Rather Be Rotting
Rather Be Rotting is the ultimate escape for pop culture obsessives and reality TV junkies. Hosted by two sisters who’d always rather be rotting on the couch, this show is a love letter to Bravo marathons, niche celebrity drama, and the kind of useless-but-essential pop culture knowledge that clogs their brains (and now, your ears). Whether they’re deep-diving into reality TV chaos or spiraling over a red carpet moment, these two are here to talk about everything that doesn't matter—but means everything to them.
Rather Be Rotting
15 - Love is Blind UK, RHOM, RHOC, Big Brother, and 90 Day HEA
The gals are back at it discussing the currently airing shows (Real Housewives of Miami, Real Housewives of Orange County, Big Brother, and 90 Day Happily Ever After). They also get into lower blephs (how much do they cost, really?), whether or not contouring is still in, baby bumps, and the age old question of how many Taylor Swift vinyls is too many?
Welcome to Rather Be Rotting, where two sisters who should really be doing something more productive dissect all things reality, TV, and pop culture chaos, because no matter what's going on in life, we would always rather be rotting. Madeline. Hi, Lil. How are you? Super. How are you? Good. I have something special today. What is it? An OCCCZ. Oh, I didn't know those existed. Orange Cream Coke Zero. How is it? It's not as good as Cherry Coke Zero, I have to say. I don't know that orange and Coke... Millie, stop. No. She has a pen in her mouth. She's like trying to walk away. with this fuzzy pen in her mouth cute she thinks it's a toy that's like a legally blonde pen not a toy you're getting down now goodbye bye mill well i'm happy for you i have um water i literally just told you it wasn't as good as coke zero and you cherry and you still said you're happy for me That's how good of a sister I am. We're listening. No, I was sad for me that I don't have my drink of choice. You didn't say it was bad. You just said it wasn't as good. Yeah, that's bad. Anyway. So it's bad. It's just not as good. Okay, well. Moving on. So I was just washing my hands and I looked in the mirror and I noticed something. I think it's time for a lower bluff. No. I have these bag roll things. Everybody has those. I'll show you when I see you next weekend. We can compare. I definitely have those. So are you going to get one? We can get matching. I cannot afford a lower bluff. They're actually not that expensive. How much? Off the top, I can't remember, but I think it's like under$2,000. Maybe even under$2,000, I would say. Okay. I'm saving my money for a breast lift and reduction post my second child. You should be saving money for your children's college educations. I think that we'll get there. And private school because your husband's so bougie. There's a reason we moved to New Jersey and one of them is that public schools are so good we don't need to send them to private. I'm telling you, it's a lot easier to be at the top of your class. when you're not at a good school. Take it from me. Private school's not in the cards. I'm just saying, like, you guys should move to an area where the schools aren't great so your kid can be the best. I don't know if that makes a difference over a solid education. I mean, look at me! Look at you. Oh my god, you're such a bitch. Um... Another debate that we had right before we took to the mic was about contouring. You informed me that contouring is out. What do I know? I don't know anything. Well, I consulted a few others. Okay. Just a few that responded to me before this recording. And? I think bronzer is in still, but contouring is not, which did confuse me. So I was right. But, well, yes. Yes. But I think you still do like the lines with the bronzer, right? You just don't make it look like shadows as much. It's more just like blundy. I guess. I don't really, I don't know. I guess I'm talking to the wrong person here. You are. My routine doesn't consist of any of those things. I don't know why I chose August of 2025 to take this on. I'm not really sure either. But, you know, it spoke to me. It was something I was going to practice today. Now I'm not sure if I will. Sorry to ruin your wild Friday plans. Thanks. Of practicing contouring. Maybe I can do it tomorrow. Maybe. What's new with you? Anything interesting? In general, I'm just incredibly annoyed with... Taylor and her countdowns these goddamn countdowns stop doing countdowns to release vinyls like this is why when they were gonna announce when she was like doing the the buzz to announce the album I thought it was a merch draw this is why because she does this shit 90% of the time and I'm in a work slack and everybody's always like another countdown another countdown and I'm like literally who gives a shit it's a vinyl truly like I've stopped even looking and She's like the girl who cried wolf. Yeah. When she's ready to drop something interesting, no one's going to believe her. There will always be those who clown. And at least 99% of the time, you're one of them. I would say that that is dropping to like 90%. I wonder if that's how it is. I wonder if she's losing people like the super Swifties. I don't think so because there are some people, actually multiple people in my work Slack that are like, I bought the purple one. I bought the green one. And I'm like, Wait a minute, you people are buying this? Hold on. Most people are getting paid way too much at your company. I was shook. They should donate to, like, World Hunger. I was shooketh. One girl was like, I bought this one, but I really ain't considering also getting this one. I'm like, you're gonna buy two? Guess how many I'm gonna buy. Well, you know, you could buy one if you really like the album because you do have a record player. I don't buy them. You have them bought for you. Yes. If someone gives it to me as a gift, I will happily accept and listen to it. But yeah, I will not seek that out. I definitely won't buy any because I don't have a means to play vinyl or CD. Actually, I'd like to amend that statement. If this album is the best... The Breast of the Breast, then I will buy the album. Okay. Like Midnight's, my favorite thus far. I mean, I had to get that one. It was still a gift, but I mean, I would have bought it. I remember helping pick that out and you said we picked the wrong version. But then I changed my mind. Oh my God. I'm glad that I got the purest one. Okay. So there's not a lot of pop culture, but there is a lot going on in the TV world. You want to start with Love is Blind UK because it's fresh off the dome? It really is. I literally finished it minutes ago. So we're both fully caught up. And I have so many thoughts. Okay, let's hear them. Where do you want to start? How do you pronounce his name? Javen or Javen? How do you pronounce, is it Demola or Demola? I think it's Demola. Most people say Demola. But some people say Demola. I think those people are wrong. Okay, so we got one. Now, I think it's Javen. Okay, I do too. He's a piece of shit. So you think he's a lying liar who lies? Yes, absolutely, I do. She should have picked Demelal, just like I said. He was so cute in his matching set when he went to meet her, and he was so classy and sweet, and he gave her a nice hug. And then she just, like, left him there with his unfinished drink. Like, you couldn't just sit there while he finished his drink. I have six words for Jeven. Methinks doth protest too much. When he went to meet with beautiful Meg to combat everything that she said, it was all like... Is semantics the right word for my pea brain? It was all semantics. Like... was there was there not a curtain on the photo booth it doesn't matter it was weird why are you a girl in there and he's like we were arguing why would you argue in a photo booth where you have to sit literally like on each other's laps to fit it was so clear that this man cares so much more about being portrayed in a certain way to the public or like being looked at as a liar than being his