Give Her The Mic

Pass the Mic - Kim McNeil

• Chloe & Kristen

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Chloe:

All right. We are so excited we got Coach Kim in the building today. We are so freaking pumped to have you here talking, sharing, and you have your own podcast, which we just found. Do I do? I do. So this is not your first rodeo, so. Um, we're just gonna jump right into it. Sure. So, Kim McNeil, everybody. This is Kim. Um, wait, is that still your last name? It is. It's sorry.

Kim McNeil:

Kim McNeil. That is, it is, it's, people ask me

Chloe:

that every day. They're like, I'm not sure what your last name. I,

Kristen:

I don't know either. At this. Yes. Kim.

Chloe:

Coach Kim.

Kristen:

Yeah.

Chloe:

Coach McNeil. What are your girls call you? Coach Kim or Coach McNeil? Coach. Coach Cam.

Kristen:

Cute. I coach K, coach Kim. I

Chloe:

love it. So yeah, you're awesome. You know I love you. Our boys played ball together. Um, Kayden, your son is a freaking all star. He's incredible. Thank you. And then I love Gabby. Yeah, that's my diva. That is her diva. She's 13, right? They're 12. They'll be 13

Kim McNeil:

in January.

Chloe:

Okay.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. Oh gosh. Yeah.

Chloe:

About to step into Kristen's boy's age. The teenage, teenage. I'm already, I'm

Kim McNeil:

already feeling

Kristen:

it, so

Kim McNeil:

I'm

Kristen:

not even, I found an Apple core in my bathroom trash can this morning. That was at the very bottom of the trash can. Someone threw an apple away in the trash can with no anything. Like, no trash bag, nothing. It was probably like a week ago. Oh, when I tell you the dis, like the teenage boy thing is a different level of, yeah.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah, you have

Kristen:

to get ready to just like, you gotta have a good stomach for all that. That's all.

Kim McNeil:

But the girls are sassy. They gave Oh, I bet. Oh, I was, so, so we're going through that stage

Kristen:

right now. Very,

Chloe:

very, very, um, so yeah. So you got two twins? I do. Um, you are obviously the head coach for the women's ECU basketball team, which is like, that's insane. Honestly, I feel like I'm even, but we're in royalty. Yeah,

Kristen:

we really are. No, no, no.

Chloe:

Um. I met you when I knew.'cause Justin was like, dude, this, this, uh, mom on the, the baseball team, you know, she's the head coach for ECU basketball Women's, when I cheered, I cheered In high school. Basketball was my favorite thing to cheer for because I loved the sport and I loved, there's such

Kristen:

good energy. I love

Chloe:

the, the women's ba. Mm-hmm. The girl, well it was girls'cause it was high school, the girls' basketball team. It was such an energy Yes. And such a like. I can't even explain the sport of women's basketball, so I'm so excited for you two, but it's just like. The mental state you have to be in to coach and lead. Yes. Women like that. Mm-hmm. In that kind of sport. Especially that age too. Yeah. Right. You know, I

Kim McNeil:

mean, you're dealing with 17, 18 year olds all the way up to these days. I got 23 year olds on my team. Yeah. Yeah.

Chloe:

cause they're still in school. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I'm sure. So they can play all the way up until they graduate from school.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. So obviously during CI. Um, they gave, um, kids a year back with COVID. So kids are going, we just finished up five years, but I have one kid on my team who was a COVID kid and she got injured. Okay. So six years. Oh wow. So she's probably gonna be 24 when she graduates. We call her grandma.

Chloe:

I mean, hey, you know what? She can still do it. Let her, let her play. So before we get into all that though, we wanna hear about you. Tell us like where you're from and I know you have an

Kristen:

accent for sure. So Yeah. Oh, no,

Chloe:

we wanna hear like where you grew up and what got you into basketball. Like, did you play, like what's the deal with all with, with Kim,

Kim McNeil:

who is she? So, I am from Bassett, Virginia. Okay. You ever heard of Bassett Furniture Company? Yes. There you go. Okay. Oh wow. So when I was younger, I could walk to the Bassett's, the people that owned the furniture company, I could walk to their house.

Chloe:

Oh wow. So it was really,

Kim McNeil:

really small. Um, Martinsville Speedway. Anybody in nascar? Into nascar? I

Chloe:

haven't heard of it, but Justin probably has. He probably does. Okay. So

Kim McNeil:

that was, that's like the city. Okay. So when people don't know Bassett, I say Martinsville. Okay. Um, but very, very small area. Um, I am the youngest of three. I have two older brothers. We're all six years apart, so my little brother's, 6-year-old, other brother's 12, so I have to give them all the credit for getting me into basketball. Okay. They played, um, my oldest brother did, he played football and basketball. My middle brother played a little bit, but um, my family is into like racing. Okay. Like my dad was, um, drag racing. Oh, motorcycles, cars to go fast. Yeah. So they're all my brothers. They're really, really good with their hands. Um. Very smart. My dad was a mechanic, so he was self-employed. Um, but yeah, they made me very tough.

Chloe:

Yeah, very tough. I bet. And you were because I was

Kim McNeil:

You were the baby. I was the baby. Mm-hmm. The baby, baby. I was a tomboy. Yeah, I bet. Probably up until like seventh or eighth grade. Yeah. Like I was the big pans, the big shoes. Like I was not girl, not what I am today, you know? So, but you're still

Chloe:

like cool and sporty. You're just like, I mean, you have Yeezy on, you're like the Yeezy vibe. It's like the. It's like the Kim k, like the, it's

Kim McNeil:

like the sexy, cool vibe. Yeah. My, my, my players keep me young. Yeah. Yeah. I gotta stay cool for them, you know? No, but we do though. We don't even know the lingo. We don't know what's going on. No. And the music, like we, we played music before practice, and I'll put on certain, they'd be like, you know that song? I'm like, yeah, I know. That course. Like this ain out when we were.

Chloe:

13. Yeah. Literally every, every time there's songs like that, they come on. I'm like, okay. Like this is guys. Yeah. This person is 50 now. Yeah. 50 years old. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

So, but that, that's me. I, um, I played all through high school. I probably started playing basketball when I was around second grade. Okay. And my dad built us a really nice. Court. So my house, my brothers, all their friends was over all the time playing basketball. That's so cool. And I would go out there and at first they wouldn't let me play. And I would go in the house crying and my mom would come out and be like, if she can't play, y'all going home. Mm-hmm. You know? So then I started to become pretty good and they wanted me on their team. So all my brothers friends, all my brothers, they take credit for me being a basketball player. I'm like, whatever. Yeah, whatever. So I, um, yeah, I played in college. I went two years to Rafford University. Okay. And I finished out my career at University of Richmond.

