Keeping It Together(ish)

Keeping It Together (ish)

A Growing WildFlowers Podcast Episode

Some days feel calm. Some days feel like cereal on the floor, mismatched shoes, and a deep sigh before 9 a.m. In this episode of Growing WildFlowers, we’re talking about what it really means to keep it together (ish) not perfectly, not quietly, but honestly.

We dive into:

•Why “together-ish” is often the most realistic goal

•How connection matters more than control

•Small, repeatable habits that help families reset in real time

•The power of repair, grace, and showing up again

This episode is part laughter, part deep exhale, and part reminder that you’re not behind you’re growing. If you’ve ever wondered:

“Am I doing enough?”

“Is this normal?”

“Why does everyone else look more put together?”

This one’s for you. 

Because being together-ish is still being together. And that… is enough.

Transcript

Will 0:03

What's up, wild ones? Welcome to Grown Wildflowers podcast where we talk all things, parenting, pets, purpose, and the beautiful meth in between. I'm Will.

Neesh 0:12

And I'm Neach, and today's episode is called Keeping It Together, Ish. Because sometimes the ish is doing the heavy lifting.

Will 0:20

The ish always is. If you have ever said we're fine while quietly struggling with being cleanly in the house or timely or just trying to get your entire family out of the house, this was for you.

Neesh 0:35

And we're not here for perfection, we're here for connection, especially on those messy days.

Will 0:42

That's right. On those messy days. Before we get into it today with this episode, let's clear something up. If you're listening to this thinking everyone else seems like they have it all together, but me, we want you to stop right there.

Neesh 0:57

Right. Because having it together is mostly a highlight reel. And real life happens in the in-between moments. No one posts.

Will 1:07

No one's doing reels about the cereal on the floor or the room before it got vacuumed up.

Neesh 1:16

Yeah, all the toys you had to move before the vacuum.

Will 1:19

All the fussing you had to quiet before he record. Not to mention the luncheons that didn't get packed the night before. Or the conversations you meant to have calmly but failed.

Neesh 1:32

Or we're fine, said through clenched teeth while a kid is crying, another one is running late, and the other kid can't seem to find their missing sock.

Will 1:44

So today, when we say keeping it together-ish, we're not talking about perfection.

Neesh 1:50

We're talking about staying connected, even when things feel undone, loud, or even fragile.

Will 1:56

Together-ish means we're trying.

Neesh 1:59

We're repairing.

Will 2:00

We're choosing each other again.

Neesh 2:02

And honestly, that's all that counts.

Will 2:06

Let's paint a real picture of what Togetherish looks like. Because it's usually not clean, quiet, or coordinated.

Neesh 2:15

It's the teamwork that happens in the moment between us. It's not the perfection in advance.

Will 2:22

There was that morning, right? Where we realized at the same time that nobody had grabbed their book bags. Which means after all of the hard work already, from getting them dressed, making sure they do all the little things they need to, brush their teeth, all the little stuff. No one was ready to walk out the door at that point. Because no one had their bags, no one had their lunch, no one took out their homework to get inside.

Neesh 2:53

So we had to move fast, right? Because it was like five minutes before we actually supposed to leave out on time. I think you made the sandwiches for the lunch. I put the snacks in, and then I found the missing sock. But we didn't panic, we stayed together-ish and made it happen.

Will 3:13

Absolutely. That's together-ish in real time.

Neesh 3:17

And then there's times that we do disagree, and sometimes we raise our voices, and timing is terrible.

Will 3:26

Yeah. And the key is we circle back, we apologize, and we own our part.

Neesh 3:36

Together ish isn't never arguing. It's knowing how to come back to each other, discuss it, and move on.

Will 3:46

Yes, it is. Sometimes that can be challenging, but the key is getting through it, letting voices be heard, meaning really tuning in to listen and then sharing your part, and then you build on top of that. Once you come together and get a clear understanding, it allows for you to move forward.

Neesh 4:06

Exactly. Because it's usually some type of miscommunication. I said I was going to load the dishwasher and I forgot. Now you're behind on cooking dinner because the dishes aren't clean.

Will 4:22

Right.

Neesh 4:23

Yeah. We just gotta work together and time it for that.

Will 4:27

And there's the times when the kids are finally asleep. We didn't get to solve anything major.

Neesh 4:35

Yeah.

Will 4:35

But we sat together, shared a look, exhaled and be grateful for the day, in spite of the chaos that may have occurred.

Neesh 4:47

The miscommunications.

Will 4:50

Definitely the miscommunications. Alright, so we're gonna share some quick things that we do to get through the tough moments, keeping it together-ish, so to speak.

Neesh 5:00

Like when everyone's overstimulated, the things that we do in the house is lower the lights or turn them off completely. Turn the TV off, maybe put on some comic music. I like classical music sometimes for that. Also, we do some family meditation. And we turn on our app and we do the 10-minute one, and it really centers us and brings us back or calm.

Will 5:32

I agree. The girls really do uh enjoy the meditation. You could tell that they get a lot out of it being able to pause and reset, and we enjoy it as well, so it works.

Neesh 5:44

Yeah.

