so much information, the brain literally just shuts down. It can't function. It can't decide. And it's so stressful that you want an escape. So you get the emails, but you don't open them. Or you open them, but you're not really reading them. Or maybe you even read them, but you're not at a place where you can decide in that moment, and so you soon forget all about it because you're getting hundreds of emails and other messages a day. This analysis paralysis is a real thing. Having our phones with us 24-7 has made us addicted to what's new and shiny. I will totally out myself here, but I know you do it too. I have a horrible tendency of picking up my phone when I'm stopped at a red light and refreshing my email to see if I got anything great. But whether I did or not, the light soon turns green. And so more often than not, I forget to come back and actually read. let alone take advantage of whatever that great thing was. You probably do this too when you're waiting in the school pickup line, or at a doctor's office, or at night after you've battled your kids to do their chores. Your brain is always looking for something better and more pleasurable than what's right in front of you. We have that horrible tendency. to turn to our phones in an attempt to make us feel better whenever we're facing any kind of discomfort, whether that's a tense situation with your spouse, or your kids giving you an attitude, or simply being exhausted after a long day of work and chores. We are living in a day and age where we are objectively living a better quality of life than ever before, and yet we feel so unsettled. So we're always looking to our phones to make us feel better, but then there is so much information on them that your brain doesn't want to do the hard work of actually processing that information, right? You just want something that is new, easy, and more fun than what you are currently experiencing. The cumulative weight of this is incredible. Not in a good way. At the time of this recording, I am ashamed to admit that I have 6,811 unread emails And that's across over six different email accounts. I've got one for my university, two for my business, one main personal one, a couple of other junk personal emails, and then some old email accounts that I just don't even check anymore. I have Looks like 55 unread voicemails, four unread texts. I'm part of a mom chat for my kids' school. And last year, I had to purposely turn off notifications because in just one day alone, there were over three hundred messages that came through while I was at work. And I knew I just couldn't keep up. Even just seeing that little red bubble with the number stressed me out. What's crazy is that I am only on one social media platform, Instagram. And I can only imagine if you're someone who uses Facebook and TikTok and X or Snapchat and LinkedIn or whatever else there is, right? Like how many more messages are coming at you? I also have 41,151 items stored in my photos. I have used 497 of my iPhone's 512 gigs of storage. My husband and I just caved and ordered new iPhone 17s in part because they now go up to 2 terabytes of storage. I know it's crazy, but I have to think you can relate. Of those 41,000 plus items, 3,584 are videos, over another 10,000 are special photos I have taken of my kids. Comedian Jim Gaffigan had a joke several years ago about how he has more pictures of his kids on his phone than his dad even looked at him. And it's so true! On top of that, I take like 10 pictures of everything in the moment and then never delete the extras because even the bad ones feel special and memorable. One of my favorite things to do, especially late at night, when I'm feeling sad or sentimental is scroll back through all these past photos of my kids, reminding myself of these precious moments and searching for evidence of all my attempts to be a good mom. These photos bring up so much emotion because they show how much my kids have grown and I can't go back in time or get those precious moments back. But then it motivates me to be more present and make more intentional memories moving forward. So I don't want to delete the photos off my phone. I want to keep them. as my special keepsake album that is always within hand's reach. Then I also have countless screenshots of things I didn't want to forget and sometimes I use my iPhone's search feature to find those things again. but there are undoubtedly so many things I screenshotted and legit never looked at again. Nor will I, so, you know, in retrospect I could or should delete them, but who's got time for that? Anyway, I wanted to share all of this as evidence of how much even I, a self-professed productivity expert and certified life coach, struggle with information overload And if I struggle, I know there's a really good chance you do too. My intention is in no way to shame or criticize you, only to point out my observations so you can decide for yourself if it feels like a problem and, if so, what you want to do about it. No matter how much we want to, we literally can't catch up. And that feels horrible to your brain, especially if you're wired to be a type A, high-achieving perfectionist like me. I have had enough. There is so much noise, so little real connection. Such a lack of peace of mind. No wonder when we are bombarded by incessant demands and opportunities vying for our attention. Ironically, I started my business, Solutions for Simplicity, in 2019. with the aim of helping you live a simpler, more peaceful, and productive life. Yet my life has only gotten exponentially more complicated since then, not just because of running my business on top of working full time at my university and being a mom of four young kids, but because the world has gotten infinitely more complicated in that time. I am really, really craving simplicity again. I'm curious if you agree or disagree. I think our lives have become way too cluttered and it's up to us to intentionally step back to re-evaluate what does and doesn't belong in them. I could always be better, but I am quite mindful of my kids' mental health. and wanting their lives to be simple and real with limited technology use. Yet I am ashamed to admit what has happened in my own mind after I finally caved and got my first smartphone in 2015. It's not good. We have got to declutter, and not just our things, but our time and our minds. The world clearly isn't going to do that for us. It's just getting worse and worse, faster and faster, more unreal and demanding. We have to purposely choose what deserves our precious attention and then do whatever it takes to block out the noise threatening our peace. I sincerely hope my content never feels like noise to you. And I'm so honored you tune in when there is so much else vying for your time. I really would love to connect more. A real, deep connection. I've been thinking hard about how to cultivate more opportunities for that and how to lead more in-person events or live virtual trainings so we can get together in real time and see each other. It pains me that life feels more lonely than ever and that so many moms are struggling but yet think they are the only ones or don't know where to turn. Maybe worse, and I even went through a phase of this myself. It seems like a lot of moms are just checking out. It's like they're apathetic and just don't care anymore. Like we've just come to accept that this is the way it is. And honestly, it does feel good, right? It feels so good to get the dopamine hits of new emails and DMs and shiny objects. But if you are fed up, with superficial, artificial relationships, and beyond tired of the noise coming at you non-stop in this fast-paced, high-tech day and age, I really am here for you. Do not miss next week's episode where I will be interviewing a highly popular simplicity expert on why and how to declutter your life in both the physical and digital sense so you have more peace in your mind and your home. She shares so many truth bombs and practical tips for simplifying your life. Do not miss it. In the meantime, your homework for this episode is to do a quick life audit. On a scale of 0, meaning not at all, and 10, meaning very, How content do you feel with your current life? To what extent do you find yourself chasing dopamine? How would you rate the level of connection in your current relationships? With your spouse, your kids, your friends, are you feeling a pull to change and improve any of that? If so, how? As always, I would be honored if you would share your thoughts with me via email or at Solutions for Simplicity on Instagram. No matter what, remember nothing you do changes how wonderful and worthy you are. Have a great day and don't forget to join me back next Tuesday for this powerful interview with the first ever guest on the More Time for Mom podcast. See you then.