Chloe:

Oh, nice. Okay. So what, what brought you to Greenville? Like get, did you immediately start coaching here or was the job

Kim McNeil:

No, I was an assistant for 16 years, so right out of, right out of, um, college, I went to James Madison University. Okay. Um, so I've coached at James Madison, um, university of Richmond. Georgia, Cal, Berkeley. Oh, wow. University of Virginia. Wow. As an assistant. And then my first head coaching job was at University of Hartford. That was in 2016. In Connecticut? In Connecticut, yeah. Yeah. Uhhuh. So I was there for three years. Um, we were pretty successful. And then after that, after my third year, east Carolina called, um, offered me a job. I took it in. I bet that was a fun phone call. It was, it was. Did you know who ECU was at that time? I did. Yeah. I'm so, when I played at University of Richmond, east Carolina was in our conference. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. True. Yeah. Yeah. So I had been here just playing, but I'd never been to Greenville. Um, but when you think of Greenville, you think of College Town. Yeah. And I was like, I don't know. I don't know if I wanna, you know, leaving Hartford was a pretty good city. Yeah. It's like, I don't know. And so, um, once my season was over with. Got on the phone with John Gilbert, the ad here at, uh, east Carolina, um, brought me down on a, um, visit and I was like, wow, this is bigger than what I, what I expected. Yeah. I think Greenville has definitely grown. Yeah. It's grown since I've been here too. Yeah. Um, when was that? When did you

Kristen:

come? What year? 2019. Okay. Oh wow. Yeah.

Chloe:

Wow. Right before COVID. Right before. Oh my gosh. So you've been like recruiting, doing all that from the jump started with COVID?

Kim McNeil:

Yes. That's so It was, it was, um, I thought you'd been here longer. That's wild. No, I started my seventh season. So this would be

Kristen:

my seventh season. But,

Kim McNeil:

you know. Do you still

Kristen:

think Greenville is a big city or bigger city, or how do you feel about Greenville now? Coming from Hartford?

Kim McNeil:

Um, yeah, I'm from a very rural area. Yeah. Bass is very rural. Yeah. So like my, I like Hartford, but I like, I like college towns. Yeah. Like Georgia. You know, Charlottesville, um, James Madison, all those places are considered college towns. Yeah. And that's where I feel like I've been most successful. Yeah. I think you can get the true college experience.

Kristen:

Yeah. Yeah. You

Kim McNeil:

know, if you go to cities, it's like, is that building part of the university? Is that part of the university? And then you go to cities and there's professional sports. Yeah. So you, you don't get. The, the this true. The support. Yeah. Whereas in college towns, you are the show. Oh, yeah. You know, I mean, there was, what, 50,000 people at the football game on Saturday? Yep. So, no, you are the show when you're in a college town. So this is true. I, I like being in college town and then with having kids. My kids they love and I think they, you know, growing up on a college campus, I think it's just awesome. I think they're the luckiest kids in the world.

Chloe:

Yeah. And ECU is so beautiful. Like, I went to ECU, the nursing school here, and I loved just. The college campus culture here Yeah. Was just so beautiful, which is why I stayed so long. Mm-hmm. Because it really was just like, it's just a beautiful place. Mm-hmm. Like they really take good care. They do. Of the campus. They do. Of the, just college in general. So that's exciting that you've been here since 2019. Yeah. Have been, you know, in the thick of it, through COVID, also with, you know, your twins. Mm-hmm. Um, how, let's transition then to that. How is, how is that, because how old are you? I am, how am I

Kim McNeil:

48?

Chloe:

Know anymore?

Kim McNeil:

I'm 48. Yes, 48. That's where I'm at. I'm like, I don't remember. Yeah. 40 man. Um,

Chloe:

I know the other day I was like, asked Justin, I was like, how old are you turning for your birthday? I forgot for real

Kim McNeil:

though. Like what? I was like, I don't know. I mean, sometimes you don't wanna think about, it's like I'm about true 50. Oh my God. Well, you

Kristen:

don't look anywhere. Close to any of

Kim McNeil:

that.

Chloe:

No, no way. But black does

Kristen:

not cry. No. Not even a tiny bit. No, it doesn't. It doesn't. It's just you look

Chloe:

amazing. Thank you. And I know you've been on a big wellness journey. I've watched you go through it the past few years. Like just watch, just, I mean, you've literally aged backwards since I first met you. And so let's talk a little bit about, you know, home life and being on the court like we want to hear. How is that balance? What is it like being a basketball coach for a college and being a mom to two kids that are active? Busy. Yes. Very busy. Yes. Very busy. Not easy. So tell us a little bit about it. Like what does your schedule look like? Like.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. Um, it's not easy, but it's definitely rewarding. Yeah. Yeah. You know, um, obviously in the last two years, my life has changed some, um, and, you know, their dad moved to Chapel Hill, you know, so now it's, I'm I'm doing a lot. Yeah. It's me, you know. Um, so balancing, you know, at a high Division one program where winning is extremely important. Yeah. Um, my players are extremely important. Like I look at myself as their second mom. Yeah. Um, and you know, balancing two kids that are extremely active and I didn't want their lives to change. I didn't wanna say, no, you can't do this anymore'cause mommy doesn't have time.'cause one thing I always promised myself was that I would never let my job interfere with them. Mm. And I didn't want them to feel like they were being put on the back burner. Yeah. So with that, it creates a lot of sacrifices and a lot of long days. But they're just the price

Chloe:

sacrifices that you mean to yourself. Like you put a lot of things that you could be doing on the back burner. Yeah,

Kim McNeil:

I do, but I have, I've, I've found ways to, um, balance it and to manage my time. Um, so there's some things that I just won't give up. Like I won't give up my mornings with them. Yeah. Know. What does that

Chloe:

look like? Tell

Kim McNeil:

us. Yeah. So I get up about six 30 every morning. Okay. Get myself ready and my daughter, my little diva, you know, she, she takes care of, she makes mommy's life a lot easier. She gets up, she gets herself going, she packs her own stuff. They help her energy, man. That's what my 5-year-old does. She already makes the bed man's ready to

Chloe:

go, gets her hair stuff ready. That's girls. Yeah. Freddy's dragging out the bed. Like there's my shorts. I'm like, they're in the

Kim McNeil:

drawer.

Chloe:

Exactly. Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

Well, Kayden, I have to wake him up. Oh yeah. And I've gotta get up, go up there, wake him up, get him going seven times. Yeah. I've got him to the point now where he's picking out his own clothes, which helps mommy. I can't wait for that, you know? So he's picking out his own clothes coming down. Stairs. He has to lay on the couch for a few minutes, eat his breakfast, and then we have, we have time. 7 45, let's go Kayden. Go brush your teeth. You know? And so we have that talk and just how's, what do we got going on today? What's going on in school?

Chloe:

Love that. What

Kim McNeil:

practice we got going on? What games? Um, and then we get in the car and we drop off. And I tell him, have a great day. Love you. Love you mom. And we both go on. Business.

Chloe:

And then where do you go when you drop'em off? You go straight to work or I go work out.

Kim McNeil:

Yes.

Chloe:

I love it. Yes. Do you still go to Orange

Kristen:

Theory?

Kim McNeil:

I don't. Where at? Where do you go at? I'm working out right on campus. That's cool. Because I'm like, you know, and, and I loved Orange Theory, me, don't Get Me, me. I loved

Kristen:

it. I haven't been there in a, about year and a half, two years now. It was a

Kim McNeil:

year from me. I love, I love the community. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Um, I love the support. It just, my life got too busy. Mm-hmm. And the timing's. That they had just didn't fit my schedule. Yeah. Yeah. So it was, it's just so much easier for me to drop off and go right away. Yeah. Yeah. And then that way I'm not coming into work too much. That's great though, that you're

Kristen:

still, you know, I feel like Orange Theory also taught me a lot. It did. About like what my body. Liked. Yeah. And it brought me back to being an athlete. I think that's why I really enjoyed it. Like, it, it, it makes you competitive because you don't wanna look

Kim McNeil:

to your right or your left and they're not doing you.