Will 5:45

Alright. Next one. When the day is spiraling, like it feels like everything is going wrong. What do we do? First thing is pause and say it out loud. Like literally, I could tell, I could read the rule over one of us. If it's just like bad energy where it's like clearly something is bothering you, yeah. I'm quick to just say, What's the problem? Go ahead, say it. And that way we get a chance to just put it out there into the ear, whatever the thing is, the girls they'll share something that might be bothering them, pending from a previous day at school, or maybe one of the sisters not doing something the way that they thought they would. And then Niche will definitely tell me in the minute what I did or didn't do. And the same for myself. Like, I really reflect in the moment of just like, all right, look, we gotta do this. This needs to happen.

Neesh 6:46

Right, because sometimes that moment is the hard part. It's not family being mad or upset or not being able to move through. It's just that particular moment that we have to get through.

Will 7:00

Also, there's grabbing a drink of water or a sip of coffee. They sound really basic, but they work. I promise you. Sometimes you're just not feeling that great in the moment. A lot of things are happening. When you take a pause, go into the kitchen, get some water, sip on that a little bit, you feel refreshed.

Neesh 7:23

Yeah, and even tea, especially our oldest daughter. Sometimes we can reset her with some hot tea, and she'll sit and just think and come back.

Will 7:35

Yeah, and all of a sudden she's ready to start sharing some things that might be on her mind. So it helps. Also, we just have it where it's like, all right, you need to go outside. You need to get some fresh air. Or sometimes I'll recognize it myself. I'll be like, you know what? I'm gonna go for a walk, maybe go grab the bell, you know, and get some fresh, crisp hair, uh, or step out on the deck for just a moment, maybe one or two. And the same for the kids. It's like we have to remind them, like, all right, you've been in the house for a little bit, get a little crazy. All right, let's go ahead and step outside for a minute. And you'll do this. They'll take go out, take a deep breath, breathe in that ear, let it out a couple times, and before you know it, we're back ready to rock and filling together is shigured.

Neesh 8:28

Yeah, absolutely. And when we have a day like that, it's almost like dinner is either gonna be late or we have to pivot in what we thought we were gonna do for dinner. And when that happens, our go-to is breakfast for dinner. We're talking some quick pancakes, maybe some eggs, and some type of protein. And we always try to include some type of fruit.

Will 9:02

Let's be clear about this. But pancakes are not quick, they are legit, they're masterful. To have them is a bit of peace within itself. But yes.

Neesh 9:15

Now, I will say, yes, his pancakes are delicious, but mine are unlike any other.

Will 9:25

You drawed it.

unknown 9:27

Okay.

Will 9:29

All right, so let's talk about when emotions are loud. Like literally, meltdowns are happening. Um, what I like to do is one, listen. I get very quiet and I let the children speak for themselves when they're having those meltdowns. Although it may seem like chaos is happening, it is them trying to be heard. So it's important for me to really be intentional about hearing what they're saying through all of the noise because it's very important, and then I can follow up later to get clarity and then support.

Neesh 10:18

Yeah.

Will 10:19

And then there's always karaoke.

Neesh 10:22

Oh yeah.

Will 10:23

And when we shift the to music and dancing or just sing along, karaoke style, fun, it really shifts the mood, and it's always something that everyone is down to do.

Neesh 10:39

Yeah, and there's always a lot of laughter.

Will 10:42

Absolutely.

Neesh 10:43

And other times it's us as parents getting overloaded with the day-to-day. And I know you guys can relate to that, but I try and remember that as parents, we are a teen. And even if our now five-year-old heard no from me and decided to go as Will, I was already a step ahead and already quickly texted Will to tell him she needed to wait to play her iPad.

Will 11:11

Communication is key.

Neesh 11:13

We are definitely doing our best here, but also it's important that we pour into each other, especially by saying something kind to each other, like the time when you had my back, when two of the kids didn't even want to try dinner. Right. But you had your plate and you were eating, and you were like, Mommy made this great meal, guys.

Will 11:41

Yeah. It's important to uh remind them of gratitude. I think sometimes we forget how important it is for their journey, for their development to recognize and appreciate what they have, whether it's a food on the plate or a roof over their head. All right, this is no think, just truth. Say the first thing that comes to mind. No explanations, no parenting manuals. If it's messy, you're doing it right. Let's go. All right, one thing that absolutely did not go as planned.

Neesh 12:16

Probably the snowstorm and the kids having no school for two days. Oh my god. One word to describe today.

Will 12:25

I would have to say resilience. One thing that you let go for your sin.

Neesh 12:32

Probably doing my makeup. I don't have time to do it. My turn. The last text from me that made you smile or laugh.

Will 12:44

I got you. Last night you sent me a clip, and the caption was my two kids at midnight, and it was two kids dancing to some club song. It was hilarious. Okay. Finish this sentence. I feel most supported when you cook dinner.

Neesh 13:10

Take care of dinner. I don't want to have to think about it sometimes. Yeah.

Will 13:15

Cook dinner. Got it. All right. Lone blast is complete. All right. So how do you keep it together-ish? When everyone's overstimulated in your home, what are your go-to ways of mediating? When the day is spiraling, what are your things that you lean on to bring down the noise?

Neesh 13:40

Right. And if you can relate to this episode, keeping it together, ish, then don't forget to tag us on Instagram at the underscore wildflowerway or send us your Bloom Moments. And don't forget to go to the podcast, click on the link for Bloom Moments, and share with us. Your real experiences as parents and youth can also support the podcast if you click on the support podcast link. We appreciate all of our supporters and listeners. Don't forget to subscribe and share.

Will 14:12

All right, wild ones. Stay grinding, stay rooted, and stay honest and stay keeping it together with you.