ex-fiance's actual feelings which if you rewind the clock two weeks i knew he was not trustworthy well yeah i mean he he said in one of the episodes from this latest dump that he still doesn't love her how could you get engaged to somebody you don't love well meg didn't say i love you before she got engaged luckily we got there thank god because those two are a love story for our time Oh, my God. Anyway, we'll talk about them in a minute. I think Katisha is the most, her face is the most stunning face. Like, she should be a model. So beautiful. So beautiful. I don't think he, I don't think he cares. Like, I don't think he ever intended to marry her. That was like very clear from when they were on the trip, you know, at the beginning. I just, you know, and like, it was so clear to the viewers when they were at the mixer, the way he was talking to Sophie, like. Yeah. He had no interest in trying to remain married. faithful to katisha for anyone or anyone really or anyone wants to settle down at all he does not so do we think katisha will go back to demola no i don't i don't i don't think she i don't think she felt felt it like that for him damn yeah the other question is if there's this he said she said between meg and Javen, why don't they go to another source? Let's contact Innu. Let's contact Yolanda. Let's contact Sophie. Yeah, maybe they will, eventually. It's funny how his only person to back him up was the splenic wonder that is Patrick. Oh my god. What did they say? They said something about you're not as... I forget what their insult to him was. I can't remember either. But I thought it was, I thought, speaking of Patrick, I thought it was so funny when Anu was like, what's on your head? Why are you wearing that scarf on your head? And he's like, I thought it would be a good look. And she's like, well, it's not. I loved it. I loved her eating, like, ripping him to shreds. It was so good. What a doof. He is a doof. I wonder where his spleen has led him now. Like, where is he today? It's a great question. I'm sure we'll find out at the multi-part reunion. Yeah, I was glad to see them again. That confrontation was good. Who's next? I think the least... The couple who's kind of like just smooth sailing, giving me the least to worry about is Jed and Bada. Oh, I forgot about that. They're just like... They're just like a perfect fit. You look at them and you're like, yep. And then they've met each other's family and it's like, yep. And they just live in their best life. I just like don't think he's attractive, but there's a lid for every pot. I don't think he's attractive either. I just think they seem like a good fit. They do. Yeah. Because they just really love each other. Just like Meg and what's his face? Kieran. I love them. They're going to have really attractive children. Man, there was, like, one camera shot. Like, you know how they, like, take their own videos, which I love? Like, honestly, I want to buy a camera and just start, like, videotaping my life because it's, like, such good memories, you know? Like in the good old days when people would do it with a video camera? Yeah, I mean, like, you can do it with your phone. I guess that's what most people do. What am I talking about? I feel like it might be funner to do it with like an old fashioned camera because then it also doesn't take up all the space on your phone. Yeah, that's really what it is. Like I spend so much time deleting pictures. Yeah. Like my phone is never not storage almost full. We notice. So... Yeah, that would be nice. But there was one video that I just think about all the time. It, like, lives right in my brain. He opens the closet, and she's in her bathing suit, like, laying on her stomach with her legs folded over, like, by her butt, like, on the top shelf of the closet. And I was like, this beautiful goddess, you know, acrobat dancer can fit on the top shelf of a hotel closet. I was so impressed. I missed that. It was... He opened the closet. He was taking the video with his handheld, opens the closet, and she's just laughing. I would never trust myself climbing up on a shelf. I would assume it would break immediately. Yeah, I mean, the shelf could hold her easily because she's just a little thing. She's just a cute little ginge, and I just want to be her. Me too. And he's so sweet to her. He's like, I can't believe I get to go to bed with this every night. I know. They're a love story for our time. They're everything to us. The one couple that honestly kind of surprises me still is Cal and Sarover. Me too. It's like they're saying all the right words, but for some reason I'm not buying it. Yeah, I agree. It's weird. It went well with her mom after all those crazy texts her mom was sending her. When that meeting actually went well, I was shocked. Me too. And I think that it probably wasn't even going as bad at first as editing was making it out to me. They made it look like he was floundering. yeah but like i don't think that that's true you know what i mean like if you add music and you edit in more pauses you can you can pretty much do anything you can um but yeah because like when he asked when she asked like what makes my daughter unique like and made you want to marry her he's like well um her posh southern accent and we both love fitness and i was like yikes yikes we're in for trouble but he must have said more i'm sure he did And speaking of makeup, like, being out, I'm obviously not one to talk, because I know nothing. But the dark eyeliner under on her, like, I don't think that's in anymore. I think it's gotta go. No, I don't think it's working, and I think she needs to change her eyebrow shape, too. To what? Like, something a little more square? A little straighter, I think. Straighter, yeah, that's what I meant. Yeah, I just feel like that smoky eye, maybe for, like, a night out, but, like, she rocked it in her bathing suit, like, in the house, like, You know what I mean? All the time. I think it's... And her eyes are too big for it. It's just... Yeah. It just looks dated. It looks like she's a beautiful girl from, like, 2005. Yeah. Like, we all did it. I think a few subtle makeup tweaks would do very well for her. Me too. And if I can tell, then you know that you'll need it. Yeah. It's the moral of the story. Yeah. So then the biggest surprise of all was Ashley and Billy. Billy, what is happening? Billy, Billy, Billy. Why is he doing this to that sweet girl? You should never trust a man with a Michael Buble tattoo. That's true. That grocery store scene was very uncomfy. That was... yikes i wanted to like leave my skin i just was filled so the whole time i was watching it i'm like this dude needs to realize this is this is a him thing like most people do not eat that strict and you cannot require like this is my biggest pet peeve because or one of them because my husband sort of does the same thing like he's nowhere near billy's level of um not even close but like I'll want something and he'll be like oh don't buy that or don't make that because I have no self control eat the whole thing I'm like so I don't get to have it because you can't control yourself like that is wrong you know and so if he's gonna tell her like don't buy anything you like and basically you have to eat this strict regimen with me or else I can't control myself she that's not what she wants for her life No, it shouldn't have to be. And I'm on the other side of the coin. I'm the one with no self control. So when my boyfriend buys Cocoa Pebbles every week, you know, at eight o'clock at night, you know, I get possessed, a force possesses me and I eat the Cocoa Pebbles and I'm working on that. But I would never make him... Not, you know, you can't buy this because I am possessed by a demon. Yeah, let him enjoy his pet. Everybody that has struggles with their lack of self-control should just get some hypnotherapy and call it a day. Okay, I'll try that next. I feel like you're talking directly to me. You, my husband, Billy, go
SPEAKER_01:hypnotize yourself.
