Pain Is a Compass, Love Is a Guide — Where Life Is Leading You

If you’re hurting, this is for you.

Pain isn’t here to destroy you. It’s trying to move you.
 And love isn’t loud—it quietly tells you where you belong.

In this episode, I talk about how the hardest moments in life can actually guide us away from what’s wrong for us and toward what’s right. I share why survival mode isn’t your fault, why some things had to end, and how even small steps forward still count.

If you’re tired, lost, or just trying to make it through the day—listen. You’re not broken. And you’re not alone.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. If you're on video, yeah, ciao. I just waved that ya. And uh if you're on audio, thank you for showing up no matter where you are. Um thank you for even just tuning into this conversation. And um I'm not necessarily sure exactly what I want to talk about, but I know I do want to discuss life and its parameters, you know. Because I know we all face some type of adversity, you know, and for me what I believe is most important is not just being able to push through it, you know, but having an understanding of what its mechanics are in life, you know, how it helps us and how it kind of routes us to where we're meant to be. You know, and one thing that I've really learned that it's I'm always gonna say this is one of the biggest lessons, um, but a really, really big lesson was that pain is a compass and love is a guide. And what I mean by that is you know, typically in life, pain is giving us an understanding of where to separate from. You know, it it's we get lost in the hurt itself, the occurrence itself, no matter what it is, you know, and and we have to heal from it, but in the pain itself, there is something to be learned. And a lot of times we're being rooted from somewhere, we're being rooted out, whether it's a relationship, whether it's you know an opportunity, whether it's no matter what it is, you know, there's some type of separation that has occurs. And then love is the God because love it tells you where to go, it tells you where to stay, where to build structures, where to build community, you know, and so the way that I look at it, the way that I look at pain as a compass, the way that I look at love as a God, is it's a life's mechanics of shifting us left to right to get to our end goals, you know. Because we all have things that we want, we all have things that we desire, right? But we don't get a say in like how. We never we never get a say in how, and that sometimes is a scary part because the character development that has to transpire for you to get to where you want is gonna come with some lefts, it's gonna come with some rights, it's gonna come with some ups and downs, but they're all actually moving in the same direction. You know, there are places where you know you may have something that you attach to, and that that's the big part of the pain part as well, is when you are separated from something that is not meant for you, but you have a value for it, that's where it hurts. You know, and that can be a relationship, friendship, you know, it could be family, it could even be an opportunity where you feel as meant for you. And life is trying to tell you, hey, you need to separate from this. I can't I can't even allow you to thrive when you're surrounded by this person. I can't allow you to thrive in this environment because if you do, all this goodwill is gonna go to waste because it's in the wrong environment, it's gonna be siphoned, it's gonna be taken. You get what I mean? And so when you decide that you want to align with life, when you decide you want to push forward, when you decide that you want to do things the right way, you need to be in the proper ecosystem, and where you are, you're surrounded with, it may not be the right place, right? And so these things they come in, these very interesting occurrences, and I'll run through some examples, you know, my own right. Um, this can be in relationships or anything, this could be betrayal, you know, someone's done you wrong. You know, um, this could be you know deceit in any way, you know, this could be separation from family, from friendships, you know, this could really be anything of a negative entity, at least it looks negative, right? Because it's really how you perceive it. Um routing you away from this person. And I'm not saying that, of course, at the very first instance of something not going right, you gotta go, but a constant demeanor and understanding of what this person's intent is for in your life, you know, or what this event is in your life, this opportunity that you thought was for you, you know, but it's really meant to guide you away, and I think that's more important than pushing through. Pushing through is important, but just understanding where it's routing you to. And so, you know, a good example I'll give is alright, let's say you're an actor, right? Um, and you have this part that you're auditioning for, and you in your heart, mind, and soul believe this is for you. You know, you've been led to do this, you know, there's been a bunch of random things that have just happened perfectly for you to be in this space, you know, and you go and audition, you know, it's a room full of people, you put your heart into it, you know. And it's a no. And it just completely demoralizes you. It completely, you're just, no, I thought this was for me, I thought this, etc. etc. You know. And then what happens later is maybe someone who saw you could be on your way to the audition or after the