Kristen:

Yeah. You know, well, when you growing up whole life, you're like, this is my mentality. This is who I am. Yeah. But I, so yeah. I,

Chloe:

but I also love how she talks about, you know, you've had a, had a season of change the past two years and you, you're looking at, I was talking to her about this this morning, like constantly like reassessing, okay, well, is this. Fitting with my schedule right now, right? Or do I need to pivot and change this up? And like, I love the fact that, you know, it's like, yeah, it's a great workout, but you know, it's a great community, but what's gonna be best for you, you and your sanity instead of being stressed running in the car after a workout. You know, trying to rush to get wherever you need to get by a certain time.'cause you did the eight 40 did you did the 8 45. 8 45. And see before

Kim McNeil:

COVID they had a eight 15. They did. Which was better. Yeah. You know, I could drop and go. 8 45 is breakfast. It's 10 o'clock at that point. So after you go an hour and you gotta shower in the shower. You're getting to work to 10 and that's too late. Yeah. You know, that's too late for me. Agreed. So, um, yeah, so I dropped him off, go work out at the weight room at the ECU U. My staff comes with me. So we have this female group. I love when I hear your story,

Chloe:

sometimes you'll put y'all working out together. And I'm like, this is just so, it's like you're the orange theory coach there. You're like. She, she'll be like with her girls lifting weights in the weight room and I love it. I just think it's so cool. I feel, you know, it's, it's like you said, you're a second mom and Yeah. It's just like our kids are always watching us. You know, your girls are, are watching what you do. They're watching how you, how are you consistent? How you take take care of yourself too.'cause it's like after basketball for them it's like they have a whole life. Yeah. That they've

Kim McNeil:

gotta live and build and it's great to have. They love it. They love walking in the weight room and seeing me and my staff in there. They like going through that process of change with like, coach Kim, you look good girl. You know? Yeah, you do. Yeah. Like you, you're taking care of yourself and you know, I just look at myself as an example role model for them a hundred percent through all stages of life. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Um. I don't call myself a coach. I call myself a role model, which with that role model, mom, mentor, all of that, you know, showing them that.'cause so many times we're told as women, like we can't have it all.

Kristen:

Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

But we can period. You know, we can. Mm-hmm. So like I look at myself as that person they could look at and say, can. Coach Kim's got it all. Mm-hmm. Now, coach Kim's not perfect. Mm-hmm. You know, she's got her things she's going through and she's managing through it, but she's finding a way. Yeah. You know, to be able to be with us, be with her kids, you know, finding time for herself. And that's what we did. Like starting in like early August, like text all my assistant, I was like, look guys, like we gotta start taking care of ourselves. Let's, let's work out in the morning, let's start our day off right. And, you know, do some selfcare, mentally, physically mm-hmm. Know so that we can, you know, be successful in this thing called life. You know, because there's times when it's, it's not easy. Oh yeah. You know, it's not, and like I said, my life has changed and it is not easy, but I'm figuring it out. Figuring out my day. And you know, once I work out, you know, I go in my office and I'm watching film or I'm meeting after this, da da.'cause if I don't get my workout done in the morning, it won't happen. That part that's so badass. Like she's watching film just,

Chloe:

just watching film. Just watching the game. Like

Kim McNeil:

what? Look, that's. That's so cool. Watching film, watching practice, having meetings, marketing meetings, budget meetings. She's a boss. It's crazy. Crazy. Love it. And then we have practice, and then sometimes I'm running outta practice to go get them outta school at three 30. Mm-hmm. And I'm running Caden to next level, you know, next level. Yep. Yep. You know, or I'm running, um, you know, Gabby's got volleyball or I'm running Kate into, you know, um. Little league practice what, whatever it is. So my days normally don't end. I know. Sometimes I don't get home till eight o'clock. Yeah.

Chloe:

Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

So it's, it's a long day. Then I've gotta cook dinner and mm-hmm. I'm trying to figure out how to prepare dinner beforehand or the day before.

Kristen:

Yep.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. You know,'cause you know, that's another thing, you know, we get so busy and it's like, it's just so easy to. Go to Chick-fil-A. Oh, yeah. Or go here. Go to when it's not the healthiest thing to do. Yeah, right. You know, so it's like, how do I make sure I'm,

Chloe:

that's the one thing, once you get into wellness, which me and Kristen are so freaking pumped to talk with you about next, but it's like once you get into really understanding food and fueling your body. You really think twice about like, what I'm going to eat. Like the other day I was gonna get some egg bites from like Costco. Mm-hmm. And I was like, dude, I can make this at home and know what the ingredients are. Mm-hmm. And so I stopped and did it, but it's like, it's, it's hard when you're so busy. Um, it's time consuming. Yeah. And even yesterday I went to lunch with my husband and he was trying to go, there was this really good like. Country cooking cafe. There's a lot of good food in Raleigh. I'm gonna just say that it's really a struggle. But I wanted to go to this place that had like fresh juices and that was non GMO and seed oil free right next to it. And he was like fighting me on it. And we finally went in and ate healthy and he was like, I feel better after. And I'm like, food though is not necessarily meant just fuel to be like, oh, this is so satisfying, satisfying. Yet it's fuel. It's about how you feel after it's about your brain. It's about our hormones as women. Mm-hmm. It's a whole thing. Mm-hmm. So, yeah, let's talk, let's back up and talk about that. Yeah. Like me and Kristen have shared a lot about wellness, mental health on this podcast in general. We wanna hear like, you know, obviously you've had, you know, a big health transformation mm-hmm. In the past two years that I've just seen personally. What made you wanna do that? And, you know, what was kind of your breaking point and what did you, what changes did you start making to put yourself first in that. Area so you could do it all.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. Yeah. A lot of things like one just. It was good for my mental health. Hmm. You know, just an hour just to get away. Just to be about not thinking about calling a play, not thinking about, you know, dropping this person off or doing that just a hour for me. You know? And then obviously understanding like, I'm not old, but I am getting older and I wanna be around for my kids, you know, and I wanna be active, I wanna be healthy, you know, for them. So, you know, I, I'll say I probably lost almost 40 pounds. In the last two years. It's amazing. Yeah. Um, you look smashed. Yeah. When you pulled up I was like, okay. Yeah. And it, okay. I just wanted to get back feeling good about myself. Yeah. Yep. That part, you know, you know, we go through things in life where we start doubting ourselves and we start losing, you know, our confidence in ourselves and, um, I just wanted to get back to. Feeling good about what I was seeing in the mirror, not only physically, but, but mentally as well. Mm-hmm. Um, and I think I'm in a good place right now, still working on it, but, um, yeah. And then from the, the eating standpoint, it's hard. Yeah. Like it really is. We're so busy. How do you eat?