SPEAKER_00:My therapist suggested locking the cereal cabinet. People do that with alcohol, so, you know. I'm not, I'm not against it. Cause I honestly like, it's like every, every night when I do it, I'm like, oh, tomorrow I won't. Like this will be the last time. Like of all cereals though, Cocoa Pebbles, that's not, that's not like a must devour for me. Did you hear her when she jumped up here? I did. So here's the thing, though. It doesn't matter. Cocoa Pebbles was just what came to mind because it's what's in the cabinet now. It could be Apple Jacks. It could be Fruit Loops. It could be Frosted Flakes. It could be Special K. It could be Cheerios. Cheerios? I'm going to eat it. Literally anything. And it's like, don't even get me started, like, if there's chocolate-covered raisins in the house. Like, they're only going to be in the house for one fucking night because I am a monster. I support you. I get it. But I think Billy was a little too harsh. Short story long, you should never make your problems like that your partner's problems. And he will never find a girl who's like that. God, no. I mean, maybe he would. Unless he's with somebody else in the army, but wasn't he prior and that didn't work out? Yeah. Why is he so against cabin crew? Because then they're not going to see each other as much. okay well you want to like see your partner i think right i mean i would what's his schedule i don't know i mean i think that he i don't know actually i'm just like confused if she works two or three days and then she's off like four days what is the problem i don't it must be more difficult than that Because also she said she would get another job if they got married. She said that. Yeah, that's the thing. And it's like she seems committed to making this work. And he tells her all the time that he wants to make it work too. Like even with the food thing, he's like, if it's really important to you, I'll make it work. And yet, when they're in the water or after their day jumping in the water, he says he's 50-50 and just like totally... shocks this poor girl. Like she said, I'm going to be sick. I thought that was awful because he's never indicated as like, as well from what we've seen. And I'm guessing what has happened that he's 50, 50. No, I was, I was shocked when he said that, that poor girl. I know. And she's so nice. She's so nice. What I was wondering too, also to also what I was wondering is, um, Is that like a thing people do in Ireland? Because we were recently, well, not really recently, but we watched the series Bad Sisters on Apple TV. Yes, and we went to 40 foot. They swim in the cold water regularly and then have the big puffy jackets after. Is this like a thing they do in Ireland? Maybe. I don't think I could do it. Oh, God, no. It's like a polar plunge. I'm not a cold plunge kind of person. Like when we were in Mexico, we did a day at the spa and they do like a, water thing where you're in a sauna, then you get in a cold plunge and then a room temperature plunge and then a hot tub. I could not dunk all the way in a cold plunge. I was in it for maybe five seconds. I was like, that's enough. Can't and won't. It's not for me. Another thing that, like, I'd like to tell Netflix is if the family visits are drama-free, why don't you just, like, tell us in, like, a voiceover or, like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't need to see the family visits if there's no drama. You know what? I'll see it, but make it short. Yeah. Okay. Give me a minute. Like, Barda and what's-his-face? A minute. Because I'd like to put names to faces and all that stuff. I guess. But make it quick. Like, seeing Cal's family was really interesting.
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:they were interesting i like his nan though oh my god me too she seems like a fun nan his mom seems very nice too i mean she seems nice just there's not a lot of uh energy yeah happening yeah she seemed like she was happy for them and supportive but yeah she just isn't the most enthusiastic she seems like she popped a beta blocker perhaps or xanax prior to that meeting well not everyone's comfortable being on camera like honestly i should have popped a xanax before i walked down the aisle at your wedding you really should have god damn like i didn't think about it can we go back i'm not doing that again can you imagine my speech if i like i'd be like tamra judge with my xanax and my joy oh my god No, I don't need to redo a wedding, but it's funny because now we're planning the baby shower and that feels like wedding 2.0 a little bit. I know, but it's exciting. Who knew that you have to book your baby shower stuff months and months in advance as well? You only have to do that if it's happening during the holidays. I don't know that that's necessarily true. I think it is. I don't know. We'll never know. So are we missing any couples? No, but we did get scenes. We did get scenes. Looks like Sarova and Kel are not going to make it. Why? Why? There was a shot of her like leaning down from the altar crying and hugging her mom. I don't want to read too far into it because I feel like it could be fake outs. Like I hope so. It could just be her seeing her mom for the first time. Because there was also a blonde sobbing into a mom's arms. Which I think was, I think it was Barda. I think it was Barda, too. But I would be, like, shocked if they don't get married. Me, too. I'd be shocked if any of these people don't get married. It could have been Billie's girl. That would make more sense, but I don't know why. Like, the back of that head looked like the back of Barda's head over what's-her-face's. I would just be, I'll be devastated if any of these couples don't get married. well we know megan kieran well even though kieran's behavior around sophie was or the way he talked about her made me a little uncomfy too then you compare it to jevin and it's like he's i know i know maybe that's just how guys are around each other i don't know i'd have to inquire but the fact that she even loves his nerdy video games and his she's like his crazy jacket yeah she's like it's great that he has a passion that he monetized on and that's right yeah Like, you know, I wish we could monetize on shit about this. This podcast. Hello, Fresh. Yeah, one day we could monetize. That'd be great. Nutrafol. Quince. I love my summer linens from Quince. Oh, my God. That's so funny. No, I tried to order Quince once and the order never came. So if you want to make it right, Quince, hurry up. I have several linen dresses from Quince. They're all three of the same dresses in different colors, white, navy, and black. Oh, that's not the green one that you got? No, it's my Hunger Games dress. I have it in three variations. Can you wear that with a bump? Yep, it's a bump-friendly dress. Yay! I've been wearing them a lot. Has anyone commented on your bump? Yes. Who? So a few, two weeks ago, we went to brunch at my in-laws house and my husband's grandma was there. And the first thing she said when she saw me was you have a little bump. What were you wearing? A dress. And then has anyone from work said anything? Yes. So I was on a zoom call with a girl who lives in Texas and then another girl who lives here and she works in the New York office with me. We're pretty close. And, um, The girl from Texas is going on maternity leave soon. The three of us were catching up and she said, do you have a little bump yet? And my coworker goes, she does. It's just like a very small, I'm guessing. I'm just jealous because I wanted to see this bump like once a week. Like I want the best view of this baby growing and your lips so far from me. Like by the time I see you. You'll see it a week from today. Yeah, but you're... gonna be bigger a week bigger what's funny is like i feel like it's gotten a little smaller in the last week and i don't know if that is because i i moved from first trimester to second and like some of the bloating has gone away maybe um but it's definitely that bump wasn't all baby well some of it is because there's definitely a little bump but it's not like as