audition. You know, it could be one person in the room who actually liked what you did, but maybe they've got something else for you, you know, and at some point they reach back out to you and say, hey, this, that, and the other, or you get what I mean. Like, we have these occurrences where we place a value on what we believe is for us, but at some point we have to practice detachment. And for one, you know, understanding that what's for you is always going to align. It's going to feel like home. It's gonna feel like home. Anything that's meant for you is going to feel like it's not gonna be too much friction, you know. But also it's important to just not fall in love with potential. Right? Because potential is something that's not been reached, you know, and it may not be your destination. You may have just meant to be going to this place to hit this wall, to hit this no, just to make a left. You get me, to hit another wall that looks like a no, but it's actually a yes for your future. You know what I mean? And that's like that's my perspective of pain and how it works, you know, the quote unquote negatives of life, you know, being able to guide you exactly to where you need to be. You know, now on the other side, there's love. You know, there's you know, even me, the place where I'm at now. I mean, if I tell you exactly how I've gotten to the place I am now, and I mean literally in my surroundings, my background, like oh my gosh, it was it's a great amount of pain. It's a great amount of pain. But I'm in the best place in my life that I've been mentally, physically, spiritually, you know, and I'm in a place of love. You know, I know this is where I belong. And this is I've had the most growth in these last couple months that I've had in the last five years. And it's even the exact reason that you're hearing my voice right now if you're listening. You know, and so love is also that guide to say, okay, this pain, this event, this thing that transpired, this thing that maybe broke me. I have to hear from it. I'll get through it. But it took me away from this group, it took me away from this opportunity, it took me away from this person. And then it brought me to this place where wow, I just met someone new. You know, I just made a new friend, I just made a new opportunity. And if this did not happen, if this did not happen, I would not have gone here. If this had not happened, I wouldn't have carried myself in a certain way to this next destination, I wouldn't have met this person, and then I wouldn't be thriving where I am, you know. And so that love tells you where to stay. You know, where it feels like home, it tells you who to stay around, who to build with. And slowly but surely as you go through your journey, it kind of causes for less redirection, you know, in the negative space, or at the very least, the way that you perceive it calls for a like less negative experience. You know, um, I like to say often, uh two people in a coffee shop in the same exact I mean two feet away could be having a a very different experience in life in that same area, and it's because of their perspective of the world, their perspective of what's transpiring in their life. You get what I mean, and so I suppose today is pain is a compass and the love is a God, and adversity is meant for your growth, right? But um I think I'm gonna end it here. But uh I I would love, I would love if you're listening to this, uh, if you're on threads, if you're on any platform where you can reach me, you know, I would love for you to reach out and just speak to me and tell me how you know in your life pain is guiding you, and in your life love is guiding you. Because we're all going through something, we're all experiencing something, and it's leading us to where we're meant to be. I promise you it's leading you to where you're meant to be. You know, and even me recording this right now, I've started this podcast because I I lost a friend of mine um to suicide and I almost lost myself. And before then I was living in survival mode. Before then, I didn't even know. I didn't even know I was living in survival mode until I got out, yeah? And you know, it caused me to completely restructure my life and find my purpose and work on myself. And about four to six years later, I think a four to five years now, I think um I'm really the person I've always wanted to be. You know, and now I'm in a place to where I want to help other people get to that place, you know. And it's fortunately unfortunate. Or fortunately, yeah, fortunately unfortunate that I had to lose someone to get there. But I wouldn't change a thing because it allowed me to be here and to rework my entire life, and that is a pain that still hurts. You know, it still hurts me to this day. Every time I think of them. You know, and I wish I could have been there, but I know I can be there for you. Yeah. So um, I'd love to have a conversation with you. Thank you for listening. Yeah, much love. And um, you know, no step is too small, alright? And no goal is too big. So as long as you're taking strides every day, you know, I don't care if it's the smallest step, I am proud of you, I love you. If no one's telling you I am proud of you, if you have survived to this moment, that means every single day there is nothing you have not gotten through, there's nothing you have not survived if you're listening to this right now. You know? So I believe in you, and you do not deserve to die. I promise you, you don't. You deserve to live, you deserve to thrive. Yeah? Much love. Thank you for listening.