Chloe:

Do you use the meal service here or anything to yourself for

Kim McNeil:

lunches? How are you? No, I don't. I try to, you know, pack myself. Lunch in the morning, you know, so I'm not, you know, running around. Then at ECU we have what's called training table for the athletes. So me and my staff, we sneak over there and it's a, it's healthy stuff. Nice. Yeah. That helps. They

Chloe:

should, they better take care of their athletes, so,

Kim McNeil:

so that definitely helps. But, you know, I get up in the morning, you know, I'll do a shake or something and I go work out and afterwards I grab another shake and then I may have like a sandwich, a lot of fruit. Mm-hmm. Um, I really just. Tried to stay away from a lot of fried foods, like processed foods, a lot of water, processed sugar, a lot of water, trying to stay away from the sodas and the juices and all of that. Mm-hmm. Um, trying to limit myself on the breads. Um, just trying to eat, gosh, the breads then. That's the hardest thing. They're so good. I know, I know, I know. That is the hardest, that is the hardest thing. But just a lot of protein are Yeah. Protein. A lot of protein, you know, VE vegetables. Mm-hmm. Um, and so same way with, you know. Gabby's a pretty good eater. She'll eat any vegetable possible, but Kayden. That's, boy, I'm finally, he's finally eating broccoli. We got salad, but his palate is a little limited on what he'll eat. Yeah. Now he'll, he'll load up on the, on the proteins. He loves chicken shrimp. That's how my, that's how bird is, all of that. He loves proteins, but the vegetables, he's not So, so we're getting there, but I'm just trying to be a good example for them and show them, you know, how we. You know, need to eat healthier. And I think the younger you can start it, the easier, easier of a process is for sure. Well, and their

Kristen:

pals. Yeah. Like literally they'll like different foods if you make them try it when they're younger. Exactly. For sure. So, mm-hmm. So

Chloe:

hard though. It's such a hard balance, you know what I mean? Like, I love how you said like, you know. As women, we can sometimes feel limited that we can't do it all. Yeah. When we really can. But it's like, where's the mental health balance in between doing it all? Mm-hmm. And being, well, you know what I mean? Yeah. Because I find myself, I have to pack lunch for my kids every day and it's like packing lunch for them. Making sure I'm eating. Mm-hmm. Making sure that, God forbid, the two animals I have are fed. You know, like sometimes they were, one of them was just staring at me this morning. I was like, what do you want? And I was like, oh shit. I have not fed you. Yeah. I don't even know if I did yesterday. Yeah. But it's like, you know, the balance of trying to do it all because I do believe, and I really feel. This is a woman's world. Mm-hmm. Like women can really do anything. Guys can't do what we do. That No, they could never

Kristen:

carry a child. Girl. They carry a child. No, I mean, Justin, literally, I love Justin, but like the homeschooling thing, like you were talking about for two seconds, he saw how it was and he said, Nope, we're gonna do it this way instead. Uhhuh like we take, I mean, I know, you know, when you're doing it, especially on your own and you don't have somebody else, it's like. H how do we do it? We just do like, do it. God made us, what are we the best multitaskers? Right? Ever. Like there's no way I love you. Like I'm not gonna say I love you man.'cause I really don't, we men can't do it. Yeah. No they couldn't. I was gonna try to be nice for a second, but I was like, I'm just not, there's, they do what we do in the morning's. Why they lot of them just like give up. Like I'm not talking about any man specific right now. I'm just gonna say in general, oh yeah. The amount of single females in this world is. Disgusting single women because there are so many men that are just like, they'll just walk away. Yeah. I could never walk away from my children. I could never sleep at night knowing or not knowing if my kid was fed that day. Right. Like I make sure that my kids like you are fed every single day, but most. Men that have nothing to do with their children, they don't even know that stuff. Yeah. Like I just, I, it fathoms me the way the world is now. Yeah. Yeah. And it just keeps getting worse. It does. They just wipe their hands. It does, yeah.

Chloe:

Yeah. Which is why it's so important for a. Women to be in community with other strong women. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And be like, look, I know it's hard for you, but it's hard for me too. Like

Kristen:

Yeah.

Chloe:

You know, that's what keeps me going when I'm feeling low, is I think about people like Kristen, you other strong women that I know, even if you know. Me. You weren't like getting dinner and doing all that. Right. Which I'm so sad we didn't do that when I lived here. But it's like I look at your lives and I'm like, okay, it's, it's not just me. You know what I mean? Yeah. Everybody's going through. Yeah. Something something. But that's life. Like life is gonna life. Yes. And so that's why I love hearing these tools and tips and things you're saying that you started doing is you got sick and tired of being sick and tired of how Yeah. You fell looking in the mirror, and I remember being there. I know Kristen. Yeah. Went through that. When she actually went through her divorce. Yeah. Like just the way that, you know, you said you, you felt just bad all the time. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And you felt Yeah. You know, and then you start making these changes and it's crazy. Some of the strongest women I know are going through the hardest things in their life right now, but they are take choosing to take care of themselves and prioritize themselves. And on the other side of that. They are feeling good after, most of the time, you're not gonna feel good when you're in it, right? I don't know many women that do that, but, but it's like the wildly successful women are doing these things consistently behind the scenes. It's every choice you make, it's the vitamins, all of it, the vitamins, it. I love what you said about the kids, like you don't, didn't want, when you had, you went through some recent life changes in the past few years. You didn't want your kids' lives to change. Um, and, and obviously they, they did, but in the ways of, you didn't wanna say no because you didn't wanna feel overwhelmed, but obviously you felt overwhelmed, but you stopped and said, okay, my mental health isn't where it needs to be. I'm coaching how, how many women do you coach? Tell me right now I have 13. Oh my gosh. You're coaching 13 women. Mm-hmm. And how are you gonna be mentally well? And I think that's one of those things I know I think about often is like, okay, why am I acting like this? Why do I feel this way? Okay, what can I do to like de-stress? Or what can I do to like mental? Okay, have I made an appointment with my life coach? Mm-hmm. Have I have a walk today? And like, so one ritual I started doing every morning. Because I can't lift weights right now. Right. As of this week, my doctor was like, you can't do that. And I was like, you're joking, right? And he was like, you can walk or use the elliptical. And I was like, you're killing me. But I got this like little watch'cause I don't have an Apple watch and I just gotta watch that's like, does my steps and stuff. And I was like, I'm gonna set a goal. Right. And this is something my therapist talks about a lot is set a goal for yourself. Mm-hmm. Of what you wanna do. Every day even. Even if it's something small. And I was like, I'm gonna get 3000 steps in before 8:00 AM every day. Mm-hmm. And it's like those little, like me and Kristen were talking the other day about meals. Yeah. Because she goes through a lot. Yeah.