big all the time but like it's still morning versus night very different yeah i got to see it in the morning and it's purest form Yeah. I'll wake you up bright and early on Saturday. We'll see if we can squeeze it into a bathing suit. Yes! That's gonna be the challenge. Well, I got a dress from Skims. You know how Skims has the, like, really soft, really popular, like, bodycon long-sleeve, long dresses that are, like, comfy? No, that sounds like something, like, Mormons would wear. No, here. It's... Hold on. That room is so cute. And it's all going to change. Yeah, that looks, that's in right now. Yeah, definitely. That looks atrocious. No, it's very popular. Yeah, so are baggy jeans. And I don't like those either, but I still wear them. It's also really comfy. But my point is, when I tried it on, I was like, oh my God, baby belly. And that's saying a lot because it's like your boobs already force your shirts to stick out. A certain amount. So like once the bump is bigger than the boobs, then it's going to be like really real. We're almost there. I know. Anyway, nobody cares about this. Shall we talk about Big Brother? Yes. Mickey, Mickey, Mickey. Rachel, Rachel, Rachel and her outfits. Love the outfits.
UNKNOWN:Yes.
SPEAKER_00:They're insane! That green cape situation. The red dress that had, like, the sheer parts. The structural cape-esque situation, yeah. The sheer one was wild. And then she had another red one that was completely bedazzled and the shoulders were, like, sculptural. How the hell did she pack? Someone needs to ask her. I'm sure if she gets evicted, we can submit that question. That will be, like, one of my biggest questions. Yeah. The outfits, and where does she get them? Are they all vintage? Did a stylist pull all these for her? The fact that she has no shame and she'll just wear that sheer-ass dress sitting on her bed talking to people. I love it. It's insane. But yeah, I mean, the fact that she does it so confidently. She's giving us something to look at, which is great. Yeah, because you know who wasn't giving us anything to look at? Riley. Riley. I have so many issues here because I know what's going on in the live feeds. I did some research. And? And I just, yeah, I saw how creepy he is. How, like, controlling. So do you think she's brainwashed? Yeah. Or, like, scared of him? Yeah. Why did she cry so much when he left? She should be relieved. That's why I think she's brainwashed. Or do you think she was crying out of relief? I'm really, I don't know. I'm not sure. But, like, apparently he also has a criminal record. yeah like drinking and driving not like anything like you know I mean that's not good but it's not like assaulting people stalking which is like what I would expect from him I just think like it's so the edit they gave him was crazy in comparison to like what's actually happening why aren't they showing that why why did they go so easy on him in the edit like it's just bizarre why wasn't he removed it's just crazy so I'm glad he's gone me too and he wasn't he wasn't hot no i'm sorry he was not the catherine is beautiful like how could she look into those eyes look at that face i'm sorry that's like so mean but like his personality is one thing but it's like if you're hot and controlling like i could see you know how he could brainwash her but how does this man have the power to brainwash her I'm not sure. I mean, the only good thing about Mickey winning the blockbuster is that Riley went home because otherwise... Which brings us back to Mickey. That girl's driving me insane. When she looks at Lauren during the veto competition and is like, let somebody else win. I'm sorry. You can fuck off. And then, like, she was so mad at Rachel for putting her up. And it's like, this is a game. Like, remember how Riley... He was so mad at her and she kept having to tell him it's a game. It's a game. She was doing the same thing to Rachel. And on top of it all, you literally were gunning for her. She had a perfect reason to put you up and you know it. Yeah. Yeah. She's nuts. She's got to go. I'm sick of her. Yeah, me too. She's too big for her britches. She is. My favorite part of the week was when Will, they showed that clip of Morgan talking to Will and he was just like, I can't with any of these conversations because that would be me. Me too. I was just thinking like the whole time I was watching that, I'm like, that would be us. Yeah. Just like half, not even half listening. Just repeat. It's so smart. His strategy, repeating things back. We should borrow it. I know. I know. I really like Will. I really like Will. Has your love for Vince gone back? Has it reverted? No. vince vince vince vince is back up to his old tricks i see yeah just running around promising final two deals with anyone who comes in his path and he forgot he made one with kelly that was so funny he's like a spreadsheet but you know what the truth is like i still kind of see him as the egg i wonder why he didn't go home like i'm still like i can't shake it i wonder who he actually wants to have a final two with I think my guess would be maybe Morgan? Morgan was my thought as well, or potentially Lauren, because he could beat her. Oh, yeah. Lauren should be everyone's final two, because that girl. I was shocked that Lauren stood her ground and took Vince off, even though Rachel really tried her damnedest to intimidate her. Yeah, but her wishy-washiness was like, you need to make a decision now. The indecisiveness was really annoying to watch. And then why was everyone shocked that she put Riley up? She didn't have many options. I don't know why. Who would have been a less shocking choice? I don't know. Kelly, maybe? Keanu? Keanu and Rachel are the duo I never knew I needed. Well, I think it's only really real to Keanu. Me too, but I still love to watch it. Yeah. I think they're sweet together. Yeah. Anyway, do you have any other thoughts? Good series of episodes this week. Great series of episodes. I was thoroughly entertained. I thought Rachel had a really solid HOH. Me too. She hopefully woke the house up, shook the house up, and hopefully she doesn't go home next week because of it. Fingers crossed. I think she put herself in a good spot. I think so too. Now we have that new The Judges alliance. Hopefully it's real. Is Mickey in that one? No. Oh, okay, good. I don't think so anyway. You know who I'm loving is little Ashley. She's just so cute. She's really, I was thinking today how she's really come a long way from Showergate. Yeah. And I'm happy for her. Like when she reads her lines in the confessionals, it's like, you know, she does a good job of making it seem natural. Unlike Mickey, the robot, I literally can't stand it. I just can't stand anything about her. It's funny because I liked her at the beginning. Me too, but I've just turned so, so much. She's just too, too big for her britches. She needs to calm down. She needs to get voted out. Yeah, she does. I would like to add that I saw on Reddit today that all of Riley's media interviews today were canceled. I saw that. So... What does that tell you? That they do not want this man on the loose with, you know, in the media? Well, rightfully so. I think he should have to explain himself. They don't want to take that chance. Everyone already knows. The information is out there, despite Big Brother's attempts to edit it out. Facts. Anyway, shall we move on to 90 Day? Yeah, the... Libby really shocked me. Me too. She left. She left Moldova in the middle of the night, in the dark of night. Because Andre brought her and Chuck to his investment property, which was... A pile of rubble? A pile of rubble. What was it supposed to be? Dude, I don't know. And the thing that was crazy is how the whole drive over, he's talking it up and how great it is and blah, blah, blah, just to get them in the backyard and be like, man, I lost all my money. She's like, so it's gone? It was stolen? I think it was, honestly, yeah. It's so crazy. I don't blame her at all. And the fact that he doesn't get why she's so upset is wild to me. The fact that he took her... all the way there and didn't tell her until they were there? Like, what did he think was going to happen? I don't know. And then when she did flee in the middle of the night with the children, he looked at Chuck and he goes, some father-in-law you are. And Chuck was so calm. I gotta give him that. I know, so calm. Like, I would have been, if I were a dad, I would have been like, shut the fuck up. I'm protecting my daughter. You did her dirty. I feel like they didn't seem mad enough. Like, how much do these people make that they're not more upset about 75 grand? She was mad. She literally left. She fled the country. She didn't even say goodbye to his parents. That's true. You're right. That's pretty mad to leave your husband, take the children, and go back to America and leave you behind. I'd say this is grounds for divorce. I mean, if nothing else was. That's how I feel. I feel like they have two kids together, and I think that now his chances of living in Moldova, which, like, now she just has an excuse to never live there. Oh, that's never happening. Yeah, which she didn't want it to anyway, but now it's like... She said that. Yeah. She did say that, but what I'm saying is, like, before this event, I'm sure she had no intention of actually moving there, but she thought she would humor him and go look at houses, and... And now she can just use this as an excuse. Yeah, totally. But yeah, good for her. I knew it. She's got balls, that girl. Loved it. It's funny because you'd expect whoever's with Andre to cower. But it's like she fights back. But it's just interesting. You don't usually see that dynamic in a couple. Yeah. I also really liked watching the storyline this week of Julia and Brandon. Yeah. like her which part did you like exactly well i was entertained i should say because like i was entertained because her mom immediately crazy like harping on her about not having a jacket okay but wouldn't our mom do that too no not to that level and then when julia was feeding her pizza i was like that's really weird what do you mean feeding her did i was i looking down you must have been because the mom said like oh feed me and julia like holds up the pizza and like feed it fed it to her mom that is weird it was super weird and i'm not sure why they didn't just go downstairs and be like can we get a third room yeah i mean like why didn't they figure that out ahead of time yeah that was bizarre like that felt like that could have been resolved in so many ways so easily don't you think that julia and her mom look so much alike They definitely do. And also to the point of the sleeping arrangement, for Brandon to not be like, yeah, of course I'll take the couch because I fucked this up is crazy. But I still don't understand. I mean, I guess I understand why the exes can't share a room. Are you going to share a room with your ex-boyfriend? Sure, why not? A bed? No, not a bed, a room. There was two, well, I don't know, because they've been trying, that point, like, you're going to put one of them on the couch when they've just flown across the world? That's true. Okay, well, I'm glad they finally figured it out. Now, when it comes to Brandon not having learned any Russian, and then it goes back to, like, Juan and Jessica, and Jessica not having learned any Spanish, and I was, like, so judgmental of that, because it means you don't care, like, But then I came, like, I did some self-reflection and I realized that, like, I am the asshole that I have been, like, criticizing because I made a promise to a loved one once that I cared about that I was going to learn a skill to benefit them. And that promise was to you, Lil. It was a promise that I was going to learn how to French braid hair so I could repay you for all the times you have French braided my hair. And did I follow through on that promise? Absolutely not. I don't know that you're capable. My fingers just don't move that way. Because like you have tried and I just don't think you're capable. Like you've watched and honestly like even I've been curling my hair for like 10 years. I just learned the way to do it that like I see. I had to watch so many videos of girls doing it. Like I've been watching videos for years because I've been doing it wrong. Just to learn the 2000s Mary-Kate and Ashley way where half of it's curled and half of it's straight. Correct. And I was pulling it off, but not as... My curls were always just a little wrong and I couldn't figure out why. And, you know, it's because I wasn't doing it the way that the girlies do it on the... I was going to say Instagram reels. Yikes. But I don't think I should say that. But that's the truth. Okay? That's the truth. I don't go on TikTok. Anyway, the point is, like, I'm just not dexterous. I don't think that's as bad of a crime as these bitches not learning any language that their partner speaks. I didn't dedicate the time. Like, would I have ever been able to figure out French braiding? Maybe not. But I sure didn't dedicate enough time to say I gave it a real effort. The language thing is, like, so much more important because it's, like... also more comfortable for them to be able to speak in their language. Yeah. And their families. And their families. It's like, you just kind of suck a little bit for not doing that. That's a good point. Okay, thanks for making me feel better. I'm not as much of an asshole as them. You're welcome. So then they get back to their house and it's like crazy decorated, like, MAGA America world. And Julia thinks that she's about to be murdered by a MAGA serial killer. And there are Brandon's parents hiding in the house uninvited unannounced in the dark at night when everybody's exhausted and Betty of course has a glass of red wine in her hand and I'm like do they think they're sleeping there in their room and we never got the answer she stormed out right at the end Betty did yeah because Julia was rightfully like pissed and was like what are you doing here you really need to tell us if you're coming over what the fuck gives them the right after Julia explicitly said We'll see you another day. Her face is so punchable. I can't. Well, it's Brandon's face with a mullet. Yeah, it does make Brandon's face a little bit harder to look at. That woman is deranged. And her husband is too. Yeah, they both are. What's his name? Ron? Yeah. They are disturbing people. So it'll be interesting to see how the rest of the visit goes with Julia's parents. Darcy and Georgie. Why has Georgie not been back in 15 years? Maybe it's expensive. I don't know. Maybe visa problems. That expensive that you can't save up money for a couple years to go back. Like he missed his sister's wedding and the birth of both her kids. That is crazy. That's crazy. There's really no excuse for that. No. So it was nice to see them reunite. You could tell they were, like, a little emotional about it. Darcy was blubbering in the background. Oh, my God. Darcy, her acting. Her monologue in the hotel room, like, it was really good, I thought. Like, I forget what even started it. Oh, that he was, like, a man of mystery. Yeah. I feel like she was, like, coked out or something because she was running around. She might be. Talking really fast, like, and then all of a sudden she, like, is like, wait. i want to know more about you i want to know you're a man of mystery show me the checks show me the bank accounts and then she goes into her scene and scene you know yeah she might have been but how do you how does she get coke there oh i'm sure you can find it i wouldn't trust it it's revealed that georgie doesn't want to tell her how much he makes because she'll spend it all but like she doesn't have access to his money they have separate accounts yeah so i don't i don't know It's weird that you don't tell your partner when you get promoted and how much you make. That's really weird. But she doesn't think it's weird enough to leave him. I guess not, but I don't know. Would you have done that medieval times jousting situation? I'd rather not. Oh. Would you? If it's what we were doing, I guess. I feel kind of indifferent about jousting. Yeah.