Kristen:

My schedule's just wild as a nurse during the week, and then with Beckett's football and getting him and everything else in between meals, like you said. And that to me is something. Take very sacred. Like, I love to cook for my boys. I know. I hate when they don't eat good food. I know. It like tears me up inside. It's ridiculous. And I don't cook on days that I work. Mm-hmm. So, but she was like, meal prep. And I'm like, okay. I, I felt so much, I feel better already. You know? Right now i's freaking happen, happen what meals we're gonna make for that week. It is like, you can't do it every week. Some weeks

Chloe:

you're gonna have nights where it's like, hey, a sandwich night, go up in there and whatever. Yeah. But I think it's like. Knowing and leaning on other women for help, right? Yes. When you know you need it, because I feel like a lot of women who, who wanna do it all and do it all like us, we don't ask for help a lot. No. Because we think

Kim McNeil:

we're superwoman. We can do it all. Yeah. We are super, I'm confused, right? And we're, but it's also like, look, maybe this you're

Chloe:

not, but maybe this week you're not. Yeah. So lean in. Yeah. Leaning in to be like, okay, well here's something I do to help me. Or what is something you do to help you? It's just, that's what. That's what I love to see in communities of women is like, how can I help you? How can, how can you help me? Because it's those little things. It's like getting your mental head state right in the morning mm-hmm. Before you, you know, have to, God, have your kids wake up. I wake up at five 15 now. Mm-hmm. Because. Now a girl, because I gotta be out the door and on the road.'cause Raleigh traffic's crazy by seven. Yes. Wow. And so I wake up at five 15, that way I can make my latte. I can only have one a day. God bless America. My doctor cut my coffee back. So I make my little latte and I get my steps in. I may watch the news but start stressing me out. I turn that off. I know. And then, mm-hmm. Then oh yeah, I'll turn a show on, you know, desperate Housewives or some ratchet show, like something just mindless. Yeah. Um. And then I'll get my steps in and just the walking, that movement yeah, just automatically shuts me up because my head, I'm sure. Y'all can get in that same state. It's like your head will just start going in the morning. It's like, chill sis.

Kristen:

Yeah.

Chloe:

We are not even out the door yet. They haven't

Kristen:

started yet. Yeah, not yet. There's not even a problem yet Day. There's even an issue yet. No. Well, and can I know, you said this to me the other day, the other thing that helps is controlling what you can. Yes. You know, and the rest, it's like. It is what it is. I don't, you know, I gave that to God. Yeah. Like, I can't, and that's one thing that really helps me is doing my devotional in the morning. Yeah. When I start my day talking to God, if I don't, it's like you can feel everything go haywire.

Kim McNeil:

Mm-hmm. You know? Yeah. That's, that's a good point. Like, sometimes we stress over things that.

Kristen:

Haven't even

Kim McNeil:

happened. Haven't happened. I told my mom that

Kristen:

the other day. Yeah, she was like, she said she had this thing on her eyebrow and she's like, I know it's probably gonna be melanoma. And then she said, and I know I probably got it from the tanning beds and X, Y, and Z. I said, mom, you just tried to give yourself cancer and you figure out what caused that cancer and you haven't even been to a doctor. Right, right. Can we stop? Right. Like I just. Cannot. I'm like, mom, no. But we do that so much. You know? We do. We do. No, we create scenarios in our heads. We really do. Which is why

Chloe:

is so Who coaches you? Nobody. Oh yeah. That's my challenge for you. Yeah. Who coaches The coach? Yeah. Who coach? Who coach? This was coach. Somebody told me a couple years ago, coach, I used to do a lot of coaching with women. I don't do as much anymore. Um, but in the business, me and Kristen have, we used to do a lot of like coaching calls mm-hmm. And things like that. And I, I ended up going into a deep spiral'cause I just wasn't taking care of myself and I was taking care of myself. Mm-hmm. And I was taking care of everybody else. Mm-hmm. And um, one thing that my. Pastor said to me, he was like, who's coaching you? Yeah. Like you're a big coach, you're a big mentor to people. And so that's when I found my life coach, um, her name's Angel and she really, she, it, I literally didn't even know they existed life coaches, but it's like. She helps me. Like I just vent everything to her. And it's not just like, how do you feel? It's like, what, okay, let's talk about this and how we can make this better. Right? This doesn't make sense. Let's walk through this week. Let's walk through next month. Let's walk through. You know? And so I think like too, as women, we do deserve a coach. Yeah. We deserve a men, we deserve somebody I, I'll gladly pay. It's like she, our life coach is expensive. She's one 50 an hour. Yeah. But I'm like, I will gladly pay that once a month. To have somebody, and I can give you her info. Okay. She's great. But I just think that that's one of those things too, as women, we don't realize. That we do need to be coached and we do need to be filled and have our cups filled by somebody. It's almost like when you go and you have a personal trainer. Mm-hmm. Right? Every, we've all had those moments where we've had personal trainers like be even beyond Orange Theory, like when you went to the gym and you just have a personal trainer. You're like, this is so great. I don't have to think. I don't to. Tell me what

Kristen:

to do with my body. Yeah. Right, right. Yes.

Chloe:

And that's, I I feel like life coaches Yes. Are really gonna blow up in the next five years. Yeah. You could even be a life coach one day. You never know. Yes. And I know, oh, let's, this goes in Kristen, what she was saying about, um. You wanna do after your coach? Oh, after the broadcast. Can we

Kim McNeil:

talk about that? Of course, of course. Yeah. So obviously, um, one day the coaching hat's gonna be hung up. Yeah. And I though

Kristen:

I, you are such a young, but how many year old 20

Chloe:

years now has she been doing basketball? No. 26 years.

Kristen:

What? Oh yeah. That is a long test, teacher retirement done. That really is. Yeah, this is 26

Chloe:

years. I'm like,

Kim McNeil:

wow. This

Kristen:

is exactly, can you imagine her being hot

Chloe:

and 50 and being like, she's on ES, espn. Oh, yeah. Oh,

Kristen:

already. Oh, yeah. She, I wanna go into, bro, I wanna stay involved in the sport. She's the best. Teeth and smile too. And skin. Oh yeah. Is

Chloe:

cool.

Kristen:

Yeah. She's cool. You're

Chloe:

cool. But like, you got it together. Don't play with me. That's your, that's your vibe off. Like you were cool.

Kristen:

That's why I literally thought you were like, from New York or where I was from, because you give me that vibe a lot like me. You're just like, well, my, my daughter told me,

Kim McNeil:

she's told me I'm a badie. Yeah, for sure. Period. Sure. She also told me, I, I have a. RBFI.

Chloe:

Yeah, we, all three of us do. It's okay. Yeah. Yeah. And at first I was like, what is that? We're just thinking. And she's like, I can't say it wrong. We're I just thinking? I was like,

Kim McNeil:

yeah. And a lot, I, a lot of people say that like, I have an intimidating look and I'm like, maybe I'm just passionate. I don't know. I don't mean to do it, but yeah. Maybe they're

Kristen:

just intimidated. Could be that too. Yeah.

Chloe:

I've never thought that. When I've seen you, I've been told that a lot about my style.

Kristen:

People are like, especially men. Yeah. You're very intimidated. Yes. No, you're just intimidated. I get that by my aura. I don't know. Confidence. I think it all goes

Chloe:

back to the right people are going to attract you though, with the similar personalities. Sure. And go, no, like you're awesome. No, I love this. Yeah. Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

Like that's just your personality type. I mean, if you, if you catch me in my. In my workplace. You're a coach.

Chloe:

What do they want? You, you, they want you to be chill. Like if I, if

Kim McNeil:

I, if I'm not recruiting, what? I am serious. I'm looking, I'm trying to find you. You have to be, but like you said, you've never seen it.'cause I'm at Caden's games and I'm having fun, or I'm at Gabby's games and now I can just be mom, you know? Yeah. So I probably don't have that face then, but Yeah. Yeah. That's, but

Chloe:

what's that thing you used to always say at the games though? I would hear you. Oh. What is it? Compete? She'd be like, yeah, they'd be out there in the field and then we'd be in the stands and I would hear Kim go, compete.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah, compete. I'd be okay. Compete all about your approach and all about your mentality. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. So

Chloe:

let's get back to that though, a little bit like after basketball, like what is, what does that look like? Have you started thinking about like what with broadcasting, like do you have any. Like ins or people, you know? I'm sure.

Kim McNeil:

Or like, I don't, you know, I, I, I am a big goal setter though. Yeah. Like, I am so, like, I'm five years, 10 years, like what do I want that to look like? Yeah.

Chloe:

cause kids will be out the house. Yes. They'll, in fiveish years, they'll, they

Kim McNeil:

will. And it'll be, I'll be an empty nester.

Chloe:

Woo. Watch

Kim McNeil:

up boys. I'm just kidding. No, but I, I love it. Um, I don't, I, this is crazy. My mom would probably say like. When I was younger in, in high school and stuff, I hated talking to people like I did. Like I'm from a really small town so everybody knew who I was. Basketball player. Really good. And, and they would come up and try to talk to me about the game last night or whatever and I would give'em like one word answers. Yeah. My mom was like, you gotta, and my mom, you know my mom, granny,

Chloe:

oh, I love granny so much. TCE loves her mom. Oh my God.

Kim McNeil:

She can talk to that point right there. Told me to tell you, to tell granny, Hey, by the way I told her I was there. I'll she'll be back. Thur, she's coming Thursday. But, um, we couldn't be more different. Like she will talk to total strangers. And even now when she comes and helps me in Greenville, if I've gotta go somewhere quick, granny's not going stuck because she's gonna talk to everybody. She gets stuck. Get stuck. Yeah. But when I went to college, like it just puts you in an environment where you have to learn to talk. You know, especially being an athlete, you've gotta be able to talk, you gotta be able talk to your teammates or your coaches, media, whatever. And now like, I, I love it. Love that. Like I really do. I that like, I love getting interviewed, I love doing interviews. Um, I just recently started my own podcast. Mm-hmm. Yes. Tell everybody about that. What's it called? Called and Kim Court.

Chloe:

Kim's court, y'all. What do y'all talk

Kim McNeil:

about? I'm so curious. Anything ECU, women's basketball. Cool. You know, whether it's, you know, I had my best guest on last week, Gabrielle and Kayden, my twins. Oh my gosh. Oh, oh.

Chloe:

We're gonna share it on our podcast or on, give her the mic and our story. I'll share the, it was

Kim McNeil:

so fun. And Power Nation will get the opportunity to, to learn and to see kind of behind the scenes Yeah. My life a little bit and how it is being, you know. You know, kids to coaches,'cause both of their parents are coaches, you know? Right. Yeah. So just their experiences and things like that. But, oh, your ex is a coach? Yes,

Chloe:

yes. Yeah. He coaches at Chapel Hill? Yeah, he's at Chapel Hill. Okay. Okay. We used to

Kim McNeil:

be, we used to coach together, so we had coached together for, let's see, five years of Virginia, three years at Hartford. Wow. So all the kids know is coaches,

Chloe:

parents that are coaches, that's all they know. Going to games, going to practices, that's

Kim McNeil:

all they know.

Chloe:

Does your daughter play sports

Kim McNeil:

Volleyball. Oh, nice. Yeah, but she's, is she tall or she No, no, no. So she, um, she's athletic. Yeah, she is. She played basketball. She plays basketball. She played softball. Um, she let put softball down and picked up a volleyball last, um, August. Girl Volleyball's big here. I love volleyball. Like one of the girls used to

Chloe:

mentor Maddie Mira. She used to be on the ECU volleyball team. Okay. But she stopped after this year, but she played volleyball here and. Loved it. Yeah. Grew up playing, started when she was like, Gabby's age and there's a, there's a lot of opportunity. Mm-hmm.

Kim McNeil:

Volleyball and softball is starting to take over women's basketball a little bit. Yes. Yeah. They're taking some of our players, which is making it, making my, my job a lot harder. But yeah, she just picked up a volleyball last August and was like, mommy, I want to try out for the team. And I was like. Okay. She's never played, so I was, I was nervous for her and she got out there and made the team and you're probably

Chloe:

compete. I'm just kidding.

Kim McNeil:

But you know what? Compete. I love her playing volleyball. I never played it. Yeah. So I don't really understand it. It's probably

Chloe:

a good thing.

Kim McNeil:

So when I go watch her play you, I can be mom. Yeah. And I can cheer and not coach versus, yes.'cause now it's even like

Chloe:

baseball, even though you haven't coached it, you've been around it so long. Played softball, you get it. Oh, okay. So yeah, you know, sport I softball, like softball

Kim McNeil:

was my sport before basketball. Okay. Like I played all the way up to my ninth grade year. What position? At first base. Okay. Oh, I love it. I loved it. But back in mid nineties it wasn't a lot of opportunity in softball. No. Yeah, no. So I had to go with what? Was gonna get me. Mm-hmm. A free education. Yeah. So I put softball down and went to basketball. So when I watched Caden play baseball, like I have a knowledge of it, so I'm still coaching. You see yourself in him too? Yeah. He's like

Chloe:

the best on the team girl. He's like short, he's like the shortstop, you know what I'm saying? Oh my gosh. Yeah. Any position really quick. Yeah, he loves it. He loves it.

Kim McNeil:

And then when Gabby played softball, like, so when she plays volleyball, I just sit back and watch.'cause I, and I, like this morning I said something about. Hitting it. She's like, I hate it when people talk about volleyball and they don't know the right terminology. And I was like, well, what is it called? She's like, it's a pass. And I was like, okay. Like I'm learning. I like football pass, like I'm learning. But yeah, I just get to be moms. I love it. So I love it. I really do. I love it. I love that.

Chloe:

That's really cool. So it sounds like you've been through a lot of transitions in the past two years. Mm-hmm. Two years. What have. What have you learned through that? Like from being a mom, being a coach, like what have you really learned is important in life and what are things that don't really matter? Yeah, I know that's kind of a loaded question. I'm sure Kristen,'cause she's been through.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah.

Chloe:

Big transition like this before as well. I think

Kim McNeil:

the most important thing is you gotta take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Mm. Yeah. You know, and I'm in a position where I, you know, I take care of Gabby, Gabrielle, and Caden on a daily basis, even though, you know, dad, Corey's still involved. Right. You know, he's, yeah. Comes as much as he can and they go stay with him. But they're with me every day. Yeah. You know? And then I have my team, they live here. Yeah. They live with me, you know, and then I have my team. Which I'm like, mom away from home.

Kristen:

Yeah.

Kim McNeil:

I have my staff that I'm managing. So like I'm in, I'm in charge of a lot of people. Mm-hmm. And I had to, you know, really sit back and say, Hey, I gotta take care of me first before I can take care of them. Like a damaged me, can't Yeah. Take care of them. You know? And so that's when I really started. Getting back to working out and, you know, doing different things to, you know, the mental health part of it, taking care of me, you know, before I could take care of others. So that, that's the biggest thing is like, I've gotta, I gotta take care of me. Yeah, yeah,

Chloe:

yeah. And in saying that, what are, I know you mentioned like you. Obviously getting up, making sure the kids are ready to go. But having that, I'm sure you have that quiet time as every parent does. Before we get our kids up, we know. Yes. Now we get why our parents were sitting alone. Oh yes. Drinking a cup of coffee at 5:00 AM Yeah, now we know. But it's like I love that

Kristen:

quiet time in the morning. Even when they're older. It's wonderful.