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:um what about Adnan and Tiger Lily when she burns her hand her nails or something and she's like oh I burned my nails he's like that's nothing compared to the heat of hell that you're gonna be in if you don't convert literally this man is crazy and it's like so she go when she went baby shopping with her stepmom and her stepmom's like we're just worried that like you know you're He's going to have you convert and you'll be covering yourself and your hair and blah, blah, blah. And she's like, that would never happen. Fast forward to social media. Now she fully covers her hair. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. That's her choice. If she wants to be that religion, like who are we? That's the thing. Like I actually don't feel sorry for her at all because she's an idiot who married a 23 year old after meeting him for five seconds. Yeah. With a completely different religion. And honestly, I, I see his point. I hate to say it, but, like, he really believes that she will go to hell if she doesn't convert. And he wants her to be with him in the afterlife. Yeah, but he was so shady about the way he went about it because all this time he's been, like, slowly... We see this with every, almost every, like, Muslim man on this show. They just, like, slowly, they start by saying... We saw it on, I don't know, I actually know because you don't watch The Other Way, but we saw it on the last season of The Other Way. Some girl, I forget her name, was in South Africa with this guy, Sonny, who was Muslim. And at first he was like, oh, I don't care if you convert, blah, blah, blah. And then slowly it's like, well, maybe you could think about it. And maybe I really need a Muslim wife and you need to do all the things. And it's like over time, it's like this completely warped from what you said when we first started. We're together. I just think it's wrong. Find a Muslim woman then. Like now she's having a baby and it just probably is more real to him. Like he made a dumb decision as a kid marrying this woman. Yeah, because he was 22. Yeah. And now he's 23. And so he's more reflective. And he has a kid on the way. So he's like, I want my whole family to be in heaven with me. What did he say? I was younger then? Yeah. he was at least 365 days younger he was younger then no i hope i can glean as much wisdom in a year as he did we can only hope so i guess we know what happens with them spoiler alert spoiler alert sorry last and least do you know when jasmine So, why did Natalie need to get an Uber if Gino had a car the whole time there? Because Gino doesn't like to drive women anywhere. Remember, he didn't want to take Jasmine to the gym? Yes. So, that's why. Okay. The whole thing is, like, so... Stupid. It's stupid and his family was inside laughing about it. Michelle's very pleased with herself for creating the drama. She's really pleased. And then Matt going outside to talk to Natalie and Gino was wild. That was weird. What are his motives? Part of me is like he's here for the show but he actually did impregnate her. He did. What's so funny to me is Gino immediately going to. He's ugly. He's ugly. Like a third grader. Yeah. Well, you're ugly. You're ugly. It's like... I really wish I was... Dude, I know you own a mirror. He likes himself, I think.
UNKNOWN:Ugh.