Chloe:

Yeah. Oh, I love it. Now it's now that I've got my routine, that's why I text you thoroughly and she'll be at work and she's probably thinking, why is she up? It's'cause. It just helps my day go so much better when I get up and just have that time. And can, I mean, I have like an indoor treadmill Yeah. Walking tread. So I walk that. But um, I know you mentioned too, obviously the eating and the mental health and mm-hmm. The working out. And so those were big changes. Like you said, big, you made. And making it a

Kim McNeil:

priority. Yes. Like scheduling some things around that. Yeah. And I

Kristen:

think sometimes when you're in a relationship with somebody and you're married to a partner and whatever, you don't realize how much you're not doing those things. It's almost like you get intertwined with them and like you lose yourself so much in the process. And it definitely took me getting out of my marriage to realize, you know, I had let myself. I looked like a different person, you know, like completely different person. And it wasn't his fault. It wasn't anybody's fault. It was my fault for not even doing those things like I had done my whole life. Yeah. Not prioritizing yourself. Yes. Yeah. Trusting your intuition,

Chloe:

going after those things. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's, it's so important. So we talked about a lot of things on, we have 40 minutes, which I love. I know. I kind of wanna end it on. Two things. The first thing is what do you do for fun?

Kristen:

I,

Chloe:

are you dating? Are you, what are you doing for fun? I know I

Kristen:

don't. Yeah. Do you like go to dinner with friends? Do you get a glass of wine with friends? Do you like, what do you do on the weekend? Do you ever have a weekend night, like free? Yeah. I'm really close with my staff.

Kim McNeil:

I like that. Yeah. You know, we're, we're like family. Yeah. You know, so we have game nights. Yeah. Cool. Um, when they come over and, you know, I just did a, um, a pool. Yeah. But I did an addition to my backyard. Have you, did you see the video of that? Oh

Chloe:

no. I gotta

Kim McNeil:

go look at it. I've, its beautiful. Yeah. So in June I decided so. Live right off Charles and they're building, um, a new church. So with that, um, they gave all of us, the people whose um, yards were backed up to the, the field, 50 extra dish feet of, of, of, of land. Mm-hmm. So when they did it, I was like, and I had been talking, me and Corey the whole time we've been here, it's like, we wanna do something else to the backyard. And then once they did that, oh, this was done

Chloe:

right before the end of year pool party last year. This for Brown and Wood, right? Yes. This year. Finished in June.'cause we had, we were somewhere and we missed it. That's why you see, didn't get to go, but Brody was there. Yes. Okay. So,

Kim McNeil:

um, yeah, so it's like my little resort back there. Cute. I already had the pool, but I, um, I put in a, um, a sauna. Oh, yes, please. Well, a jacuzzi, I got a jacuzzi. I love a damn hot tub. Girl. Little wellness time. A fire pit. Yes. And then a cabana that has like a outdoor kitchen, the TV, bathroom and all of that. So yes, it's like wonder when I walk out my bedroom, happy

Chloe:

little day. That's, but when

Kim McNeil:

I walk back there, I, I don't even feel like I'm in Greenville. Like I feel like I'm like. It'll, because I got like some palm trees and all that out there. Oh, I love

Kristen:

it. Oh my gosh. So, so that's

Kim McNeil:

relaxing. I get into the jacuzzi and

Kristen:

ugh. I just, I just relax. I couldn't even be sad if I had that. Like I live in a townhouse. I feel like when I walk out back, excuse me, I don't see anything but my neighbor's backyard. So there's like, there's like dog shiting

Chloe:

in my yard when I walk outside my townhouse. Yeah, exactly.

Kristen:

Exactly. I love that. No, that's wonderful. Kids created your own piece. I did, I did. Which is wonderful. I just

Kim McNeil:

kind of told, um, my landscaper, I was like, okay. My construction guy was like, this is what I want. He draw drew up the the prince for, and I was like, yep, that's it. And it actually turned out way better than I expected and bigger than I expected.

Chloe:

Yeah. Well and it sounds like too, based off everything you said, yes, you love talking to people, you do that now, but probably your recharge time is by yourself. My God. That's where mine is. Yeah. I'm like.

Kim McNeil:

Yes. Yeah. When I go, when I finally get home, I just want to go in my room and just woosah for like 30 minutes. I just need that alone time for like 30 minutes.'cause that's all I've been doing all day is talking and managing and, and coaching and doing all, I just want like 30 minutes to myself to just sit there and just relax. I love

Chloe:

that. I think that's so important for the viewers to hear too. Yeah. Because I know you're really good at that. I do that after

Kim McNeil:

work. Yeah.

Kristen:

I have to. I have to. I will snap on that. Otherwise, I walk through a messy h you know what I'm saying? Like I could just, so I go right out back and I sit there for 20 minutes by myself at least, and then I go back inside and I'm good. Well, and your

Chloe:

boys are like very, they love their mom. They do. Mom, very much. Mom, mom and mom walk in. One just

Kristen:

turned 18 and one's about to be six. Team, but they're like, you know, yeah. And I, I'm so thankful, but I'm like, huh. But I love, love hearing another women say that

Chloe:

because it's like, sometimes you feel guilty, but it's like, no, you need to take that time if you need a minute, so you can go out there and be mom. Like even this morning I was trying to get ready and my kids were like, Hey mom, I need this. Hey mom, this. And I said. I'm gonna shut the door. I gotta get ready. Yeah. Yeah. And then I will help you guys with whatever you need, but I have to get ready.

Kim McNeil:

Yep. Which, you know, I had to get myself to that point. Oh yeah. Don't we all I did like, I'm sure, yeah. I mean, well, y'all don't

Chloe:

have help.

Kim McNeil:

No. In the morning? No, not in, in the morning. You know, I'm saying my, my mom granny will be back Thursday. Okay. So she is a huge help. Do you

Chloe:

think she'd ever move in or do you not? Um, you like having your space? I need that.

Kim McNeil:

I think I need that space. You, your space. Yeah. No, for sure. Um, but I had to get myself to that point'cause I was feeling guilty when I started taking me time. Yeah. You know, when I started doing things. Well, it's not natural for women to do that. No, it's not.'cause do we feel like we've gotta, you know, mommy has to be there. Mommy has to do everything. Yeah. Manage everywhere. Manage everywhere. And so, um. You know, I take a couple of weekends out of the year for me. Like for this weekend I'm going to Vegas. Oh my gosh. Okay. Why haven't you

Chloe:

told us that for fun? You're gonna Vegas.'cause I'm

Kim McNeil:

a huge Las Vegas Raider fan. Oh my. Oh my gosh. Even though we're not doing so well, it's okay. I'm a Titans

Chloe:

fan, so I understand.

Kim McNeil:

I went last year and I had the best time and I was like, I'm gonna do this every year. Are you going by yourself?

Chloe:

Yeah. That's so good. That sounds like my kind of trip. I love that. So much. If I said that Christian, be like, nah, I'm coming with you. I'd be like, I'll meet you there. Yeah. I did it last year and

Kim McNeil:

it was great. I love it. And I was like, you know what, I'm gonna do this every year.

Chloe:

Oh, that's so nice. So where are you staying at? I'm gonna stay

Kim McNeil:

at, um, Mandalay Bay. Oh yes. Because I can just walk right out back in the, the arena is right there. Yes. I was hoping the Las Vegas ACEs was gonna be playing'cause they're in the playoffs. Yeah. That's the WNBA team there. Yeah. Um, but they're actually gonna, yeah. Probably be on the road, but I, you know, I used to feel guilty. Caden has a travel ball tournament this weekend and he said to me, he was like. So you missing my travel ball tournament? And I'm like, Kaden, like, what'd you say girl? They'll say that in a second too. You won't they? I said, Caden, I barely miss. Yep. Any of your games? Yep. I said, mommy needs some time. Yes.

Kristen:

I love you have p It have to set boundaries with them in that way too. Like Becky will say things to me that really will hurt my feelings. Like, you left a minute early from my game. I'm like, excuse me, y'all. I didn't take my allergy medicine. I told them for like a week and now I'm struggling. But I'm like, but you didn't realize. Like I've been here. Every practice. Yes, every game. Yes. It's an hour and a half ride home. It's dark out. I had to get my mom home. You have to look at the bigger picture. Mm-hmm. Kids are so quick to be like. But you have to make them like you have to, you know? Yeah. And I think it's so good that you're showing him that, how important this is.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. I

Kristen:

told him, I said, mommy needs yes

Kim McNeil:

mommy time. And so that way he'll be that kind of parent. Yeah. You know, he didn't take it too well. And for a second I felt bad, but then he'll be all right. I'm like,

Kristen:

yeah,

Kim McNeil:

I'll be at the next, yeah. A hundred travel ball tournaments. Well, and he probably

Chloe:

thinks honestly so highly of you because you are a coach, he probably wants like. Really wants mom out there. But I think too, one thing that really stood out that both of y'all said is you're communicating with your kids. Yeah. And I think that's super important because I grew up in a house where it was like my parents would do things and they were, there was just no communication behind it. Mm-hmm. And I didn't understand, yeah. Like, why is my dad in the bedroom? Or why does my mom need to go out or do this? And it's like that communication of no, like, Hey, I don't do a lot for myself. Yeah. And. This is gonna make me better whenever I get home and see you. I just need a minute. I love you. Yeah, and I, I, I love that type of parenting. I think it's, it's so important because especially when you are such a hands-on parent, it's not like you're going out and doing freaking crack that part.

Kristen:

You know what I mean? That part. It could be so much work. You could

Chloe:

be going out, you know what I mean? Doing God knows what. Yeah, you're going to Vegas by yourself. Yeah. To see my, to

Kim McNeil:

see a game. To see a game. Yeah. You know, and

Chloe:

that's gonna like refuel and replenish you and I hope you go and make sure you get some really good food and like, God, I de it will

Kim McNeil:

map it

Chloe:

out.

Kim McNeil:

I'm gonna spa, I'm gonna gimme an appointment, I'm gonna get a massage. I love it. Have some good outfits to you

Chloe:

on. Yes. I love that. And that's such a good like way to like end because I was gonna ask at the end like what you wanna leave. For women for our podcast, we're really big on setting women up. Yeah. For the position of, you know, conquering their own mind and being successful, and I love. I love where you went with that on you're actually taking a trip. Yeah, and that's something me and Kristen said right before I got pregnant actually. We were like, we're gonna, like, we wanna go to Paris next year. Yeah. So it's like, I love, I love this position of, it's. It's okay to to do that. It is, it's okay to go and And take a minute. It's okay to

Kim McNeil:

put yourself first. Yes. You're gonna line your kids up.

Chloe:

They'll be in great hands. They got granny, they got dad. Granny treats them better than she did me when I was She does. She Sure. I know. I know. I look at the way my parents are and even my in-laws with my kids and I'm like.

Kristen:

What

Chloe:

I mean, my

Kristen:

17-year-old son has a motorcycle. The fact that my parents haven't killed him, like they, there's no way I could have had a motorcycle. Oh, no way. You know what I'm saying? No. Well, he's 18 now.

Kim McNeil:

Oh, yeah. 18. I was a, I grew up on motorcycles, so Yeah, no,

Kristen:

so did

Kim McNeil:

I. But when you're

Kristen:

kid has one, yeah, it's a little different. I mean, he's good. God's got'em. Yeah. He has all the gear on. Yeah. Does that's, he does. He's, well, no, he knows how to pop wheelies now and stuff. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, it's, it's fun. Anywho. But

Chloe:

yeah, if you could leave women with just one thing. Maybe even like a phrase. Yeah. You're a coach. Yeah. You're a mom. You are Kim. Mm-hmm. Most importantly. What do you wanna leave our viewers with today to inspire them or uplift them if they're going through a hard time right now?

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. I just, as what I've said before, don't be afraid to put yourself first and to take care of yourself because you can't take care of others if you're not in a good place. You know, and it took me a, a little bit of time to get there and to have that mindset because I felt guilty when I wasn't at the baseball game or I wasn't at the volleyball game or whatever. But, you know, this weekend I need this. Yeah. You know, my season's about to start. I'm about to be boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, you know? So I gave my, my team and my staff, you know, our first official practice started Monday. We're gonna play till November 3rd. So I, but I gave them Friday, Saturday, Sunday off.'cause I think we all need. To rejuvenate and get ready because this season's gonna be long. It's gonna be a great season. But you know, just don't be afraid to take time and put yourself first, you know?

Chloe:

Yes.

Kim McNeil:

Yeah. I

Kristen:

love it. Don't be afraid. I love it. Yep.

Chloe:

Ah, so good. And don't feel

Kristen:

guilty.

Chloe:

Don't feel, even if you feel guilty, do it anyway. Yeah. You'll feel better after it's gonna be, it just means

Kristen:

you're a great mom and a great person if you feel guilty'cause you

Chloe:

care. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And it, and it just means that you don't, you don't want to fail. And I think that's the, no, I don't. That's a really strong attribute of successful women is you do not want to fail. No. But finding that balance of. I'm gonna take care of myself. I'm gonna feel better after I do this in the morning, this ritual, or get my devotion, do 3000 steps, set myself up for success workout. Yep. Um, and so thank you so much. I thank you guys for having me. This is awesome. Glad the mic. So guys, please go see Coach Kim at some games. Yeah, yeah. Follow her. We're gonna share her, um, podcast on our platforms. It's Kim's court. Write two K's court. Yep. And, um, guys, if, if she can do it,

Kristen:

yeah. Yes. I

Chloe:

mean, it's the, the world is out there for us to go and take and we, we can't wait. You're gonna be on the big screens one day. That's your next step. And we got her on, give her the mic in 2025. We're gonna be like, we remember her. Yes. Um, but seriously, thank you so much. We, we love you. Oh, thank you guys for having me. We're praying for your season. We know it's gonna be excellent. Please go support women's basketball. Yes, go to games, show up, support this community, and we'll see you guys later. Bye. See ya.