SPEAKER_00:Maybe he doesn't. I wish I would have spent more time with Natalie in the hot tub. Yeah, I wish I had been intimate with Natalie. Intimate in the hot tub. Ugh. He's sick. He's so gross. Just when Natalie was having her meltdown, and she's like, I have two children, one of whom is in the army. It's like, how is that relevant? I wasn't. That was like a little improv. Which is like a prize. Okay, now can we go to Bravo? Yeah. Because I thought the shows were good. Period. Yeah, they were both great. Great episodes. The end. So Miami, I think, is freshest for us. How did Lisa get the notary to approve the divorce so fast? Is that what she was signing? I wasn't really clear on exactly. Did they show her signing something? I'm not really sure what was going on with that. She, like, had to leave the table because some... No, I know, but I'm not sure what exactly was needing to be executed. I might have looked down or something, but I did not see the documents getting notarized. I didn't see the process, but... It was electronic? I don't know. Yeah, because she had to do a webcam, whatever. I trust the process was done, and I mean, Gertie was there, so she, you know, was very helpful. It's Gertie, it's Gertie, it's Gertie, it's Gertie. She makes me laugh so much. Her energy is like, even when she's happy or like consoling someone, it's still with like this frantic energy, like, oh, I see your point and you have every right to feel that way because blah, blah, blah. Yeah. It just cracks me up. I like her. Yeah, I love Gertie. And did you see when she kissed Julia? She opened her mouth. Julia's never not trying to make out with everybody. Well, Gertie seemed like she was into it. Anything to take the to turn the tides of that dinner. I would kiss Julia for sure. I don't need that old for you. Yeah, she has like this confessional look where she has a cape and her boobs are out. And I think like, I would just like to cuddle in that bosom. Yeah, to nestle, you know, it just looks like a nice place to rest. I liked when they were on the tour the next day of historical things and Adriana just like knew everything about everything. I think she's actually very well educated. Like she probably legit knows what she's talking about. She's the expert on everything as they came around her last week. They troll her anyway, but I think like she is legit. I think so too. There's no reason to believe she's not. What did you think of her calling Kiki Ratched? Okay. Adriana started all the drama at that dinner. Yeah. All of it because she went in and said to Lisa that Larsa blocked Marcus. Yeah. After Pinky promising she wouldn't do that. So then Kiki calls her out on it to Lisa immediately. Yeah. And then Adriana calls her ratchet immediately. And then Kiki calls Adriana old immediately. So she finished it. Kiki finished it. Adriana started it. And you know what's funny about the whole thing is Lisa was literally trying to apologize for her behavior. Yeah. When Adriana interrupted her to talk about how she was called old. What did you think about everybody like leaving because they were embarrassed that was so dramatic stephanie but that's the draw i like it though stephanie is so dramatic i'm gonna draw out my private plane plan and if everyone can sit together for this 22 minute flight then we can do it but you know hyperventilating in the car like what is happening like is everyone gonna be okay without drama on this 22 minute flight but this is what i want though this is the petty shit i have an ignorant question what Was the main problem with calling her Ratchet because she's black? I think so. I think so. I think there are different implications. Yeah, I think there are different implications. You call a black woman Ratchet. Yeah, I would consider that. I think that's why they got so upset. And also, Kiki retaliating with old. They are all old. Yeah, but Adriana just called Marisol old two weeks ago. It's not really an insult. It's just a fact. But yeah, I thought it was a great episode because of all that. And like at the end, Mary saw like poor someone else's drink into hers. I'm like, who's that? So good. And then did you see the moment when Gertie was trying to help Adriana with her makeup? I rewound it and watched it again. Yeah. The face that she was making. So funny. Yeah, that dinner, simply put, was a joy to watch. Yeah. Another joy to watch was Orange County. Yes, another dinner that was a joy to watch. So I think I've figured out what happened here. I think I did too. Okay, tell me what your version is. I think the problem is Gretchen. Yeah, Gretchen. Okay, yes. Gretchen is the liar. Gretchen is the liar. But Katie shouldn't have said anything to Kiki Monique either way. Well, no, Katie's... Katie's been lying. She's been stirring shit up. She's been talking to the bloggers. All that is also true, but in this instance... Her problem is not being a pathological liar. Her problem is that she blabbed some shit and Gretchen lied. Yes, because they caught it on camera. Yeah. In the backseat, remember, she's like, well, I did go to the hospital. And then she lied about it the next day. She can't keep it straight. But I can see how it's like a game of telephone where maybe she told Katie she went to the hospital to get checked out. And then Katie turned it into, like, she thought you roofied her. Sure, but then later on Gretchen was like, no, I should have gone to the hospital, but I didn't. Yeah, because she's a liar. And she has Jen lying for her. Yeah. And they're trying to gaslight Katie. But, I mean, it makes sense that they're still lying because they didn't want this to get out. So, of course, they're going to deny it. And Katie's already a liar, so who are they going to believe? Who would you believe? But we're going to get to the truth because Kiki Monique will be sitting down. Thank G, bring her out. Yeah, let's get to the bottom. So what did you think of Tamara being like, nobody reached out to me? When obviously, like they did, she just was in her Xanax alcohol mode and didn't remember. she even said that to her dinner at heather she's like you didn't reach out to me and heather's like no i literally did right after you left but the reason tamra yeah the reason tamra doesn't recall that is because she was like blackout she even said i don't remember much from that night yeah so like maybe check your text records before you accuse people she just loves to be a victim he really does i can't believe her quitting the show was for literally 30 minutes i thought that maybe it was really a couple episodes long But I saw like clips of a flashback of her running down a hallway saying, you'll never see me again. Yep. In Columbia. I can't wait for that because season nine right now of Orange County is literally everything to me. Can I set the scene? Yes. Okay. So it's maybe like 2014 or 13 or something. Heather's having a hoedown. To celebrate the breaking of the ground of her next McMansion. And Shannon, she's yelling at Shannon for being late. Shannon's late because her kid had to go to baseball. They're fighting. Vicky is going. Nikki snoring on people when they talk for too long is incredible. Vicky, she won. What did she win? Like the most. Like the Housewives. The Lifetime Achievement Award. That's it.
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:and boy no one has worked harder for that honestly i don't even think she was working that hard it just comes so natural to her she was born to be a real housewife and like especially since in the beginning when they didn't know what it was like yeah she made it what it is i mean tamra really got the dirtiest and really made the drama i think what it was but Like, Vicky just being herself. Like, she doesn't need to stir up drama to be interesting because just, like, her being her. You know, Tamra's, like, meddling and Tamra's doing a little producing, whereas Vicky just shows up and that's enough. So I really do miss her. And Heather, I mean, Heather is also, I think, an incredible housewife. I haven't seen that much this season. No, I like Heather. What did you think about Shannon being late to the airboat and then Gina kind of having like a meltdown about it? That was weird. Also, why was Shannon wearing high heels? These ladies never know how to dress for the activity. Gina needs to relax. Yeah. But also Shannon being like, I was having an anxiety attack. It's like, shut up. Yeah. But then Gina was like, this is giving me an anxiety attack. I just don't have, like, any sympathy. This is gonna sound terrible, but when somebody's like, I was late because I was having a panic attack or an anxiety attack, my immediate reaction is, no, you weren't. And that's on me, but that's how I feel. What about Emily and her husband getting so real about their, like, problems? You know, their nautic disagreements on how they're raising their kid, right? I really feel for her because you can see she just, like, really wants a partner who's, like, in the emotions with her and he's just, like, not that way. But the fact, like, I get hesitant, like, before I share relationship drama, like, my personal stuff with friends. You know what I mean? Like, the fact that she can share that on camera... For the world to see her problems, like her dirty laundry, that scene was so real. Yeah, I mean, I think probably a lot of couples feel that way about especially parenting because people are just different and they handle situations differently. And I think it's probably reassuring to other couples to know that they're not the only ones who struggle to get on the same page with that kind of stuff. I think what I wish he would do is just like, validate her a little more she just so clearly needs that yeah and maybe when he watches back yeah here's hoping oh my gosh this is so random but did you notice on um love is blind they played the theme song for married at first sight i absolutely did i absolutely did i was like do they not check. Did they not know that that's already been used elsewhere? I could not believe it. I'm like, wait, what show am I watching? I know, that really threw me off. It really threw me off. I felt like we heard more of this song than we've ever heard before. Yeah, definitely. Any other thoughts on Orange County? Nope. I liked it. I liked the airboat that we also went on. We went on it in the rain. We did. You were chowed up. You were jacketed up. Yeah, it was a raincoat, not a poncho. Same difference. We got a photo that is equivalent of Juan in the poncho. You in your jacket with the hood with the headphones over it. It's really too bad this podcast is anonymous because I would love to share that picture broadly.
SPEAKER_01:But I will say like...
SPEAKER_00:It would. But what I will say is... When we got to the restaurant afterward, my hair looked better than everybody's because I had it fully protected by that hood. And guess what? I did not notice anybody's hair at the restaurant. I did. I noticed that all yours hair looked like shit and mine looked great. Well, I'm glad that you had that victory at the lunch table. It all paid off. I'm glad to eat your freaking shrimp and grits with perfect hair. Congrats. Madeline, what else happened on that airboat that day? We saw so many gators, like they came so close. What else happened? I've never seen so many gators. Right, but another thing happened. I did drop my phone in the undercarriage of the, what is it? The murky water. The murky water, but it didn't fall into the swamp. It was in swamp water, make no mistake. It's important to know, it fell into the bottom of the airboat. Airboat, yeah. So the man, the alligator man, kindly fished it out, and there you have it. And it worked, right? Yeah, but you were freaking out, and I was like, there's nothing that can be solved right now, because there's literally an alligator right there. Let's just enjoy looking at the alligator, and then we'll deal with this in a few minutes. Yeah. Well, here's what's important to know. And the reason I was freaking out is because you are one of the reckless individuals that I don't understand who keeps all their important things in their phone, their ID, credit cards, debit cards. It's like you get a case. People do this. They get a case with all their important things with their phone. So if you lose one thing, you've lost everything. And I think that's crazy. And so I'm like, if this phone is never to be retrieved, she doesn't have a phone nor identification. Somehow we would have figured it out. I'm telling you. I mean, I would have gotten on the plane to go home and left you and Louisiana oh it's a couple of phone calls and it's fine I mean I lost my debit card the second we landed in Mexico and that's not a good pattern to have I simply I simply canceled it right there then and there and all was well these are not good patterns to have in the mail and I was no worse for the wear I just as as as one kiki said you're too old I mean, I don't think it's an age thing. I think it's just like a way of life thing. Like I'm just more nonchalant. I don't sweat the small stuff. Once you've lost your ID like seven times, I mean, it takes the worry and the concern away. Same with any card of money. Like the people that stress about losing that stuff, it's material things. It can all be replaced and everyone needs to calm down. That's my lesson. We're just going to have to have different opinions on this. I mean, I think you just need to relax about it. And also, I used to have a thing that disconnected with all my cards and stuff in it, and I would leave it places. So, you know what I don't leave places? My cell phone. So, there you have it. I think we just need to get better at you keeping tabs on your things. Maybe if you carried a purse for once. I would like to say that I would have never lost my phone, but I fear that that's jinxing it. But it's true. You have dropped it in the toilet, though. I've dropped it in the toilet. I have dropped it in the swamp water. Shout out to our friend who fished it out of the toilet for me. She listens sometimes. It was her basseret, whose airboat we were on. Yeah, and she was there when I lost it the first time, and they both were in New Orleans. Oh my god. She's a gap for fishing it out of the toilet. Yeah. luckily and you know what's funny is after it came out of the toilet we went on bourbon street and i asked i handed my phone to some guy and said can you take a picture of us that's so gross i'm gonna throw up and i didn't want him and i would like to publicly apologize for that i'm gonna vom that's horrific i mean i wiped it off as best i could soap and water in the bathroom but I used that phone for years to come after that. I'm in an easily pukable state right now, so. I didn't poop. I didn't do poop. You didn't do poop. Should we ask the judge if it was a pee-pee or a poopy? Anyone who hasn't watched Jury Duty, what the fuck is wrong with you? Sleeping on it. Go watch it. I have videos. You know when I was talking about my storage space being full? There are videos I will never delete and it's just like videos from Jury Duty. Top 10 best nights at Margaritaville. At Margaritaville. Like, I could go back and just watch it on Amazon, but like, no, I need it on my phone so I can pull it up whenever I feel like it. Gotta pull up the clips. The greatest hits. Anyway, are you gonna rot this weekend? No. Tomorrow, we're going golfing with my in-laws. Just nine holes. Don't get excited. I don't do a full 18. Wasn't excited at all? And then we're going to go to dinner with some friends after for Anthony's best friend's birthday. Where are you going? We're going to like a Middle Eastern restaurant. So this is two weekends with the friends in a row. Yeah. Look at you just adapting to your new life. Congrats, you bitch. And then, thank you, Sunday we're going to go couch shopping. Why? Because we'd like a new couch for our living room. You have a couch. We would like an L-shaped couch. A bigger couch. Okay, I support. Are you going to rot this weekend or what are you going to do? Yeah, we don't got no plans other than just like finishing up a couple projects around the house. Your room is a little messy because I've been reorganizing. So I got to clean that before your arrival in one week. I know. Are you going to pick me up from LAX at 11 p.m.? Probably not. Is your boyfriend going to pick me up? Probably not. Really? You guys are going to make me Uber on a Friday? What else are you doing on a Friday? You don't want to pick me up? I'm just kidding. I'll pick you up or he'll pick you up. One of us will. And I might be hungry and I might need to go to In-N-Out. Or also Jack in the Box. Both of those things do not exist here. Okay, well, don't worry. Whatever your LA dreams are, we'll make them happen. And we'll have Mexican food like we meant to before. I have a question. If the flight gets delayed and then canceled, are you going to give up and not come at all again? No, I have to come because my flight to Sydney leaves out of LAX. You just have to figure it out. I'm so excited. I'm really excited. I can't wait to go home. I know. I can't wait for you to be home. You'll finally be home where you belong. It's going to be so great. Okay, well, thanks everybody for riding with us. Thank you for riding with us. Love one another.
